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top 200 commentsshow all 465

[–]notgf3 386 points387 points ago*

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I painted this! Surprised to see it pop up on my front page.

I have a new website up at notgf3.com

/shameless plug

[–]Woolio 31 points32 points ago

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So... Why has he lost his legs, again?

[–]notgf3 139 points140 points ago

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Ha. My original idea was diabetes, because it would be such an anti-climatic end to his career.

[–]sidewalkchalked 42 points43 points ago

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hahahaha. Jesus. I know that we aren't supposed to post just to say "that is funny," but man, that is fucking genius.

[–]cynoclast 12 points13 points ago

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I guess the invincibility star there doesn't work against diabetes.

[–]PeteyWheatstraw 5 points6 points ago

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I figured they were bitten off by a piranha plant. All Mario's boundless heroism ending in a split instant, violent and gory and utterly meaningless. And the conflict with Bowser just goes on without him. Koopa doesn't even pay attention to him anymore...Mario is just a broken man.

[–]wellgolly 5 points6 points ago

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He's probably an embarrassing footnote in the Mushroom Kingdom's past now that it has begun using diplomacy to solve its problems.

Peach has cut all ties with the monarch murdering vigilante to avoid destroying her political career.

[–]dclowd9901 1 point2 points ago

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Wow, that's beautiful

[–]Omnipotent0 10 points11 points ago

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The great Mushroom War of star year 42. Lost a lot of good toads back there...

[–]redsuit 4 points5 points ago

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YOU DON'T KNOW MAN YOU WEREN'T THERE!

[–]strongsauce 1 point2 points ago

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I just assumed it happened because he didn't jump high enough over a piranha plant

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points ago

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WOW. I just checked out your website. I LOVE ALL THE THINGS. Especially the Adventure Time set.

[–]djeik 6 points7 points ago

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It's the top of all time over in r/alternativeart.

[–]notgf3 3 points4 points ago

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Oh cool. I never knew that existed

[–]smallfried 5 points6 points ago

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[–]JimmyBisMe 1 point2 points ago

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Nightmare fuel.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Really good stuff. Good thing I wasn't planning on sleeping tonight anyway...

[–]Imreallythatguy 1 point2 points ago

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Upvote this gentleman and get him his credit!

[–]HemHaw 1 point2 points ago

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I really love this piece. I think it's beautiful in a lot of ways, even if some may dismiss it as parody or just a joke.

Also, I really wanted "The Boy Who Learns Of Fear" to be Commander Keen.

[–]a_stupid_white_kid 1 point2 points ago

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This one has the darkness in him...

[–]TnTBass 1 point2 points ago

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So... how does one buy prints of these to hang on your wall? The Mario one is fantastic. Do you have higher res pics as well (1920x1200)?

[–]JoinRedditTheySaid 1 point2 points ago

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Honestly all your other pictures are even better than the Mario one.

[–]NonPermissive 268 points269 points ago

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Could still ride a Yoshi if we made him a special saddle.

[–]aperson 311 points312 points ago

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Yoshi is probably buried out back. :(

[–]DrDicknips 250 points251 points ago

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Yoshi actually refers to an entire species so unless there was some sort of genocide... oh god.

[–]RestoreFear 111 points112 points ago

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Once Mario lost his legs, Bowser became more powerful than ever. The Yoshi never had a chance.

[–]TheJBW 116 points117 points ago

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TIL that the plural of Yoshi is Yoshi, and that Mario did the equivalent of naming his dog "dog"

[–]rdeluca 43 points44 points ago

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He didn't name it. They named themselves. They can speak y'know. Well... Sometimes.

[–]Twevy 48 points49 points ago

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I don't think they can say anything but Yoshi. Sort of like Hodor. I sense a trend.

[–]TheJBW 68 points69 points ago

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"Anyang." - Anyang

[–]jaybof 13 points14 points ago

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Annyong

[–]SnakeEart 7 points8 points ago

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Hello.

[–]MisterMeat 1 point2 points ago

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안넹!

[–]shellieC 1 point2 points ago

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"Steve Holt!"

-- Steve Holt

[–]rdeluca 12 points13 points ago

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Depends on the game. They actually wrote Mario a note in Super Mario World... Was Yoshi's cookie their first appearance before that? I think so...

But in Super Mario RPG 7 Stars there were a couple of Yoshi's that could talk (in fact, most could). Like that blue asshole with the sunglasses....

[–]Kirdayne 9 points10 points ago

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Boshi? That guy was an asshole.

[–]rdeluca 2 points3 points ago

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YES! BOSHI! Blue jackass.

[–]MaxX_Evolution 5 points6 points ago

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Also.. Super Mario 64, anyone?

[–]goodbyegalaxy 3 points4 points ago

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In Mario RPG the normal green Yoshi was the only one that communicate with Mario. You could only understand what the other ones were saying if you were riding him.

[–]rasolne 1 point2 points ago

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[–]Centreri 1 point2 points ago

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Pika pikachu!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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"HODOR!" - Hodor

[–]cole1114 12 points13 points ago

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B-b-but Luigi is right there behind him...

[–]RestoreFear 29 points30 points ago

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Luigi developed Alzheimer's. He doesn't even remember who Bowser is.

[–]cole1114 17 points18 points ago

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I'm saying that if Mario lost his legs early enough, Luigi would have been more than capable of saving the kingdom. He was always better anyway.

[–]TodTheTyrant 20 points21 points ago

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you must be a little brother, me too.

[–]stufff 5 points6 points ago

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I am an older brother but would start 2 player games even by myself, die once as mario to that first goomba, and then play luigi, because he was green and therefore better.

Also he is more awesome at jumping.

[–]flying_postman 1 point2 points ago

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You wouldn't feel the same way after playing Luigi's Mansion.

[–]cole1114 2 points3 points ago

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Luigi kicked butt in that game and you know it.

[–]w2tpmf 1 point2 points ago

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Or Mario is Missing.

[–]dabork 1 point2 points ago

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Higher jump does come in handy a lot.

[–]sidewalkchalked 1 point2 points ago

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I upvoting and upvoting but getting more and more shocked at you people. HOW CAN I LAUGH?

[–]aperson 6 points7 points ago

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Yes, yoshi is both his name and species :)

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

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The eggs...fields and fields of crushed eggs.

OH GOD, SOMEBODY FUCKING HOLD ME! Somebody please thank Mr. Goomba for putting as many as he could on his list.

[–]RexBearcock 1 point2 points ago

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At least you didn't go Sophie's Choice and make Mario choose between Luigi and the princess...

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Maybe he chose both, and the price was his legs...

[–]Pufflekun 1 point2 points ago

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Yoshi actually refers to an entire species

The fact that you have to explain this means there are people on /r/gaming who haven't played Yoshi's Island. For shame.

[–]tanplusblue 26 points27 points ago

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That's okay, I wasn't planning on feeling happy today anyway.

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points ago

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No, he sacrificed his best friend to make that one jump.

That damn jump.

[–]SenorZorro2000 23 points24 points ago

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This jump?

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

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Yes.

That jump.

Hold on, there's some sawdust in my eye.

[–]lilmonkey99 1 point2 points ago

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This comment is especially depressing since my dog's name is Yoshi :'(

[–]JohntheShrubber 20 points21 points ago

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King bowser has a soft place in his heart for cripples, bastards, and broken things.

[–]illgresi 6 points7 points ago

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No, you're thinking of King Bowser's brother.

[–]SirDigbyChknCaesar 57 points58 points ago

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Hodor?

[–][deleted] 20 points21 points ago

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Hodor Hodor Hodor.

[–]TSC 168 points169 points ago

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Why doesn't he have legs, though?

[–]emceelokey 85 points86 points ago

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I figure diabetes.

[–]lymn 27 points28 points ago

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Must have been all the cake Peach made for him

[–]yodamann 57 points58 points ago

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Diabeetus

FTFY

[–]neildiamond12 9 points10 points ago

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Wilford Brimley Disease FTFY

[–]snatcher04 11 points12 points ago

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Twas the diabetes that broke the sole of our hero.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

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He couldn't be heeled.

[–]chaske 7 points8 points ago

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Tis an impossible feet.

[–]TalonFORCE 387 points388 points ago

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It turns out to a rare genetic trait found in 1 of 4 goombas meant that they were slightly radioactive. This coupled with the fact that Mario always seemed to be jumping/falling tremendous heights and constant shrinage and growth from a 'shroom addiction may have contributed to him eventually needing surgery on his legs multiple times before they got so deformed and dishevelled that the doctors thought it would be kinder to just amputate. I say doctors, but it was just Mario in a lab coat with a slight bout of schizophrenia.

[–]LegoLegume 133 points134 points ago

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I don't think a genetic trait found in 25% of the population is that rare...

[–]scratchfury 54 points55 points ago

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You obviously don't work for a drug company.

[–]qwnp 28 points29 points ago

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Do you suffer from thinking? Ask your Doctor about Loboto™

[–]Neato 10 points11 points ago

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That'd be a good ad for heroine.

[–]brenanj 3 points4 points ago

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you mean heroin.

[–]xsilium 5 points6 points ago

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Thank you very much, Dr. Loboto. You helped me out just when I needed you!

[–]brenanj 6 points7 points ago

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Domo Arigato!

[–]mod_critical 2 points3 points ago

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Just say: Loboto™ ME PLEASE!

[–]BrotherSeamus 1 point2 points ago

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Thinking doesn't afflict anywhere near one quarter of the population.

[–]FKRMunkiBoi 24 points25 points ago

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DIABEETUS took his legs.

Look at his pot-belly - too much pasta = diabeetus.

[–]Red_means_go 6 points7 points ago

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Wilford?

[–]Have-a-Muffin 4 points5 points ago

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... rare genetic trait found in 1 of 4...

What?

[–]down_vote_magnet 11 points12 points ago

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I've got to hand it to you, this is the best comment I read all day.

[–]LonelyNixon 1 point2 points ago

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Mario is a terrible doctor. His treatments consist of throwing pills down a person's throat until they react violently with each other.

[–]morpheousmarty 1 point2 points ago

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He's just trying it out. If he wants new legs he can just jump in a pit and, bam, he starts a new life.

[–]FreeDirt 1 point2 points ago

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tl;dr - LOGIC.

[–]oentje13 12 points13 points ago

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schizophrenia

That would be Multiple personality disorder. Schizophrenia just gives you delusions.

[–][deleted] 52 points53 points ago

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Chain chomp

[–]Kemuel 14 points15 points ago

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I was gonna suggest Piranha Plant.

[–]Pikkster 16 points17 points ago

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Piranha Plant.

[–]LFreeze 13 points14 points ago

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Bob-omb.

[–]Ocarina654 1 point2 points ago

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[–]farceur318 9 points10 points ago

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Turns out that repeatedly jumping over lava pits can be dangerous.

[–]AlphaKlams 7 points8 points ago

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He just hasn't gotten his mushroom yet.

[–]dare2dan 5 points6 points ago

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Clearly a red-shell. Cuts the legs right out from under you.

[–]Pikkster 5 points6 points ago

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Piranha Plant.

[–]Furthur 7 points8 points ago

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he let his diabetes get out of control, who would have thought all those stars and flowers contained so much sugar.

[–]S7evyn 3 points4 points ago

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The man jumped several times his own height. Legs aren't designed for that much impact force.

[–]Melnorme 6 points7 points ago

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An obese man jumps and runs everywhere. This the result. Do not pity him. With every spoonful of pasta, he condemned himself to ruin.

[–]nova20 25 points26 points ago

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Who eats pasta with a spoon?

[–]Narfff 4 points5 points ago

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Who doesn't? If it's spaghetti I will eat it with a fork and spoon. Roll up spaghetti on spoon with fork, done. So much easier.

[–]viciousbreed 2 points3 points ago

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Aren't you supposed to use the spoon in polite company? I'm never invited to anything involving polite company, so fuck that. But I heard it once.

[–]africanrhino 5 points6 points ago

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mario was clearly fat. he ended up getting blood circulation problems and they had to take his legs in order to save his life. With Luigi's death and not being as active, he started slipping slowly into dementia where he believes he lived as a target employee. his son clinging to hope that his father will remember a better time dresses as luigi takes him though a tour of his memories. mario,being depressed, just sees this as a reminder of what he has lost. his mobility. his peach. the never ending supply of stars. most of all his missed his ability to use the tail. ...

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]suivethefirst 2 points3 points ago

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I like it except he clearly says it's Mario's son dressed as Luigi. tl;dr?

[–]abomb999 2 points3 points ago

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Diabetes is a bitch.

[–]wettam 2 points3 points ago

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Piranha plant accident

[–]hurrikenux 2 points3 points ago

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He must have seen the Super Mario Brothers movie.

[–]ike_tyson 1 point2 points ago

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ha ha awesome.

[–]ike_tyson 1 point2 points ago

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ha ha awesome.

[–]redditorfor16days 6 points7 points ago

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diabeetus. he's fat. luigi's fine, because he's not a porker.

[–]butchersblade 1 point2 points ago

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Hit by turtle hammers too many times.

[–]MadeInAMinute 1 point2 points ago

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Lupus.

[–]Ike_Broflovski 1 point2 points ago

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Its not Lupus.

[–]Namco51 1 point2 points ago

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Also, Diabeetus

[–]jackHD 115 points116 points ago

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Harsh they still put feet flaps on those wheel chairs. Talk about rubbing it in.

[–]Funkit 17 points18 points ago

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Yeah they really pulled his leg on that one.

[–]rctorment87 3 points4 points ago

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I asked him why they kept the foot flaps on. He said he was stumped.

[–]hyperhummingbird 63 points64 points ago

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At first I thought it was just an old guy without legs, and I thought oh, how sad. But then I realized it was Mario, and I thought THAT'S THE SADDEST THING EVER.

[–]LonelyNixon 7 points8 points ago

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It hits you when you look outside and see the smiling mountain. That said, mario has done more in his lifetime before losing his legs than anyone has ever done with legs. He used them to the fullest and you shouldn't mourn him. How many of us have jumped between planets?

[–]CompanyMan 334 points335 points ago

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Lt. DANNNN ICE CREAAAAM

[–]PubLiic 181 points182 points ago

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[–]Kingdomdude 11 points12 points ago

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wow I watched this way too long waiting for Lt Dan to do something.

[–]thebeefytaco 44 points45 points ago

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YOU AINT GOT NO LEGS LT. DAN.

[–]Tron22 6 points7 points ago

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... I know Forest.

[–]seblasto 5 points6 points ago

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Yes, I know that.

[–]wickedcold 1 point2 points ago

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And now you've got magic legs!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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That is my all time favorite film. It has EVERYTHING in it.

[–]ducttape36 2 points3 points ago

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my favorite part is when jenny rapes the retarded boy and then leaves.

[–]Noyjeetut 56 points57 points ago

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At least his penis is intact so Princess Toadstool can still ignore it.

[–]nova20 5 points6 points ago

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At his age, I don't think it would work anyway without some sort of medical help.

[–]redditorfor16days 19 points20 points ago

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[–]ignanima 3 points4 points ago

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maybe that's what the star on the dresser is for?

[–]Neato 1 point2 points ago

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I'm guessing that's so he can OD on star power when he gets tired of living.

[–]gabriot 24 points25 points ago

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not depressing, just life.

Shouldn't have jumped on that piranha plant

[–]Mister_Slick 23 points24 points ago

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Depressing? Depends how you look at it. I see this picture as two brothers that have supported each other throughout the years, even in old age. It's quite endearing to see that Luigi is still right there with him.

"Remember the time you freaked out in that creepy old mansion?" "Yeah, yeah. How about that time you had to get airlifted back onto the go-kart track? They looked like they were struggling a bit, hey tubby?" "Oh shut up, I'd still kick your ass on the track any day of the week... If I could reach the pedals." They both laughed between lemonade and Scotch Finger biscuits.

[–]LonelyNixon 8 points9 points ago

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Exactly. There is a tragic irony in mario not having legs, but he lived a long and fulfilling life with family by his side.

[–]cycophuk 32 points33 points ago

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Guess he didn't throw the Bomb-omb far enough.

[–]br14n 12 points13 points ago

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My girlfriend explained it to me...

Well, Mario obviously had to have his legs amputated due to all of his senseless jumping on mushrooms, turtles, and whatever the hell else happened to cross his path. Luigi, though old, being the second player, didn't end up abusing his body as much as Mario did. This second player status used to make Luigi extremely bitter and resentful, causing him to drink heavily and even experiment with the mushrooms, but look who's laughing now. Well, no one's really laughing because it's extremely sad, but at least he's got his legs.

And don't feel too bad for Mario. I mean, homeboy got to fly, shoot fire balls, bang princesses, and at times be invinceable. Dude had a good life.

[–]thedbp 5 points6 points ago

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seeing the clothes he is wearing, he is still able to shoot fireballs.

[–]SAMDOT 8 points9 points ago

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This was only somewhat depressing until I realized who that was, and then it got really fucking depressing.

[–][deleted] 19 points20 points ago*

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Stomping has changed.

Super Mario Bros. 4: Guns of the Koopas

"The war is over... But... We still have a score to settle" - Liquid Bowser

[–]Leaves_You_Hanging 17 points18 points ago

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Mario??..... Mario?!?!? MMMMAAAAAARRRRRRRIIIIIIIOOOOOO!!!!!!

[–]weatheredruins 2 points3 points ago

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TIME PARADOX

[–]FishPhoenix 2 points3 points ago

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ID tagged Koopas carrying ID tagged coins...

[–]Disco11 6 points7 points ago

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He didn't listen to the sunscreen song!

Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone.

-Baz Luhrmann-

[–]alfalfasprouts 7 points8 points ago

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Why is he so sad? All he has to do is eat that star in the corner and he'll be fine!

[–]cr0n1c 14 points15 points ago

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You're all wrong. He had diabetes.

[–]Scaredoftriangles 12 points13 points ago

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He couldn't dia-beat it

[–]t3yrn 12 points13 points ago

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-groan-

[–]Hurlaroid 5 points6 points ago

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Where can I buy this?

Seriously.

[–]notgf3 14 points15 points ago

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I'm the guy who made it. If you'd like to talk about a print, email me at kat@notgf3.com

[–]enroxorz 3 points4 points ago

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Fuck those kids, I dont like people playing on my phone!

[–]TheDownvoteDefender 3 points4 points ago

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Somebody give that guy a mushroom.

[–]Pavelent 2 points3 points ago

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I feel like the aged Mario is us in the future--reflecting on the glorious days of gaming before it all turned to shit. And we will be sitting there sulking, wondering why we ever sold our super nintendos or n64s.

[–]AShaqFreethrow 2 points3 points ago

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At least he has a star.

[–]ignanima 2 points3 points ago

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doesn't do much good unless he can roll downhill at them.

[–]lukasb 2 points3 points ago

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"One always finds one's burden again. But Mario teaches the higher fidelity that negates the gods and raises rocks. He too concludes that all is well. This universe henceforth without a master seems to him neither sterile nor futile. Each atom of that stone, each mineral flake of that night filled mountain, in itself forms a world. The struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a man's heart. One must imagine Mario happy."

[–]richie311gocavs 2 points3 points ago

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Check your blood sugar and check it often, diabeetus Mario.

[–]lgweck86764 2 points3 points ago

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assassination attpemt failed by Bowser, Bullet Bill hit him in the legs

[–]sandwichez 2 points3 points ago

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I've done a couple Nintendo pieces in a similar vein.. (Figured I'd post here instead of a new thread) The Lamentation of Pac-Man and Burger Time

Although I'm not sure they're as depressing as Mario there. That's just tragic.

[–]MPair-E 2 points3 points ago

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The fact that it was designed to be as depressing as possible is kind of what makes this not so depressing for me. I don't know. It's cool, but the contrived sadness of it just sort of bounces off me.

[–]TheUsableWeb 2 points3 points ago

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what is so depressing about it? he still has a star left so no one can fuck with him!

[–]smexypelican 2 points3 points ago

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Fortunately he farmed 99 extra lives in 1-1.

[–]PegLegGreg 7 points8 points ago

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He cut them off himself so people would stop asking him to save princesses and shit.

[–]ColHunterGathers 2 points3 points ago

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Looks like jumpman has become stumpman.

[–]myeverymovment 2 points3 points ago

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yea, who wants to push an old guy in a wheelchair around all day?

[–]eatsam 1 point2 points ago

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Maybe I dont't get it. Look at the happy hills outside :D And the star! And the candle to the right :D

[–]fadedsun 1 point2 points ago

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I have a tender spot in my heart for cripples, bastards and broken things...

[–]dianthe 1 point2 points ago

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Depressing, but a great artwork nevertheless.

[–]gentlemandinosaur 1 point2 points ago

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Just realized that was Luigi. Had to read it in a comment... before I noticed.

Now, I am really sad.

[–]maveco 1 point2 points ago

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Super Mariold

[–]Zylire 1 point2 points ago

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The Hills Have Eyes

[–]mjwassmer 1 point2 points ago

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I'd play this game

[–]o0DrWurm0o 1 point2 points ago

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Are you surprised by my tears, sir?

[–]zalbo 1 point2 points ago

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Who is the original artist?

[–]Danielrmk 1 point2 points ago

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Diabetes caused by Toads cakes...

[–]koshercowboy 1 point2 points ago

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Looks like he's going to make them an offer of a powerup they won't be able to refuse.

[–]humorlessgumroot 1 point2 points ago

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Mario needs some prosthetics. I would put rockets on his. Rocket Mario would make perfect sense.

[–]mostlycareful 1 point2 points ago

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Just give him a mushroom.

[–]oep4 1 point2 points ago

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Actually, I would say that is the least depressing cripple I have ever seen, considering he already spent more time using his legs than most videogame characters anyways.

[–]rataxes11 1 point2 points ago

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Psilocybin side effects.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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FOR GODSAKE MARIO JUST GRAB THE STAR AND BUST THE FUCK OUT OF THERE!

[–]phazenator 1 point2 points ago*

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Why is this depressing? He lost his legs, got old, but lived a happy and fulfilling life, and there was cake.

[–]SemiSeriousSam 1 point2 points ago

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Awwww, why would you envision such a sad end for our beloved hero?

[–]aheadwarp9 1 point2 points ago

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Those damn piranha plants...

[–]TkTech 1 point2 points ago

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This is depressing by itself, then you realize it's Mario and it becomes more depressing. Then you realize/hope that's probably his son pushing him around, and you go "awwww yeah, Mario finally banged the Princess."

[–]campersdeath 5 points6 points ago

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I thought so too.. until I saw it was a guy with a green shirt.. so it's prolly Luigi. :'(

[–]TkTech 3 points4 points ago

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I reject your reality and substitute my own!

[–]HaroldPlease 1 point2 points ago

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I so want to give him a 1 UP!!!

[–]ProbablyNotAGoodSign 1 point2 points ago

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Depressing? Perhaps. Awesome? Most definitely.

[–]jisoukishi 1 point2 points ago

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I'm reminded of this song.

[–]chreez 1 point2 points ago

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This reminds me of a very chilling scene in The Pianist

[–]xirtue 1 point2 points ago

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why remove the credits sign OP?

[–]chandyland 1 point2 points ago

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