this post was submitted on
1,303 points (55% like it)
6,468 up votes 5,165 down votes

funny

subscribe2,777,246 readers

9,163 users here now

NEW! No gore or porn (including sexually graphic images). Other NSFW content must be tagged as such


Welcome to r/Funny:

You may only post if you are funny.

Please No:

  • posts with their sole purpose being to communicate with another redditor. Click for an Example.

  • Screenshots of reddit comment threads. Post a link with context to /r/bestof or /r/defaultgems if from a default subreddit instead.

  • Posts for the specific point of it being your reddit birthday.

  • Politics - This includes the 2012 Presidential candidates or bills in congress. Try /r/politicalhumor instead.

  • Rage comics - Go to /r/fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu instead.

  • Memes - Go to /r/AdviceAnimals or /r/Memes instead.

  • Demotivational posters - Go to /r/Demotivational instead.

  • Pictures of just text - Make a self post instead.

  • DAE posts - Go to /r/doesanybodyelse

  • eCards - the poll result was 55.02% in favor of removal. Please submit eCards to /r/ecards

  • URL shorteners - No link shorteners (or HugeURL) in either post links or comments. They will be deleted regardless of intent.

Rehosted webcomics will be removed. Please submit a link to the original comic's site and preferably an imgur link in the comments. Do not post a link to the comic image, it must be linked to the page of the comic. (*) (*)

Need more? Check out:

Still need more? See Reddit's best / worst and offensive joke collections (warning: some of those jokes are offensive / nsfw!).


Please DO NOT post personal information. This includes anything hosted on Facebook's servers, as they can be traced to the original account holder.


If your submission appears to be banned, please don't just delete it as that makes the filter hate you! Instead please send us a message with a link to the post. We'll unban it and it should get better. Please allow 10 minutes for the post to appear before messaging moderators


The moderators of /r/funny reserve the right to moderate posts and comments at their discretion, with regard to their perception of the suitability of said posts and comments for this subreddit. Thank you for your understanding.


CSS - BritishEnglishPolice ©2011

a community for

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

all 113 comments

[–]sapienshane 139 points140 points ago

I think he did that on porpoise.

[–]uptwolait 44 points45 points ago

Aaaand this pun thread is finished.

[–]stellareddit 50 points51 points ago

Whale that was quick.

[–]zbr13 28 points29 points ago

I sea what you did there

[–]muffinmonk 22 points23 points ago

this pun thread blowholes.

[–]meantforamazing 18 points19 points ago

You don't have to be such a beach.

[–]Whos_that_guy 50 points51 points ago

Dolphin

[–]csh8428 3 points4 points ago

He should get a cetacean for illegal contact.

[–]ryancarpenter 1 point2 points ago

I'm urchin for this to be overwith...

[–]Un0rigin4l 2 points3 points ago

I died at this point and never continued. Thank you.

[–]FunFalseFact 27 points28 points ago

Fun fact: Dolphins are intelligent enough to have "games" that they play, one of them is a form of tag. This is a great example of it.

[–]deafandpissed 31 points32 points ago

So when the bully punched me in school we were just playing tag? Self-confidence restored!

[–]TheOneTW 29 points30 points ago

Another fun fact: Dolphins are the rapists of the sea.

[–]temetys1 2 points3 points ago

Yeah it's all fun and games till this happens

[–]Lettuce_Get_Weird 10 points11 points ago

[–]Lycist 6 points7 points ago

I encounter so many odd coincidences.. As soon as I opened that picture, The episode of stargate sg1 that I was watching (season 1 episode 7) made a sound almost identical to sounds a dolphin makes..

[–]Rangourthaman_ 0 points1 point ago

source for those so inclined: http://drmcninja.com/newreaders.php

[–]lexyjane 12 points13 points ago

I can't not read "Dolphin Punch" like "FALCON PUNCH".

[–]HolographicMetapod 2 points3 points ago

Dolphin, PAANCH.

[–]Fordiman 3 points4 points ago

Dalphone PAANCH

[–]Ghost17088 0 points1 point ago

I can't unhear it now...

[–]ross5781 1 point2 points ago

Thank you, I cannot believe this did not show up earlier than it did

[–]GearsofPinata 40 points41 points ago

[–]autodidact89 -1 points0 points ago

Err, I'm pretty sure this was made to rag on people who complain about reposts. I'm not sure which side you are on.

[–]GearsofPinata 0 points1 point ago

I'm not sure you're interpreting it correctly.

[–]shoebob 0 points1 point ago

That's fucking fantastic, thanks!

[–]hapaxLegomina 48 points49 points ago

Twenty eight reposts. People just love watching dolphin on dolphin violence.

title comnts points age /r/
Here, let me help you a little. 1com 72pts 19dys gifs
What a JERK! [Animated GIF] 171coms 652pts 1yr funny
Dolphin Puuuunch!!! 1com 12pts 21dys aww
Dolphin Puuuuunch! 1com -3pts 21dys gifs
What happens every time someone tells me to "Go with the flow". 18coms 812pts 24dys funny
wombo combo!! 0coms -1pt 1mo GifSound
Dolphin Combo breaker 0coms -4pts 1mo GifSound
When I want to make a comment on a post and someone else already said it. 0coms 17pts 2mos funny
Troll Dolphin 32coms 269pts 3mos gif
Stephan Feck playing with the pro's 1com 32pts 3mos gifs
one of the top gifs of this era 1com 12pts 4mos gifs
Steve never was very graceful 3coms 31pts 4mos gifs
FUCKAH YOU DOLPHIN!! 15coms 183pts 5mos gifs
My favorite animal gif! Feel free to post yours 12coms 87pts 5mos funny
This is how I feel posting on my first reddit birthday 4coms 13pts 6mos funny
Not always graceful 52coms 421pts 7mos funny
BooP 1com 2pts 7mos aww
BOOP 0coms 11pts 7mos gifs
boop 178coms 809pts 7mos funny
1 fail. They never showed up again. 24coms 268pts 8mos funny
Dolphins Crash in air 19coms 117pts 9mos funny
Fail Trick 6coms 19pts 1yr funny
C-c-c-c-ombo breaker!! 161coms 654pts 1yr funny
C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER 5coms 12pts 1yr pics
Dickhead Dolphin 82coms 508pts 1yr funny
C-C-C-Combo Breaker! [GIF] 302coms 2067pts 2yrs funny
Scumbag Whale 3coms 9pts 17dys funny
Scumbag Whale 69coms 329pts 1yr funny

source: karmadecay

[–]Cemo9999 7 points8 points ago

So, most reposts of the year?

[–]hapaxLegomina 0 points1 point ago

I wish. I saw a post with so many reposts that Karma Decay wouldn't list them all on one page.

[–]teshyyb 6 points7 points ago

WOMBO COMBO!!!!

[–]Harreboi 3 points4 points ago

Im glad someone did this, seeing my own post here is kinda sad though

[–]hapaxLegomina 0 points1 point ago

Haha that is so sad. :) Have an upvote.

[–]_pumpkinpies 14 points15 points ago

I have to say, I've never seen this gif and it was also the only one in a long time to make me laugh out loud. Personally I'm glad it was reposted.

[–]AzMoo 3 points4 points ago

I've seen it about 50 times over the years, but who cares? It's still awesome.

[–]hapaxLegomina 1 point2 points ago

Really? It's been all over Reddit and all over Tumblr. You dodged a bullet. A bullet made of dolphins and happiness.

[–]A_GZA 1 point2 points ago

"OP" just got lit up

[–]fawker 2 points3 points ago

this repost brought to you by karmadecay.com

[–]Battou62 4 points5 points ago

SHORYUKEN !!!

[–]motorhead84 1 point2 points ago

Damnit!

[–]massiveCan 0 points1 point ago

You beat me to it as well. Well played sir +1

[–]Dovakla 2 points3 points ago

♫"So long, and thanks for all the f-OH GOD MY FACE"♫

[–]egores_house 4 points5 points ago

"so long and thanks for all the-FUCK"

[–]Munt_Custard 1 point2 points ago

Well that's dolphins for ya, just fuckin' and raping everything. At least they thanked us for it.

[–]Barnopottamous[S] 0 points1 point ago

I was waiting for someone to do this. Thank you.

[–]skithehoop 0 points1 point ago

Bo0p.

[–]REDBULLgivesUupvotes 0 points1 point ago

There was clearly a Titleist lodged in his friend's blowhole. He was just preforming the dolphin Heimlich.

[–]batdorf 0 points1 point ago

it's how they play tag.

note to ocean going humans - avoid games of tag with dolphins.

[–]another_old_fart 0 points1 point ago

I would have said Dolphin Fail. I bet dolphins occasionally screw up just like cats.

[–]mcparker73 1 point2 points ago

In all seriousness, could those dolphins be seriously injured from this?

[–]Sweetmilk_ 0 points1 point ago

Dolphins can kill sharks this way, so yes that dolphin probably took a while to recover.

[–]digbus 1 point2 points ago

I fell off my dinosaur the first time this was posted.

[–]filterspam 1 point2 points ago

Haha that's very funny but the dolphin who's lung was ruptured probably didn't think so in the long cold trip to the bottom as he was crushed like an egg.

[–]werkahaulik94 0 points1 point ago

Dolpho pawnch!

[–]ThnkWthPrtls 1 point2 points ago

"Dammit, Greg! We rehearsed this! You come in in front of Mark!"

[–]cuttthebutt 0 points1 point ago

My given name is Dylan Dolphin.. and I support this message.

[–]ThnkWthPrtls 0 points1 point ago

Also, I love that the link is part of a gallery titled "Animals Being Dicks". Seems appropriate for the context lol

[–]Munt_Custard 1 point2 points ago

You should check out www.animalsbeingdicks.com you might enjoy it. This GIF is the very last (or first depending on how you view it) one on the site.

[–]future_dolphin 0 points1 point ago

I approve.

[–]ideal2545 0 points1 point ago

i've seen this so many times here on reddit and each time I get a laugh.

[–]Justice502 0 points1 point ago

Seriously doubt it got hurt.

[–]Spartanwar 1 point2 points ago

Fuck-a-you Dolphin!

[–]itsmine91 0 points1 point ago

Stall! Stall! Stall!

[–]principe_di_reddit 0 points1 point ago

HORYUKEN

[–]superlokj 0 points1 point ago

Dolphin punch: falcon punches weaker friend

[–]comox 0 points1 point ago

scumbag dolphin.

[–]bbq_doritos 0 points1 point ago

[–]CavJake 0 points1 point ago

So long and thanks for all the fi... Ooooompphh

[–]Intimate_bear 0 points1 point ago

I believe the correct title is, "DOOOOOLPHIIIIIIN, PPUUUUUUUNCH!!!!"

[–]kraftymiles 0 points1 point ago

C-C-C-Combo Breaker.

[–]elainey 0 points1 point ago

Dolphins are so fucking silly.

[–]duckyonquack 0 points1 point ago

Hadouken!

[–]ProbablyHatesYou 0 points1 point ago

Here, have 130 downvotes.

[–]dasfunny 0 points1 point ago

This would have been the perfect opportunity to make a perfectly looped gif

[–]davesfakeaccount 0 points1 point ago

Better than dolphin rape

[–]Silkoon 0 points1 point ago

repost

[–]baconmeupscotty 1 point2 points ago

"OMG Gary, this is why we have practice. I am so sick of you fucking up."

[–]MrIslander 0 points1 point ago

Boop boop, mother fucker

[–]Camdor5 0 points1 point ago

Dolphin Mortal Kombat:"Finish him" BOOM! "Fatality"

[–]yirimyah 0 points1 point ago

This may not be a joke, as far as the dolphins are concerned; dolphins use a similar headbutting technique to kill porpoises. Over several blows, the impacts destroy ribs and internal organs.

http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg21028154.700-californian-dolphin-gang-caught-killing-porpoises.html

[–]bobbybuttmunch 0 points1 point ago

It seems like there is an asshole in every group.

[–]PretendsToKnowThings 1 point2 points ago

"CUT! Chad, baby, I love ya, but you've just got two left flippers. We're going to have to let you go."

[–]heehee7 0 points1 point ago

Dolphins are the only animal to have sex for pleasure ither than humans

[–]faultlessjoint 4 points5 points ago

Not so much. First off, it is impossible to really know this (given current technology and practices) as we can not determine why animals have sex, only infer what their motivations may be based on observed behaviour. There are numerous animals that behave in similar manners to dolphins that would lead us to believe that they engage in sexual activity simply for pleasure (Bonobo Chimps and Pigs, for example). However, the biggest issue with determining something like this is that it is very unlikely that any of these animals realize their sexual activity is directly connected with reproduction in the first place.

In short, a male lion has sex with a female lion because it feels compelled to and enjoys it, not because it consciously knows that it will produce offspring.

[–]Queenofbadpuns -1 points0 points ago

Go home dolphin, you are drunk.

[–]SRS_Sam 0 points1 point ago

I bet that shit hurt. Dolphins can fuck up sharks gills punching them with their noses like that.

[–]OneWhoOnlyComments -1 points0 points ago

Motherf***** John, ruining our dance routine!

[–]youregonnaloveme -2 points-1 points ago

When dolphins cheat

[–]slackertrash -1 points0 points ago

Not one Ecco the Dolphin reference?

[–]Asscough -1 points0 points ago

CONGRATULATIONS! YOU ARE THE 28th REPOSTER!

title comnts points age /r/
Dolphin punch 65coms 1217pts 8hrs funny
Here, let me help you a little. 1com 72pts 19dys gifs
What a JERK! [Animated GIF] 171coms 652pts 1yr funny
Dolphin Puuuunch!!! 1com 12pts 21dys aww
Dolphin Puuuuunch! 1com -3pts 21dys gifs
What happens every time someone tells me to "Go with the flow". 18coms 812pts 24dys funny
wombo combo!! 0coms -1pt 1mo GifSound
Dolphin Combo breaker 0coms -4pts 1mo GifSound
When I want to make a comment on a post and someone else already said it. 0coms 17pts 2mos funny
Troll Dolphin 32coms 269pts 3mos gif
Stephan Feck playing with the pro's 1com 32pts 3mos gifs
one of the top gifs of this era 1com 12pts 4mos gifs
Steve never was very graceful 3coms 31pts 4mos gifs
FUCKAH YOU DOLPHIN!! 15coms 183pts 5mos gifs
My favorite animal gif! Feel free to post yours 12coms 87pts 5mos funny
This is how I feel posting on my first reddit birthday 4coms 13pts 6mos funny
Not always graceful 52coms 421pts 7mos funny
BOOP 0coms 11pts 7mos gifs
boop 178coms 809pts 7mos funny
1 fail. They never showed up again. 24coms 268pts 8mos funny
Dolphins Crash in air 19coms 117pts 9mos funny
Fail Trick 6coms 19pts 1yr funny
C-c-c-c-ombo breaker!! 161coms 654pts 1yr funny
C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER 5coms 12pts 1yr pics
Dickhead Dolphin 82coms 508pts 1yr funny
C-C-C-Combo Breaker! [GIF] 302coms 2067pts 2yrs funny
Scumbag Whale 3coms 9pts 17dys funny
Scumbag Whale 69coms 329pts 1yr funny

[–]fawker 2 points3 points ago

we already have this repost in the thread

[–]AcuteAngleClosure 0 points1 point ago

Repost to a repost...it's a Nicky Minaj's new single