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top 200 commentsshow all 445

[–]Rajvosa 835 points836 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]dafragsta 20 points21 points ago

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Cry havoc!

[–]faceny 1 point2 points ago

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and let slip the dogs of war.

[–]JaseAndrews 2 points3 points ago

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This makes me feel so conflicted.

[–]toomuchhippo 1 point2 points ago

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He looks like an Asian parade dragon...

[–]TheSpiffySpaceman 20 points21 points ago

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Really, really, really not enough upvotes

[–]TheSpiffySpaceman -1 points0 points ago

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written when it only had 20 upvotes

[–]Rajvosa 1 point2 points ago

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Well, i wasn't expecting this many upvotes at all! :O (none actually)

[–]PlutoNash 1 point2 points ago

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Amount of upvotes at time of writing is irrelevant. MOAR UPVOTES!!!

[–]MrMackay 1 point2 points ago

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win on so many levels

[–]TMox 1 point2 points ago

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Thank you very much. This make life worth living again.

[–]SuperSix 1 point2 points ago

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Well done.

[–]EmotionalMillionaire[S] 352 points353 points ago*

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[–]wooljay 343 points344 points ago

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I'd like to think he's scarred by his time on the force, and now sees crime everywhere. Especially in leaves. Wheels McDog - keeping the streets clean - especially in Autumn

[–]hazbaz 313 points314 points ago

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"You're a loose cannon, McDog! Keep this up and you'll never bark in this town again!"

[–]wooljay 205 points206 points ago

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He needs a wise cracking black lab for a partner. "Wheels yo' crazier than my first wife!"

[–]NiiruNoRidozu 69 points70 points ago

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Re: That picture.

I see a scene where a dog based crime has happened. Perhaps a murder in a bone factory. (Yes, in dog world, bones are manufactured by machines in factories.)

Anyone, upon finding the body, the black Labrador is all like:

"Perhaps the murdered decided to..."

Dog goggles

"...Give the dog a bone!"

HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!

(The proceeding scene is taken from CSI: Dogland.)

[–]Deddan 30 points31 points ago

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Doggles

FTFY

[–]toomuchtime11 38 points39 points ago

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Voiced by Tracy Morgan

[–]dafragsta 2 points3 points ago

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Good is what Superman does. You did well, son!

[–]Hands0L0 1 point2 points ago

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Coming to theaters this Summer.

[–]Punkndrublic 1 point2 points ago

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For some reason Tracy Morgan is my default "sassy black lab sidekick" voice.

[–]Nuggetry 1 point2 points ago

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It's funny/sad because Hollywood has cranked out dog-related movies that are stupider than the one you guys are describing. I would actually go see this one.

[–][deleted] 20 points21 points ago

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"Turn in your leash and your red bouncing ball"

[–]rataxes11 9 points10 points ago

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"Hi Lisa! I'm McWheels the crime dog! Help me take a bite out of crime!"

[–]Disguising 3 points4 points ago

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[–]KillerLawnGnome 64 points65 points ago

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[–]Hamster536 13 points14 points ago

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Maybe he has a good health plan. He probably paid many bones towards. Look at the other dog so envious.

[–]desconectado 3 points4 points ago

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He is more like, "What the fuck man?"

[–]randoof 15 points16 points ago

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this is exactly how my springer sits and she has real problems with her rear legs, looks like I might be building her one of these supports in the future

[–]onefingerattack 13 points14 points ago

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I was wondering what the story behind this was. Now that I know, I'm pretty sure there will be 1000+ robocop/robodog comparisons between now and lunch time.

[–]geschtonkenflapped 1 point2 points ago

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Jokes on you, lunchtime is already over for more than one hour here. *European trolol

[–]onefingerattack 1 point2 points ago

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Me saying that was more of a preventative measure. You can thank me later.

[–]88scythe 10 points11 points ago

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Anyone else read "retarded police dog"?

I thought "makes sense" and then read again and then it hit me.

[–]Round_Pokey_Penguins 6 points7 points ago

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Max's buddy Stanley enjoys the fun on the sidelines- that tender face seems to radiate joy and love watching Max zip around on his happy wheels - wwwhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!

[–]l2azor 6 points7 points ago

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I'm guessing he was three days to retirement before the accident.

[–]diggduke 4 points5 points ago

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Cue Ironside theme song . . . .

[–]MrBean123 4 points5 points ago

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Who do you think you are calling a police dog retired! Lots of dogs are retired, it's not their fault, they were born without oxygen!!!

[–]fonster_mox 9 points10 points ago

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That's cool.

I'm totally not tearing up here.

No way.

[–]Hamster536 4 points5 points ago*

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Here is a tissue for your non tearing eyes.

[–]aedinius 17 points18 points ago

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Retired police dog. Ex-would imply being kicked out, not (medically or otherwise) retired. It's an honor thing.

[–]EmotionalMillionaire[S] 29 points30 points ago

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Woops apologies, English is not my first language.

Fixed!

[–]gfense 43 points44 points ago

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English is my first language, and I wouldn't have distinguished a difference either.

[–][deleted] 19 points20 points ago

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A police dog "kicked out"? I can just imagine the scenario..

Human Resources: We cannot disclose the primary reason in which Fido was kicked off of the squad, but we can say that he has been charged with sexual harassment towards another female officer. He has been caught humping her leg on numerous occasions. Please, no more questions for today."

[–]lankira 61 points62 points ago*

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I grew up with a German Shepherd, Apollo, that had been kicked out of the doggy police academy. He had a floppy ear, and they said he "didn't look ferocious enough". Apollo was the best dog ever, but his first year and a half sucked.

He got kicked out of doggy police academy and was given to a retired cop who kept him in a cage, and beat Apollo if he peed in the cage, which was daily (the cop only let him out once per day). The retired cop knew a military family who wanted to have a dog, so he gave Apollo to the family. Apollo was happy there, and let the family's two-year-old sit on his back and try to steer him with his ears. The retired cop had told the family that if they couldn't take Apollo with them when they moved, they should give the dog back. Knowing how he was treated with the retired cop, the mom left Apollo at a local animal shelter. Apollo was there so long that, to make room, he was labeled "undesirable", and slated for euthanasia. Less than a week before his scheduled euthanization, my family adopted Apollo. He was about 18 months old.

Apollo passed away four years ago this month. He was just a few weeks shy of turning 14. Apollo was a gentle soul until the day he died. When he reached his old age, Apollo still wanted to do the same things he did when he was younger, like playing fetch. But, while he would have played ball until the thrower's arm fell off when he was young, he'd only go for three or four throws. No matter his age, though, if one of us was upset, Apollo would walk over to us, put his head in our lap, and give us this look of "pet me, it'll make you feel better".

Gah....I'm sorry I wrote so much. I didn't mean to. I just miss my buddy.

TL;DR: I grew up with a German Shepherd who got kicked out of the puppy police academy because of a floppy ear that made him look "not ferocious enough". He was the best dog ever, but had a crappy first 18 months.

EDIT: For those assuming this story is false, everything I know about Apollo's life before my family was told to me by my parents, who had been told by the mom from the previous family. Previous family's mom asked the animal shelter to give her contact information to the family that adopted Apollo so that she would know he's in a safe place. His previous family lived next door to the retired cop, and, I'd imagine, had some idea of how often they saw the dog in their neighbor's yard. I was 7 when we adopted Apollo, so my memory may not be 100% clear. I did not say anything in this post about his life before my family that I do not remember coming straight from my parents' mouths. That's not to say my parents were necessarily telling the full truth, but, as far as I know, the truth is what I've told you.

EDIT2: Picture, by request.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

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I'm so sorry to hear that. He sounded like a great friend and companion. It sounded like his life with your family far exceeded any life that he would have had with the Police Academy. Kudos to you!

[–]lankira 7 points8 points ago

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He really was the best dog ever. For both my sister and me, he was the one stable thing in our family. He helped us get through our parents' divorce and stayed with us when we were ill or home alone. With my mom or dad's order to "Stay with the girls, Apollo. Watch the girls," even if he wanted to follow my parents, he'd sit his butt right down and give them this determined look of "yes, sir/ma'am."

[–]NYManc 1 point2 points ago

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Such a beautiful story. I would love to adopt a German shepherd but having two daschunds are a bit full.

[–]ofsinope 1 point2 points ago

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IA report: Despite repeated entreaties to stop eating the cat food, Det. Fido has persisted in this anti-social behavior. He responded with insubordination and growls when ordered to desist eating cat food by his commanding officer. Recommend Det. Fido be demoted to Officer and given two weeks leave without pay.

[–]InvisibleManiac 1 point2 points ago

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YOU'RE A LOOSE CANNON McROVER! I can't have you out there tearing up half the city I'm trying to protect! Give me your badge and your kong. BADGE AND KONG! ON MY DESK! NOW!

[–]Eulachon 136 points137 points ago

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This is probably the sweetest thing on the internet right now. Back off, starving African children, I want this dog, NOW.

[–][deleted] 81 points82 points ago

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You think.. starving African kids.. are sweet?

[–]marathi_mulga 212 points213 points ago

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nopes, they just taste like regular kids.

[–]The_BT 88 points89 points ago

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African kids all the taste - none of the calories

[–]mentallyvexed 33 points34 points ago

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they're the energy bars of children

[–]brysoncorley 6 points7 points ago

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more like the celery, it takes more calories to digest them than they give you

[–]moffett_sam 18 points19 points ago

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"Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew."

[–]MojoPriest 5 points6 points ago

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nopes, definitely drier.

[–]catfightonahotdog 2 points3 points ago

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Sweet like chocolate.

[–]lampzilla 1 point2 points ago

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That song is really fitting right now.

[–]hngryhngryhippo 0 points1 point ago

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As candy.

[–]Newshoe 33 points34 points ago

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Doggy Xavier's weakness: Leaves

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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I also love leaves, they are my weakness too! But my boss refuses to grant them.

[–]InitiallyAnAsshole 1 point2 points ago

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Half machine, half dog, half wit...

[–]noodled 32 points33 points ago

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So does this guy

[–]cigerect 1 point2 points ago

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Is it just me, or is that dog really buff?

[–]Mostly42Harmless 585 points586 points ago

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He wheely does.

[–]JapaneseEmoticon 62 points63 points ago

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O(≧∇≦)O

[–]Kujata 103 points104 points ago

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Looks like a bird stuggling to take a shit

[–]EXMarten 27 points28 points ago

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Ruined.

[–]mystikraven 95 points96 points ago

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You have me rolling on the floor with laughter.

[–]steinman17 79 points80 points ago

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Leaf it to the dog to make us all smile.

[–]babyhead 24 points25 points ago

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I poodle ittle bit.

[–]chimpwithalimp 50 points51 points ago

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If someone can get a similar picture with Stephen Hawking, we all win.

[–]Ekabz 2 points3 points ago

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Except Stephen Hawking would not be capable of showing that amount of joy.

You would just see a slightly smirking Hawking rolling in to a pile of leaves.

[–]JohnnyCashed 14 points15 points ago

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Does anyone else see a little Falcor from the NeverEnding Story?

[–]sexualSAVANT 36 points37 points ago

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It's like the dog from the Neverending Story but with wheels and shit.

[–]Zygapophysial 16 points17 points ago

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That was supposedly a dragon... But yeah, jus like him!

[–]sexualSAVANT 13 points14 points ago

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A fucking dragon? My entire childhood was a lie!

[–]CptHair 1 point2 points ago

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lol. I thought so too for a long time. Then I figured, they were flying and talking, and come to think of it, it was a bit huge for a dog.

[–]twistworld 4 points5 points ago

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[–]Irish-Ink 1 point2 points ago

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I thought it was Valcor for about a decade. I was 10, what did I know?

[–]squishlefunke 1 point2 points ago

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My thought when I saw the pic was he looked very much like an asian dragon. Head pose and everything.

[–]Mikeyjo 7 points8 points ago

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FAAAALLLCOOOORRR!!!!!

[–]haiku_robot 2 points3 points ago

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It's like the dog from 
the Neverending Story 
but with wheels and shit.

[–]strallweat 25 points26 points ago

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I think we know who's responsible. http://i.imgur.com/RI2i3.jpg

[–]Toomuchconfusion 54 points55 points ago

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And painkillers.

[–]BaChNiEr 9 points10 points ago

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That's a real dog thing to say.

[–]Kenitzka 4 points5 points ago

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It would be hard not to woof them down with a condition like his.

[–]aintevenmadbrah 6 points7 points ago

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I don't know, it might be a little ruff on his throat

[–]string97bean 6 points7 points ago

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I think after a brief paws he would be fine

[–]CrexisNX 0 points1 point ago

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He's too tough to turn tail so easily.

[–]Unrelated_Gif 6 points7 points ago

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[–]AdmiralBillAdama 12 points13 points ago

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[–]AFineWayToDie 4 points5 points ago

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When I think of stitched-flesh abominations whose twisted forms and eternal sufferings serve only as an amusement to depraved individuals such as myself, I think of Cyriak.

[–]Toomuchconfusion 1 point2 points ago

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Yaaaay LSD!

[–]koakreeper 46 points47 points ago

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Gentlemen, we can rebuild him we have the technology

[–]twistworld 72 points73 points ago

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[–]marquizzo 14 points15 points ago

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Sh-nh-nh-nh-nh-nhnhnhnhnhnh

[–]soralan 12 points13 points ago

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That is one happy looking dog.

[–]Antka 8 points9 points ago

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That's not what people call me when I make that expression..

[–]m0zzie 6 points7 points ago

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Well maybe if you weren't violently fapping at the same time..

[–]Antka 1 point2 points ago

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Easier said then done..

[–]XtortionBear 9 points10 points ago

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Does he look like a Chinese dragon to anyone else?

[–]Radico87 5 points6 points ago

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They see me rollin', they hatin'.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points ago

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Fine. Have your damn karma.

[–]Qweef 9 points10 points ago

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This is how I look when I jog.

[–]Vesuvias 2 points3 points ago

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It's a real life Lil' Brudder!!!

[–]blacknwhitelitebrite 2 points3 points ago

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i can make it on my own!

[–]IAmMelonLord 1 point2 points ago

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Not enough upvotes for this.

Also, that just made me laugh and sad at the same time.

[–]GalacticPenguin 7 points8 points ago

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Good to see some love on Reddit for Springer Spaniels, they really can look so adorably retarded at times.

[–]actually_spider_link 45 points46 points ago

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Aww he's so cute! Reminds me of my neighbors dog when I rake up all my leaves, too

[–]absidell 26 points27 points ago

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EVERY SINGLE TIME

[–]Norther 8 points9 points ago

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I downvoted, but then I felt bad, so I upvoted. Kudos.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points ago

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This comment made me hit my wife.

[–]REDDITvTIDDER 4 points5 points ago

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FOOL ME ONCE: SHAME ON YOU FOOL ME TWICE: SHAME ON ME FOOL ME WITH SPIDERS 8 THOUSAND TIMES: PRICELESS

[–]ForestFairy 1 point2 points ago

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This spider guy is an imposter! GET HIM!

[–]sotheniderped 1 point2 points ago

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Holy smokes, did not expect spiders. How many accounts could there be doing this?

[–]snazzypenguin 1 point2 points ago

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fucking impostor.

[–]chuckzer0 2 points3 points ago

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I just adopted a pet with a disability, was this close to adopting a wheel chair dog... holy moly were they awesome! Upvotes for you!

[–]OldManPsylus 2 points3 points ago

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Anyone else see Sephiroth riding the dog? O.o

[–]triviaqueen 2 points3 points ago

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I had a dog who was hit by a car, left paralyzed from the waist down due to a spinal injury, and who ran full tilt through life with a cart like this for the next nine years. Where there's a wheel, there's a way!

[–]G-razer 4 points5 points ago

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There was a dog where I grew up with no rear end, strapped to a small homemade board and wheels. He was allowed to play in the street all day with the other neighbourhood dogs and didn't seem at all put out as he raced around, banging up and down kerbs, sometimes getting caught on things.

People whose first choice is to put a lame dog down have not exhausted all options.

[–]funkgerm 2 points3 points ago

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The dog was... missing his ass? Like... no hind legs or asshole or anything? I'm just trying to picture this guy.

[–]CircumcisedSpine 5 points6 points ago

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Chariots of derp.

[–]Wisdom_Bro 15 points16 points ago

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I smell a frontpager

[–]thenoof 16 points17 points ago

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Disabled dog, having fun? Go straight to the front page.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points ago

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Do pass go, do collect 2000 points.

[–]reimburst 2 points3 points ago

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Dog, pass go. Dog, collect 2000 points.

[–]hazmatattack 2 points3 points ago

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Bro...that's like, truly wise man. Let's surf our way on over to frontpage status bro-ham.

[–]AmIDoinThisRite 3 points4 points ago

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FUCK BITCHES, THE LEAVES ARE MINE!

[–]Iliad93 3 points4 points ago

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[–]funkgerm 1 point2 points ago

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More like:

Disregard dog-broads

Acquire foliage

[–]Qweef 6 points7 points ago

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I'm on the fence about getting a dog, this might have made up my mind. Boss.

[–]mnells 1 point2 points ago

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This just made my day a little better. Who the fuck cares if your back legs are fucked up? PLAY IN THE FUCKING LEAVES.

[–]FLX 1 point2 points ago

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I call thee...Ben Hur

[–]omgzface 1 point2 points ago

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I fucking love the title to this!

[–]Cocktronic 1 point2 points ago

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Twas the leaves that took his legs.

[–]aliceinreddit 1 point2 points ago

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he looks like the lucky dragon from the never ending story

[–]imogeee 1 point2 points ago

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[–]dasmi3 1 point2 points ago

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EmotionalMillionaire can have all my emotions

[–]DankasaurusRX 1 point2 points ago

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Autobots attack

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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That dog needs to upgrade them rims.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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I will never be this happy...

[–]LiuKangWins 1 point2 points ago

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I LOVE LAMP.

[–]phorkor 1 point2 points ago

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A happy dog is a happy dog no matter what has happened to it in the past. It would be amazing if humans had their resilience.

[–]ddshroom 1 point2 points ago

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Some do.

[–]Derbl 1 point2 points ago

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Them's kinda low-budget bionics for an emotional millionaire!

He is a retired police dog by the way

[–]Rainbowarch 1 point2 points ago

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Redditors... I'm begging you to help this man to do more of this. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M4giaORFP5M How do I get this on the front page?

[–]SteveBloke 1 point2 points ago

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He gets RESULTS you stupid boss!

[–]reticulatedspline 1 point2 points ago

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It blows my mind that 8,600 people so far have disliked this enough to downvote it.

[–]Bleach-Free 1 point2 points ago

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Holy shit! It's Falcor in dog form!!

[–]james_o 1 point2 points ago

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I FUCKING HATE LEAVES

[–]nizer20 1 point2 points ago

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he looks super happy

[–]hyperfried 1 point2 points ago

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I also enjoy cocaine.

[–]jasonbeee 1 point2 points ago

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Poor dog

[–]rredsallad 1 point2 points ago

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thanks for getting me in trouble in my english class for laughing... asshole

[–]RevWaldo 1 point2 points ago

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British doggie has universal healthcare.

American doggie, on the other hand...

[–]CAPTJTK 1 point2 points ago

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17,462 up votes 15,346 down votes at time of post. I don't see how anyone can downvote this.

[–]iambutternumber 4 points5 points ago

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It's given him a new leash of life

[–]soralan 7 points8 points ago

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Its a tail with a happy ending.

[–]Mookiewook 4 points5 points ago

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Makes you just paws for awhile and smile eh?

[–]chimpwithalimp 1 point2 points ago

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Where's that "Nam was hell" flashback dog video when we need it most

Edit - ah yes: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yLMvFJ4FWU

[–]Kavec 0 points1 point ago

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Falcore?...

[–]richardjohn 1 point2 points ago

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I need a wallpaper sized version of this.

[–]hias 1 point2 points ago

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He looks like Fuchur from the Neverending Story. Correction before posting: TIL that Fuchur is called Falkor in the english version of the movie =)

[–]honeydarling 1 point2 points ago

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BITE ALL THE LEAVES!

[–]izszm 0 points1 point ago

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This is too much.

[–]DanielClamentine 0 points1 point ago

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Everyone sympathy upvotes for the crippled dog

[–]powerfulbuttblaster 0 points1 point ago

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God damn leafers!

[–]brilliantNumberOne 0 points1 point ago

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Yo, that dog got wheels.

[–]powerpants 0 points1 point ago

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[–]BearGryllsGrillsBear 0 points1 point ago

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YER A LUCKDRAGON, HARRY

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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He's a cyborg!

[–]reckl3ss 0 points1 point ago

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My dog chases leaves like crazy. I hate that when I'm suddenly getting pulled hard as fuck lol.

[–]rhiever 0 points1 point ago

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"Let's kick this into hyper derp!"

[–]JimmyDThing 0 points1 point ago

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This is the exact reason why dogs are the greatest form of life on this planet. They just fucking love life and everything about it. No matter happens to a dog, they can get over it and be overcome with joy at something as simple as leaves.

[–]Drinkmoreyuengling 0 points1 point ago

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Did the gladiator fall off?

[–]terranaut_v2 0 points1 point ago

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My puppy is experiencing her first Fall now... Chasing moving leaves!

[–]ihaverights2 0 points1 point ago

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I just laughed so hard I cried. Thank you.

[–]JRockPSU 0 points1 point ago

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The only thing that would make this better is if there were cartoon burnout smoke clouds coming out from the bottom of the wheels.

[–]radiotyler 0 points1 point ago

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I'm a luck dragon!

[–]freeeedom 0 points1 point ago

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Anyone care to shoop this into a dragon flying through the autumn trees?

[–]TheAmazingOctopus 0 points1 point ago

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I wish this image was a video. I wanna see him playing in the leaves!

[–]TheMeIWarnedYouAbout 0 points1 point ago

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Immediately desktop background'ed.

[–]dontaxmebro 0 points1 point ago

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I dont always upvote but when I do its for a disabled dog.

[–]ROK247 0 points1 point ago

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he's more machine than dog now, twisted and evil...

[–]randomnerd79 0 points1 point ago

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Oh Little Brodda! The heart of a champion!

[–]roman_urban 0 points1 point ago

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Perhaps it's the most optimistic picture I've ever seen.

[–]Exducer 0 points1 point ago

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And being cyborg!

[–]fucking_leverpostej 0 points1 point ago

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That's fucking Falkor.

[–]efrank02 0 points1 point ago

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I AM FUCKING TERRIFIED OF LEAVES

[–]Snackadoodlepop 0 points1 point ago

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Nice wheels dude.

[–]calaca 0 points1 point ago

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beautiful dog, i love his facial expression, so much happiness

[–]STJRedstorm 0 points1 point ago

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This is a perfect storm for manic up voting

[–]USB_everything 0 points1 point ago

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Whoa mad frolic