Fuck you if you bring this to the movie theater.

SilentD · 1 year

My wife and I haven't been to the theater together for 16 months because of this. Our son has medical problems so can't really be left with any random babysitter, and we don't want to bother others in the theater by bringing him. Plus we can't really enjoy a movie when dealing with him anyway.

Hooray for Usenet!

Prawns · 1 year

Who the hell brings a baby to watch "Loud Explosions and Screaming II" anyway?

paulasaurus · 1 year

Especially if the showing is after 8pm. I saw a baby at the midnight showing of one of the LOTR movies. I MEAN WHAT THE FUCK.

stwongbad85 · 1 year

At Harry Potter yesterday (forever alone)....infant started crying during the opening scene. I considered leaving to go to the box office and politely asking for a refund or a pass to see the movie at a latter time/date. ....chick a few seats down says "are you serious"..."I didn't pay $15 dollars to listen to your baby cry for 2 hrs!"..."Shut that baby up or I WILL!" lady took the baby out and we all enjoyed the rest of the film in peace. I thought she was a bit harsh, but by Merlin's Beard, I thank that young woman from the bottom of my heart.

TheWolfofMibu · 1 year

When someone has a crying baby in a fucking movie theater, I walk over to them and kindly ask that they take the child outside because people are trying to watch a movie then I return to my seat to finish the film.

winnar72 · 1 year

Fuck movie theaters period. If it's not babies and children it's asshole adults with "smart" phones and individually wrapped candies or rattling airconditioning vents in the theater itself.

Lancey · 1 year

As a parent of a small child, I don't know why the fuck anybody would want to take a kid to the movies - I can't enjoy the film while my kid is screaming, so what's the point?

[deleted] · 1 year

I'm 25, haven't been to the movies in over two years because of my kids. I refuse to be one of those people who subject others to that annoyance. Oh MJR how I miss you so.

akallio9000 · 1 year

I stopped going to movies more than 20 years ago because of all the noise from the babies. These babies were old enough to drive.

cyberpop · 1 year

I have never brought someone else's crying baby to the theater.

DIGGYRULES · 1 year

A guy I work with and his wife had a baby last year. He had always told me how wrong I was for not taking my young children everywhere I went...for staying home when I couldn't get a sitter.

He and his wife take their baby EVERYWHERE. Everywhere they go with single, childless friends. If the baby starts howling and crying, they don't even care about the other patrons. They honestly do not care. Their theory is that babies cry and people should get used to it.

FUCK THAT. If I am lucky enough to get a babysitter, about TWICE A YEAR, I do NOT want to sit in a restaurant or theater listening to SOMEBODY ELSE'S kid screaming.

dorei22 · 1 year

I love kids. Sure sometimes they can be annoying. What I hate is parents.

Just the other day I had some family of about 12 come in with 6 kids. This was 11 at night for Transformers (sure your kids can watch that, I don't mind, it's your children). However:

Your 4 year old is not allowed to run in laps around the movie theater, crawl all over the railing, climb the chairs, stand on my lap, try to run past us making us all move our legs, while you sit there and ignore him. I was once 4 years old, and I once had parents. Yes he is controllable.
Your 6 year old is not allowed to kick the railing as hard as he can for the entire movie, making our connected chairs rattle and shake. While you sit there ignoring him.
Your children are not allowed to shriek and yell during the movie, and you do nothing.
If I work there and am on my day off, and haven't had you thrown out (because I CAN), don't get pissy when I remove your 4 year old from my lap, and tell him he has to sit down and be still, in a calm friendly voice.
If your toddler throws a large cup of drink all over me on purpose, I am not mad at him or you. I understand. What I am mad about is that you complain that I didn't go get you a new one immediately instead of trying to wipe the floor near your baby's feet up so he doesn't slip and hurt himself.

Jewsinmyshoes · 1 year

I know do you believe some people don't even put these fucking things on silent or vibrate. The fucking nerve.

photoddgrapher · 1 year

Even worse are the parents that bring kids to scary movies or R-rated, PG-13 rated shit. WTF are you people thinking?

Wyrmshadow · 1 year

Promises are like children in a theater.

They should be carried out immediately.

SevenDeadlyNinjas · 1 year

Now I can understand a kid on a plane. They can't be legally put in luggage and stowed, so i guess they have to sit in the cabin.

But movie theaters? Calla friend and give them a couple bucks to watch your hellspawn so you can watch the movie and actually enjoy it. Just like everyone ELSE who paid to see said movie.

hired_goon · 1 year

there was one of these in an R RATED MOVIE!! who the fuck brings a kid to an R rated movie!!!

if I were watching Kung Fu panda or something and there were kids being disruptive, well, that's just part of the territory. But R rated?

FreonTrip · 1 year

My first daughter will be born next month, and you know what? I couldn't agree more. This seems like a pretty decent summer for movies, so I'm hitting the theater while I can. For the next three years it'll be off-limits unless we can find a sitter. Kudos antojoso, and upvoted.

gosuprobe · 1 year

Certain AMC Theatres have "Cinema Suites". Luxury leather recliners, 32 or 48 per theatre MAXIMUM, decent restaurant menu (not overpriced, good selection, and quite delicious), a button to summon a waiter that brings you food and drink, a hot towel and a mint at the end and NO ONE UNDER 21 ALLOWED. The price for this extravagance? Normal ticket price. It's quite simply the finest theatre experience I've ever encountered.

60cyclehum · 1 year

I was on a flight to somewhere sitting next to a parent with a two year old on his lap. During boarding he helps the child gulp down a Starbucks iced coffee... 15 minutes after takeoff the kid went completely nonlinear and stayed that way. I never forgot how the parent assumed that it was normal...

1 year

[deleted]

MontegoBarbados · 1 year

Crying babies are silenced or brought out of the theater (eventually) by embarrassed parents after getting annoyed glares from others. Yeah, hearing crying babies in theaters sucks, but there's worse..

What has ruined way more films for me is sitting in front of a group of teens heckling the movie. LOTR3 was the worst. I sat in front of a group of teen boys that constantly pointed out special effects, and told fag jokes whenever Gandolf was on screen. And they weren't whispering, because they wanted the whole fucking theater to hear their brilliance.

let_pretend · 1 year

You know that brief moment of silence all movies have right after the trailers end but before the actual film begins? Well during this screening of "The Incredible Hulk" a toddler starts crying right at that moment, and the next I hear is some guy yell from way back "WHAT THE FUCK!", which then riles up the crowd and all hell breaks loose as the audience starts booing the kid and chucking popcorn at the parents.

I've never seen a crowd turn on a toddler so fast!

Spotpuff · 1 year

I've never seen this (maybe I'm at the wrong movies) but I see people with cell phones on full brightness texting in the movies all the time.

They are complete and utter assholes.

PedanticPanda · 1 year

What? What?! Who actually does this?!

Happy_Kitteh · 1 year

When we went to see Transformers 3 someone brought their toddler to the screening, the evil shit cried alllllll the way through the first half. The movie's too old for a 3 year old anyway. Keep them away from adult films. grr.

Vietname · 1 year

Upvoted so hard I pulled a hamstring.

mcizawa · 1 year

I once had to sit next to a ten year old during some suspense movie. Fucking awful. Kid would not stfu.

mcizawa · 1 year

I paid $40 to take my grandma and little brother to see Harry Potter at the IMAX. A small child seated further down the row smacked her feet on the ground for the full two and a half hours. She was wearing light-up sneakers. It was like someone switched on a disco ball in one quarter of the theater.

count-crapula · 1 year

Why, do people bring babies to the cinema?

tobori · 1 year

This, and the people on their cells, people talking through the film, those arrogant little bastards who like kicking your seat and that one tall person that just HAS to sit front of you...Fuck it i'll wait for the DVD...

ReddotAddict · 1 year

...or the restaurant that I was having a peaceful dinner at, or the freaking bowling alley, or the bar.

Frydafly · 1 year

Or on a plane........ Cries in the sky are not any less annoying.

odysseus88 · 1 year

When I went to see "28 Days Later" in theaters, some chick actually brought her baby with her. How fucked up is that kid going to be by the time he's 4?

crankyoldwhitedude · 1 year

as a 30 y.o. I took my son with me to see I think it was ST Generations. No one wanted to go w/me, I had no babysitter. He was 1 y.o. and he literally was the quietest baby I had ever seen. He slept like a rock. I got a way w/it but I knew he was the exception not the rule. I had made myself a promise, the minute he started crying I was out of there. I never had to challenge that rule thankfully. I would like to think that had he cried I would've kept my promise to myself. as a 40 y.o. my perpective is the same: if you want to do it, fine but the second the kid cries, you leave. no excuses, no second chances. Unfortunately most people won't operate that way because most people are twatwaffles.

So I pretty much agree w/the poster here.

Prufrock451 · 1 year

I have a 14-month-old son.

I hereby raise my right hand. I swear to Reddit by all that is good and holy that my son will not go to a movie theater until he is at least 4 years old, and that he will not go to a PG-rated movie for several years after that, when his mother and I are certain that he has the maturity and attention span to behave appropriately for an entire film.

I will also put my phone in my pocket and leave it there once the trailers start. I will not bring chewing gum into the movie theater, nor will I allow my son to do so. Furthermore, I promise not to cut a hole in the bottom of the popcorn bucket unless we have previously discussed that scenario.

EDIT: Downvoted. Okay, I'll go ahead and cut a hole in the popcorn bucket.

wandrngfool · 1 year

Saw Harry Potter, of course there's a 2 year old right behind us... screams when the lights dim, screams when the previews start, screams when the frickin logo comes on the screen. Luckily after that the mom just grabs him and leaves. I was thinking THANK GOD! I'm sure with everyone around me. I did feel bad for the mom for a second then realized she was dumb enough to bring a 2 year old to a Harry Potter movie.

PlNG · 1 year

If you can't get them thrown out, always pack a scary mask. Make the fuckers regret coming with their kid.

Parent: "Hey kid, we're going to the movies!" Kid: "loudest scream on earth, probably as loud as when you have to take them for shots"

Volkamar · 1 year

This should give you some satisfaction then.

leaptheman · 1 year

That's why I don't go to the theater. I get better quality sound and picture at home (I'm in a relatively small town, we don't have the amazazing theaters), I don't have to deal with frat retards that think the theater is an excellent spot for conversation, and I don't have to deal with crying babies.

On the flip side, now we have a daughter on the way, so even more reason to just wait and see it at home. Le shrug.

adamzep91 · 1 year

Or on a plane. Seriously.

ronintetsuro · 1 year

Did you bring your baby?

Babies don't watch this.

Take the seed outside.

Leave it in the streets.

Run it over after the show.

Chickpea123uk · 1 year

My first child was a couple of months old when the Fellowship of the Ring came out. We just couldn't get a babysitter and we were so keen to see the movie on the big screen that we took the baby to the cinema. We already agreed that if he made so much as a mouse's squeak we would take him to the foyer immediately and try to quiet him before going back in, or if we couldn't quiet him, we would go home. He slept and fed on and off throughout the movie but never made a single sound. At the end, a guy sitting close to us leaned over and congratulated us on "a spectacularly well-behaved baby".

He had been pre-natally conditioned to going to the movies. Whilst I was pregant we went to see the Blair Witch Project, and the combination of hand-held camera wobble, pregnancy sickness, and nachos made me puke in the cinema. And we also went to see Alien Resurrection much later in the pregnancy, and the baby kicked like mad all the way through. Fuck 3D - try watching an Alien movie with a living thing trying to kick its way out of you. THAT'S cinema verite.

(if you want to check the release dates of those movies, I may be conflating 3 pregnancies, but in my memory they were all 1997/98)

jsellout · 1 year

ALSO! open your god damn candy before the fucking movie starts! I know you don't want to eat it yet, THAT'S OK! Just open that shit and set it aside for when you DO want to eat it.

SoysauceMafia · 1 year

A theater opened up in my hometown that has a 17+ policy, no babies allowed, a goddamn bar... and BACON popcorn.

It's glorious

mtme · 1 year

A family of five walked into AvP: Requiem. There was a baby, a toddler, and a kid who looked 8. They actually lasted an hour. I was surprised. Of course they wouldnt leave when all three started to cry. That was the big bad police officer's job.

knifebucket · 1 year

When I saw Harry Potter #4, I went to a 10pm showing, and some dumb bitch brought a screaming baby that was so loud he literally drowned out the dialogue. I eventually got up and told her "You need to take that baby outside. He's too young for this movie."

So she took the baby out. Then she chased me down after the movie and got up in my face and said "That was the rudest thing anybody has ever said to me! I can't believe you did that!"

I was so flabbergasted, I really didn't know how to react. I told her "thanks anyway" and walked off, but of course later I thought of a million better things to have said. *sigh*

Tombofsoldier · 1 year

I, sir, would never bring a jpeg to a movie theater!

BroadStreetElite · 1 year

Seriously movie theaters in general suck. My local one sucks because it is attached to a mall, so it is impossible to go to a film on a weekend because the place is crawling with the rudest 13 year old punks you have ever seen, they literally walk in and out of films all night with phones acting loud and obnoxious, I even heard a girl who couldn't have been more than 11 or 12 tell an usher to fuck himself when he wouldn't admit them to an R rated film.

Then theres always the loud adults, or the people who smuggle boxes of chinese food into the theater so it smells delicious but it also annoying as fuck to hear them making so much noise while eating.

I dont even buy popcorn when I go to a theater, Ill buy an overpriced drink to support the revenue of the theater since they don't make as much off ticket sales, but even then I don't like supporting them, every screen at my theater(There are 15) have technical problems, the speakers are old and some need to be replaced, so on certain films dialogue cannot be heard, or bass heavy scenes have a tinny sound.

IMAX theaters are about the only places I have positive experiences anymore.

Tidusblue · 1 year

I can understand an early evening show during the week or something, but don't bring a baby or little kid to opening night of a sold out show.

joculator · 1 year

Fuck you if you have your toddler pay for something when I'm on line behind you....

"now give the man your money....now he's going to give you change..."

mypetridish · 1 year

my brother brought his kid to the harry potter show and his kid behaved well. at one point when the kid had enough and wanted out, he left the theater and brought her along.

that is good parenting and very unselfish

ketchupkid · 1 year

Fuck all babies and lil kids! I'M SICK OF THEM! SICK SICK SICK!!!

1 year

[deleted]

Blueberry_Yum_Yum · 1 year

Fuck you if you bring this to a restaurant.

Hijack32 · 1 year

Nothing worse than a screaming fucking kid while you're trying to get your Inception on.

Smeagol1123 · 1 year

What IS this thing? Fucking gross.

hilaryyy · 1 year

Purchase movie tickets. Purchase 3 boxes/bags of gummy bears. Throw a gummy bear at the source of irritating noises every 15 seconds for catharsis. If they are confused and leave, bonus catharsis.

[deleted] · 1 year

These things don't even know what movies are. Seriously, fuck that shit.

NotWorkingAtWork2011 · 1 year

Look up McDain's Restaurant in Monroeville, PA.

It is the pride of suburban Pittsburgh.

Banned all children under 6.

ghostrider176 · 1 year

It's posts like this that make me sad I can only upvote once.

Tarman83 · 1 year

As a father of 2, I agree. 3.5 yo and a 6 mo. When we've gone to the theater, the grandparents are watching the kids. Fortunately though, the theater "experience" sucks so bad, we usually just rent, eat OUR (healthy) food in our quiet house on our comfy couch. TL;DR: Fuck the theater. It's distracting, smells and costs too much.

unhapztoms · 1 year

Years ago I saw Skeleton Key in the theater (don't ask). It was a late showing, probably 9pm or later and someone brought a baby in. You brought a baby in to see a "horror" movie? Fuck you.

giraffebreath · 1 year

Someone brought their two young kids to the Harry Potter movie.

"Mommy, what's that? Why's everything all white? Why's Harry there?"

Commentary like that... for every scene. HONESTLY. I don't even dislike children but you are not allowed to ruin the last moments of my childhood.

cornholio12 · 1 year

They should have armed guards at the gates of movie theaters to kill anyone under 18 (without an exemption card), and anyone over 18 (without an exemption card).

You can renew the card annually at your local DmV/SoS office.

You are forced to watch a movie you haven't seen with others. If you fail the test, you don't get your card.

DomicsGirlfriend · 1 year

Some lady brought her crying baby to Deathly Hallows part 2. At first it sounded like a woman trying to stifle her moaning, like she was getting action in the back of the theatre.

Then I hear the baby and think, "Are you kidding me." ಠ_ಠ

apextek · 1 year

took a 4 year old to see mega mind, me and her mom had a couple lauyhs over something in the movie. the 4 year old turns around and whispers as loud as she can. do you mind! Im trying to watch a movie! can you keep it down?!

FlipprDolphin · 1 year

I was a manager at Dolphin 19 in Miami, FL for a few years until I moved in 2008. We kick people out, we go in the theatre to tell them to be quiet, we check tickets for opening weekend releases to make sure no one sneaks in and if they paid for child and they are an adult (we make them get out of line and go to customer service, idiots). We all have walkie talkies and are on top of things like this. Child crying? Take the child out for a while till the baby stops. Child keep crying, get a refund. Teenagers being rude, get out.

I love kicking people out :D

gordond · 1 year

When my wife and I both want to see a film, we basically take turns. She sees it while I watch our son and then we switch off. True story.

kiteless · 1 year

I took my 3 year old to see Cars 2 the weekend after it opened (6:50 pm showing) and he sat in his chair and watched the movie like a perfect gentleman. Except for one instance when something exploded and he yelled "FIRE!" at the top of his lungs just as the sound subsided. Made me laugh pretty hard. Glad he didn't get arrested.

So not all kids are assholes. And if they are, chances are, their parents are assholes too.

necropantser · 1 year

As a parent of young children I have recently discovered how awesome drive-in movie theaters are.

$7 per adult (children under 5 are free)
You get to see two movies for that cost.
You can bring your own food.
You can set up your car such that when the children get tired they can fall asleep without bothering anyone.
You can adjust the volume to the desired state
If your child is screaming uncontrollably you can close all the doors, roll up the windows and nobody is bothered.

stupernan · 1 year

went to go see the descent i believe... a black woman in her 20's had two children in the theater, right off the bat a bunch of people were giving her a "why the fuck is your kid here" kinda look, but she ignores them.

By the first scary part, they're screaming there fucking nuts off, so she starts yelling at them to shut the fuck up, but of course they ignore her and scream in terror anyways.

we hear a random dude yell at her saying "hey we're trying to watch a fucking movie here lady" she retorts with "Come say that to my face bitch! if any ya'll have a problem you come up to me and say it"

movie attendants shortly arrive and she fights back with them about "her having a right to watch" etc, only once a cop comes and asks what the problem is does she leave, the whole theater applauds.

Comics
/r/comics	/r/webcomics
/r/vertical	/r/f7u12
/r/ragenovels	/r/AdviceAtheists
Image macros	Screenshots/text
/r/lolcats	/r/screenshots
/r/AdviceAnimals	/r/desktops
/r/Demotivational	/r/facepalm (Facebook)
/r/reactiongifs	/r/DesktopDetective
Wallpaper	Animals
/r/wallpaper	/r/aww
/r/wallpapers	/r/cats
The SFWPorn Network	/r/TrollingAnimals
	/r/deadpets
	/r/birdpics
	/r/foxes
Photography	Un-moderated pics
/r/photography	/r/AnythingGoesPics
/r/photocritique	/r/images
/r/HDR
/r/windowshots
/r/PictureChallenge
Misc	New reddits
/r/misc	/r/britpics
/r/gifs	Imaginary Network
/r/dataisbeautiful	/r/thennnow
/r/picrequests	/r/SpecArt
/r/doodles	/r/LookWhoIMet
	/r/timelinecovers
	/r/MemesIRL
	/r/OldSchoolCool
	/r/photoshopbattles
	/r/PastAndPresentPics .

pics

For an image subreddit with fewer restrictions, check out /r/misc!

Spoiler code

Rules

Links

MODERATORS

pics

For an image subreddit with fewer restrictions, check out /r/misc!

Spoiler code

Rules

Links

MODERATORS

you'll need to login or register to do that

create a new account

login