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all 107 comments

[–]Sasken 137 points138 points ago

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The next picture is of a bleeding neck stump...

[–]mycommentisimportant 57 points58 points ago

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What would you do for a Klondike bar?

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

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Everybody was really disturbed after Klondike's head of marketing got divorced, but they decided to call his new work "viral" and ran with it.

[–]Chris3411444 4 points5 points ago

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Sort of off-topic, but I had a teacher in H.S. named John Dyke. Everyone used to say, "What would you do for a JohnDykeBar?". He really hated that.

I don't know why the more obvious jokes about Mr. Dyke weren't more prevalent.

[–]thespacebase 2 points3 points ago

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That's probably why he hated it.

[–]OldBoat 1 point2 points ago

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Certainly not that!

[–]dmoted 0 points1 point ago

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WWJD for a Klondike bar?

[–]thespacebase 2 points3 points ago

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"For God so loved the world that he gave his one begotten son, that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have FREE KLONDIKE BARS FOREVER!!!"

[–]biteableniles 3 points4 points ago

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He's like a bear popsicle.

[–]anotheryear 67 points68 points ago

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[–]derspaceghost 28 points29 points ago

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This pic always gets me. That head is enormous.

[–]Pyrallis 15 points16 points ago

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That head is enormous.

So are their claws!

[–]ribosometronome 6 points7 points ago

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[–]chudontknow 13 points14 points ago

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I'm ..sorry.. i.. have...to... can't stop...

That's what she said

[–]reluctant_troll 2 points3 points ago

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The attack of the Great White Wookie.

[–]Nerdlinger 103 points104 points ago

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Polar bears are, without a doubt, the cutest deathbringers on this planet.

[–]CSIHoratioCaine 17 points18 points ago

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hippo's are also pretty cute and clumsy... a solid second place for them

[–]yoshisakan 10 points11 points ago

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[–]Davine_Chi 12 points13 points ago

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That picture instantly reminded me of Donkey Kong Country!

[–]Toof 1 point2 points ago

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I would shit myself if I stumbled on that while on a nature hike. It would be equally startling because my entire perception of how the world works would fall apart, because, why the fuck is there a rhino running around Ohio?

[–]prmaster23 0 points1 point ago

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You can see Rhinos very up-close in the Disney Animal Kingdom Safari. When I was there one of them walked right at the side of our bus less than 1 foot front it. I could had probably touched if I wanted, but obviously I am not dumb enough to do it, lol

[–]faulks 2 points3 points ago

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I think killer whales are pretty damn cute.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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aww so curious. WHACK!

my eyes the googles do nothing.

[–]scottAD 25 points26 points ago

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Just.... a little... closer.... AAOhm-nom-nom-nom-nom...

[–]JacketOS 6 points7 points ago

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Upvote for adequately spelling that onomatopoeia.

[–]TwistedBrother 1 point2 points ago

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And to you for correctly spelling onomatopoeia.

[–]JacketOS 0 points1 point ago

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Took me for fucking ever. Spell check kept telling me I was wrong and when I typed it into Google, it corrected me incorrectly. It was a time of great frustration, but I persevered.

[–]JacketOS 0 points1 point ago

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Took me for fucking ever. Spell check kept telling me I was wrong and when I typed it into Google, it corrected me incorrectly. It was a time of great frustration, but I persevered.

[–]yknik 15 points16 points ago

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"Why does that seal's breath not smell like herring?" "Why is the ice hole that seal is popping its head out of vertical?" "Why is that seal wearing sunglasses with tacky white frames?

[–]Cintiq 16 points17 points ago

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So I'm wondering if you could pat it without being mauled.
It looks so friendly. :(

[–]Turtlelover73 8 points9 points ago

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I would start scratching it's head.

[–]skullk1d 7 points8 points ago

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I would try balancing a treat on its nose.

[–]Turtlelover73 3 points4 points ago

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The treat being your head?

[–]BananaSlices 13 points14 points ago

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"I was hiding under your porch because I love you."

[–]derspaceghost 7 points8 points ago

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When I worked in the north, we were in buildings on stilts - whenever we'd go outside, we would have to check under the building for bears. Imagine not looking, walking to your truck and turning around to see that bastard running at you.

[–]reluctant_troll 10 points11 points ago

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You imagine it Lana.

[–]element8 8 points9 points ago

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danger zone

[–]Willis13579 14 points15 points ago

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It's all fun and games until someone gets their head bit off by a polar bear.

[–]alecc130 9 points10 points ago

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Today Tom tragically lost his face, finding that polar bears don't enjoy Eskimo kisses.

[–]andrewsmith1986 13 points14 points ago

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Look at the distance from snout to ears.

Fuck that.

[–]dogfartandnail 2 points3 points ago

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a liiitttllle clooooooser.

[–]DigitalLD 4 points5 points ago

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Holy dangerous D:

[–]bijibijmak 3 points4 points ago

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2 words: BAD. ASS.

[–]derspaceghost 3 points4 points ago

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This..... is not a good idea.

[–]BlastingKap 9 points10 points ago

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Well, since everyone is thinking about it, here is my rendition: A la imgur

[–]Sean42 2 points3 points ago

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Polar bears hand out Darwin Awards.

[–]enig-o-matic 3 points4 points ago

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oh hai, whatcha thinkin bout?

[–]nope_a_dope 2 points3 points ago

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Nuthin' . . . Just bear stufz.

[–]Spiderian 2 points3 points ago

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Do you want bear attacks!? Because that's how you get bear attacks!

But for serious: it's not a good idea to familiarize bears with human beings. Polar bears scavenging in Northern villages is already a pretty big problem.

[–]Kowzorz 6 points7 points ago

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TIL I want a pet polar bear.

[–]ender52 7 points8 points ago

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TIL Kowzorz has a death wish.

[–]astrosurf 5 points6 points ago

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Balls of steel.

[–]characterzer0 2 points3 points ago

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I read the title in Doug's voice, from Up.

It was beautiful.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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Wow I had no idea polar bears had such long necks.

[–]cancerface 2 points3 points ago

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[–]Spare_A_Square 2 points3 points ago

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"Human, help me get apples."

[–]Toof 2 points3 points ago

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At the local zoo, we have a polar bear exhibit that is set up like an aquarium. It has a huge pool, and you can watch them swimming underwater. Well, I was feeling like a kid, and no one was around, so I climbed onto the wall so I could put my face against the glass and watch him skirt by. (for visualization purposes) With only a few inches of glass separating us, he made eye-contact with me, and I felt a fear inside me that I have hitherto felt before. Moral of the story: That guy is a badass.

[–]gutshotjimmy 1 point2 points ago

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I don't post this very often, but I have to say:

IDIOT!

[–]vapros 1 point2 points ago

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That bear could pull a major bitch-slap-your-head-off.

[–]granitea 1 point2 points ago*

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...I'm on my way, I'm making it...

Big Time.

[–]faulks 1 point2 points ago

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Can someone shop this to make the bear's neck even longer? And wrap around like the river spirit in Spirited Away? That'd be greaat.

[–]alphabet57 1 point2 points ago

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Polar bears are cool!

[–]SupahflyJohnson 1 point2 points ago

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[–]Sciencing 2 points3 points ago

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Ah, a rare picture of the "Polar Giraffe".

[–]gnuwb 1 point2 points ago

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Fast food.

[–]DrWallyHayes 0 points1 point ago

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Got any Eskimo Pie?

[–]frumious 0 points1 point ago

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This was the subject of a fark.com photochop contest a while ago.

[–]stoicaurelius 0 points1 point ago

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And that's the reason they call it the poop deck

[–]tazebot 0 points1 point ago

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The bear isn't saying 'hi'...

[–]cupofworms 0 points1 point ago

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this is a great example of what i notice about polar bears. the length of their necks. like when a polar is just walking around and its sniffing at the ground or something you can see how long they are. i dont get the same image from a black bear.

[–]psulli 0 points1 point ago

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+1 for the photographer.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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THREEHORNS DONT PLAY WITH LONGNECKS

[–]CapnSupermarket 0 points1 point ago

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Here's the deal, human. Your dog's an idiot who wouldn't know an apple if you force-fed it to him, so you're going to do the job yourself. You get me some fucking apples, and I promise not to bathe in your favorite pet's blood. Ok? Get to work.

[–]zhacques 0 points1 point ago

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That's one hell of a neck.

[–]saltystef 0 points1 point ago

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Polar bears are actually known to hunt and kill human beings (a lot of other animals apparently don't like the way we smell/taste... probably all the soap!) I'd be careful if I were him!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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TIL that icebears have long fucking necks

[–]Christopherzilla 0 points1 point ago

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[–]freshyill 0 points1 point ago

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[–]kadno 0 points1 point ago

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That thing wants to rip his face off.

[–]fatrobot 0 points1 point ago

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They only thing scarier than a polar bear is a solar bear, which are almost extinct

[–]dead_ed 1 point2 points ago

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I saw one in the wild once. Really fuckin' bright.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

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That dude is stupid to taunt a Polar Bear (*assuming its a real photo) They look all cute but they are aggressive and vicious as fuck. I know, I'm an Eskimo.

Ps. Ok so I'm not an Eskimo but I still know shit. <grin>

[–]GatorJohnson -3 points-2 points ago

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I would slap the shit out of that bear for glory.

[–]tyler9090 2 points3 points ago

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...and you'd have your arm ripped off faster than you can say "narwhals"

[–]remnis 1 point2 points ago

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Swimming in the ocean?

[–]JPicky -1 points0 points ago

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He wants to eat your face!! With a nice Chianti and some Farber beans

[–]uhhhclem 0 points1 point ago

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Fava beans. I mean, we won't even get into the fact that in the book it was "fava beans and a big Amarone," and that the real Hannibal Lecter would rip the face off someone who'd drink Chianti with organ meat.