[Foul] Bachelor Vision

duffman_oh_yeah · 1 year

fast food bag = trash can
video games = long novels
mom's basement = castle

rufifi · 1 year

I feel bad for relating to every single one.

dbtc · 1 year

I always eat at my desk

francis_goatman · 1 year

[deleted]

pandieburr · 1 year

I would replace the pic of salt and pepper with hot sauce. That's all you really need...

buddha89 · 1 year

what this needs is a beer can that is then equal to water.

Nerdster · 1 year

Hey, guy! Check out Mr Fancy over here with his pepper!

Salt is the only seasoning.

AngryafricanRW · 1 year

My room is spotless.

In Minecraft.

YeahIWillRapThat · 1 year

I sleep on the couch 'cause my bed aint made

Burger King is better, you can have it your way

Cleaning apparently makes you look real gay

Ironing, heh, not even if I'm payed.

I smell like a dead buck with B.O.

Reddit with EasyMac? Ready to go!

Closets are for bitches and high class hos

The sink's still clean if it don't overflow

(Whoa Whoa, hold up, hold up)

Socks have many uses beyond their niche

Cleans the dirty mess that got on your hitch

Kept Lt. Dan's feet dry in a ditch.

Even polish off your knob, if there aint a bitch

(Word, now that we got that straight)

Microwaves are ovens with no knobs to turn

Meat is what a grown ass man yearns

They forgot Cayenne, for that "subtle" burn

Dishwashers and Cabinets: Hard to discern.

B.S., we brush our teeth (almost) every day

Men watch porn? What hearsay!

This shit was written by an uptight broad

Be it a sister, a girlfriend, of even a mom

While the bitches in the house might applaud

I hope the men in the house at least guffawed

Plattast · 1 year

Wish I had a dishwasher to leave my plates in.

DelendaEst · 1 year

Hey, this could be a bachelorette version too!

....right? :(

NothingReallyEnds · 1 year

I've never bought salt. I have two kinds of pepper, though.

squigglez · 1 year

I don't get it? It's just 8 pairs of identical pictures? What am I missing?

toxicityj · 1 year

well TIL i'm a 16 year old female foul bachelor

Nawara_Ven · 1 year

[deleted]

aalabrash · 1 year

Last one got me.

twitch135 · 1 year

Its posts like this that inspire an 'Operation:Sort Your Life Out' that lasts for maybe 2 days before I fall back into the same pattern. I mean, housework is hard.

fatalerrrpr · 1 year

My eyes lit up when I saw the ironing board and I thought, other people do that too?

AlyoshaV · 1 year

Somebody add a vacuum = doctor

Bachelor? Yeah, maybe.
Disgusting?? Oh fuck yeah.

I've had a boil on my taint for a few days and its been bugging the fuck out of me. It hurt to sit, it hurt to shit, it hurt to do a lot of things.

I tried scrubbing the area with alcohol, and then poking a pin through it, but it wasn't working. First squatting over a mirror and then propping the mirror up on a hamper full of dirty laundry.
I tried the boiling bottle technique, but I don't think I was patient enough.

So, today I had a great idea. I got out the antiseptics, and disinfectants, and the alcohol, and the vacuum. Its a Hoover wind tunnel since someone will ask.

The first shot I didn't quite get it centred where I wanted it but it was still over the mark. Even though it was on that spot for maybe half a second there was still evil juices flowing from my taint. When I got it centred properly, and left it for several seconds I could practically feel the magic as the juices were flowing from my body and into the vacuum hose, coating the inside of it. I'm going to have a hard time making my vacuum not look like a crime scene. But relief is upon me!!

itsfloppy · 1 year

I used to show apartments to future potential occupants and the majority of them were occupied. 99% of the boys/bachelors apartments were spotless. The girls are the slobs. I couldn't believe the filth.

Darrian · 1 year

Two things are incorrect.

One - the vegetable = death one. Every bachelor has gone through at least one or both of these phases, and that's being poor, or just plain lazy or forgetful so that you end up with no food in the house. During these phases you could give me a carrot and that would be a meal to me.

Two - the salt/pepper = spice cabinet one. Any seasoned bachelor knows spices are your friend. You can find all sorts of kinds relatively cheap, they last forever, and can turn the blandest of foods into glorious meals fit for a king. Tired of that chicken flavored Ramen? Crack open some of your favorite spices and sauces and cover that shit.

Tredward · 1 year

Nailed it.

TheMarshma · 1 year

Looks dangerously similar to weed vision.

CannibalCow · 1 year

I don't get the coffin one.

[deleted] · 1 year

YouPorn isn't exercise unless you put on wrist weights.

Glenners · 1 year

Using the dishwasher as a cupboard is actually a pretty efficient use of space if you want a dishwasher.

revolutionsnow · 1 year

[deleted]

JimmyCrackCrack · 1 year

Everything except the microwave=oven and the salt and pepper=entire spice rack

Got to have standards man, cook yourself a good, well prepared meal before you work up a sweat strenuously masturbating and jizzing in to your socks

TacoMcD · 1 year

To be fair, a cook uses salt and/or pepper in everything.

Decatf · 1 year

Relevant

internetsuperstar · 1 year

Anyone else look at the delicious cheeseburger and immediately expect some shittier food to be on the right?

JasoneBourne · 1 year

This is like those Senior humor emails my grandma forwards to everyone, except seemingly targeted at 20 somethings?

[deleted] · 1 year

What if you relate more to what's on the right than the left?

Fenris_uy · 1 year

what is that next to the salt?

Erectwhenhappy · 1 year

It' sad and disturbing exactly how close to reality it really is, yet I'm weirdly proud if it.

Avengerr · 1 year

The further I got down that list, the expression on my face became much more sad.

KillWithFire · 1 year

Bachelor? Nay, good sir, this is the eye of the college student, very poor, and/or the lazy.

OG-Eazy · 1 year

Nah you're just a mess..or maybe I'm too tidy.

Who's to judge?

sethky · 1 year

Good to be happily married!

[deleted] · 1 year

bachelors want to be buried in a bin of vegetables?

[deleted] · 1 year

This. Is. Prefect.

Allurex · 1 year

You can afford both salt and pepper?

clemka3 · 1 year

I'm a teenage girl who lives with her dad. This is pretty accurate... Also, this chart doesn't apply to men only.

helicopterindian · 1 year

Can I get a link to the wardrobe? That looks classy.

living_404 · 1 year

oh shit, i lost it at the socks. i didn't know this was such a common thing.

d70 · 1 year

you porn pretty much sums in up.

[deleted] · 1 year

took me a second to register what you're trying to say about the socks, but yeah, it's true.

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