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top 200 commentsshow all 320

[–]darkreign 45 points46 points ago

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I've got some advice:

USE .PNG FOR TEXT HEAVY PICTURES FFS!

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]YAOMTC 6 points7 points ago*

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You mean besides GIF animations.

[–]Speff 6 points7 points ago

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[–]twopoint718 10 points11 points ago

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Way to rep PNG.

[–]CrackIsGoodForYou 82 points83 points ago

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Sounds like Einstein's riddle.

[–]chrisskinr 158 points159 points ago*

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There are 5 potential girls to date with 5 different names. Each girl has a different color hair. Each girl has a one pro and one con to dating them. Each girl is also ranked in order of how much she likes Trevor (1 being the most, 5 being the least). No two girls have the same pro or con, and there are no ties in ranking.

The question is: Who has herpes?

Hints:

  • Amber has dyed blonde hair
  • Katie is a jealous bitch
  • Becca likes Trevor second most
  • Vanessa likes Trevor a little bit more than Katie
  • Vanessa likes Trevor 4th most
  • The person whom Trevor is dating's con is that she only texts him
  • The brown haired girl's pro is that she lets trevor walk all over her
  • Amber likes Trevor 3rd most
  • Ally likes Trevor the most
  • The girl who is willing to break up Trevor and whoever he is dating likes him slightly more or slightly less than the girl who only texts Trevor
  • The girl who can only date when she turns 16 likes Trevor slightly more or slightly less than the girl who lets Trevor walk all over her
  • The girl whose pro is that she already dated Trevor is a jealous bitch
  • Vanessa's pro is that she is a slut
  • Ally likes Trevor slightly more or less than the black haired girl
  • The girl who is willing to break up Trevor with whoever he is dating likes him slightly more or less than the girl with dyed blonde hair.

[–]PlasmaWhore 58 points59 points ago

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I used to love doing those things in 6th grade math class.

[–]chrisskinr 22 points23 points ago

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They should've had a Logic class

[–]cedargrove 17 points18 points ago

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We had GT (Gifted and Talented), we basically spent half of our time doing puzzles like this.

[–]PlasmaWhore 9 points10 points ago

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Instead of GT ours was called TAG(Talented and Gifted) and GATE(Gifted and TalEnted)

[–]FANGO 9 points10 points ago

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GATE = "Gifted And Talented Education"

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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Mine was called "KQ" for Knowledge Quest! Yipee!!!

[–]cedargrove 29 points30 points ago

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I always thought it was fucked up that they took us out of class to learn this stuff, as if they had to hide it from the other kids for fear it would blow their minds. I'm sure a lot of kids who weren't selected for GT, TAG, etc. would have benefited from education in logic and pattern recognition. Of course they don't initially do well on it, they've never been taught it, and just because I picked it up faster than some other kids doesn't mean I was smarter than them. Frankly, I never had the motivation to be an A student once natural ability lost ground to the necessity to study, the cost to benefit ratio never seemed to make sense for me. But I imagined the kids who picked things up slower also had time to organize their brains or priorities differently than I, maybe I'm wrong, who knows.

[–]frikk 2 points3 points ago

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we should talk about this sometime. -kid who didnt get into Gate.

[–]straatfiter 5 points6 points ago

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I always thought it was fucked up that they took us out of class to learn this stuff, as if they had to hide it from the other kids for fear it would blow their minds.

I don't think this was the motivation. I've always been an A student because of the desire not to 'hide it from the other kids'... your education is slowed down to the lowest 33% ish, guessing, percentile. God bless.

Frankly, I never had the motivation to be an A student once natural ability lost ground to the necessity to study, the cost to benefit ratio never seemed to make sense for me.

Amen.

[–]plbogen 4 points5 points ago

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I'm like that too.. still am.. and its got me through College and into a doctorate program. So I figure I'm doing something right. I've known the "must get As at all cost" types and frankly they seem miserable. I TA'd a girl once who cried when she got a B on an assignment.

[–]AvatarJandar 2 points3 points ago*

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It's true. I am one of those "must get As" types, and I am often miserable while in classes. It's an addiction.

[–]fidmart85 2 points3 points ago

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you grew up in texas?

[–]cedargrove 2 points3 points ago

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Nope, I'm a military brat, grew up in a few places, though I was born in Texas and currently live in Texas. Why the question?

[–]fidmart85 2 points3 points ago

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i grew up in texas and our classes were also called gifted and talented (GT) and i was curious to see if it was a state-wide thing.

[–]cedargrove 2 points3 points ago

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I was in Alaska at the time I was in GT. Where at in Texas?

[–]fidmart85 2 points3 points ago

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austin

[–]memsisthefuture 35 points36 points ago

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I'm going to go ahead and assume they all have herpes.

[–]chrisskinr 12 points13 points ago

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Einstein was a womanizer...

[–]byte1918 3 points4 points ago

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Something harder..

There are 12 rocks. One rock has a different weight (that means it can be lighter or heavier than the rest of the rocks). You have a balance. You can weight the rocks 3 times in any order you want but after the 3rd weighting you need to know exactly which rock is the different one and if it's lighter or heavier than the rest of them.

[–]broskibrobra 8 points9 points ago*

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Put 4 rocks on one side of the balance, 4 rocks on the other. If they weigh the same, then the "bad" rock is among the remaining 4. In this case the problem isn't that hard (if you next weigh 2 of the remaining 4 against 1 of the remaining 4 + 1 of the original 8, you're practically done).

If the first 8 rocks don't all weigh the same, it's trickier. Call the 4 rocks on the heavier side of the balance 'h' and the 4 on the lighter side 'L' and the 4 leftover rocks (that you know to be standard weight) 's'. Your next step should be to weigh 6 rocks, like so:

hhL vs. hLs

If they weigh the same, these 3 h's and 2 L's clearly all weigh the same. So you have 2 L's and 1 h left over that could be the "bad" rock, so just weigh the 2 L's against each other and you're done.

If the hhL side is heavier, weigh the 2 h's on that side of the scale against each other, and you're done.

If the hLs side is heavier, weigh the h on that side against an s and you're done.

I omitted why you're done to save space. I hate it when math textbooks do that, but this is reddit, so, to quote a cartoon character, I do what I want.

[–]paulshannon 7 points8 points ago*

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so just weigh the 2 L's against each other and you're done.

good job, except right there. You don't know which of the L's is the abnormal one, so instead of weighing them against each other you would pick one and weigh it against an 's'. If they weigh the same the other L is the abnormal one, and if they don't that L is the abnormal one (obviously).

Edit: just noticed you also said,

weigh the 2 h's on that side of the scale against each other, and you're done.

The final step in each case is to weigh one of the 2 suspects against an 's'.

I imagine your brain snuck in the assumption that you know whether the abnormal stone is heavier or lighter, but you only know that it is heavier OR lighter.

[–]broskibrobra 2 points3 points ago

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Oh yeah you're right, I somehow didn't process "and if it's lighter or heavier than the rest of them."

[–]Notmyrealname 21 points22 points ago

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More like an SAT question.

[–]relic2279 3 points4 points ago*

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If I had to vote on the question for the answer 42, that would be right up there.

(4)(2) = 8

8 / 4 = 2

Give each girl 2 dates. Whichever one impresses you the most, attracts you the most, sleeps with you after a crazy convoluted sexual request is a preferred date.

Marriage is an entirely different problem.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago*

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Marriage is an entirely different problem.

Don't even get me started... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stable_marriage_problem

[–]Stuckbetweenstations 30 points31 points ago

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It's like an LSAT question.

[–]genuinepolitician 6 points7 points ago

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Woman are in no way logical, so I would say it's the opposite of an LSAT question.

[–]Chirp08 27 points28 points ago

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If it were an LSAT question the correct answer would be Becca even though the logic leads to Amber, and no they can't tell you why.

[–]jambajews 8 points9 points ago

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This is not the credited response.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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180

[–]Notmyrealname 18 points19 points ago

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But he will need a lawyer if he starts dating Becca.

[–]Howie509 15 points16 points ago

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Becca.

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points ago

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I'm going to start an advice column about teenage relationships called "Just The Tips"

[–]hopstar 10 points11 points ago

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Will it be in the special pull out section of the newspaper?

[–]andrejevas 4 points5 points ago

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I think it would be more successful as an insert.

[–]byte1918 544 points545 points ago*

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The screenshot was taken 1 second after the post was made so it's clear that someone is trying to be an attention whore.

[–]benologist 28 points29 points ago

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Isn't that whole point of yahoo answers? Post something and then post it to digg/reddit/etc so everyone can see how super awesome you are.

[–]philpill 27 points28 points ago

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craigslist as well

"To woman/man/dog who raped/mugged/burned/fucked/dated me the other night .... etc, etc, etc, ad nauseum"

[–]Bloody_Eye 18 points19 points ago*

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I think something like 90% of craigslist posts could have their meanings perfectly conveyed with the exact same madlib.

[–]Eratosthenes 2 points3 points ago

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Somebody, get on this!

[–]benologist 2 points3 points ago*

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To the person dissing craiglist idiots:

I saw you on the subway. You didn't see me because I was wearing a green sweater. It was cold that day. I was on my way home from work which I normally do and you decided it would be awesome to post a smartass remark on reddit.

[–]Qubed 42 points43 points ago

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Listen Trevor, you definitely don't want to be an attention whore. Attention whores come with the crabs.

[–]bruinhenryd 6 points7 points ago

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i always knew the woman of my dreams would come to me with crabs in her hands...

[–]bechus 8 points9 points ago

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you will need some melted butter and a hammer

[–]philpill 7 points8 points ago

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then maybe sort out those crabs with some special shampoo afterwards

[–]Brenbren25 347 points348 points ago

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ye, but it was pretty funny. A well deserved upvote.

[–]taligent 200 points201 points ago*

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Agreed. If I was a master of analysis I would share my skills with the world. It's only fair.

[–]Benjaphar 131 points132 points ago

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Agreed. If I were a master of screen capturing, I would not give the world a jpg of text.

[–]deflective 238 points239 points ago

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he's a master of analysis not anti-alias

[–]Krippy 39 points40 points ago

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What is the more appropriate format? PNG?

(serious question)

[–]FerricOxide 61 points62 points ago*

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The JPEG standard was designed for the compression and transmission of natural images (photographs), since its compression scheme employs the DCT, which most resembles the analogous basis functions of the KLT for a typical natural image. When compressing, high frequency information is usually thrown away. For this reason, the DCT is poor at capturing sharp changes. GIF and PNG, on the other hand, are better for computer graphics and logos. They use an indexed palette (encode fewer colors). They perform poorly on natural images, which may produce a wide range of color values.

[–]maweaver 33 points34 points ago

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In simplified English, he's saying that JPG is a lossy compression that tends to blur edges (because it does a transform into the frequency domain and then tosses out high frequency parts of the image, which tend to be the sharp edges). Photos and stuff don't tend to have as many sharp edges, so it's not as noticeable and tends to compress better. But with things like text and logos, you get blurry edges and the compression isn't that great.

GIF and PNG are both lossless, so better for things like text. GIF is a very simple compression algorithm, whereas PNG is smarter, and so is more often used nowadays.

FerricOxide, you obviously know more about this than I do, does that sound about right?

[–][deleted] 57 points58 points ago

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In more simplified English, JPEG is for photographs. GIF and PNG are for text and logos. JPEG makes text look all fuzzy.

[–]WrongSubreddit 23 points24 points ago

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simplified: PNG good

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points ago*

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Not really, no. PNG bad for photos, particularly if bandwidth is an issue. JPEG for Photos, PNG for text and logos.

Edit: I meant "text and logos" as the above poster had said, not "text and images".

[–]FerricOxide 7 points8 points ago*

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GIF and PNG are both lossless, so better for things like text. GIF is a very simple compression algorithm, whereas PNG is smarter, and so is more often used nowadays.

FerricOxide, you obviously know more about this than I do, does that sound about right?

Yes, that sounds about right. Also, the main motivation for PNG was to avoid the patented LZW compression algorithm, since people had to pay royalties to use GIF in their hardware or software. PNG has a lot more features than GIF, including the ability to store more than 256 colors, an alpha layer, and better compression (just to name a few).

Also, an interesting factoid: The PNG website uses a JPEG image for their logo.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

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Also, an interesting factoid: The PNG website uses a JPEG image for their logo.

If only more companies realized that their product isn't necessarily the best thing ever for every application.

[–]cibyr 2 points3 points ago*

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Another interesting factoid: GIF does have the ability to store more than 256 colours

(PNG is still a better format though)

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago*

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Simplified: JPEG throws away lots of little parts of your photograph. Fine for photos, but not for images with sharp edges (like computer screen shots and cartoons). For screen shots, cartoons, line art, and such, use PNG files.

[–]jamesinc 5 points6 points ago

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Okay, imagine this were a university assignment. BAM. -2 marks because you failed to define your acronyms the first time you used them. DCT? KLT? What the fuck are they, why are they relevant? I don't have time to look that shit up, if you want to sell me on this idea that the JPG format was designed for photography, you have to be clear.

As it happens I know what you're talking about, I just really dislike people dropping obscure acronyms like that.

[–]FerricOxide 5 points6 points ago

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I apologize. Usually, the people I work with know what they are so we just throw these terms around, but I shouldn't do so when I'm explaining what it is. Here are some explanations for people who don't know:

DCT (Discrete Cosine Transform): a data transform similar to the Fourier Transform, but designed to generate real coefficients. Its basis functions are formed from cosine waves at varying frequencies.

KLT (Karhunen Loeve Transform): A transform based on the data that is optimal in the mean-square sense (mss). It is often used to compare to a transform that is not data dependent. Its basis functions are generated in order from highest energy to lowest energy (you can think of energy as how representative a certain function could be with respect to your data).

[–]blackdeath88012 2 points3 points ago

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seriously how the fuck did all of this come from a picture about teenage relationship advice.

[–]jamesinc 1 point2 points ago

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Thanks! Sorry if I was a little harsh in the previous post.

[–]pelirrojo 12 points13 points ago

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Yes, that is ideal.

[–]x-cubed 8 points9 points ago

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or just link to the web page

[–]salmangz 2 points3 points ago

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Agreed, If I was a master of http://mastersofnothing.ytmnd.com/

[–]Benjaphar 1 point2 points ago

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Respect the Fearcondom.

[–]donttaseme 3 points4 points ago

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If only we had a MikeyJam as a voice of reason. "Should I do my work or reddit at work?"

[–][deleted] 20 points21 points ago

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2nd'd.

Funny regardless.

[–]tbarlow13 14 points15 points ago

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Would have been better if signed Amber or from the handle Amber.

[–]DarkQuest 43 points44 points ago

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All roads lead to Amber.

[–]redreplicant 21 points22 points ago

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Zelazny? In MY Reddit?

...marry me

[–]Raff001 12 points13 points ago

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I think I'm beginning to see a pattern here. Its a fine line to walk.

[–]DarkQuest 9 points10 points ago

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I think I got lost in shadow a while back

[–]esotericguy 3 points4 points ago

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Chaos > Amber

That's right, I went there.

[–]DarkQuest 1 point2 points ago

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It's one hell of a ride.

[–]DarkQuest 3 points4 points ago

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marry me

Is that legal where you live?

[–]redreplicant 5 points6 points ago

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Provided that you are a dude.

[–]DarkQuest 16 points17 points ago

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I must apologise: I did that annoying thing of assuming that people on the internet are guys by default and switched into gay banter mode. Time to go into "ZOMG A FEMALE" mode and start with the wedding plans before you change your mind. How about march?

[–]m741 4 points5 points ago

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Not only is it a girl on the internet, but she knows who Zelazny is. That's a catch.

[–]redreplicant 2 points3 points ago

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I'm afraid I've bitten off more than I can chew; I've already married one Redditor, two is probably more than I could handle...

[–]barkingllama 7 points8 points ago*

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Can I interject with a "no girls on the intarwebz" ...or at least not any that can fit through the tubes.

[–]FANGO 1 point2 points ago

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It could be a guy living in Massachusetts or Connecticut, too, so don't give up on the gay banter yet.

[–]DarkQuest 2 points3 points ago

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I'll go and check.

[–]DarkQuest 8 points9 points ago

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Good news: yes!

Does it matter that I'm liberal european hippy scum?

[–]Tryke 12 points13 points ago

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More like Amber Alert, m i rite?

[–]twister6284 4 points5 points ago*

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The beginning was pretty funny. ("Is your name Trevor? No? Well it is now.") The middle was insightful. Towards the end, the post went over the top and got a little too weird.

[–]benihana 1 point2 points ago

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That wasn't funny, though.

[–]scarabic 2 points3 points ago

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Can anyone explain why the hell I read all that? Someone older than 18 who does not have his head up his ass LAYS DOWN DA TROOT for some pants-pissed little shit who's getting batted around by middle school gossip.

"DON COMMIT THA STACHATORY RAPE MAH LIL FOOL"

And we all go ga-ga as if this is some amazing web phenomenon? Please piss up a rope all of you stupid children.

[–][deleted] 78 points79 points ago

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Whatever dude. I still laughed. Do you get all up on your buddies when they tell a joke too?

[–][deleted] ago*

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[deleted]

[–]gatsby137 20 points21 points ago

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I see what you did there, but I won't point it out because I don't want you to be called an attention whore.

[–]RECURSIVE_META_JOKE 34 points35 points ago

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Everyone is an attention whore, some are just better at covering it up.

[–][deleted] 27 points28 points ago

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NO I'M NOT!

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

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You're not good at covering it up?

[–]bechus 1 point2 points ago

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well I am less of an attention whore than you so I am better

[–]S7evyn 8 points9 points ago

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I'm just as non-competitive as everybody else. In fact, I'm the MOST non-competitive, so I win.

[–]NightGolfer 15 points16 points ago*

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Obviously. If the poster hadn't taken the screenshot, "Edit" and "Delete" wouldn't be options for that post.

Also - my screen is 1920x1200 pixels, and I had to scroll two full screens+, so in reality only the first screenshot was taken 1 second after the post (unless the poster has WQXGA); the other screenshot(s) had to have been taken subsequently and stitched together in photoshop or the like.

Source(s): Same as "mikeyjam..."

[–]mrcarson2[S] 42 points43 points ago*

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Here is the story: My cousin is an avid yahoo answers user, he wrote this and posted it on facebook for his friends to see. I have been wanting to post it to reddit, and I just so happened to do it today. There were multiple screenshots and I stitched them together in photoshop to create one long image. BAM!

[–]m741 8 points9 points ago

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There are avid Yahoo Answers users?

[–]Haiavaha 11 points12 points ago*

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I used to be one. At first, I thought I would just make fun of everyone subtly, masking it behind seemingly genuine posts. This, of course, was too easy. So then I tried forcing myself not to be passive aggressive. This was a great deal harder.

I gave up.

[–]S7evyn 2 points3 points ago

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You use a spice weasel to manipulate images?

[–]bruinhenryd 7 points8 points ago

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damn, foiled again by the NightGolfer!

The NightGolfer uses screen resolution inspection, photoshop stitching knowledge, EXIF data analysis, as well as a host of other investigative tools to daringly expose OTHER people with nothing better to do...

[–]chiggers 5 points6 points ago

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There are tons of extensions for Firefox that will allow you to take a screenshot of the entire page (yes, even the non-viewable portion).

here's one, although there are others

[–]quiller 1 point2 points ago*

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the other screenshot(s) had to have been taken subsequently and stitched together in photoshop or the like.

There are half a dozen Firefox extensions that can take a screenshot of the whole page, sans Photoshop, no matter how long it is and export the whole thing to a range of popular image formats.

Your first point is very astute, however.

Edit: Quote and emphasis added for clarification.

[–]SamHealer 1 point2 points ago

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His second point is also correct - look at the username of the person before the awesome answer.

[–]quiller 1 point2 points ago*

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Oh, he's definitely correct that this image was created through multiple screenshots. However, NightGolfer said the other shots "had to have been taken subsequently" which is not true (as they could have been taken in one go, with the correct tools).

I think it's fair to add a <pedantic> disclaimer to my initial post (and this one).

[–]moogle516 4 points5 points ago*

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I wish people who do these would wait a reasonable amount of time or photoshop before doing the screencap and posting it here. I don't want my nice little delusional fantasy world being ruined.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points ago*

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at·ten·tion whore |əˈtɛn(t)ʃən hɔ(ə)r|

noun

1 a derogatory term used for performers by those who are jealous of that performer's exposure : the jealous teenager used a reddit comment to call the author of the humorous comment an attention whore.

[–]uncreative_name 4 points5 points ago

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Most people just don't really commit to a joke like you do. Kudos [upvotes] for the extra 15 seconds to dictionary.com two words.

[–]starcow 5 points6 points ago

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Way to burst my bubble

[–]ohnoihavenoname 2 points3 points ago

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Dude just wishes he was Van Wilder.

[–]jones77 5 points6 points ago

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Well Boohoo.

[–]soar 2 points3 points ago*

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Lolz, take a chill pill d00d. It was worth the lol I gave it!

Bam! Problem solved!

[–]supaphly42 1 point2 points ago

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I like attention whores... they usually dress slutty.

[–]birdmanjeremy 1 point2 points ago*

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Who cares, that shit is hilarious

[–]snead 11 points12 points ago

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Wow, it's like a retarded version of the LSAT.

[–]amnezia 2 points3 points ago

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thats the first thing that came to my mind as well

[–]roger_ 50 points51 points ago*

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Damn, at first I read the title as "Teenage Mutant Relationship Advice".

[–]facilis 38 points39 points ago

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"Well you see trever dude, sometimes you just gotta karate chop the pussy"

[–]skinnedmink 27 points28 points ago

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Relationships in a half-shell!

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

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Player power!

[–]busfahrer 76 points77 points ago

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I think Yahoo! Answers is 4chan with a different stylesheet.

[–]mitchandre 3 points4 points ago*

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4chan is that crappy these days...

[–]uncreative_name 14 points15 points ago

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Psst! We don't admit to lurking 4chan when we're on reddit. Just an FYI...

[–]topsul 53 points54 points ago

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The entire "Your name is Trevor" was priceless.

[–]thephotoman 17 points18 points ago

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This kid doesn't sound like a stranger to love. He knows the rules, and so do these girls. A full commitment's what he's looking for. The girls wouldn't get this from any other guy. He just wants to tell them how he's feeling. Don't tell me you're too blind to see.

[–]netzdamon 8 points9 points ago

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You always go with the slutty one.

[–]HydroCabron 28 points29 points ago*

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I must concur. Having twice, in my long-ago youth, chosen the fair and earnest young lady in lieu of the wild, wanton, and concupiscent, yet obviously unfaithful bawdy girl, I lived to regret my choice both times. After the ardor had cooled, the reserved and chaste girl always turned out to be a princess with a high self-regard, little interest in sex, and little skill therein, yet with an immense degree of entitlement and condescension.

I should have made hay with the lustful and inconstant ones, and forsaken the careful, self-respecting girls, who are just duds anyway.

Hell, your romances almost certainly won't last, so grab the one with the bedroom skills and keep your condom on tight. They're all interested in gaining social position -- and impressing their female friends -- by showing off the men they sleep with, but the sluts care less than most, which means your chances at sincere, honest interaction are paradoxically higher with the slut. And the chaste, modest girls are simply pretending to you, and perhaps to themselves, that they take their romances so much more seriously, and have much higher standards than that slut Allison who lives down the street.

Sluts of my past, I salute you! Time for a slut appreciation day. Acknowledge the role that sluts play in society, and celebrate their ability to cut through the bullshit and enjoy themselves.

[–]RKBA 7 points8 points ago

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Damn. That's the best, most well written, literate, prose containing more sage advice and wisdom than I've ever seen yet in my two years at reddit. Now I'm off to figure out how to submit it to "Best Of". On the other hand, it might have something to do with all the cannabis laced candies I've been consuming today to allay the vomiting that would be certain without them or their equivalent, since this is my chemo injection day.

[–]CowboyDan 23 points24 points ago

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BAM, problem solved.

[–]mootchell 7 points8 points ago

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It's called teamwork, Trevor.

[–]Jim_in_Buffalo 8 points9 points ago

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I thought it was going to turn into a recitation of "88 Lines About 44 Women" by The Nails.

[–]JasonDJ 5 points6 points ago

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That song is on my MP3 player, and I've only heard it once. And that once was on my MP3 player. Really, I have no idea how it got there.

[–]jambajews 4 points5 points ago*

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Alice was a giving soul,

Left you songs and licked your pole.

[–]xlance 5 points6 points ago

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Is this a new viral for yahoo or something?

These appear everywhere nowaydays.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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channers got bored.

[–]bagelfish 6 points7 points ago

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Vanessa cus shes slutty. Nice.

Also the first poster thinks he should go out with "becca defiantly". Oh lord. Too good.

[–]slaphappyhubris 6 points7 points ago

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He should "defiantly" date someone who doesn't want to date him

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points ago

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This reminds me of that "Who Owns the Zebra" puzzle from 6th grade math...

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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I loved those kinds of puzzles!

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–][deleted] 44 points45 points ago

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Defiantly, he chose Amber, Defiantly, he got ONNNNNNN DAT. He cares what no man says in regards to his choice. Defiantly, he chose with his heart. What one man chooses defiantly with his heart, let no other man part. Together forever those two - and don't you know Trevor would defiantly move heaven and earth, To be together forever with you.

[–]HydroCabron 19 points20 points ago*

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You defiantly said what I was defiantly thinking. Dog knows, you only loose when your not defiant about you're intention's. Its defiant principals that keep it's life real!

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]m741 15 points16 points ago

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The majority of Ambers chose that name when they became porn stars.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

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Wow, thanks for a days worth of eye strain condensed into 1 jpeg image. I was going to read a book for the rest of the day and now I can't see a thing.

[–]BusStation16 3 points4 points ago

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his horse was named friday!

[–]BlazinEurasian 4 points5 points ago

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Bam! Lets kick it up - ANOTHER NOTCH!

[–]bradlingdale 11 points12 points ago

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I hope this guy is 28 years old.

[–][deleted] 19 points20 points ago

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Get ONNNN DAT!

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

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This reads bizarrely like the logic problems we had to do in elementary school.

[–]swampsparrow 4 points5 points ago

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I think the Trevor thing is gonna catch on and in a few days we'll all be calling everyone Trevor, Trevor

[–]mackprime 3 points4 points ago

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any post on Y! Answers over 2 paragraphs seems to be a comedy post.

[–]32bites 8 points9 points ago*

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For those interested this is the page.

[–]waz67 8 points9 points ago

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You guys are all idiots. The guy posting the question is probably not going to marry any of these girls (nor should he), since they're too young to know what the hell they want out of life, so his purpose at this point should be to rack up the experience and just sleep with as many of them as he can, ideally all together but one at a time is fine too if that's all he can manage. So the thing to do is start with the one who will least likely sleep with him if he gets with any of the others, and work through them as many at a time as he can, with the biggest slut at the end. That is his mission. Get busy.

[–]tamrix 8 points9 points ago

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Rank up experience? What is this a MMO?

[–]EdSubPi 4 points5 points ago

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He needs to get his epic mount!

[–]thephotoman 6 points7 points ago

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Yes, it is. "IRL": the new MMO from the creators of the smash hit "Outside".

[–]Mr_A 2 points3 points ago

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I tried that once. The graphics were terrible.

[–]uxjackson 12 points13 points ago*

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You missed one very important point:

Trevor's age can't be determined by the fact that Becca can not date until she's 16. They're probably all 13-15, but Becca has stricter parents.

[–]SamHealer 4 points5 points ago

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Yes, because that bit about him being 18 or 36 was totally serious, much like the entire answer.

[–]thephotoman 4 points5 points ago

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Still, the worry of Chris Hansen and underage b& is quite valid.

[–]Phazon 2 points3 points ago

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Amber was the right choice.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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I was reminded of that long equation the professor was writing on the blackboard in (the original 50's film) "The Day The Earth Stood Still" reading that, it's so complex!

I remember having three girls interested in me once. I messed around and they disappeared and had to wait about five years to find another girl, it's like I was cursed!

[–]SicTim 2 points3 points ago

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Aaaaahhhh. This is like seeing an old friend.

Katie's boyfriend has been around a while. His character would not be an older man, it's a high school kid who keeps getting back together and breaking up with Katie. He also loves getting in fights, especially over Katie's honor -- which he never questions, no matter how many times she fucks some other guy.

And he always asks for advice, which brilliantly keeps the whole thing going with earnest answers about how to treat women, honesty and physical violence.

I normally wouldn't post a potential outing like this, but in light of the recent "best troll" thread here, I couldn't help but point out that this is a glimpse into the work of a maestro (or maestros, or an imitator).

[–]cricketsoda 2 points3 points ago

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Man I miss high school.

[–]starspangledpickle 4 points5 points ago

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Snort. I'd need Prolog to solve that fucking question.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

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Huh? What's that? More Yahoo answers?

/rolls over /snore

[–]lolbacon 4 points5 points ago

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well this is the story...

all about how your life got flipped turned upside down?

[–]petdance 6 points7 points ago*

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[–]yairchu 4 points5 points ago

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Why not a direct link?

[–]slipkid 1 point2 points ago

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Ugh... fuck word problems.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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Why don't you have a seat right there, over here

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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The answers on Yahoo are so lame, he should have tried 4chan...

[–]adlittle 1 point2 points ago

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Ugh, that looks disturbingly like the old Logic section of the GRE that is such a pain in the ass. If A sits next to X but not Q on a rainy Wednesday at this location, blahdy blah. Problem with being a social work student is I started trying thinking of them as people with thoughts and feelings...thank God for the essay and language sections.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]noamsml 1 point2 points ago

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This might have been funny, but I got bored reading the question halfway through the beginning.

[–]mercurysquad 2 points3 points ago

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"PIC" ?

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

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Arg I hate teens so much.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

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And they only become more petty and pathetic until after college.

[–]remccain 1 point2 points ago

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That's because they suddenly get bills they have to pay. Makes you grow up, bills do.

[–]scstraus 1 point2 points ago

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I agree with steve the stud.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago*

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Answer- fuck them all, date the homely chick cuz she will put up with it.