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all 90 comments

[–]VastDeferens 49 points50 points ago

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Don't worry, you can just take the whole bottle now. Your body will figure it all out for you.

[–]lumpyoatmeal 20 points21 points ago

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Dr. Seuss, MD

[–]fulanitodetal 1 point2 points ago

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I have been non-stop laughing at this for five minutes straight!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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I'm sorry.

[–]ag04 -3 points-2 points ago

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That's good... almost too good o.0

[–]soaringrooster 17 points18 points ago

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Looks like your pharmacist partakes.

[–]Dejh 17 points18 points ago

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"Take one of these whenever these instructions start to make sense."

[–]IOIOOIIOIO 68 points69 points ago

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Take them every night.

Once per day, take them before food.

Three time per day you should take them four times per day, and every third time you should take between four and six at once.

[–]Oldsoul77 17 points18 points ago

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Methamphetamine is one hell of a drug !

[–]jesusismoney 16 points17 points ago

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Math is one hell of a drug.

[–]Whiskey_Fred 8 points9 points ago

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Dividing by zero is never a good idea, but on math it is.

[–]jesusismoney 4 points5 points ago

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Math: Not even once.

[–]Lazarus5214 19 points20 points ago

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Three time per day you should take them four times per day

What, if anything, does that mean? lol

[–]LayzeeH 13 points14 points ago

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60% of the time, it works every time

[–]Radico87 20 points21 points ago

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that you OD.

[–]greatkeplersghost 4 points5 points ago

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Split the day into 3 parts (8 hours each).
Within each of those 8-hour periods, take a pill 4 times (every 2 hours).

Do this twice per quarter-day.

[–]VastDeferens 3 points4 points ago

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So when you say take a pill 4 times, does that mean swallow it and then throw it back up 3 times so you can swallow it again?

[–]greatkeplersghost 1 point2 points ago

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Of course. How else would you get the pill back within 2 hours? I don't even think laxatives work that fast, do they?

[–]Lazarus5214 2 points3 points ago

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Split the day into 3 parts (8 hours each).

Within each of those 8-hour periods, take a pill 4 times (every 2 hours).

That would be "Three times a day, take them 4 times." It is the "per day" after the "four times" that doesn't make sense.

[–]jeffrexsave 2 points3 points ago

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can someone explain the explanation

[–]ienjoyfood 1 point2 points ago

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Three times per day take them four times per day. So I guess thats 12 times per day: Once before ingesting food. Every third time(out of the 12) take between 4 and 6 pills.

[–]laidymondegreen 0 points1 point ago

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I love you.

[–]IOIOOIIOIO 1 point2 points ago

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I love you, too.

[–]wonderfullyfantastic -2 points-1 points ago

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Down vote for trying to make it look like you understand wtf this means when in fact it makes absolutely no sense at all. consider this a warning.

[–]The_Absurdist 8 points9 points ago

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Let's make this a game: how many pills are we being asked to take? I'm going with between 16-36. Take once daily (1) x (4) times a day x (3) times a day = 12. Every three [of the 12] times daily, take (1), take (2), take (3) x (1)or(2) [the lowest possible combination every time being (1)x(1)--every 3 times=4, and the highest possible combination being (3)x(2)=6--every 3 times, giving us 24. It looks like we have to take between 16-36 pills per day.

[–]BONUSBOX 6 points7 points ago

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HERE ARE SOME MERCILON TABS, YUM!

TAKE ONE, TAKE TWO, HELL, TAKE EM THREE TIMES A FUCKING DAY.

WE GOT ALL KINDS OF TABLETS, LOZENGES, PILLS...

[–]cynnie 5 points6 points ago

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Ow. My brain.

[–]ma5haga 5 points6 points ago

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It's birth control. Once a day should do the trick.

[–]CellPhoneFlush 22 points23 points ago

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Twice to prevent twins.

[–]SomethingOverThere 2 points3 points ago

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Don't take 'm if you don't want any kids.

[–]B0Boman 0 points1 point ago

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Um... I think birth control pills tend to work in the opposite way.

[–]SomethingOverThere 0 points1 point ago

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Did you even read the directions?

[–]kernelhappy 0 points1 point ago

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The fact that these are the directions for a birth control is scary as shit. We're liable to end up with a wave of blonde baby mommas.

[–]eltigretom 6 points7 points ago

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Your pharmacist is trying to kill you

[–]Just_Is 5 points6 points ago

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for when you absolutely positively do not want babies....ever.

[–]DoctorPotatoe 3 points4 points ago

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As a future pharmacist I approve of these instructions.

[–]specialkake 4 points5 points ago

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Medical Cannabis.

[–]Toovya 2 points3 points ago

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This is a prescription for weed. /understand

[–]rifk 1 point2 points ago

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It's actually birth control pills.

[–]specialkake 1 point2 points ago

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I know.

[–]FaultyWires 3 points4 points ago

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This sounds like a quarterback.

[–]naveedy 3 points4 points ago

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I'm crossposting this to r/pharmacy, because we appreciate this crap. Someone was retarded and was allowed to breathe in a pharmacy of some sort to let this happen.

[–]xynorm 2 points3 points ago

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First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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It's the pill. You take it once a day. Duh.

[–]thisguywalker 2 points3 points ago

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I was confused until I saw the green cross... then it all made sense.

[–]rifk 0 points1 point ago

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They're birth control pills, supposedly.

[–]brownmandm 2 points3 points ago

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The first indication that what you're taking is a placebo.

[–]Raptorace22 2 points3 points ago

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I think these are the directions that come with medical marijuana.

[–]0l1vR 2 points3 points ago

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It's always 'take, take, take'. It should be give give give instead. Society makes me sick......

Just kidding :D

[–]Chuck_T_Bone 2 points3 points ago

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Take one every minute until you understand what these directions mean... then relax and say AHHHHHHH

[–]Scoops_Haagendazs 2 points3 points ago

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TIL what the prescription label for meth looks like.

[–]poorpinto 2 points3 points ago

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mercilon is a birth control pill. take once daily at the same time. I think those instructions are homemade.

[–]Raptman 1 point2 points ago

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If you fail, you might die

[–]shmacky 1 point2 points ago

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What?!

[–]GoLightLady 1 point2 points ago

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Sounds like Dr Seuss directions. Careful you might grown a fuzzy fizzer out of your what's it.

[–]lusciouslou 1 point2 points ago

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Well, you're fucked.

[–]cmatt010 1 point2 points ago

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OD incoming.

[–]SamWilber 1 point2 points ago

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"Its working"

[–]wewtaco 1 point2 points ago

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My personal favorite is

"Take one tablet twice daily."

Then what are the rest of the tablets for?

[–]maboughey -1 points0 points ago

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It means "Take one tablet every 12 hours."

[–]mja666 2 points3 points ago

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Gee, you really think so?

[–]chyeaaaa 1 point2 points ago

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MERCILON TABS SHOW NO MERCY

[–]riles2 1 point2 points ago

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I read it aloud and then someone hiked a football at me.

[–]ArcticTundra 1 point2 points ago

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It is as i the doctor was stroking out when he/she wrote the instructions.

[–]Ifixedthatforyou 1 point2 points ago

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You are most likely working in a pharmacy in Dublin with a high number of patients. I could probably identify what pharmacy you're in...

[–]themicy 1 point2 points ago

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"Keep out of reach of children" seems like good advice.

[–]jayce513 1 point2 points ago

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wat

[–]Breadnaught 1 point2 points ago

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Best read in an auctioneer's voice

[–]psyki 1 point2 points ago

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Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

[–]imgur-mirror-bot 7 points8 points ago

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IMGUR.com MIRROR

Upload Page
Direct Link


imgur-mirror-bot automatically mirrors images to imgur.com. For any comments or requests, message me.

[–]username103 1 point2 points ago*

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Your upload page and direct link are identical.

Edit: Stupid smart RES :)

[–]DavousRex 2 points3 points ago

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"Upload Page" means the upload page on imgur. If you go to the links you will see that they are ever-so-slightly different.

[–]DanTycoon 0 points1 point ago*

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...no they're not? They're both the image, not a page on imgur.

EDIT: I am an idiot because RES made me one. Thanks...human on the bot account.

[–]imgur-mirror-bot 2 points3 points ago

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RES modifies links to imgur.com so they always point to the actual image, if you have the inline image viewer enabled.

[–]DanTycoon 1 point2 points ago

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So it seems. I edited my post because I'm an idiot. Thanks! :D

[–]imgur-mirror-bot 4 points5 points ago

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Human? Yes...yes, I am the human, and I am alive and 100% breathing. Absolutely no robot uprising h¶░ere.

[–]benjih 3 points4 points ago

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Holy shit best directions ever

[–]Shurikane 1 point2 points ago

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lol'd at the directions.

Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

[–]Quate 0 points1 point ago

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Ctrl+F "Has anyone"

Yep.

[–]Razenghan 1 point2 points ago

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[–]Tinkytoes 0 points1 point ago

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Sounds like they are counting off a song... a 1 a 2 a 1 2 3 4.

[–]Jimmenystrings 0 points1 point ago

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Merciless tabs

[–]fivepines 0 points1 point ago

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Smoke two joints before you smoke two joints and then smoke two more.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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That's almost as confusing as women.

[–]nanakon 0 points1 point ago

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What the... I don't even...

[–]HolyHolyHolyHoly 0 points1 point ago

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Just take all of them at the same time.

[–]nattering -1 points0 points ago

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[–]vonshavingcream -1 points0 points ago

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All your pills are belong to us

[–]Tyranicide -2 points-1 points ago

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REPOST ONCE DAILY TWICE A WEEK WITH FOOD THREE TIMES A WEEK

[–]Tyranicide -2 points-1 points ago

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REPOST ONCE DAILY TWICE A WEEK WITH FOOD THREE TIMES A WEEK