your typical delivery driver..

-RdV- · 2012-11-10T16:35:26+00:00

Where I'm from the delivery guy is paid per package he can deliver.

Problem solved.

profnutbutter · 2012-11-10T17:47:54+00:00

Our UPS guy is the opposite. He pounds on the door and gives me a heart attack while shouting "UPS" at the top of his lungs.

Ubervater · 2012-11-10T14:16:21+00:00

This being true makes me so sad.

obamaANDromneySUCKS · 2012-11-10T16:25:41+00:00

I actually took off of work two days in a row because of him! First day I waited for a knock only to see the note later on. Second day I waited outside. Damn fucker parked his car.. waited, looked at me right in the eye and then left. he never left his car.

huzzahhotel · 2012-11-10T17:03:03+00:00

The guys that deliver for UPS in my area always go above and beyond to get packages to me. I actually had them drop a package at the local post office and have the post office call me to come get it after there was an accident that shut down my road so he couldn't get to my house. Not saying there aren't some real asshats out there, just that my experience has always been positive.

skoolhouserock · 2012-11-10T16:03:59+00:00

There is also the Ace Ventura method, which usually preceeds OP's example.

totally_mokes · 2012-11-10T18:27:42+00:00

One of my friends' wives opened the door to go out as the delivery guy was leaving a "sorry we missed you" slip - he didn't even have the package with him.

Talk about awkward.

stumper93 · 2012-11-10T10:29:17-07:00

Christmas break two years ago, waiting for Fedex to deliver my new phone which I was anxiously waiting for. Waited, waited, waited. Nothing. Got to be later in the evening when we finally called the Fedex office asking where the truck was. They said the guy tried to deliver it. Bullcrap. Check the door, sure enough there's the note. Said he knocked super loud, our labrador dog was barking, and he'd come back the next day. First off, no dogs barked, we don't own a lab, and he didn't come back the next day.

TL;DR Fedex. Never again.

kiko107 · 2012-11-10T17:16:53+00:00

Royal Mail did that for me over here in the UK. was waiting for an ebay item, got the 'missed you card' and then it disappeared. the collection office couldn't find it, and the driver didn't know, a month later after a lots of phone calls i finally recieved the letter saying it was classified as lost,

2 days after the ebayer who sent it recieved it back at his, so posts it straight away, luckily my mum was at home the next time it was delivered because she spotted the postman writting something out infront of our house, it was my parcel which he didn't even bother seeing if we were in.

Jeffidiyah · 2012-11-10T16:49:27+00:00

Reminded me of this:

http://www.collegehumor.com/video/6381207/how-ups-deliveries-actually-work

Thunder_Bastard · 2012-11-10T17:03:02+00:00

I have been standing outside my house, right next to my garage, when the Fedex guy dropped off a package. He got out of the truck, walked it to the front door without ringing it, left the package and ran back to the truck and left.

He saw me standing there, and this is a rural area where the houses are far apart, it isn't like I would have been a neighbor.

That_Was_Viewtiful · 2012-11-10T17:21:20+00:00

I had a delivery man walk up to my door, watched him pretend to ring the bell (he moved his hand towards the bell and seemed to lightly caress it), then drop the package on the floor with no regard for its contents and drive off. Maybe my doorbell didn't appreciate the way he was coming on to her.

mikarm · 2012-11-10T17:33:07+00:00

Out here the delivery drivers don't even attempt to make contact with you. I think they put the package down then ring and doorbell and sprint to their truck. No matter how fast I am getting to the door they are never there and I also never see their truck.

VidenTheColdOne · 2012-11-10T17:52:35+00:00

Those bastards used to do this to me all the time. Finally I stared putting a note on my door saying "I AM home, please knock hard" Haven't missed a package since.

pcorlatan · 2012-11-10T17:49:17+00:00

At my parents' house the UPS guy is amazing and always delivers the packages no problem. At my apartment, which is in a different city, I've found two "sorry we missed you" notes while I've been inside waiting the whole time. Other times they'd leave the package without a single knock. So far one package has gone missing after being delivered but since it was a cheap bottle of shampoo I never cared to try and track it down. I have a cheap webcam I'm strongly considering mounting above my door so I can catch them doing it.

Bearnun · 2012-11-10T17:02:50+00:00

Or they leave five moving packages on your front door so someone can steal them and they do. Fuck Fedex ground.

spyhermit · 2012-11-10T10:24:02-07:00

Generally, not true. They don't have time to do this. I've witnessed a UPS driver, close to the end of his day, packages still in truck, write out 15 "we missed you" forms. I imagine he just drove to each location, ran up, stick, and run out.

NotAnotherDecoy · 2012-11-10T16:28:31+00:00

Ah yes, I too used to visit collegehumor.

Grammaton123 · 2012-11-10T17:33:22+00:00

Looks like the old UPS handbook.

kelseyjeanette · 2012-11-10T18:17:43+00:00

My UPS guy opens the front door and puts packages inside.

kawaiigardiner · 2012-11-10T09:52:47-07:00

Yeap, happened at my parents place so often. They have a chocolate Labrador that is around the back of the property which doesn't stop any one from entering the front but apparently the delivery guy is concerned about the woofy dog. Sorry the only thing to be concerned about with my parents dog is being licked to death.

klahaya · 2012-11-10T17:26:30+00:00

A dog will solve this problem. Mine loves to let me know when anybody has pulled to the front of my house.

Deluxx00 · 2012-11-10T18:14:05+00:00

Since they have my contact info, not sure why the fuck they can't call

propaganjah · 2012-11-10T15:46:39+00:00

I use to do this all the time, it's all so true...

DonkeyHeadd · 2012-11-10T18:41:03+00:00

your average reposter..

roxie1127 · 2012-11-10T15:29:59+00:00

yup pretty much sums it up

5ka5 · 2012-11-10T17:03:04+00:00

well is it better when you order a computermouse just to find it lying on the top of the mailboxes in front of the apartment building? because that's exactly what happened to my roommate some days ago. i really wonder what the delivery driver thought...

notjawn · 2012-11-10T17:21:16+00:00

They forgot: Wait till you're settled in the bathroom for a BM, then knock.

JMP1147 · 2012-11-10T17:52:37+00:00

For me they just drop the package at the door, ring the doorbell and leave before I even get to the door.

linksterNYC · 2012-11-10T17:55:12+00:00

What about the part where he fucks your wife?

DollarsThanSense · 2012-11-10T17:57:23+00:00

I can't wait for machines to take over their job.

atwoslottoaster · 2012-11-10T18:05:06+00:00

/r/shippingdrivers needs more love, come hang out or make fun, either way it needs some better content there!

Wreckcenter · 2012-11-10T18:05:41+00:00

Huh, the delivery guys in my area just leave it on the porch.

SyxxPakc · 2012-11-10T18:29:11+00:00

Is this really a huge problem with FedEx and UPS? I've personally had over a couple hundred deliveries and I have yet to run into this issue. I must be lucky.

NoDayzOff · 2012-11-10T18:32:14+00:00

I took off work one day waiting for driver. I was checking online all day. 12pm- not delivered....... 1 pm not delivered...... 2 pm not delivered...... 2:30 not delivered. I go to the mail room the check my regular mail and I have a note on my door, my actual apartment door, saying "We missed you at 2:24" I never had a knock on my door, my door bell never rang. I called UPS immediately, about 2:24, they give me this BS about how the driver called and he said he was banging on my door because he really wanted me to get my package. I was reading all day, I didn't even have the TV or music on.

I also had an incident where a driver knocked on my mother's door to deliver my step father's medicine, everyone was in the living room. I got up and looked out the peephole and saw no one. I walked outside to the delivery person speed walking down the street.

PINKMONKEY24 · 2012-11-10T18:32:56+00:00

it's bit more coordinated then that

frickendamnit · 2012-11-10T18:33:43+00:00

I was once at home and saw a delivery truck pull up to my neighbors house, the driver got out went up to the door and put a sticker on the door window, without even knocking

ThinkingJoe · 2012-11-10T18:34:23+00:00

I don't know why the video of a couple of bad delivery drivers suddenly makes everyone look at their delivery drivers as one of the bad ones. I have had a package delivered to me in pretty much an open box with loose screws and rods inside and it was delivery with everything included and no problems with the delivery. I was actually pretty amazed at the care the parcel service took to ensure the complete package's arrival despite the bad packaging.

Don't let the TV dictate what you think. Also get a wireless door bell, it will save you from missing the delivery driver.

Serial_Chiller · 2012-11-10T18:36:45+00:00

DHL does this in our neighborhood:

Fill out a "sorry we missed you" slip for every single package before you start your tour. Check the "package dropped off at your neighbor's" box, fill in the address of your little shop where you work the rest of your day.
At each of the multi-story-houses, stick all the slips that belong to this house to the wall in the hallway.
Drop off all the packages at your shop and wait for everyone to come in and pick up their packages.
Try to talk them into buying your stuff.

zeta3232 · 2012-11-10T18:42:30+00:00

I have installed a security camera on my front door, once the guy didn't show up and my amazon texted me than he tried to delivery but u wasn't home right away I call them and told them that I had a security camera they had the driver comeback and delivery the pkg.

ScienceGetsUsThere · 2012-11-10T18:49:45+00:00

My driver opens the door yells and tosses the package inside.

classicnovelty · 2012-11-10T18:55:14+00:00

Where I live, delivery companies, or at least the us postal service, just leave the package on your porch. It's a nice surprise to open up your door and find a present sent from an aunt in Texas or that new printer you ordered from Amazon.

clone56 · 2012-11-10T19:02:14+00:00

I am a delivery driver and this is really not a common practice were I live. Residential deliveres are kind of a pain in the ass cause they usually out of the way from regular business customers however the job does get done and its really frowned on not getting all pacakges delivered in a day.

Patio917 · 2012-11-10T19:02:56+00:00

Or you could just follow the directions on the note, turn it over, sign it, and it will be left during the next attempt. The shipper requires the signature (not UPS).

BatmanBabe93 · 2012-11-10T19:03:03+00:00

WRONG. The guy across from my apartment is never home and the UPS guys in fact knocks VERY loudly three or FOUR times. An says quite loudly "UPS", "DELIVERY!"

mr1337 · 2012-11-10T19:04:19+00:00

I've caught UPS in the act of just leaving the package at my door. No knock. And then running back to the truck.

oxgang · 2012-11-10T19:05:25+00:00

My DHL guy in germany used to have those notes delivered the next day by postal service. No joke.

Nipple-Copter · 2012-11-10T19:07:47+00:00

Am I the only one who finds a package at my doorstep if I wasn't home to receive it? I live in WA for reference.

leftystrat · 2012-11-10T19:08:39+00:00

UPS: America's largest, brown-suited basketball team.

solarisfowl · 2012-11-10T19:14:09+00:00

I live in an apartment high rise, top floor. One day I heard a knock on the door, and I open the door to find a delivery guy with a package for me. I was so shocked, this was the only time I've ever had something delivered directly to me instead of a slip being put in my mailbox or stuck to the door of the building. It's bullshit, its not hard to buzz and see if you're home.

The guy was from DHL if anyone is curious. I told him that I was shocked he actually came to the door and he said that he always does that, and was shocked that no one else does. It was a good day. It's annoying to have to go and pick up a package when they can bloody well at least try to deliver it.

cabooseg · 2012-11-10T19:16:39+00:00

This post is correct minus the "never to be seen again" part. if the driver has attempted a package three times then the recipient will get a call telling them to come get there box at the terminal.

RosebudTheSled · 2012-11-10T19:18:43+00:00

Or we just huck it over the fence.

godzilla_rocks · 2012-11-10T12:22:43-07:00

I Leave my lights on, curtains drawn, watching tv, 30 minutes go by. I check to see if the package has arrived. Well, the notice slip is on the buzzer. What gives?

oldguardisdead · 2012-11-10T19:23:52+00:00

I love my UPS guy. I get a knock on the door, put on pants as fast as possible, open the door but that delivery-ninja has already vanished like its some goddamn Tenchu game. I look down and there is my package. I'm getting misty just thinking about it all.

notfairever · 2012-11-10T19:28:26+00:00

Wow UPS really sucks in some places. They've never let me down like Fedex & stupid USPS. There's always at least ONE person at home yet I have always gotten a slip from USPS. Sometimes I notice quickly and drive around to find them and tell them I was home. They don't care. Last week, I didn't even get a notice! The only reason I knew to pick it up is because I had delivery confirmation and I paid attention to my tracking details.

JangSaverem · 2012-11-10T19:30:29+00:00

I am still waiting for my PS3 copy of Resident Evil 6 that UPS "lost" and just never talked about ever again....I was sent a new one from 1 day service...stupid ups

milesd37 · 2012-11-10T19:32:42+00:00

As a UPS driver... I can confirm

cycopl · 2012-11-10T19:36:07+00:00

FedEx just did this with me on Thursday. Bastards.

LavaIcicle · 2012-11-10T19:39:07+00:00

My typical delivery driver just throws the package at the door and plays heavy metal music in the truck.

nlderek · 2012-11-10T19:40:15+00:00

We order a LOT of stuff from Amazon and this was an ongoing problem for a while. After multiple complaints and signing a letter stating to leave the package no matter what (extremely safe neighborhood) the problem was essentially resolved. The one time I did have a problem was webcam that was shown delivered (while I was home). I called UPS and they called the driver who said they left it with a male neighbor. I went to the neighbor just in time to see their autistic 8 year old eating through the box. Yes - the male neighbor was the autistic (and usually clotheless) 8 year old... I think the driver was getting back at me.. No problems since (although they NEVER knock just leave the package and run).

5hr1mp · 2012-11-10T19:41:03+00:00

I though this was an analogy to the release of Half Life 3

HappyGimp · 2012-11-10T19:48:01+00:00

Where I'm at the delivery drivers knock on your door like the DEA serving a drug warrant

onikage1 · 2012-11-10T19:52:38+00:00

As someone who has delivered for FedEx, I feel obligated to give the other side of the story.

Drivers are under serious pressure to unload their packages. They have a very short window of time to make sometimes 100+ stops. Also, depending on the contract, they are sometimes paid based on how many stops they make and even fined for not attempting deliveries (bringing back too many packages). In this game, every second is important. Waiting around for people who may or may not be home costs the driver money; red lights and left turns cost money; crossing guards and closed streets cost money. It's not uncommon for the driver to become obsessive about it.

As for the slips, packages have to sit in the truck until the driver has made 3 attempts. This is a problem because they take up space and waste the driver's time. If you're not home on the first attempt, each subsequent attempt is going to be more half-assed for the purpose of saving time (until finally the driver can return the package to the terminal). FedEx Ground contractors, believe it or not, don't get paid for the stop if they have to leave a door tag. They only get paid if the package is left ("driver released") or signed for.

My advice is if you plan to have packages delivered frequently, make a copy of your house key and give it to the driver (lots of people actually do this). Or, leave a note explaining the situation (e.g. when you expect to be home and able to receive it). Delivery workers are human, and steps you take to make their lives easier are steps they'll take to make yours easier.

UZUMATI-JAMESON · 2012-11-10T19:54:09+00:00

I think I'm the only person that the UPS/FedEx guy doesn't do this to. Even if I'm not home he just leaves it on my porch or in the mailbox.

kuzndave · 2012-11-10T19:58:22+00:00

Canada post worker here. These fuckers just give me more work. A good postie will do his best at the door, then, if the particular package allows, he will find a safe place to hide it out front. Often I find myself LOUDLY going to people's back doors and leaving an electronic note that's linked to the package, saying, where I safely left it.

Binsky89 · 2012-11-10T19:58:29+00:00

Hell, our UPS guy beats on the door like he's the police.

hatedatbirth · 2012-11-10T20:01:27+00:00

I don't understand this. When I "drove" I hated "send agains". I had an apartment route and I'd knock on eight doors until I could find someone to "indirect" the package to. Every package I couldn't deliver was double the steps and more work the next day.

stabstabstabstab · 2012-11-10T20:06:24+00:00

http://xkcd.com/921/

wojokhan · 2012-11-10T20:07:53+00:00

Used to deliver for UPS. I would beat the shit out of peoples' doors before I would give up. Then I would try the place again at the end of my route if I had time. If no one was there the second time, I would deliver it the next day.

NachoCheezier · 2012-11-10T20:17:02+00:00

I work for UPS (non driver) and can confirm, although it may seem common to have packages improperly returned, it's actually a fraction of a fraction of a fraction of packages that get messed up in this way.

gearhead364 · 2012-11-10T20:19:21+00:00

Am I the only one who has heard of myUPS.com? Never picked up a package since.

PinballWizrd · 2012-11-10T20:26:55+00:00

I've never experienced this. Almost every delivery driver I've dealt with has been very friendly and made an honest effort to do their job.

tromboneboyman · 2012-11-10T20:38:56+00:00

Happened to me. Lost $140

mallerna · 2012-11-10T20:41:20+00:00

In sweden they only deliver packeges during work and school hours aswell...

Fraghax · 2012-11-10T20:53:26+00:00

Starting to think bitching about delivery drivers should have its own subreddit. Perhaps r/circlejerk would have space for these?

Rafen325 · 2012-11-10T21:00:40+00:00

As the son of a UPS delivery man, I can confirm this is what they do.

ID10T_er · 2012-11-10T21:30:38+00:00

college humor did a video like this a year ago

thunderling · 2012-11-10T21:51:18+00:00

Is this only with certain companies? Curious because I've never had this happen. No matter what company is delivering a package to my house, they just leave the package at the front door. Sometimes they knock and scamper off, so you see a package at the door with nobody around and assume it was a fairy.

But most of the time, if I'm expecting a package, I throw open the front door 20 times a day until I notice that it has magically appeared. I've never received a "Sorry we missed you" slip.

Thelellowllama · 2012-11-10T21:59:29+00:00

Am I the only person who has a large bush right in front of the house? Because I have never had this happen to me.

HHTneedstodie · 2012-11-10T22:20:59+00:00

Am I the only one who has never had this issue? They always just leave the package at the door.

GoggleHat · 2012-11-10T22:26:23+00:00

Pizza delivery is so different.

You have our money. We want it. We will stand at an obviously abandoned house for ten or twenty minutes, knocking on the door and calling the contact number on the receipt. I will not rest until you have your pizza and I get my tip. Maybe you didn't hear the first time i knocked? I'll knock again to be safe. I can hear someone in the house. Don't IGNORE ME! I HAVE CRAZY BREAD! You have my dollar! (also the twenty I need to give to my manager.)

Perhaps this would be a better model for UPS?

mrdoink20 · 2012-11-10T22:34:44+00:00

My postie is awesome. He bleeps our flat, shouts "POSTMAN" into the speaker just in case we didn't guess, jogs up to our stairs and smiles very nicely and says "See you later". I only just relised how strange it is our postman says See you later :/

ChampagneFrog · 2012-11-10T22:50:54+00:00

UPS is horrible. I was expecting a new laptop for delivery, and was home waiting for it due to working later afternoon-evening shifts that week. So I'm sitting in my living room with the curtains open, watching for the UPS truck when I see it drive straight through my complex parking lot. What? I refreshed the delivery tracker and saw that infamous delivery attempted, no one available to accept delivery notice. No slip on the door either. I called the local UPS center to complain. Since I was working evenings, it wasn't as if I could come by the center to pick up my package during their highly convenient 3-7 pm hours either. A couple of hours later, I got a call back from them saying that while the driver wouldn't come back to redeliver that day, he would meet me further along on his route. The meeting location? The main building for the regional psychiatric hospital. Perfect spot. But I got my computer.

d0k3n · 2012-11-10T22:53:15+00:00

Pretty sure op got robbed by scumbag delivery men.

irbilldozer · 2012-11-10T23:11:42+00:00

I've actually watched our UPS guy toss packages onto our porch from about halfway through our yard. I also once saw the same guy come get out of the truck and get back in then leave. I called the local delivery center and he circled back and delivered the TV that I had taken time off work for to be home to receive.

Spiritjump · 2012-11-10T23:24:33+00:00

Anyone seeking more info might also check here:

title	comnts	points	age	/r/
Aus post did this to me several times	85^coms	714^pts	12^hrs	australia
UPS training manual.	288^coms	1164^pts	7^mos	funny
UPS delivery procedure. (source?)	710^coms	1874^pts	2^yrs	funny

source: karmadecay

khalnayk · 2012-11-10T23:29:57+00:00

This happens to me with USPS all the time. Including one lost baggage being returned by the airline. Would have been a great excuse if I were a nudist or a streaker.

Police: why are u naked? Me: Waiting for my luggage delivery...

kendravixie · 2012-11-11T00:11:18+00:00

Had this problem with my local courier.

He said he delivered my very expensive package (200$) to my house, and after that it's my problem.

Only after I called the call center, got his details, and threatened to file a police report, did the courier come clean and deliver the package.

TLDR;Courier stole package, threatened police report, package found.

Appetite4destruction · 2012-11-11T00:34:36+00:00

I had this happen with UPS at the retail store where I work. It wasn't the usual driver. I was expecting a package to be delivered early that day (with our usual delivery, which take place sometime between 9 and 10 am). I tracked the package at 1:00 pm and it said the driver had made 2 attempts already. Which is weird. Because we are a retail store. We are there. All he had to do was ring the warehouse doorbell like normal.

It eventually got delivered that afternoon, but I was counting on it being delivered earlier, so my customer could pick up his order.

Fucking idiot.

Broodwitch · 2012-11-11T01:19:21+00:00

This is funny because I can relate to it.

electronicat · 2012-11-11T01:20:49+00:00

I have caught my local UPS driver doing something like this. I was home while my car was in the shop. I was sweeping the floor in the living room when I saw the truck drive up. the man gets out, with just the note in hand .. walks up and sticks it to the door. no knock nothing. .. he is about two steps away from the door when I open it and ask whats up.. he says "oh .. well let me get your package" he had to walk back to the truck to get a game I orders from amazon. it didn't even require a signature or anything .. he just didn't want to carry it to the door i guess.

NorthNJ · 2012-11-11T01:43:11+00:00

I'm a delivery driver and I do about 120 stops a day whether it's raining, snowing or sun shine. I only get paid for what I deliver so I try to make sure it gets delivered. If i have to wait 2 minutes at half of my stops then that's an extra 2 hours added to my 11-12 hour work day. When you hear my really loud truck pull in front of your house, stop what you're doing for a minute look out of your window and meet me by your door. I have waited for people who have left signs saying that they're unable to come out quickly for whatever reason. just help me help you damn it!!! Lmao

Flash604 · 2012-11-11T02:04:11+00:00

This happens all the time to me too, and of course their supervisors never believe you that the wife was home all day. But I just realized something; I'm now on the strata council, and have access to all the security cam recordings.

Try it again, Mr. Delivery Driver, try it again....

sheepman76 · 2012-11-11T02:11:57+00:00

Am i the only one around here who likes his UPS man? Never had a problem, they are always really friendly to me, and I've even had one leave the "sorry we missed you note" and then come back around a second time, later in the day, when I was actually home. They have actually done that more than once. You guys must have the angriest group of deliverymen in the world! TLDR; I love my delivery men!

Enjjoi · 2012-11-11T02:17:18+00:00

happened to me today.. now I have to wait til tuesday -_-

Krafty_Koala · 2012-11-11T04:41:45+00:00

Our driver is terrified of our dogs. They bark each time someone comes to the door. The first time with the new driver I opened the door while struggling to hold 3 dogs back behind me. Now he drops the package at the door, rings the doorbell, and runs back to the truck.

watchagonnado · 2012-11-11T04:44:13+00:00

Our delivery guy just ninja drops packages on the porch. It's secret, but fun.

Slylock · 2012-11-11T06:34:18+00:00

Fucking UPS. These bastards need to lick the smegma off an uncircumcised dick.

Random_Fandom · 2012-11-11T06:47:45+00:00

I've only had this problem with cable companies. One guy faked his 'visit' so hard, he even gave his company a detailed description of my front door as proof that he showed up, lol!

It made me furious that he had driven by, just so he could lie believably. Plus, I'd taken off work for nothing. :|

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