Every time I go to a coffee shop... [FIXED]

nigrodamus7 · 3 months

Get in that ass Larry!

Brock_Obama · 3 months

Some vanilla bullshit latte cappa thing.

sittty · 3 months

link to scene. warning: may die of laughter.

HardlyWorkinDBA · 3 months

and draw a dick in the foam so i can get some karma.

original-finder · 3 months

Original Submission (100%): Every time I go to a coffee shop... [D]

Posted: 1h before this post by Reistall (fixed by LOVES_TO_POOP)

This comment generated by an automated bot. Is this match wrong?

21007 · 3 months

/r/funny needs more larry david

ryanlindly · 3 months

I like to order expresso. No one has ever corrected me, but if they did my reply would only be to say, "But, I want it fast."

david-me · 3 months

I learned "Iced Caffe Mocha" 15 years ago. I've never had anything else.

agent3613 · 3 months

It's a cafe latte?... What is that... milk? - Milk and coffee! Who would've thought? Milk and coffee! Oh my God. What a drink! It's milk and coffee, mixed together!

awildstanleyappears · 3 months

I prefer my coffee...

RidiculousIncarnate · 3 months

Before I knew anything about coffee I would phrase my order this way,

"All I want is something with caffeine that tastes the least bit like coffee that you can manage. Chocolate, vanilla, caramel or whatever doesn't really matter, just surprise me."

This got me the least questions and usually the barista's were happy because they could 'experiment' with my drink. Never had a bad result either.

Learned years later while covering shifts in a cafe that was in our store that a favorite past time of many barista's included inventing drinks, that most customers would never see but were for the most part spectacularly delicious.

CharlesKB · 3 months

for anyone that want to ride the karma train and make a [FIXED][FIXED]. in Holland a coffee shop is the place where you legally buy weed.

End3rWi99in · 3 months

I can agree with Dennis Leary on one thing; I just want a fucking coffee. A medium coffee flavored fucking coffee.

Dickbeard_The_Pirate · 3 months

As someone who works in a coffee shop, I'm upset that nobody has ever ordered a "Vanilla Bullshit Thing".

juggasaurusrex · 3 months

Out of all coffee shops I've been to I found that Starbucks was the most confusing in terms of what to order. I never wanted to make a fool of myself so while I am in line, I'll practice what I'll say to the cashier to sound like i know what I"m saying.

[deleted] · 3 months

As a barista...I like people like this.

itakeafence · 3 months

I prefer my bullshit with caramel.

Wolf_SF · 3 months

i thought he was talking about the weed shops in holland O_O

Volumeknop · 3 months

This post cannot be understood by Dutch People. Or are we talking blunts?

DiarrheaPocket · 3 months

I love me some some coffee flavored sugar milk (which is what my coffee ends up becoming when I'm done with it).

PTFOholland · 3 months

Meanwhile Dutch Redditors are like:
They sell coffee there!?

KungFuHamster · 3 months

I was in a hospital with my wife early in the morning and I was getting some coffee at one of those tiny coffee shops they have in hospitals -- you know what I mean. I was looking in the display and they had some calorie-laden "breakfast" treats and I didn't know what they were called, so I was all like,

"Give me one of those blueberry-looking things."

"It's called a scone."

"Yeah, one of those."

Pythosblaze · 3 months

I used to work at a coffee shop, either at the register or taking orders. There was one woman who I saw almost every day who ordered a "grande chocolate raspberry cappuccino, skinny (2% milk), half decaf at 140˚, extra foam, no saucer."

fezzuk · 3 months

me: large black coffee please

her: pardon

me: large coffee, no milk please.

her: medio americano ?

me: i guess, just big black coffee right?

her: we dont have grande just medio and small (why they use "small" as apposed to piccolo or similar i have no idea)

me: ok fine the larger one of those two with black coffee in please.

her: Americano?

me: YES OK MEDIO AMERICANO, I WILL USE THAT STUPID WORD. (first thing in the morning, and i would not be so angry if i had had my nice cuppa black coffee)

and this is why i just go to nice old fashioned Italian cafe's for my coffee now instead of american chains because they still understand what a black coffee is. and despite the actual people in the cafe actually being italian (as apposed to Australian exchange students) they don't expect me to pretend to speak it first thing in the morning.

Schwarzwind · 3 months

I was at the pub this last sunday with some friends, we saw a guy that looked exactly like Larry David. I couldn't help myself, started humming the theme song to Curb your Enthusiasm, my friends joined in loud enough that he heard. He was not amused.

Lepepino · 3 months

This is what going to Starbucks with friends is like.

flinteastwood · 3 months

Man, I hate those vanilla bullshit latte things. I love it when my coffee tastes like dirt. For that reason, I choose a french press.

caitlyntetmeyer · 3 months

I work at a coffee shop. I would ask him, "The vanilla bullshit latte or the vanilla chai bullshit latte?"

RalphNLD · 3 months

In Holland a coffee shop has a rather different meaning...

Silver_Drummer · 3 months

more like gimmy a black coffee and make it blacker then black by putting a shot of espresso in it as well.

hmatmotu · 3 months

I remember the last time I had vanilla bullshit...the vanilla flavor did not hide at all the fact that I was consuming the fecal matter of a male bovine.

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