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all 196 comments

[–]bijan4187 170 points171 points ago

fuckin dad dicks man

[–]ANAL_QUEEN 133 points134 points ago

They're always huge.

[–]Leo-D 130 points131 points ago

[–]immawsome 80 points81 points ago

[–]GFandango 18 points19 points ago

this one is disturbing

[–]Doesnt_Get_Irony 7 points8 points ago

Probably from the fact that she is looking up at someone while holding a leg as we talk about dad dicks. She is also really into it.

[–]shuritsen 4 points5 points ago

Yes, and let's also forget the fact that's she's probably 3 years old.

[–]COXIMUS 0 points1 point ago

No

[–]vofgofm33 95 points96 points ago

that was a risky click

[–]Istanbul200 47 points48 points ago

It was purple for me, and i kind of figured I haven't clicked on any dick pictures lately, so was relatively safe for me.

[–]omeyy 18 points19 points ago

speak for yourself

[–]Istanbul200 16 points17 points ago

Makin' a habit of clicking dick pictures? =P

[–]omeyy 13 points14 points ago

that was supposed to mean I click everything and anything, my fault

[–]Istanbul200 5 points6 points ago

So manly ;_;

[–]nachtophilia 6 points7 points ago

So brave O_O

[–]frazier6567 -2 points-1 points ago

No, no it wasn't at all.

[–]scrappydoofan -4 points-3 points ago

le risky click D:

[–]Boomanchu 11 points12 points ago

Well, seeing as ANAL_QUEEN frequently contributes to /r/incest and has/had an incest blog, I don't know why anyone is surprised.

[–]Grazsrootz 2 points3 points ago

burrrrnnn

[–]VersatileLight -1 points0 points ago

I did not see that.

[–]The-Dudemeister 0 points1 point ago

If I remember correctly, this girl is into incest so it makes sense.

[–]A7X4REVer 1 point2 points ago

He must have had the Premium Holy Shit package.

[–]JTDeuce 0 points1 point ago

I feel like they were larger in the '80s and '90s.

[–]pa3 0 points1 point ago

Anal queen would know

[–]praskit 0 points1 point ago

Who's your daddy?

[–]Fnarley 1 point2 points ago

As a father I can confirm this.

[–]nommytorton 0 points1 point ago

Officially my least favorite Reddit comment ever.

[–]lisan_al_gaib 10 points11 points ago

Well now I can't stop thinking about incest.

[–]colandme[S] 26 points27 points ago

Incest is wincest.

[–]Knary50 1 point2 points ago

Sam and Dean huh ?

[–]my_moms_a_milf 1 point2 points ago

It's a beautiful thing yes.

[–]lisan_al_gaib 0 points1 point ago

Seriously, it consumed my day.

[–]Upper_Cunting 1 point2 points ago

If you have girl problems I feel bad for you son, I got 99 problems but dad's dick ain't one.

[–]EXCITED_BY_DOWNVOTES 25 points26 points ago

YEAH, GO SUCK IT U FUCKER

[–]complex_reduction 3 points4 points ago

Do you people know how many "I want downvotes" novelty accounts exist? It's fucking old. It's boring. Find a new thing.

[–]EXCITED_BY_DOWNVOTES 26 points27 points ago

FIND A NEW COCK TO SUCK ON

[–]tha_dood 9 points10 points ago

You do realize you have more upvotes than downvotes right? Why the fuck are you so excited? You should really be quite lethargic by now, which is everyone's goal because your novelty account sucks.

[–]Strikingly_Oblivious 18 points19 points ago

Why would anyone want downvotes?

[–]tha_dood 8 points9 points ago

See, here is a man who actually uses his novelty account correctly.

[–]GGWithrow 2 points3 points ago

Twist - Same dude.

[–]zorithma -2 points-1 points ago

Directed by M. Night Shyamalan.

[–]xSARGEx117x 0 points1 point ago

You are strikingly oblivious...

[–]Strikingly_Oblivious 1 point2 points ago

Strikingly oblivious to what?

[–]ObidiahWTFJerwalk -2 points-1 points ago

Just move along. Nothing to see here. Novelty account in the process of failing. Give it 24 hours and it'll go away.

[–]Dvdrummer360 2 points3 points ago

Guys... Don't upvote, don't downvote. Just keep it at 1...

[–]Disaronno 0 points1 point ago

Even better, keep it at 0?

[–]Dvdrummer360 -1 points0 points ago

Nah, that's a downvote. Just leave it at 1, it means everybody ignored it.

[–]dubcostanza 91 points92 points ago

I can't wait til I have a dad dick.

[–]deagle2012 35 points36 points ago

I have one. Trust me, it's gotten me into more trouble than it's worth.

[–]whatevers_clever 30 points31 points ago

how much is it worth

[–]omeyy 66 points67 points ago

tree fiddy

[–]beatlesfan18 9 points10 points ago

It was about that time I noticed omeyy was about eight stories tall and was a crustacean from the Paleozoic era.

[–]srd178 -1 points0 points ago

(about)

[–]affectus 1 point2 points ago

I await the answer to the all important question.

[–]brownonrice 3 points4 points ago

42

[–]Irishfanbuck 1 point2 points ago

Impotent

FTFY

[–]malicious_swine 0 points1 point ago

You never know until the net worth of the spawn is fully realized.

[–]mlsweeney 118 points119 points ago

[NSFW]A father and his daughter were taking a shower together and the daughter looks between her dad's legs. "What's that daddy?", said the daughter. "That's a penis honey." "Will I ever get one?" "Yes, as soon as your mother leaves for work."

[–]Atheistus 33 points34 points ago

go on

[–]frisky123 9 points10 points ago

I'm sure if you went to some truck stops in your area you could find one relatively soon!

[–]HeyImAlex 5 points6 points ago

It won't be the same man. Dad dicks in the late 80s early 90s, they were bigger! I think there's something shrinking dad dicks, that should be on 20/20

[–]Eab123 100 points101 points ago

Just saw my dads accidentally. I'm 25 and I can't get over it mentally. To be fair he used to wipe my ass. But that was like 3 weeks ago.

[–]MissAwesome89 43 points44 points ago

When I saw my dads I couldn't stop seeing it in my mind. I guess because I was trying with all my might to delete that memory that my asshole brain was like "Hey, you haven't thought about your dads dick all day. Remember it?"

[–]Eab123 15 points16 points ago

Why does everybody have a "saw my dads penis" story. I see it at least once every seven years. It's the unholy chapters of my life.

[–]Hawdon 28 points29 points ago

I really don't understand people phobia about seeing their family members naked. Really, it's completely natural and there is nothing wrong with it then its non sexual! On the other hand, I have been going naked into the sauna with my whole family every Friday for the past 20 years, so it might just be a cultural thing...

[–]MiRiOf 7 points8 points ago

Silly and non sexual.

[–]Macgyverer -5 points-4 points ago

I guess everyone here is new

[–]Eab123 12 points13 points ago

It's Definetly a culture thing. We all associate (except for you sauna man) nudity with sex. I don't want to think about my parents and sex. It's uncomfortable.

[–]MyAlt_Has_1000_Karma 10 points11 points ago

We all don't. It's cultural.

[–]kantorekB14 11 points12 points ago

Americans and their fucking puritanical society, they're so repressed they have nightmares over naked family members.

[–]sir_wooly_merkins 13 points14 points ago

Of course we also make all the porn about everything porny conceivable porn. Go to church, don't think about your parents naked, fuck a goat dressed like Lincoln. Merka.

[–]Arionia 4 points5 points ago

I just walked out of the shower yesterday, waving my dinga dong and my sister walks and sees me. Know what I did? I asked if she had seen my green yellow button shirt. She hadn't. I walked to the living room and picked up my pants and put them on and we continued on with our lives, like people should do.

[–]Eab123 -1 points0 points ago

yeah except if I did that my sister would scream and not talk to me for weeks. I'd like to be apart of your family but I'm not.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Eab123 -3 points-2 points ago

Bro I'm neck deep in it and hating every moment.

[–]andy921 2 points3 points ago

"We all" means us Americans. Sometimes we forget other people exist. When we do remember them, they never really seem to count quite the same as human beings.

[–]TechnoJedi 1 point2 points ago

Best I can do is, I dunno, 3/5. Non-Americans are like 3/5 human.

[–]Eab123 -2 points-1 points ago

What?

[–]Mindwraith 2 points3 points ago

My parents have recently gotten to the "pooping with the door open"/"walking from the shower to the bedroom naked" phase of their marriage. I see each of them naked at least once a week..

[–]downvotethisnow -2 points-1 points ago

That is not normal.

[–]Vlyn 1 point2 points ago

STOP IT! The memories, ahhh!

And hell, did it just look so huge because I was so small? >.< I'll never know!

[–]ccrazool 20 points21 points ago

To be fair he used it to wipe my ass

What I read at first glance

[–]Eab123 2 points3 points ago

It's cool he did that too.

[–]Auflodern 0 points1 point ago

I thought that was the joke

[–]Zuanism 46 points47 points ago

He wiped your ass 3 weeks ago?

[–]redrhyski 13 points14 points ago

I upvoted you, because that's what I read too.

[–]Steaksauce 21 points22 points ago

Thought it was a joke.

[–]Croscoe 0 points1 point ago

Yea I'm pretty sure it was lol.

[–]catsfive 0 points1 point ago

Either way, we agree, so, whew. Upvote.

[–]Eab123 -1 points0 points ago

Yeeeeeeessssssss

[–]SonicFlash01 9 points10 points ago

Not sure if:
- Everything was innocent and you simply recollected that when you were a baby he was the one that changed your diaper
- He was wiping your ass three weeks ago
- He wiped your ass with his dick and you accidentally saw it

Please clear this up for me.

[–]Eab123 3 points4 points ago

The second choice. It was a joke but I didn't word it as well as I a should have. Now it just looks like sloppy writing.

[–]P_Charming 37 points38 points ago

If you're asking for help on Yahoo questions, you're not a normal girl.

[–]4chan- 47 points48 points ago

If you have to start your question off with

"I'm a normal girl, but"

you're not a normal girl

[–]meatwad75892 12 points13 points ago

"No disrespect, but..."

Anything following that will be full of dickery.

[–]Kat_The_Friendly_Spy 12 points13 points ago

No disrespect but your hair looks fabulous today.

[–]PirateNixon 7 points8 points ago

You're a dick.

[–]imitationcrabmeat 2 points3 points ago

My brother once told me that nothing anyone ever says before the word 'but' really counts.

[–]I_Glow 5 points6 points ago

Is your brother named Game of Thrones?

[–]tehgreatblade -3 points-2 points ago

No offense, but please fucking kill yourself you stupid piece of shit.

[–]thegreatwhitemenace 2 points3 points ago

none taken its cool bro

[–]Kai________ 21 points22 points ago

Or you are 13.

[–]whatevers_clever 27 points28 points ago

or 30. And a dude.

[–]winkandthegun 7 points8 points ago

I'm convinced that the only reason people use Yahoo Answers is to create material to post on websites like Reddit.

[–]cleetus76 4 points5 points ago

I checked out her profile - she's quite active there and she seems to have a thing for her dad.

[–]malicious_swine 0 points1 point ago

Actually I've found it's useful for solving software problems. Having a difficulty with your install of Assassin's Creed III? Type in the exact error message you get on google and click the Yahoo! answers response.

[–]wiltedbouquet -1 points0 points ago

The generic default user icon for this response is perfect.

Your dad :D

[–]DrPingu76 41 points42 points ago

Stupid sexy Dad.

[–]xmyno 21 points22 points ago

There's even a report abuse button on that page. What a foresight!

[–]hampockets 24 points25 points ago

Boy Scout Rule of D's.
She must show her dad her penis!

[–]brickell 16 points17 points ago

Set balance back to the universe.

[–]Jeffhole 1 point2 points ago

This is the only thing that makes any sense.

Also one of my favourite workaholic scene.

"You saw another dude's dick, didn't you?"

[–]brickell 2 points3 points ago

Yes it's hilarious! the freaking music they were playing in the background.... Kills me every time.

[–]mikaosol 15 points16 points ago

Not worse than Mom Vaginas. My philosophy on those: I came out of it, then I never want to see it again. Then again, the same principle goes with dad dicks I guess.

[–]ANAL_QUEEN 9 points10 points ago

Well at least when you have one, you know what it looks like. A dick looks like it's going to jump you.

[–]mrpotatoes 15 points16 points ago

We've been around very different vaginas my friend.

[–]Da_zero_kid 14 points15 points ago

It's so angry!

[–]Vladimir_Putins_Cock 1 point2 points ago

There are some angry vaginas in this world

[–]ObidiahWTFJerwalk 0 points1 point ago

Did it bare it's fangs and look like it was going to bite you?

[–]mrpotatoes 2 points3 points ago

[–]laprincesapeach 5 points6 points ago

I feel a new AMA coming along

[–]WEASEL_DEVOURER 18 points19 points ago

If you havin girl problems I feel bad for you, son.

[–]exsubdawn 20 points21 points ago

I got 99 problems but the dick ain't one...

[–]myhipsi 1 point2 points ago

I've got bigdickproblems

[–]markiv_hahaha 19 points20 points ago

Can't relate to any post in it ಥ_ಥ

[–]matt2884 12 points13 points ago

Even though a lot of Freud's theories are wrong, once in a while the internet just makes you wonder.

[–]ataraxic89 8 points9 points ago

Freude was nuts. Dont mean some bitches wont be cravin dad dick though.

[–]thegreatwhitemenace 1 point2 points ago

you can't blame him though. Freud's mom has got it going on.

[–]ANAL_QUEEN 11 points12 points ago

And that was how Deena Lockers had sex with Her father.

[–]thegreatwhitemenace 0 points1 point ago

and she was such a normal girl...

[–]Herpdederperson 0 points1 point ago

My god

[–]appoaf 0 points1 point ago

Good one Tom Hanks!

[–]I_can_only_say_PENIS 1 point2 points ago

PENIS

[–]Bholl92 -1 points0 points ago

Way to go, Yahoo Answers!

[–]AquaSquaw 2 points3 points ago

[–]Itsa_Picasso24 -1 points0 points ago

The repliers avatar makes it all :D

[–]70melbatoast -1 points0 points ago

I was thinking this was going to be a joke about a .

[–]jonathanalejos22 -1 points0 points ago

Great advice Tom Hanks.

[–]Industrialbonecraft -1 points0 points ago

Electra complex....

[–]PotatoDonki -1 points0 points ago

A penis is bothering my mind..?

[–]redjello -1 points0 points ago

Welcome to the violentacrez anon support group!

[–]snazzycarpet -1 points0 points ago

Scouts rule of D's

[–]gssunil -1 points0 points ago

Wincest.

[–]WalterWhite_Jr 2 points3 points ago

Seeing my dads dick was not nearly as traumatizing as tasting it.

[–]moojj 0 points1 point ago

In that context the default face on yahoo answers looks so fucking creepy!

[–]ravelle 0 points1 point ago

Holy shit, this post is old, too old for a repost even.

[–]shuritsen 0 points1 point ago

Daddy issues for the rest of her life.

[–]nomanoid 0 points1 point ago

Love the way his avatar completes the message with a sick smile.

[–]easysheep 0 points1 point ago

Well Freud would love to hear about this..

[–]masterpupil 0 points1 point ago

replying to that question= "How to screw up someone who couldn't possibly be anymore screwed up"

[–]michealn 0 points1 point ago

I feel bad for you son, I got 99 problems but a dick ain't one.

[–]mayrataylor 0 points1 point ago

sounds like the bf is much smaller

[–]Gibb0nat0r 0 points1 point ago

Bad luck Brian has the same problem.

[–]ScratchBomb 0 points1 point ago

there are some events that you should suppress and never share with anyone... not even the internet. denial can be a useful tool.

[–]ThisDudeRiteHere -3 points-2 points ago

Anyone seeking more info might also check here:

title comnts points age /r/
Girl problems... 34coms 712pts 3hrs funny
Is a penis bothering your mind? 3coms 13pts 11hrs funny

source: karmadecay

[–]Hoosier2016 -1 points0 points ago

The repost is strong with this one...

[–]8luh8bluh -1 points0 points ago

has anyone else heard that john oliver routine?

[–]mandatoryseaworld -1 points0 points ago

Where's breadfriend when you need him?

[–]AcidMind -2 points-1 points ago

workaholics related http://youtu.be/J6Nf8oR_YrU

[–]Dookiestain_LaFlair -1 points0 points ago

The long and mighty penis of her father will hang low between his knees, and she will hear the pained and pleasured screams of her mother throughout the night.

[–]Hermes5 -2 points-1 points ago

Miss Lockers, Sigmund Freud's on the phone for you.

[–]corrupta -2 points-1 points ago

I grew up with hippy parents. I'm surprised I didn't see my dads friends dicks. Scarring childhoods aside, I would totally not post something like this with my real name on it. The internet never forgets and never sleeps.

[–]Paladout 0 points1 point ago

nice try, dad.

[–]loveypower -3 points-2 points ago

suicide, is the only alternative.

[–]Upper_Cunting 0 points1 point ago

4chan here with some friendly advise.