How to escape the f***ing Friend Zone (fixed!)

CleanBaldy · 2013-01-24T18:03:24+00:00

OK, this is how this is going to work:

The girls are going to press DO on everyone, to see what their friends are selecting.
When a DO-DO meets up, the guy replies "REALLY?!" She'll jokingly say, "Oh, I just clicked DO on everyone to see what others were pushing! LOL"
You're STILL in the friend zone, as she now selects which DO she wants to sleep with, besides you.
She knows you selected DO, so your friendship disappears.

MrChip · 2013-01-24T18:07:39+00:00

Or- be an adult and ask someone out

yukerboy · 2013-01-24T17:32:56+00:00

Click do on everyone.

No matches

Forever alone.

seansational · 2013-01-24T17:54:16+00:00

For some reason, I read dildo when I read the name, new idea,dildo app, moderates vibration function of phone (pulse,sustained,etc.) Monies.

PurdyCrafty · 2013-01-24T18:01:41+00:00

....doesn't this just propagate the problem further? Seems very grade school to me. Is it not just the equivalent of the grade school:

Do you like me? []yes []no []maybe

Perhaps I just don't understand what the deal is with a friend zone. I am typically someones friend before I date them because one can typically lead to another. To someone who is in the friend zone, can you explain to me what's stopping you from just asking? I'm not inquiring from a place of judgement but of understanding.

deerekaj · 2013-01-24T18:06:52+00:00

Installed your app. Clicked random female. Was presented with the option of....drumroll......my mom.

radcupcake · 2013-01-24T17:58:48+00:00

I find this super creepy.

HatesTheHivemind · 2013-01-24T18:00:38+00:00

Rage comics - Go to /r/fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu instead.

Read the rules.

ConchordianFlight58 · 2013-01-24T19:11:19+00:00

Dear internet:

Please stop using the term "friend zone" for the love of fucking god.

Plastastic · 2013-01-24T18:38:34+00:00

Or you could TALK TO THEM LIKE A NORMAL FUCKING HUMAN BEING!

MagicalOrgazm · 2013-01-24T18:39:58+00:00

smells like 9gag in here

RabbitRobotica · 2013-01-24T17:42:18+00:00

Or you could, you know, just leave the 4th grade and ask her out already.

hotsauce217 · 2013-01-24T17:28:33+00:00

As a man I can tell you, I will be hitting the do button every time.

sp00kyd00m · 2013-01-24T17:57:26+00:00

Fuck anybody who uses the term 'friendzone' unironically.

Crooooow · 2013-01-24T17:23:44+00:00

this is not funny

Zep_Rocko · 2013-01-24T18:06:35+00:00

Or you could just ask her out.

blackbellamy · 2013-01-24T18:07:03+00:00

The only way to escape the "friend zone" is to become the man that women want to fuck. Depending on where you are on the "friend" spectrum that could be a lot of work and effort.

If your mindset is that you can escape the friend zone by pushing some button on some app, then you're never getting out.

DreadedKanuk · 2013-01-24T18:28:48+00:00

"I really want to use this app because of le meme face!"

Is that I would say if I were fourteen years old.

Dick_Serious · 2013-01-24T18:18:55+00:00

Otherwise known as the "I'm a big pussy and too scared to ask a girl out" facebook app.

ananab · 2013-01-24T17:11:53+00:00

hmmm...what if someone wants to discover your true feelings, and intentionally hits date/do, followed by "jk, i don't feel that way about you...but now I know that you do, plus you didn't have the guts to say it to my face"

UGoBooMBooM · 2013-01-24T18:25:33+00:00

What made you think that a meme face infographic was a good way to market your app?

Loughla · 2013-01-24T18:43:20+00:00

This is not funny.

This is an advertisement.

Fuck off.

BardofDale · 2013-01-24T18:43:22+00:00

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/txsfx/guess_what_frienzone_is_over/ 8months ago.

_Woodrow_ · 2013-01-24T19:11:34+00:00

or, you could grow a backbone and join the rest of the human race

Not_A_Hipster_ · 2013-01-24T18:21:52+00:00

/r/funny is now a catch all for crap. Please go back to 9gag OP.

fouack07 · 2013-01-24T16:40:58+00:00

Oh and before you ask - we made this app just for fun and we make zero (like really zero) cent out of it.

dat_rhythm · 2013-01-24T18:21:43+00:00

This makes me sad for you guys who think this is a good idea. Especially cuz this doesn't mean you escape the friendzone... at all

Hazardhunter · 2013-01-24T18:26:20+00:00

Except, the "Do" button doesn't really obligate her to actually "do" him.

Edit: Or the other way around.

yourfacelikesme · 2013-01-24T18:42:13+00:00

This is basically the lazy man's OK cupid. Or plenty of fish. If you're just trying to bang chicks check out one of those sites. You might even find someone you like, and maybe will even find a date. Stop complaining about the "friendzone" and get interested in people who are interested in you. The friend zone is a mythical place, where unicorns cry because a chupacabra won't have it's children. They're two different species. Get over it, unicorn, and venture other places. Your horn can pierce the sky.

stuckwithme1039 · 2013-01-24T19:23:37+00:00

I can't be the only one that thought it was called Dildo, right?

platypode · 2013-01-24T16:40:41+00:00

Genius

Edina_Monsoon · 2013-01-24T18:12:26+00:00

No one is going to like me for saying this, but I want it said because it is the truth....

Girls don't dig passive aggressive guys because we ourselves tend to be passive aggressive. I know it takes a massive balls-gut combo, and it may ruin the friendship, and she may act like a weird cunt afterward, but if you want some manly-man respect, tell her you like her and (i know this is terrifying) grab her around the waist when you go out, and see if she doesn't come back to your cave and mayhap engage in crazy sex....seriously the worst thing that could happen is she could break out early b/c she's not interested or tell you she's not interested, which still takes you out of the dreaded friend-zone.

That being said, I understand there are some shy/socially-anxious people out there, so this app is great for them. I just worry it will immediately overrun by scumbag steves' trying to get their "do" on.

Also as I review this I realize I'm throwing quite the broad overview of women and their preferences...I recognize this isn't true of all women...good luck out there, it's a jungle.

pjhollow · 2013-01-24T18:21:25+00:00

I'm not a woman but, would you really want to go out with someone who

a) didn't have the balls to man up and ask you out?

or

b) had the balls, but didn't want to make the effort?

duck_billing · 2013-01-24T16:58:32+00:00

You are the shit because the do/dine solution.

UltraMegaMegaMan · 2013-01-24T18:06:44+00:00

Oh shitty viral marketing, there just aren't enough downvotes for you...

AngyFirebomb · 2013-01-24T16:47:11+00:00

I want a love potato. :D

massivelydinky · 2013-01-24T18:11:03+00:00

Thank you Archer for the idea, right?

Dbourbs · 2013-01-24T18:11:26+00:00

If I click do, and the person I clicked do about doesn't have the app, will they get an annoying notification like "Dbourbs said something about you on DiDiDo! Click here to find out what!"

softsoftfatfat · 2013-01-24T18:13:24+00:00

http://i.imgur.com/wNDLKbE.gif

mintyhippo93 · 2013-01-24T18:35:54+00:00

This already exists in a sense in an app called Tinder. It's already taking off pretty well where I go to college

RepostParrot · 2013-01-24T16:40:46+00:00

I'm not gonna lie... that's the best idea I've ever heard you come up with.

MrRabbit · 2013-01-24T17:32:01+00:00

You are taking "fixed" quite literally here!

Bravo on your efforts.

master_derp343 · 2013-01-24T17:56:42+00:00

Not sure if you're aware of the app Tinder, but it's essentially the same thing. Only on phones though, which definitely limits it. This is awesome, keep fighting for friendzoned people everywhere!

MUSTY_BALLSACK · 2013-01-24T17:15:09+00:00

I still wouldnt have the confidence to hit any of the buttons :..(

MadmanSalvo · 2013-01-24T17:53:56+00:00

I can see a slight, worrying flaw... What if someone went through and clicked "do" on everyone? then they know exactly what everyone thinks...

shieldsnotswords3112 · 2013-01-24T18:10:48+00:00

Dude your app doesn't work! It won't let me select a friend!

Nomsfud · 2013-01-24T17:09:58+00:00

You have literally just saved half the Internet from unwanted friend zoning. This app should qualify you, more than any other person achieving anything this past year, for a Nobel Prize, as well as the Guinness World Record for "Best Wingman Ever". I thank you on behalf of all people not getting any everywhere. Good work!

Jtelli9150 · 2013-01-24T17:55:10+00:00

There is an app for this already. Its called "Tinder." It doesn't find Facebook friends, but people who are located near you and around the same age. It should be called "Forever Alone" because nobody wants to like me. :(

buck_mcqueen · 2013-01-24T17:55:43+00:00

Pathetic

specialk16 · 2013-01-24T17:58:13+00:00

I can already see nobody matching any of my answers...

DWimaDerpologist · 2013-01-24T17:58:23+00:00

Also a great way to completely sabotage friendships by releasing everyone's answers unexpectedly like, a year from now...

I'm onto you....

kiddingcollege · 2013-01-24T18:00:45+00:00

Whoever made that either goes to MIT or stole the idea from people that do.

monkeyhopper · 2013-01-24T18:06:29+00:00

Wait. If there are only three options and he/she DOESN'T get a message, wouldn't he/she know that you picked one of the other two?

6inchpianist · 2013-01-24T18:06:40+00:00

Someone will now need to make one of those animal memes for confessing that they met their loved one by choosing "Do" when their SO chose "Dine".

imward · 2013-01-24T18:07:06+00:00

I was going to talk about how dumb this was and that you should just straight up talk to people, but then I got distracted checking my OkCupid account...ladies

aLittleCreepy · 2013-01-24T18:07:21+00:00

You should add some mass-send feature. I need this. Also the possibility to choose ditch if they take dine.

Buddhainhair · 2013-01-24T18:07:54+00:00

itt: "do"

Want_the_JOJ · 2013-01-24T18:10:18+00:00

what's to stop me from just hitting do on everyone, to see who would do and dine me

cheezeburgericanhaz · 2013-01-24T18:11:35+00:00

Until someone picks DO for everyone just to see who picks it also and laughs at them.

Tfcarpenter · 2013-01-24T18:13:26+00:00

We HAVE to make this a thing that everyone uses!

ElyBoBelly · 2013-01-24T18:13:39+00:00

Sigh Time to tell all of fb all about the new creepy app.

hflol · 2013-01-24T18:14:15+00:00

Remove the stupid LE EPIC MEEMEES and maybe I'll care.

mmocco · 2013-01-24T18:15:29+00:00

I hate to be that guy, but another version of this has already been done ' http://www.gotinder.com/index.html

Rauol_Duke · 2013-01-24T18:15:50+00:00

I CAN'T FIND IT.sorry I'm upset..

conepuncher420 · 2013-01-24T18:16:08+00:00

I'm getting Facebook.

wmd2009 · 2013-01-24T18:16:17+00:00

Fuck yeah

Kabusabe · 2013-01-24T18:17:38+00:00

So...basically thankyourwank.com in app form?

Thinc_Ng_Kap · 2013-01-24T18:20:22+00:00

To be 17 again...

ilikecommunitylots · 2013-01-24T18:21:58+00:00

So... tinder?

lord_of_thunder · 2013-01-24T18:22:40+00:00

Apart from the fact that this isn't funny, anyone else paranoid parrot on this one?

nom_yourmom · 2013-01-24T18:24:31+00:00

"If only technology could provide a solution to me being such an immature pussy scared shitless of any sort of interaction with the opposite sex."

blastinonions · 2013-01-24T18:24:56+00:00

How does this work for those into same gender

rtota14 · 2013-01-24T18:25:29+00:00

There's an app called tinder...same thing basically.

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