There's definitely a part of me that thinks you're right. There's the other part that really loves her, though. She has no intention of us splitting up, in fact, the idea that we'd split up upsets her. She just goes to this incredibly stressed and fearful place when she thinks about marriage. She starts worrying about kids and starts worrying about what might happen if we change. They're in my opinion, unfounded fears, but I won't force a person into a position where they can't enjoy their own marriage. She understands that they are most likely unfounded fears, so she's seeking help to work through them.

There will come a time in the future, though, where if she doesn't come around, I'll have to be the bigger man and end it. I do truly love her. As a person, she is one of the best people I know. She feels like crap that she's putting me through this and really appreciates the fact that I'm letting her figure her stuff out. We are both financially stable and don't rely on each other for anything besides companionship. We've kept our identities while still building a strong relationship.

I asked her about the companionship, and if it was the only reason she was staying with me. If she was just afraid that she wouldn't be able to find someone else. She said no. I trust that she answered honestly and that in general her desire is for us to stay together for the rest of our lives.

To add to the issue, I believe she's currently dealing with some identity and depression issues. She works in an extremely stressful environment (lots of responsibility and plenty of competition) and is also pretty introverted in her personal life. She relies on me to keep her socially plugged in, which I don't mind being a more extroverted person.

I haven't gotten all of this out there before, so this was cathartic.