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1586
1587

Nice funeral (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by Mufaasa

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[–]chw425 285 points286 points ago

row row row your boat, posthumously down the stream.

[–]katie224 345 points346 points ago

Merrily merrily merrily merrily, I will haunt your dreams.

[–]FeelJAkir 0 points1 point ago

i am officially scared.

[–]bloopeeriod 67 points68 points ago

He's going to decompose rapidly.

[–]herbofderpstania 24 points25 points ago

I guess the saying "up the creek without a paddle" doesn't apply here. He has a paddle.

[–]Polite_Insults 11 points12 points ago

Still up shit creek though

[–]dwheel2010 5 points6 points ago

watch out for the roaring curtains.

[–]Polite_Insults 2 points3 points ago

You've lost me....

[–]cheerleader4thedead -1 points0 points ago

Naw they plugged that up by this point.

[–]Polite_Insults 1 point2 points ago

...

[–]WhatTheFedex 0 points1 point ago

It looks like it's been broken, though...

[–]fridayjones 2 points3 points ago

I see what you did there. Nice work.

[–]sefy98 64 points65 points ago

My grandpa died 2 weeks ago, he was buried with an ice cold beer and a cigarette.

[–]HugTheRetard 25 points26 points ago

Please tell me he was also buried with a lighter

[–]Funkenwagnels 5 points6 points ago

i not someones getting haunted

[–]firefae83 0 points1 point ago

Maybe he won't need one where he's going? You know, whether it's Hell or the ground. In fact, I can't think of any reason a dead man would need a lighter unless the crematorium wasn't lighting properly. But then, I don't exactly know how those things work.

[–]sefy98 1 point2 points ago

yeah, a zippo.

[–]ReVo5000 32 points33 points ago

That's bad ass, sorry for your loss.

[–]Cephelopodia -3 points-2 points ago

Not sure if word order is intentional...

[–]revengetothetune 5 points6 points ago

wat.

[–]Cephelopodia 12 points13 points ago

I mean, you could read that as, "It's bad ass that you lost someone. I'm sorry he took your cold beer and cigarette with him."

[–]Dokbokki 2 points3 points ago

Oh.

Here's your upvote back. Sorry.

[–]Cephelopodia 2 points3 points ago

Back at ya!

[–]zero20 6 points7 points ago

I want to do something like that to. When my grandpa died, he was buried with a pack of his favorite cigarettes, a mickey of his favorite whiskey and his golf putter.

[–]fal308 10 points11 points ago

I slipped a half pint of my buddy's favorite whiskey into his jacket pocket at his funeral as well as my father-in-law's favorite lure into his pocket at his funeral. I don't believe in afterlife, but it is a good send off none the less, and the karma is always a good thing...

[–]flamingboard 8 points9 points ago

If archaeologists ever find them it will help tell their story which is what we leave behind.

[–]i_am_omega 6 points7 points ago

When I die I wanna someone to carve a bunch of random creepy shit into the inside of my casket so future scientists who discover it think I was buried alive.

[–]purposeful_lurker 1 point2 points ago

We all put dime bags in my brother's pockets at his funeral.

[–]ratajewie 4 points5 points ago

My grandfather was buried with the ashes of his cats. Not quite as bad ass. But he did fight in WW2!

[–]zero20 0 points1 point ago

Haha nice. Mine fought in WW2 as well, Canadian Navy. What was yours?

[–]ratajewie 0 points1 point ago

American Army. He was in a AAA AW battalion as well as infantry. There's actually a really badass picture of him standing on a nazi flag outside his tent, which he never told anyone the story behind.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]BCBUDDHA 5 points6 points ago

wtf are you even talking about?

[–]SuburbanScrawl 2 points3 points ago

We had a case of Busch to pass around for my Grandpas funeral services.

Also, sorry for your loss.

[–]sefy98 1 point2 points ago

At the reception we had buffalo wings, meatballs, and beer, and thanks for the condolences.

[–]Bro_Hawkins 45 points46 points ago

Scruffy's gonna die the way he lived.

[–]pizzatime 0 points1 point ago

Scruffy is a zombie.

[–]hpuk 69 points70 points ago

Putting the fun back into funeral.

[–]DrunkleAl 15 points16 points ago

He puts the rig in rigor mortis'

[–]jeaton 16 points17 points ago

He puts the rave back into the grave.

[–]Packers91 1 point2 points ago

There's a funeral home in my area that actually sets people up like this, maybe not as goofy with the kayak but there was one funeral where the guy was laying back in his recliner with a blanket on him watching Steelers highlights on tv. Was pretty cool.

[–]Emily_MI 47 points48 points ago

That just looks so wrong to me.

[–]brussels4breakfast 4 points5 points ago

It does.

[–]bernando2 24 points25 points ago

reminds me of strangers with candy

[–]mwlgo6 82 points83 points ago

Not sure if cool oar macabre.

[–]midgetlotterywinner 37 points38 points ago

Up boat for you. Hull of a good pun.

[–]mcbobgorge 23 points24 points ago

Are we going turn this into a paddle royale?

[–]bloopeeriod 17 points18 points ago

Water you gonna do about it?

[–]SirRosie 22 points23 points ago

I must bow to your stern comment.

[–]Thydamine 20 points21 points ago

I hope knot.

load more comments (2 replies)

    [–]yea_i_nutted 14 points15 points ago

    Funny?

    :|

    [–]mcstafford -1 points0 points ago

    Only if you have a sense of humor.

    I suppose if it wasn't the dead guy's idea then maybe not.

    [–]Trying2MakeYouLOL 71 points72 points ago

    Canoe even do that legally?

    [–]Aj45 39 points40 points ago

    That is a kayak.

    [–]Chaoticleaf 66 points67 points ago

    Canoe just accept the funniness

    [–]lisabadcat 49 points50 points ago

    I'm o-kay ack-nowledging that. Wow that was a stretch.

    [–]chesh420 18 points19 points ago

    Sure he just wasn't caught in the wake?

    [–]mamamaMONSTERJAMMM 16 points17 points ago

    I sea this hull thread is a boat nothing

    [–]ReVo5000 9 points10 points ago

    I didn't sea that! :O

    [–]J-Holm 5 points6 points ago

    These puns have me eskimo-rolling with laughter.

    [–]DrunkleAl 1 point2 points ago

    He's quite be-raft of life.

    [–]pickoneforme 6 points7 points ago

    oar is it? yes? no...?

    [–]FatDIck9 -2 points-1 points ago

    Oh no, he is decomposing quite Rapid-ly.

    [–]Bitter_Idealist 2 points3 points ago

    Not to Rick's roommates, it isn't.

    [–]rhythmandshoes 0 points1 point ago

    Thank god someone said it. I was worried everyone had forgotten... just like Rick forgot his canoe kayak!

    [–]Trying2MakeYouLOL 0 points1 point ago

    I canoe that.

    [–]cheerleader4thedead 0 points1 point ago

    kayak you a question? Why must you hate puns?

    [–]SmartAssUsername 22 points23 points ago

    Whatever floats his boat I guess.

    [–]FloggingHank 8 points9 points ago

    Now there's a guy who's ready for the River Styx! (badum tss)

    [–]poo706 4 points5 points ago

    Looks like when John Waters guested on My Name is Earl as an unconventional funeral director: www.tvguide.com/celebrities/john-waters/photos/279296/80021

    [–]AyeAyeLtd 0 points1 point ago

    Exactly what I was thinking. Luckily, I searched the page for this first. Good for you for getting here first.

    [–]imlostinthishouse 0 points1 point ago

    john waters is just so great.

    [–]poo706 0 points1 point ago

    Agreed! I love Pecker, but it never seems to get as much recognition as his other flicks.

    [–]imlostinthishouse 0 points1 point ago

    A lot of his films seem to not get enough recognition! I'm really into Cecil b demented right now

    [–]Masshole3000 6 points7 points ago

    RELEVANT

    [–]kleptobismol 4 points5 points ago

    seriously.. someone should have put a life vest on him just for the lolz

    [–]IamFullofStars -2 points-1 points ago

    I don't think there is any risk of drowning.

    And even if there was, you wouldn't be risking much.

    [–]kleptobismol 7 points8 points ago

    so..... you got the joke.....

    [–]woody1594 13 points14 points ago

    Wow, I give major props to who ever embalmed him, cause they had to embalm him in that pose, cause once embalmed you cant move them they are fixed in that spot. and getting drainage and proper injection while in that pose would be incredibly hard. Source. Funeral Science student, that works in a funeral home.

    [–]mbray 16 points17 points ago

    False!

    Source -3rd generation funeral director

    [–]woody1594 2 points3 points ago

    really then how would you make a person in the pose after they are already embalmed,

    [–]mbray 6 points7 points ago

    http://i.imgur.com/Mk76H.gif

    [–]woody1594 0 points1 point ago

    hahaha that is pretty funny, well even if you could be done, I think it would be extremely hard to do.

    [–]JellyBeanKruger 0 points1 point ago

    So, who's right here? O.o

    Also, I live in Texas and want to become a funeral director, but when I toured the only school near me I was told that the school was expensive and embalmers make very little money. Got any input?

    [–]informaldehyde 2 points3 points ago

    It's very hard to pose someone after embalming...they firm up and tissues just won't bend and flex the way they used to. But I suppose if you're determined enough you could do it.

    First off all, do you want to be a funeral director or an embalmer? They're quite different. You can be both, of course. I believe there are 4 mortuary schools in Texas, but honestly I'm not familiar with any of them - I can't really form an opinion as far as how expensive they are. Pay can be based on experience, so you won't make as much when you first start out. Plus, the more titles you have (funeral director, embalmer, crematory manager, etc) the more earning potential you have.

    Disclaimer: Results may vary greatly by state; I'm not familiar with the licensing requirements of all states. I'm licensed in California. Just my informed input :)

    [–]JellyBeanKruger 0 points1 point ago

    Oh, sweet, I really appreciate it! Honestly, I'm more interested in the behind-the-scenes stuff. I have also been very interested in the crematory business. Do you know much about it, being in that loop? Thanks! :D

    [–]informaldehyde 0 points1 point ago

    I'm like you, I love the behind-the-scenes stuff. Cremation rates are rising across the country, so it would definitely be a good idea to get yourself into that. I do prefer embalming to funeral directing and arranging. Be aware that you may not be able to just embalm, you'll probably have to meet with families, direct services, do removals, etc, especially when you're just starting out. It really depends on where you end up working. I would suggest looking into some of the other schools if you one you visited wasn't to your liking. Learn about the licensing requirements too. Here in CA, we have to do a 2-year embalming apprenticeship (and graduate mortuary school) before getting your embalmer license. See if there's a similar path in your state. Visit local funeral homes and tell them you're interested in the industry. You never know, you could end up with a job, or at least with your foot in the door. It never hurts to network. Anything else you'd like to know? I might be able to help :)

    [–]EclecticEelVoltage 7 points8 points ago

    Survives sinking of Titanic. Gets buried in Kayak.

    [–]tellmetheworld 2 points3 points ago

    You know what? This is a NICE FUNERAL. Why would it be better if he were crammed in a little box that has ZERO reference to life? This is how this man lived. This symbolizes his passions. I'm 100% on board with this way of celebrating life. As opposed to playing into death. Good for his family.

    [–]koolkid005 0 points1 point ago

    Yeah its honestly not any stupider than putting them in a coffin. Which is basically just a box to stop you from returning your nutrients to the earth.

    [–]Antbutter 1 point2 points ago

    This shit belongs in /r/WTF

    [–]Stevie_Rave_On 4 points5 points ago

    Reminds me of Willie the Wimp who was buried in a Cadillac coffin. http://i.imgur.com/osxJb.jpg

    Stevie Ray Vaughan covered the song "Willie the Wimp"...it was on the From Dusk Till Dawn soundtrack. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dkQDku5a4ks

    [–]auricfinger 0 points1 point ago

    Came here for this. Impressed that it came from someone with your username.

    [–]smell_e 4 points5 points ago

    Would make rolling over in your grave a whole lot easier!

    [–]Blenor 4 points5 points ago

    That's /r/WTF worthy..

    [–]mackinoncougars 4 points5 points ago

    Have you ever read the comments on that place? nothing is ever good enough for them.

    [–]Blenor 0 points1 point ago

    "Slightly out from ordinary" seems to be the case.

    [–]AbaloneNacre 2 points3 points ago

    I guess he bought that boat.

    [–]schnooglybear 0 points1 point ago

    seems weird but ok, whatever floats your boat, man

    HAAAAAAAHHH

    [–]koolkid005 0 points1 point ago

    How is this any stupider than a coffin? Coffins just seem normal cause you're used to them, they're actually really stupid.

    [–]schnooglybear -1 points0 points ago

    i don't think it's stupid. i just set it up that way so i could make a side splittingly hilarious joke to leave you all in stitches

    [–]koolkid005 0 points1 point ago

    Yup, man that was top notch humor I have never seen anything like it.

    [–]Reackless 0 points1 point ago

    repost this to r/wtf

    [–]Joliet_Jake_Blues 2 points3 points ago

    Ironically, he never kayaked, or expressed interest in it.

    [–]LittleRadcock 2 points3 points ago

    What.

    [–]Santaissick 3 points4 points ago

    That's strange... He's in kayak but he has a canoe paddle. I have tried it that way, the kayak went upside down.

    [–]Gpr1me 8 points9 points ago

    How do you think he died?

    [–]Cheese_Bits 2 points3 points ago

    He's not embalmed, just frozen!

    [–]pizzatime 1 point2 points ago

    There are a lot of boaters who paddle a single blade in kayak shaped boats in a kneeling position. It's called a C1.

    [–]brussels4breakfast 3 points4 points ago

    I would like to know if this man actually wanted this done.

    [–]Tejnin 2 points3 points ago

    Probably. I'm a funeral director & we deal with a lot of crazy requests

    [–]brussels4breakfast 0 points1 point ago

    That's so bizarre and creepy. Actually, it makes the man look kind of ridiculous. Guess he doesn't care.

    [–]dossier 1 point2 points ago

    http://i.imgur.com/SWksB.jpg

    [–]ImSortofANerd 1 point2 points ago

    I know I've seen this... what's this from?

    [–]xwexcollidex 2 points3 points ago

    MR DEEDS GOT IT took me a minute

    [–]ImSortofANerd 1 point2 points ago

    YES. Thank you.

    [–]xwexcollidex 0 points1 point ago

    I have too but I can't place it right now... Dang

    [–]xwexcollidex 0 points1 point ago

    Is it from that Adam Sandler Movie?

    [–]crash_over-ride 2 points3 points ago

    They forgot the googly-eyes glasses

    [–]potatobacondude 3 points4 points ago

    Looks like that dog got that roommate's canoe back to him...

    [–]sarcasmismywayoflife 1 point2 points ago

    I can't reconcile feeling horrified for those that came to the funeral with wanting to give the guy props for creativity

    [–]koolkid005 0 points1 point ago

    How is this any less disturbing than a coffin?

    [–]Bikenutt 0 points1 point ago

    Its always nice to go out while making most others scratch their heads. Nice one gramps.

    [–]Drawtaru 1 point2 points ago

    OP died of old age waiting for Rick to come get his damn canoe.

    [–]ButtFuckSlutsGoNuts -1 points0 points ago

    Who paddles a kayak with a giant drill bit?

    [–]arehini -1 points0 points ago

    You got your upboat before I even saw the pic, Mufaasa.

    [–]Tejnin 1 point2 points ago

    My embalming teacher told us how she had to prop a gentleman to be standing up in the corner of the visitation room with a beer in his hand. It was crazy-difficult to do but its possible

    [–]jagenigma 1 point2 points ago

    Oh god why....?

    [–]RhettWilliam 0 points1 point ago

    Better than a dog selling a "canoe"

    [–]Sk8rkid5200 0 points1 point ago

    What if this was actually an ad for Kaotic.com and they are saying that you'll row with them till death.

    [–]h8bit 0 points1 point ago

    One can only imagine that the guy stipulated the particulars of his funeral in his will as a sort of final "fuck you" to his family.

    [–]chaffednipple 0 points1 point ago

    You're my boy, Blue!

    [–]slowdowniamdumb 0 points1 point ago

    i will sell that kayak and buy a damn boat

    [–]meesterseth 0 points1 point ago

    fish out of water.

    [–]mbray 0 points1 point ago

    As a funeral director myself, ..I'll be more amazed at how you plan to get him in the hearse.

    [–]minnick27 0 points1 point ago

    Kayak rack on top of the hearse?

    [–]Y_I_Tittle 0 points1 point ago

    Well, he went to Casablanca for the waters, but was misinformed.

    [–]wandahickey 1 point2 points ago

    Is he...smiling?

    [–]Jabbawookiee 0 points1 point ago

    I guess you can have your kayak and eat it, too.

    [–]MajorLazy 1 point2 points ago

    Thank god he wasn't a porn star.

    [–]raresunshine -1 points0 points ago

    shut up!

    [–]lordeddardstark -1 points0 points ago

    He looks like he's getting his dick sucked

    [–]theloz 0 points1 point ago

    I'd totally like something classy like this at my funeral.

    [–]EuropeanLady 0 points1 point ago

    A good way to honor this person's favorite pastime.

    [–]iheartdrums86 1 point2 points ago

    This is actually a wake.... no pun intended....

    [–]Zhugebob 1 point2 points ago

    Alright. Now we just need to put his worldly treasures in the boat with him, send him towards a waterfall and light him up.

    Then he can paddle in Valhalla for all eternity!

    [–]wonderboy2402 0 points1 point ago

    Yea, but was he buried in it or sent down the river?

    [–]tmotytmoty 0 points1 point ago

    doing it right.

    [–]anthrocide 0 points1 point ago

    Let's all thank the guy at the funeral with a camera phone that thought this was weird enough to post on the internet.

    [–]fman5k 0 points1 point ago

    No, he just got stuck and they couldn't get the body out

    [–]berniss 0 points1 point ago

    Cheaper than a coffin... It was probably just takin up room in the garage

    [–]BLVD 0 points1 point ago

    Beats the burial fee. Just put him in the water and let him float to the next county. I would have used a rental kayak.

    [–]shamrockkid29 0 points1 point ago

    Looks like he's ready for the rivers Styx.

    [–]no_artificial_colour 0 points1 point ago

    For sale:
    1 Kayak, good condition.
    Price negotiable.
    See attached photo.
    CALL 555-DEAD-DUDE

    [–]ELEMENTALITYNES -1 points0 points ago

    i don't think i'd ever be saying this, ever, but I think that this may belong in /r/wtf

    [–]BitchGoddess 0 points1 point ago

    At first I thought, wrong, then I thought fuck it, all funerals should be like this! Celebrate the person's life, instead of the usual corpse-n-the-box thing. For my dad's, my sister, ex bro-in-law and I did shots from his favorite, Chivas Regal, then left him the rest of the bottle for "the road!"

    [–]koolkid005 1 point2 points ago

    Yeah I mean, a coffin is actually REALLY stupid, all you're doing is stopping the cycle of life. When you die you're supposed.to return your nutrients to the earth.

    [–]DamianTD 0 points1 point ago

    This is why I want to be cremated. So one of my dumb relatives doesn't fuck it up. They always said I look like Pee-Wee Herman so it could end badly for me.

    [–]BlazefireSaber 0 points1 point ago

    All he needs is a beer and a cigar.

    [–]unixpro -1 points0 points ago

    this is fucking sick, why do ppl feel the need to look at corpses?/ wtf once your dead thats is, you belong buried or incinerated. If i were president, close casket mandatory!!

    [–]koolkid005 0 points1 point ago

    Burial is stupid. "Hey lets spend shit tons of money on a dead guy to make sure he doesn't return his nutrients to the eearth. I mean, who gives a shit about the circle of life?

    [–]unixpro 0 points1 point ago

    my issue is not su much burials, but the whole, lets spend 12 hrs mourning someone whos dead, lets stared at their corpse whos been embalmed and mummified.

    eww.

    [–]koolkid005 0 points1 point ago

    I've never seen a 12 hour funeral. I don't 100% agree with you but I see where you're going. I definitely think that some sort of event should happen but it should be more to celebrate the persons life rather than mourn their death. In fact, we shoudl celebrate their death too, it's the continuation of the beautiful cycle of life that brought us about and will bring about our ancestors.

    [–]unixpro 0 points1 point ago

    Yep.

    [–]rustyanalhook 0 points1 point ago

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4TfwFN2rOlo

    [–]bringingthehate -1 points0 points ago

    i hope you meant that in an exaggeratedly sarcastic way

    [–]koolkid005 0 points1 point ago

    What? This is way better than a normal funeral. First of all modern burial is idiotic, all you're doing is robbing the earth of nutrients it gladly gave to you. And second of all, this actually celebrates the guys life.instead of being all about the living people.

    [–]bringingthehate 0 points1 point ago

    wow, some one took their preacher pills this morning.

    [–]koolkid005 0 points1 point ago

    I mean, do you disagree? What is the point of burying someone in a coffin except to give the living a false sense that their lost loved one is still somehow here because their body is?

    [–]bringingthehate 0 points1 point ago

    im more of a buried at sea type of guy

    [–]koolkid005 0 points1 point ago

    I want to have a tree planted on top of me and use my body as fertilizer. Circle of life and all that.

    [–]EpicNoob991 0 points1 point ago

    Is anyone else not to sure if you should leave an upvotes or not...?

    [–]al3x_b 0 points1 point ago

    He puts the FUN in FUNeral

    [–]brainfoam 0 points1 point ago

    I never laugh at dead people, but i just fucking laughed pretty hard at this

    [–]F5_supermonkey 0 points1 point ago

    that guy in the kayak - he doesn't look so good.

    [–]Ginodon 0 points1 point ago

    this reminds me of a story where this lady got rigor mortis after dying while sitting up and during her funeral she just decided to sit up and say hi. (by the way she was dead and didn't actually speak she just sat up)

    [–]minnick27 0 points1 point ago

    They used to chain bodies down because of this.

    [–]BaconBundle 0 points1 point ago

    The funeral would've been much more eventful if it was held at some white water rapids

    [–]MileHighBarfly -1 points0 points ago

    If ever there was a post for /r/Wtf

    [–]ElBurroBorracho -1 points0 points ago

    I think this belongs on r/WTF.

    [–]didileavethegason 0 points1 point ago

    canoe's that?

    [–]blablabla222 0 points1 point ago

    This should be in /r/WTF

    [–]LindbergBaby -1 points0 points ago

    Grandpa put the fun in funeral

    [–]8_4_Schu 0 points1 point ago

    When I die, I want to be thrown out of an airplane from altitude in a superman costume.

    [–]zidanetribal -1 points0 points ago

    TIL that if Tom Cruise was a kayak, he'd be Tom Cruiser.

    [–]betafish37 4 points5 points ago

    TIL you can make terrible puns from anything

    [–]Verus_Amicus 1 point2 points ago

    You learned that just today?

    Welcome to the internet. Tis a silly place.

    [–]gus2144 1 point2 points ago

    Are they gonna bury him like that?

    [–]cycopl -1 points0 points ago

    Uh, no. This funeral is a disaster. Someone crashed a fucking canoe into it and fell asleep.

    [–]betafish37 -2 points-1 points ago

    Look at him, he's on a boat.

    [–]PopeAlexander 2 points3 points ago

    He's on a motherfucking boat.

    [–]NewWhirledOrder -2 points-1 points ago

    Why am I seeing a dead body in r/funny? How is that funny? Has the humour in /r/funny really degraded (and it has been degrading A LOT over the past few months) to the point where we have to post pictures of dead bodies from people's funerals for a laugh?

    [–]jonesr1045 -2 points-1 points ago

    I sink that this is something to boats about.

    [–]BigMcLargeHuge -2 points-1 points ago

    I'll see your kayak-guy and raise you obsessive-Steelers-guy.

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