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1781
1782

You, are just, a toy. (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by Speeedo

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[–]fentonfenton 126 points127 points ago

Commas, you're, doing it, wrong.

[–]Houndie 40 points41 points ago

I think OP is trying to emulate the way Woody said the line to Buzz (assuming this was a line from Toy Story).

YOU...ARE JUST...A TOY!!!

[–]DTX120 31 points32 points ago

Would work better if he had the quote right.

[–]Clydeicus 11 points12 points ago

It's like... if you're already on the internet posting this, why aren't you taking the extra half a minute to make sure you have the quote right?

AND HOW THE HELL DO YOU GET THIS QUOTE WRONG

[–]Nelo112 1 point2 points ago

What's the right quote?

[–]DTX120 15 points16 points ago

It's just "YOU ARE A TOY!"

[–]gumbercules6 -1 points0 points ago

Maybe he is trying to quote Sex Toy Story. "you are a woman's plaything?"

[–]DTX120 3 points4 points ago

Sex Toy Story

I'd, buy that, for, a dollar.

[–]tbscotty68 2 points3 points ago

Agreed, OP should have used ellipses.

[–]mrdeadsniper 2 points3 points ago

Agreed, OP deserves epilepsy.

[–]sexgott -1 points0 points ago

Do html-entites work in titles? I know they do in comments: … (…)

[–]MrMagpie93 -1 points0 points ago

OP is a sad sad cowboy. But he has my pitty

[–]serialcereal 0 points1 point ago

I think you meant OP is a sad, strange little man, and he has your pity.

Farewell

[–]musickfreak 1 point2 points ago

You a toy!

[–]celestialwolf -1 points0 points ago

Don't upvote posts with bad grammar or punctuation; it just encourages them.

[–]nicko378 -4 points-3 points ago

Those commas gave me cancer

[–]PerniciousVerisimili -5 points-4 points ago

http://imgur.com/nYOBb relevant

[–]pjt37 15 points16 points ago

The fuck is going on with this punctuation.

[–]HamproOne 7 points8 points ago

The fuck is! going on with, this punctuation.

[–]moarlongcatplox2 3 points4 points ago

That was; painful to read?

[–]A_Mouse_In_Da_House 1 point2 points ago

The. Fuck is? gOING o`n with [this] quote"

[–]lydocia 14 points15 points ago

I read this in the voice of Malcolm in the Middle's Stevie.

[–]DESTROYER3264 3 points4 points ago

The commas forced it.

[–]saarlac 4 points5 points ago

The more I think about this whole thing the more I feel like it's for the best. Disney is not in the habit of allowing changes to established works. Hopefully we will not be subjected to any more "Han shot first" crap.

[–]IceRay42 -2 points-1 points ago

No, but they are in the business of monetizing their investment, and you don't need look any further than Pixar's schedule to realize how this could be a bad thing. Pixar's record was near sterling before the Disney buyout, and with the exception of Up (which was already in production at the time of purchase), I can't say that Disney has been a good thing for Pixar. They HAVE to come out with a movie once a year now, and the results?

Up: Spectacular movie, but really only benefited from House of Mouse marketing money, and is primarily a Pixar-only baby.

Toy Story 3: Admittedly the best of the rest of the bunch, but a sequel.

Cars 2: Sequel, near abysmal by Pixar standards too.

Brave: Decent film (again in Pixar-ese, this translates to below average), but the story reeks of Classic Disney Princess tale instead of the unique charm and wit we're used to from Pixar.

Monsters University: I wont pass judgment on quality, but...Sequel.

So Disney can lay claim on one GOOD movie, against three sequels. Now, I'll be the first to admit that Pixar's Golden Run had to end sometime (it still boggles my mind that one studio could release so many fantastic movies in a row), but from an analysis standpoint, the only factor that changed between Pixar's run of excellence and this newfound sequel churning stretch of mediocrity is that now they have to make back what Disney paid for them.

TL;DR: Episode VII is a lot more likely to turn out like recent Pixar productions.

[–]theBMXbandit 6 points7 points ago

TL;DR: Episode VII is a lot more likely to turn out like recent Pixar productions.

SO in other words fifty quadrillion times better than the garbage Lucas produced, otherwise known as episodes 1 - 3?

[–]borkborkbork 2 points3 points ago

So, Disney buys Pixar and makes a bunch of pretty decent sequels. Any future star wars movies made by anybody will, by definition, be sequels. What exactly is the problem here?

[–]IceRay42 -3 points-2 points ago

You're taking the sequel issue out of context. Prior to Disney, Pixar had only produced ONE sequel. That one sequel was supposed to be (surprise!) a Disney project for direct to video sales, which they were unhappy with prior to John Lasseter swooping in and remaking it into a full cinematic release. So sans Disney's influence, Pixar has only a host of original stories, and it was something of a staple for them. However, since Disney bought them out, they've effectively only produced sequels, because they're good for merchandising, brand recognition and (surprise again!) monetizing Disney's investment, thus moving away from Pixar's hallmark.

And I'm using that as evidence that Disney doesn't give the first two shits about what is "established works" for Star Wars. Of course any film made will be a sequel, but Disney just paid 4 billion dollars (and 40 million shares of stock to Lucas himself) to acquire Lucasfilm. They didn't do it for funsies, and they certainly didn't do it because they're fans of the canon that hate what Lucas has done to the franchise. They did it because they want to use that brand recognition to make fistfuls of cash, and if they have to gut and further embarrass the Star Wars universe to do it, they're going to; and they'll do it without shedding a tear.

[–]borkborkbork 0 points1 point ago

Maybe. Maybe not. IMO Disney has a much more trust-inspiring record on this than Lucas himself does. If their plan is to release a new movie every couple of years, I expect that most of them will be pretty good, and occasionally one of them won't be. I'll be amazed if any of them reach the depths of shit that Lucas's prequels managed though. You really have to have a talent for making garbage to do movies that badly.

[–]Luminair 1 point2 points ago

You're saying that Pixar's "golden age" is done because they produced one "bad" movie, and one "decent" movie? Pixar took a chance on a new director for Brave. She was fired during production because the project was literally shit, and was not moving. Mark Andrews' words regarding it in terms of Pixar quality were, "You should have seen how it was before I took over".

Pixar has four original stories in production currently (The Good Dinosaur, Pete Docter's Untitled Pixar Movie that Takes You Inside the Mind, an Untitled new film for 2015, The Untitled Pixar Movie About Día de los Muertos), and one sequel (Finding Nemo 2). I am excluding Monster's U as you've already mentioned it.

Let's fast it, these movies make cash. Disney an Pixar are stupid not to take advantage of that - particularly with the Cars merchandising, Cars land - it is simply too popular with their young male audience. Despite its poor critical reception, it still has made $560 million. Leverage that against John Carter. Part of the Pixar acquisition is that the studios operate separately - their only common ground is that they get a larger budget from Disney, and that Lasseter has a chair in both offices. Have some faith, Pixar's golden days are far from over.

[–]IceRay42 -3 points-2 points ago

I don't think Pixar is done making good movies, I'm just highlighting that I don't think much good will come of Disney acquiring Lucasfilm. They don't spend 4 billion dollars for kicks and giggles, they do it to make even bigger returns, and I doubt very seriously that they're eager to sit around and wait to make that money back.

[–]Luminair 1 point2 points ago

And that's why we're getting a new Star Wars trilogy before 2020 - the films print money. Disney has already said it's a tentpole production that they're playing close to the vest. With 40+ years behind it, they know they're screwed if they tarnish it. But anything is better than Phantom, so go right ahead in my book.

[–]Actually_Doesnt_Care 0 points1 point ago

Wreck it Ralph looks cool.

[–]IceRay42 0 points1 point ago

Wreck It Ralph exists in a strange place. A couple things

1) It's not a product of Pixar Studios. It's just a Disney film.

2) It is Executive Produced by John Lasseter, who is a member of the trio to whom Pixar owes so much of it's greatness. He directed Toy Story, A Bug's Life, singlehandedly rescued Toy Story 2 from a direct-to-video disaster, and Cars. His track record is spectacular, and it certainly looks like Wreck It Ralph has benefitted from his help. It may turn out to be more Pixaresque in nature than recent Pixar films, without the benefit of actually being a Pixar production.

[–]Actually_Doesnt_Care 0 points1 point ago

I'm excited for it! :P

[–]saarlac -2 points-1 points ago

Oh don't get me wrong here. I fully expect Episode VII to be a smoking turd. I just hope we don't have to see the original trilogy butchered any further. I just think Disney may respect them more as works of art and refuse to alter them further. I honestly hope we finally get proper archival quality releases of the theatrical cuts. It seems more likely now with the property in the hands of Disney's money machine than it had been under Lucas and his seeming departure from the planet as we know it.

[–]JustLoggedInForThis 0 points1 point ago

Disney is not in the habit of allowing changes to established works.

-I thought this was pretty much their business model?

Disney has changed, warped and arguable ruined original fairytales since 1927, and turned them all into boring, toothless and soppy happy-ending children-stories. Lion King (1994) was the first story Disney claimed to be original (and even here tons were borrowed from Kimba The White Lion)

http://voices.yahoo.com/how-disney-damages-fairy-tales-historical-folklore-608967.html

http://www.fpx.de/fp/Disney/Tales/

http://www.curiousread.com/2007/12/4-original-fairy-tales-endings-before.html

"Disney has released 51 animated films under its signature banner. Of those 51, thirty rely on public domain, sixteen are based off of other works that Disney purchased the rights too, and just five have been original stories to Disney. "The Lion King" (film number 32) was their first original story! " http://www.crapmykidswatch.com/2012/08/the-lion-king.html

edit: link & qoute

[–]jakethesnakebooboo 3 points4 points ago

The Lion King is not original. It is a story from an otherwise unknown playwright. The original was called "Hamlet" or something dumb like that.

[–]braindead_rebel 0 points1 point ago

Lion King wasn't even original, it borrowed heavily from Hamlet.

[–]oaknyc 4 points5 points ago

to the death star and beyond

[–]kuatsimoto 3 points4 points ago

Don't mess with Solo, Disney. You can fuck Luke. You can fuck Leah. But you can't fuck Solo.

[–]pseusonym 0 points1 point ago

All it takes is a hand

[–]FuckYeahPeanutButter 2 points3 points ago

HAN SHOT FIRST!

[–]catsonwheels 2 points3 points ago

No but seriously han shot first

[–]RoyaleWithCheeze -1 points0 points ago

Star Command?

[–]A_Mouse_In_Da_House 0 points1 point ago

Star citizen.

[–]hmatmotu -1 points0 points ago

Yeah, he's just Princess Leia's boy toy.

[–]Ree81 -1 points0 points ago

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=uoB_MDSkHms

[–]Mistersinister1 0 points1 point ago

Ive said this to many women. They didnt think it was funny nor did they get the reference, further reinforcing said quote

[–]brootwarst 1 point2 points ago

COMMA LEVEL: GEM

[–]Patrickfoster -1 points0 points ago

Well, that just, like, your opinion, man.

[–]WorthyOpponent 0 points1 point ago

commas are not elipses - grammar, is not, a game

[–]deflagrator 0 points1 point ago

hopefully there isn't a snake in his boot

[–]gunstar69 0 points1 point ago

I guess george lucas has milked as much as he can from the star wars franchise.

[–]ImplodingDreams 0 points1 point ago

I legitimately started crying when i saw this. please keep the bad mouse away.

[–]LurpdOUT 0 points1 point ago

http://theresasnakeinmyboot.com

[–]parkertonsloanworth 1 point2 points ago

This made me laugh way to hard...

[–]Tnoel212 1 point2 points ago

I wonder if Disney will sneak the Pizza Planet truck into the Star Wars movies.

[–]diegroblers -1 points0 points ago

Before I clicked on the comments, I made a bet that the top comment will be about commas...

[–]Richie_16 0 points1 point ago

He never shot first...

[–]gumbercules6 -1 points0 points ago

Reminds me of woody from Sex Toy Story

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_p0V2Vbl22U&feature=youtube_gdata_player

[–]tsrkempton 0 points1 point ago

A child's play thing!

[–]dfnExp 0 points1 point ago

This is an awesome image.

[–]pintopete 0 points1 point ago

You're not the real Han Solo! You're just an action figure! You are a CHILD'S PLAY THING!

[–]scaturbator 0 points1 point ago

i didnt choose the mickey mouse club lifestyle, the mickey mouse club lifestyle chose me

[–]solsethop 1 point2 points ago

Buzz shot first!

[–]_shazbot_ -2 points-1 points ago

cntrl + f "shot first", was/wasn't disappointed

[–]cndianbacon 1 point2 points ago

Toy Story is Pixar, not Disney

[–]karmafox 0 points1 point ago

This isnt funny or clever.

[–]GoodGuyshiny -1 points0 points ago

Get fucked. Really. This is not even silly just played out and stupid. Also fuck you for using han solo. You really should be ashamed.

[–]MisterHandagote 6 points7 points ago

Do I hear the soft rustling of Jimmies?

[–]GoodGuyshiny -2 points-1 points ago

Jimmies always intact.

[–]machpe -2 points-1 points ago

intact and rustled

FTFY

[–]GoodGuyshiny -2 points-1 points ago

Intact. Also this is reddit please dont pretend.

[–]Havok74 0 points1 point ago

It's pronounced Yid-Nay!

[–]Neyubin 1 point2 points ago

"YOU... ARE... A... TOY!!! You aren't the real Han Solo! You're a-- Aw, you're an action figure! You are a child's plaything!"

I would pay money for a poster size version of this.

[–]ViviGruenblatt 0 points1 point ago

Is it just me or are you on the front page of /r/funny twice?

[–]brandontoms 1 point2 points ago

Your use, of commas, gave me, cancer.

[–]Solkre 0 points1 point ago

The quote is.

"You, Are, A, Toyyeeee!"

[–]buzzdady 0 points1 point ago

Sweet, I own Woody and Han now? Who would've thought simply having that name would get me free things!

[–]The_Iron_Derp 0 points1 point ago

You are one sad little Han.

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