this post was submitted on
1,128 points (54% like it)
7,509 up votes 6,381 down votes

funny

subscribe2,403,677 readers

10,249 users here now

PLEASE, No posts with their sole purpose being to communicate with another redditor. Click for an Example.


Welcome to r/Funny:

You may only post if you are funny.

Please No:

  • Screenshots of reddit comment threads. Post a link with context to /r/bestof or /r/defaultgems if from a default subreddit instead.

  • Posts for the specific point of it being your reddit birthday.

  • Politics - This includes the 2012 Presidential candidates or bills in congress.

  • Rage comics - Go to /fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu instead.

  • Memes - Go to /r/AdviceAnimals or /r/Memes instead.

  • Demotivational posters - Go to /r/Demotivational instead.

  • Pictures of just text - Make a self post instead.

  • DAE posts - Go to /r/doesanybodyelse

  • eCards - the poll result was 55.02% in favor of removal. Please submit eCards to /r/ecards

  • URL shorteners - No link shorteners (or HugeURL) in either post links or comments. They will be deleted regardless of intent.

Rehosted webcomics will be removed. Please submit a link to the original comic's site and preferably an imgur link in the comments. Do not post a link to the comic image, it must be linked to the page of the comic. (*) (*)

Need more? Check out:

Still need more? See Reddit's best / worst and offensive joke collections (warning: some of those jokes are offensive / nsfw!).


Please DO NOT post personal information. This includes anything hosted on Facebook's servers, as they can be traced to the original account holder.


If your submission appears to be banned, please don't just delete it as that makes the filter hate you! Instead please send us a message with a link to the post. We'll unban it and it should get better. Please allow 10 minutes for the post to appear before messaging moderators


The moderators of /r/funny reserve the right to moderate posts and comments at their discretion, with regard to their perception of the suitability of said posts and comments for this subreddit. Thank you for your understanding.


CSS - BritishEnglishPolice ©2011

a community for

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

top 200 commentsshow all 381

[–]tcrat 68 points69 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Funny how the truthers always forget that the Deathstar is a battlestation that had just destroyed Alderaan (murdering far more innocent people), and at the time was in the process of attempting to destroy one of Yavin's moons. There were no innocent contractor's on that thing by the final stages; they knew exactly what they were working on (a WMD) and what it was capable of doing (I'm sure many experiencing it first hand).

[–]Measure76 37 points38 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The allegation that the death star destroyed alderan simply because it was in orbit at the time is a rebel lie. Anyone can review the tape and see that the shot actually came from the grassy knoll moon.

[–]trumann 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Don't be ridiculous the death star was defending itself, alderaan shot first.

[–]Squatso 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The only remaining witness was also shot by Jack Ruby - yes, the same exact one that shot Oswald.

[–]DidntGetYourJoke 23 points24 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Alderaan shot first

[–]tcrat 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The gif made me lol

[–]spagma 8 points9 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Many Bothans died to bring us this information.

[–]Perky_Goth 208 points209 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Vader was piloting a TIE Advance, not a TIE Fighter.

[–]jabrodo 58 points59 points ago*

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

TIE Advanced x1 actually. It was a limited run prototype with elements that were later used in the TIE Bomber and Interceptor. Further development led to the actual TIE Advanced, which to distinguish between the Advanced and this one, was colloquially known as the TIE Avenger.

EDIT: This thread is really making me want to bust out the ol' TIE Fighter disks. Why can't LucasArts just port these games to modern OS's with better graphics?

[–]superbad 52 points53 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Because Lucas can't port anything to a new platform without making significant alterations?

[–]thenuge26 25 points26 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

BOOYAH!

Suck on that Lucas!

cries myself to sleep while watching the bluerays

[–]snailspace 12 points13 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]jabrodo 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I don't know. Do we dare and only end up like we have before when hoped? We've put ourselves out there so many times, and we've been hurt so many times..... but we're stupid so of course we'll hope.

[–]strikervulsine 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Bet it's some crappy Clone Wars title and nothing like X-wing vs Tie Fighter.

Btw, anyone remember the second to last mission of the "Balance of Power" expansion for x-wing vs tie fighter for the empire? Where you had to scout capital ships at a shipyawd surrounded by mines that would launch concussion missiles at you if they were destroyed, AND there were assault transports laying more of them AND you had 33 minutes to do it?

Never beat that level, ever.

[–]sgt_shizzles 11 points12 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Because that might be an informed business decision.

[–]LordStryker 7 points8 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

StarWars wiki....

Welp, there goes my afternoon.

[–]Veltan 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Wookieepedia. :P

[–]ThatShoopWasEasy 96 points97 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Came here just to say this. JESUS, GET YOUR FACTS RIGHT, YOU IMPERIAL CONSPIRACY NUTS.

[–]mayoroftuesday 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

This is important.

[–]diskmaster23 24 points25 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

and TIE Advance had shields.

[–]HanselSoHotRightNow 20 points21 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

and a hyperdrive

[–]stillalone 24 points25 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

How convenient.

[–]I_Contradict 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Well its vader's personal ship, its gonna have a few perks.

[–]diskmaster23 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Which is awesome.

[–]big-o-notation 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

THIS IS AN OUTRAGE

[–]chikachikaReditshady 21 points22 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

THIS. IS. ALDERAAN!!

[–]radong01 12 points13 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Nooo. This is Patrick!

[–]Stenas 11 points12 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Nope. Chuck Testa.

[–]wogmafia 291 points292 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

OK I was like meh until I got to the part where the emperor is reading My Pet Bantha. That was hilarious

[–]kerrigan2 53 points54 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

That book is classic

[–]adamgomo 26 points27 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I want it read by Morgan Freeman

[–]dahlor 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I want this read by Morgan Freeman.

[–]Lurking_Grue 10 points11 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Wake up banthles!

[–]ButtsMcKracken 111 points112 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

All those innocent contractors brought in to do the job were killed — casualties of a war they had nothing to do with. All right, look: you’re a roofer, some juicy government contract comes your way. You got a wife and kids, the two-story in suburbia. This is a government contract, which means all sorts of benefits. Along come these left-wing militants that blast everything within a three-mile radius with their lasers. You didn’t ask for that. You have no personal politics. You’re just trying to scrape out a living.

[–]jshadoww 113 points114 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Blue-Collar Man: Well, I'm a contractor myself. I'm a roofer... (digs into pocket and produces business card) Dunn and Reddy Home Improvements. And speaking as a roofer, I can say that a roofer's personal politics come heavily into play when choosing jobs.

Randal: Like when?

Blue-Collar Man: Three months ago I was offered a job up in the hills. A beautiful house with tons of property. It was a simple reshingling job, but I was told that if it was finished within a day, my price would be doubled. Then I realized whose house it was.

Dante: Whose house was it?

Blue-Collar Man: Dominick Bambino's.

Randal: "Babyface" Bambino? The gangster?

Blue-Collar Man: The same. The money was right, but the risk was too big. I knew who he was, and based on that, I passed the job on to a friend of mine.

Dante: Based on personal politics.

Blue-Collar Man: Right. And that week, the Foresci family put a hit on Babyface's house. My friend was shot and killed. He wasn't even finished shingling.

Randal: No way!

Blue-Collar Man: (paying for coffee) I'm alive because I knew there were risks involved taking on that particular client. My friend wasn't so lucky. (pauses to reflect) You know, any contractor willing to work on that Death Star knew the risks. If they were killed, it was their own fault. A roofer listens to this... (taps his heart) not his wallet.

[–]prichards 43 points44 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Fun (and true story!):

My great grandfather was an electrician in Chicago during the Al Capone era of prohibition. His partner took a job at a club owned by some gangsters and got killed in a mob hit. I didn't even hear this story until our family reunion in August, and all I could think about after I heard it was Clerks.

[–]tedington 16 points17 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

You think the average storm trooper knows how to install a toilet main? Alls they know is killing and white uniforms.

[–]nalc 12 points13 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

There have been Clerks references in the past three posts i have read comments, as well as my coworker mentioning Clerks in the past 5 minutes. Maybe it is a sign.

[–]deanbmmv 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Maybe it was on TV recently?

[–]Jesusilovecheeses 7 points8 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Must. Watch. Cleeeerks. zombie arms

[–]Abbelwoi 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Baader-Meinhof strikes again!

[–]cbs5090 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

CONSPIRACY!!!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Feels job is dangerous. Passes it on to friend.

[–]NintenDork 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Bravo Sir. Bravo.

[–]seifd 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The construction was done by slaves and prisoners, according to the book Death Star.

[–]centurijon 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

But it had to be designed and overseen by someone.

Slaves and prisoners won't build a death star just because you ask them to.

[–]seifd 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

One of the main characters in the book was an architect who was taken as a political prisoner. She worked on the Death Star to get off the prison world she was on. People tended to die there, you see.

[–]pusangani 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Along come these X-wing militants that blast everything within a three-mile radius with their lasers.

FTFY

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

yes yes..we've seen Clerks too.

[–][deleted] 37 points38 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Y'know, it does kinda make sense even from an in-universe point of view that Vader blew up the Death Star.

First, he leaks the plans for the Death Star (not the real plans of course-- Imperial engineers aren't dumb enough to put an unshielded reactor vent on the surface) to the rebels. Then he needs to make sure the plans get to the right place -- so he tracks Princess Leia's ship to Tattooine (damned if I know why they were in Tattooine orbit in the first place) and then attacks it, knowing that Leia Organa will transmit the plans to Obi Wan Kenobi, who he knows perfectly well is hiding out there.

Then... uhh, it gets complicated. He knows that the rebels plan to take the plans to their base on Alderaan, where they'll probably set up a full-on capital ship assault on the Death Star. This won't stand a chance of succeeding, he needs a small group of fighters to attack the Death Star to plausibly blow it up. So he has to blow the hell out of the main Rebel base on Alderaan. The rebels will need to take the plans to one of their smaller bases.

Next it's a simple matter of capturing Kenobi's ship and putting a tracking device on it. There's some difficulty in actually allowing the ship to escape again (preferably with Leia on it), so he distracts the stormtroopers with an epic lightsaber battle in the middle of the goddamn hangar deck.

Then it's just a simple matter of sidling the Death Star slowly up to Yavin, with its tiny fighter-centric base, waiting for the rebels to attack, using this as an excuse to get his own ass out of the Death Star (yeah, apparently I'm the only competent pilot on this enormous battle station), and pressing the self-destruct button at an appropriate moment. Boom!

Who benefits? Vader. By Episode 4 he's fallen out of the Emperor's favour and presence, commands a single star destroyer, and plays second fiddle to Grand Moff Tarkin on board the Death Star. The Empire no longer needs him -- he's an expert at hunting down opposition, but with the Death Star in play there will be no opposition pretty soon. But by Episode 5, the Emperor has figured out he has a major rebel problem and Vader is all of a sudden relevant again, commanding a Super Star Destroyer at the head of the Imperial Fleet.

[–]arjie 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Follow the money, eh? Smart.

[–]cyco 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Also, allowing the Death Star to be destroyed reduces the chances of his children being killed.

[–]GregLoire 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Great write-up, but...

He knows that the rebels plan to take the plans to their base on Alderaan, where they'll probably set up a full-on capital ship assault on the Death Star.

Wasn't Alderaan supposed to be a peaceful planet with no weapons?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Pfft, says Leia. We all know it's the headquarters of the Rebellion though.

I'm not sure where the big-ass Rebel fleet we see at the end of Empire was during the events of Episode 4. But there's no way the entire Rebel fleet was, at this stage, the three or four squadrons of fighters hanging out at Yavin.

[–]G3n0c1de 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I think Alderaan was more of a sympathizer planet. Remember, they were still one of the Empire's core worlds. They probably were pretty open that they didn't like the Empire, but they didn't have a formal military, they were under the Empire, and it was their job to provide defense. And it's Yavin that was the main Rebel base at the time. Alderaan is waaaay to high profile to run the Rebellion from. The Alliance bases were always on remote, out of the way planets.

Of course this wasn't the main Alliance fleet. The rest of the fleet was elsewhere, scattered throughout the outer and mid rims. There's a few reasons for this. The Yavin base was a secret. If a large number of Rebel ships were spotted hanging out there, then the Empire would have easily found the base. So there was no need to defend the space around Yavin if the enemy never knew they were there. Also, because the fleet was so small compared to the Imperial fleet, keeping them together is dangerous because they could be ambushed and taken down in one fell swoop. Every ship they had was valuable. So the Rebellion broke the fleet up into smaller task groups, each independent of the others. These groups were constantly on the move, they could not afford to stay in one place for very long.

The Rebels never planned for anything like the Death Star showing up on their front door, either. They planned to retreat into space as soon as the base was discovered, knowing that they wouldn't last against an Imperial siege of the world. If an Imperial fleet showed up, the Imperials would blockade the planet in a similar manner to Hoth, and land troops. The Rebel fighters were there only for the eventual breakout. During the actual evacuation of the Yavin base, the Rebels called in one of their fleet task groups to help break the blockade. In the battle, the Rebel transports took off, with the fighters from the planet engaging the blockaders. In the chaos many Rebel transports escaped.

So this makes the fighter attack against the Death Star pretty much a last ditch effort. The sudden arrival of the Death Star meant that the Rebels weren't prepared at all to evacuate. The only thing they could do was scramble fighters. They could have sent out word to get some help, but they might not have reached them in time, and the Death Star was designed to slug it out with entire fleets of capital ships and win. Luckily the Rebels had their Death Star plans. It was still a suicide attack, but they at least had a chance of survival. It was like a final hail Mary type of play.

[–]Bartleby986 43 points44 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I just don't know who to trust anymore...I didn't vote for Palpatine...but then again, none of us did. The galaxy would have been better off with Gore, but all that nonsense with The Floridian System really fucked things up.

[–]deanbmmv 83 points84 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Naboo voted for Palpatine. Naboo also voted in Jar-Jar Binks. Naboo fucking sucks.

[–]Joe_Kehr 20 points21 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Well, not only the planet Naboo is hollow; its inhabitants are too.

[–]Dusk_v731 14 points15 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Shouldve voted for Nader.

[–]SystemOutPrintln 32 points33 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

People like you are the reason Palpatine won.

[–]tehorhay 39 points40 points ago*

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

People like you are the reason we're stuck with the bs two party Jedi/Sith system. They're all the same anyway. Both beholden to their midichlorian overloards.

[–]ncrowley 45 points46 points ago*

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]mexipimpin 16 points17 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I'm not sure if the original pic is older or this video, but the vid takes the cake hands down.

[–]pajam 14 points15 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

You're all a bunch of drones! You're drones! Especially the drones.

[–]mplspoboy 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Came here to post this. way. the fuck. better.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Dude. A spoiler alert would have been nice.

[–][deleted] 18 points19 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Bruce Willis is a ghost.

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I think you're a bit confused. He did die at the end, but there was no evidence that he was a ghost. The two women that were fighting over him were immortal though, because of that anti-aging potion. Maybe that's what you're thinking of?

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I don't think we're talking about the same movie...

[–]arjie 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

We're talking about Fight Club. What are you talking about?

[–]plastick 10 points11 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

This is not Nam, this is bowling. There are rules.

[–]I_Contradict 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Dude! We're not supposed to talk about fight club. What the hell?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

And if he was a ghost he would never have had to break through that window with his feet. He would have just passed through it.

Besides, why would Marcellus Wallace tell a ghost to take a dive at a boxing match? Does Marcellus Wallace look like a bitch to you?

[–]maxcrabb 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Rosebud = his sled.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

CORUSCANT-Presiding over a memorial service commemorating the victims of the attack on the Death Star, the Emperor declared that while recent victories over the Rebel Alliance were "encouraging, the War on Terror is not over yet." "We will continue to fight these terrorists, and the rogue governments who harbor them, until the universe is safe, once and for all, and the security of the Neo-New Cosmic Order ensured."

It was one year ago today that the Death Star, perhaps the greatest symbol of the Empire's might, was destroyed in an attack by fanatic Rebels, who used small, single-person crafts to infiltrate seemingly impenetrable defenses. Thousands of mourners were on hand to remember and pay tribute to the victims and their families. "We lost our innocence that day," reflected one mourner. "I guess we thought we were immune from the kind of violence that happens in other galaxies. We were wrong." "I lost hundreds of buddies that day," said one teary-eyed Stormtrooper. "Guys whose only crime was trying make the Universe a safer place."

Although the day was colored by sadness, the mourners found some relief in the news of a decisive victory over the Rebels. In an attack led by Darth Vader, Empire forces were able to rout hundreds of Rebels from a network of caves underneath the surface of the planet Hoth. "We're not sure we got them all," says a Vader spokesman. "There are a lot of places to hide in those caves. But we've delivered a powerful blow to the terrorist's infrastructure, that's for sure. Today, the Empire has struck back."

Initial reports are unclear as to the fate of Luke Skywalker, a hero among the Rebels, who is rumored to have delivered the fatal blow to the Death Star. Skywalker, a former desert-dweller from the planet Tattooine, became a part of the Rebellion after family members were killed. Skywalker was trained by a militant wing of the Rebels, known as "Jedi Knights." Fanatical in their religious beliefs, the Jedi Knights claim to derive their power from the mystical "Force." It's believed that Skywalker was specifically trained by infamous terrorist O bin Wankanobi. Wankanobi, occasionally called "Ben" and easily recognized by his bearded visage and long, flowing robes, achieved near-martyr status among the Rebels after his death last year during a spy mission. His more fervent followers believe that Wankanobi lives on within them today, some even claiming to hear his voice during times of duress.

The attack on the Death Star came shortly after the Empire's destruction of Alderstaan, a planet whose government was known to harbor terrorists. Responding to criticism over the total annihilation of the planet, Vader stated, "There is no middle ground in the War on Terror. Those who harbor terrorists are terrorists themselves. Alderaan was issued ample warning. The fight for continuing Freedom is often burdened by terrible cost." The cost of this war can still be seen today in the continuing efforts to build a coalition government on Tattooine. Longstanding animosities among the planets various ethnic groups, including the Jawas, Tusken Raiders and scattered human settlers, have been an impediment to the peace process. The Empire continues to maintain a small peace keeping force until a provisional government is finally in place.

Much of the difficulty in fighting the Rebel forces stems from their lack of a central organizing structure. "They don't play by the traditional rules of war," complained one spokesman. "They come in all shapes and sizes, united only by their single-minded desire to destroy the Empire before it destroys them." The Emperor closed his comments today by stating that "the cowardly attack n the Death Star left a deep scar on the Empire. However, we will not stop fighting until every last evildoer has been brought to justice." He paused for several moments, wiping away a tear and then added with determination, "We will never forget."

[–]Beyssac 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

TL;DR

[–]sjk97 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Wankanobi

I'm really immature.

[–]The_Director 39 points40 points ago*

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

It's impossible to hit that exhaust port at that speed while being shot at. WAKE UP SHEEPLE

[–]Dresden_skyline 34 points35 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

It's not impossible. I used to bullls-eye womprats in my T-16 back home and their not much bigger than.......

[–]The_Director 17 points18 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

GET HIM!

[–]jksherm 18 points19 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

this was awesome but, and i know someones gonna get upset im getting to into this, the tie fighter darth vader used was heavily armored compared to the normal tie fighters and had alot of upgrades. http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/TIE_Advanced_x1

[–]jabrodo 6 points7 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

No, I did the same thing when someone called it a TIE Advanced. People need to the get their Expanded Universe straight.

[–]bitparity 25 points26 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Somehow, the use of comic sans font makes this seem more legit.

[–]alienzx 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

r/DeathStarTruth

[–]clayer30 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I hear they're gonna build a new, bigger one in its place.

[–]cyco 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

How convenient...

[–]zyrumtumtugger 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

WHY COMIC SANS.

[–]cdcox 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Here is an interesting discussion on why things like death stars will always have at least one crucial weakness and why our military should not get into the bad habit of building them. PDF warning

[–]Clit_Commander 22 points23 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

"Allah Jedi Akbar"

made me literally LOL!

[–]beatles910 28 points29 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Akbar wasn't a Jedi.

[–][deleted] 37 points38 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Just goes to show you how people misconstrue Jedi culture to further their own political ideology.

[–]fullofpudding 8 points9 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Shut it kilgore

[–]Battlesheep 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Have you seen how much money the empire is shelling out to equip it's troops with inferior E-11 blasters, and is it coincidence that Lord Vader is the majority share-holder of BlasTech Industries?

[–]mrzack 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]dogboyboy 65 points66 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

CS;DR

*comic sans; didn't read

[–]21echoes 73 points74 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

you mean... you didn't read the comic... in comic sans?

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

There are a few times when it's use is justified. This is one of them.

[–]Squidfist 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

From the perspective of someone who cares about typography; comic sans is never justified. Sure, at one point fonts were painstaking to create, and the selection was much more narrow, but now-a-days, there are thousands of free fonts being posted every day, so there is really no excuse.

Not caring about fonts is perfectly fine, so no foul on the creators part, but if you care enough to try to advocate terrible, then you should care enough to know better.

[–]KeytarVillain 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Only in a comic that uses comic-style art/text.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I assumed it was a deliberate choice to make it look like a poorly-designed conspiracy theorist's website.

[–]bofh 18 points19 points ago*

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Don't care what reddit's hipster dicktips think; can't be bothered to shorten it to a 'cute' acronym.

[–]hogger84 27 points28 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

dcwrhdt;cbbstoca

[–]bofh 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

well played.

[–]dogboyboy -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

typed this, click context, saw yours. deleted. karma for you.

[–]Yohnstoppable 21 points22 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I'm always amazed at how many people act snooty about the font on an image.

"As I twirl my neckbeard and adjust my monocle, I shall scoff at your font choice, you uncultured swine! And god help you if you save that image in a format that I wouldn't have noticed had I not looked at the extension just so I could bitch about it and look cool to people I"ll never meet"

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

You're right. I save my gasp of horror for Papyrus and Curlz.

[–]mainsworth 25 points26 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Comic sans really isn't that awful. Especially when it's normal sized text and is properly cased.

[–]Confucius_says 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

fortunately the whole thing is ripped off from this video so you can get the whole thing without comic sans, and it's funnier.

[–]Magzy 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

This is the Death Star, a fortune 500 company, please do not use comic sans.

[–]HardToImpress 6 points7 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

1st world problems

[–]ajr901 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Tears of appreciation came to my eye.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Cracked up at the Palpatine frame.

[–]OrigamiNinja 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

OMG, that was hilarious and brilliant.

[–]Byeuji 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Would have been better if the question at the end had been:

"Is it an excuse to invade Bespin to steal their tibanna?"

[–]Hoobleton 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

But the rebels were hiding on Hoth, those directly responsible for the attack on the Death Star were all shacked up there.

[–]EverGlow89 1 point2 points ago*

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The Rebel Alliance was not a Jedi Militant group. Jedi were thought to have died out long before then and Luke was not even a realized Jedi.

The fleet was of X-Wings and Y-Wings. The Y-Wing was a bomber that was actually supposed the be the starfighter to deliver the blow. The X-Wings were backups.

Luke was not the leader. Red Leader was Wedge Antilles.

There were over a million crew aboard the first Death Star - not merely thousands. (Edit: This is pointed out later in the graphic. Still, a contradiction)

Nobody knew or could know that Luke was Vader's son.

It says that the numerous explosions are suspicious. So what does the author think a "chain reaction" is?

There are limitless other planets to find oil on.. Many of which I would suspect to have more oil than an ice planet.

There were no young Sith - Rule of Two.

Vader's TIE Fighter was TIE Advance X1 and, though other TIE Fighters were without shields, Vader's prototype was not.

Also, if I was the author, I would have pointed out that the most suspicious thing was that Vader was not shot down - the TIE Fighter to his left simple crashed into him, sending him spiraling away. The kicker? The other fighter wasn't even shot. Really, watch the scene.

...Why am I doing this?

[–]zyguy 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

comic sans!!!!

[–]boatss 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Comic Sans is what makes me believe this 100%.

[–]SANDEMAN 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

comic sans

[–]iRedeRi 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

you forget the insurance policy they took out a week before "death start" incident

[–]Confucius_says 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

this little "comic strip" directly rips off this video.. the video is much funnier than the comic strip so if its not too late see the video first.

[–]cptnobvious21 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Allah Admiral Ackbar FTFY

[–]koew 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I fucking love me some Star Trek!

[–]Threemor 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Fuck everyone complaining about comic sans. It's funny.

[–]Ottersteak 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

You deserve an upvote, despite having used that horrible font.

[–]FearlessFreep 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I've seen humorous variations on the theme.

This was not one of them

[–]jaxspider 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Welcome to r/Starwars.

[–]OhJustNothing 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The Rebels are not a religious group. In fact, not many people even believed in the Force in the originals. "Just a bunch of cheap tricks and nonsense." Luke (and I suppose Kyle Katarn) was the only Jedi in the entire Rebel Alliance at the time.

Also, Luke was not leading the attack. He wasn't even Red Leader. He was just Red Five. The guy who fired the first torpedos that missed was the leader.

Luke wasn't hiding on Dagobah, but this is clearly told from the point of view of the Imperials, so I can let it go.

Fighters were deployed before the Rebels had even entered the trench.

Politically, Vader isn't that high in ranks with the Empire. His connection with the Emperor is purely social. He's lower than Tarkin in rank and often enters battle. He's part of the military and not a political figure. It's not out of the question that he would get into his TIE Advance, which has shields AND a hyperdrive, to enter the fray.

The rest is either correct or purely for humor so I won't pick on it.

TL;DR: The Rebel's are not a religious group, Luke didn't lead the attack and didn't hide on Dagobah, Fighters were deployed on time, Vader often goes into battle, and the TIE Advance is very well-equipped.

[–]whiskeryberg -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The terrorism is strong with this one.

[–]Tactful -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Conspiracy theories in general drive me up the fucking wall. Occam's Razor should prevail over idiocy, and yet some people are still so very stupid. And they're stubborn too; I can tolerate stubbornness when one has the intelligence to back it up, but saying "Well EXCUSE ME for taking an active interest in what my government is doing. You can stay in the dark with the other sheeple if you want, but I KNOW THE TRUTH" is just utterly ridiculous, especially considering these fucking nutjobs don't even do anything about it, they still go to work and Starbucks and pay their taxes to a government they think killed thousands of people on a whim.

If I ever legitimately believed that the British government organised the killings of hundreds of British citizens for terror-tastic purposes, I'd leave the country and never look back.

[–]prostars 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I can't believe you are getting downvotes. Everything you said, times 2.

[–]CoAmon 7 points8 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Because he's not providing a valid counterpoint to the argument that he is complaining about. He is also misusing Occam's razor, and committing several logical fallacies, all of which he is accusing the opposite side of.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Since when did the Death Star become a Death Ellipsoid?

[–]yrrp 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I thought this was going to be another repostish thing where Luke is a terrorist, innocent people died, sad stormtrooper, yada yada ya. But then when you started bringing up the conspiracy, I found it very interesting and funny.

[–]WezVC 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Reminds me of this.

[–]slipknot6477 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

didnt collegehumor already make a video about this?

[–]Indecisi0n 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

You need to read this book

[–]fullofpudding 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Awesome, you parodied both sides. Mad props.

[–]Olukon 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I usually find these pretty funny, but this one was kind of a miss for me.

[–]nickbfromct 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

this is awesome

[–]Stormy_Fairweather 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Haha, well done.

[–]MANNER_YOUR_MOM 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Vaders fighter wasn't just "lightly armored". Read the facts and play the games, commie.

[–]lorax108 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

that was perfect.

[–]mephaskapholies 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

another story about the opinion of the power house, ignoring the effects their war had on the people of the galaxy

[–]ojolejano 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I so wanna see this movie!

[–]banana-deathstar 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

As the only fruit left from the Death Star explosion, I can say with confidence that we've only just begun to peel away the layers. What lies at the core of the matter? We demand a commission!

[–]Almustafa 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Ever noticed how those missiles need to make a 90 degree turn? That's clearly impossible, the film is edited.

[–]b0utch 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The force is more real than you think, has anyone ever wonder where Lucas got the idea from?

[–]grog140 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I would like to know how the empire covered up them destroying an entire plant. Who cares about the death star. Doesn't anyone wonder what the fuck happened to Alderaan?

[–]ReddimusPrime 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

As seen on the Blu-Rays, Alderaan shot first.

[–]Gramarchist 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

INTENSIFY THE FORWARD BATTERIES I DON'T WANT ANY SPERGING TO GET THROUGH!

...TOO LATE!!!

[–]LavrentiyBeria 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

You win.

[–]planeteater 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

This is a ploy by the rebellion to swing people into their dying cause. If you look carefully The Emperor is reading to young Sith as we all know there are only two Sith, a master and his apprentice, this has been the way since Darth Bane. Come on people don't be sheep see the lies the rebellion are trying to get us to believe.

[–]Victor_Zsasz 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

clever. Well done.

[–]nickfury73 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

This should be way longer. Upvote for general awesomeness anyway.

[–]neonshadow 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

You forgot the part where the death star blew up a planet and killed billions of innocents.

[–]Lurking_Grue 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

We lost our peace moon!

[–]seoforgoogle 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I agree 100% with brandontoms

[–]N00bLinuXCraft 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

What! without any mention of the skywalker pardigm?

[–]Lucifurnace 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Thank you for this. I feel like the next time I watch Star Wars it will be so much better.

[–]MegaZeusThor 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Or is it to take away your religious freedoms to practice the force?

But in the Star Wars Universe, the force is at least real. You could show it does something, under controlled conditions.

[–]absentmindedjwc 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Pff... there is a difference... Hoff was a staging location for the terrorist rebel scum. It would be more appropriate if they invaded Kashyyyk. A planet that really didn't have much to do with anything.

[–]ThumpNuts 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Seems legit!

[–]BigNav 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I don't always read political satire - but when I do, it's always Star Wars themed.

[–]toastyghost 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

congratulations, bunch of free karma for reiterating every point from the "stormtruther" video collegehumor did like 3 years ago. people will upvote anything imgur.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The rebels supported the Jedi, but I do not think that makes them a religious extremist group. It was more about a political idealology and civil rights. But maybe I am looking too far into this.

[–]DunDerD 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Don't forget Lord Vaders connections with that wookie terrorist Chewbacca.

[–]ShAd0wS 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

This "article" was on reddit a while back and definitely falls under the same category. Here's a relevant thread from the comments there.

[–]snookonahook 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Brilliant. This galaxy is close to home.

[–]NotProductive 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Reminds me of that Clerks scene where they're talking about all the government contractors that would have died on it haha, good stuff.

[–]facepoppies 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

This right here, THIS is why I come to r/funny. Not for meme pictures with stupid one liners, not for personal life stories that aren't actually funny, or pie charts about jerking off. Give this bastard an upvote!

[–]the_horn 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

This is genius. Upvote.

[–]Ron735 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The only explanation is that ancient aliens and ghosts were working together.

[–]jcusack14 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]technomuslimah 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]BizAngel 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The more we trivialise and joke about the truth, the less power it holds. (Which is precisely what they want us to do)

[–]picsandnsfwonly 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

might as well just rewatch the trilogy and come up with my own joke if i have to read that

[–]numbakrunch 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Johnnie Cochran: ...ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, I have one final thing I want you to consider. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Chewbacca. Chewbacca is a Wookiee from the planet Kashyyyk. But Chewbacca lives on the planet Endor. Now think about it; that does not make sense!

Gerald Broflovski: Damn it! ... He's using the Chewbacca defense!

Johnnie Cochran: Why would a Wookiee, an 8-foot-tall Wookiee, want to live on Endor, with a bunch of 2-foot-tall Ewoks? That does not make sense! But more important, you have to ask yourself: What does this have to do with this case? Nothing. Ladies and gentlemen, it has nothing to do with this case! It does not make sense! Look at me. I'm a lawyer defending a major record company, and I'm talkin' about Chewbacca! Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I am not making any sense! None of this makes sense! And so you have to remember, when you're in that jury room deliberatin' and conjugatin' the Emancipation Proclamation, does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does not make sense! If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must acquit! The defense rests.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Now that I think about it, Vader getting out to fight was pretty damn convenient

[–]-Mew 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Each week, a 'new' thread drawing comparisons between the Death Star and Sept 11...

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Funny. Downvote for Comic-Sans.

[–]AllThatIsGold 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Would you people stop it with this shit?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Difference is how the World Trade Center wasn't a weapon.

[–]awkwardColor 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

comic sans!

[–]LordUnas 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

To whomever made this: I have no idea where you're going with this.

[–]HelpMeThink 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Those employees knew the risks before they took the job.

[–]imtwelveandwhatsthis 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

After almost every panel i went to upvote this.

[–]tekka444 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]Willeh 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Long ass comics like this seriously need a TL;DR.

[–]Stevoh 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

  1. IS THAT COMIC SANS? That looks very comic sansesque

  2. They weren't Jedis

  3. The Death Star destroyed the planet of Alderaan. The Empire wasn't exactly innocent.

Geez, this is so biased.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The problem with this theory is that Lord Vader, dissatisfied with the Grand Moff's incompetence, ordered his own personal wing of tie fighters to help fight off the attack when the Grand Moff refused to scramble all of them.

[–]DeBomb123 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

genious...

[–]brieker101 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I saw this on FunnyJunk still made me laugh tho

[–]wookiesandwich 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

retarded

[–]sammymcjack 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

COMIC SAAAAAANNNSSSS!

[–]superiority 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

allegations that Darth Vader is in fact the father of the pilot who destroyed the Death Star

That's the most ridiculous fucking thing I've ever heard. Goddamn truthers.

[–]Im_not_the_cops 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]BanzaiTree 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Saw Comic Sans. Closed tab.

[–]egamer01 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The contrasts drawn with this picture show one thing. Just how far you can stretch the true if you don't use logic, and ignore key facts. I think this illustrates just how most conspiracy theory's work. If that's what your were intending bravo well done.

[–]Hector_Kur 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The rebels weren't religious.