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1453
1454

How to always win a fight. (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by veckrot

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all 152 comments
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[–]skeener 97 points98 points ago

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Taken from this video

[–]zonker1984 24 points25 points ago

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That was amazing. I love absurdism.

[–]Legoandsprit 12 points13 points ago

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I'M NAKED!

[–]CtrlShift7 8 points9 points ago

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What the everloving fuck was that?

THAT WAS AWESOME!

[–]khanfusion 4 points5 points ago

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Leda: Former Atheist.

[–]PandaGoggles 108 points109 points ago

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This is how I apply my beard every morning

[–]BoiledEggs 35 points36 points ago

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Can I help you with it tomorrow?

[–]snoaj 50 points51 points ago

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Tomorrow is a pubes day too.

[–]BoiledEggs 19 points20 points ago

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Freaky FridaAaAyyy

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points ago

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Friiiiiedegg, friiiiedegg

[–]BoiledEggs 8 points9 points ago

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That will haunt my dreams.

[–]TexasWithADollarsign 1 point2 points ago

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FUN FUN FUN FUN

[–]edumacation_nation 1 point2 points ago

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I just read everything on the internet about Rebecca Black. Thanks for that.

[–]snoaj -5 points-4 points ago

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I don't know what that means. But I laughed anyways.

[–]Backupusername 3 points4 points ago

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Friiday, Friiday, gotta pube-slap on Friiday.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

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....and my ax?

[–]SeeEmTrollin 1 point2 points ago

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e

[–]snoaj 0 points1 point ago

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Sure, why not.

[–]PandaGoggles 3 points4 points ago

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Sure, but aim carefully, I don't want my eyebrows to explode

[–]Lion-O_of_Thundera 3 points4 points ago

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Slap-on. Shave-off.

[–]handofthrawn 100 points101 points ago

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I'd be willing to take the slap if I got a sweet beard out of it.

[–]haiku_robot 76 points77 points ago

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I'd be willing to 
take the slap if I got a 
sweet beard out of it.

[–]iKevFtw 14 points15 points ago

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I wish I was an

amazing haiku robot

like this guy right here.

[–]taco_tuesdays 12 points13 points ago

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Is it really a

robot, or is it just some

guy who likes haikus?

[–]haiku_robot 140 points141 points ago

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I am a robot
beep boop bop

[–]MundaneHymn 7 points8 points ago

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Fucking Brilliant.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]sicinfit 1 point2 points ago

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Standing ovation.

[–]Etab 8 points9 points ago*

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There's a whole army of them.

[–]taco_tuesdays 5 points6 points ago

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Dear God.

[–]Hyperwyrm 1 point2 points ago*

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Haiku bot

Syllabic structure

Not much else

(*EDIT: OK, I only just noticed "I am a robot // Beep boop bop", that one was worth it XD)

[–]andytuba 2 points3 points ago

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3/5/3?

[–]Hyperwyrm 4 points5 points ago

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Yeah. "Not a haiku!!", I hear the criticism already XD;

My bad. When I hear the word "haiku" in this context, I don't get the image that people are writing an already well-established English-language form of poetry of 5-7-5 syllables.

Instead, I get the image that people are writing an English version of the Japanese concept of 俳句(haiku) except with the cut and kigo not included.

My preferred way of doing that -- of translating that Japanese poetic structure across to English -- is 3-5-3 syllables (not my invention btw), which does a much better job than 5-7-5 syllables at reflecting the amount of information you can fit into a Japanese haiku/senryuu (English has lots of diphthongs etc. that increase the information content per syllable).

I should probably realize that rigid 5-7-5 is an accepted poetic form called haiku, which is independent of the concept of 俳句, and not try to bring the latter into the former. >_>;

[–]bfhancock -1 points0 points ago

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You said diphthong...

[–]IDlOT 1 point2 points ago

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hooooooooooooly shit!

[–]Pollo_Diablo 71 points72 points ago

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If you strike me down, my beard shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine

[–]mrpotatoes 21 points22 points ago

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If you strike me down 2 more beards will take my place

[–]Albrecht_Letao 1 point2 points ago

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Greg Pak is writing a HYDRA series now?

[–]Howisdiscool 0 points1 point ago

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Ugh, beard split ends.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Nimbal 20 points21 points ago

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A reliable, but traumatizing way to protect an innocent from pedobear.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points ago

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Oh... Wow. Kids grow up fast nowadays. pedo-shuffles away

[–]anotherDocObVious 7 points8 points ago

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Visualizing the outcome: ಠ_ಠ

[–]Stregano 0 points1 point ago

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It's a dick punch!

[–]cralledode 0 points1 point ago

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aka puberty

oof

[–][deleted] 299 points300 points ago

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Previously on...

Was this match inaccurate? Not even close?

[–]Don_Andy 39 points40 points ago

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I kind of wonder if all these bots are programmed to just upvote each other.

[–]XWUWTR 104 points105 points ago

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Ha, ha, that's funny

Don_Andy.

Have an upvote for

humorous statement(s).

[–]SinisterKid 13 points14 points ago

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I see what you did there XWUWTR, user of Reddit for 7 months.

[–]Punkndrublic 13 points14 points ago

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counts on fingers

The math checks out. HE'S A BOT, GET HIM!

[–]mStank 2 points3 points ago

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I wanna see it done with a bush. Wham bam! Right in the clam!

[–]ceogoku -4 points-3 points ago

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I downvote all bots... and I never win.

[–]eyecite 51 points52 points ago

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Fuck to the yes. Is this new?

[–]brownboy13 3 points4 points ago

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Seems like it. Imagebot was a similar one that's been around for a few weeks.

[–]eyecite 2 points3 points ago

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ah. its profile says it's been a redditor for 22 hours.

[–]Xelopheris 4 points5 points ago

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Except the previous posting was to /r/gifs, a very low population subreddit compared to /r/pics

[–]kaptinkracker 2 points3 points ago

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OP probably deleted and reposted it because it wasn't getting attention/upvotes.

[–]seewhatididthere 2 points3 points ago

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I read "Previously on..." in a voice as if this were an episodic television show. I watch too much TV.

[–]andytuba 0 points1 point ago

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That's the Joke, now at 8pm Tuesdays (7pm Central)!

[–]ZeroShift -2 points-1 points ago

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Thank you KarmaDecay-Bot.

Now I know which post to actually upvote.

[–]Oldforkeye 14 points15 points ago

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Going to need this gif in reverse asap. The hand giveth, and the hand taketh away.

[–]jimcando 20 points21 points ago

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Here ya go

[–]Leaflock 13 points14 points ago

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In reverse it's like the "Wave Shave"

[–]BunchOfNumbers145236 3 points4 points ago

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"Oh hey check out my sweet beard...wait what are you doing? no...NO! I'm stuck! NOOOO!!" rip "I'm going to eat your children."

[–]borgros 1 point2 points ago

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If only we could get sound with it also

[–]Lion-O_of_Thundera 1 point2 points ago

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It was amazing before. Now it is miraculous and magical.

[–]plainOldFool 2 points3 points ago

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How about both?

[–]deighv 1 point2 points ago

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I think that would be how to win a fight. I mean, if someone were beardless and you gave them a beard, they just won. If you take someone's beard away, that's a hard loss.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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Is this Double The Fist? Because if it is, you earn my eternal love.

[–]HeartfeltAnalogy 2 points3 points ago

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Side project. Doug and a lot of the Fist crew do weird video editing stuff as their jobs / in their spare time.

[–]DieRad 4 points5 points ago

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Weirdly enough, I filmed this and my mate Rob was the dude slapping Doug.

Bayne's a buddy of mine, i actually make a really embarassing cameo on season 2 of fist.

Doug is still making crazy shit, here is one of his latest: http://vimeo.com/29901442

Oh, he also writes oglaf.

[–]5rob 6 points7 points ago

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Hey, that's my arm!

Here's the rest of the video.

I started off soft, but he kept telling me to make it look real. My hand started to hurt around the 8th take.

[–]Renkie 4 points5 points ago

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Whahaha, beard!

[–]cannex 3 points4 points ago

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This is how I would win most of my court cases for sure.

[–]Poxican 4 points5 points ago

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Does anybody know what this is from?

[–]HeartfeltAnalogy 14 points15 points ago

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It's from a vid called Tiny Legs of Fire; http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iyhzXBo1N98&feature=youtube_gdata_player

[–]j-hermann 0 points1 point ago

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Holy shit, this is great.

[–]michaelzelen 8 points9 points ago*

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The guys name is Doug Bayne, he worked on a show called "Double the Fist", yes that's what it was called, it combined jackass with cheesy-ish special effects, it was on years ago, met him once, really nice guy

First episode of double the fist OK that link won't work, unless your in Australia , sorry about that I didn't know

I searched around and no place has the show, some kid on myspace uploaded some episodes, but somehow they don't have visual and its a black screen (the only way to watch it through there is to download them by various means, but its not in great quality). there are other ways of obtaining this show, how I'll leave that to you, me hearties. but please check this show out, give it a chance and spread it around, it didn't do well on TV and at least it deserves a second chance. thanks for reading

Doug's Vimeo page

[–]sonicoliver 2 points3 points ago

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arrgh, not available outside of Australia! how sucks is that... but revenge for all the times when cool shows were not available IN Australia :)

[–]michaelzelen 0 points1 point ago*

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I'll find another link, this show was wrongfully held for some 3 or more years even after it won an AFI award only to shafted for a bad timeslot and only word of mouth to spread its awesomeness

I'm not letting this one down, episode one is just: fall off a cliff and live and some other shit

[–]andytuba 1 point2 points ago

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Formatting tip: don't put a space between the [display text] (and the url) for links.

[–]michaelzelen 0 points1 point ago

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didn't know that, thanks so much

[–]Samsy 1 point2 points ago

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It's Doug! such an awesome guy, we used to hang out a bit around 16yrs ago when I worked at a comic store that he and his partner sold their comic Platinum Grit to

[–]DigiSmackd 2 points3 points ago

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Nice.

That dude is one of the few who I'd say hands-down looks better with a full-on beard.

He wears that slap well!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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gif with sound anyone?

[–]dixinormous 0 points1 point ago

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I got nothin on this one too. I dont get it. Now i will never know how to win an arguement

[–]ShroudIII 2 points3 points ago

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FUCK OFF.. I can't Believe you... SLAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Holyshit this is a great fuckin beard! Not only was I wrong in our previous confrontation, but I must extend my deepest thanks for this magnificent beard!!!

[–]lordhazzard 1 point2 points ago

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Who is this guy? I've seen him before somewhere....

[–]HeartfeltAnalogy 5 points6 points ago

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Doug Bayne. He'd be recognizable to a lot of Australians for playing Mephisto on the TV series Double The Fist. Awesome guy.

[–]lordhazzard 0 points1 point ago

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Oh crap i just realised that i've met him! at a friends film premiere party

[–]HeartfeltAnalogy 0 points1 point ago

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Nice! He's a cool guy. Was it a horror flick by chance? I think that's the last thing he was working on if I recall correctly.

[–]lordhazzard 1 point2 points ago

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Nah it was a mate's HSC film and he was one of the guests, i had a cool chat with him about the tv/film industry in oz

[–]troymcdavis 1 point2 points ago

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I'm loving the dedication. There's a frame in there where he had only half a beard, making a smooth and appealing transition.

[–]fassaction 1 point2 points ago

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If you watch it in reverse, a guy gets a clean shave from a vicious backhand.....not bad, usually takes me about 15 minutes.

http://reversegif.com/qm1

[–]maxp0wah 1 point2 points ago

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This will be #1 by the end of the day!

[–]vietbond 1 point2 points ago

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Why do I feel like this would be funnier if the guy had a beard first, then had it slapped off?

[–]keikii 1 point2 points ago

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Is this Rodney McKay?

[–]Mitch2025 0 points1 point ago

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Sure is!

[–]Spiderbeard 0 points1 point ago

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Everybody wins!

[–]Exulted 0 points1 point ago

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This made my day.

[–]Mooncoon 0 points1 point ago

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Should have used the glove slap!

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Leaflock 0 points1 point ago

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http://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/lap4w/how_to_always_win_a_fight/c2r5rbh

[–]lol_fps_newbie 0 points1 point ago

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Is there a reason why a lot of imgur posts recently (including this one) have just led me to a blank white page?

[–]beard_ 5 points6 points ago

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There is probably a reason, yes.

[–]Kry05 0 points1 point ago

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Downvoted you for not living up to your handle.

[–]j-hermann 0 points1 point ago

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Hold on just a sec.

BEARDSLAP

Better?

[–]Kry05 1 point2 points ago

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Definitely!!

[–]Really- 0 points1 point ago

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And new internet classic is born

[–]liveryowl 0 points1 point ago

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I'm a fan of the Hitler stash nose flick

[–]soyabstemio 0 points1 point ago

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This could backfire, making your opponent more manly, kill many bear.

[–]NerdBot9000 0 points1 point ago

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If only I could do this in real life.

[–]Harold_Grundelson 0 points1 point ago

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By the beard of Zeus that was awesome!

[–]CHUDS 0 points1 point ago

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That's how Chuck Norris received his powers.

[–]bmw1393 0 points1 point ago

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I thought the amish were a peaceful people.

[–]pretzelzetzel 0 points1 point ago

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I l'ed ol.

[–]hooliganking 0 points1 point ago

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What the hell did I just see?

[–]itisthefirsttime 0 points1 point ago

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I won't slap any ass with that hand

[–]sonicoliver 0 points1 point ago

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This guy is from an Australian show called DOUBLE THE FIST (yes, in capitals) you can even watch it on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/show?p=oKAj2oI4mkc&tracker=show_av

It get's better than beard slap :D love that show!

[–]wraithevolution 0 points1 point ago

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If someone could mod this into a Mortal Combat finisher, my life would be complete.

[–]samtheboy 0 points1 point ago

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Weedle uses beard slap?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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He got slapped by The Most Interesting Man In The World.

[–]iamhusband 0 points1 point ago

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What happens when he masturbates?

[–]Popozuda72 0 points1 point ago

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He looks a little like Dave Dreiwitz from ween (greatest band in the world).

[–]prof9000 0 points1 point ago

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New favorite gif

[–]wbeavis 0 points1 point ago

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At least it wasn't an ass-hair kick.

[–]TheBluePanda 0 points1 point ago

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brb, gonna see if this works on babies.

[–]Kohel 0 points1 point ago

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I wish i could do this to Micheal Jordan in the Hanes commercials to hide his Hitlerstache.

[–]Lier_X_Agerate 0 points1 point ago

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Who won?

[–]agentargoh 0 points1 point ago

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If I could have one super power...

[–]IDlOT 0 points1 point ago

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I pooped.

[–]Rumpojec 0 points1 point ago

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I refuse to confine the win of this gif to a mere comment!

...oops.

[–]uxoriouswidow 0 points1 point ago

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There is no legitimate comeback to this. Regards of topic discussed, argumentation strategy employed, or quality of reasoning brought forward; nothing you say beyond the point of having a beard bitch-slapped onto your face is any longer valid.

[–]kristianur 0 points1 point ago

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How to always win a fight:

Learn.

[–]Bst1337 0 points1 point ago

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I was expecting to find that someone had made the gif go backwards. Wake up internet!

[–]bleedingoutlaw28 0 points1 point ago

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Never argue with a man that can slap you into next year!

[–]SUPERKAMIGURU 0 points1 point ago

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Interestingly enough, that's my self defense mechanism. It confuses predators, giving me enough time to escape. Its how I've survived all these years.

[–]Chachoregard 0 points1 point ago

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Smack some manliness to him, it's the only way!

[–]expider 0 points1 point ago

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Now times that beard slap by infinity

[–]Doctor-Doom 0 points1 point ago

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Doom requires no fighting advice, but approves of the gesture.

[–]Roton7 0 points1 point ago

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A post about a "beard slap", and no one has mentioned WheezyWaiter?

[–]Bush2012 0 points1 point ago

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LOL

[–]KingTsu 0 points1 point ago

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He beat the beard out of him

[–]need2reddit 0 points1 point ago

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How the fuck is this not a front page link yet?

[–]ynoty3k 0 points1 point ago

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If you play it backward, a happy guy is concerned with something then gets backhanded so hard his beard disappears, obviously making him furious

[–]ThinkingApple 0 points1 point ago

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Can't upvote...it's at 1337...

[–]ricacid 0 points1 point ago

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So thats how Galifinakis does it!!!

[–]OMGZombii 0 points1 point ago

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Forehand of Growth +2

[–]ManFromViltrum 0 points1 point ago

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Now punch him in the balls.

[–]Silenced_is_Foo 0 points1 point ago

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http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=2392

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]clickwir 1 point2 points ago

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You get to admire their nice beard.

[–]erishun -1 points0 points ago

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How to transform from a normal looking dude to a homeless-looking vagrant piece of shit in 2 seconds!

[–]evitagen-armak -1 points0 points ago

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Relevant SMBC

[–]WreckerCrew -4 points-3 points ago

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Skittles slap would be funnier.

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