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all 99 comments

[–]jackcrumpet 59 points60 points ago

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Reminds me of this.

[–]FredL2 21 points22 points ago

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That's tragic as fuck.

[–]ukickmydog 10 points11 points ago

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[–]BaronVonKlotz 1 point2 points ago

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"Two smacks... EH EH EH!" Seriously, one of the best things I've ever seen.

[–]DoctorMagazine 6 points7 points ago

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[–]frissonFry 1 point2 points ago

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Reminds me of this.

[–]Naeddyr 23 points24 points ago

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So what was his PhD? The letter S thing seems to indicate something to do with the history of writing systems, so maybe linguistics or Egyptology or Semitic, Classical or English philology (though the English S is pretty boring). Maybe something to do with typography or design?

[–]fetusxfajita[S] 40 points41 points ago

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it is a little known fact that cookie monster created helvetica in 1957 and sold it to max miedinger and edward hoffmann for a total of 500 cookies.

[–]Naeddyr 3 points4 points ago

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Can you get degrees in typographical design? I mean, I know it's an art-ish thing with lots of design theory and other stuff like that, but is there enough meat to it that it's not grouped together with some more established and more general thing?

[–]fetusxfajita[S] 5 points6 points ago

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you can, there isn't much of a demand for it anymore, but you certainly can do it.

[–]demengrad 4 points5 points ago

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I imagine the demand was acceptably high in the 50s, however.

[–]fetusxfajita[S] 0 points1 point ago

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well yeah, that was pretty much the beginning of typography having a place in design, instead of just being text to explain photos.

[–]biggerthancheeses 2 points3 points ago

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You can get degress in typography? This world is going to helvetica in a handbaskerville.

[–]fetusxfajita[S] 0 points1 point ago

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I never thought i would hear a typography joke, what kind of times new roman are we living in?

[–]flyersfan018 1 point2 points ago

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WHAT KIND OF COOKIES? For science..

[–]fetusxfajita[S] 0 points1 point ago

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[–]modeliste 2 points3 points ago

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Semiotics. He was studying the history of the common trope about a protagonist with a promising future who has it all taken away on a whim due to addiction.

[–]totosushi 1 point2 points ago

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Because he'll suck dick for cookies.

But that's just me. You could be right, after all.

[–]Naeddyr 3 points4 points ago

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I think you clicked the wrong reply there.

[–]redleader 1 point2 points ago

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If it's in any of those, he'd end up on the street anyway.

[–]mxman991 67 points68 points ago

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Cookies, Not even once

[–]GI-Jose 21 points22 points ago

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Cookies is a helluva drug.

[–]darkhorseguns 5 points6 points ago

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He hasn't even hit the low point yet. He's going to kill himself once he moves on to pastries.

[–]joshjje 9 points10 points ago

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Two words. Cookie Dough.

[–]IMasturbateToMyself 7 points8 points ago

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You mean Nutella.

[–]darkhorseguns 1 point2 points ago

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Drat! Yes.

[–]Jayem163 0 points1 point ago

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[–]zeroes0 7 points8 points ago

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You take one hit, pretty soon you're giving BJ's on a street with the homeless that live in a trashcan with giant birds walking around you...

[–]butterflyhigh 0 points1 point ago

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Cookies need love like everything does.

[–]knumbknuts 8 points9 points ago

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Similar thing happened to Jim on "Taxi."

[–]Gettingbetter 2 points3 points ago

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My thoughts exactly.

Edit: Holy crap, is that Tom Hanks?

[–]elitemrp 1 point2 points ago

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Awesome episode.

[–]the_goat_boy 95 points96 points ago

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I realize that this is a joke and we're supposed to laugh, but addiction to cookies is a serious disease. The Cookie Monster had so much potential. He was gonna head his father's law firm someday. But because he was enabled - because we enabled his addiction - he reached rock bottom, prostituted himself to rich Japanese businessmen and later died of AIDS on the streets of Calcutta.

[–]sirberus 22 points23 points ago

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I didn't even realize this was trying to be a joke.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]orange_jooze 11 points12 points ago

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Bitch, I live in a trash can!

[–]simmias 0 points1 point ago

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Rucka?

[–]sirberus -1 points0 points ago

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I'm actually convinced that the artist either (a) is mixing up their memories of Cookie Monster with Oscar the Grouch... or (b) they saw a similar oscar the grouch comic and thought they could pull off a similar one. It's so irrelevant to the character though that it doesn't work for me. shrug

[–]jonnie5 9 points10 points ago

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His name was Cookie Monster for godsakes... it's like naming your daughter Chandler and being surprised when she becomes a stripper.

[–]TheLaughing_Man 8 points9 points ago

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Actually the cookie monsters name was Sid. Source

[–]heylookoverthere 4 points5 points ago

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He wasn't always like this. He got hooked on cookies as a child, and it was his addiction that made him a monster.

[–]JMV290 1 point2 points ago

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Tom Waits?

[–]heylookoverthere 0 points1 point ago

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[–]tallerThanYouAre 1 point2 points ago

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TIL Cookie Monster invented "Om nom nom"

[–]notjawn 5 points6 points ago

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.. you don't have to do a dissertation for your JD.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

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No, he's clean now. Well, he's off cookies. Replacing one addiction with another is not an effective method to stay sober.

[–]UlrichVonLichtenstei 6 points7 points ago

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Huh. That's surprisingly similar to how I ended up living on the street.

[–]UlrichVonLichtenstei 5 points6 points ago

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Except it wasn't cookies, it was heroin.

[–]UlrichVonLichtenstei 6 points7 points ago

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Also, I'm more pinkish than blue.

[–]youareacompletemoron 2 points3 points ago

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Heroin-laced cookies

[–]Onsalefor10cents 5 points6 points ago

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Pepperidge farm remembers. 90% increase in profits

[–]imgur-mirror-bot 8 points9 points ago

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[–]stprockin 1 point2 points ago

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[–]Ur_Highness 1 point2 points ago

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Anyone remember that Family Guy episode....

[–]XtianDK 0 points1 point ago

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[–]Ur_Highness 0 points1 point ago

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Yup

[–]wazzel2u 0 points1 point ago

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[–]adaminc 1 point2 points ago

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[–]Arcon1337 1 point2 points ago

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My sister does cookies. She even deals in them around the neighbourhood. I can't believe what she and her crew, the Brownies, have done to this town.

[–]kellio143506 1 point2 points ago

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Everybody knows Cookie Monster doesn't live on the street. His home is in the apartment building numbered 1,2,3. Gordon, Susan, Bert and Ernie live there too. You're thinking of Oscar...

[–]InfamyDeferred 1 point2 points ago

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At least he got his cookie master's degree first.

[–]bfodder 4 points5 points ago

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Shouldn't he be teaching about the letter C for cookies?

[–]enemaofevil 21 points22 points ago

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He'll be sucking the letter C for cookies

[–]Osiris32 -1 points0 points ago

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Cookie Monster is played by Bob Saget?

[–]fetusxfajita[S] 3 points4 points ago

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A for addiction

[–]royalewihcheese 1 point2 points ago

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Why is the hand white? Why? Shouldn't it be another Cookie Monster giving him the cookie? What are you implying, huh? I knew it, implying that The Man wants to keep the Cookie Monster down. Or that The Man knows the cookie's power, but is immune to its destructive power.

THE MAN WANTS TO SEE COOKIE MONSTER SUCCEED DAMNIT

[–]fetusxfajita[S] 9 points10 points ago

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the us government created cookies and distributed them to the inner city to keep the blue man down

[–]officer_pupp 1 point2 points ago

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reddit would not like this cartoon if it were well drawn. love that crappy, DIY aesthetic

[–]Hamstadam 1 point2 points ago

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It was the CIA, bringing cookies into the inner-city.

[–]Russ91 0 points1 point ago

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S is for Sex.

[–]ZeeHanzenShwanz 0 points1 point ago

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studies show that cookies, are a gateway snack.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]tallerThanYouAre 1 point2 points ago

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You know you ate a cookie after posting that

[–]somesthetic 0 points1 point ago

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Dr Cookies eats a well rounded diet of fruits, vegetables and grains.

[–]Paid_Spokesperson 0 points1 point ago

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"a cookie is a sometimes food..." <-- from sad, recent PSA Cookie had to make as part of his rehab plan

[–]zieren2 0 points1 point ago

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The first hit is always free...

[–]inkyness 0 points1 point ago

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S is for shame ):

[–]SaysVerbs 0 points1 point ago

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Was.

[–]tallerThanYouAre 0 points1 point ago

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Now I can't see straight I'm laughing so hard.

[–]wazzel2u 0 points1 point ago

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[–]HighHemplar 0 points1 point ago

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I don't like the message this sends about people who eat cookies. I've been a cookie eater for decades and I'm still able to maintain a normal lifestyle.

[–]FrancisPR7 0 points1 point ago

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Reference to Online Gamer?!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Funny, but incorrect. His name was Sid, and he's been doing cookies since he was very young. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ji2z4GqUSd8

[–]BigDogSpeaks 0 points1 point ago

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where the hell did you find this?

[–]mikel3030 0 points1 point ago

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one of the funniest thing i have seen on reddit

[–]chasingshadows 0 points1 point ago

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hahaha this is absolutely hilarious

[–]knut01 -1 points0 points ago

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ಠ_ಠ

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

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simpsons did it

[–]silvorgold 0 points1 point ago

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I thought it was Family Guy

[–]kindnessoffensive -1 points0 points ago

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It was. Probably my favorite Family Guy moment ever.

[–]arrowheadt -1 points0 points ago

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Lachrymose is to dyspeptic as ebullient is to ... effervescent! All right Harvard, here I come!

[–]menolikey -2 points-1 points ago

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simpsons rip off.

[–]wazzel2u 3 points4 points ago

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[–]Panicatthedildo -3 points-2 points ago

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His specialty: Vodka cookies. Now with extra vodka.

[–]fetusxfajita[S] 2 points3 points ago

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[–]Panicatthedildo -1 points0 points ago

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Ngh, I just came. (Seriously, I WILL make those. And then just lay around and bask in the glory.)

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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if you replace half the water with vodka in your fav pie crust recipe it turns out extra flaky

[–]fetusxfajita[S] 0 points1 point ago

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[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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didnt work

[–]fetusxfajita[S] 0 points1 point ago

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yeah it did

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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is this some error message joke that's going over my head? What do you see when you click on this link?