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top 200 commentsshow all 289

[–]playingpants 790 points791 points ago

So many clues haha

[–]Syn7axError 640 points641 points ago

...yet I still fell for it like a moron.

[–]jsake 249 points250 points ago

we all did my friend.

[–]mouseteeth 62 points63 points ago

Definitely laughed more the second time around

[–]THAT_ENT 8 points9 points ago

shit i did the same thing.....

[–]onemorebrick 8 points9 points ago

Me too. I knew it was definitely going somewhere weird, but not there. Sometimes I have trouble not glancing down at the last line when I start these.

[–]nemomnemosyne 0 points1 point ago

I got it right away. Mostly because I know Prego is a spaghetti sauce and green threads are always about spaghetti.

[–]ObscurityPrince -1 points0 points ago

I didn't even know about the Prego being a sauce thing. OP truly was not a faggot.

[–]GDmofo 0 points1 point ago

OP is always a faggot. No exceptions.

[–]fnmeng 381 points382 points ago

prego, saucy, noodle, chunks, glassy, jarred, vegetative

brilliance

[–]Cabooseman 193 points194 points ago

Fucking prego! I didn't even realize it till now

[–]AngryEnt 50 points51 points ago

Lol please keep posting this picture everywhere. I fall for that everytime.

[–]Battletooth 70 points71 points ago

When she stopped bleeding she was colorless and transparent.

[–]sram730 3 points4 points ago

... my med school brain was trying to figure out what the woman had. As soon as they said something about going pale, I thought it was an ectopic pregnancy.

Nope.

[–]oh_mos_definitely 23 points24 points ago

you forgot transparent, and spaghetti sauce... that one definitely sealed it for me.

[–]jakeyboy911 15 points16 points ago

haha.. "sealed it"

[–]fnmeng 1 point2 points ago

Yeah I did forget transparent, but I don't think spaghetti sauce should be included in a list of hints if it's the punchline :P

[–]oh_mos_definitely 13 points14 points ago

SARCASM MOTHAFUCKA, DO YOU SPEAK IT?

[–]oh_mos_definitely 2 points3 points ago

It's ok there's still hope. We can rebuild you. We have the technology.

[–]Concrow 16 points17 points ago

Faster,stronger, more of a faggot than he was before.

[–]empw/w/ 49 points50 points ago

glassy, jarred look

How did I miss this.

[–]is_naked_right_now 4 points5 points ago

I've got a raging clue right now

[–]creach66 5 points6 points ago

This is one of the greatest things I've ever read

[–]Both_Salt_AND_Pepper/fit/ 342 points343 points ago

Bra-fucking-vo

[–]anteaterpenis 94 points95 points ago

pre-fucking-go

[–]F1SH_T4C0 15 points16 points ago

ra-fucking-gu

[–]cbooth/cgl/ 0 points1 point ago

u-fucking-guuu

[–]bringerof 10 points11 points ago

[–]Sypike 6 points7 points ago

How have I never seen that before!?

[–]jxp497 1118 points1119 points ago

10/10

[–]BonerDude 474 points475 points ago

Even better read the second time through

[–]dsmarsh 166 points167 points ago

I have read it a couple times now and still can't believe I didn't see it.

Stop confusing me!

[–]MeoMix 74 points75 points ago

If ever a 10/10 was to be read, this was it.

[–]UnreachablePaul 29 points30 points ago

I would read again

[–]TheJucheisLoose 89 points90 points ago

That's what they call The Prestige.

[–]rasta_lion 97 points98 points ago

"glassy" "jarred" genius

[–]BlueThundah 55 points56 points ago

"Prego"

[–]BearBus 26 points27 points ago

"Vegetative"

[–]achshar 3 points4 points ago

"transparent" "colorless"

[–]jesusinabottle/sp/ 20 points21 points ago

"particularly saucy"

saucy

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Popsandchips 4 points5 points ago

I'm pretty sure the colorless and transparent parts are referring to the jar itself being empty.

[–]Brisco_County_III 0 points1 point ago

It seriously almost counts as punchline in the title, so good.

[–]SamZR/hm/[S] 312 points313 points ago

Holy shit. People are already copypasta-ing (heh heh) this thread. I'm both flattered and enraged.

[–]cocksickle 144 points145 points ago

Why would you be flattered? Is it your OC in the image?

[–]SamZR/hm/[S] 499 points500 points ago

WHY YES IT IS. I'M SO GLAD SOMEBODY FINALLY ASKED.

[–]PatAunces 221 points222 points ago

So you posted to 4chan, then turned around and posted it on reddit. That's like when people post their own facebook statuses.

HAY LOOK GUIZ, AM SO FUNNY

[–]SamZR/hm/[S] 356 points357 points ago

Pretty much. I just couldn't bear someone else getting precious karma from my apparently hilarious joke.

[–]mappberg 50 points51 points ago

How can proves?

[–]SamZR/hm/[S] 141 points142 points ago

[–]keagmcG 193 points194 points ago

OP you're merely confirming my suspicion that you're a faggot

[–]IronWaffled 81 points82 points ago

He's a faggot but at least he's a clever faggot

[–]SamZR/hm/[S] 54 points55 points ago

Was my flair not enough of a clue? I mean, for christ's sake, the fact that I have flair should be enough. That it says "/hm/" and you're still not sure means you're probably stupid.

[–]lidster 16 points17 points ago

He is still OP, after all.

[–]klethra 7 points8 points ago

OP is not a faggot and delivers in same thread? I must be dreaming.

[–]drunkenfaggot 0 points1 point ago

OP faggot status confirmed sir.

[–]Kronouranos 0 points1 point ago

Not very impressive. OP is still a faggot

[–]cgo435 170 points171 points ago

it was funny but you're still a big pile of queer

[–]SamZR/hm/[S] 388 points389 points ago

Oh well! ¯\(ツ)

[–]rsjac 216 points217 points ago

If you write a 10/10 you can do whatever the fuck you want with it.

[–]Brinner 26 points27 points ago

words to live by

[–]elwombat/tg/ 11 points12 points ago

Kobe wins a few championships and hes allowed to rape a few broads.

[–]AdvocateForLucifer 0 points1 point ago

Does the same apply for Laurence Taylor?

[–]iamslm22/sp/ 7 points8 points ago

I couldn't disagree more with these douches. This was one of the greatest posts on this subreddit ever. Nice job

[–]Blake83 11 points12 points ago

Opposing hockey team's captain: Dunlop, you suck cock.

Paul Newman: All I can get!

/Slap Shot

[–]soar 1 point2 points ago

Yea, fuck your OC, op.

Reddit wants more reposts.

[–]Kanye_Westicles 8 points9 points ago

dude, this was good.

[–]jsake 8 points9 points ago

but you never tell reddit that its your own status
"HAY GUISE LOK @ DIS FB GOLD IZ FOUND"

[–]PatAunces 13 points14 points ago

With "a few seconds ago" as the post time.

[–]myusernameranoutofsp 9 points10 points ago

So what you're saying is that this is being copypasta'd, and this here is the original source? What you're saying is that this is the pasta sauce?

[–]PonsAsinorumBerkeley[!] 3 points4 points ago

Deep.

[–]Derekristow 2 points3 points ago

If it's any consolation, the guy in /r/funny went to 4chan and made the screenshot himself. Probably didn't even see it here.

[–]SamZR/hm/[S] 30 points31 points ago

WHAT THE FUCK I WAS REFERRING TO POSTS ON /B/. I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW PEOPLE WERE ALREADY HARVESTING MY POST FOR KARMA ON REDDIT WTF WTF WTF

[–]onemorebrick 136 points137 points ago

I was reading this on an airplane and when I read it the second time, I started crying when I got to "particularly saucy". I couldn't finish. 10/10

[–]FaggotCaterpillar 40 points41 points ago

Neither could he.

[–]onemorebrick 10 points11 points ago

I was doing that move where you bob up and down to try and keep from laughing out loud. The old man next to me is like "what's so funny?" I was like "ehhhhhhh, nothing."

[–]walloffire 1 point2 points ago

DAYUMM!!

[–]aedgar777 13 points14 points ago

How did I not fucking know?

[–]Truck_Thunders 60 points61 points ago

God damn you op.

9/11 would read again.

[–]CorrosiveYolk 46 points47 points ago

I read the title and said to myself "prego... like the sauce?" and yet still ...

[–]kyzfrintin 3 points4 points ago

There's a sauce called prego? What a weird name for a sauce...

[–]bababooey33 5 points6 points ago

Prego (Italian for "You're welcome!") is a trade mark brand name pasta sauce of Campbell Soup Company. It was introduced internationally in 1981.

[–]mattj7 28 points29 points ago

slowclap.gif

[–]Quinnation 23 points24 points ago

Puns everywhere.

[–]Hapski 25 points26 points ago

10/10 quality meal

[–]adez23 13 points14 points ago

GOD DAMN OP YOU ARE LESS OF A FAGGOT TODAY

[–]hootenannybro 13 points14 points ago

al dente

[–]0311 14 points15 points ago

1st thought: "Oh shit, she had a miscarriage and he fucked pieces of his baby!"

2nd thought: "She put spaghetti sauce inside her pussy as a really weird and terrible prank?!?!"

3rd thought: "Fuck, I'm retarded."

[–]playingpants 0 points1 point ago

Anytime you read something that relates to spaghetti on 4chan, it's never actually referring to the food

[–]lustigjh 13 points14 points ago

I just got owned

[–]stockholm__syndrome 6 points7 points ago

Oh, god dammit.

[–]Kavilion 7 points8 points ago

Excellent

[–]SCUMDOG_MILLIONAIRE 10 points11 points ago

best green text ever. shut down everything.

[–]SBecker30/b/ 3 points4 points ago

I just keep nodding at my monitor like I'm agreeing with myself that this was a great greentext.

[–]ipster76 7 points8 points ago

Goddamnit

[–]Nascar_is_better 10 points11 points ago

punchline in title

didn't matter

OP was not a faggot

[–]azn_dude1 18 points19 points ago

That's the first line of the greentext. I don't know about you, but that's not where my punchlines go.

[–]jesusmcpenis 5 points6 points ago

I really love when /r/b/ is the top post on my frontpage.

[–]empw/w/ 22 points23 points ago

/r/b/

[–]luckyhenry -1 points0 points ago

Golf clap.

[–]yougotdied 1 point2 points ago

My noodle... Goddamnit.

[–]Abezilla116/b/ 1 point2 points ago

That and the other million fucking clues and it still flew over my head.

[–]nickyjames 3 points4 points ago

I'm glad I get to actually give a 4chan user cred for their OC. This was brilliant, funny and well written. Bravo.

[–]BrawndoTTM/b/ 3 points4 points ago

Best greentext I've read in a very long time. If this is OC well fucking done OP.

[–]Downvoted_Defender 2 points3 points ago

This is high level green text the likes of which the world has rarely seen the likes of which.

[–]CypressSC2 3 points4 points ago

http://i.imgur.com/NClEY.gif TAKE IT ALL! I just got owned

[–]Zeno84 0 points1 point ago

tfw I read the punchline first

Oh well.

[–]willgt09 4 points5 points ago

GOD DAMN IT OP! Fucking brilliant.

[–]nicearthur32 3 points4 points ago

A++ would do read again.

[–]OV5 4 points5 points ago

Fucking bravo, OP.

[–]Ampharocity 2 points3 points ago

Out-fucking-standing. standing ovation

[–]NovusHomoSapiens 2 points3 points ago

I call bullshit.

[–]wolfhelp 0 points1 point ago

I love 4chan

[–]Maester_Hodor 2 points3 points ago

[–]ClassyPotato/x/ 1 point2 points ago

Holy shit, it gets funnier the more times you read it.

[–]Luung 1 point2 points ago

Saw it coming from the first sentence.

[–]lordofthewastes -1 points0 points ago

10/10 all day

[–]A1Skeptic 0 points1 point ago

I was taken for a ride, and then dumped on the side of the road laughing.

[–]AngryEnt 2 points3 points ago

In all honesty, it's the mfw that gets me.

[–]ghall9 0 points1 point ago

My dick is off for micheal chik

[–]Hebephrene 0 points1 point ago

that was... amazing

[–]PurpleChyGuy 1 point2 points ago

Beautifully executed. Just amazing.

[–]Babkock/mu/ -1 points0 points ago

saucy

Very subtle, I like it.

[–]Zamboulie 0 points1 point ago

LMFAO! it's even funnier when you read it after and realize all the clues

[–]WhosAsking 1 point2 points ago

That..... was fantabulous.

[–]thrazefister 0 points1 point ago

Hah. Prego.

[–]JankstarrK -1 points0 points ago

4chan is more than these "deception" jokes. They're getting old.

[–]doublelen 0 points1 point ago

They were getting old, I agree. But this guy just changed the game. He put the punchline in the title. I'm fine if this is the last deception thread ever made, because it's clearly the best.

[–]majikstranger -2 points-1 points ago

[–]Soopaman 1 point2 points ago

Wow, the brilliantness of this is only apparent after you realize what it is, and go back to read it. That was well done.

[–]topher_hkr 0 points1 point ago

How the fuck did I not expect that? "Noodle"? "Jarred"?

[–]xydaine 0 points1 point ago

fuck you, you got me.

[–]DeezyCheezy 0 points1 point ago

I knew what to expect from the first line.

[–]FluorescentShadow 0 points1 point ago

-Sigh- I feel stupid for not seeing it sooner. *Facepalm

[–]Bozzer85 1 point2 points ago

god damn it. + 1 in my book I guess.

[–]hyperacti -1 points0 points ago

Saw it instantly, missing out.

[–]pillow123 0 points1 point ago

Lol!!!!

[–]invalidusermyass 0 points1 point ago

Why you nigger

[–]Wafflewarrior/w/ 0 points1 point ago

God damn! This deserves some kind of award

[–]Fiendish -1 points0 points ago

i knew as soon as he described her face as looking glassy and jarred

[–]redo8570 1 point2 points ago

This is one of those posts I wish I could give a week's worth of upvotes to.

[–]deepfunk 1 point2 points ago

i.... love it

[–]asmellybanana 1 point2 points ago

Easily the most clever green text from 4chan I've ever read.

[–]Beaver-Believer 1 point2 points ago

10/10

[–]jakemcd184 -1 points0 points ago

9/10... missing a dead baby joke

[–]ehlu15 1 point2 points ago

Good show!

[–]Supersnazz 1 point2 points ago

Nicely done.

[–]acdcfreak/b/ -1 points0 points ago

too predictable

[–]wmarnold 1 point2 points ago

Clever

[–]vhmPook 1 point2 points ago

Someone got an A in creative writing.

[–]fish4tea -1 points0 points ago

If i had a medal, i would give OP it.

[–]Grymrir/gif/ 0 points1 point ago

Wow, that's fucking brilliant. 11/10

[–]GENOCIDEGeorge/v/ 0 points1 point ago

Masterfully written. 11/10.

[–]Mechanikal 0 points1 point ago

Best one I've seen in a very long time.

[–]dronearmy 0 points1 point ago

That was fucking retarded.

[–]devanj 0 points1 point ago

damn i shoulda seen that coming...damnit op

[–]nodnodwinkwink 0 points1 point ago

Wow. This ones a keeper. Expect to see it reposted multiple times.

[–]darkesco 0 points1 point ago

That was scary then relieving and then kinda funny. Phew!

[–]Joshivity 1 point2 points ago

"Dear diary, Today, OP was not a faggot!"

[–]Gandalf_the_green/sp/ -1 points0 points ago

Am i the only one who immediately knew that it was prego sauce? because it seemed pretty obvious to me, you all must be dumb faggots. Have fun butt-sucking each other's dicks about this shit story.

[–]FischiEasd 0 points1 point ago

10/10

[–]Nexes/b/ -1 points0 points ago

2/10. Saw it coming at prego.

[–]TWALBALLIN 0 points1 point ago

10/10

[–]krylonkoopa 0 points1 point ago

I fell for it

[–]Haneesh716 0 points1 point ago

I should have seen it coming.

[–]dolomite16 0 points1 point ago

Beautiful, tears in my eyes.

[–]iambill09 0 points1 point ago

10/10

[–]Dndrhead3 0 points1 point ago

Well, OP, I was underwhelmed. I knew as soon as I only saw one "g" in "prego" that it was going to be about the spaghetti sauce.

[–]CapnClownage 0 points1 point ago

10/10 OP

[–]carlinrutf 0 points1 point ago

wow. that was one of the more clever ones i've read haha

[–]lfootr -2 points-1 points ago

Even though I'm sitting down, I'm giving you a standing ovation. Well done, OP.

[–]PariahSilver -2 points-1 points ago

This is the best thing I have ever read.

[–]xJolt -3 points-2 points ago

10/10 would read again

[–]joeessay -2 points-1 points ago

Knees weak arms spaghetti Vomit on his spaghetti moms spaghetti

[–]Acetylglucosamine 0 points1 point ago

9/10 Would put on spaghetti again.

[–]crossfitkid87 0 points1 point ago

Holy. Shit. 15/10

[–]sybban 2 points3 points ago

At first I was horrified

And then I was relieved and I farted, true story.

[–]ThatSleepyGuy 1 point2 points ago

That's the first thing I thought of when I read prego.

[–]Dr_Packenwood -3 points-2 points ago

All I have to give is the slowest fucking golf clap ever.

[–]Bucket_head 1 point2 points ago

Straight up buccacini.

[–]dcgm 0 points1 point ago

fucking brilliant. almost brought a tear to my eye.