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top 200 commentsshow all 478

[–]ajresch 317 points318 points ago

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This would be mine:

Bees!

[–]TTrav 120 points121 points ago

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[–]feureau 2 points3 points ago

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That is absolutely my favorite oprah GIF. And I mean completely, utterly, perfectly, absolutely my favorite.

[–]Titanomachy 2 points3 points ago

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Would you say you... LOVE that Oprah GIF?

[–]feureau 3 points4 points ago

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whoawhoawhoawhoa now here, boy. Hold your horses!

It's actually illegal to put love and Oprah in the same sentence except when telling other people about the illegality of said action.

[–]duxless 57 points58 points ago

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BEADS?!

[–]stardonis 11 points12 points ago

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I don't think Gobs on board.

Bzzzz

[–]LupineChemist 15 points16 points ago

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We'll see who's business brings in the most honey!

[–]Vindexus 19 points20 points ago

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whose

[–]laughingGirls 2 points3 points ago

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whoms

[–]GravityOfSituation 7 points8 points ago

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[–]unnecessary_sarcasm 19 points20 points ago

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Oh yeah, you totally seem like the type.

[–]zulubanshee 2 points3 points ago

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What is the actual footage from? I don't really keep on Oprah news.

[–]ZombieSociety 10 points11 points ago

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Oprah show.

[–]Rabid_Weasle 1 point2 points ago

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Conan, I'm pretty sure when he was doing The Tonight Show.

[–]illuminatedwax 3 points4 points ago

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You should know this is a Conan skit

[–]evixir 1 point2 points ago

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I hate bees, but I have loved this gif ever since I saw it.

[–]d0gf0rt 133 points134 points ago

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I see your Chuck Norris and raise a Ramarajan

[–]randomsnark 93 points94 points ago

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[–]ClownsAteMyBaby 17 points18 points ago

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What the hell did I just watch? Because I want more!

[–]NickGe 33 points34 points ago

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[–]outnumber 75 points76 points ago

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Every animal was harmed in the making of this movie.

[–]vulgary 1 point2 points ago

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Hmm, a few broken horse necks I guess.

[–]gormhornbori 1 point2 points ago

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No cows harmed, so there is no problem.

[–]kbuis 20 points21 points ago

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[–]Nemethyst 16 points17 points ago

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I see your clip, and raise you...

(I don't know why its dubbed in Russian.)

[–]deaft 2 points3 points ago

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This is the greatest thing ever

[–]bozleh 10 points11 points ago

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I like how in the last few seconds of that clip, all the cars he's riding past just start exploding for absolutely no reason.

[–]bradsh 6 points7 points ago

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oh wow, real, non-cgi stunts! hollywood could learn a thing or two

[–]drank2much 7 points8 points ago

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I dunno man... those horses looked like they got pretty fucked up.

[–]TheKingofLiars 2 points3 points ago

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I'm really curious about this now. Like, can horses... bend... like that?

Edit: And poor horses :/

[–]bradsh 1 point2 points ago

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Yes that's exactly what I meant: Hollywood should fuck up more horses. Glad you picked up on that, it really was buried in subtext.

[–]munchybot 2 points3 points ago

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http://soundcloud.com/munchybot/ramarajan

I just made this stupid thing using samples from that video.

[–]darthweder 1 point2 points ago

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That looks exactly like Neil Degrasse Tyson

[–]woome 1 point2 points ago

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Who keeps setting up ramps for the cars to jump?!

[–]Brent2828 3 points4 points ago

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The movie is called Alluda Majaka.

[–]MandrakeQ 7 points8 points ago

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What a wonderful phrase?

[–]4InchesOfury 19 points20 points ago

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Thank you for not making a new post about this

[–]zaferk 1 point2 points ago

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Bollywood is more ridiculous than Hollywood sometimes.

[–]Doomfield 22 points23 points ago

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Bollywood is more ridiculous than Hollywood all the time.

FTFY

[–]kahotha 1 point2 points ago

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Do I spy a tamil movie?

[–]U731lvr 69 points70 points ago

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What a wimpy toss.

Tom Berenger did it much better

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-H8o274oVw&feature=player_detailpage#t=52s

[–]epieikeia 38 points39 points ago

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I never knew a crumpled piece of paper could be so devastating.

[–]HunterTV 42 points43 points ago

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It's not for nothing that it beats rock.

[–]Brownt0wn_ 14 points15 points ago

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It is a coke can. You can even hear the metallic noise.

[–]epieikeia 1 point2 points ago

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TIL not to watch scenes with the sound off, even when they're in French.

[–]BubbaJimbo 21 points22 points ago

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As a public school teacher, this is the only teacher movie I actually enjoy.

[–]peepluvr 2 points3 points ago

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The Principal with Jim Belushi? Lean On Me with Morgan Freeman? (they taught a little in them)

[–]VowelMovement 1 point2 points ago

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Not Stand and Deliver with Edward James Olmos!?

[–]MimoSkater 9 points10 points ago

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English version, but lower video quality: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3rDokiFU9w&feature=related&t=55s

[–]deterrence 3 points4 points ago

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I don't understand a word of it, but I love the French dub! And the trance music at the end!

[–]Religious_Guy 1 point2 points ago

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I hope someone re dubs this with Berenger speaking Spanish and the Latino kid doing the original English.

[–]ciaran036 4 points5 points ago

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I love where this ends by breaking into trance music...

[–]kbuis 2 points3 points ago

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I misread that as Tom Bergeron. Made for a much crazier scene.

[–]mediapl0y 181 points182 points ago

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Bruce Lee killed Chuck Norris.

[–]Elthan 135 points136 points ago

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I thought that was Gandalf the Grey, Gandalf the White, Monty Python and the Holy Grail's Black Knight, Benito Mussolini, The Blue Meanie, Cowboy Curtis, Jambi the Genie, Robocop, the Terminator, Captain Kirk, Darth Vader, Lo Pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger, Bill S. Preston, Theodore Logan, Spock, The Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan.

[–]saucypants 12 points13 points ago

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Read this thrice, it got catchier each time

[–]g2petter 21 points22 points ago

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If you haven't seen it, check out The Ultimate Showdown!

[–]rayne117 8 points9 points ago

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If you haven't seen it, don't check out The Ultimate Orgy!

[–]V2Blast 1 point2 points ago

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D:

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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This one's even better!

The Ultimate Orgy of Homosexuality

[–]lasagnarodeo 9 points10 points ago

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I... I'm done with the internet today.

[–]Arminas 1 point2 points ago

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No. They only kicked him in his cowboy ass.

[–]frznpzza4dinnragain 15 points16 points ago

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I thought Bill Brasky killed Chuck Norris.

[–]candyapplerapture 16 points17 points ago

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He'll eat a homeless person if you dare him.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points ago

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To Bill Brasky!

[–]aSalesman 12 points13 points ago

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Did I ever tell you about the time Brasky took me out to go get a drink with him?

We go off looking for a bar and we can't find one. Finally Brasky takes me to a vacant lot and says, 'Here we are!' We sat there for a year and a half and sure enough someone constructs a bar around us!

The day they opened we ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. Brasky yelled over the roar of the flames, 'Always leave things the way you found em!'

[–]mofoshorepatrol 2 points3 points ago

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All the Yes album covers are Brasky family photos.

[–]TheLochNessMonster 7 points8 points ago

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Bill Brasky is a son of a bitch.

[–]AngryScientist 12 points13 points ago

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He taught me how to love a woman...and how to scold a child.

[–]BDaught 10 points11 points ago

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I once saw him scissor kick Angela Lansberry.

[–]Pravusmentis 5 points6 points ago

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Bruce Lee's parents changed his last name to Lee as to avoid a supposed curse which targets males in their family.

[–]blackfox026 8 points9 points ago

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good thing he dodged that bullet

[–]Horatio_Hornblower 1 point2 points ago

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Hmm... didn't seem to work.

[–]athermis 5 points6 points ago

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Most expensive special effect ever in the history of movie making.

[–]laksefar41 154 points155 points ago

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Funny, but this remains to be my favorite http://h6img.com/p/4/big-bouncy-boobs.gif

[–]Eye_of_Terror 26 points27 points ago

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Gonna need a source. For science.

[–]Purp 50 points51 points ago

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[–]ElBrad 19 points20 points ago

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I'll be in my bunk.

[–]TheRnegade 1 point2 points ago

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The hero of Canton the man they call Jayne

[–]lakesObacon 1 point2 points ago

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Now here is what separates heroes From common folk like you and I The man they call Jayne He turned 'round his plane And let that money hit sky

[–]idiotswilldownvoteme 3 points4 points ago

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yeah, I'm saving this.

[–]jcos444 4 points5 points ago

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This comment should make this easy to find.

[–]relic120 1 point2 points ago

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Why would you need to find this again? ohhhhh....

[–]Soapeh 33 points34 points ago

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Shay Laren

[–]Eye_of_Terror 42 points43 points ago

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TO THE MAN CAVE!

[–]zaferk 17 points18 points ago

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ok, I'm back.

[–]RidiculouslyLongName 8 points9 points ago

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Only ten minutes? You sure were in a rush.

[–]Eye_of_Terror 16 points17 points ago

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Can you get me Gatorade and some energy bars? I'm gonna be in here for a while.

[–]aoeu00 2 points3 points ago

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alone?

[–]Eye_of_Terror 3 points4 points ago

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Nope, with friends. Doesn't everyone socialize while they fap?

[–]antitrop 35 points36 points ago

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I found that remarkably easy to masturbate to.

[–]legodt 34 points35 points ago

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I found that joke remarkably easy to abuse.

[–]jjason82 4 points5 points ago

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This gif has been in my wank tank for years and I never tire of it.

[–]sgt_shizzles 1 point2 points ago

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wank tank

You deserve some kind of honorable mention just for introducing that phrase.

[–]velodrama 12 points13 points ago

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I was looking up pictures of her and came across this.
http://i.imgur.com/VTDoh.jpg At first I thought she had a monstrous and terrifying camel toe.

[–]dnlprkns 23 points24 points ago

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NSFW

[–]velodrama 1 point2 points ago

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My apologies for not tagging this as NSFW everyone

[–]ggk1 1 point2 points ago

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yeah, I was really surprised when a picture of a porn star that mentions monstrous camel toe was NSFW. Shoulda warned me

[–]aoeu00 11 points12 points ago

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^ NSFW btw.. but who works on the weekend!

[–]rILEYcAPSlOCK 4 points5 points ago

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/okay

[–]tushibu 1 point2 points ago

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Millions of years of evolution have lead to this one single erection, and I am grateful for every second after having clicked this link.

[–]AxlRead 5 points6 points ago

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thats alotta milk http://i.imgur.com/wM99d.gif

[–]zaferk 28 points29 points ago

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wat ಠ_ಠ

[–]tHeSiD 6 points7 points ago

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hahaha, thats from The Hangover movie.

[–]link3988 7 points8 points ago

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Not at the table, Carlos.

[–]thavi 40 points41 points ago

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[–]SeanLOSL 28 points29 points ago

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Always admired that comical tail flop... perfectly timed.

[–]Znof 1 point2 points ago

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Can't

Stop

Watching

[–]DireBaboon 22 points23 points ago*

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Walker told me I have AIDS

edit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pdsTUcuD7YA

[–]jumpyg1258 1 point2 points ago

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Gah you now made me miss this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJ5w4MkFofc

[–]rxgator 14 points15 points ago

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Yeah,

for me its the owls, yes the owls

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

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Dude, what the fuck!? I never knew owls were so fucking terrifying. This is a production of nightmares.

[–]taylorson 4 points5 points ago

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[–]RepostJesus 17 points18 points ago

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[–]rolmos 9 points10 points ago

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[–]V2Blast 1 point2 points ago

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wat

[–]Eye_of_Terror 1 point2 points ago

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Eerily apt considering how Religious Chuck is. O_o

[–]omgimonfire 566 points567 points ago

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[–]Swinly 54 points55 points ago

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"You may ask, 'Is it legal?'"

That's always a good sign.

[–]pandemic1444 1 point2 points ago

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"You may ask, 'Is it right'? We like to think so."

[–]funcrusherplus 45 points46 points ago

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Not to mention that chuck norris facts are just a rip off of an old site that had Vin diesel facts

[–]TheLochNessMonster 16 points17 points ago

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I try to tell people this, but no one ever believes me.

[–]Jerakeen 3 points4 points ago

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If you were Vin Diesel they would believe you, or else.

[–]GodShapedBullet 21 points22 points ago

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Vin Diesel is the true hero.

[–]SexuallyTransmitted 3 points4 points ago

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Aren't Vin Diesel facts a rip off of Mr. T facts?

[–]P_26 8 points9 points ago

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"Our forefathers-"

Nope.

[–]rolmos 1 point2 points ago

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zero on the final.

[–]Rawlsdeep 198 points199 points ago

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Wow, fuck Chuck Norris for this.

[–]ffualo 82 points83 points ago

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There used to be a website called fuck norris facts. One of my favorites that I remember: "Chuck Norris once sucked dick for cab fair, then walked home."

[–]PlumberODeth 31 points32 points ago

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Ok, seriously, citation needed. If only 'cause it would be funny. I mean, I've never been to a cab fair, maybe its worth sucking dick to go see!

[–]LightIytoasted 19 points20 points ago

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You've never been to a cab fair?! You're missing out! The curry flavored cotton candy is amazing. And don't get me started on Cabbie Capers 2

[–]PlumberODeth 1 point2 points ago

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Curry flavored cotton candy is not worth knob shlobbin', even if Chuck Norris did it first.

[–]BearBryant 1 point2 points ago

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Sounds like a porn flick.

[–]pitasoup 1 point2 points ago

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[–]FLarsen 2 points3 points ago

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[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

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This is a good example of the Internet not knowing the difference between a ass hole And a bad ass. (I personally would like to see mr t. Take the place of chuck Norris in Internet culture.)

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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The internet would look a lot like it did around 1999-2000 ish. Here you go. You're welcome. ( There will be dead links. It's from ancient internet history.)

[–]ron3090 32 points33 points ago

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As a christian: "Oh boy, another one of these threads."

After watching vid: "Oh wow."

Although he may have good intentions, above all I want separation of church and state. I don't care about fundamentalist groups being crazy-go-nuts nearly as much as when they demand the same of everyone by manipulating the government. Religion needs to be the choice of the individual, not forced on them.

[–]SushiGummy 145 points146 points ago

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Can I just say that I do not give the least bit of a fuck what Chuck Norris believes? The gif is hilarious, and Chuck Norris jokes (besides the five same ones people continuously quote) are funny. I don't give a heaping shit if he kicks babies or eats puppies, it's not like anybody actually believes that Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door. I like Chuck Norris jokes for what they are: jokes.

Personally, I'm tired of going into every comment thread that has absolutely anything to do with Chuck Norris and seeing "GUYS BUT WAIT CHUCK NORRIS IS AN ASSHOLE SO LET'S DISMISS THIS PERFECTLY FUNNY JOKE" bullshit at the top. Chuck Norris was in a Mountain Dew commercial where he unrealistically chases after a couple teenagers, and it was funny.

Yes, Chuck Norris is crazy. Yes, Chuck Norris is an asshole. That's no reason to change or hate on the jokes. You could tell my dad the exact same joke twice, one making fun of Bush and another making fun of Obama, and he'll only find the one that makes fun of Obama funny, despite the fact that the punchlines are the same. Don't sink to his level.

[–]just_quit_smoking 12 points13 points ago

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It's as if before finding out he is an extremist Christian everyone actually thought he was FUCKING AWESOME and therefore worthy of being mocked. I have always thought he was an epic fuck-cake which is why the jokes are funny.

So did all you people actually think he was awesome before this came out and now feel betrayed or what??? Because America, Fuck Yeah?

He's a dork who sold stretch-crotch jeans out of third-rate magazines so you too can look gay while high kicking people in the face. Was that ever cool?

I'm high.

[–]LoveGoblin 2 points3 points ago

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So did all you people actually think he was awesome before this came out and now feel betrayed or what???

To an extent, yeah. As you say, he ended up in a lot of infomercials and the like, but he was definitely a legit fighter in his day.

[–]surfnaked 1 point2 points ago

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He was that. I saw him win his first championship and he was the real deal.

[–]TrustiestMuffin 11 points12 points ago

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I picture Kanye West and Mike Meyers with Kanye suddenly blurting out, "Chuck Norris hates gay people"

[–]magister0 15 points16 points ago

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We know. We all know. It's a fucking GIF. Calm down.

[–]clanksy 3 points4 points ago

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This. It's a hilarious GIF. Can't we just laugh together?

[–]YesShitSherlock 11 points12 points ago

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Alleged Chuck Norris Fact: "Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer. Too bad he never cries. Ever."

Chuck Norris's Response: There was a man whose tears could cure cancer or any other disease, including the real cause of all diseases – sin. His blood did. His name was Jesus, not Chuck Norris.

http://www.wnd.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=52567#ixzz1NmVJ0hzd

[–]rILEYcAPSlOCK 19 points20 points ago

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Chuck Norris is so badass he can singlehandedly take all the steam out of a stupid meme about him.

[–]MaoThatHurt 2 points3 points ago

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Chuck Norris is so badass he can make redditors click a link to World Net Daily.

[–]BetaRhoOmega 1 point2 points ago

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There are few things in this world that drive me to really dislike someone and one of them is neglecting the large amount of evidence for evolution without providing a logical reason.

[–]pillage 19 points20 points ago

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Ed Asner thinks 9/11 was an inside job does this mean I shouldn't enjoy Up?

[–]OldTimeGentleman 7 points8 points ago

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There is no good reason in the entire universe not to enjoy up. If the movie was made out of burnt flesh of poor children I'd still enjoy it.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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TIL

[–]Jerakeen 2 points3 points ago

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Ed Asner isn't using his celebrity and his belief about 9/11 to try to trample on the rights of a minority and destroy one of the most important parts of the constitution.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points ago

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As a Canadian who at least knows the basics of American History; all I can say is WHAT-THE-FUCK?!

[–]q_3 1 point2 points ago

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[–]just_quit_smoking 1 point2 points ago

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Well to be fair, a bible-thumping toolbag can still teach drafting or something. As a christian I completely agree with the poster of that video - public school is not a place to discuss things like this (not to mention the obvious bias) unless it's a religious studies class or something where many religions are discussed and analyzed from a third party perspective.

It pisses me off when people I believe to be sensible, if not wise, back this sort of bullshit. If someone truly believes in whatever you'd think they wouldn't be intimidated by other views? Afterall - are you looking for truth or are you just backing the home team? Seek and question, that's the path to God(lessness).

I'm high.

[–]staplerdude 1 point2 points ago

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Wow, Chuck Norris has a political view different from mine! What and asshole.

[–]clanksy 4 points5 points ago

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He's such a scumbag he's a philanthropist

[–]DevinTheGrand 7 points8 points ago

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People can believe shit that is bad and still be good people. Condemning someone completely over a single viewpoint is extremely short sighted.

[–]pitchpipe 8 points9 points ago

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People can believe shit that is bad and still be good people.

True, but when people go from believing shit that is bad to wanting to force that bad shit on the rest of us they go from being "good people" to being "bad people".

[–]DevinTheGrand 7 points8 points ago

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No, they think that that stuff will make everyone happier. They aren't bad people, they're misguided people.

[–]Melmo 8 points9 points ago

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I am someone who respects most people's opinions and principles, but pitchpipe is right. While they aren't necessarily "bad people", they are being assholes. They need to realize that everyone has different opinions on life and morals and that they should be able to decide on what to believe in themselves.

[–]cptn_Belfort29 4 points5 points ago*

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"With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion"-Steven Weinberg

[–]mynewestthrowaway 3 points4 points ago

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Every Chuck Norris post, however seemingly light-hearted, is used as a pulpit. I for one find the moralizing very tiresome. Perhaps we could all just stipulate now to the fact that catching a piece of paper in an amusing fashion does not indicate anything of substance about one's character?

[–]pygmy 16 points17 points ago

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[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

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context?

[–]pygmy 7 points8 points ago

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Just some cute french singer from a couple years back

[–]FruityPeebils 2 points3 points ago

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she makes me sad that i will die alone

[–]dearastronomer 1 point2 points ago

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Ah, yes, I remember that ass VERY well.

[–]just_quit_smoking 11 points12 points ago

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This is the entire reason the .gif exists.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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Which movie is this scene (gif) from?

[–]dorkbat 7 points8 points ago

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Walker, Texas Ranger.

[–]fah1m 27 points28 points ago

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I love how he turns his face and gives the "Nigga Please" look.

[–]JIGGER_MY_DIGGER 57 points58 points ago

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RACIST

[–]fah1m 41 points42 points ago

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Digga Please.

[–]Plagiarismo 19 points20 points ago

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[–]anonemouse2010 2 points3 points ago

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[–]ayebaj 5 points6 points ago

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[–]dandello 3 points4 points ago

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someone is down voting everyone that talks shit on Chuck Norris..I want my down votes too! Chuck Norris is a: cunt, a piece of shit, a bible thumping ass hat, a creationist dim wit, an asshole who wants creationism taught in schools, He wants to lie to children and teach them misleading things, probably fucks goats (unconfirmed), and on top of all that, I think i have seen this repost about 20 times in the past few months.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points ago

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the camera slowly zooming in on the black guy made this

[–]Insidium 3 points4 points ago

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Tom Berenger did it better.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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still my least favorite redneck.

[–]gay_richter_scale 3 points4 points ago

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-6.7

[–]kevinb111 29 points30 points ago

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TIL Chuck Norris is a racist...

[–]italianice388 13 points14 points ago

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I love Chuck Norris jokes. So fresh and original.

[–]TheTempo60 2 points3 points ago

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Damn, this sarcasm is almost tangible.

[–]magister0 12 points13 points ago

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This isn't a Chuck Norris joke

[–]Enteligent 6 points7 points ago

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Chuck Norris is an asshole in real life.

[–]johnnyfatsac 7 points8 points ago

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Chuck Norris is a cunt.

[–]VengeanceIsMine 1 point2 points ago

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BLAST! IT WILL BE MINE!

[–]Kardlonoc 1 point2 points ago

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I watched a bit of walker texas ranger and its pretty amusing in all its ridiculous glory. Like how on Las Vegas all the male protagonists have been Navy Seals or marines at some point.

[–]aMANescape 1 point2 points ago

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...He died instantly

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Take that, you young African American boy!

[–]ImmaLetUFinish 1 point2 points ago

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And this would be mine. Its not the act itself I find so funny (which with the exception of this case I find reprehensible) but the person it is happening to that makes me el oh el.

[–]dearastronomer 1 point2 points ago

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did that bro just punch a chick in the face?

[–]PelicanMiracles 1 point2 points ago

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Bruce Lee is infinitely better. He actually beat Chuck's ass in "Way of the Dragon."

[–]jonwku 1 point2 points ago

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Daffy fapping. Always a laugh

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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chuck noris spits in the face of death....then round house kicks him !

[–]Lazook 5 points6 points ago

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Fuck Chuck Norris and all the fucking jokes about him.