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Happy Birthday? (imgur.com)
submitted 1 month ago by DownTheHall1
[–]baconmeupscotty 1576 points1577 points1578 points 1 month ago
If you want to have a water birth, fine with me (wouldn't do it myself but, hey) but WHY ARE YOUR KIDS SITTING IN YOUR AFTERBIRTH STEW!?
[–]Sgt_Sweetness 826 points827 points828 points 1 month ago
What makes this worse is that sometimes women poop when they give birth so that might be in the water too.
[–]Jojoguy 825 points826 points827 points 1 month ago
Pooping while giving birth is actually a lot more common than one would think. Like scary common
[–]jpcrecom 817 points818 points819 points 1 month ago
yeah, it's not "sometimes they do", it's "sometimes they don't".
[–]Myungbean 223 points224 points225 points 1 month ago
hahah yeah, something on the order of 9/10 women take a crap giving birth.
[–]LaxeCas 147 points148 points149 points 1 month ago
in most cases they do enemas to them in hospital :D
[–]jrhoffa 726 points727 points728 points 1 month ago
Why are you smiling
[–]Howdy_McGee 447 points448 points449 points 1 month ago
Who doesn't like free enemas? That's like the only reason my friend gets pregnant anymore.
[–]StreakFreeShine 137 points138 points139 points 1 month ago
Trust me, you'll see it on the bill.
[–]okmkz 150 points151 points152 points 1 month ago
USA! USA! USA!
[–]adamomg 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
You would think they would just print out a new bill. Gross.
[–]yodamaster103 26 points27 points28 points 1 month ago
John Harvey Kellogg who was one of the founders of Kellogg cereals was an advocate of yogurt enemas
[–]hankharp00n 9 points10 points11 points 1 month ago
For more information check out Road To Wellville (1994) Stars Matthew Broderic in one of his good roles, and is generally about Kelloggs wackiness.
[–]mean0dean0 10 points11 points12 points 1 month ago
Yeah--not so much fun-wacky as psychotic-wacky. He pioneered the use of routine infant circumcision as a way to curb sexual impulses in boys, as well as promoting the burning off of clitorises of young girls with acid, and restraints that would give the genitals of "sufferers" of masturbation electric shocks so that they would associate sexual pleasure with intense pain.
[–]Schizoforenzic 11 points12 points13 points 1 month ago
Now that you pointed that out I'm cracking up. Upvote for you
[–]BatFace 27 points28 points29 points 1 month ago
My understanding is most hospitals stopped doing enemas unless you really really ask for it. It makes the woman uncomfortable which can delay birth.
[–]gestapolita 25 points26 points27 points 1 month ago
They no longer do labor enemas in US hospitals. You can do one yourself at home before going in, though.
[–]Hu_dat 43 points44 points45 points 1 month ago
Shit my water just broke. No honey we cant leave yet, I need to douche my asshole before we go.
[–]theruinator 7 points8 points9 points 1 month ago
Not so much anymore. My mom is a labor and delivery nurse, and she was quite upset when they were told not to do them in recent years. I'm guessing insurance didn't want to cover, but really, how much is an enema?
[–]TheAngriestBunny 19 points20 points21 points 1 month ago
It's not the enema you're paying for, it's the pay for the staff involved, including but not limited to, the IT people who work the computer systems that process the order, the pharmacist who outs the order in, the pharmacy tech who stocks the medicine cabinets, the nurses and doctors who administer it, and the people who clean it up.
Source: I work in a hospital.
[–]Frekavichk 16 points17 points18 points 1 month ago
Think of how much it normally is, then mark it up 10000% and that is how much it would cost.
[–]Tubal 34 points35 points36 points 1 month ago
I do enemas for around $15, which is street price. So a hospital would charge around $1500.
[–]TriceratopsBites 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
My L&D nurse sister told me they stopped doing enemas because the poop is going to come out either way. At least without the enema, the poo is solid instead of a spray/mist onto the nurses/doctor.
[–]like9mexicans 95 points96 points97 points 1 month ago
My kids mom pooped. When you can't feel down there from the epidural and your pushing -- a lot of stuff can come up, but mostly poop.
[–]Maeby78 48 points49 points50 points 1 month ago
Mostly poop? That makes it sound like pound for pound, more poop than kid.
[–]03Titanium 6 points7 points8 points 1 month ago
Well women don't poop so it's probably just all the years of backed up waste.
[–]N69sZelda 83 points84 points85 points 1 month ago
cute
[–]dirtyjersey84 36 points37 points38 points 1 month ago
about as common as poopin when you die....death and taxes and poopin
[–]turtlex 392 points393 points394 points 1 month ago
Insert joke about black twin brother
[–]jayboa 114 points115 points116 points 1 month ago
My friend was born with an erection, we like to tell him he nailed his mom.
[–]BingoBomb 91 points92 points93 points 1 month ago
Wat.
[–]Simple_avacado 285 points286 points287 points 1 month ago
HE SAID HIS FRIEND WAS BORN WITH AN ERECTION, THEY LIKE TO TELL HIM HE NAILED HIS MOM!
[–]Guns-Cats-andRonPaul 14 points15 points16 points 1 month ago
Also incredibly common.
[–]seanbyram 24 points25 points26 points 1 month ago
Seriously though. If being neck deep in vagina doesn't give you one, what will?
[–]might_be_a_troll 92 points93 points94 points 1 month ago
yeah, yeah, droppin' the cosby kids off at the pool
[–]_CitizenSnips_ 23 points24 points25 points 1 month ago
well fuck you're pushing down there for hours on end, of course some god damn poop gonna come out
[–]zombiezelda 13 points14 points15 points 1 month ago
I can confirm this.
Source: I pooped while giving birth, his dad saw it all and gave 0 fucks.
[–]bikeguy76 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
Well he gave you at least 1 fuck
[–]WillTheBeast 96 points97 points98 points 1 month ago*
Babies are actually born with their mouth facing their mothers ass to get some crap in the mouth. This is to kick start their gut flora.
*Edit. It's true. source 1, source 2 and source 3.
[–]ToXicXxX 123 points124 points125 points 1 month ago
Aha! I was born backwards! Legs first and loving it. So mom just shit on my dick.
[–]ballsandbutts 76 points77 points78 points 1 month ago
you just earned yourself a tag!
[–]Lilysmommy 33 points34 points35 points 1 month ago
I'm glad to say I did not poop while giving birth!
[–]N69sZelda 105 points106 points107 points 1 month ago
Congrats to you and lily.
[–]kayrynjoy 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
Me either! High Five!
[–]micahshell 38 points39 points40 points 1 month ago
BUT I THOUGHT WOMEN DON'T POOP. EVER.
[–]cleverusername404 34 points35 points36 points 1 month ago
Only during child birth.
[–]ballsandbutts 31 points32 points33 points 1 month ago
There must be a lot built up in there!
[–]Hermeran 15 points16 points17 points 1 month ago
Wow. I was happy before knowing this. If not happy, at least able to smile.
[–]Patroc1us 107 points108 points109 points 1 month ago
Just broth for tonight's soup.
[–]Sup_gurl 109 points110 points111 points 1 month ago
Thanks for that.
[–]DoctorMiracles 106 points107 points108 points 1 month ago
Here's some placenta recipes to go with the soup. WARNING don't click. I SAID DON'T CLICK.
[–]castlegreyskull 80 points81 points82 points 1 month ago
WHY DID I CLICK???????
[–]DoctorMiracles 80 points81 points82 points 1 month ago
I SAID DON'T CLICK.
[–]Tasgallxx 17 points18 points19 points 1 month ago
WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT, NOW I WANT TO CLICK.
[–]gosso920 4 points5 points6 points 1 month ago
You didn't say "Simon Says."
[–]vernscustoms 46 points47 points48 points 1 month ago
Risky click... worth it. Thanks for recipes
[–]mikkymikkymik 12 points13 points14 points 1 month ago
What the fuck did I not listen to you for.
[–]LaxeCas 14 points15 points16 points 1 month ago
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21RWUIFHD_s
[–]SpaceSick 64 points65 points66 points 1 month ago
The kid on the left's facial expression says it all.
[–][deleted] 1 month ago
[deleted]
[–]weaver2109 12 points13 points14 points 1 month ago
The one on the right looks like he just had a taste and liked it.
[–]pushthecharacterlimi 39 points40 points41 points 1 month ago
I think it's safe to say that is a placenta eating family...
[–]dirtyjersey84 20 points21 points22 points 1 month ago
some people think everything about their body is amazing and wonderful and it's "natural"...yea I don't see any other mammals going out of their way to do this
Health nut ego...they won't be so cock sure of their wacky bullshit when their kids get infected from birth filth...
[–]bionictom 26 points27 points28 points 1 month ago
yes, other mammals don't do that... they eat their afterbirth instead. Mammals and Tom Cruise.
[–]dirtyjersey84 18 points19 points20 points 1 month ago
they don't force their young into a bath full of poop and placenta...they eat the placenta themselves for nutrition because it's a wild animal that can't find food right after giving birth
[–]ChiefBromden 70 points71 points72 points 1 month ago
If you want to have a water birth...fine by me....but please, do so at a hospital, or facility with staff equipped to handle any complications. My wife is a NICU nurse and sees cases constantly where people fuck up royally, water births at home, and now their kid is pretty much brain dead. She just had another case this past week.
[–]bigolbabybaxter 478 points479 points480 points 1 month ago
this is the essence of this subreddit.
[–]Big_Dump 178 points179 points180 points 1 month ago
Yes it is. This is honestly one of the more disturbing things I've ever seen.
[–]AngeloPappas 42 points43 points44 points 1 month ago
This picture should be the background image for the sub.
[–]tomius 15 points16 points17 points 1 month ago
I nearly puke when I realized what I was seeing. Really. Shit, it's disgusting!
[–]Khephran 2 points3 points4 points 1 month ago
Shit
It wouldn't be so bad if that's all it was
[–]OnlyTimeWillTell 244 points245 points246 points 1 month ago
You know, I wanted a water birth for whenever I have children. Not so much anymore.
[–]ShallowBeThyGames 317 points318 points319 points 1 month ago
Have a water birth, just don't involve the whole family.
[–]RichardBachman 167 points168 points169 points 1 month ago
And don't fill a tub up to your neck. Above the waist is plenty enough.
So much wrong here....
[–]Nairb131 172 points173 points174 points 1 month ago
It probably was about that low until three extra people got it.
[–]uptwolait 92 points93 points94 points 1 month ago
That way none of the family members accidentally drown during the ceremonial sharing of the milk.
[–]phishroom 20 points21 points22 points 1 month ago
That really took it over the edge. You should be an honorary /r/WTF mod.
[–]tencents 6 points7 points8 points 1 month ago
Let's get it on..
[–]2pacsofgum 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
Oh boy...
[–]OnlyTimeWillTell 15 points16 points17 points 1 month ago
I will take your advice. I heard water birthday is soothing for the mother and baby so that's why I was so interested in doing one when it was my time to have children.
[–]blue_tardis 13 points14 points15 points 1 month ago
It is very nice, and the water makes the pain entirely manageable. I didn't want anyone in the water with me anyway, so this wouldn't have been an issue. My after-birth water wasn't nearly this bloody, maybe this woman tore a little bit? No regrets here, if I have another baby, it will be born in the water!
[–]alot_to_say 19 points20 points21 points 1 month ago
So my wife did a water birth 5 months ago. I still sometimes have flashbacks of the amount of blood during the whole process. Blood everywhere. And having a waterbirth at home, guess who cleaned it all up at 4 AM after already being up for nearly 30 hours?
I can still smell the blood. My wife hemorrhaged pretty bad after she was out of the bath and on the bed. Thank goodness for experienced midwives that knew what to do. Anyway, if anyone reading this decides to do a water birth or home birth, I recommend hiring someone else to clean up the blood. It was freaking everywhere.
I scrubbed for hours and was running the washing machine around the clock on "sanitize mode" with 185 degree water trying to get that iron smell out of all the clothes, sheets, towels, blankets, etc.
So the miracle of child birth was kind of a nightmare, but the child that come out is beautiful!!
[–]kovu159 5 points6 points7 points 1 month ago
This is what hospitals are for.
[–]critercat 41 points42 points43 points 1 month ago
My wife did a water birth. It was awesome. The water didn't look like that, though I wasn't in a hurry to get in it.
[–]pilotm 37 points38 points39 points 1 month ago
My wife birthed our second in a tub just like that. It was great. I didn't get in the tub, never saw a need.
Yes, but does the tub really get that bloody? Or will I be so overjoyed by having a baby that the blood won't matter?
[–]KindOldMan 72 points73 points74 points 1 month ago
You'd be amazed at what only a few drops of blood would do to water.
[–]ponimaju 175 points176 points177 points 1 month ago
nice try shark
[–]schmickers 13 points14 points15 points 1 month ago
Not usually. She is probably having a bleed. I was in the birthing pool with my wife for our first and third births, and it was nowhere near as bad as this picture. Catching your own baby is a pretty special experience!
[–]slayvelabor 138 points139 points140 points 1 month ago
at least none of their hair is wet..
[–]RenseBenzin 52 points53 points54 points 1 month ago
I remember how my brother always pushed me down when we were swimming. I hope he did not the same.
[–]angryPenguinator 39 points40 points41 points 1 month ago
That made me gag a little.
[–]angelpuff 22 points23 points24 points 1 month ago
siblings man! our family had a plastic kiddie pool in the backward periodically during the summer, and we would always just leave the water in for a couple weeks. during the hot days mosquito's lay their larva, bugs fall in and die, the water gets scummy, practically moldy. ANYWAY my sister dares me to dip a finger and lick it. (im like 10, she's 15). I'm bending down, and right after tasting it she shoves me so I fall in head first.
[–]LonelyNixon 2 points3 points4 points 1 month ago
Taste your new baby brother son
[–]Foxprowl 634 points635 points636 points 1 month ago
Throw some potatoes and carrots in there, you've got yourself a stew.
[–]Peaches666 199 points200 points201 points 1 month ago
Or let it chill overnight and you got Jello.
[–]angryPenguinator 131 points132 points133 points 1 month ago
With chunks!
[–]SQUID_FUCKER 217 points218 points219 points 1 month ago
http://i.imgur.com/sEXK6.gif
[–]Quick11 27 points28 points29 points 1 month ago
I want you to know I downvoted this because it actually made me vomit a little.
[–]Sup_gurl 125 points126 points127 points 1 month ago
That's it. I'm done.
[–]TheBearOfBadNews 63 points64 points65 points 1 month ago*
I like how hits the window frame.
[–]xyroclast 14 points15 points16 points 1 month ago
It's humorous but I'll bet it really hurt, for the stuntman
It also looks like his head very narrowly misses the top of the frame (I think it hits his hair... or maybe he hits his head, too)
[–]Berdiie 4 points5 points6 points 1 month ago
I wonder what the stunt glass is made of, perhaps it's the spun sugar they make for movie beer bottles.
[–]Goldentongue 2 points3 points4 points 1 month ago
Probably. Most broken movie glass is made of that. There are plenty of recipes online for it. It's pretty easy to make.
[–]garconmeansboy 20 points21 points22 points 1 month ago
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5lFZAyZPjV0
[–]Oh_Tricky_Dick 14 points15 points16 points 1 month ago
Whoa whoa whoa, there's still plenty meat on that bone
[–]mariannemao 7 points8 points9 points 1 month ago
There's a girl in my soup!
[–]dancinhmr 138 points139 points140 points 1 month ago
i... am... actually gagging...
when the kids grow up... and realize what the tub is actually filled with...
[–]Kiassen 96 points97 points98 points 1 month ago*
They can scrub and scrub, but it will all be in vain, for they will never feel clean ever again.
[–]choast 15 points16 points17 points 1 month ago
I pronounced 'again' very emphaticly in order to finish that rhyme.
[–]pencer 92 points93 points94 points 1 month ago
Where's the 20 years later pic?
[–]octopus_organs 127 points128 points129 points 1 month ago
murder / suicide pacts rarely warrant a good photo op.
[–]Br0dy 37 points38 points39 points 1 month ago
Here you go!
[–]Sophophilic 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago
There's a fairly long running documentary about it on Showtime.
[–]rob327c 211 points212 points213 points 1 month ago
Aaaahhhhhhh what the actual fuck!
[–][deleted] 246 points247 points248 points 1 month ago
Poor kid
[–]NoisyNeighbor 139 points140 points141 points 1 month ago
That's the day he ran away from home.
[–]angryPenguinator 54 points55 points56 points 1 month ago
I hope the circus has been good to him.
[–]MisterFDotCom 47 points48 points49 points 1 month ago
Twist: his circus trick is getting shat on.
[–]ukiyoe 36 points37 points38 points 1 month ago
"Don't cry, it wasn't so bad..."
[–]MisterDonkey 4 points5 points6 points 1 month ago
That plate would make a fine addition to my collection.
[–]Valxyrie23 20 points21 points22 points 1 month ago
his foot touched a bit of placenta
[–]N69sZelda 18 points19 points20 points 1 month ago
but thats gross. They were going to eat it later.
[–]Crimyote 8 points9 points10 points 1 month ago
Wait... is that the Dreamworks smirk?
[–]CakeSmasher 11 points12 points13 points 1 month ago
DO NOT FUCKING WANT!
[–]MHTLuca 39 points40 points41 points 1 month ago
First post in a long while to elicit a verbal response. Well done, OP.
[–]shhitgoose 39 points40 points41 points 1 month ago
That is fucking repulsive. Just wrong on so many levels:
-Family naked together in tiny pool; check
-Said tiny pool full of afterbirth, placenta, blood, and probably shit; check
-Mom creepily holding a clearly traumatized young son with boob contact; check
-Disgusting shit-rags on edge of pool; check
-Other son with blood/afterbirth splashed on face; check
-Whole family in marinating in afterbirth shit stew; check
[–]ekyrt 17 points18 points19 points 1 month ago
-Don't forget, 17 year old daughter taking this picture... :-/
[–]punnyverypunny 289 points290 points291 points 1 month ago
http://i.imgur.com/pKnRM.gif
[–]vertebrate 16 points17 points18 points 1 month ago
I like to think there's a fourth child, under water, fishing for chunks.
[–]haylstorm1020 6 points7 points8 points 1 month ago*
Your comment made me puke in my mouth a little.
[–]like9mexicans 46 points47 points48 points 1 month ago
AMA Request: One of the kids in that picture.
[–]3pinplug 11 points12 points13 points 1 month ago
Bit of a bloody mess, isn't it?
[–]Roommates69 67 points68 points69 points 1 month ago
What's in that tub? Are they bathing in wine or something? That baby's a little young to be so close to the water........really young.
Holy Fucking SHIT GET OUT OF THE TWATER!!
[–]CaughtMeALurkfish 21 points22 points23 points 1 month ago
Upvote for "twater."
[–]trampus1 10 points11 points12 points 1 month ago
AMA request: One of these fuckers, or the cameraman, or really anyone who can provide the answer to the question we all want to know.
[–]BlownUpByCreeper 21 points22 points23 points 1 month ago
are. are all of them naked?
[–]WeirdIdeasCO 7 points8 points9 points 1 month ago
Really? That's what disturbed you from the picture?
[–]iamasupersaiyan 25 points26 points27 points 1 month ago
http://i.imgur.com/zKBKH.gif
[–]akingkio 7 points8 points9 points 1 month ago
Quick kids get in the swimming pool, Mummies got a surprise!
[–]nightman2112 10 points11 points12 points 1 month ago
Ohh, ohh, I know this one! And then they all shouted;
THE ARISTOCRATS!!
[–]seabass341 22 points23 points24 points 1 month ago
The water taste iron-y!
[–]kleptomaniiac 284 points285 points286 points 1 month ago
Damn white folks are so fucking weird.
[–][deleted] 63 points64 points65 points 1 month ago
As a white folk, I can confirm we are fucking weird.
[–]loudQUI3Tloud 13 points14 points15 points 1 month ago
http://i.imgur.com/f6Fw0.gif
[–]tanzorbarbarian 65 points66 points67 points 1 month ago
I.......
I'm not sure this even warrants a response.
[–]gattofila 47 points48 points49 points 1 month ago
Too late. You already responded.
[–]kromyt 35 points36 points37 points 1 month ago
Enema before birth is seen as an unnecessary stress to place on the body now. It was mostly done to prevent embarrassment.
Even with an enema, the likelihood of passing fecal matter during birth is still there, especially if the labor is allowed to progress normally. If it is a long labor, the woman still needs to eat periodically to keep up her strength.
But think about the anatomy. That is a lot of pressure in the body, the muscles used for contracting are, in part, the same as for defecating, and you have a large, heavy object applying further pressure in a downward motion to the intestines. Of course poop is going to come out.
[–]vonriel 31 points32 points33 points 1 month ago
To be fair, regular birth is pretty damn disgusting. All parts of it. All the hormones and drugs and excitement tend to remove the ick-factor from it, though.
At least, for the parents...
[–]ASE3435 19 points20 points21 points 1 month ago
Holy smokes! I have seen a lot of gory stuff in WTF, but this one made me a little sick to my stomach.
[–]mr_Iister 40 points41 points42 points 1 month ago
I'm not looking for an internet fight about the matter, but a lot of smart people I've talked to about waterbirths don't seem to think its a great idea. I had one professor who was completely baffled by it. He worked with higher primates, like chimpanzees, and didn't see where people got the idea that having your baby in the water was a 'natural' thing. No prosimian, monkey, or ape will birth its child in the water. It has no history in the natural world of primates. None. Combined with the fact that ladies tend to poop during labor... I don't know but it seems like a good way to give your baby pink eye. Even if the midwife scoops the poop out, I still don't think the water is sanitary. What if she misses a piece because of the blood? What if you have some nasty bacteria in your gut and are now surrounded by it?
[–]tranquilpie 15 points16 points17 points 1 month ago
Exactly. No other mammals, other than whales, seek out water to birth. It's the exact opposite.
Another alarming thing, if you look around the web at water birthing photos a stunning number of babies are shockingly blue.
I just don't get it.
It is fascinating to see whales enter a large body of water in order to give birth, before returning to their natural home in the clouds.
[–]Phaquebzech 5 points6 points7 points 1 month ago
Kid on the left has the appropriate expression.
[–]Vulpine_Empress 4 points5 points6 points 1 month ago
The look on the blonde kid's face says it all.
[–]onlinealterego 7 points8 points9 points 1 month ago
What a bloodbath
[–]Nova178 4 points5 points6 points 1 month ago
The first pic to actually make me gag ob /r/wtf. Good job op
[–]Rectal_Fire 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
Creed knows what is up http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJvOuj_CUyY
[–]Sluhzer 4 points5 points6 points 1 month ago
What are they sitting in, coke? ...Happy Birthday? ...Oh
[–]Xilean 4 points5 points6 points 1 month ago
The phrase "broth of my loins" takes on new meaning here.
[–]Faulknersq 6 points7 points8 points 1 month ago
That's a phrase?
[–]beefcake87 6 points7 points8 points 1 month ago
The best/worst WTF pic I've seen in a while...
[–]gonnagetu 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
wow this really ruined my lunch... forever
[–]Ekhart 4 points5 points6 points 1 month ago
Psychotherapy for everyone!
[–]Turk-February 4 points5 points6 points 1 month ago
The next day on Craigslist:
"Inflatable pool for sale, only used once"
[–]slkwont 7 points8 points9 points 1 month ago
This will probably get lost, but that is most likely not afterbirth but a herbal bath, which is put in clean water. Supposedly it helps mom and baby heal.
Herbs that facilitate tissue repair: Plaintain, Palendula, Yarrow, Comfrey Leaf *If using comfrey, limit the use to 3 days.
Herbs that are astringent, tighten tissue, and decrease swelling: Uva Ursi, Manzanita, Yarrow, Witch Hazel, Oak, sea salt. * These herbs can be drying, so their use should not be long-term
Antiseptic Herbs to prevent infection: Lavender, Rosemary, Rose Petral, Yarrow>
[–]caustic_bear 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
The kid on the left, his expression is like " I know I know but what can I do?"
[–]CEE92 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
The kid on the left knows there's something fishy about his family, and it's not the smell.
[–]spamlizard96 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
http://i.imgur.com/TM9Bj.gif
[–]UnconfirmedCat 10 points11 points12 points 1 month ago
White people.
[–]youvegottabekittenme 6 points7 points8 points 1 month ago
In my time on the internet, I have seen countless people dying, decapitations, broken bones, shootings, 2 girls 1 cup, tubgirl, lemon party, gotse and all other forms of horrible things, but I can honestly say that none of them have brought me closer to actually throwing up than this picture. What the fuck.
[–]Captian_Cocksmith 1 point2 points3 points 1 month ago
Oh my fuck!
[–]sadsadsadist 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
This is one of the first photos that has actually skeezed me out in a long time. Thanks for that, I haven't had that feel.
[–]Xmas456 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
As far as "wtf's" go, this is a crowning achievement
[–]LelRathlor28 1 point2 points3 points 1 month ago
The title should be
The Birth of Michael Phelps.
[–]Lillipout 50 points51 points52 points 1 month ago
Water birthing, an unconventional and somewhat controversial birthing technique. Participation by the whole family is encouraged, so this is not that unusual in this context.
[–]junppu 100 points101 points102 points 1 month ago
Family participation is encouraged to a certain extent, I'm sure that bathing in your mothers birthing fluids is frowned upon in most places.
[–]Jibblers 100 points101 points102 points 1 month ago
This takes pissing in the pool to whole 'nother level.
[–]ErrorlessGnome 20 points21 points22 points 1 month ago
Yes, but do the children get to bite through the umbilical cord? Because them NOT doing that, now that would be unusual.
[–]sudo_rossy 43 points44 points45 points 1 month ago
My wife had a water-birth. Never knew participation was encouraged. No way was I getting in that pool!
It was fascinating as hell to watch, and a little heart-wrenching that her first 20 or 30 minutes of life she was struggling to breathe (she's fine now).
Then my wife stood up and the placenta fell out. All over my drink.
End Anecdote.
[–]MisterFDotCom 23 points24 points25 points 1 month ago
How did she stand up so high that her placenta fell out of her va-jay-jay into a drink. Was there a drinkholder in the tub? Who puts a drink there? What it in your hand? Why was your hand so low? When you say "all over your drink" do you mean it splashed?
[–]sudo_rossy 10 points11 points12 points 1 month ago
She was getting out of the tub, and I didn't have my drink in my hand, it was resting on the floor.
It fell out onto the floor, but the splash of blood went Everywhere. It's easily the most amount of blood, or any bodily fluid I've ever seen. I even got a spot or two on my shoe. And I was stood across the room.
[–]DoctorMiracles 28 points29 points30 points 1 month ago
'I don't always let go of my drink, but when my wife is having a water birth, I leave it on the floor'
[–]sudo_rossy 4 points5 points6 points 1 month ago
The labour lasted 6 days. We'd had very little sleep in that time, I was so tired I made a lot of stupid decisions during that time!.
[–]saucycraftster 2 points3 points4 points 1 month ago
your baby struggled to breathe for 20 or 30 minutes after birth?? Did you mean seconds? The placenta / umbilical cord is still attached (and usually still chugging oxygen). If your baby needed resuscitation at birth, monitoring of the heart tones right before the birth should have necessitated getting out!
It is true that waterborn babies transition to breathing a bit slower (45 seconds to a minute) than land born babies. This is from the warmth of the water on them and on their cord, reducing the need for them to breathe immediately (like when the cord is cut right at birth, it cuts off all their oxygen so they HAVE to take a breath right away)
A baby that struggles to breathe for 20-30 mins after birth had some serious stuff going on right before the birth that should have never been allowed in a waterbirth.
[–]FrisianDude 13 points14 points15 points 1 month ago
Huh? Why is it encouraged that the older children have to be there?
[–]bigfig 12 points13 points14 points 1 month ago
Rejecting one silly convention (1950s style birthing) does not guarantee that the polar opposite concept is wonderful.
[–]idlefritz 8 points9 points10 points 1 month ago
We had to post a "no placenta" sign on the employee refrigerator at the naturopathic medical school I worked at for just this sort of context.
[–]DrWafflestein 7 points8 points9 points 1 month ago
I thought this was a bath tub full of jelly, then I saw the baby and I threw up a little in my mouth.
[–]kwal319 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
Maeby's birth!
[–]RyuKenya 2 points3 points4 points 1 month ago
plot twist- the two boys have peed in that water!
[–]occasionallyamused 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
I find this picture one of the most disturbing images I have seen on WTF.
[–]hairslime 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago
proper wtf. bout time.
[–]1985jack000 2 points3 points4 points 1 month ago
This is the first "literal" bloodbath I have ever seen.
[–]ReiganKenji 2 points3 points4 points 1 month ago
WHITE PEOPLE ARE GROSS THIS IS HOW PEOPLE GET INTO SHIT PORN.
[–]eastriverdrive 4 points5 points6 points 1 month ago
white people are weird
all it takes is a username and password
create account
is it really that easy? only one way to find out...
already have an account and just want to login?
login
π Rendered by PID 28692 on app-135 at 2013-01-22 11:17:44.448190+00:00 running f40af60.
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