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1033
1034

Don't judge me, lamp! (imgur.com)

submitted ago by Juerves_Mercules

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top 200 commentsshow all 208
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[–]animooter 351 points352 points ago

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I saw this almost instantly

[–]wontstoptalking 166 points167 points ago

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i am from the future

this image is everywhere

the canadians win the olympics

sarah jessica parker wins the kentucky derby

[–]walk_on_feces 39 points40 points ago

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Sarah Jessica Parker only paid 3:2. Huge favorite.

[–]DataDragon 22 points23 points ago

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I always thought Sarah Jessica Parker was more velociraptor than horse. But now i see it.

[–][deleted] 22 points23 points ago

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Here's a lot of Sarah Jessica Parker Pictures compared to horses.

[–]spectre-six-one 12 points13 points ago

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Those horses actually come up pretty favourably.

[–]seriouslydamaged 7 points8 points ago

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I was expecting a comparison of two horses in the end.

[–]Farull 1 point2 points ago

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That was the funniest thing I've seen in a long time. Thank you.

[–]Mooam 0 points1 point ago

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You had that on standby for this occasion, didn't you?

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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Interesting, I was thinking she looked more like a baboon.

[–]tokomini 8 points9 points ago

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That means you can't rape her.

...right?

[–]favrefan12491 8 points9 points ago

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More or less a transvestite donkey witch

[–]optigon 1 point2 points ago

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What is Sarah Jessica Parker doing in a horse race?! I thought she was a transvestite DONKEY witch!

[–]eddiemon 9 points10 points ago

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I'm shamed to admit it, but I giggled like a little girl for a good five minutes at the last one..

How do the canadians "win" the olympics anyways? Is it like a "winning by participating" kind of deal? I kid, I kid..

[–]snarkyaardvark 2 points3 points ago*

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Same way we won the Stanley cup this year. Bet big on the other guys then take a dive in the third.

Have fake riot but makes sure no one gets hurt. Make a clean get away.

We got the idea from Pulp Fiction...

[–]ModstRob 1 point2 points ago

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I will raise a prize wining horse named Sarah Jessica Parker.

[–]curtdammit 7 points8 points ago*

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The Canadians always win, eh?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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This deserves far more upvotes

[–]Varyter 7 points8 points ago

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Why won't you stop talking?

[–]desktop_ninja 4 points5 points ago

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Don't understand the down votes. I guess people didn't see the relevant username...

[–]Spartanfred104 21 points22 points ago

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I saw this instantly

[–]TheMadMule 13 points14 points ago

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"Oh, you!"

[–]Juerves_Mercules[S] 41 points42 points ago

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Nice! I was actually going to draw that on a piece of paper and tape it on, well, I'm still going to. My lady's mom gave her the lamp last week, and as soon as I laid eyes on it, I saw that animation in my head. We call it, Judgemental Lamp

[–]HatefulRespect 44 points45 points ago

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Judgmental Lamp isn't mad just disappointed.

[–]Juerves_Mercules[S] 18 points19 points ago

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Why you disappoint in me, Lamp? :(

[–]Varyter 24 points25 points ago

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STOP LOOKING AT ME SWAN

[–]xanced 9 points10 points ago

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... and now I get it

[–]Juerves_Mercules[S] 11 points12 points ago

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Me too. I didn't even realize that I didn't get it until I got it. Now I love Lamp.

[–]ReasonShallPrevail 11 points12 points ago

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...You're the OP.

[–]ThreeSecondsToLi 7 points8 points ago

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Do you really love the lamp, or are you just saying it because you saw it?

[–]Juerves_Mercules[S] 3 points4 points ago

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No...I am. Or am I?

[–]Phoequinox 6 points7 points ago

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I love OP's thought processes, but you get major points for the effort.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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you and juerves get to share this post lets say 60%-40%

[–]jobin_segan 2 points3 points ago

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After seeing what you saw:

I saw this almost instantly

[–]mau5head87 1 point2 points ago

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I LOVE LAMP!

[–]tombulimba -1 points0 points ago

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Wow. This went down hill FAST

[–]bonjourdan 28 points29 points ago

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THE URL IS A MALE CAT

[–]coma_toes 105 points106 points ago

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Shady character if ever I saw one.

[–]Schwartztron 46 points47 points ago

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An odd trait for one so enlightened

[–]tanmnm 22 points23 points ago

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Don't take that! You should socket.

[–]duncjake 20 points21 points ago

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oh lighten up

[–]beanswiggin 25 points26 points ago

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Watt the fuck are you guys talking about???

[–]EmpressK 27 points28 points ago

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I don't know about you but I candela bad pun when I see one.

[–]canadafuckyeah 17 points18 points ago

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Can we switch topics for a second? Pun threads aren't very bright.

[–]zobbyblob 7 points8 points ago

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Your wish is my command.

Supermodels go: http://vanlaker.files.wordpress.com/2010/04/1989supermodels.jpg

"Now back to the good part."

[–]Dustintico 7 points8 points ago

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I totally just clicked that blindly. Is it bad that my first thought was "THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH LAMPS!"?

[–]Eton1357 1 point2 points ago

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6CPwOOK4nEM

[–]finkalicious 13 points14 points ago

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Yeah, I don't think he's the brightest bulb.

[–]ThreeSecondsToLi 3 points4 points ago

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Wow! This topic sure is getting fluorescent!

[–]mrubin89 4 points5 points ago

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Seems to be turned off

[–]bigleslie 9 points10 points ago

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Dimwits.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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Can you shed some light on this situation?

[–]hoblod 8 points9 points ago

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You're not a bright one are you.

[–]Juerves_Mercules[S] 7 points8 points ago

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Obviously not the brightest bulb in the box.

[–]wontstoptalking 16 points17 points ago

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Watch your tungsten!

[–]corndoggydogg 7 points8 points ago

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This is an incan-descent into madness!

[–]ThreeSecondsToLi -1 points0 points ago

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You are all mad.

[–]bluefoot55 2 points3 points ago

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Yeah. Like it should judge ...

[–]gentlebot 53 points54 points ago

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Oh, like you're so innocent. I've seen what you lamps do after hours!

[–]karona513 28 points29 points ago

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Whoa. What the fuck did my eyes just do?

[–]wontstoptalking 31 points32 points ago

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Every time I see this picture I see the illusion for like 0.5 seconds and then I see the lamp and I'm like "godDAMMIT EYES SEE THE OTHER THING AGAIN" but they never do.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Thepunk28 23 points24 points ago

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Obvious shoop, but still hilariously awesome!

[–]binary 11 points12 points ago

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Of course it's an obvious photoshop, big red frames do not just hang in the air like that.

[–]Lurk4r 5 points6 points ago

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lamp, rule 34.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points ago

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It's really a lamp. That's a pretty obvious shoop, look at her right arm.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

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I can tell by the pixels.

[–]lizardlike 0 points1 point ago

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It's a "NOT" lamp from IKEA, specifically. They cost about $5 and are everywhere.

[–]markpelly 0 points1 point ago

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Stop making fun of her imperfections man.

[–]Hi_There_Face_Here 6 points7 points ago

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Not Bad.

[–]PerfectLucidity 6 points7 points ago

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Wow! She really lights up the room!

[–]bluefoot55 0 points1 point ago

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And the rug ties the room together.

[–]Aitrus233 9 points10 points ago

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...I love lamp.

[–]Dot_Matrix 0 points1 point ago

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Came here to say this but you beat me to it...take my upvotes, spread the lamp love and be happy

[–]G-razer 2 points3 points ago

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Happy smiling lamp and a dead parrot in the freezer.

[–]the_advice_line 0 points1 point ago

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After seeing that it turns out I'm 50% more perverted than I expected... I'm off to seek help.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

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bottom right is a tattoo

[–]ride686 8 points9 points ago

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Reminds me of this commercial

[–]Juerves_Mercules[S] 2 points3 points ago

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Judgemental Lamp is disappointed with swedish man's lack of empathy for Sad Lamp.

[–]HotRodLincoln 17 points18 points ago

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Akimbo - is a human body position in which the hands are on the hips and the elbows are bowed outward, or bent/bowed in a more general sense

[–]blobbohen 6 points7 points ago*

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You must mean Arms Akimbo. Don't worry, we're looking out for you.

[–]Tonamel 4 points5 points ago

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That was exactly what I wanted that link to be.

[–]Atario 5 points6 points ago

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/r/pareidolia

[–]BR0STRADAMUS 2 points3 points ago

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this was the second image when I Googled "Akimbo".....[NSFW]

[–]Clazzy 0 points1 point ago

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please pass the eyebleach

[–]watchtan 1 point2 points ago

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ugh, love that word! I looked it up a while ago and totally forgot about it.

[–]nealio1000 2 points3 points ago

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Why did you say "ugh"?

[–]mehatch 1 point2 points ago

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I learned this word from Robert mckee

[–]dj1200techniques 7 points8 points ago

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I learned this word from Call of Duty

[–]StuBenedict 8 points9 points ago

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The dumbest thing I've ever upvoted.

[–]maxp0wah 10 points11 points ago

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Number One? Really?

[–]tha_snazzle 3 points4 points ago

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4chan's gonna hate us for this!

[–]mundungous 4 points5 points ago

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He said don't judge him!

[–]Juerves_Mercules[S] 5 points6 points ago

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Thanks!

[–]maxp0wah 3 points4 points ago

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sorry bro, amirite?

[–]Juerves_Mercules[S] 5 points6 points ago

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Well, I like that stupid picture because I thought it was rad, and I thought Reddit would like it, but I didn't upvote it to the front page. There are more important things going on than my girlfriend's lamp, but I'm still stoked.

[–]TheAtomicPlayboy 12 points13 points ago

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I love lamp.

[–]la_dee_da 0 points1 point ago

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Do you really love the lamp, or are you just saying it because you saw it?

[–]TheAtomicPlayboy 0 points1 point ago

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I love lamp... I love lamp.

[–]casual_shoggoth 2 points3 points ago

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You know lamp, I give you LIFE. With the flick of my fingers, I allow you to illuminate my life. Show a little damn appreciation for our relationship here, you ungrateful object!

[–]watchtan 2 points3 points ago

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Judging lamp is watching you masturbate.

[–]bluefoot55 0 points1 point ago

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Judgmental Lamp is by your bed, and saw what you and that girl did last night.

[–]Joshf1234 2 points3 points ago

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The word for judgmental "hand-on-hip" posture shown here is "akimbo" as in, "the lamp stood with lamp-arms akimbo after seeing what you just did with that dog, sicko"

[–]cardern 2 points3 points ago

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YOU DON'T KNOW ME!

[–]wessago 2 points3 points ago

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i bring food to home!! i respect you and show my interest !! what else you want me to do ha? i fucking hate you lamb! i wish i never married with you...oh yeah? well go then go back to your antique shop and cry to your papa leave me alone here. i am sick of you.

[–]TasteOfJace 2 points3 points ago

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This lamp must be friends with that smug clock from Beauty and the Beast. Jerks.

[–]TheRealBacon 2 points3 points ago

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"Fapping again, huh? Unacceptable!" -Lampy

[–]Thiscat 2 points3 points ago

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And posting that was all it took.

[–]rjmk 2 points3 points ago

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The Knights of New let one pass....

[–]Juerves_Mercules[S] 1 point2 points ago

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Upboat for no motherfuckin' K!!!

[–]BR0STRADAMUS 2 points3 points ago

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"Oh, who's this shady bitch?"

[–]Psycochem 2 points3 points ago

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It is such a happy day when someone you introduced Reddit to makes it to the front page. They grow up so fast.

[–]Juerves_Mercules[S] 1 point2 points ago

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Thanks buddy.

[–]FatGirlsTryHarder 5 points6 points ago

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A picture of a fucking lamp is the top post on Reddit right now.

[–]whey_to_go 2 points3 points ago

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I feel like we are getting punk'd.

[–]haiku_robot -1 points0 points ago

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A picture of a 
fucking lamp is the top post 
on Reddit right now.

[–]RIDER_OF_BROHAN 3 points4 points ago

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Is everyone else baked out of their mind but me? This is fucking stupid.

[–]wrinkled_penis 4 points5 points ago

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If you have this lamp displaying from your window people will probably judge you.

[–]Juerves_Mercules[S] 0 points1 point ago

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It must be Italian!

[–]I_Like_Batman 1 point2 points ago

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I kinda imagine it going "Oh you" in a sort of playful manner.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Downboat for reminding me of bitchy women.

[–]Wingly 1 point2 points ago

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That's what it feels like when my girlfriend judges me!

[–]divester 1 point2 points ago

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That bitch!

[–]mehatch 1 point2 points ago

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That is NOT a male feline

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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It knows what you did on nsfw, and it does not approve

[–]MisterWonka 1 point2 points ago

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You got off light, if you ask me.

[–]Red4lpha 1 point2 points ago

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Stop bringing so many fat chicks home then...

[–]LookARedSquirrel84 1 point2 points ago

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What did you do, Ray?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Yes, I masturbate into a sock. WHAT OF IT?

[–]thang1thang2 1 point2 points ago

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DON'T LAMP ME, JUDGE!

[–]snickles19 1 point2 points ago

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wow, you made it to #1 pretty darn fast huh?

[–]terran_me_apart_lisa 1 point2 points ago

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mmmmm hmmmmm

[–]BenardsRegards 1 point2 points ago

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Oh, OK, I guess just pout

[–]maannequin 1 point2 points ago

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The Cristiano Ronaldo of lamps.

[–]KevinMcCallister 1 point2 points ago

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I LOVE JUDGE

[–]PineapplePancakes 1 point2 points ago

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May I present the lady lamp: http://i.imgur.com/74AdS.jpg

[–]maximm 1 point2 points ago

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I would break it.

[–]CulturaProfetica 1 point2 points ago

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Anyone want to explain this to me?

[–]talentedjw88 1 point2 points ago

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The body and arms of the lamp are shaped in a way that makes it look like lamp is putting its hands on its hips.

[–]schul983 1 point2 points ago

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does anyone else see a creepy face in the gold plating above the wood?

[–]HappyBearSundae 1 point2 points ago

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I SEEN WHAT CHOO DID

[–]Kiwilolo 1 point2 points ago

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Does no one else see the CRAZY TENTACLE MONSTER?

[–]NekkidSnaku 1 point2 points ago

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Don't judge me monkey...

[–]just_be_friends 1 point2 points ago

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Lamps have it hard too! Don't judge!

[–]virtualzen 1 point2 points ago

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so wait, is the lamp saying "don't judge me, lamp" to another lamp?

[–]Avendrel 1 point2 points ago

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My name is Judge~!

[–]Shirk08 1 point2 points ago

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You turn it around to avoid it's paralyzing stare...you cannot escape it's icy glare!

[–]LINCKING 1 point2 points ago

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All the top comments are done by now, so i'll post in hopes all the late people enjoy my sincerity.... i love my i-pod related shit, yet my grandparents have totally ruined my cottage..... FUCK I COULD MAKE SO MUCH CASH WITH THAT COTTAGE!

[–]_Czechmate_ 1 point2 points ago

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I love lamp!

[–]iamcarsenio 1 point2 points ago

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G1PllrfeiVw

Thought of this immediately

[–]arghnard 1 point2 points ago

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mehehehh

[–]imafishyfish 1 point2 points ago

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Shit, if the lamp isn't judging you, I'm judging you for owning such an ugly lamp.

[–]KoyaHusky 1 point2 points ago

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Im just too busy bein' delicious. Was the only thing I could think... -judge fudge

[–]hurlga 0 points1 point ago

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Upvote for being the only one in this thread to mention the obvious and extremely awesome judge fudge!

[–]Lakhuton 1 point2 points ago

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The URL is XYCAT. XYCAT!

[–]donyahelwa 1 point2 points ago

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You're stupid like your father!!

[–]slyguy183 1 point2 points ago

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I dunno, looks like the lamp is delighted.

[–]jamesneysmith 1 point2 points ago

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You should tape, paint or whatever a disappointed face on the inside of the shade so that it is only visible when someone turns on the lamp.

[–]44in313 1 point2 points ago

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Did you cum on the lamp? There's a stain.

[–]vtechnique 0 points1 point ago

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Oh no you didn't!

[–]Lampmonster1 0 points1 point ago

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Screw you, I do what I want.

[–]DonaldMcRonald 0 points1 point ago

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"Well, I NEVER...!"

[–]nealio1000 0 points1 point ago

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That's one sassy lamp.

[–]aussieidiot 0 points1 point ago

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That lamp has the same pose as the one my mum has when she's scolding me. That brought back some bad memories.

[–]KennyMcCormick 0 points1 point ago

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I, personally, love lamp.

[–]DigitalN 0 points1 point ago

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Stop looking at me SWAAANNN!

[–]bluetemplar 0 points1 point ago

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But I love lamp.

[–]Matt872000 0 points1 point ago

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It's like something out of The Brave Little Toaster.

[–]Etheo 0 points1 point ago

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Congratulations Reddit, you're now a collective of intellectual beings who worships a picture of a lamp.

My deepest congratulations to you all.

[–]Cbgiles 2 points3 points ago

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The lamp-god of reddit.

He is a vengeful and an angry lamp.

[–]ktlelia 0 points1 point ago

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The lamp looks pissed it was placed in the corner. Must have been a naughty lamp.

[–]smokenfly 0 points1 point ago

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Marcy darcy I am not a chicken

[–]gennarogattuso 0 points1 point ago

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hahaha

[–]itswithane 0 points1 point ago

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That lamp's got a pretty saucy figure.

[–]joe6pak 1 point2 points ago

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get's 'turned on' pretty easy too.

[–]HANKnDANK 0 points1 point ago

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Anybody else read this in Billy Madison's " stop looking at me swan " voice?

[–]saintdog 0 points1 point ago

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Maybe you should stop masturbating in front of the lamp. Have you considered that?

[–]Meoow 0 points1 point ago

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You might like /r/Pareidolia

[–]farting_tomato 0 points1 point ago

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Redditness gallore. Better go to Digg front page and learn something new and interesting.

[–]cpqq 0 points1 point ago

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"CAT" in the URL on an otherwise... eh picture? To the front page!

[–]PissBlasta 0 points1 point ago

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Anybody remember this one?

[–]DigoxinToxin 0 points1 point ago

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Be our guest.

[–]Konchshell 0 points1 point ago

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AKIMBO LAMP

[–]themajestic12 0 points1 point ago

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I used to love lamp. Now I'm not so sure.

[–]chodenasty 0 points1 point ago

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how does shit like this make it to the front page?! =/

[–]freethinkaa 0 points1 point ago

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I'm Brian Fellows!

[–]dexxtaa 0 points1 point ago

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But lamp, I love you

[–]CaptainCrunch 0 points1 point ago

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YOU'RE NOT MY REAL LAMP!!!

[–]jaredisle 0 points1 point ago*

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Lamp isn't angry. It's just disappointed.

[–]Mattron2021 0 points1 point ago

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That's one sassy lamp.

[–]Vassosman 0 points1 point ago

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Its not bad, its disappointed.

[–]Draegur 0 points1 point ago

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ever notice how the people who demand, "Don't judge me!" are often ones that have quite a lot more for which they can be judged than many other people?

[–]bdude12 0 points1 point ago

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How does this crap reach the front page?

[–]thecoffee 0 points1 point ago

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Karma Whoring comments like yours need a home too ಠ_ಠ

[–]TheGiantPanda -1 points0 points ago

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Too late...

load more comments (6 replies)

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