DAMMIT. You're right... I have a net balance of zero points. FUCK. Hrm.. that's hard for me to answer, actually. My own experience started as practical experience, learning from friends (and their parents) as we worked on their dirtbikes, 4 wheelers, and/or go karts, but I wouldn't say my education actually began until I was about 16 and bought my first car. I learned pretty much through hands on instruction with a good friend who knew everything. He and I and a few others rebuilt the engine on his '78 Corvette while we were in high school, and that's where my basic understanding of a car engine came from.

I can tell you that for me, everything is easier to learn if I can touch it, and have someone show me how it's done right. My recommendation is if you have your own vehicle, you purchase a Clymer's or Chilton's manual for it, and start performing your own minor maintenance (You'd be amazed at how much money you can save in a year just by doing your own oil and brake pad changes).

I wish I could point you to a really cool site with an engine primer or something, but pretty much everything I know about engines I've learned from watching people with more experience, being told by my elders, or screwing something up and then having to learn the correct way to do it.

The most basic rule of engines I can share, though. At the most simplified level, an internal combustion engine only needs 3 things to operate: Fuel, combustion (spark), and air. If an engine won't run, it's because one of these 3 things is not present. (That's simplifying, of course... An engine also won't run if you remove the oil from it, or let it rust all to hell, etc).