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all 104 comments

[–]jpartridge 26 points27 points ago

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What else should be put on her axe wound?

[–]thecosmiccat 16 points17 points ago

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This is clearly PoorlyTimedGimli doing field work.

[–]winemaster 50 points51 points ago

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TIL that girls use Pam to keep things lubricated.

[–]McDrawrHumperdink 25 points26 points ago

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But what is Pam doing outside the kitchen?

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points ago

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Yeah, and that can of cooking spray....

[–]Neilmev 2 points3 points ago

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What are girls doing outside the kitchen?

[–]big-o-notation 1 point2 points ago

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Pluggable Authentication Modules?

[–]dixonticonderoga 6 points7 points ago

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Those are gonna be some pissed off hornets.

[–]hotoatmeal 6 points7 points ago

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I wish this was a gif.

[–]decoy26517 2 points3 points ago

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[–]hotoatmeal 1 point2 points ago

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ಠ_ಠ

[–]chocothunder 7 points8 points ago

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I feel slightly ashamed for hearing the bugs from the old commercials saying: "Uh oh, RAAAAAIIID!"

[–]omst 117 points118 points ago

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that's a skin refrigerant that temporarily relieves the pain of a superficial injury or trauma. have you never ever watched or participated in a sport?

[–]behemuthm 187 points188 points ago

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This is reddit, not ESPN.

[–]takeaki 72 points73 points ago

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Yes. I have. Never heard of the stuff.

[–]RielDealJr 11 points12 points ago

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It costs a significant amount, so it is generally only seen being used on professional athletes, or those who attend a financially well off school. Also, it has really only risen in popularity in the last 10 years or so.

[–]Fa1nT 1 point2 points ago

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Is it the stuff they spray on your skin before you get a large needle into a muscle or something? That really cold spray that numbs?

[–]McBurger 4 points5 points ago

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I love solarcaine. I used to OD on the shit, just spray it all over my full body and lay there numb like i'm on some morphine rush.

It's pretty cheap at any drug store. Of course, I stopped being 15 at some point.

[–]greyscalehat 0 points1 point ago

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Word on the street was it happened when he turned 16.

[–]snottlebocket 1 point2 points ago

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Still, it's fairly common. Quicker and easier than putting ice on it when you're on the field.

[–]ilmmad 1 point2 points ago

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It's also better than ice because the temperature at which it boils is much less likely to cause skin damage.

[–]OfficerMudkip 8 points9 points ago

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If you put boiling ice on your skin, you are experiencing a whole other set of problems.

[–]ilmmad 0 points1 point ago

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Well yeah, but ice cools by melting, while the spray cools by boiling. Both processes are endothermic.

[–]blackstrat 4 points5 points ago

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What are these sports you speak of?

[–]NicestBoat 5 points6 points ago

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Maybe this will help... It's the first aid spray from Resident Evil.

[–]Oncologist 29 points30 points ago

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In my day we folded up our football helmets and put them in our back pockets and went home after the game. There was no skin refrigerant for pansies back then.

[–]MrNiko 20 points21 points ago

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Take a salt tablet.

[–]Salif 11 points12 points ago

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Rub some dirt on it and walk it off

[–]pop_my_cat_eyes_in 1 point2 points ago

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gimme that ball or I'll slice your guts out hippy

[–]SirTercel 2 points3 points ago

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And then you'd just take one of coach's go-pills...

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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they are called oxycontin, to give you oxygen and keep you from being incontinent

[–]MrNiko -1 points0 points ago

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Salt Tablet?

[–]bob-a-rama -1 points0 points ago

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I took those in high school. Something about changing muscle electrolyte balance. Helped me get over stomach cramps

[–]chronictrees 10 points11 points ago

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A sport that isn't gaming*

[–]yergi 6 points7 points ago

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You... you do realize that you're asking a bunch of geeks who spend all day on the internet reading if they have ever watched ESPN... a lot of us don't even own a TV...

[–]highguy420 0 points1 point ago

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I don't have a TV. Or watch sports.

[–]alphazero924 2 points3 points ago

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I have multiple TVs but I never watch them, or sports for that matter.

[–]highguy420 0 points1 point ago

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I actually only have monitors. I was thinking about getting a wii the other day and realized I would have to buy the component video cable, and then a component to DVI adapter for the monitor just to use it. There are 3rd party ones online that are a wii to component to vga adapter in one cable. I might get one of those.

[–]RANDOM_JESUS_FREAK 0 points1 point ago

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Same here.

[–]bitchkat -2 points-1 points ago

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I'm reading reddit and watching my third Aussie Rules match of the day. Got up at 3:45 am to watch the first one live.

[–]igrey 3 points4 points ago

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/r/sports 41k subscribers. /r/wtf 523k reders.

You do realize that you are by far in the minority here.

+1 for no TV, and by default, no sports.

[–]bitchkat -3 points-2 points ago

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I really haven't spent much time thinking about what's popular on reddit. A girl likes what she likes and I'm not embarrassed about it.

[–]thaitea 2 points3 points ago

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yeah i play counter-strike

[–]stupidlyugly 1 point2 points ago

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Pfft. I'm not kidding when I say this. I was noticing the portable bench and thinking to myself how nice it would've been to have a place to sit during volleyball games. Expensive refrigerator spray? LUXURY!

[–]RAISEStheQuestion 0 points1 point ago

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Also known as "That Magic Soccer Spray."

[–]SoonerStan -1 points0 points ago

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It's heaven in a can. It reallly is.

[–]pippy 0 points1 point ago

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Yeah, but it's funny to simply say she stinks.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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I played sports. I just never complained when I got a little cut or a fractured pelvis. Just walked it off.

[–]somafp 0 points1 point ago

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No i thought it was WD-40.

[–]ShaiTown 0 points1 point ago

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I know you're probably a guy, but I still have to ask you. Are you a girl? I only ask because your response is very girly. You see, I'm a man, and when I post comments, I sound like a man.... But you sir... You sound like a girl.

[–]omst 1 point2 points ago

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lol

[–]saintbargabar 0 points1 point ago

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So she scraped her vagina?

[–]canine_swine 4 points5 points ago

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For those of us in the UK, Ireland, New Zealand & Australia: Axe is the same as Lynx.

[–]alphazero924 -1 points0 points ago

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Really? You guys use cats over there?

[–]ooo_shiny 0 points1 point ago

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Yep, they are furry and feel better than self mutilation.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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What else would you put on an ax wound?

[–]GeneralRimjoy 12 points13 points ago

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Rug burn.

[–]AshsToAshs 2 points3 points ago

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I came here expecting a slew of 'smelly vagina' jokes. I leave impressed with reddit's decorum.

[–]cavortingwebeasties 1 point2 points ago

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I always thought skin refrigerant was for pussies.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]kral2 4 points5 points ago

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The only sports that matter are online.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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BOOM! Headshot!

[–]lleeeeeoo 7 points8 points ago

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We need more vespene gas.

[–]alphazero924 1 point2 points ago

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POOSH LITTLE KART!

[–]pseudolobster 11 points12 points ago

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I played soccer for 6 years, and I've never heard of this product. I'm not the hugest sports fan, but I do end up watching a lot on TV, and I've been to a few live events. I've absolutely never encountered this before in my life. My last roommate was a hockey player. There's a football field across the street, where a game is going on right now. If I looked out my window, I could watch the game, I often do, when I'm standing on my balcony smoking, I always watch the game. I've never seen any sprays of any sort, ever, in any sport I've ever watched or participated in.

[–]Dr_Octagonapus 7 points8 points ago

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  • played competitive football for 10 years
  • played competitive basketball for 13 years
  • played competitive baseball for 7 years
  • play competitive tennis for 6 years (still playing)

never heard of this stuff

[–]motrjay -1 points0 points ago

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Then your not very observant =)

[–]gorillazbmx6 1 point2 points ago

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This guy: feeling better about himself for being a sports product hipster.

[–]LuridTeaParty 1 point2 points ago

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RielDealJr has it sound like most people who play sports in school wouldn't come across it anyway. Is that the case?

[–]stupidlyugly 0 points1 point ago

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I played sports in the 80s when the world was still in black and white. Fancy sprays? If they existed, I didn't know of them.

[–]dirtymoney 1 point2 points ago

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"walk if off, Nancy!!!"

[–]stupidlyugly 0 points1 point ago

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Best medicine ever!

[–]alphazero924 0 points1 point ago

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You must be in a 3rd world country. The world was only black and white until the 60's for 1st world countries.

[–]stupidlyugly 0 points1 point ago

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You're right. I lied. The world was actually in bad VHS video format back then.

[–]PreExRedditor 0 points1 point ago

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ITT people with a sense of humor (minus you)

[–]TheLyinKing 5 points6 points ago

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That is actually a new product called Yeast-B-Gone®.

[–]PatAunces 16 points17 points ago

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Baby-B-Gone

[–]midareashi 1 point2 points ago

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abort-on apply directly to the fetus

[–]m4n715 1 point2 points ago

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Bad Smell + Bad Smell != Good Smell

[–]rrs1978 0 points1 point ago

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Red socks make me wanna fap

[–]Superbird42 0 points1 point ago

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More like Lynx.

[–]cavortingwebeasties 0 points1 point ago

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...and MY axe!

[–]ryanspeck 0 points1 point ago

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Only you can prevent vaginal fires.

[–]Arcon1337 -5 points-4 points ago

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Axe cans look nothing like that.

[–]bbqfap 6 points7 points ago

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This man is a connoisseur of body sprays.

[–]Mirarii -2 points-1 points ago

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When you shower once every harvest moon you get that way.

[–]sakipooh -2 points-1 points ago

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Why, and what?

[–]chronictrees 7 points8 points ago

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Cold spray, looks like a groin problem. It's like holding a can of compressed air upside down, instant icy blast.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Subduction 2 points3 points ago

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Dude, if you're not going to commit to the joke then don't bother.

[–]Stick 0 points1 point ago

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Knock kno...

[–]djpk19 -2 points-1 points ago

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Icy Hot: "icy to dull the pain; hot to relax it away"

[–]bitchkat 0 points1 point ago

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Believe me, you don't ever want to get Tiger Balm in your cooter.

[–]Lygasm -1 points0 points ago

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ha ha, raid+Asian crotch-critters=delicious