To me, this picture looks like it was taken at the exact moment the photographer reflected on his life and how he got there...

"Look at yourself Henry, a fuckin porn photographer. How proud Mother must be when she gets together with the gals for their weekly bridge games and Elise is all, "Oh my darling son Bradley just got another promotion at work!" while Mom just sits in the shame that is her son. The SMUT photographer. You wish someone had told you when you was in Art School how hard it truly is to find work as a photographer. All you've ever wanted was to photograph nature, travel to the world's most exotic locations and capture the earth's most private settings but look at you. Sitting at home, cleaning the spunk from a grown man off of your camera. It's fucking pathetic. Yeah it seemed cool at first, "Oh dude, you take pictures at PORN shoots?!!?! NO WAY!" but the glory was short-lived as your friends started respectable careers and you were stuck. Stuck like the sole of your boot to the floor after a bukkake shoot.

At least today's shoot is outdoors. Inhales Smell that sweet pure air of nature. Look at that beautiful forest just over the hill...It's amazing, breathtaking really and you are forced to take pictures of some jackass on 'roids giving it to this bimbo. It could be worse though, remember that shoot in Prague? Ugghh. You'll never look at creamed corn the same.

QUACK

Gasps

L-l-look at that gorgeous mallard! THIS! This is what you need to be photographing. The pride, the confidence, the LIFE radiating from that little prince of the pond! THAT'S what you're missing from life.

ENOUGH! Enough of the porn! Enough of the disappointment! Enough of feeling like a loser! From this day forward, you will be the world's prominent nature photographer! Your pictures will be on the cover of all the leadi-

"REALLY GUY?! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH THIS RIGHT NOW?!?! DON'T YOU KNOW HOW TO AIM YOUR DICK?! GODDAMMIT!! NONONO! YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH! SHUTIT! I FUCKING QUIT!