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WTF

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top 200 commentsshow all 223

[–]Thaery 130 points131 points ago

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Ace Rimmer. There'll be time for explanations later—and, hopefully, some sex.

[–]sophalope 30 points31 points ago

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See ya later, alligator!

[–]jcsr 359 points360 points ago

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Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast!

[–]Minimumtyp 65 points66 points ago

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I love it when I can predict the top comment.

[–][deleted] ago*

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[deleted]

[–]Supersteve101 24 points25 points ago

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Damn American folk, stop stealing our shows and making them crap.

[–]Minimumtyp 4 points5 points ago

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Just be happy you don't have to deal with the Australian version of Top Gear.

[–]SithisTheDreadFather 3 points4 points ago

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What about the American version? Ugh

[–]Creepwood 4 points5 points ago

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They tried with Red Dwarf. I think a pilot got made. It felt like that episode Back to Reality, where they see different people playing "them" in the VR.

[–]RichardBachman 1 point2 points ago

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Hey, you take that back. The Office is hilarious, both versions.

[–]Supersteve101 5 points6 points ago

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The American version of The Office doesn't exist as far as I am concerned. Good day sir!

[–]Creepwood 0 points1 point ago

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It's roughly ten times funnier. I love Ricky Gervais, but the American Office started out trying to do the same thing but found their own, much funnier way of doing things.

[–]Clutter 7 points8 points ago

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I thought both were unfunny. I never enjoyed humor based on discomfort, which is basically what both of them function on.

[–]Huffers 8 points9 points ago

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[–]RyVal[S] 0 points1 point ago

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was that Liam Neeson at the beginning?

[–]dacezza 1 point2 points ago

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They did make a pilot over the water but i have not seen it. Anyone else here seen it?

[–]MaximusQuackhandle 10 points11 points ago

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Yes, DO NOT WATCH!.

[–]cwstjnobbs 1 point2 points ago

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I watched it, it was shit.

[–]dizzylynn 0 points1 point ago

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Don't watch it. It will burn your eyes.

[–]megret 0 points1 point ago

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The whole series is streaming on Netflix.

[–][deleted] 23 points24 points ago

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SMAKIBBFB

[–]RiW-Kirby 4 points5 points ago

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I may need to start using this.

[–]gybryant 3 points4 points ago

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You forgot skipper.

[–]stopmotionporn 2 points3 points ago

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*does a halfhearted loop de loop"

[–]Maxamillionaire 1 point2 points ago

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Souper.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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Smeghead

[–]danielxcubed 32 points33 points ago

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Stoke me a clipper, I will be -ugggghhh.

[–]Robolo 11 points12 points ago

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What a guy!

[–]Maxamillionaire 3 points4 points ago

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...If you're interested, I'll be in my quarters, covered in maple syrup.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Lunch is on Millie.

[–]Trolly_McTrollerson 0 points1 point ago

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Stoke me a clipper, I'll be back in time for Christmas!

[–]SubcommanderShran 69 points70 points ago

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You missed the part when the alligator fell on a Nazi. God bless the British, they really tell great Nazi jokes.

[–]Minimumtyp 35 points36 points ago

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That's Ace Rimmer. We're lucky to be alive.

[–]InfoSec812 10 points11 points ago

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Das war Ace Rimmer, haben wir Glück, lebendig zu sein!

[–]Hypersapien 2 points3 points ago

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*THUD*

[–]phuxen 9 points10 points ago

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I bet he's a sauerkraut

[–]Predator_ -1 points0 points ago

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I did nazi that coming.

[–]MegaProtestAndMe 42 points43 points ago

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For those interested. This show (Red Dwarf) is on Netflix. I believe every season (1-8) is there.

[–]Minimumtyp 21 points22 points ago

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I feel like a hipster. I have them all on DVD.

[–]fiyerotiggular 38 points39 points ago

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I have the VHS

[–]eastlondonmandem 24 points25 points ago

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I have original VHS recorded from the TV.

[–]phuxen 10 points11 points ago

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I have VHS recorded from the TV with hand drawn covers.

[–]sarsaparilla 3 points4 points ago

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need pics. now.

[–]prometheus1981 2 points3 points ago

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I have them on Beta Max... heh!

[–]vmos 2 points3 points ago

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Mine don't have hand drawn covers but the labels are written with a different colour pen for each series

[–]robl326 1 point2 points ago

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Me too, but I don't have a VCR anymore.

[–]guntotingliberal 4 points5 points ago

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You should get one. They are awful to behold and yet they were the cat's pajamas once upon a time.

[–]BoOnDoXeY 2 points3 points ago

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"the cats pajamas" I LOL'd.

Have an upvote!

[–]Jottor 1 point2 points ago

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So did I, but after 4 years of no VCR (and 5 years of not watching them, because I have them on DVD), I threw them all away.

[–]eastlondonmandem 0 points1 point ago

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I might never ever play them again but at the very least I can prove my worth by telling anyone who's interested that I in fact have the original TV series recorded onto VHS. You have lost that privilege by throwing them away.

[–]Jottor 1 point2 points ago

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And now I'm sad.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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I have the book of 'Better than Life'.

[–]PancakePirate 5 points6 points ago

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you win

[–]HyzerFlip -1 points0 points ago

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I just watched many of them when I was young. Never purchased. Glad I didn't... Netflix can be awesome.

[–]jennyleigh713 0 points1 point ago

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Really? I've watched it all more than 10 times over and still love the fuck out of it. I would be sad if I didn't own them. Let alone the fact that I couldn't infect others with it if I didn't own it.

[–]HyzerFlip 0 points1 point ago

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Well since its on Netflix now I can watch whenever and no changing discs.

[–]jennyleigh713 0 points1 point ago

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I'm weird and probably overly concerned with owning things, but I really like that they are mine. Watch the commentaries if ever you have the chance! They are delightful!

[–]HyzerFlip 1 point2 points ago

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I tend to like so many things that by the time I would watch them all once I would back shelf them until I no longer had any way to play them with or something.

I have all but stopped buying movies and shows.

I will totally be watching rd soon though.

[–]cwstjnobbs 0 points1 point ago

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I got the Smeg Ups on VHS but no player...

[–]sartreofthesuburbs 0 points1 point ago

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I have them on vinyl.

[–]BraveSirRobin 0 points1 point ago

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I have both the Japanese versions and the UK ones. There have been various edits of the show over the years. UK ones are best but weren't available on digital formats until long after the far east ones.

Why RD is so popular in Japan is anyones guess.

[–]eastlondonmandem 6 points7 points ago

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Red Dwarf can not be hipster. It breaks all sorts of unbreakable universal laws.

[–]Minimumtyp 7 points8 points ago*

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Space corp directive 196156: Awesome stuff can never be hipster.

[–]halftone84 2 points3 points ago

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Space corp directive 196156

[–]keozen 23 points24 points ago

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196156?

All senior officers must wear slippers when in the sleeping quarters of those of equal or higher rank?

I really don't see how that applies here sir.

[–]halftone84 13 points14 points ago

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No, 196156 would be, Any officer caught sniffing the saddle of the exercise bicycle in the women's gym will be discharged without trial.

[–]InfoSec812 0 points1 point ago

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[–]Minimumtyp 1 point2 points ago

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I read relevant, instantly thought of our best friend "relevant_rule34," thought DO NOT CLICK ON LINKS SOME THINGS CANT BE UNSEEN, then I realised it was a false alarm.

Just sharing.

[–]stopmotionporn 4 points5 points ago*

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Space corp directive 196156?

No officer with false teeth shall have oral sex in zero gravity?

I am not sure how that applies to our situation sir.

[–]Minimumtyp 0 points1 point ago

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Oh god that's so much better. Fixed.

[–]Vyr 3 points4 points ago

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And it spells out "Red Dwarf" on the sides if you line em up.

[–]Wrym 1 point2 points ago

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I have them all on TIV.

[–]rtpmatt 3 points4 points ago

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The ones on Netflix are the remastered. People should look for the DVDs/VHS' as they are to original.

/hipster

[–]trogdorkiller 4 points5 points ago

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You just made my day. I used to watch that every Saturday night on PBS. Loved the end credits theme.

[–]StuartGibson 2 points3 points ago

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Poor Jenna Russell never had an end credit for singing the theme song.

[–]Spider_Riviera 0 points1 point ago

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Thank you, I have the full theme on my mp3 player and wanted to know the artist to name it properly.

[–]StuartGibson 0 points1 point ago

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Composed by Howard Goodall in case ou need that too.

[–]Spider_Riviera 0 points1 point ago

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I did know that actually, but thank you anyway. :-)

[–]dizzylynn 1 point2 points ago

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Yeah, but Netflix has the remastered versions. :(

[–]powelly 0 points1 point ago

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But only watch the first 4 seasons

[–]mitsusproogi 14 points15 points ago

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"6 seasons"

[–]cadav 6 points7 points ago

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This man is right, first 6.

[–]Vole85 2 points3 points ago

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These two guys are the most correct. It's just when they say "Season", they mean "Series".

My review:

  1. Brilliant opening to a new series. You get to know the characters. Solid comedy. Everything is grey.

  2. The characters really grow. Some fantastic dialog. Crappy, yet amazing sets. More colour.

  3. Some episodes went slightly downhill. The introduction of Robert Llewellyn is great.

  4. Really great series. Watch it.

  5. Really great series. Watch it.

  6. Really great series. Watch it. Most of it is genius.

  7. Remove one of the greatest characters in comedy history and replace it with boobs. Rob Grant leaves as co writer. Replace some of the greatest model shots produced with cheap CGI effects. Plus note is that Howard Goodall wrote some actual scores.

  8. This seems to be quite popular, but it wasn't the Red Dwarf that they spent a decade(?) making. Why change a winning formula?

This being said, my favourite series is series 2. I still watch series 7 & 8 every now and then.

Did I mention I love Red Dwarf?

[–]jennyleigh713 0 points1 point ago

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3 is my fav, but mostly because of Kryten. Quarantine, best spisode ever! Rimmer in the gingham dress! Oooh love it!

[–]brantyr 1 point2 points ago

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Second, third, fourth and fifth seasons

[–]dizzylynn 0 points1 point ago

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First season, if only for the background to understand the premise of the show.

[–]Jottor 4 points5 points ago

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Whaaaaat? 1st season has loads of awesome stuff - Like Rimmer², "Todays fish is Trout a la creme"*6 and "See you later alligator", played at a funeral!

[–]jampants 2 points3 points ago

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FEEESH! Maybe later I'm going to try and have sex with something! Ooooow!

[–]Jottor 6 points7 points ago

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Cat prancing down the corridor, spraying his cologne on everything - "This is mine, and this is mine, and all these are mine.... All these things are mine! Except THAT bit! I don't want THAT bit!"

[–]Hypersapien 5 points6 points ago

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Lister: What are you doing?

Cat: Courting

Lister: Courting what?

Cat: I don't know. Whatever comes along.

[–]Minimumtyp 2 points3 points ago

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Fish! Today's fish is trout a la creme. Enjoy your meal. Fish! Today's fish is trout a la creme. Enjoy your meal. Fish! Today's fish is trout a la creme. Enjoy your meal. Fish! Today's fish is trout a la creme. Enjoy your meal. Fish! Today's fish is trout a la creme. Enjoy your meal.

I will.

[–]Hypersapien 1 point2 points ago

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Kochanski: ...Rimmer?

Rimmer: Yes, ma'am?

Kochanski: Have sex with someone, and that's an order.

Rimmer: Yes, ma'am. Right away, ma'am.

Lister: (hands Rimmer a business card) Here — ring this number, say I sent you. Tell them it's an emergency.

[–]dizzylynn 0 points1 point ago

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Agreed, I love the first season too... but I've noticed it is definitely a matter of taste. Some people just don't enjoy it - but they need it for the background at the VERY least.

[–]inventorjoe 0 points1 point ago

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whatever you do, don't go and watch the movie...it's depressing how old they all look :(

[–]TheGogglesDidNothing 0 points1 point ago

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It's also on Amazon Prime instant video (free with Prime membership)

[–]UNITBlackArchive 31 points32 points ago

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Here's the full clip, courtesy of the BBC via Youtube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gXYfnWRp1Q0

[–]Alacritous 151 points152 points ago

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What a guy.

[–]dalectrics 47 points48 points ago

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What a guy.

[–]fiyerotiggular 43 points44 points ago

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What a guy.

[–]teraspawn 34 points35 points ago

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What a guy.

[–]Neuromancer4242 33 points34 points ago

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What a guy.

[–]o0000o 30 points31 points ago

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What a guy.

[–]Secret7000 38 points39 points ago

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Was für ein kerl.

[–]Krispykiwi 30 points31 points ago

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What a guy.

[–]Deinosmos 19 points20 points ago

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What a guy.

[–]treepleshop 21 points22 points ago

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What a guy.

[–]ellimayhem 35 points36 points ago

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If you're in trouble he will save the day
He's brave and he's fearless come what may
Without him the mission would go astray

[–]jeramey 18 points19 points ago

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[–]Teotwawki69 11 points12 points ago

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I still remember the first time I saw the Rimmer Winkie song on Red Dwarf. Something about the ridiculousness of the visuals combined with Chris Barrie taking it absolutely seriously just made me lose it. Real laughter was produced.

[–]ellimayhem 10 points11 points ago

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He's also a fantastic swimmer!

[–]ScampAndFries 6 points7 points ago

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He's never been mistaken for Yul Brynner. He's not bald, and his head doesn't glimmer.

[–]hybridtheorist 4 points5 points ago

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More reliable than a garden strimmer

He'll never need a zimmer!

[–]ZimbuMGK 2 points3 points ago

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"BSc, SSc, whats that?" "Bronze Swimming Certificate, Silver Swimming Certificate"

[–]AlkalineDuck 1 point2 points ago

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This video contains content from Channel 4, who has blocked it in your country on copyright grounds.

The fuck? It's not even a Channel 4 show.

[–]PawFox 1 point2 points ago

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Yeah, I just got that as well and I live in the UK too.

[–]zmmar007 1 point2 points ago

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Toodle Pipski

[–]jeannedark 16 points17 points ago

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Ace Rimmer! How can you WTF at Ace Rimmer!

[–]digeridude 8 points9 points ago

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Your nickname was never Ace. Maybe Ace-hole!

[–]Tigeroovy 9 points10 points ago

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Smeg head.

[–]eastlondonmandem 3 points4 points ago

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Smeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeggggggggg

[–]Tigeroovy 7 points8 points ago

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You're such a Sme... A SMEEE. A SMEEEEEEEG HEEEEEEEEEEEED.

[–]zeritor 5 points6 points ago

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It's an nnnnnnn... It's an nnnnnnn... It's a banana. I can't say it!

[–]PeppermintNightmare 35 points36 points ago

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INTERIOR CROCODILE ALLIGATOR !

[–]Anticreativity 13 points14 points ago

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I DRIVE A CHEVROLET MOVIE THEATER.

[–]ShoopsSC 6 points7 points ago

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[–]stevesonaplane 0 points1 point ago

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Full freestyle. You found it bitch.

[–]Bloodonthewing 7 points8 points ago

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Without him life would be much grrimmah!

[–]tokenpoke 8 points9 points ago

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"Make love to me" "Sory mate, Lunch is on Mindy"

[–]Secret7000 10 points11 points ago

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"If you're interested, I'll be in my quarters at lunchtime, covered in taramasalata."

"Didn't realise your bread was buttered that side, Bongo".

"It isn't. I've been happily married for 35 years. It's just a chap like you can turn a guy's head."

"I'm sorry Bongo, lunch is... on Mellie."

"Would it make any difference if it was hummus?"

[–]tokenpoke 0 points1 point ago

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you articulated my stoned ramblings PERFECTLY

[–]Jonalewie 5 points6 points ago

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[–]Minimumtyp 3 points4 points ago

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Holy fuck. Everything would be... dude. Woah.

[–]jennyleigh713 0 points1 point ago

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Ok, that's more WTF than anything I've seen on /wtf.

[–]pjdavis 7 points8 points ago

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Morning, Lister! How's life in hippie heaven, you pregnant baboon-bellied space beatnik? What's the plan for the day, then? Slobbing in the morning, followed by slobbing in the afternoon, then a bit of a snooze before the main evening's slob? God, you're a disgrace to the species.

[–]Minimumtyp 4 points5 points ago

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Does anyone want some toast?

[–]pjdavis 2 points3 points ago

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Look, I don't want any toast, he doesn't want any toast. In fact no one around here wants any toast. Not now, not ever. No toast.

[–]LovelyLittleBiscuit 2 points3 points ago

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How about a muffin?

[–]pjdavis 2 points3 points ago

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Or muffins… Or muffins, we don't even like muffins around here. We want no muffins, no toast, no teacakes, no buns, baps, baguettes or bagels, no croissants, crumpets, pancakes, no potato cakes and no hot-cross buns. And definitely no smegging flapjacks.

[–]LovelyLittleBiscuit 4 points5 points ago

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Ahhh, so you're a waffle man.

[–]Krispykiwi 1 point2 points ago

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pulls out holo-hammer

[–]Razoride 5 points6 points ago

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That may just be the greatest thing I've seen this month.

Anybody know what the hell this is from?

[–]danielxcubed 16 points17 points ago

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Red Dwarf; this is an Atl world version of Arnold rimmer (aka Ace Rimmer)

[–]Pink_cigarette 2 points3 points ago

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I totally forgot about that show!! Thanks. It's all mine now. (well, in a few minutes)

[–]alexgeek 0 points1 point ago

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*alt

[–]danielxcubed 0 points1 point ago

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I think that could have been assumed.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]danielxcubed 0 points1 point ago

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Right, it is an Atlanta world.

[–]chesterdjester 11 points12 points ago

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Ace Rimmer, dimensional super hero.

Smoke me a Kipper I'll be back for breakfast.

edit: later in the same scene he fights off nazi's and saves a princess while riding a dirt bike.

What a guy :D

[–]mitchtbh 5 points6 points ago

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He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer, without him life would be much grimmer, he's handsome, trim, and no-one slimmer, he will never need a zimmer!

[–]zmmar007 2 points3 points ago

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He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer

No rhymes left now apart from quimmer

We hope they fade us out before we get to schlimmer

Fade out you stupid plimmer

[–]halftone84 5 points6 points ago

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My surname is Rimmer, I had these jokes all through school. So much that when having to introduce myself, i would say yes, as in arnold.

[–]Flamelash 3 points4 points ago

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This is ace rimmer, what a legendary figure

[–]zestyo 4 points5 points ago

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What a guy!

[–]Shagnasty 5 points6 points ago

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[–]newborn_mutant 6 points7 points ago

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What a guy!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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To save Princess Bonjela!

[–]RiW-Kirby 2 points3 points ago

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Das is Ace Rimmer!

[–]LemmyLo 2 points3 points ago

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What a guy!

[–]coupdegrace 2 points3 points ago

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I know this gif from this video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqaQAhLJF2k

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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came here to post this. haha old /b/ memories

[–]TMox 2 points3 points ago

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If you start wtf'ing to Red Dwarf, you've got a long haul ahead of you.

[–]Krispykiwi 1 point2 points ago

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What a guy

[–]Mr_Metropolis 1 point2 points ago

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Camen Rider

[–]TheFeshy 1 point2 points ago

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WTF indeed. Everyone knows alligators offer superior aerial handling to crocodiles, due to their wider snout. What was he thinking?

[–]Kryten_2X4B_523P 1 point2 points ago

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He's a SMEEEEEEG HEEEEEEEEEEAD

[–]Kryten2X4B 0 points1 point ago

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Yes, a complete and total SMEEEEEUUUUUUUUUGGGGGHH HEEEEEEEEEEEEE

[–]Perturbed_Spartan 1 point2 points ago

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what the fuck?

more like what the AWESOME

[–]ButterThatBacon 1 point2 points ago

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YEAH Red Dwarf! Great show.

[–]regeya 1 point2 points ago

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Stoke me a clipper.

[–]Slavigula 1 point2 points ago

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Croc surfing, very popular nowadays.

[–]Soup_and_a_Roll 1 point2 points ago

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Zat vas Ace Rimmer. Ve are lucky to be alive!

[–]liverpoop 1 point2 points ago

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it's ok. you're new to red dwarf.

[–]TOR4REE 1 point2 points ago

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I though everyone rode around on magical reptiles.

[–]hybridtheorist 4 points5 points ago

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He's gliding down from a crashing plane, on the back of a crocodile, chasing down a Nazi who jumped out with the only parachute. Obviously.

What a guy.

[–]doeboy73 3 points4 points ago

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It's not magical. He's gliding.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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He's really sliding the tail out on that thing! Which model is it?

[–]sequoia123 0 points1 point ago

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[–]KDIZZLL 0 points1 point ago

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Where have you been?.. everyone's doin it.

[–]LiteweightPhenomenal 0 points1 point ago

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It's cold outside, there'w no kind of atmosphere! I'm all alone, more or less! Let me fly.....

[–]LimehouseJack 0 points1 point ago

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since people have quoted it, but not linked it - here's the excellent Arnold Rimmer song : He's Never Been Mistaken For Yul Brynner!

[–]wadleyst 0 points1 point ago

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Paralligator sailing. Its a lot of fun, but the landings are a bit tricky...

[–]suo 0 points1 point ago

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What a guy!

[–]Chchcharliesheen 0 points1 point ago

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Gerard way flying a alligator...

[–]iccccceman 0 points1 point ago

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[–]vivvav 0 points1 point ago

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I don't know why, but...

[–]InfiniteTypewriters 0 points1 point ago

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That's Ace Rimmer. Even his inter-dimensional space ship's computer is in love with him.

[–]PeterJerome 0 points1 point ago

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Interior crocodile aligator, I drive a Chevrolet movie theatre.

[–]CocaineCowbo 0 points1 point ago

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"No dick, thats a Chinese Meth Dragon..."

[–]Creepwood 0 points1 point ago

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"You actually expect something to go right for me? Arnold schmucko Rimmer? Tosspot by royal appointment?"

[–]medicrow 0 points1 point ago

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Holy shit ur kidding haha. Of all things I thought he would be riding ,

Im going back to bed. I cant start my day like this

[–]Krishaaan 0 points1 point ago

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He's Arnold Arnold Arnold Rimmer.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Without him life would be much grimmer.

[–]PhilbertMcFilibuster 0 points1 point ago

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I think I just saw a concept for Travis Pastrana's next stunt.

[–]Herbanc 0 points1 point ago

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This gif is older than internet and still over 550 upvotes. WTF?!?!?!

[–]Kalima -1 points0 points ago

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Truly has been a few months since i have seen this, and will be a day or so before i see it again now. thanks reddit.

[–]slurpme 0 points1 point ago

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Smoke me a kipper... It's a shame Red Dwarf went downhill long before that...

[–]dcgi 0 points1 point ago

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It's meant to be.

[–]grim53 0 points1 point ago

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I LoL'd

[–]StrawberryPalpatine -1 points0 points ago

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usually when i ride my crocodile in the sky i remember to take off the leash first.

[–]risingyeast -1 points0 points ago

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I don't care