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Jerry must love his job. (imgur.com)

submitted ago by TrevBot33

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[–]sammmwise 59 points60 points ago

This also looks very much like a Latino Jerry Gergich (from Parks and Rec)!

[–]scartol 33 points34 points ago

Dammit, Jerry!

[–]HamburgerU 6 points7 points ago

God, Jerry, can't you do anything wrong?

[–]sweens90 4 points5 points ago

Jerry's Fault! Jerry's fault!

[–]ReddiDude 21 points22 points ago

It's actually Garry, but nobody gives a shit. That's why he's also never invited to Jerry Dinner.

[–]ShowMeUrrGenitals 12 points13 points ago

I'm allergic to sushi, every time I eat more than 80 sushis I throw up.

[–]holden-magroin 6 points7 points ago

If he's anything like Jerry Gergich, then he has an EXTREMELY large penis.

[–]LyingPervert 109 points110 points ago

Believe me, he does. I'm the Head Deliverer. The benefits are great.

[–]CommonWaveSounds 8 points9 points ago

i see you everywhere, always up to your perverted antics.

[–]atwoslottoaster 4 points5 points ago

I think charities must keep track of their head givers, for obvious reasons.

/r/shippingdrivers might like a xpost, we interact with head recievers all day long!

[–]Maeby78 2 points3 points ago

I bet you do...

load more comments (8 replies)

    [–]PandaCookies 37 points38 points ago

    God, I love HEB!

    [–]BanditoRojo 11 points12 points ago

    Fajitas and I don't even need to cook them myself? Just throw them in the microwave? Brilliant!

    [–]cheetofingerbang 0 points1 point ago

    I wanted to say that... dang it.

    [–]beefybear 150 points151 points ago

    HEB, the only thing I miss about Texas.

    [–]kyoutenshi 91 points92 points ago

    No love for Whataburger?

    [–]SuperFreshMoose 123 points124 points ago

    On my fist visit to Texas, I went to a Whataburger. As I got to the drive-thru window to pay for my burger, the guy said, "you ain't from around here are you?". I assumed he picked up on my "New Yorker" accent so I replied, "no." The biggest grin appeared on that guys face and he said "you sir, are in for a treat, the burger is on me." By far my best experience traveling out of state.

    [–]TiGeRpro 25 points26 points ago

    Wait Whataburger is only in Texas? Shit, I think I'll die without my weekly fix of Whataburger and Shipleys if I ever move.

    [–]ta481 26 points27 points ago

    Arizona here. Whataburger is here.

    Also, Shipley's? Really? They weren't even good. Local donut places were always better than Shipley's imo.

    [–]TiGeRpro 3 points4 points ago

    Only local donut place we have around me is called Yankee Doodles and their donuts are complete crap. TBH Shipley's isn't that great but I do love their glazed donuts.

    [–]imacultclassic 7 points8 points ago

    Shipley's is only good for their fake kolaches. so yummy.

    [–]lickwidforse2 0 points1 point ago

    Fake kolaches?

    [–]imacultclassic 0 points1 point ago

    yeah you know, the classic houston texas pig in a blanket styley kolaches. They aren't exactly traditional czech pastries.

    [–]lickwidforse2 0 points1 point ago

    Oh yea I like the pig in a blanket kolaches. I guess you're talking about like fruit kolaches?

    [–]imacultclassic 0 points1 point ago

    traditional meat kolaches are a little different. Where do you live? I could point you to some great kolache places. Although, i still love shipley's kolaches, and crave them now that I live outside the great state of texas.

    [–]ta481 -1 points0 points ago

    yuck, Shipley's kolaches were always dry imo. There were endless local donut places that made way better kolaches.

    [–]captain_stewart 1 point2 points ago

    Krispy Kreme, bitches

    [–]Nataku52 1 point2 points ago

    Little rock shipleys isnt a chain

    [–]ta481 0 points1 point ago

    okay, but you're in a thread about Texas. We're talking about the donut chain called Shipley's.

    [–]juxtaposition21 0 points1 point ago

    Local is always better

    [–][deleted] ago

    [deleted]

    [–]doooom 6 points7 points ago

    I always preferred Dunkin Donuts until I had a fresh, hot plain glazed Krispy Kreme. Nothing else compares.

    [–]coldskeet 1 point2 points ago

    Who doesn't like Shipley's? Shipley's is hands down the best glazed donut I've ever had!

    [–]Cumberlandspaceman 16 points17 points ago

    I disagree, round rock donuts is the best.

    [–]Guacamolium 6 points7 points ago

    I agree, Round Rock Donuts and HEB will be the only things I miss about Texas.

    [–]tahcos_baby 4 points5 points ago

    San Antonion here. Round Rock is the best around, but I myself being formerly from South Louisiana, can say with certainty that you haven't experienced glazed nirvana until you have had a Meche's Doughnut King doughnut. Shipley's can't even spell doughnut correctly, kolaches are ok.

    [–]CaptainSnacks 3 points4 points ago

    Try the Charlie Sheen at the Donut Hole in Lakeway. DELICIOUS

    [–]TheNitwon 5 points6 points ago

    I traveled all the way to Round Rock from San Antonio just to get two dozen donuts and a Texas Donut from Round Rock Donuts. It was worth every mile and every cent.

    [–]Cumberlandspaceman 5 points6 points ago

    I live in San Antonio and we take trips to Temple every few weeks to see family. Round Rock is on the way and we always stop by to get donuts. We buy in bulk too so we can have some on the way back.

    [–]refotsirk 1 point2 points ago

    Krispy Kreme HOT DONUTS NOW.

    [–]dancingcat 0 points1 point ago

    And they have a drive thru! :D

    [–]Tumblebumble 0 points1 point ago

    Mrs. Johnson's bakery on airport blvd in Austin has the best and fresh ass donuts

    [–]ta481 0 points1 point ago

    Never heard of this place, but I am intrigued. What is a Texas Donut? (dear god don't say jalapenos please)

    [–]TheNitwon 0 points1 point ago

    This.

    [–]pbsoccerboy 2 points3 points ago

    Round Rock liver here. I love dem donuts. They are a 7 minute drive. Very convenient.

    [–]Cumberlandspaceman 0 points1 point ago

    Lucky bastard.

    [–]pbsoccerboy 1 point2 points ago

    I am 2 miles away from it right now. :D

    [–]intheocean 0 points1 point ago

    Get a room you guys.

    [–]Cumberlandspaceman 1 point2 points ago

    Can I bang the donut?

    [–]walkthedog 1 point2 points ago

    To be fair, they always seemed similar to Shipley's.
    Super gooey and greasy.
    Godammit, I'm going to the bakery now.

    [–]gingadpole 0 points1 point ago

    Dude hell no. Krispe Kreme is the best and I'm from round rock. They aren't that great.

    [–]KillerBeeAcademy 2 points3 points ago

    For real. I went to high school in Round Rock and those yellow beauties got me through a stoned mornings.

    [–]bryanlharris 15 points16 points ago

    It began in Texas, corpus I think.

    [–]Japanistan 2 points3 points ago

    Yeah, pretty sure you're right. I've been to this large one in Corpus and its even got a statue of the creator sitting on a bench outside and it has souvenirs inside. It's two stories, bas a balcony, and is pretty nice.

    [–]bryanlharris 0 points1 point ago

    Yes I've been there once when visiting a friend. He told me his father worked "in the office" of whataburger, which I always assumed was that one.

    [–]Japanistan 0 points1 point ago

    I would've expected it to be bigger for some reason. I mean its already pretty big for a Whataburger but it's the first one ever made, right?

    [–]bryanlharris 0 points1 point ago

    Maybe. Or it could've been rebuilt at some point or relocated. It might not be the first, just the oldest, etc. Like Slackware.

    [–]khold 0 points1 point ago

    its even got a statue of the creator sitting on a bench outside

    Sure you're not talking about Selenas? :P

    [–]Japanistan 0 points1 point ago

    Selena isn't on the bench.

    [–]khold 0 points1 point ago

    Selena is all around us.

    [–]thepastyharlot 5 points6 points ago

    Whataburger lives in Louisiana too, I believe.

    [–]BanditoRojo 4 points5 points ago

    I've been out of Texas for 3 years and still go through Whataburger withdraws.

    [–]Kubaker1 2 points3 points ago

    And one in Florida.

    [–]panchothebeaner 2 points3 points ago

    Whataburger is now in more states http://www.whataburger.com/locations/

    [–]mgm666 0 points1 point ago

    New Mexico as well as Arizona have whataburger, as for Shipleys, no idea

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      [–]CaptainSnacks 0 points1 point ago

      There's a girl who is a senior in high school that owns 25% of the WHOLE CHAIN. So Westlake loves Whataburger!

      [–]beefybear 0 points1 point ago

      Love the SHIT outta whataburger.

      load more comments (16 replies)

        [–]ta481 29 points30 points ago

        Came here just to say this. I really miss their Central Market, too.

        [–]PaperDoll98765 7 points8 points ago

        Central Market is HEB too. It is their answer to Whole Foods.

        [–]phrz 4 points5 points ago

        In North Dallas, the two are neck and neck, and if you live there, you can feel the tension.

        [–]PaperDoll98765 0 points1 point ago

        I can imagine. I'm in the Austin area, Whole Foods headquarters is here so it is a little tense too.

        What I really love is HEB Plus. I did most of my Christmas shopping there. Got a Crock Pot, Thunder Cat PJs, a bunch of Hot Wheels, books, Christmas Karaoke CDs, and a picture of my son with Santa. It was awesome!

        [–]MooseKnuckle47 1 point2 points ago

        I prefer Central Market to Whole Foods, I just wish there was one closer to Cedar Park.

        [–]PaperDoll98765 0 points1 point ago

        Totally agree, I'm in Leander.

        [–]ta481 1 point2 points ago

        I know, that's why I said 'their' Central Market.

        [–]PaperDoll98765 0 points1 point ago

        Sorry, I missed that when I commented. Not intending to be mean or a know it all. Just read it before I had my coffee.

        [–]ta481 0 points1 point ago

        (:

        [–]Kubaker1 0 points1 point ago

        There's only a few of therm, though.

        [–]ta481 0 points1 point ago

        True, I lived in the suburbs of Houston and the closest one to me was in downtown, so I only went while I was down there for school.

        [–]CObacon 0 points1 point ago

        Lived three blocks from one in ATX miss it dearly, now that I live in Denver.

        [–]Imbuere 0 points1 point ago

        Yep. I never found something to compare to central market in Denver.

        I heard King Supers was going to do the Central market route. How'd that end up?

        [–]CObacon 0 points1 point ago

        Apparently, its called Fresh Fare, there is only one so far and it is outside of the city.

        [–]godofallcows 14 points15 points ago

        Mexican food sucks north of here anyway.

        [–]mfred01 8 points9 points ago

        Is that a Bowling for Soup reference? Because it sounds like one.

        [–]godofallcows 3 points4 points ago

        Of course!

        [–]mfred01 2 points3 points ago

        YES! No one ever knows what I'm talking about when I make them so I get excited when I find them in the wild.

        [–]juxtaposition21 2 points3 points ago

        Wild Bowler appeared. Wild Bowler used Soup!

        [–]Bronc27 3 points4 points ago

        Yes! Its laughable to see what other states call mexican food

        [–]Kubaker1 4 points5 points ago

        Taco bell is what they call it.

        [–]juxtaposition21 0 points1 point ago

        Taco KING is what I call it. Because its different (read: local) and better.

        [–]imacultclassic 11 points12 points ago

        Well good riddance to you then, sir. HEB doesn't miss you. Neither does blue bell, or any of the other things Bowling for Soup talks about in that damn song.

        [–]Imbuere 1 point2 points ago

        Mabye add: Bevo, central market, TCU girls, mighty fine in Austin / Kincaids in FW, lake Travis, and not dying on 35?

        [–]boirefish 0 points1 point ago

        Would hate to be the head provider

        [–]ddesla2 0 points1 point ago

        Definitely. I stayed with a friend in the woodlands for an Incubus concert out there. We went to HEB the following day to pick up food to grill and hang out by the pool. I got and subsequently cooked the best steak I've ever had in my life. Granted, it was expensive as shit but a 4 inch thick angus grass fed piece of cow made me immensely happy.

        load more comments (12 replies)

          [–]BanditoRojo 27 points28 points ago

          Harold E. Butts treats his employees generously.

          [–]buddaslovehandles 10 points11 points ago

          Good old Harry Butts.

          [–]Japanistan 8 points9 points ago

          HOWARD

          [–]Microfrost 2 points3 points ago

          *Howard E. Butt

          [–]Jacob_dp 4 points5 points ago

          Charles has been in charge of the company for most of it's existence.

          [–]Tuco_bell 17 points18 points ago

          Dammit Jerry!

          [–]BrownMofo 8 points9 points ago

          *Gary

          [–]Bogey_Kingston 4 points5 points ago

          Garry*

          [–]demgainz 9 points10 points ago

          Reminded me of:

          "It's not delivery, Its a porno!"

          [–]Dujen 1 point2 points ago

          hahah wat?

          [–]segman8 45 points46 points ago

          Upvote for H-E-B

          [–]ronnie87 1 point2 points ago

          Is that all you ever comment lately?! It's so hard to upvote you, my love.

          [–]segman8 1 point2 points ago

          I know!! I didn't realize it till after I already commented. LoL

          load more comments (5 replies)

            [–]jgaet45 3 points4 points ago

            Do you know who else loves his job? My mom!

            [–]themightypierre 2 points3 points ago

            Your mom's too busy with all the guys on x-box live.

            [–]BanditoRojo 0 points1 point ago

            Is your mom the head of his fan club?

            [–]Canucklehead99 2 points3 points ago

            No no no, fan of his head club.

            [–]robfurious 8 points9 points ago

            Is he moonlighting?

            [–]Cold_Burrito 7 points8 points ago

            Package manager

            [–]oky13o 3 points4 points ago

            Members get free wrapping.

            [–]Lilcheeks 0 points1 point ago

            Envelope and Box Licker

            [–]thebigspooner 3 points4 points ago

            Heh. Took me a second.

            [–]piccini9 3 points4 points ago

            Ron Swanson?

            [–]heruskael 6 points7 points ago

            I need this job.

            [–]HeraticAssassin 0 points1 point ago

            If you want it you're more than welcome to take it

            [–]kcamrn 2 points3 points ago

            Go ahead. Take it.

            load more comments (4 replies)

              [–]kchayar 2 points3 points ago

              He's wearing the same card in that picture. Headception?

              [–]dredawg 1 point2 points ago

              OMG I totally see a new comedy series with Ron Swanson

              [–]loganthegood 0 points1 point ago

              Just one of those job titles that doesn't need the first word. YOU'RE JUST A RECIEVER JERRY. Whatever that entails...

              [–]opensourcer 0 points1 point ago

              This job probably blows hard, big time.

              [–]Kilgore_Trout- 2 points3 points ago

              There's a reason it's only a headshot

              [–]Cumberlandspaceman 0 points1 point ago

              Now picture a penis head for the picture.

              [–]I_no_nazi 0 points1 point ago

              Josh?!

              [–]Typical-Reddit 4 points5 points ago

              I should grow a mustache.

              [–]heracleides 4 points5 points ago

              No.

              [–]pr1delol 4 points5 points ago

              reddit is on fire today

              [–]Nrocks 2 points3 points ago

              /r/im14andthisisfunny

              [–]Tatatee 2 points3 points ago

              Beat me to it. LOL ITS FUNNY BECAUSE IT SAYS HEAD XDDDD

              [–]stevo1078 1 point2 points ago

              Dunno why you're getting downvoted this is the very reason that subreddit was created.

              [–]ShadowRam -1 points0 points ago

              Out of the hundreds of stupid fucking posts in /r/funny (that somehow get upvoted)

              This is actually a funny one.

              [–]thedoogi 2 points3 points ago

              Get it? Because blowjobs.

              HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH

              [–]schniggens 1 point2 points ago

              Jobs are his job.

              [–]KingsEmpire 1 point2 points ago

              Head Job Coordinator

              [–]BanditoRojo 0 points1 point ago

              What good are head jobs without coordination? Consistency people, we are look for team players.

              [–]ManDen69 1 point2 points ago

              These comments are a little underwhelming, i'm going to pull a "Price is Right" and bet $1

              [–]AllAmericanWayne 1 point2 points ago

              Someone's gotta be Jerry. Might as well be Jerry

              [–]lbspredh 1 point2 points ago

              that depends, is he the head of receiving, or the receiver of head?

              [–]Otters4455 1 point2 points ago

              This can be read in two ways;

              1. He receives the head.
              2. He is the head of receiving...:/

              [–]BanditoRojo 1 point2 points ago

              In my mind they mean the same thing.

              [–]thepastyharlot -1 points0 points ago

              omg...i die!

              [–]mcaro 1 point2 points ago

              Most football teams would just call him the starter.

              [–]JAYCEECAM -1 points0 points ago

              Beats head giver any day.

              [–]mrfeuchuk -1 points0 points ago

              I kinda want to get this job just for the title.

              [–]unreal94 -1 points0 points ago

              You had One job!....oh dayum

              [–]mylifeisaLIEEE 0 points1 point ago

              I'd say he's a Hispanic Ron Swanson...but his name is Jerry.

              [–]coldskeet 1 point2 points ago

              Try HEB's cinnamon chip muffins. You can find them in the baked goods. One of my favorite breakfast foods of all time.

              [–]Cumberlandspaceman 0 points1 point ago

              I love those gigantic chocolate chip muffins there.

              [–]zaviex -1 points0 points ago

              Smile says it all

              [–]Arbpink34 -1 points0 points ago

              Looks like he does

              [–]Whynotzoidberg420 -1 points0 points ago

              That's one way to get a head

              [–]Datum -1 points0 points ago

              Requirements: - Certified Receiver

              https://sjobs.brassring.com/TGWEbHost/jobdetails.aspx?jobId=828869&SiteId=5375&PartnerId=25267&type=search&JobReqLang=1&codes=JB-INDD

              How do you get certified?

              [–]sethbobeth 0 points1 point ago

              HEB, In-n-Out Burger, Whataburger, Round Rock Donuts, and some great trees all within 20 miles of me. And you wonder why Round Rock is the fastest growing city in america...

              [–]humba -1 points0 points ago

              His real name is Garry. He just never corrected anyone on his first day.

              [–]crocodileheart -1 points0 points ago

              The face says it all.

              [–]APuppyWithATumor -1 points0 points ago

              How do I apply for this job?

              [–]jgaet45 -1 points0 points ago

              Yes.

              [–]robmcguire 1 point2 points ago

              I'll just leave this here

              [–]crichton101 0 points1 point ago

              Today we salute Jerry the Head Receiver, a real American hero. Jerry, this buds for you.

              [–]YourAssComfortsMe 0 points1 point ago

              Nah his job must really blow.

              [–]pineapple420 0 points1 point ago

              This is one of the few post i actually LOL'd

              [–]OnlyLaughsOutLoud 0 points1 point ago

              Lol

              [–]ribbledibble 0 points1 point ago

              Only Head Receiver job requirement: Must have mustache.

              [–]Haylyn221 0 points1 point ago

              Not sure if given head, or is the highest RECEIVER....

              [–]BADGERBORN 0 points1 point ago

              He has the stache'

              [–]Norse_of_60 0 points1 point ago

              Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

              [–]frigginelvis 0 points1 point ago

              I was the Receiving Department Head for the awful Home Depot for years. I would alternate between stating that my title was either Head Receiver or Back-end Supervisor.

              [–]ELsadPANDA 0 points1 point ago

              HEB!

              [–]terrydeaner 0 points1 point ago

              lol Any parcs and recs fans here?

              [–]MultipleSnoregasm 0 points1 point ago

              I've actually met a fair amount of head receivers (the real kind) and they're generally miserable people. It's a shitty job.

              [–]chiefthemaster 0 points1 point ago

              Wish i could visit texas..

              [–]eulersbitch 0 points1 point ago

              WHAT'S IN THE BOX?!?!

              [–]maddiepaddy223 0 points1 point ago

              i also shop at HEB/HEB plus. O.O

              [–]AlexanderCh 0 points1 point ago

              Nah, I reckon it blows.

              [–]ndhernandez 1 point2 points ago

              Yay! HEB! I love working there.

              [–]straylit 0 points1 point ago

              I worked at a grocery store and there was a guy who put "Randy Cox Back Door Receiver" on his name badge.

              [–]htown75 0 points1 point ago

              texas! fuck yea!

              [–]elliad 0 points1 point ago

              Looks kinda like a cross between Ron Swanson and Garry Gurgitch

              [–]nogoodnewb 0 points1 point ago

              Just came here to say I hate HEB. I wish Publix would come to Texas!

              [–]datnewnew -1 points0 points ago

              You never know who could be giving you head though...

              [–]kevt777 1 point2 points ago

              Well that also explains why he is smiling in the picture

              [–]dageekywon 1 point2 points ago

              Yeah. You would be smiling too if not only did you get it, but got paid for it :)

              [–]Sly_R 1 point2 points ago

              Eh, I heard it blows.

              [–][deleted] ago

              [deleted]

              [–]FAStalin 0 points1 point ago

              I would just keep putting pictures of Jerry Rice in there.

              [–]MitchTheTerrible -1 points0 points ago

              Man I wish I had his job, my job really blows.

              [–]Servare -1 points0 points ago

              so thats what Mr. Swanson has been up to

              [–]Japanistan 1 point2 points ago

              HEB!

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