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1316
1317

One danger of a summer heat wave (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by cosmando

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all 168 comments
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[–]AcerRubrum 22 points23 points ago

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the only reason to ever buy Otter Pops is if you like the feel of the smaller pops, or if you are charmed by puns

I'm looking at you, Reddit ಠ_ಠ

[–]fart_sack 35 points36 points ago

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No, Reddit's version would include "Statutory Grape"

[–]realberbersilver 56 points57 points ago

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"Lemon Party"

"Some of my Best Friends are Blackberry"

"This Kills the Crab-Apple"

"Pedo Pear"

[–]silentjudas 1 point2 points ago

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Well....well done sir.

[–]realberbersilver 24 points25 points ago*

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"Trolologanberry"

"Mangoes, How Do They Work?"

"Not Sure if Cherry, or just Red"

"Everyday I'm Plantain'"

[–]Borkz 176 points177 points ago

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Youre buying the wrong pops.

[–]bedintruder 36 points37 points ago

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So here's the deal: Since Fla-Vor-Ice and Otter Pops are the exact same product, made by the same company, and since you get twice as much Fla-Vor-Ice for the same price, the only reason to ever buy Otter Pops is if you like the feel of the smaller pops, or if you are charmed by puns like, "Alexander the Grape" and non-puns like, "Sir Isaac Lime" or "Pancho Punch".

Damnit. Where was this site a couple years ago when I got into an argument on another forum about how Otter Pops are no different from Flavorice

[–]Borkz 23 points24 points ago

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Probably in the same place.

(Posted 7/8/05 by Kirk)

[–]bedintruder 1 point2 points ago

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You're right, though my quick estimate of a "couple years" was wishful thinking. This argument took during high school and I graduated in 2005.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]psiphre 9 points10 points ago

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one = 1

"a couple" = 2

"a few" = 3

"several" = 4

"a bunch" = 5 OR 6

"lots" = 7+

only heathens will disagree.

[–]shadow1515 8 points9 points ago

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WELL THEN SHIP ME OFF TO THE HEATHENARIUM, BECAUSE YOU ARE WRONG, SIR.

[–]Ryllis 4 points5 points ago

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Several = 7. 4 is a bunch.

[–]psiphre 2 points3 points ago

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do you ever buy a "bunch" of bananas with only 4 bananas?

heathen.

[–]kinsey3 1 point2 points ago

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Yes, "several" is 7-ish. "A few" is 3 or 4, and "a handful" is 5 or 6. What "a bunch" is doing on this list, I don't know.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]MrBrickles 1 point2 points ago

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Did you read your own link? Did you not see number 14? Is it not YOU the one that is trolling?

[–]Pizbit 1 point2 points ago

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It's one of those words that have a perfectly sound dictionary meaning that is often completely ignored and used to mean 2 or 3.

[–]happytime1711 0 points1 point ago

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Not well known, but dictionaries list word usages and that includes common misusages. I saw a dictionary that listed biannually as meaning "twice per year," or "once every two years." Only the second one is correct, but people often use it to mean twice per year, which should be semiannually.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]mosheisley 1 point2 points ago

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While a super awesome point, if any of y'all redditing suckas wanna get technical, OP didnt say "a couple of". Just "couple of". So, while I respect your putting down capt butthead over here, he maye still be right.

couple will always be synonymous with "a few" in my world though. fuck any other shit.

[–]cos1ne 0 points1 point ago

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I can confirm that in some parts of the US a couple can refer to a few.

It's the evolution of a living language my friend.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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In Burlington, MA on a Endurance International Group server?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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The both are water and sugar, scandal!

[–]the_scorpion_stings 2 points3 points ago

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But, but... it has fruit juice!

[–]cosmando[S] 62 points63 points ago

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Let's not turn this into a theological debate!

[–]wtb2612 10 points11 points ago

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Are Otter Pops regional or something? I've never seen them and I've eaten a buttload of freeze pops in my life.

[–]SSChicken 7 points8 points ago

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I've had more Otter Pops than I can count, but I never knew a thing called Freeze Pops existed.

This is how wars are started...

[–]scy1192 4 points5 points ago

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freeze pops is the generic name

[–]dnalloheoj 6 points7 points ago

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I'm with you. I'm from Minnesota and I've never heard of this crazy so-called "Otter Pop."

Hell, I didn't even know it was a Fla-Vor-Ice, to me they're just called freezies.

[–]exoendo 0 points1 point ago

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why do you have freezies in minnesota? ಠ_ಠ

[–]FuriousJ 16 points17 points ago

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I was so happy until I read this, now I just feel empty inside, thinking of all those times I finished an otter pop, and sat on the couch thinking...Man I wish there was 50% more of that.

[–]BeyondTomorrow 7 points8 points ago

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First world problem right there

[–]toinfinitiandbeyond 0 points1 point ago

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I'm not so sure he was "outside".

[–]InTheZone1 6 points7 points ago

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FUCK THIS

[–]commandermuffin 5 points6 points ago

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It's all about the asian ones!

[–]stevesonaplane 0 points1 point ago

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My grandma used to get those. Wow. I'm gonna get a bag tomorrow.

[–]kevtastic 0 points1 point ago

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What are they called?

[–]stevesonaplane 0 points1 point ago

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Not sure, just know the shape. Never got around to getting a bag.

[–]PeacekeeperAl 2 points3 points ago

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at least he didn't buy Mr. Freeze Pops, he could have choked on them!

[–]kmack 2 points3 points ago

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TIL blue was raspberry! I always thought it just tasted like blue...

[–]he_speaks_the_truth 1 point2 points ago

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Everyone knows it' all about the freezies.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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For Australians, there was only one...

[–]Abdullah-Oblongata 1 point2 points ago

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Interesting, there's a website for everything isn't there.

[–]duhon78 1 point2 points ago

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[Bolis] were always my favorite... (http://www.juanofwords.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/Bolis.jpg)

[–]rabidcat 0 points1 point ago

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I hated them. They were too hard to suck out of the thing.

[–]duhon78 2 points3 points ago

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You have to gnaw, THEN suck. :p

[–]Morbidgrass 0 points1 point ago

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It's around 3.50 for a 100 pack of otter pops. Who the hell is paying 3 bucks for 18?

[–]dnalloheoj 1 point2 points ago

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Seriously. Just bought 200 for 5.95 from Sam's Club a couple weeks ago.

[–]chokeholder 0 points1 point ago

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otter pops are like $4 for a box of 200

[–]shadow1515 0 points1 point ago

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I can tell you from years of personal experience that flavor ice is just as dangerous.

[–]OtterPops 0 points1 point ago

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LIES!!!

[–]Justavian 0 points1 point ago

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What the fuck? Is this person ripping off Cockeyed or what? He even has a "How much is inside" just like Rob.... I know Cockeyed has been around for the past ten years...

Oh. I can cut myself off now. I see that he even says it's inspired by cockeyed. He's forgiven now.

[–]NismoPlsr 0 points1 point ago

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Hmph. I am always partial to Kool Pops.

[–]OtterPopsForEveryone 0 points1 point ago

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Oh man, now I'm going to be stuck with a bunch of extras.

[–]twille -1 points0 points ago

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no!

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points ago

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This happened to me until I realized I could just cut diagonally on each side after cutting off the top.

tl;dr: /¯\ > |¯|

[–]silentjudas 0 points1 point ago

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amen

[–]BHSPitMonkey 0 points1 point ago

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Yep. I think more recently I've just been cutting an arc, though.

[–]sparesome 12 points13 points ago

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It's like a SAW Puzzle. But instead of your life, you get sweet ice pop.

[–]yokiedinosaur 7 points8 points ago

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Forget Otter Pops and Flavorice. Bolis are where it's at.

[–]QueenNavy 0 points1 point ago

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those are good.

[–]poundcakess 39 points40 points ago

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http://www.reddit.com/r/fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu/comments/j7sxf/wanna_know_how_i_got_these_scars/

[–]cosmando[S] 1 point2 points ago

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I figured somebody else has had the same idea here.
If it's any consolation, I unsubscribed from f7u12 quite a while ago and I've not seen that comic.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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I hate rage faces and there's just something about yours that makes me laugh hard. Thank you, cosmando.

[–]cosmando[S] 1 point2 points ago

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Thank you, uh... anusdestroyer.

[–]funinsunhotdogbun 10 points11 points ago

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That Little Orphan Orange one is just downright depressing.

[–]cosmando[S] 3 points4 points ago

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I always found her lack of a top disturbing.

[–]jeffAA 3 points4 points ago

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I thought I was the only one. Glad to know other's shared my pain.

[–]13asjuhh 2 points3 points ago

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Please explain this one to me, we dont have otter pops on holland :P

[–]mazurtommy 9 points10 points ago

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They were juice that you could freeze, but when you cut the top off it ALWAYS cut your sides of your mouth. It was pretty much the equivalent of stepping on a Lego but for your mouth.

[–]Mindle 4 points5 points ago

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It isn't just that brand it is those types of popsicles. The plastic flaps on the side will cut the side of your mouth.

[–]cosmando[S] 3 points4 points ago

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The fact they're dirt cheap, tasty, but not at all filling also leads to frequent over-consumption.

[–]haiku_robot 4 points5 points ago

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Please explain this one 
to me, we dont have otter 
pops on holland :P

[–]daspoonman 2 points3 points ago

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man the top of his mouth must be really fucked up

[–]sadhoboclown 2 points3 points ago

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Alexander the Grape FTW

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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yeah, i have always wondered why they have never tried another design.

[–]Mox_FcCloud 1 point2 points ago

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Little orphan orange is my favorite, because he's an orphan.

[–]ecchimaru 1 point2 points ago

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that's a she, and i think they're going off Annie with her dog there

[–]xwreq 1 point2 points ago

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upvote for nostalgia

[–]m4rauder 1 point2 points ago

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Another danger of a summer heat wave

[–]SSChicken 1 point2 points ago

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Otter pops USED to have fun characters on them, now all they have is choking hazard warnings, ingredient lists, and the daily value table.. Something about that makes them less exciting than when I was a kid :(

[–]rossome 1 point2 points ago

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I always turned them 90 degrees to the side. The sides don't cut the top and bottom of your lips. :)

[–]cosmando[S] 2 points3 points ago

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At first I thought you meant you ate them in a harmonica like fashion.
Now I want to try that.

[–]Mindflux 0 points1 point ago

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Isn't this obvious? You don't put the sides (where the plastic is fused together) against your lips. Holding it flat (like a flute or something) has always been the way I've done it, ALWAYS. COMMON SENSE.

[–]Mindflux 1 point2 points ago

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BLUE IS THE BEST

[–]thatguyferg 1 point2 points ago

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I can honestly say I have never had Otter Pops...only flavor-ice and then cheap-ass other ones.

[–]coparker 1 point2 points ago

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I always cut the ends off in an arc shape, so as to avoid there being such strong and sharp corners to cut open your god damned face.

[–]michaelburns 0 points1 point ago

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I did the same thing.

[–]sirpico 1 point2 points ago

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I've been on Reddit all day and this is the only lol I've had yet.

[–]ohmyshit 1 point2 points ago

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These comments suck.

[–]liveat60fps 7 points8 points ago

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Icy what you did there.

[–]AZJeepDude 4 points5 points ago

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He otter know better.

[–]cosmando[S] 4 points5 points ago

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Hey guys, take a chill pill.

[–]Dr_Hook 1 point2 points ago

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How are you people eating these things?! I've seen multiple posts about cutting your mouths on otter pops/ flavor ice pops, but not once has this ever happened to me (and I've eaten literrally dozens in a single sitting)

[–]garatron 1 point2 points ago

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already posted last month.

http://i.imgur.com/7j40X.jpg

[–]dontgetlostinheaven 0 points1 point ago

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Still available for purchase ...

http://mybrands.com/Product.aspx?pid=644

[–]ScrewNutNbolt 0 points1 point ago

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Worth it!

[–]Soccer2750 0 points1 point ago

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John Heffron

[–]JarlKvack 0 points1 point ago

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YES. JUST YES!

[–]alohroh 0 points1 point ago

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Anyone ever try the 100% fruit juice flavor ices/otter pops? They're so much tastier and has a slushier texture

[–]Prophessur 0 points1 point ago

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I've never in my life cut myself with an Otter Pop.

I must know some secret.

[–]TehSlippy 0 points1 point ago

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I have never cut my mouth with these, but I can see how if someone weren't careful they might.

[–]NerdBot9000 0 points1 point ago

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This has been done before.

[–]Dude_Manguy 0 points1 point ago

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Jesus, thank god I'm not the only one. It hurts, I can feel it slicing through my cheeks. But Otter slush is soooo yummy.... Pleasure, pain, pleasure, pain. Maybe should xpost to /r/bdsm...

[–]suacy 0 points1 point ago

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Where did you get the vintage otter pops?

[–]Mordred19 0 points1 point ago

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it's a damn miracle I never choked to death on those things.

[–]MoonBanana 0 points1 point ago

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http://www.reddit.com/r/fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu/comments/j7sxf/wanna_know_how_i_got_these_scars/

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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1 month too late, but still a good bit.

[–]pbaydari 0 points1 point ago

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This was my guess.

[–]red_mercer 0 points1 point ago

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Slip one or two down the neck of your bong for extra refreshment

[–]commandermuffin 0 points1 point ago

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My father....was an ice cream man..and a friend!

[–]theroarer 0 points1 point ago

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No one believes me that I hate these things- because they hurt the sides if my mouth.

[–]Otter_Slaughter 0 points1 point ago

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If only I could think of something funny to say.

[–]meatlikeproduct 0 points1 point ago

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I've been wondering what otter pops were since the second season of big bang theory

[–]sndzag1 0 points1 point ago

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I winced. Really bad.

Do not remind me of pulling one of those out too fast.

[–]skinny_lips 0 points1 point ago

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hahaha

[–]yogurtshwartz 0 points1 point ago

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omg so true

[–]drterdsmack 0 points1 point ago

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got a case. rocked my g/f's mind

[–]vapulate 0 points1 point ago

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I can never eat just one of those things. I always eat 5-10 per sitting and stare at the plastic holocaust on the coffee table in shame while my dog tries to lick the remaining juice that didn't come up the sides.

[–]creamies 0 points1 point ago

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Too soon.

[–]Mannabell 0 points1 point ago

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Oh my god....flashbacks!!!

[–]ItsDangerousForABear 0 points1 point ago

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I actually have scars from those... oh what it was like to be a child.

[–]Vcookie 0 points1 point ago

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If you combine the 3rd and 4th otter, you get Jamie from Mythbusters!

[–]CrunxMan 0 points1 point ago

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Strawberry is a whore and a liar.

[–]hypmoden 0 points1 point ago

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TIL what Otter Pops are

[–]soggy_cereal 0 points1 point ago*

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Rule 34 on Otter Pops.

Rule 34 on the Joker's scars.

[–]Hector_Kur 0 points1 point ago

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I don't get it. D:

[–]Jubtron 0 points1 point ago

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I feel like they should have gone for the more obvious "Sacre Blue Raspberry"

[–]froderick 0 points1 point ago

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Not familiar with otter pops. Do they rip your mouth or something?

[–]clakstin 0 points1 point ago

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Hey look...Joker's O-Face

[–]SpikeWolfwood 0 points1 point ago

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I tried to buy some of these just last night but I guess that the world has gone mad because I can't think of any other reason as to why they aren't stocked by my local Vons.

[–]jamesh777 0 points1 point ago

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Little orphan orange...?

[–]ZDragon 0 points1 point ago

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Am even bigger danger... Electricity went out for all of Southern California!

[–]ayraerae 0 points1 point ago

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I miss that guy... ;______;

[–]ChopinLives81 0 points1 point ago

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I'm just gonna leave this right here, made it a few months ago... http://i.imgur.com/nPSgB.png

[–]balbo_biggins 0 points1 point ago

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It appears that you have ability to predict the future. I suggest a trip to vegas, some petty cash, and a can do attitude.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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le

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Yes. That is one of the stupidest thing abour rage comics.

[–]bigchallah -2 points-1 points ago

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I did it first and this isn't even the first ripoff.

[–]cosmando[S] 0 points1 point ago

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You certainly didn't do it first. Some other guy in this thread posted a link to his rage comic from 3 months ago.
It's obviously not a particularly hard connection to come by.

[–]carltoncrisp -1 points0 points ago

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During long car rides, my wife and I like to dork out and think of new otter pop flavors. Melon Keller, Robert T. Leef, Boysenberry Bonds, Albert Limestein, ect.

[–]TheMightyBarabajagal -1 points0 points ago

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This is the hardest I've lol'ed all week.

[–]NoApollonia -1 points0 points ago

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Hilarious - just finished watching this movie (probably at least the tenth time) about a half hour ago.

[–]Provenzer0 -1 points0 points ago

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I don't usually LOL, but I just did. Must read in his voice.

[–]happytime1711 -1 points0 points ago

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I laughed way too hard at this.

[–]PvtJoker1987 -1 points0 points ago

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true lol

[–]Five_deadly_venoms -1 points0 points ago

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This is shear genius. /claps

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