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top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]langer_cdn 110 points111 points ago

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this would be so good for ipad porn

[–][deleted] 213 points214 points ago

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The iArm; Because you've got better things to do with your hands™

[–]JudasKandinsky 127 points128 points ago

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DID YOU JUST TRADEMARK HANDS?!

[–]andypants 46 points47 points ago

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Oh shit, he just trademarked hands™ D:

[–]kyookumbah 22 points23 points ago

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Don't worry, Grabbers™ will ensure healthy competition in the limb market.

[–]R3MY 5 points6 points ago

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Nuh-uh, he can't 'cause I already trademarked h™, n™, d™ and s™ (you can't trademark vowels).

[–]nimbusnacho 11 points12 points ago

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I thought you had to buy vowels?

[–][deleted] 48 points49 points ago

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How do you get the screen to stop shaking around?

[–]bobdolebobdole 37 points38 points ago

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switch hit

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points ago

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But what if I have one on each arm? Clearly this design is inelegant. Needs some sort of gyroscopic robotic centering shock absorbing mechanism, like a chicken head.

[–]vwllss 1 point2 points ago

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Hey, that dude is a redditor

[–]bobdolebobdole 3 points4 points ago

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hmmm.... gf maybe?

[–]charliedayman 33 points34 points ago

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Because if I have my girlfriend with me, I would much rather have her hold my iPads in place while I jerk off two-handed with iPads velcro'd to my arms than have sex with her.

[–][deleted] 19 points20 points ago

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Hey man, for every beautiful woman out there, there's a guy who'd rather jerk off while she holds his iPads steady.

[–]Owy2001 7 points8 points ago

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Related. (Slightly NSFW)

[–]sittingcow 1 point2 points ago

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Take a drink!

[–]LegoLegume 1 point2 points ago

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No, no, no. You work with the shaking. Get an app that makes boobs bounce when the screen moves.

[–][deleted] 420 points421 points ago

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Pipboy 3000....

Close enough

[–]elegylegacy 181 points182 points ago

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At first I thought this was the stupidest idea ever marketed.

After reading your comment, now I desperately want one.

[–]IBoris 67 points68 points ago

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A challenger appears!

A real life pipboy that you can buy : http://www.parvus.com/product/overview.aspx?prod=ZypadWR1100

Edit : from the description : The Zypad® WR1100 rugged wrist-worn personal computer (PC) is a powerful wearable computing device designed for harsh environmental conditions that can be worn comfortably on the user’s wrist for hands-free operation. The WR1100 is designed to meet MIL-STD-810F and MIL-STD-461E requirements, making it an ideal solution for military, homeland defense, first responder, security, and emergency service field and in-vehicle applications.

[–][deleted] 24 points25 points ago

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Doesn't look like it could sustain damage from one of the Tunnel Snakes much less from a Super Mutant

[–]The_Trapeze_Swinger 9 points10 points ago

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Tunnel Snakes rule!

[–]nothing_clever 4 points5 points ago

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I'm just curious, does anybody have an idea how much something like that would cost?

[–]Slayer706 10 points11 points ago

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My rule of thumb is, if you have to inquire about the price it is probably too expensive.

[–]nothing_clever 2 points3 points ago

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So they say. And I'm a few steps to far into the poor college student line of work to really hope for such a thing any time soon.

That said, I'm still curious as hell.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Another rule of thumb is if it's military is twice as too expensive.

[–]the_dull_roar 15 points16 points ago

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No, that's Leela's wrist thingy

[–]cwm44 7 points8 points ago

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I still want one. It would be perfect for controlling an army of robot skeletons.

[–]kn0where 9 points10 points ago

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It's for Pong.

[–]ArcticExcavator 3 points4 points ago

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Commander Keen?

[–]buggereet 3 points4 points ago*

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I've been ogling that for years. I would totally start a business just so I could make my employees wear them.

edit: And then maybe invent a power fist for them to wear on their other hand. :D

[–]Revived 1 point2 points ago

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How much is it? I can't seem to find the price tag

[–]Skitrel 2 points3 points ago

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Hahaha, my HTC has more computing power than that XD

[–]rational_agent 20 points21 points ago

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Wouldn't a pipboy be more the size of an iPod Touch?

[–]VJamz 10 points11 points ago

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I think you're over thinking this a bit. But I do agree.

[–]rational_agent 1 point2 points ago

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You're probably right.

[–]VJamz 2 points3 points ago

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Then again, you ARE being rational.

Edit: But... this iPad arm thing... is far from rational.

[–]cache_money 7 points8 points ago

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Steampunk one and Ebay it stat.

[–]funkmon 15 points16 points ago

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You just blew my mind.

[–]Peaches666 13 points14 points ago

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Ctrl+f: Pip...

...DAMN!

[–]pics-or-didnt-happen 738 points739 points ago

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I like the dinner plate attachment. Finally, eating dinner while I eat dinner won't get in the way of my eating dinner!

[–]DLun203 185 points186 points ago

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That part made me laugh so hard. Seriously, it eliminates the use of an entire hand. It only leaves you with one hand to use a fork. No knife hand. Prepare to make a mess.

[–]xlamplighter 123 points124 points ago

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Oh crap, sales are down on the iPod plate holder thingy. Better re-brand it to a childrens superhero forearm shield.

[–]rivalius13 141 points142 points ago

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CHILDREN'S superhero forearm shield? I DEMAND ADULT SUPERHERO FOREARM SHIELDS!!

[–]logicom 151 points152 points ago

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THIS THING IS SWEET!! I can totally use this forearm shield as a plate!

[–]WannabeAndroid 38 points39 points ago

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It's the circle of life.

[–]xarkx 25 points26 points ago

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the circle of jerking

[–]Exedous 27 points28 points ago

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The Jerkle of life

[–]ramalamatomselleck 1 point2 points ago

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the steve urkle of life

[–]overreacts-to-puns 22 points23 points ago

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YOUR FUCKING PUN THREADS ARE RUINING REDDIT FOR REAL REDDITORS. GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE. DELETE YOUR ACCOUNT AND TAKE YOUR COMPUTER FOR A LONG WALK OFF A SHORT PIER.

[–]Mpoumpis 10 points11 points ago

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What, you mean with tits?

[–]ahmadamaj 2 points3 points ago

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yes, so you can play with tits with one hand while you play with tits with the other.

[–]SickBoy88 13 points14 points ago

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YO DAWG, I HEARD YOU LIKE ECCENTRICA GALLUMBITS, THE TRIPLE-BREASTED WHORE OF EROTICON 6.

[–]BreakfastBurrito 9 points10 points ago

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I've already been using dinner plates as Deku Shields for years.

[–]Skitrel 2 points3 points ago

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Me too! They totally don't catch fire too!

[–]odd-ball 6 points7 points ago

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just attach dildo to make it "adult"

[–]GeekEyeCon 2 points3 points ago

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Rule 34.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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MY FOREARM HAS GONE UNPROTECTED FOR TOO LONG!

[–]Exedous 0 points1 point ago

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FUCK YES

[–]64-17-5 3 points4 points ago

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With iPad -20% Crucial hit

[–]blueiiiis 1 point2 points ago

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Maybe it should be on a headband rather than an arm band. I'd love to have a mini desk attached to my head. I wouldn't even need reading glasses. I could just adjust it closer to my eyes when reading and closer to my mouth when eating.

[–]jsayrbook 14 points15 points ago

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I'm sure there's an app out there that will take care of the knife problem.

[–]ryant9878 8 points9 points ago

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or just lick the food off of the plate.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

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As a former server, I assumed it was for waiting tables.

[–]RainbowUnicorns 10 points11 points ago

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I read this as forearm server...

[–]saintNIC 1 point2 points ago

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that you HAL?

[–]grampybone 2 points3 points ago

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It only leaves you with one hand to use a fork. No knife hand. Prepare to make a mess

That's by design, probably, since whoever buys this cannot be trusted with a knife anyway.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Just wait until you take a drink.

[–]sthrmn 1 point2 points ago

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Hey man, if you only need one mouse button, you only need one fucking hand. You're holding it wrong dude.

Come on.

[–]tyrghast 1 point2 points ago

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Typically your right hand is your knife hand. You hold the fork in your left, cut with your right and set the knife down and return the fork to your right hand to eat. These are good manners, according to my grandmother.

[–]mookichii 1 point2 points ago

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What about using it while driving. The arm with the plate on the steering and the other to serve yourself. No more unefficiant use. Still making mess though.

[–]MediocrityUno 10 points11 points ago

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[–]dezweb 1 point2 points ago

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Does it come with the Matthew McConaughey? If so, I'll take one, too

[–]eyecite 6 points7 points ago

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Or a prosthetic arm attached with a watch on it.

Late for work? On a crowded bus? Don't have time to wear a watch? BOY DO WE HAVE THE PRODUCT FOR YOU!

[–]SpechalEd 92 points93 points ago

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Yo dawg..

[–]lolgrim 221 points222 points ago

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YO DAWG I HEARD YOU LIKE DINNER SO WE PUT YOUR DINNER ON YOUR IARM SO YOU CAN EAT DINNER WHILE YOU'RE A DOUCHE.

[–]anonnow 43 points44 points ago

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At first I was like D: then I was like :D

[–]R0CKET_B0MB 58 points59 points ago

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How the hell did you move your eyes below your mouth?!

[–]sobe53711 2 points3 points ago

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He was literally rolling on the floor, laughing.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

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it's just a backwards D

[–]brickman1444 8 points9 points ago

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Seriously???

[–]jaavaaguru 2 points3 points ago

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No, it's a backwards Ɑ

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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/vomit

[–]workroom 1 point2 points ago

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RAMIREZ, MAKE DINNER!

[–]Tgg161 54 points55 points ago

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I carry around all my gadgets on a bandoleer, bandito-style.

[–]el_chupacupcake 30 points31 points ago

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Oh no! Space banditos!

[–]ieatpants 13 points14 points ago

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did you hear maracas?

[–]polymorph505 9 points10 points ago

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I knew that Sombrero galaxy would be trouble...

[–]notParanoid 6 points7 points ago

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nobody can hear your maracas in space.

[–]rannelvis 1 point2 points ago

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i actually have a bandolier. it's called the kangatek go. holds my phone, wallet, phone, keys, swiss army knife, and other crap. unfortunately, I can not use it to passive-aggressively whack people when they don't move aside when I'm trying to exit a crowded train, like I could with my old messenger bag.

[–]Smyley 2 points3 points ago

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That looks like a fancy fanny pack.

[–]Dr_Schrodinger 1 point2 points ago

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[–]havox 45 points46 points ago

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You can purchase it as a prankbox here... http://www.prankpack.com/buy/iarm-prank-pack-fake-gift-box.html

[–]Sophism 8 points9 points ago

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I'll take one of those and two Bear Beards please

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points ago

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Bear Beard

I thought it was going to be a fake beard for bears.

[–]kokushozero 5 points6 points ago

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I know, I feel cheated too

[–]Sophism 1 point2 points ago

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If only

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points ago

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[–]sirbruce 4 points5 points ago

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Fuck that should be real god dammit.

[–]IbidtheWriter 2 points3 points ago

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Reminds me of the beginning of back to the future.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

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I am the model for the beer beard. I have a close relationship with the creator of the prankpack

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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[–]TooTallForPony[!] 1 point2 points ago

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TIL where all of my Christmas present boxes will come from.

[–][deleted] 44 points45 points ago

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Son, iArm disappoint

[–]CaptainConfidential 442 points443 points ago

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[–]BeInThisMoment 18 points19 points ago

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And I thought nothing else could possibly be done with that photo... Iarm corrected.

[–]frenger 2 points3 points ago

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They weren't doing any arm, man

[–][deleted] 120 points121 points ago

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[slow clap]

[–]SquareRoot 56 points57 points ago

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Why do you fuckers have to Keanize everything?

Carry on.

[–]conorp 73 points74 points ago

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[–]SquareRoot 5 points6 points ago

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You are an evil, evil man.

[–]le_transcriber 3 points4 points ago*

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[kiənaɪz]

[–]metal_falsetto 36 points37 points ago

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Please tell me this is one of The Onion's fake product gift boxes....

[–][deleted] 24 points25 points ago

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[–]theninjaforhire 3 points4 points ago

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I want coffee talkies.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

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Control-f "onion."

Upvote.

[–]lonelyinacrowd 1 point2 points ago

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onion

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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auto-upvote.

[–]balchynz 30 points31 points ago

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Finally I can stop losing my remotes!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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I know right? The question is can it stretch around the obese arms of people that will desperately want it?

[–]Ta_Da 26 points27 points ago

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It's like Yu-Gi-Oh! all over again...

[–]kidintheshadows 23 points24 points ago

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NOT SO FAST SETO KAIBA! You've activated my trap card!

[–]justgetmeonhere 18 points19 points ago

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We'll settle this like adults; by playing a children's card game!

[–]KaylaS 7 points8 points ago

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Wait did you just summon a bunch of monsters in one turn?

[–]justgetmeonhere 7 points8 points ago

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Screw the rules, I have money.

[–]KaylaS 7 points8 points ago

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My voice gives me super strength!

[–]justgetmeonhere 4 points5 points ago

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IN AMERICA!

[–]darkshaddow42 2 points3 points ago

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And magic stuff.

[–]nextofpumpkin 7 points8 points ago

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I summon - Blue Eyes White Dragon!

[–]darkshaddow42 4 points5 points ago

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Blue Eyes Toon Dragon, bitch!

[–]bkbeezy 3 points4 points ago

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Giant wall of Kuriboh!

[–]KaylaS 1 point2 points ago

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Oh Kaiba-boy!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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A TRAP CARD?!

[–]DarqWolff 11 points12 points ago

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[–][deleted] 9 points10 points ago

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]badusagi 16 points17 points ago

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Robo douche, blue tooth and you're set

[–]sharkopotamus 5 points6 points ago

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I'd like to see him actually drink coffee while wearing that contraption. That wouldn't be awkward at all.

[–]sockthepuppetry 6 points7 points ago

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[–]Knute5 4 points5 points ago

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Could I use it for for my iFalcon?

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]arexx 32 points33 points ago

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iAWESARM.

[–]ideonode 22 points23 points ago

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iSOREARM

[–]iwanabench 14 points15 points ago

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iARMSOME

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points ago

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iAMSAM

[–]beable 15 points16 points ago

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SAMiAM

[–]solidwhetstone 11 points12 points ago

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iDonotlikegreeneggsandham

[–]gmick 4 points5 points ago

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WTF? No bluetooth? This guy's an impostor! He's a douchebag wannabe.

[–]petedawes 79 points80 points ago

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If Apple actually released this, fanboys would be lining up to buy one.

[–]FrankReynolds 36 points37 points ago

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Revolutionary®

[–]Dangger 40 points41 points ago

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This changes everything, again.®

[–]lonelyinacrowd 1 point2 points ago

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, again

[–]Atario 6 points7 points ago

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Magical®

[–]Virtualmatt 42 points43 points ago

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And if Google released this, every redditor would buy two, in case the first one breaks.

[–]Longchamp 3 points4 points ago

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I love comments like this because the show me roughly how many apple fanboys there are out there that will lash out whenever they feel 'attacked'.

[–]Crackorjackzors 4 points5 points ago

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Fucking awesome, I'd like one.

[–]invertedspear 2 points3 points ago

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Where are the Futurama photoshops for this?

[–]braid 2 points3 points ago

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Now someone needs to make an app that mimics a Predator's wrist console so you can initiate the self-destruct sequence.

[–]horationelson 2 points3 points ago

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New from Apple, the Mugger iPlatform™. Simply attach your out-of-date and obsolete Apple hardware to this handy mobile display stand and you'll be the centre of your very own mugger-scrum. It's the easy way to get rid of Apple stuff you bought which has fallen out of fashion or which is more than 3 months old. No more pesky recycling fees!

The Mugger iPlatform™ presents such a tempting opening to opportunist thieves that you might be able to get your Microsoft hardware stolen - but on that we'll make no guarantees!

[–]MouthBreather 2 points3 points ago

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iDouche

[–]mijj 2 points3 points ago

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people wont buy this device. It only highlights that they're too poor to hire a robot butler.

[–]DSLJohn 2 points3 points ago

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I like how it will hit you in the head when you have a drink.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points ago

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What does it say about Apple if I cant decide if this is serious or not? ...

[–]digital_dong 1 point2 points ago

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  • Carry iPad around
  • Drink coffee
  • Not look like a douche

You may pick two options.

[–]Thrasymachus 1 point2 points ago

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Oh god, please let this become a Thing. I want to see this out and about everywhere . . .

[–]skitz1o1 1 point2 points ago

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That is one important mother fucker!

[–]mynameisjavits 1 point2 points ago

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Obligatory He probably has one of these at home too.

[–]Redebo 1 point2 points ago

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At least he's not pictured with a bluetooth head set in his ear.

[–]elie195 1 point2 points ago

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If the guy was using a Bluetooth headset that would make my head explode.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Looks so stupid it might actually sell.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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WORST dick tracy phone EVER!

[–]dbecks 1 point2 points ago

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Being a fellow human being... this is a bit embarrassing.

[–]jasonhamrick 1 point2 points ago

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I honestly can't tell if this is a real product or a parody. I don't know if that says something about me... or about the iWorld.

[–]HarleyLowSpeed 1 point2 points ago

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Nah, it's douchey.

[–]cardiokush 1 point2 points ago

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I imagine if they dispensed tissue and lube these could be handy... iFap

[–]EndymionAwake 1 point2 points ago

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Okay, now put the guy on the image there driving a car and the image would be complete. Cause the guy with coffee and a cell phone ain't bad enough.

[–]jerrorist 1 point2 points ago

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I would seriously buy this if it existed. I may even build one myself. Holding a coffee? Convenient. On the train? Convenient. Jerking off? Double convenient.

[–]Gamervail 1 point2 points ago

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This reminds me of the thing they played Yu-Gi-Oh on about the time Yu-Gi-Oh started to suck.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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That would come in handy.

[–]TDETLES 1 point2 points ago

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Im trying to think of a witty pun, but I really cant. I really cant.

[–]latrec 1 point2 points ago

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These are NOT from the onion, they are at: http://www.prankpack.com/

[–]DoctorMiracles 1 point2 points ago

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The moment he takes a sip from his frappemochalattematto, he'll crack the ipad screen with his forehead.

[–]NotYourMothersDildo[S] 1 point2 points ago

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[–]pjherring 1 point2 points ago

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Oh snap! Ipad App idea! Picture of a woman fairly well endowed. When you shake iPad the appropriate body parts shake. Strap one of these babies on to your arm that you use to...you know...and taadaa!

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]PedanticDouchebag 1 point2 points ago

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Conflicted...

[–]fux0r 1 point2 points ago

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I deliberately shove people using iPads. And as expected from apple users, they picked up what's left in silence and walked away.

Fucking pretentious homos.

[–]Anarch157a 1 point2 points ago

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i get dibs on that idea.

around 1989 i straped a bracelet on an HP 15C calculator so i could have easy access to it while siting in my desk at school. the other students used to have fun at me because of that, but it really pratical, specially during tests.

[–]Majora26 1 point2 points ago

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Would this work on my ankles?

[–]rockcanteverdie 1 point2 points ago

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oh sweet, a plate mount! now i can use both hands to cut and.......wait a minute.....

[–]icky_boo 1 point2 points ago

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is it possible to even look more of a douche?

[–]krakow057 1 point2 points ago

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what?

if anything, this sort of thing will make someone look more of a douche.

can't wait to see one so I can 'accidentaly' bump into one.

oops!

[–]here1am 1 point2 points ago

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Why haven't they used Chelsea Kate Isaacs as hand model for the illustrations on the box? She has remarkable hands and if someone thinks she's holding it wrong she can always contact Steve for additional clarifications.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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I'll show you a forearm mount.

[–]latrec 1 point2 points ago

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[–]jaycee25 1 point2 points ago

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the picture on the back is much better: http://imgur.com/gsC2u

[–]pahncrd 3 points4 points ago*

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Finally, an apple fan with one arm can masturbate to his iPad.

EDIT: BTW, I masturbate to my iPhone 4 (very often), so don't assume I hate Apple products. ;)

[–]Owy2001 10 points11 points ago

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Do you masturbate to porn on your iPhone 4, or do you masturbate to the phone itself? These are very different activities.

[–]pahncrd 2 points3 points ago

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[redacted]

[–]ninety6days 6 points7 points ago

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I'm not sure that there's any way to own, let alone carry, an iPad without being a douche.

[–]char0n 1 point2 points ago

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NOT look like a douche?

This is like the iPad version of a bluetooth headset.