203
204

What are those stains on the floor (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by jasonjulias

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on
all 102 comments
sorted by:
best
best
top
new
hot
controversial
old

[–][deleted] ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[deleted]

[–][deleted] 27 points28 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I'm coming!

[–]ProteinStain 25 points26 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Already there!

[–]Stregano -2 points-1 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

But I thought you were at work bro

[–]darwinface0321 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Clearly, he's on the floor.

[–]mst3kcrow 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Now it's time to do the dinosaur.

[–]sandandpomp 6 points7 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Beat me to that one.

[–]mikedsigns 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

dont jerk me around

[–]Xanthan81 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

You guys would have to blow your puns right off the bat!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Sometimes you just have to suck it up and take a chubby for the team.

[–]sandandpomp 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Penis. I mean... where does he get off?

[–]kerridge 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Onward fellow wank Charioteers!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

And a right hander at that.

[–]SmoothWD40 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

For research!

[–]LethargicLeopard 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

sounds like something professor farnsworth would say, and the picture is all too fitting. 5 internets to you sir.

[–]walrus0 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

You mean the onanismbox?

[–]skynxx 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Quick to the Beat Cave!

[–]Pink_Monkey 31 points32 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Ha! That's a pretty sweet set up. If I had a nerd cage like that, shooting loads on the floor would be the least of my worries. Perhaps a priority.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I once had a dog. His name was Stains. He was really good at following all our commands: Sit, Stains... Roll over, Stains... Come, Stains.

[–]futurecolors 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I once had a dog named Dumpster. Also very good at following commands.

[–]Pink_Monkey -5 points-4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

ha ha

Nice!

[–]orionxx 11 points12 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

"Secret Fap Cabin"

[–]DodongoDislikesSmoke 11 points12 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

You probably shouldn't bring a black-light in there.

[–]Monkey_named_donkey 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

..or a girl.

[–]Did_it_in_Flint 19 points20 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Spank tank.

[–]madman1969 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Porn Pod

[–]UnDire 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Cum Capsule

[–]bitcore 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Seminal Sanctum

[–]Torg0 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The fap shack is a little place where I can rub one out. Fap shack bayyyby.

[–]hoikarnage 8 points9 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

"Protein stains" is what the councilors at the group home I grew up in used to call them.

[–]thegoatseeker 7 points8 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Those pesky protein stains. http://youtu.be/J3Nn5tZa488

[–]CivEZ 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

"Protein Stain" my new insult.

[–]TrickyDrizzle 25 points26 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Holy shit! This is my friend's! He designed the whole thing. Those stains are probably from his son. This is a really cool box and inside is a 32" monitor. I'll let him know hes on Reddit!

[–]Edrondol 11 points12 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Okay, I'll bite.

WHY?!? Doesn't it get stuffy as hell in there? As in stifling heat? How does the computer stay cool? Doesn't he have overheating issues?

Guess I don't see why this would be better than just having it on a desk...unless it's a fapinet as others have stated.

[–]TrickyDrizzle 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Heh, both sides have their own circulation system and it's made out of particle board so it doesn't get hot. The computer is actually in its own cabinet behind the monitor. It's not a fapinet. He uses it to concentrate when he needs to code at home or when he has free time and wants to be fully immersed in his games. It sits next to his wife and son's computers and most of the time the door is open.

[–]horseyhorseyhorsey 7 points8 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

just how hard does he need to concentrate in order to ejaculate such quantities?

[–]TrickyDrizzle 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Ask "Relevant_rule34" I'm sure he'd be a better judge.

[–]relevant_rule34 7 points8 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

On average it's about a teaspoon, although I hear that keeping well-hydrated will also increase your volume.

But don't take my word for it, I'm no doctor.

[–]kafro 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

We didn't summon a doctor; we wanted an expert.

[–]sAiNt2HeLL 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The question is how does he FAP with such small space

[–]Yage2006 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

There is apparently a fetish about sex and or fapping in very constrained spaces.

Just google it :)

[–]wbeavis 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

probably from his son

Or almost his son.

[–]TrickyDrizzle 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Nah. It's particle board and the first day he had it his son spilled the whole bag of BBQ chips in there, lol.

[–]jasonjulias[S] 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

This should be at the top. I'm intrigued.

[–]TrickyDrizzle 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Not too much to know. This has been on stumbleupon and another forum before. It was funny to see his traffic on the web server spike from a couple hundred hits to just under a million. He's totally a tinker/DIY type of guy. I answered a few questions already.

[–]JdoubleE5000 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Portable 'batin' Cave.

[–]Stregano 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Go Away! 'Batin!

[–]dkim1386 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

It's cum stain guys.

[–]boot20 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I think he had a dick attack in there.

[–]Massawyrm 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Gretchen, stop trying to make dick attack happen.

[–]Geroy121 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I dub this "The Fap Station".

[–]tama_chan 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Just a guess but I believe it's the blood, sweat, tears and jizz of a hardcore gamer.

[–]kendanf 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Sick throwback Chevy astro seat.

[–]TrickyDrizzle 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

It's from a 1970's "rape van", aka club wagon I think. It's his favorite part of the box I think, haha!

[–]trollus_maximus 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

AHHH...still has that 'rape van' smell.

[–]apratsunrthd 4 points5 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Jack Shack? Cummy Cubby?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

What does that smell like?

[–]MustWarn0thers 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Chlorine, probably.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Maybe he spilled a drink you big dummy.

[–]TrickyDrizzle 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Son + BBQ Potato chips = stains.

[–]poker_face 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

That is one luxury mouse-pad.

[–]TrickyDrizzle 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

He uses the same one at work. They are actually very nice

[–]honkytonks 6 points7 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

mind your step, don't cut yourself on the carpet.

[–]Markus_Antonius 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

That's a good excuse to stay in the closet ;-P

[–]entropy111 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

that would be cool, until you fart and asphyxiate yourself.

[–]fuelter 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

fap chamber

[–]cdahlkvist 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Masturbation Station

[–]Ro-Maniac 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

nananananananana-nananananananana FAPcave!

[–]ktdidit 2 points3 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I have that same mouse pad...only mine is bigger and it's on my living room floor.

[–]Fluxbios 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

It's a fap stall. A lot of public restrooms have them.

[–]fillahbuster 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Mostly found in college dorms and military barracks.

[–]ReverendDizzle 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Christ it would be hot in there.

[–]Satanta 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Nice wankbox

[–]MrStashes 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Its jizz, ok? Now... where can I get one of these?

[–]checkurhead 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Sometimes I cry in my fortress of solitude...

[–]fart_sack 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Beat-box

[–]Flat__Line 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Behold! The FAP cupboard!

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The quick answer is splooge marks but it is more likely that they are grease stains from Funyuns.

[–]ProteinStain 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

My bad!

[–]veloBOSS 1 point2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Welcome to the throne of FAP

[–]adhdguy 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

this definition is relevant

[–]famebrella 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I imagine it looks like candle drippings

[–]dankologist 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Gross Gross Gross. Crazy part its in moms living room...Nasty

[–]wHoIsThEcOoN 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Hey i have the same keyboard

[–]bjhath 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Orgone accumulator, anyone?

Somewhere, I have a picture of William Burrough's Orgone Accumulator from his Lawrence, KS house. Now you know.

[–]imag1nat1on 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

All that still has the shittiest mouse pad ever.

[–]chillorbechilled 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I would say that isn't ejaculate, but lube.

[–]Nrvnqsr10 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Fap to the Fepic.

[–]goldandguns 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

It's a literal spank tank. OF COURSE! it's so simple, why haven't we thought of this

[–]danimal82 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

at least there's no skid marks on the chair...

[–]tuxedobean 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Mtn. Dew

[–]Ghostalker474 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Ventilation? That place has to heat up pretty quick when anything it powered on.

[–]bananinhao 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I have one similar, but I grow some plants in it

[–]LethargicLeopard 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Want this very much. Bring it to me by Monday and there's a wad of cash with your parents' names on it.

[–]masei 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

What about heat? I mean. Doesn't he get cooked inside there?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

"Franks and beans!"

[–]nodnodwinkwink 0 points1 point ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Forever alone spawning ground.

[–]unicornfarts -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

liquid nitroglycerene

[–]OfGenocide -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

[–]just_tired -1 points0 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Really? ..... Again ? And again and again? This pic is funny, but come on!

[–]raziphel -3 points-2 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

if you have to ask, I'm not going to tell you.