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all 37 comments

[–]TamiusUpper 8 points9 points ago

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BE A MAN AND TAKE OUT YOUR HUNTIN' KNIFE AND SHOVE IT DOWN THE TOP! SHOW THAT PANSY CAN WHO'S BOSS!!!

[–]myschie 0 points1 point ago

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Or use, you know... your thumb.

[–]DoctorNose 0 points1 point ago

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PCP, it's a hell of a drug.

[–]hotsauce285 4 points5 points ago

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[–]tin_dog 1 point2 points ago

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Attached to my tool belt.

[–]Nesman64 1 point2 points ago

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Just use your thumb to press the flap in. Also, it makes a neat fizz when bits of your flesh are sheared on in the process.

[–]DeadDave 1 point2 points ago

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Perfect chance to practice that finger-of-death trick. HI-YAH.

[–]tom2275 1 point2 points ago

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So, apparently nobody else here is old enough to remember when all beer cans opened like this

[–]Sjokomelk 0 points1 point ago

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When would that be?

[–]tom2275 0 points1 point ago

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I don't know when they stopped making them, early seventies I presume when I was a small child. But I remember my Dad drinking from cans like these and people having to be cautious not to swallow the disc of aluminum that would sometimes fall into the can. The archaeological dig photo makes me seem much older than I am (43).

[–]OldGreyTroll 1 point2 points ago

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[–]pickoneforme 1 point2 points ago

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in the knife drawer.

[–]davidhero 0 points1 point ago

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It looks like a cyclops

[–]Quarkster 0 points1 point ago

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God wants you to shotgun it

[–]Saac 0 points1 point ago

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With your pull tab.

[–]Loki240SX[!] 0 points1 point ago

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Just put a dab of mercury on it. It'll be open in a jiffy.

[–]soggy_cereal 0 points1 point ago

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Does mercury melt aluminum?

[–]Loki240SX[!] 0 points1 point ago

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No. But it does react with aluminum.

[–]manopsony 1 point2 points ago

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Need some gallium first.

[–]thisishim 0 points1 point ago

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A real man would shot gun that..

[–]astrolabos 0 points1 point ago

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Under my thumb

[–]Wimmywamwamwozzle 0 points1 point ago

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It's called a churchkey for a reason.

[–]wheredallthesyrupgo 0 points1 point ago

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TIME TO START THROWING STUFF

[–]signspam 0 points1 point ago

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In the knife drawer?

[–]OldSpider 0 points1 point ago

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Just throw it at someone. It'll open.

[–]Chionophile 0 points1 point ago

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Get a can opener and take the entire top right off.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Make a call to Morgan Freeman.

[–]syroncoda 0 points1 point ago

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[–]soggy_cereal 0 points1 point ago

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No perf?

[–]hehasbalrogsocks 0 points1 point ago

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A gentle touch with my lightsaber and all your troubles will be forgotten.

[–]konungursvia 0 points1 point ago

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Going to get the Holy Swiss Army Knife.

[–]semisilver 0 points1 point ago

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He's having a soda, and laughing his ass off.

[–]BoAd 0 points1 point ago

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Take my pen knife, my good man.

[–]Llamarama 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]coolimabob 0 points1 point ago

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[–]Anovan 0 points1 point ago

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time for somebody to learn how to shotgun.

[–]oh_hi-mark -1 points0 points ago

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He's in the pocket knife I'm about to use to open this bastard.