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2011
2012

Shower To Go (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by EffinD

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[–]iwouldntifiwereyou 1961 points1962 points ago

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"Great game guys. 'Scuse me while I rub myself with this block of ice I brought."

[–]JMaboard 1446 points1447 points ago

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"You all don't mind if I get naked in the middle of the basketball court and rub myself with this ice do you?"

-Looks of horror-

"Oh god that's good"

[–]Santos_L_Halper 1017 points1018 points ago

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"Alright guys, I gotta hit the taint. Don't look please?"

[–]JMaboard 701 points702 points ago

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-Still naked-

"Mind if I grab a beer? This rubbing off in the court is making me thirsty"

[–]nexxus-s 837 points838 points ago

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Oh the beer is warm, it's ok we can use the non soapy part of the ice after I rinse my balls.

[–]JMaboard 282 points283 points ago

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"Better yet, my body is somewhat cold we can just run the beer down my body like an ice sculpture"

-poker face'd crowd-

"Who invited Uncle Frank?"

[–]jax9999 155 points156 points ago

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am I the only one that's aroused?

[–]Xaevier 135 points136 points ago

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No, Uncle Frank beat you to it.

[–]ENKC 124 points125 points ago

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Uncle Frank beat it to you.

[–]Balthasar90 53 points54 points ago

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I think Uncle Frank will beat it for you.

[–]januszeal 11 points12 points ago

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Uncle Frank beat off on you.

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        [–]dsmalls13 215 points216 points ago

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        These pretzels... are makin' me thirsty!

        [–]FRF4F 106 points107 points ago

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        -Sipping beer while still naked-

        "Oh wtf, dude you have a boner!"

        "Oh come on guys, it's just a semi..."

        [–]guizzy 118 points119 points ago

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        "Come on, stop staring at it. Awww, ok, now it's a full..."

        [–]alsorobots 84 points85 points ago

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        Dont pretend you're not impressed!

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                [–]Rawruu 320 points321 points ago

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                "But it's okay. I brought enough ice for all of us to rub ourselves. Also, we're not guys."

                [–]dbonham 447 points448 points ago

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                mmmmmm, not guys

                [–]scientifique 429 points430 points ago

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                Redditors seem to have very low standards these days.

                [–]Jafit 257 points258 points ago

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                standards

                What?

                [–]KnowsYourFemale 51 points52 points ago

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                confirmmed

                [–]captainAwesomePants 70 points71 points ago

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                I really wish you were KnowsYoureFemale

                [–]GentleZacharias 80 points81 points ago

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                Well, he specifically knows YOURS. The suggestion is that he did your wife.

                [–]Physics101 58 points59 points ago

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                thatsthejoke.jpg

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                        [–]jdk 56 points57 points ago

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                        And before that, 'Dude, mind if I I leave this block of ice in the cooler with the beer? I put my name on the lid so nobody would be licking it.'

                        [–]responds_to_username 10 points11 points ago

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                        If you were me, I'd be you. And if I were you, I definitely would.

                        [–]Windforce 21 points22 points ago

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                        Can I have it after you're done?

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                          [–]renthor 272 points273 points ago

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                          How did you take the picture for step 6?

                          [–]cromstrong 253 points254 points ago

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                          Not this shit again...

                          [–]flaminglips 278 points279 points ago

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                          Context

                          Probably my favorite thread of comments.

                          [–]gilligvroom 66 points67 points ago

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                          Christ. That was already a year ago?

                          [–]rotzooi 64 points65 points ago

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                          Dude, I was just going to read Reddit for a while... and...a YEAR happened?!

                          fuck

                          [–]shillbert 6 points7 points ago

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                          You are not a clever man.

                          [–]Jiuholar 5 points6 points ago

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                          TIL That I've been reading reddit for a year, only started posting after lurking for ~3 months. One of the first things I saw on reddit.

                          [–]johnny_moronic 27 points28 points ago

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                          I missed that one. Thanks.

                          [–]Genericpenisjoke 3 points4 points ago

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                          Holy shit, I laughed so hard that I cried. No exaggeration. I cried and I sounded like a widow mourning the death of her WW2-attending husband.

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                            [–]HelmzDeep[!] 59 points60 points ago

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                            That Trader Joes Apricot & Mango Greek yogurt is the shit.

                            [–]Ricter 11 points12 points ago

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                            Yes, yes it is.

                            [–][deleted] 27 points28 points ago

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                            Fuck yeah - came here to say this. Glad to know a fellow TJ's yogurt consumer is out here. But I'd have to say the honey version of that same yogurt is supeeriah to the ap/mang. (When you get high and munchie'd, spread that cold/thick honey yogurt over something like oven-warm banana/walnut bread. It's like elven cake.)

                            [–]Pufflekun 18 points19 points ago

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                            spread that cold/thick honey yogurt over something like oven-warm banana/walnut bread

                            I came.

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                                [–]ass_herpes 882 points883 points ago

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                                upvote for creativity. downvote for making me feel uncomfortable thinking about the cold soapy/ sweaty mess that this would make. i don't care about my arms. it's the downstairs that needs the attention. just shove the soapy ice cube up your ass and as it melts it will cool you down and soap you up. i wasn't here.

                                [–]matty_c 205 points206 points ago

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                                but then you still got that ass herpes thing to deal with. but at least you won't be sweaty i guess.

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                                  [–][deleted] 993 points994 points ago

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                                  why not just use wet wipes/baby wipes?

                                  some even rebranded the generic ones and charges more for less! http://www.trisports.com/nathan-s-power-shower-wipes.html

                                  [–]HTP5 1184 points1185 points ago

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                                  But then people wouldn't see me rubbing frozen dip on myself, idiot.

                                  [–][deleted] ago

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                                  [deleted]

                                  [–]frickindeal 106 points107 points ago

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                                  It's so simple though: you just shower it all off.

                                  Wait...

                                  [–]KatieLynnie 92 points93 points ago

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                                  As soon as I read idiot I instantly changed the way I read it to Dwight Schrute's voice. I then promptly reread the sentence in his voice and it made it much better.

                                  [–][deleted] ago

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                                  [deleted]

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                                      [–]PMan1 71 points72 points ago

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                                      At least the wet wipes are actually "to go"

                                      Unless you live in polar bear country a block of ice is not going to make it too far from the fridge.

                                      [–]DaveLeGato 43 points44 points ago

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                                      and in a polar bear country you surely wouldn't sweat a lot

                                      [–]orangefly 67 points68 points ago

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                                      you ever been chased by a polar bear....???....

                                      [–][deleted] 63 points64 points ago

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                                      Yes.

                                      [–][deleted] 22 points23 points ago

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                                      i have, and its fucking exhilarating.

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                                          [–]AnalogDan 165 points166 points ago

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                                          You can't get karma for suggesting people use baby wipes, idiot.

                                          [–]NyQuil012 49 points50 points ago

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                                          Challenge accepted!

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                                            [–]nympheas 83 points84 points ago

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                                            This comment made me laugh. Such a simple solution.

                                            (No offence OP.)

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                                              [–]Xanthan81 60 points61 points ago

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                                              "Why is Jerry trembling like he's cold?"

                                              "Yeah, it's like 90 outside and we just worked out..."

                                              "He must be on drugs!"

                                              "Smells good though."

                                              [–]BalboaBaggins 260 points261 points ago

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                                              But... you have to hold the soapy side with your hands while you "rinse"...

                                              [–]BosonTheClown 293 points294 points ago

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                                              Then, you can just use the water side to rinse your hands...

                                              Oh wait.

                                              [–]sunmonkey 73 points74 points ago

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                                              Have 2 separate cubes. 1 for pure ice, and another for soapy ice.

                                              [–][deleted] 137 points138 points ago

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                                              Why not just a block of ice and a bar of soap?

                                              [–]gonzal61 116 points117 points ago

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                                              why not soap and water?

                                              [–][deleted] 141 points142 points ago

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                                              Let's not get crazy

                                              [–]goodolarchie 57 points58 points ago

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                                              No, no, this could work!

                                              The soap would be available in a convenient ad-hoc bar fashion, whereas the water would just be available constantly. This would serve the purpose of pre-wetting the skin area and washing off the soap once it has been applied. It could come down in a fountain and use gravity to ensure fresh water is constantly supplied.

                                              [–]FoxHound_ 19 points20 points ago

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                                              This is disgusting. I bet only nerds do this.

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                                                [–]sunmonkey 124 points125 points ago

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                                                Then it wouldn't be ice!

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                                                      [–][deleted] ago

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                                                      [deleted]

                                                      [–]ethraax 43 points44 points ago

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                                                      I'm not sure if you're joking or not, but this would be easy. Just make the soapy part in a smaller container, transfer it to a big container, and add water all around.

                                                      Of course, this doesn't solve the fact that the original idea is horribly impractical.

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                                                        [–]iHateusernames1 57 points58 points ago

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                                                        I'm so glad I'm not the only one who thought this idea was fucking stupid.

                                                        They make a lot of actual "shower to go" products and various types of wipes, I don't know why you just wouldn't use those.

                                                        Or, if you're at your friends house (as evident by the fact there's a fridge) why wouldn't you just use his/her shower?

                                                        [–]waterisgreat 77 points78 points ago

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                                                        because you have a shower to go bar!!! duh.

                                                        [–]onionjuicer 41 points42 points ago

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                                                        Shower to go made me think of a plastic bag filled with water with a few holes poked it in.

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                                                            [–][deleted] ago

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                                                            [deleted]

                                                            [–]tinkercreek 771 points772 points ago

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                                                            Or you know you could just take a fucking shower

                                                            [–]Sing_The_Comment 828 points829 points ago

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                                                            http://snd.sc/qcGscC

                                                            [–]othersomethings 176 points177 points ago

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                                                            Based on the actual content and your guitar style, I feel that if we strung together all your sung comments, it would make a Dashboard Confessionals song.

                                                            [–][deleted] ago

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                                                            [deleted]

                                                            [–]tinkercreek 313 points314 points ago

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                                                            Attention: I have been recognized by a novelty account

                                                            [–]_Shit_Just_Got_Real_ 209 points210 points ago

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                                                            AMA?

                                                            [–]Qingy 47 points48 points ago

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                                                            He should do an AMA in /r/circlejerk.

                                                            [–]polaroid 63 points64 points ago

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                                                            Isn't that where we are?

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                                                              [–]Sebguer 32 points33 points ago

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                                                              He replied to one of my comments yesterday and got five times as much karma as the comment he sang. Woe is me.

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                                                                [–]TrustMeIMAPolitician 94 points95 points ago

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                                                                A++ would listen again.

                                                                [–]MrStonedOne 56 points57 points ago

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                                                                Don't you mean AA+

                                                                [–]behaaki 38 points39 points ago

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                                                                yeah I don't trust you

                                                                [–]TrustMeIMAPolitician 46 points47 points ago

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                                                                Well, behaaki, I know, and actually hope, you won't. I understand why. Nearly all politicians can't be trusted at all, they simply care for themselves and their friends and use the system for their own ends. That's actually exactly the reason why I went into politics, because I found the field too filled with disgustingly selfish people - but it is too important to be left to them. So, well, when you vote, I guess there won't be many you trust. But I hope that then you at least vote for the guy you not-trust the least so that the guys that you don't trust at all don't get power instead. Thanks!

                                                                [–]hatboysam 24 points25 points ago

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                                                                This guy's good.

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                                                                    [–]MaidenLane 14 points15 points ago

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                                                                    (immediately listens to all your posts)

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                                                                        [–]war_whale 123 points124 points ago

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                                                                        Huh. And here I am thinking that washcloths (or if you're feeling consumer-y, baby wipes) were the peak of portable washing.

                                                                        Wait, nope, I thought that because it's true.

                                                                        [–][deleted] 2113 points2114 points ago

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                                                                        STEP SEVEN: Enjoy being the weirdo that is rubbing him/herself with ice in the corner of the room while your friends watch in horror and ask themselves why they even invited you.

                                                                        [–]Larry_the_Unix_Guy 1595 points1596 points ago

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                                                                        HEY GUYS! I made all of us some ice soap! Come lather up!

                                                                        [–]xoe6eixi 674 points675 points ago

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                                                                        Gayer than rainbow-striped chaps.

                                                                        [–]AnalogDan 427 points428 points ago

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                                                                        Mix in some food coloring for maximum gayness.

                                                                        [–]LuvKrahft 420 points421 points ago

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                                                                        Clown wig is my favorite flavor.

                                                                        [–]soggy_cereal 141 points142 points ago

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                                                                        *Sweaty clown wig

                                                                        [–]Sarah_Connor 26 points27 points ago

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                                                                        DEAR GOD THE MEMORIES

                                                                        [–]throw_away_me 30 points31 points ago

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                                                                        Yum I can taste the clown inside!

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                                                                          [–]khalse 42 points43 points ago

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                                                                          This is the post where i collapse the rest of the comments because the comment it responds to and the comments following it are not worth reading.

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                                                                                [–]PKSTEAD 61 points62 points ago

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                                                                                NOT GAY!

                                                                                [–]I_Can_MSPaint_That 39 points40 points ago

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                                                                                http://imgur.com/5WGUS.jpg

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                                                                                  [–]Swissgiant 280 points281 points ago

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                                                                                  OH GOD HES RUBBING HIMSELF WITH ICE AGAIN!!!!!

                                                                                  WHY GOD WHYYYYYY!!!!!!!!

                                                                                  [–]AnalogDan 298 points299 points ago

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                                                                                  HIS NIPPLES ARE LIKE NEEDLES

                                                                                  [–]Deadible 128 points129 points ago

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                                                                                  AND IT ONLY TOOK 7 SECONDS

                                                                                  [–]Ketafiend 8 points9 points ago

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                                                                                  WHY ARE WE YELLING?

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                                                                                      [–]kaptainkaos 309 points310 points ago

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                                                                                      STEP EIGHT: Mumble the following over and over "It puts the ice block on its skin, it does as it is told..."

                                                                                      [–][deleted] 49 points50 points ago

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                                                                                      "BITCH YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT CLEAN IS!!!"

                                                                                      [–]jdizzle1492 23 points24 points ago

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                                                                                      Now it puts the soap in the cooler, or it gets the sprinkler again...

                                                                                      [–]spastacus 107 points108 points ago

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                                                                                      Corner of the room? What kind of ice rubbin man would be in the corner?

                                                                                      If you are manly enough to rub down with a block of ice in company then you are manly enough to give everyone a goose bump and shiver show that they won't soon forget.

                                                                                      [–]timelighter 52 points53 points ago

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                                                                                      Rub the ice on yourself in an elevator for extra Reddit bonus today.

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                                                                                        [–]Ag-E 115 points116 points ago

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                                                                                        I think this officially makes you 'that guy'.

                                                                                        [–]ProbablyHittingOnYou 1033 points1034 points ago

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                                                                                        I don't really think the rinse part of this would work. The shower water is supposed to wash the lather off of you... but here, wouldn't it simply stick to the ice?

                                                                                        You'd really just be smearing your filth all over yourself.

                                                                                        [–]lampshade14 854 points855 points ago

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                                                                                        and your hands would be numb

                                                                                        [–]QuietFlight 1113 points1114 points ago

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                                                                                        And you'd look like a moron rubbing a block of soapy ice all over yourself.

                                                                                        [–]jonathanrdt 444 points445 points ago

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                                                                                        "Hey could one of you guys get my back?"

                                                                                        "Guys...?"

                                                                                        [–]stenzor 112 points113 points ago

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                                                                                        Don't drop the soap ice

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                                                                                          [–]ProbablyHittingOnYou 140 points141 points ago

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                                                                                          That part kind of goes without saying

                                                                                          [–]pradador 29 points30 points ago

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                                                                                          But it's better if you do say it.

                                                                                          [–]GoldwaterAndTea 20 points21 points ago

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                                                                                          And, in all likelihood the ice will have melted by the time you actually need to use it.

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                                                                                              [–]CookieDoughCooter 100 points101 points ago

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                                                                                              aaaand the op is nowhere to be found.

                                                                                              [–]HumaneFlesh 43 points44 points ago

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                                                                                              Well, I guess you wipe it off with some kind of towel afterwards.

                                                                                              [–]beder 102 points103 points ago

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                                                                                              Always bring your towel.

                                                                                              [–]El_Camino_SS 22 points23 points ago

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                                                                                              You sass that hoopy Ford Prefect? NOW that's a frood who knows where his towel is.

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                                                                                                [–]Horny_Troll 20 points21 points ago

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                                                                                                I guess you wipe it off with some kind of towel afterwards

                                                                                                baby wipe?

                                                                                                [–]fripletister 119 points120 points ago

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                                                                                                Baby wipes are probably a better all-in-one solution for this as a whole, really.

                                                                                                [–]gonzolahst 25 points26 points ago

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                                                                                                I only use the ones made out of FRESH babies. Accept no substitutes.

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                                                                                                  [–]Scadilla 67 points68 points ago

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                                                                                                  A frozen baby wipe.

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                                                                                                      [–][deleted] 250 points251 points ago

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                                                                                                      Not sure if awesome, or if really stupid

                                                                                                      [–]jfjjfjff 128 points129 points ago

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                                                                                                      its really stupid. just bring a wet terricloth towel.

                                                                                                      [–]evitagen-armak 16 points17 points ago

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                                                                                                      Or a water bottle and a terricloth towel.

                                                                                                      [–]Nyax-A 35 points36 points ago

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                                                                                                      It's clever, but impractical.

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                                                                                                        [–][deleted] 103 points104 points ago

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                                                                                                        STIR THAT BITCH UP! PUT IT IN WITH THE BEER OR SOME SHIT. AARG SO MANLY

                                                                                                        [–]moonman 37 points38 points ago

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                                                                                                        I stur mine up with the Binford 4300 Heavy Duty Hammer Drill, HO HO HO!

                                                                                                        [–]NotThatDoug 16 points17 points ago

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                                                                                                        THEN RUB YOURSELF DOWN INFRONT OF ALL YOUR GUY FRIENDS... slightly less manly

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                                                                                                          [–]GreatWhiteFail 1213 points1214 points ago

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                                                                                                          Pro-Tipp: Skip the sport, start drinking beer immediately.

                                                                                                          [–]ProbablyHittingOnYou 383 points384 points ago

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                                                                                                          Drinking is better when you've earned it

                                                                                                          [–]Drainout 716 points717 points ago

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                                                                                                          Ok, make your goal to walk to the fridge for beer. Good job, you just earned a beer.

                                                                                                          [–]regisfrost 338 points339 points ago

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                                                                                                          If you still feel guilty drop down and do a push-up. But just one, you're not trying to kill yourself.

                                                                                                          [–]straylight85 118 points119 points ago

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                                                                                                          If you mean pushing the ring pull of the beer up, yes that sounds about right.

                                                                                                          [–]calmlunatic 52 points53 points ago

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                                                                                                          Then do this after drinking said beer.

                                                                                                          [–]headasplodes 5 points6 points ago

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                                                                                                          The incredibly smug look on homers face kills me every time.

                                                                                                          [–]gabeag 14 points15 points ago

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                                                                                                          I think that would be called a pull-up. Don't get me wrong though, still sounds exhausting, you better sit down for that.

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                                                                                                              [–]k1down 17 points18 points ago

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                                                                                                              Went and took a wiz? You win a beer!

                                                                                                              [–]dino340 40 points41 points ago

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                                                                                                              Finished a beer? You deserve another one!

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                                                                                                                [–]Hellshock 14 points15 points ago

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                                                                                                                Dude, I got out of bed today before 3pm. I fucking earned it.

                                                                                                                [–]Velitatio 11 points12 points ago

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                                                                                                                If i get up in the morning i feel i have earned it

                                                                                                                [–]sxcamaro 13 points14 points ago

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                                                                                                                How did you find out about your Mom's bj policy?!

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                                                                                                                    [–]prboi 14 points15 points ago

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                                                                                                                    Great idea, but why look like an idiot trying to clean yourself when you can enjoy your time with your friends & then shower later like normal people do?

                                                                                                                    [–]wallawalla22 40 points41 points ago

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                                                                                                                    Pro-tip: Eat the soap, bathe in beer.

                                                                                                                    [–]bfodder 549 points550 points ago

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                                                                                                                    This is incredibly stupid.

                                                                                                                    [–][deleted] 155 points156 points ago

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                                                                                                                    Creative, though. But still incredibly stupid.

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                                                                                                                      [–]SimKat 79 points80 points ago

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                                                                                                                      I have eczema and reading this made me cringe. Leaving soap on my skin causes it to get really inflamed, and I have a feeling that the block of ice wouldn't cut it for completely rinsing the soap off. It makes me itch just looking at it D:

                                                                                                                      [–]Brad3000 24 points25 points ago*

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                                                                                                                      I have eczema as well. It didn't develop until my thirties and then out of nowhere I got these red patches on my hands. Eventually it crept all over my hands, drying and cracking my skin. It looked like I had fucking zombie hands. I thought I had picked up a fungus until I went to a dermatologist. Now I use Albolene and it makes my eczema almost non-existent. It actually works better than the topical steroids the doctor prescribed.

                                                                                                                      Edited for spelling - albolene

                                                                                                                      [–]GoldenBoar 85 points86 points ago

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                                                                                                                      Now I use Alboline and it makes my eczema almost non-existent. It actually works better than the topical steroids the doctor prescribed.

                                                                                                                      How did you get past my ad blocker?

                                                                                                                      [–]CorporateShill 18 points19 points ago

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                                                                                                                      Albolene® Moisturizing Cleanser is a makeup remover that easily cleanses stubborn mascara and lipstick, yet leaves skin feeling soft, supple and moisturized. Albolene is an effective and gentle makeup remover that is clinically proven by the Skin Study Center to moisturize better than the leading brands in its category, keeping your complexion clean, soft and supple...for younger looking skin.

                                                                                                                      [–]Brad3000 40 points41 points ago

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                                                                                                                      Amusing comment but I'm really not trying to spam. I just had really freaky bad eczema and something helped clear it up. Thought I'd mention it to another person that has eczema.

                                                                                                                      [–]almamater 10 points11 points ago

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                                                                                                                      And we appreciate that. Is it prescription or OTC?

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                                                                                                                          [–][deleted] 9 points10 points ago

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                                                                                                                          This was my 4th grade science project invention, should've gotten a patent on it...........FUCK

                                                                                                                          [–]DeadLocked7 12 points13 points ago

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                                                                                                                          Until you get to your penis. It's like pouring salt on a slug.

                                                                                                                          [–]thenameonthebox 186 points187 points ago

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                                                                                                                          You know that feeling when you select Comic Sans? Fuck that shit.

                                                                                                                          [–]freyyr 65 points66 points ago

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                                                                                                                          COMIC SAAAAAAAAAANS!

                                                                                                                          [–]nchammer326 33 points34 points ago

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                                                                                                                          Good, but I've always preferred Achewood's take.

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                                                                                                                            [–]DrTom 18 points19 points ago

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                                                                                                                            I'm Comic Sans, asshole!

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                                                                                                                              [–]IronicAlbatross 32 points33 points ago

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                                                                                                                              Reeeeeal men of geeeeenious

                                                                                                                              [–]Sarcasm_Llama 10 points11 points ago

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                                                                                                                              Baby wipes. You fail.

                                                                                                                              [–]rainbow_bubblegum 21 points22 points ago

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                                                                                                                              I tried this at home yesterday. Definitely the worst ice cream I had in years!

                                                                                                                              [–][deleted] 40 points41 points ago

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                                                                                                                              This may be the most retarded thing ever to have so many upvotes.

                                                                                                                              [–][deleted] 40 points41 points ago

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                                                                                                                              I can not believe this has almost 2000 upvotes.

                                                                                                                              [–]99_Probrems 59 points60 points ago

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                                                                                                                              I think this is being upvoted more for the sheer ridiculousness of the idea and awesome mockery going on in the comments.

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                                                                                                                                [–]dakauf 19 points20 points ago

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                                                                                                                                My favorite parts are when he mentions drinking beer and eating meat in attempt to make ice soap manly

                                                                                                                                [–]ordinaryrendition 38 points39 points ago

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                                                                                                                                I read this, for some reason, as "Enjoy your refreshing, ice-cold abortion while your friends fester in their own sweat."

                                                                                                                                [–]philby-p 84 points85 points ago

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                                                                                                                                This is a horrible, useless idea.

                                                                                                                                [–][deleted] 45 points46 points ago

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                                                                                                                                This is the dumbest thing I've ever seen on the front page. My shower to go involves carrying your shower gel, a washcloth, shampoo and a bucket of water with you at all times. Should be about as practical.

                                                                                                                                [–]diulei 7 points8 points ago

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                                                                                                                                Creative, but I'll just stick to using baby wipes. Plus with this, you run the risk of having some of it melt if you're sporting for too long, then you'll have an ooey-gooey-soapy mess.

                                                                                                                                [–]eerbin13 119 points120 points ago

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                                                                                                                                Wonderful idea, masterful execution...

                                                                                                                                [–]princetab 4 points5 points ago

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                                                                                                                                Reddit doesn't go outside, silly!

                                                                                                                                [–]ToooBlue 6 points7 points ago

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                                                                                                                                You have become a legend. Congratulations

                                                                                                                                [–]PinkMonkeySlippers 5 points6 points ago

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                                                                                                                                But if you don't also bring a change of clothes, you're still a sweaty stinky mess.

                                                                                                                                [–]Daveeyboy 6 points7 points ago

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                                                                                                                                Cue music: "REAAL MENN OF GEEENIUUS..."

                                                                                                                                [–]mellowmonk 6 points7 points ago

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                                                                                                                                Or just shower when you get home.

                                                                                                                                [–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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                                                                                                                                If you do not feel awesome afterwards, drink another beer. Repeat until awesomeness is achieved.

                                                                                                                                [–]jkups 28 points29 points ago

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                                                                                                                                Gosh... don't you need to rinse?

                                                                                                                                Good idea really, but I would think you would stay soapy, which would bother me.

                                                                                                                                [–]ohnojulie 26 points27 points ago

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                                                                                                                                I would have a gallon of water nearby. I would hate being sticky.

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                                                                                                                                  [–][deleted] 25 points26 points ago

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                                                                                                                                  To all those downvoting, be honest, was it because of the Comic Sans?

                                                                                                                                  [–]Elerion_ 10 points11 points ago

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                                                                                                                                  Alternative solution: Soap. Bottle of water. Cloth.

                                                                                                                                  [–]Marshmon 12 points13 points ago

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                                                                                                                                  I'm surprised that everyone has failed to mention that this would probably be cold as fuck and you would find great difficulty in placing ice on your chest back and balls.

                                                                                                                                  [–]anidal 10 points11 points ago

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                                                                                                                                  What about the peenor shrinkage?

                                                                                                                                  [–]capecodcarl 30 points31 points ago

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                                                                                                                                  Couldn't you just have one of your friends massage your balls and suck you off while you're washing yourself if you're that concerned about it?

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                                                                                                                                    [–]WcJessen 16 points17 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    I don't know how close I want this to get to my balls. Great idea, though.

                                                                                                                                    [–][deleted] 56 points57 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    Don't worry, they'll retreat safely into your body cavity.

                                                                                                                                    [–]elmarko44 7 points8 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    I don't care what anyone else says... I think this is brilliant.

                                                                                                                                    [–]FlakeDrake 4 points5 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    Step one through four: Buy this. Step five and six: dampen a rag and wipe off. ...

                                                                                                                                    [–]darlantan 3 points4 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    Having bathed with snow before, I can say that this does not really leave me feeling any cleaner than just being sweaty does.

                                                                                                                                    [–]headzoo 2 points3 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    Could have just used baby wipes.

                                                                                                                                    [–]ChubakasBush 5 points6 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    What about fucking wipes?

                                                                                                                                    [–]dave28 3 points4 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    Alternatively: play sports in a location that has showers.

                                                                                                                                    [–]QuasarCustard 5 points6 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    I read all of that in Billy May's voice.

                                                                                                                                    [–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    a complicated and impractical solution to a simple problem. are you a computer programmer?

                                                                                                                                    [–]Abisoccer1 3 points4 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    This is brilliant.

                                                                                                                                    [–]thelocalnative 3 points4 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    And that's when your friends say they're going to shower and meet up after...

                                                                                                                                    [–]ickis1313 5 points6 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    comic sans? really?

                                                                                                                                    [–]HollaJames 3 points4 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    alright, I know there are a million reasons why no one would ever do this but what bothers me the most is, you can't rinse with a thin layer of ice! instead of sweat you'd have body-wash stuck to you. At least I could explain why I'd been sweating. I can't explain why I washed myself with a block of home-made-ice-soap with out looking like fucking, Ted Kaczynski.

                                                                                                                                    [–]staticmm 2 points3 points ago

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                                                                                                                                    Wow the Internet is now complete

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