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all 97 comments

[–]Throwaway_Novelty 80 points81 points ago

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A family friend was the walrus caretaker at the seaworld here in San Diego. One of the walrus's he bottle fed as an infant, and cared for it since. I got to go behind the scenes with him to see the animals. When he approached the walrus's this one walrus fucking FLIPPED. This 1500 pound walrus was inseparable from the guy. The walrus moaned and whined until he started petting it.

Tldr: Bottle fed walruses are as loving and loyal as a dog.

[–]Frankeh 35 points36 points ago

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My new dream is to have a pet walrus.

[–]Redebo 16 points17 points ago

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Maybe you could train it to debunk common misconceptions, videotape the process and upload it to YouTube!

[–]r2mayo 0 points1 point ago

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Or just have it pick the winner of the world cup games.... PROFIT

[–]discord23 4 points5 points ago

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plural: walrus or wal·rus·es

[–]vashonite 6 points7 points ago

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Walri

[–]zaq1 12 points13 points ago

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Walripodes

[–]ajl_mo 1 point2 points ago

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[–]jutct 1 point2 points ago

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walren

[–]IbidtheWriter 0 points1 point ago

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walrice

[–]TheREALMoeSzyslak 111 points112 points ago

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That's terrible. She's obviously sensitive about her weight, and this guy thinks it's funny to squat there and taunt her with that crown of smelt.

[–]Starman_DX 14 points15 points ago

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Agreed, this is flagrant trolling. I mean look at his face.

[–]Royd 1 point2 points ago

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next thing we know, we're gonna find out he's allergic fish. What a king of trolls.

[–]ojoil 1 point2 points ago

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Hold out a tray of fish, and when she grabs some smack it out of her hand with a look of disapproval!

[–]darcee1013 53 points54 points ago

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TIL walruses have armpit hair.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]MeGusta 36 points37 points ago

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I did, and it's worth it.

[–]Dr_Bombay 23 points24 points ago

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It's like... armpit beards.

[–]BadRobot01 5 points6 points ago

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TIL walruses have camel toe's.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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Oh shit here come's an s.

[–]Shiba-Shiba 42 points43 points ago

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Did Jamie Hyneman lose his Beret?

[–]RielDealJr 8 points9 points ago

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No, it's Wilford Brimley.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Hyneman without his beret and glasses is one scary motherfucker.

[–]Stevo32792 -3 points-2 points ago

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Ctrl-F: Jamie... someone has done my job for me. Upboats for you

[–]Portablewalrus 35 points36 points ago

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:D

[–]silentl3ob 10 points11 points ago

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What exactly makes you portable?

[–]Portablewalrus 9 points10 points ago

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It's the name of my laptop. Reason? Because it's a massively powerful, and awe inspiring tool in a little package. Plus it sounds funny.

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points ago

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awe inspiring tool in a little package

I believe I heard a lady refer to that.

[–]Portablewalrus 7 points8 points ago

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Yea..... I'm kind of a big deal

[–]LordOfPies 11 points12 points ago

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i want to see her reaction when she saw them

[–]theghostofabe 7 points8 points ago

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Me too. I'm expecting walrus tears of joy.

[–]bl1ksem 9 points10 points ago

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They be stealing mah bucket!

[–]lovetape 9 points10 points ago

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[–]ajl_mo 2 points3 points ago

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After all this time and countless views, that still makes me laugh.

[–]samsf90 21 points22 points ago

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opens eyes

O_O

BEST

SURPRISE

EVER

[–]CommentsOnPostsAsArt 26 points27 points ago

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This photo comments on the roles of animals in society. The human male, fully clothed, offers a smattering of fish to an embarrassed walrus. This raises several questions.

Why is it that the walrus cannot provide for himself? Does the optimistic human hold the walrus captive? Were the fish unjustly killed?

A tragedy captured on film.

[–]Hamstadam 2 points3 points ago

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Clearly the walrus feels emasculated by needing fish handouts.

[–]daveyeah 2 points3 points ago

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THIS PICTURE HAS NO BUSINESS BEING IN 2011.

[–]jrodeo 2 points3 points ago

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I am not the walrus.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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I fucking love walruses.

[–]cloudnyne 2 points3 points ago

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Is that walrus-toe?

[–]Infinitezen 2 points3 points ago

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Goo Goo Kachoo!

[–]ffffffuuuuuuuuu 6 points7 points ago

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Voila! Repost!

[–]gmccale 2 points3 points ago

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Your username is a repost.

[–]sUPERbUTTEReXPRESS 1 point2 points ago

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SURPRISE FISH TART! best day ever.

[–]ch4os1337 1 point2 points ago

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Is it bad that I look at the walrus and all I can think is that it's using low resolution textures?

[–]LordSobi 1 point2 points ago

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no it's normal. Sometimes I look at some shiny stuff in real life and I can't help but think that is a bad use of a blinn.

[–]facestab 1 point2 points ago

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Too shiny, not enough ambient

[–]buggereet 0 points1 point ago

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The fish look weirdly sharp in comparison, almost like it was shopped, but why would anyone shop that?

[–]facestab 0 points1 point ago

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Yeah I thought that

[–]stranger64 1 point2 points ago

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He'll probably go for a swim and a suck afterwords.

[–]mi_nombre_es_ricardo 0 points1 point ago

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All that just for just giving out fish? wow

[–]GrandmasterSexay 1 point2 points ago

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Was this taken from the Mythbusters wrap party?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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diabeetus

[–]minihopp 1 point2 points ago

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It's not his bucketz!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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[–]bpridilla 1 point2 points ago

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Does anybody else want to see the walrus' reaction?

[–]HailCorduroy 1 point2 points ago

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At first glance I thought that said "erection", and my response was "of course!"

[–]syntaxrigger 1 point2 points ago

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Why, on Science's green earth, do you not have a picture of AFTER the walrus sees the cake?!??! Or at least of the walrus eating it.

[–]Traktorbek 1 point2 points ago

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ಠ_ಠ That is most certainly not "bukkit," sir... don't toy with his emotions.

[–]fluffybunnyofdoom 1 point2 points ago

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"Go away! I still miss mah bucket..."

[–]Borster 1 point2 points ago

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I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together. See how they run like pigs from a gun, see how they fly. I'm crying.

Sitting on a cornflake, waiting for the van to come. Corporation tee-shirt, stupid bloody Tuesday. Man, you been a naughty boy, you let your face grow long. I am the eggman, they are the eggmen. I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob.

[–]ngorgi 3 points4 points ago

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That walrus was the happiest walrus in the world the first time they tried teaching it that trick.

[–]ComplaintBoards 0 points1 point ago

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Happy Birthday Walrus!!!!

[–]Gladin 0 points1 point ago

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Fuckin' Nessus.

[–]Niehaus 0 points1 point ago

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Is that Mike Tice, former head coach of the Minnesota Vikings?

[–]mummerlimn 0 points1 point ago

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I thought it was a giant burrito.

[–]thatblokerob 0 points1 point ago

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I really want to see what happened next...

[–]pogo123 0 points1 point ago

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The dish presentation is superb.

[–]HeatherMarMal 0 points1 point ago

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I never thought walruses were adorable until now.

[–]headcrabzombie 0 points1 point ago

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KYAAAAAAAAAAAA

[–]BigSlim 0 points1 point ago

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"You better be wearing clothes this time."

--emotionally scarred walrus

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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Took me about 30 second to figure out what the hell that was!

[–]nchojnacki 0 points1 point ago

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does anyone have the after pic?

[–]holyshitisthatmytoe 0 points1 point ago

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Any other pics to go with this?

[–]desquibnt 0 points1 point ago

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This makes it to the front page every other week.

[–]taekiew 0 points1 point ago

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MOST ADORABLE LITTLE CREATURE EVAR!

[–]frakkingcylon 0 points1 point ago

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Don't walruses have big tusks? I think that is a seal.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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At first I saw the bowl of fish as a tentacled metroid-esque creature, and I was really confused about this picture.

[–]BustyMcLeod 0 points1 point ago

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Thanks you for making me smile!

[–]StormtrooprDave 0 points1 point ago

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it looks like some kind of giant malformed penis creature.

[–]Druiddan 0 points1 point ago

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It tool me a few minutes to figure out what I was looking at.

[–]McMac 0 points1 point ago

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BUKKIT!

[–]dou10 0 points1 point ago

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repost!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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It's not quite a bucket, but the fishes are a nice gift.

[–]blacksunrising 0 points1 point ago

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Is this some crazy offshoot of the bucket seal? I feel old when memes recycle.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]ColonicIrritation 6 points7 points ago

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What

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]ColonicIrritation 0 points1 point ago

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Hi Mom