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top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]IanFin 861 points862 points ago

They do that so they don't show barf.

[–]Zeorg 550 points551 points ago

And it also makes graffiti invisible.

[–]this_sort_of_thing 403 points404 points ago

Just in general it does a better job at hiding dirt and other such.

[–]Crim91 235 points236 points ago

I AM A FAN OF OTHER SUCH.

[–]LexSenthur 46 points47 points ago

THINGS.

[–]Crim91 34 points35 points ago

STUFF.

[–]brigodon 46 points47 points ago

NOUNS.

[–]Greasy_Animal 90 points91 points ago

I don't know how many times I've gotten on a bus and the fabric on the seats was just covered in graffiti

[–]CV13 87 points88 points ago

You actually don't know, because the pattern hid the graffiti perfectly.

[–]ctaps148 63 points64 points ago

I tried spray painting a bus seat once and it was like the paint just disappeared

[–]Kiaal 3 points4 points ago

It will work if you just spray paint it all one solid block color. Where's their fancy designs now?

[–]BringingTelos 74 points75 points ago

Also confetti.

[–]jesussmoke 27 points28 points ago

And barf

[–]ydnari 101 points102 points ago

barfetti

[–]Level_75_Zapdos 34 points35 points ago

[–]PaintEater 4 points5 points ago

Thank you

[–]CatAstrophy11 0 points1 point ago

[–]Indieindie85 50 points51 points ago

We'll make the graffiti invisible by making it look like there is graffiti on it - genius.

[–]austin1414 20 points21 points ago

Let's avoid getting robbed by not having any money! Genius!

[–]d_ja 17 points18 points ago

No one will be able to set my car on fire if I make sure my car is always on fire.

[–]WIDE_OPEN_BEAVERS 13 points14 points ago

NOW EXPLAIN CASINO CARPETING.

[–]Jay7779 20 points21 points ago

They do it so that it hurts your eyes/upsets the stomach when you look down while walking. That way you're always looking at the slots and tables and are more enticed to play.

[–]cjmook21 80 points81 points ago

The carpets in Vegas casinos are really busy so people don't notice dropped chips and pick them up.

[–]Arktri 71 points72 points ago

You know, I would actually be interested in how much money in chips the casino picks up off the floor each day. I feel like the worlds most boring man right now.

[–]richandwhite 59 points60 points ago

Boring? No, questions like that are the reason Wikipedia is so wildly popular. Learning is fun.

[–]Napoleon_Borntoparty 5 points6 points ago

At university I made a habit of always looking at the patch of floor around me when I was waiting for service at one of the campus bars. So many people would pull their phones/wallets out and send change across the floor and not think to pick it up because they just got their student loans in, and because they were absolutely bladdered.

I often drank for free, and sometimes even made a profit. And this is back in the days when 8 pints of lager was my average Tuesday night.

[–]matty323 12 points13 points ago

Its actually deeper than that. Look at the roof.. boring.. look at the floor .. too busy.. look straight ahead.. ding ding ding ding ahooogah . They also add o2 to the air to prevent sleepyness

[–]CarldeGrasseHawking 23 points24 points ago

Speak for yourself. I'm completely addicted. I'm pretty sure a withdrawal would be the end of me.

[–]rustyshaklefurrd 13 points14 points ago

The Oxygen thing isnt true.

http://www.snopes.com/luck/casino.asp

[–]Cptpshark 29 points30 points ago

They do that so it hides the Gummi Worms

[–]wasting_internet 52 points53 points ago

Or piss. Boston's trains have this casino carpeting pattern on the seats for that exact reason.

edit: added photo

[–]wetsandwiches 6 points7 points ago

Why make the effort? Barf looks great on everything.

[–]Says_Colors 3 points4 points ago

I always assumed bus upholstery companies also create casino carpets

[–]mrcn 9 points10 points ago

Sort of a captcha-pattern!

[–]toodrunktofuck 6 points7 points ago

Click into the open circle.

[–]PikachuSnowman 371 points372 points ago

This is how dirty bus seats can get...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3wUJ0VwYnCU&feature=plcp

[–]TheActualAWdeV 230 points231 points ago

I like to think that that hammer is actually just a pepper shaker and that all the dust comes from that instead of the seat.

[–]verisimilarity 66 points67 points ago

Oh shit. That's what I thought was happening

[–]youcanthandlethetruf 30 points31 points ago

Fuck, me too. for the first minute. well not a pepper shaker, but a dust shaker. I thought it was some sort of prank where they show how dirty you can make a seat with that weird dust/sand producing hammer.

[–]blakefoster 170 points171 points ago

It's like decades of bus farts were just excavated.

[–]SQUID_FUCKER 36 points37 points ago

I can smell them.

[–]CatAstrophy11 31 points32 points ago

He who smelt it....

[–]znat 88 points89 points ago

... Increases his blacksmithing skill?

[–]gloomypancake 62 points63 points ago

It would be really satisfying to hoover that...

[–]CatAstrophy11 23 points24 points ago

You mean Dyson.

[–]ctaps148 18 points19 points ago

You mean Shop-Vac.

[–]dkey1983 9 points10 points ago

Oh wow...

[–]DujekR 13 points14 points ago

I remember several years ago on my school bus some of the guys at the back figured out that if they smacked the seats hard enough the dust would go everywhere. It was awful.

[–]Name0fTheUser 3 points4 points ago

I had the same thing happen, only I had athsma.

[–]Impu12 40 points41 points ago

Who owns such a dorky hammer...

[–]MythOfLight 52 points53 points ago

you're a dorky hammer

[–]emkoirl 3 points4 points ago

That's an outrageous accusation.

[–]yokiedinosaur 19 points20 points ago

It's not just any hammer; it's a specially crafted fart dust gavel.

[–]sephsta 8 points9 points ago

Urgh, Arriva busses always were dirty.

[–]wetsandwiches 8 points9 points ago

I had no idea my ass was so dusty...

[–]SweetGehenna 19 points20 points ago

Never seen a dildo put to another good use.

[–]dunchen22 26 points27 points ago

[–]Mulligank 3 points4 points ago

Is this standard?

[–]MonkeyWorldUK 6 points7 points ago

On any bus that's been running for a little while yes. You can just slap the seats with your hand and it'll do this.

[–]itsBENTASTIC 12 points13 points ago

...I'm tempted to try this on my train ride through San Jose on Monday. Yet after sitting next to a Charles Manson doppelgänger who smelled of rancid Cheetos, I feel preemptively disturbed for how much shit and dried up semen will come out of that seat.

[–]rottenseed 125 points126 points ago

"We don't want something that's trendy, but will one day become dated. We want something that has a timeless kind of ugliness to it"

[–]sackboy_666 1261 points1262 points ago

i was on a bus and it had pictures of boats on the seat

[–]Sinnic 1426 points1427 points ago

Cool, man

[–]Zym 872 points873 points ago

Another fantastic interaction.

Thanks everybody.

[–]Accidentus 274 points275 points ago

Cool. Cool cool cool.

[–]denemigen 88 points89 points ago

Hot, hot hot hot.

[–]dlanmaar 157 points158 points ago

TIGHT TIGHT TIGHT TIGHT

[–]jesusinabottle 55 points56 points ago

yo, chill, chill chill chill, mega, chill

[–]SQUID_FUCKER 61 points62 points ago

Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.

[–]MythOfLight 30 points31 points ago

James, while John had had "had," had had "had had;" "had had" had had a better effect on the teacher.

[–]Jpot 23 points24 points ago

beats nearest person to death

[–]hot_skillet 10 points11 points ago

[–]tpenate 13 points14 points ago

Me mind on fire, me soul on fire feelin' HOT, HOT, HOT

[–]asdfcasdf 2 points3 points ago

Cruel. Cruel, cruel, cruel.

[–]DMagnific 8 points9 points ago

I fear your reference may have been lost.

[–]cyclicamp 5 points6 points ago

It's easily the most civil interaction I've seen around here in a while.

[–]bobsmith93 160 points161 points ago

[–]imacatmeowmeow 53 points54 points ago

I was on the bus and I can confirm on random squiggly lines. Also when I read this and looked at the seat I almost died laughing.

[–]fm87 21 points22 points ago

Nice boat.

[–]gettempapa 8 points9 points ago

I don't know what this is, but I like it.

[–]cthulhubert 2 points3 points ago

This is what it is. (WARNING! TV TROPES LINK!)

[–]CarlosWeiner 276 points277 points ago

little known fact: those shitty bus seat covers are scientifically designed to hide all the disgusting shit that gets on them.

[–]JohnAbruzzi 50 points51 points ago

Well when you include the word science, then it must be true.

[–]BrotherSeamus 59 points60 points ago

LITERALLY

[–]rhayward 35 points36 points ago

mom's spaghetti, there's sweater on his sweater already.

[–]IThinkAbout17 11 points12 points ago

Sweater on his sweater? Thats new..

[–]che_singh 20 points21 points ago

He's nervous, but on the nervous he looks spaghetti

[–]shutupjoey 10 points11 points ago

To drop balls, but his meats all spaghetti.

[–]belgianwafflestomp 15 points16 points ago

His palms are penne, knees meat, arms spaghetti

Add meatballs to the spaghetti, mom's secret recipe

He's nervous, but on the surface mom's spaghetti looks ready for meatballs

but he eats all the spaghetti, he can choke down,

the whole crowd goes spaghetti

He opens his mouth, but spaghetti won't come out

He's cooking now, everybody's cooking now

The clock's run out, dinner is over, bloah!

Snap back to spaghetti, spaghetti is gravity

OP goes Rabbity, he choked

He's so mad, but he won't give up that

Spaghetti, no

He won't have it , he knows spaghetti looks like little ropes

It don't matter, it's dope

He knows that, but he's broke

He loves spaghetti he knows

When he goes back to his mobile kitchen, that's when it's

Back to spaghetti again, yo

This whole rap's spaghetti

He better grab spaghetti fast and hope he don't spill it

You better lose yourself in the pasta, lasagna

Spaghetti, you better never let it go

You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to eat

This spaghetti only comes once in a lifetime yo

[–]rene_gokarts 9 points10 points ago

no those were trains

[–]brother-seamus 2 points3 points ago

Hot damn! I saw your post and thought: did I write this earlier and don't remember?

[–]SQUID_FUCKER 6 points7 points ago

That pattern always makes me feel nauseous.

[–]Spectrum_Yellow 135 points136 points ago

this is what the bus seats look like where I live. They've already put graffiti on them so when people actually graffiti it doesn't stand out

[–]nebos11 77 points78 points ago

Is your city stuck in 1988?

[–]herrmister 21 points22 points ago

You put your finger on it. I feel like that about all of Australia, actually.

[–]ukiyoe 75 points76 points ago

I'm so sorry for your city.

[–]yandere_for_you 14 points15 points ago

Where do you live? That's amazing.

[–]Spectrum_Yellow 19 points20 points ago

I live in Sydney, Australia. It just feels normal to me I guess

[–]Horse3 13 points14 points ago

Now all you need is a matching suit! http://imgur.com/i09Zo

[–]serious_mullet 9 points10 points ago

Hello there fellow Sydney resident!

[–]stentonsarecool 24 points25 points ago

What a great idea! Following that logic lets make the toilets brown so the shit doesn't stand out or better let's paint shit on them so the shit doesn't stand out or even better let's remove the toilets out of e equation and shit in a pile of crap so the shit you just shat is just part of the giant shitty mountain on your bathroom floor.

[–]Ragey_McRagerton 4 points5 points ago

All the happier to find out this was Sydney. I'm now going to go down south and graffiti by painting neat blue material.

[–]sgtpppr 28 points29 points ago

They only use random shapes to hide the feces and semen stains.

[–]SwimmingNaked 6 points7 points ago

Just means I need to create bigger stains.

Oh...wait...

[–]Doza1 33 points34 points ago

YES! Squiggly lines of different colors, how did we not see this before!?

[–]wetsandwiches 19 points20 points ago

Billions wasted on research and development into squiggly lines of identical colour..

[–]Patbach 31 points32 points ago

Part of my job is to clean busses. And I'd like to add that even worse design flaw is that since it's made from tissue, we can't clean them because they take to long to dry.

So busses go their entire life (~15years) without ever having their seat cleaned (exept when someone vomits on it).

The reason for tissue is because on plain plastic surfaces people were slipping off their seat. Good reason but personally I can't help to wonder how hard it is to find an anti-slip surface that is washable.. can't be that hard?

[–]hpfanficluvr 9 points10 points ago

oh god...Now I cant even reassure myself that the seats must occasionally get cleaned. Damn. I think I'll take to standing now

[–]Dubio 3 points4 points ago

The Helsinki subway has plastic seats. The trick is to have grooves on the surface.

[–]KiXpiX 42 points43 points ago

Stockholm subway train seats

Reminded me a lot of the picture somehow, even if there is motives.

[–]xmsxms 24 points25 points ago

What kind of motive could a bus seat have?

[–]Benders_brick 22 points23 points ago

I see they came close to having their own similar incident to the great lighthouse candy incident of 2007

[–]arte444 13 points14 points ago

I should sell t-shirts with bus seat designs

[–]rhayward 105 points106 points ago

"Guys, we need new seats"

"Let me see that... ATCHOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

"Wow, that is perfect, thank you Johnson. It's a wrap boys!"

[–]ShinichiKudo 10 points11 points ago

This is how some of our buses look like in Germany. http://imgur.com/AD3C9 Note: All seats are on a different height. I still couldn't figure out why.

[–]redditicon92 69 points70 points ago

all canadian buses..

[–]Ree81 44 points45 points ago

I'm Swedish and I associate...

[–]BurningChildren 32 points33 points ago

[X] Netherlands

[–]Yeffers 32 points33 points ago

Australian buses and trains

[–]LeopoldTheLlama 31 points32 points ago

And the good ole US of A

[–]Wolfmade 15 points16 points ago

Even Estonia!

[–]Shinasti 14 points15 points ago

German buses as well

[–]JasonGD1982 39 points40 points ago

I'm going to go ahead and confirm that bus seats everywhere look the same.

[–]sorrowborn 27 points28 points ago

I live everywhere and I can confirm this confirmation.

[–]stan_le_panda 11 points12 points ago

no in beautiful mother korea lord high perfect ruler make train seats gold with nations infinite wealth. made for the people to counteract the west and their decadence. hail korea.

[–]denemigen 9 points10 points ago

Most of Hungary too.

[–]LadyLollerskates 17 points18 points ago

And the UK!

[–]kaiyotic 5 points6 points ago

and belgian busses/trams and newer trains.

[–]spectralnischay 3 points4 points ago

Faroe Islands here, I can confirm

[–]OrangeWool 2 points3 points ago

Don't forget China, Russia, and India!

[–]ColdAffinity 4 points5 points ago

Really? The TTC (Toronto) has theirs red.

[–]Tofu24 4 points5 points ago

The seats in YRT and Viva buses are this exact configuration of colour fuckery.

[–]Hapistoric 48 points49 points ago

Perfect drawing of the bus seats in our city

[–]trishypohta 123 points124 points ago

I see people in that design. Lots and lots of people.

[–]Sinnic 69 points70 points ago

Half of them have dongs or boobs.. Not even kidding.

[–]darkevilemu 39 points40 points ago

And one of them is projectile vomiting.

[–]sexlexia_survivor 20 points21 points ago

Found him!

[–]N69sZelda 5 points6 points ago

for the lazy - near the bottom of the right chair. By the orange box

edit: i am being told there are possibly mutliple ones vomiting. The most obvious one may be on the right chair in the very center.

[–]Ugbrog 3 points4 points ago

No way. Right chair, left side, about halfway up.

[–]Gravyness 3 points4 points ago

Funny enough, there's 3 of them in each seat.

[–]HeatherMarMal 4 points5 points ago

Naked dancers

[–]deltarob 64 points65 points ago

mine just have faux wood and leather http://i.imgur.com/xNUK3.jpg

[–]Fr4t 141 points142 points ago

Woah, I feel like I'm paying a fortune just looking at this pic.

[–]deltarob 6 points7 points ago

not THAT expensive really

[–]medahman 18 points19 points ago

Looks comfy as fuck

[–]big_slammu 7 points8 points ago

Is this by any chance the black cat bus?

[–]deltarob 4 points5 points ago

it is indeed

[–]10z20Luka 30 points31 points ago

Man, I absolutely love looking at the interiors of other city buses. It's like travelling to another country.

My buses for ya. http://i.imgur.com/ukQGu.jpg

[–]ukiyoe 4 points5 points ago

People are slobs!

[–]DemeGeek 3 points4 points ago

Looks like a bus in Vancouver... is it?

[–]10z20Luka 2 points3 points ago

Ottawa. Got the country down, at least.

[–]DemeGeek 5 points6 points ago

Damn... at least I know now that Translink isn't too imaginative...

[–]undearius 4 points5 points ago

OC -.-

... I'm not even going to say any more

[–]UnicornerCorn 2 points3 points ago

http://i.imgur.com/X6IAF.jpg Looks kind of like the buses in my city. Sorry for bad picture it was the best I could find. It doesn't seem to hide stains well...Since i've seen a lot of brown/black stains.

[–]vegeto079 49 points50 points ago

[–]skyclaw 32 points33 points ago

Depends on what you think it is

[–]luopjiggy 28 points29 points ago

Totally one stick figure jerking it onto another.

[–]username_was_taken 8 points9 points ago

Standard bus-experience portraits.

[–]gusgoodface 23 points24 points ago

That's a nice-ass bus

[–]jhc1415 13 points14 points ago

[–]TomChesterson 11 points12 points ago

Are those karma sutra positions?

[–]asherrd 18 points19 points ago

can't tell if pun or doesn't know it is kama sutra

[–]TomChesterson 9 points10 points ago

We'll just go ahead and say pun.

[–]MattRix 6 points7 points ago

Mississauga Transit ("MiWay") bus seats: http://farm7.staticflickr.com/6238/6336533326_143934cd4e_b.jpg

Yep, they're pretty much identical.

[–]EatsHerVeggies 8 points9 points ago

THANK YOU! Every single time I get on a bus I have the same averse reaction to the bizarre, squigglybarf seat cushions. They always seem to be the same day-glo colors, too. I have often wondered if they're all designed by the same person-- like, there's one guy in the world who's the go-to guy when your bus company needs seats, and he's obsessed with Wham and Milli Vanilli and just channels that into his creative process. I mean, it's not like they couldn't get the same stain-hiding efficiency from some simple neutrals like the rest of the carpet world does..

[–]antifolkhero 10 points11 points ago

More like, "we need the cheapest possible material we can use for public bus seats. Buy whatever you can find that nobody else wants and haggle them down from there.

[–]KHANanaphone 5 points6 points ago

Seats in Edmonton: "ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS ETS"

[–]RzK 6 points7 points ago

I was hoping to find an expert on bus seat covers in the comments

[–]AckAckAckAckAckAck 11 points12 points ago

as a resident of DC... yes.

[–]wetsandwiches 11 points12 points ago

as a resident of London... quite

[–]wooooood 3 points4 points ago

I've been on a bus with those seat covers before!

[–]rooomatethaw 3 points4 points ago

is that where they stole the design for theater carpet!

[–]Centru 3 points4 points ago

Let's destroy the shagohod, gotta love hiimdaisy

[–]shitwhore 3 points4 points ago

Didn't know this design was universal!

[–]Janky_Pants 3 points4 points ago

No, that is for a '98 Dodge Neon.

[–]hitlechro 3 points4 points ago

I thought this was just Mississauga, Canada

[–]WcDeckel 17 points18 points ago

i laughed too hard at this...

[–]Freddie_AppsHero 0 points1 point ago

Yep, looks like the train seats in Melbourne.

Attention: anybody who works in the public transport field. Why the squiggly fuckin' lines and circles and shit?

[–]Reedey 7 points8 points ago

It's so graffiti doesn't show up.

[–]LightBerry81 2 points3 points ago

I thought LA City Buses where the only ones!!!

[–]Outofmany 2 points3 points ago

Could it be that gasp Americans and Europeans are empathizing with each other?

[–]left-field 2 points3 points ago

Now gentlemen, we shall double our profits by using this to carpet bowling alleys.

[–]Alphapix 2 points3 points ago

I can't stop lauging at how true this is.

[–]Animal89 2 points3 points ago

they are made to look like shit so everything else that gets on them blends in

[–]goofandaspoof 2 points3 points ago

Hey don't knock it. I've gotten hours of "entertainment" analyzing the patterns on individual seats. It's like cloud watching.

[–]LookAtLeo 2 points3 points ago

Most bus seat covers all over the world are this design. I used to think it was just my city until I went travelling.

[–]Rebbawskaced 4 points5 points ago

This is the best one of these I have seen.

[–]raybert 3 points4 points ago

What's next? Seats with googly eyes?

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

I have never understood why they aren't pleather or some other non adsorbent material. I don't want to sit on someone else's soaked in smell and juices.

[–]kubina1 0 points1 point ago

..but there was dignity in plastic seats that day.

[–]smellslikerape 0 points1 point ago

All I can see is a duck on a leash

[–]sugarfalls4eva 0 points1 point ago

Penn state buses. But I think they did it the other way around. Confetti to solid. Maybe I remember backwards. Also, their new buses are so quiet. I'm glad I'm not near there, it would be that classic bus slam scene but without the sound.

[–]eyecite 1 point2 points ago

I've seen other comics like this, does anyone know where I can find a set of them?

[–]mrpopenfresh 0 points1 point ago

I'm sure there were some serious studies behind this pattern, as if it somehow hides stains and grime better than anything else.