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all 180 comments

[–]A_Gnarly_Penguin 313 points314 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]joeythehobo 112 points113 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]Doxt 7 points8 points ago

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That's quite a coincidence.

[–]alpad 4 points5 points ago

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That one was posted a couple of days ago, actually.

[–]mmca 1 point2 points ago

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Aww that's so cute.

[–]khalilzad95 1 point2 points ago

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[–]joeythehobo 3 points4 points ago

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I ninja edited before you posted =]

[–]curlyben 1 point2 points ago

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Should be "mother lode" or "mother-lode." </melvin>

[–]WasteofInk 2 points3 points ago

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Mothership. Motherfucker.

[–]curlyben 0 points1 point ago

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It has since been fixed.

[–]frolix8 0 points1 point ago

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You can dance if you want to.

[–]madrid1979 1 point2 points ago

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You can leave your friends behind.

[–]x755x 0 points1 point ago*

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Cause your friends don't dance, and if they don't dance, well they're no friends of mine.

[–]jacobo[S] 17 points18 points ago

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thanks! sorry i didn't have the source, i found it on my disk. Now i feel like a pirate karma whore :(

[–]toxicFork 13 points14 points ago

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Y'arrrr!

[–]Crack_smoking_hooker 29 points30 points ago

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Sister Catherine was asking all the Catholic school children in fourth grade what they want to be when they grow up.

Little Sheila said, "When I grow up, I want to be a prostitute!"

Sister Catherine's eyes grow wide and she barked, "What did you say?!"

"A prostitute!" Sheila exclaimed.

Sister Catherine breathed a sight of relief and said "Whew! Thank God! I thought you said 'A Protestant'!"

[–]toxicFork 8 points9 points ago

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I don't get it, where's the pirate reference?

[–]ninjasan11 4 points5 points ago

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catholics are pirates, true fact

[–]411eli 0 points1 point ago

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You mean butt pirates.

[–]LettersFromTheSky -5 points-4 points ago

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So I guess there is no room for Protestant prostitutes in Catholicism eh? lol.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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TinEye

It's not only for porn. _~

[–]heylookoverthere 6 points7 points ago

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Why don't you go back to your home on karma whore island?

[–]jacobo[S] 14 points15 points ago

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Because i don't have an upboat!

[–]vincent21212 2 points3 points ago

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AAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!

[–]sonicmerlin 1 point2 points ago

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I judge thee worthy.

[–]pigvwu 0 points1 point ago

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In the future if you don't know the source of an image, try tineye.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Meh, the artist should have put a credit on there.

[–]F0REM4N 3 points4 points ago

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His name is A. Dick

[–]callumgare 1 point2 points ago

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And the creator is a redditor http://abstrusegoose.com/357

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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It's all your fault now
Will forever be known as
Bee who cried "Pollen"

[–]kromak 0 points1 point ago

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I am now hooked to another comic site.

Thank you very much!!! /s

[–]rmxz 25 points26 points ago

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It's even funnier because it's true.

"Less than two feet or more than two miles" is a saying in beekeeping describing how far you can move a hive without the bees getting lost.

Move it under 2 feet -- no problem, they'll happily find their home.

Move it more than 2 miles -- no problem, they realize they're somewhere far away and re-orient themselves to their new surroundings.

But move a beehive 4 feet, and they'll go WTF just like in the cartoon; and either sit on the ground where the beehive was, or fly to a nearby branch and look around for a while.

[–]famebrella 1 point2 points ago

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I came here to find a beekeeper telling about how hes done this...reddit does not disappoint.

[–]jamesallen74 57 points58 points ago

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It's funny and all, until the others kill him.

[–]nastylittleman 49 points50 points ago

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I read about an experiment that showed that bees will kill a drone that provides false information about a food source.

[–]phlogistontheory 25 points26 points ago

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You're probably thinking of workers, as drones are male bees. Drones don't work, all they do is inseminate eggs then get kicked out of the hive to starve to death.

On a related note, here is a documentary clip about bees killing a worker who returned to the hive drunk.

[–]lizard450 4 points5 points ago

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that's awesome. Aren't the bees killing the bee because they think he/she is sick?

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

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Oh god that is horrible ~.~

[–]happyscrappy 4 points5 points ago

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I'd like to see that in a Robert Rodriguez movie.

"It's natural justice, bee style!"

[–]ricktard 0 points1 point ago

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Those bee closeups are going to give me so many nightmares

[–]nastylittleman 0 points1 point ago

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Thanks for the clarification. I now feel well versed in the details of bee-on-bee violence.

[–]phlogistontheory 1 point2 points ago

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Don't feel bad, on the subject of drones, Starcraft lies to everyone.

[–]Irrelephant- 7 points8 points ago

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Elephants can communicate over long distances by producing and receiving low-frequency sound (infrasound), a sub-sonic rumbling, which can travel in the air and through the ground much farther than higher frequencies. These calls range in frequency from 15–35 Hz and can be as loud as 117 dB, allowing communication for many kilometres, with a possible maximum range of around 10 km. This sound can be felt by the sensitive skin of an elephant's feet and trunk, which pick up the resonant vibrations much as the flat skin on the head of a drum.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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This kills the bee.

[–]ErikRThomas 5 points6 points ago

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Then it's HILARIOUS!

[–]the_silent_redditor 0 points1 point ago

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It's all fun and games until the GIANT BEE KILLING HORNETS TURN UP

[–]Juggernath 1 point2 points ago

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Any one else wonder when they'll get bored of killing bees and turn their attention on us humans, knowing full well how terrifying they are to us?

On another note to you, the_silent_redditor, you'll enjoy this National Geographic video about the bees fighting back against said giant bee killing hornets.

[–]SneakyTurtle 0 points1 point ago

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The ways of the hive mind truly is amazing. The complete disregard for the individual to conserve the hive is astonishing. If we look at the world in terms of numbers, I believe the insects have won by a fair number.

[–]the_silent_redditor 0 points1 point ago

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I did very much enjoy that, thank you :) I got stuck in a rut of watching video after video on the Nat Geo site. Now I'm late for something. No regrets, sir.

[–]poeta_aburrido -1 points0 points ago

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Roasting the messenger I see.

[–]kyrodes -1 points0 points ago

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or he loose your job

[–]TheCannon 56 points57 points ago*

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Shunned by her peer group and a laughing stock to her entire hive, Ms Bee slowly spirals into a world of alcoholism and drug abuse.

Found one day belly-up next to an empty bottle of sleeping pills, there is a message scratched into her end table where the empty bottle sits:

It was right FUCKING there!

[–]Croisan 9 points10 points ago

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I'll start working on the screenplay. You sell the movie rights.

Cast Drew Barrymore as Ms. Bee. Could resurrect her career.

[–]bobbyross 1 point2 points ago

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Congrats

[–]docgravel 0 points1 point ago

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Seinfeld will fund it.

[–]therealDrNick 0 points1 point ago

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It is known

[–]CitizenPremier 1 point2 points ago

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I saw a video on animals doing drugs that showed bees being kicked out of the hive or having their legs bit off for being drunk.

Abtruse Goose is murdering bees, I tell you...

[–]Thricey 3 points4 points ago

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I think your name should be The canon instead.

[–]pbaydari 18 points19 points ago

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Bees have it rough enough these days without getting trolled.

[–]leandroc76 -2 points-1 points ago

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[–]Kornstalx 8 points9 points ago

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I once sprayed a mosquito with mosquito repellent.

Now he'll never have any friends.

[–]outyourmother 38 points39 points ago

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Why do you have to bee like that?

[–]I_fucking_hate_puns 5 points6 points ago

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So.. much... hatred.

[–]outyourmother -1 points0 points ago

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Well this thread should be called "How to troll somebody with the screen name I_fucking_hate_puns"

[–]spigeddie 28 points29 points ago

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Stop it, hive had enough already.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points ago*

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Don't be pollen that, shit on me.

[–]diced_turnips 20 points21 points ago

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Honey, you didn't need that comma.

[–]freeload 13 points14 points ago

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Oh beehive!

[–]foiegrastyle 7 points8 points ago

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You guys need to stop bumbling around and get to the point.

[–]Aww_Shucks 2 points3 points ago

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All you guys do is drone on and on with boring bee puns. Where's the enthusiasm?

[–]FattyAcidTrip 4 points5 points ago

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Seriously I don't see what all the buzz is about.

[–]ocbound 2 points3 points ago

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i know, its unbeelievable

[–]SisterPhister 1 point2 points ago

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OP, you bee trollin'.

[–]Tuhulu -1 points0 points ago

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You see, the poor bee got embarrased. It sure must have felt like a sting.

[–]poor_pawn -1 points0 points ago

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That stung, beetch.

[–]jenkren -4 points-3 points ago

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Albus Dumbledor!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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He does if he wants to make that uncomfortable defecation request.

[–]idi0tf0wl 0 points1 point ago

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Takes shit on you

[–]Danorexic 1 point2 points ago

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This thread is starting to sting

[–]MagicSchoolBusKid -3 points-2 points ago

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I guess I should just wing it from now on.

[–]elvisliveson 1 point2 points ago

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How to troll reddit

ftfy

[–]Spatulamarama 10 points11 points ago

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Only female bees gather nectar.

[–]Virtblue 0 points1 point ago

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are they really female if they cant produce offspring.

[–]topherclay 4 points5 points ago

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You've caused many barren women to silently tear up with this comment.

[–]XRotNRollX 2 points3 points ago

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i think, genetically, they are female

[–]cgKush 2 points3 points ago

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Dwight Shrute?

[–]blu3ninja 5 points6 points ago

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Worker bees are actually female. All the males do is mate with the queen, then immediately die.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

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What a life!

[–]Kornstalx 0 points1 point ago

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Forever a drone.

[–]CloudOfEiderDown 5 points6 points ago

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This is a repost but it will be upvoted like hell because it has crossed a particular threshold that nobody remembers this joke.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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OH GOD, WHY DO YOU ALLOW SUCH GRAVE INJUSTICES TO FALL UPON YOUR PEOPLE?!?

[–]RedSquaree 1 point2 points ago

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How to troll a Bee a troll a Bee a troll a be a troll

[–]thatguy6669 1 point2 points ago

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I now know the cause of colony collapse disorder.

[–]tututitlookslikerain 1 point2 points ago

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Pretty sure this is the original bee troll.

[–]EmeraldGirl 2 points3 points ago

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I like that they had the waggle dance diagrammed.

[–]ThatsNotTrolling 2 points3 points ago

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That's not trolling.

[–]Eldorath 0 points1 point ago

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It actually takes several bees to discover the same food source and report back to the hive before the rest of the workers are convinced enough to begin foraging. Almost like a "quorum sensing" phenomenon.

Sorry: How to troll a comic about trolling

[–]potatodavid 1 point2 points ago

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male bee's dont gather pollen

[–]JerkingOffToKarma 1 point2 points ago

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The hivemind will love this!

[–]burgalay 1 point2 points ago

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Can we all agree to use the term "troll" more sparingly/accurately?

[–]rmxz 0 points1 point ago

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As in "a generally negative synonym for jötunn"?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Troll

[–]paraedolia 1 point2 points ago

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But before he returns ... When the bee returns with all his friends, he's all like WTF ...

All bees you see are female. The males stay in the hive and do nothing but boink the queen. (They're haplodiploid, same as ants and wasps, with unfertilised eggs developing as males, who then do the fertilising to produce diploid females).

[–]Casual_Lurker1 2 points3 points ago

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Repost obviously, been a while since I've seen this one on Reddit again.

[–]uzi1080 0 points1 point ago

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BEES?!

[–]tondo22 0 points1 point ago

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OP is why honey bees are going extinct.

[–]VGChampion 0 points1 point ago

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I think it'd be more funny if it was called "How to embarrass a bee".

[–]Khanstant 0 points1 point ago

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I think in reality the bees would still be able to find the wagon if it was still nearby.

[–]Decatur 0 points1 point ago

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How to troll a troll.

[–]donte69 0 points1 point ago

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You have single handedly destroyed humanity ...

[–]00bet 0 points1 point ago

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you didn't get to the part where this little bee's been tortured slowly to death back at the bee hive.

[–]HerrVonStrahlen 0 points1 point ago

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My best friends used to do this to me when I wanted to join them in playing outside. :(

[–]WarRedditor 0 points1 point ago

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it's all fun and play until the bees swarm find you behind the bush

[–]LXicon 0 points1 point ago

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bees will refuse to believe a waggle dance that points to the middle of a lake but they will respond to one that points to the opposite side of a lake. that's pretty smart.

[–]OneCanOnlyGuess 0 points1 point ago

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I read this in Mitch Hedberg's voice.

[–]h4ck3rpunk 0 points1 point ago

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Bees get punished by having their legs eaten off. Asshole.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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This is the reason why international bee populations are on a huge decline lately.

[–]OGB 0 points1 point ago

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I was waiting for the part when he jumped out of the bushes and soaked the bees with the garden hose.

[–]f0ster 0 points1 point ago

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much better way to troll a bee: 1) catch bee 2) put bee in freezer 3) take out before dead, but too cold to move 4) tie string to bee 5) hold on to string and let bee fly around in a circle on the end of it 6) laugh

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Alternative: Replace them with fake fabric flowers. No one will ever take that bee seriously again.

[–]aradil 0 points1 point ago

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No, this is trolling a bee.

tl;dr; Catch bee. Put it in freezer and tie a string to it. Bee is now on a leash.

[–]clouds31 0 points1 point ago

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You bee trollin'.

[–]waffleninja 0 points1 point ago

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How to repost a karmawhore.

[–]kazuya246 0 points1 point ago

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hahahaha saw it before but it's really pointless to do such a thing to a bee leave the bees loot the pollen and they will disappear after 1-2 hours of waiting avoid to kill them

[–]internet-arbiter 0 points1 point ago

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Then the bees decide to either:

A. Africanize and kill all humans

B. Refuse to pollinate the world and watch us all die.

[–]ashabot 0 points1 point ago

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Down voted. I hate mean-spirited things like this.

[–]denjin 0 points1 point ago

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Her

ftfy

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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The hive cluster is under atta.....er....wtf??? Where is the hive cluster?!?!?!

[–]cwo 0 points1 point ago

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Bees are too busy for this shit. Stop it and get back to work.

[–]IIoWoII 0 points1 point ago

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QI quiz is fun, eh?

[–]Nr_Of_TinEye_Hits 0 points1 point ago

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17

[–]sheldonjp 0 points1 point ago

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I just hit bees with the weed-whacker.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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I will laugh when you do that again and the bees check behind the bush.

[–]meatbeezzz 0 points1 point ago

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Another bee troll is to knock two of them unconscious (put 'em in a freezer for a few minutes), ties them together, then wait for the ensuing bee battle after they regain consciousness.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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As someone who's terrified of bees, this made me really happy.

[–]IDownvoteOverposters 0 points1 point ago

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DOWNVOTED AGAIN

[–]braomius 0 points1 point ago

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[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

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REPOST OF REPOST FUCK OFF

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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I've never seen it before. I enjoyed it thank you very much.

Downvote if you don't like it.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points ago

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[–]R3allybored 0 points1 point ago

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Old, but thanks for letting me find this again.

[–]smangitgurl 0 points1 point ago

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nigga stole my flowers

[–]wedding_speech 0 points1 point ago

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/taps glass

Attention everybody, just wanted to quickly mention that the flower girl has been rushed to hospital by her mother after playing games with a nearby bee hive. For those that would like to be the stand-in, tryouts will be held in the parking lot in 15 minutes. Thank you for your time.

[–]harglefla 0 points1 point ago

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All I can really say to this is, why are there government officials sitting in a library?

[–]guyal 0 points1 point ago

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[–]adrianthegreat 0 points1 point ago

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anyone ever troll it even better? like catching it in a bottle.. freezing it for 10 minutes.. tie a knot with floss = pet bee 10 minutes later when it awakes :)

[–]XRustyAssassinX -4 points-3 points ago

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WHY DOES IT GET UPVOTES??????????? ITS A REPOSTS FFFFUUUUUUU

[–]kneb -1 points0 points ago

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Fun fact: Bees have two types of dances: one conveys direction and approximate distance, the other says nectar is nearby, go find it yourself!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Cool, that is a fun fact.

[–]NammerDuong -1 points0 points ago

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but the bees help your flowers..

[–]dx30 -1 points0 points ago

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implying the bee wont take advantage of pheromones and sense the wagon that is 5 feet away behind a fucking bush

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

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[–]snottlebocket -1 points0 points ago

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[–]waterdude125 -4 points-3 points ago

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That's SO OLDDD...

[–]dhavalhirdhav -5 points-4 points ago

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and then bee will troll you when u sleeping.. by humming from ur one ear to the other.

[–]Worlds_Worst_Handjob 2 points3 points ago

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I hate half-assed sentences. Clearly you're just a lazy typer.

[–]superjimmyplus -2 points-1 points ago

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Why does this feel like Jack Handey? lol

[–]toaster13 0 points1 point ago

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That's the voice I read it in, actually. I was wondering where the fuck that came from.

[–]NoozeHound -2 points-1 points ago

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Rest of world were thinking 'who the fuck is Jack Handey'.

[–]wdr1 -1 points0 points ago

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I hate bees, so I love this.

[–]JohnStamosBRAH[!] -1 points0 points ago

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Why wouldnt you just post the link to the artist's web site instead of ripping it off to imgur?

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]JohnStamosBRAH[!] 0 points1 point ago

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Its reddit, theres no explanation for anything here.

[–]ThickStick -1 points0 points ago

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I am going to try this on my day off.. hope it works. If not, whatever dude.

[–]Afteraffex -1 points0 points ago

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I think I found the cause of CCD

[–]dghughes -1 points0 points ago

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There are people who keep bees and put the hives in fields so the bees pollinate the crop then pack them up and go to another field.

[–]pseudocaveman -1 points0 points ago

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That fucker stole my wagon.

[–][deleted] -4 points-3 points ago

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This probably doesn't work as well now that all the bees have bee AIDS

[–]hrodvi -2 points-1 points ago

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[–]Sam-I-Am-Not -2 points-1 points ago

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This wouldn't actually work. Bees dance until they are exhausted, so if there is no food there, the bees will stop dancing sooner and none will come.

[–]meebs86 -2 points-1 points ago

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Maybe the bees would still be able to smell the flowers if they are still in the general area?

[–]chronicdr2000 -2 points-1 points ago

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and this is why the bee is slowly becoming extinct, they are dying of embarrassment! :(

[–][deleted] -3 points-2 points ago

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Who has the time to sit through and read that entire comic? Not I.

[–]tooolongdidnotread -3 points-2 points ago

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