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2058
2059

Article in Ugandan tabloids about homosexuals (imgur.com)

submitted ago by freshy86

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[–]1337p3n15 1453 points1454 points ago

fancied downloading his sperms in my butt

finally an article with words I understand...

[–]avantgeek 923 points924 points ago

shaftmate

andaconda-sized whoppers

This is... is there a Pulitzer for colorful use of language in an article?

[–]SaentFu 223 points224 points ago

makes me wonder if it's a translation + thesaurus issue

[–]nixonrichard 415 points416 points ago

I am very interested in purchasing a thesaurus which includes "shaftmate" as a synonym.

[–]troglodyte 186 points187 points ago

synonyms: "bonerpal," "dickbuddy."

[–]autechr3 35 points36 points ago

instead of "man and wife" you'll be "butt-buuddies"

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    [–]treedick2011 14 points15 points ago

    Just become British. (I think Uganda was once their colony) they use fairly random words like that too.

    [–]Damocles693 14 points15 points ago

    Bonerfarts!

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        [–]Homeschooled316 123 points124 points ago

        I was curious, so I found this:

        http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ugandan_English

        [–]cynicofbabylon 125 points126 points ago

        "The Broadway play The Vagina Monologues had a brief, but notorious, appearance on the Ugandan stage before being banned by government censors. The brouhaha led to the entry of the word monologue into Ugandan English as a euphemism for vagina. The newspaper Red Pepper popularized the use of the word kandahar and after the 2010 World Cup, vuvuzela for vagina, and whopper for penis."

        This article is WTF-worthy in itself.

        [–]disasterrising 79 points80 points ago

        Officially referring to my vagina as a 'vuvuzela' from now on.

        [–]thatpaulbloke 97 points98 points ago

        Ten thousand bonus points if you can get it to make the noise, too.

        [–]DierdraVaal 38 points39 points ago

        Sex would be ruined foreve- BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

        [–]red-ditor 14 points15 points ago

        Bzzzzzzzzzzzzz goollll!!!

        [–]DonkeyDongRacing 24 points25 points ago

        Because it is familiar with the mouths of a million South-Africans and sometimes also referred to as "The Shame of Joburg"?

        [–]disasterrising 12 points13 points ago

        ...Precisely.

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          [–]frenchelection 34 points35 points ago

          "The police are looking for a man putting on a red shirt"

          [–]CraineTwo 104 points105 points ago

          "Hmm, that man already has a red shirt on. Must not be our guy."

          [–]Gr8WhiteGrammarNazi 18 points19 points ago

          That page got absolutely gutted. That quote isn't on there anymore.

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            [–]jackthedog 9 points10 points ago

            That's fascinating, thanks for sharing. I think I'll refer to my basement as a godown from now on.

            [–]tallaghtmick 6 points7 points ago

            Well I wont be afraid anymore when a Ugandan says he wants to eat all the Irish....

            [–]distractedbywires 4 points5 points ago

            Eiii, but that is so so bad! That one has no manners with his whopper! It is because he is stubborn and has bad manners. If he would scheme to have many cocks instead there would be some good money. But it is because of the import of the gays and witchcraft that has made it so.

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                [–]tits_hemingway 142 points143 points ago

                Seriously, if I was a gay man, my preferred term for my dude would be "shaft mate". Too many straight people using "partner", anyway."

                [–]lolbacon 245 points246 points ago

                I pronounce you shaft mates. You may now drill the bum.

                [–]Roached_N_Weeded 213 points214 points ago

                Psshhh, I have to say I think You are all only ASSUMING he is gay. I mean, look at the title of that piece.

                BEWARE Notorious Bum Driller on the Loose.

                I don't see anything here about a homosexual. In fact, I think focusing on the sexual orientation of this guy is totally missing the issue. THERE IS A GOD DAMN BUM DRILLER OUT THERE! Doesn't matter what gender, race, age, etc. you are.....we are all just bums to be drilled to this monster.

                And this isn't just any Bum Driller, his bum related escapades have gotten him a reputation. He is not just "A" bum driller. He is "THE" Bum driller, notorious for his actions. AND HE IS ON THE FUCKING LOOSE!

                Forget the gay thing, the real shit we need to be talking about here is anti-bum drilling defense tactics. I personally go with the ol' San Quentin standby, nothing stops a bum driller faster than an anus full of razor blades.

                (PSA for those who assume I am serious, I'm not. I realize its about a gay dude, I'm just making one of those joke things people talk about. Why so serious down voters?)

                [–]nebula27 7 points8 points ago

                This is what I wanted to hear.

                [–]Roached_N_Weeded 6 points7 points ago

                I'm glad people on reddit appreciate my humor, I drop jokes like this IRL and it usually earns me some stares and glares. At least this joke is dead-baby free, I dunno what it is about a good dead baby joke, but I find them delightful.

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                  [–]JCAPS766 12 points13 points ago

                  butt-buddies!

                  [–]cptspiffy 33 points34 points ago

                  I almost wanna go gay just for this.

                  "Hey, shaftmate, how as your day?"

                  "It was OK, let's go hit the mines."

                  [–]tits_hemingway 21 points22 points ago

                  Something about a hard hat and drilling...

                  [–]beer2daybong2morrow 40 points41 points ago

                  ... and then you hit a gas pocket.

                  [–]fknrat 7 points8 points ago

                  GAY MAN

                  AA-AAAAAHHH!

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                      [–]milkman1509 144 points145 points ago

                      shouldn't it be upload his sperm in my butt? you bum driller.

                      [–]BunsOfAluminum 73 points74 points ago

                      It depends on whether or not there was a request involved. If he had wanted the sperm, he would request it and it would be downloaded. Since the victim here did not request the sperm, I'd say it counts as an upload.

                      [–]raffytraffy 65 points66 points ago

                      a forced download maybe?

                      either way, loads were had.

                      [–]czarchastic 108 points109 points ago

                      The body has a way of canceling the transfer.

                      [–]I_eat_burritos 70 points71 points ago

                      But only in cases of legitimate downloads. Pirating sperms must be stopped.

                      [–]teklord 55 points56 points ago

                      You wouldn't download an andaconda-sized whopper.

                      [–]PyroNavi 8 points9 points ago

                      I'm... laughing... so hard. Everyone in the office is staring at me.

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                        [–]vectorblack 16 points17 points ago

                        You wouldn't steal a sperm.

                        [–]TheZingerSlinger 8 points9 points ago

                        Every sperm is sacred.

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                          [–]brningpyre 44 points45 points ago

                          Hopefully, there was enough bandwidth to handle the flow.

                          [–]Kohuded 30 points31 points ago

                          You could say that his hard-drive was up for it

                          [–]SuperShamou 37 points38 points ago

                          It definitely wasn't a 3 1/2" floppy.

                          Edit - corrected the size so diamondjim would get the joke.

                          [–]brningpyre 6 points7 points ago

                          The uploader kept a bit of a buffer ready.

                          [–]DingoManDingo 4 points5 points ago

                          A floppy wouldn't be able to do the job

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                              [–]KhabaLox 8 points9 points ago

                              It depends on whether or not there was a request involved.

                              Gives a hole new meaning to SYN - ACK!

                              [–]mcquild 9 points10 points ago

                              Surely it also depends on the angle of the receivers butthole.

                              Common sense dictates that if the waist to leg angle is acute, then a download,aided by gravity, will occur.

                              If the angle is obtuse, an upload will occur. Since gravity works down the upload is often messier.

                              This is also the reason why your upload speed is much slower than your download speed.

                              [–]all_the_sex 3 points4 points ago

                              We need you over at /r/shittyaskscience

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                                  [–]SuperShamou 4 points5 points ago

                                  There's no need to call 1337p3n15 a bum driller.

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                                    [–]Priapulid 106 points107 points ago

                                    Shaka, when the walls fell.

                                    [–]Lulwut_ 90 points91 points ago

                                    Temba, his cheeks wide.

                                    [–]always_abort_it 89 points90 points ago

                                    Darmok and Jalad, balls deep

                                    [–]Lulwut_ 64 points65 points ago

                                    Mirab, his clothes unfurled.

                                    [–]RapeChoke 48 points49 points ago

                                    Uzani, his ass bleeding and open.

                                    [–]Lulwut_ 34 points35 points ago

                                    Uzani, his army with fists deep.

                                    [–]Ephemeros 40 points41 points ago

                                    ಠ_ಠ

                                    You should all be ashamed of yourselves.

                                    [–]Lulwut_ 44 points45 points ago

                                    Kiteo, his eyes closed.

                                    [–]RapeChoke 41 points42 points ago

                                    Zinda, his face black, his ass red.

                                    [–]angrytortilla 11 points12 points ago

                                    Ezekiel, his sperms uploaded to the butts.

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                                        [–]RapeChoke 23 points24 points ago

                                        Darmok, at his butthole

                                        [–]JCAPS766 3 points4 points ago

                                        the whole thread from this comment

                                        [–]roxnrock 158 points159 points ago

                                        An answer to the age-old question that IT-folks can understand...

                                        "What's anal sex like?"

                                        "It's like you're downloading sperms into my butt".

                                        [–]fyrie 56 points57 points ago

                                        One sperm has 37.5MB of DNA information in it. That means a normal ejaculation represents a data transfer of 1587GB in about 3 secs.

                                        If this theory is true than this guy got a buttload of upload. It is like Jimmy Wales butt raped him with Wikipedia.

                                        Edit: Wikipedia is probably more like 6000GB. Still would hurt though. [Citation needed]

                                        [–]roxnrock 22 points23 points ago

                                        So that's 4,232 Gbps?

                                        Then why do people complain about comcast anally raping them when they're only getting 15 Mbps? They'd hardly feel such a small pipe!

                                        [–]alexanderpas 14 points15 points ago

                                        It's all about duplicate data.

                                        Even with 4232 Gbps, you only get about 75MB of actual data, spread over all those packets, with an actual data loss of 50%.

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                                            [–]roxnrock 75 points76 points ago

                                            You wouldn't download a car though...

                                            [–]warped_and_bubbling 52 points53 points ago

                                            If it was into my butt.... maybe.

                                            [–]Man_with_the_Fedora 90 points91 points ago

                                            http://i.imgur.com/ofhy7.jpg

                                            [–]joemangle 32 points33 points ago

                                            Oh...

                                            [–]Man_with_the_Fedora 35 points36 points ago

                                            myyyyy.

                                            [–]anderungen 60 points61 points ago

                                            http://i.imgur.com/WjOTd.jpg

                                            [–]White_Luigi 12 points13 points ago

                                            Hey I know that butt! RIP Ryan Dunn :(

                                            [–]TheMightyBarabajagal 12 points13 points ago

                                            The car got it's revenge in the end...

                                            [–]Carter52 3 points4 points ago

                                            at first i laughed, but then i got sad

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                                              [–]penguin_sweater 10 points11 points ago

                                              Only trains.

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                                                [–]freecandy_van 439 points440 points ago

                                                This reads like the Ugandan version of The Onion

                                                [–]mistaphi[!] 114 points115 points ago

                                                This is from the highly offensive tabloid, The Red Pepper. I used to live over there, and unfortunately Uganda's actual newspapers are not much better in terms of content or grammar. But they are entertaining!

                                                [–]dailydishabille 26 points27 points ago

                                                Having also lived in Uganda (primarily in Hoima), whenever I would go to Kampala I would see them in sooo many shops and it would make me sad. I do not care much for The Red Pepper.

                                                I can also verify that the other papers are not much better in their composition.

                                                [–]Fuckyousantorum 7 points8 points ago

                                                Red Pepper has the exact same website design as the UK Daily Mail which seems like Elton John's family newsletter in comparison to Red Pepper.

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                                                  [–]canavans 16 points17 points ago

                                                  Ha, the newspaper is called 'The Red Pepper' except its a serious paper.

                                                  [–]DrMuffinPHD 20 points21 points ago

                                                  It would be funny if they didn't murder people over there for being homosexual.

                                                  Kinda makes the whole thing much less humorous.

                                                  [–]Residue 58 points59 points ago

                                                  I was almost sure this was from onion. This cannot be real.

                                                  [–]Cvantez 34 points35 points ago

                                                  This kind of thing is par for the course in Uganda.

                                                  [–]arrowheadt 57 points58 points ago

                                                  "The proposed legislation in Uganda has been noted by several news agencies to be inspired by American evangelical Christians."

                                                  ಠ_ಠ

                                                  [–]Aleriya 44 points45 points ago

                                                  Many American evangelists have travelled to Uganda and other parts of Africa to preach about how homosexuality is evil, how it destroys society, how you must stop gay rights before it gains a foothold, and how God will cause hurricanes and punish people who tolerate homosexuality. Then the evangelists claim to be surprised when that country enacts a death penalty for being gay . . .

                                                  There are several American anti-gay groups, like Focus on the Family, that raise money to promote "family values" and use that money for things like this.

                                                  [–]lordcorbran 7 points8 points ago

                                                  It would be awesome if that money could go toward fixing the real problems in Africa instead of manufacturing new ones. "Clean drinking water? Infrastructure? Nah, let's dump tons of money into persecuting people we irrationally hate."

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                                                    [–]Nosfermarki 42 points43 points ago

                                                    Yes and this is why all of that money that Chik-Fil-A donated was bad.

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                                                      [–]sothisislife101 53 points54 points ago

                                                      Sadly, it probably is.

                                                      [–]Bohzee 30 points31 points ago

                                                      and homosexuals are called out to be killed and hated.

                                                      [–]Boatsnbuds 11 points12 points ago

                                                      It's from a stir-up-the-shit-type tabloid called The Red Pepper: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Pepper_(newspaper)

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                                                            [–]mr_darwins_tortoise 123 points124 points ago

                                                            Notorious Bum Driller seems like it would be a good reddit username.

                                                            [–]ANAL_PLUNDERING 177 points178 points ago

                                                            http://i.imgur.com/wbSbX.gif

                                                            [–]Haasts_Eagle 131 points132 points ago

                                                            I was expecting this GIF.

                                                            [–]nikitakaganovich 84 points85 points ago

                                                            well that's never gonna be relevant again.

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                                                                [–]Notorious_Bum_Drilla 165 points166 points ago

                                                                Unfortunately it's one letter too long.

                                                                [–]elapid 24 points25 points ago

                                                                Should have made Bumdriller one word.

                                                                [–]Notorious_Bum_Drilla 25 points26 points ago

                                                                I was going to but I prefer having more emphasis on 'Drilla'.

                                                                [–]BumDrillingShaftmate 43 points44 points ago

                                                                I hope we cross paths cross again in the future :)

                                                                [–]Notorious_Bum_Drilla 11 points12 points ago

                                                                Perhaps... one day.

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                                                                    [–]ANAL_PLUNDERING 39 points40 points ago

                                                                    I like it, dawg.

                                                                    [–]JCAPS766 13 points14 points ago

                                                                    great call, my friend.

                                                                    please, stick around with that handle

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                                                                      [–]DownloadSpermsToButt 87 points88 points ago

                                                                      Was looking for a new username, unfortunately I stumbled across your comment too late. But you know what? This'll do nicely.

                                                                      [–]I_DRINK_PERlOD_BLOOD 4 points5 points ago

                                                                      Sperm are incompatible with butt.

                                                                      [–]MEGAFUCKER 13 points14 points ago

                                                                      What's with all these outrageous names these days?

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                                                                        [–]Mozzy 8 points9 points ago

                                                                        Or a rap(p)er.

                                                                        [–]notorious-bumdriller 26 points27 points ago

                                                                        you called?

                                                                        [–]mitt-romney 21 points22 points ago

                                                                        I did.

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                                                                          [–]Sperm_Downloader 3 points4 points ago

                                                                          Close enough.

                                                                          [–]Notorious_Bum_Drillr 12 points13 points ago

                                                                          Hi

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                                                                            [–]voterboat 477 points478 points ago

                                                                            This article is about a rapist that happens to be homosexual. Either way, that poor guy's leaking bums.

                                                                            [–]ruderabbit 346 points347 points ago

                                                                            We only have that guy's word he's a rapist. With Ugandan attitudes toward Homosexuality it's quite possible that the "victim" was caught in the act and would rather be considered a rape-victim than a criminal.

                                                                            [–]what_comes_after_q 153 points154 points ago

                                                                            Yes, it's an alleged rapist, but he did escape from jail and is a wanted fugitive. It's worth noting that homosexuality is a crime punishable by life in prison in Uganda. Uganda be kidding me.

                                                                            [–]noprotein 53 points54 points ago

                                                                            HIGHLY POSSIBLE.

                                                                            [–]llort_revocrednu 8 points9 points ago

                                                                            his word.. and his leaky bum

                                                                            [–]massada 7 points8 points ago

                                                                            Wait, so he he lives in a country where "I have been raped in the ass" is a preferable statement over "I had willing but sex"?

                                                                            [–]ringringbananalone 19 points20 points ago

                                                                            Yes, because the latter is punishable by life in prison

                                                                            [–]Scarabus 7 points8 points ago

                                                                            Yeah. Partly because it won't get you thrown into jail, I imagine.

                                                                            Must lead to the worst goddamn kind of prisoner's dilemma when a couple gets arrested.

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                                                                              [–]red321red321 34 points35 points ago

                                                                              Real loose butthole

                                                                              [–]alphonsemucha 6 points7 points ago

                                                                              Real loose.

                                                                              [–]bitterorca 102 points103 points ago

                                                                              Honestly, I doubt he's even a rapist. It more than likely was consensual, but after the 'victim' was caught in the act, he probably avoided criminal (or worse) penalties by crying rape.

                                                                              Another strong possibility is that the article is highly exaggerated.

                                                                              [–]Duderino316 56 points57 points ago

                                                                              Nice try butt-rapist!

                                                                              [–]soullessgingerfck 19 points20 points ago

                                                                              the term is analrapist

                                                                              [–]kjoeleskapet 11 points12 points ago

                                                                              And yet another strong possibility is that it's simply all made up to justify a manhunt against him. I've heard of gay men in Uganda who are falsely accused of kidnapping and raping children, and even murder just to justify a wider-spread hatred of them and encourage vigilante "justice".

                                                                              [–]TheZingerSlinger 21 points22 points ago

                                                                              I don't know. As a former professional journalist, I think the understated prose and calm adherence to facts and scientific terminology makes this story seem entirely legitimate.

                                                                              [–]Sakarabu 9 points10 points ago

                                                                              Did you miss the part where he was rushed to hospital with a bleeding asshole? Not something that usually happens with consensual sex.

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                                                                                [–]Tom- 12 points13 points ago

                                                                                The article is probably mostly made up or extremely exaggerated. LGBT rights in Uganda are shocking, watch this.

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                                                                                  [–]techmaster242 565 points566 points ago

                                                                                  He puts his hand into the other man's anus, and then they eat da poo poo.

                                                                                  [–]ReLiC71 97 points98 points ago

                                                                                  Like ice-cream

                                                                                  [–]greenRiverThriller 23 points24 points ago

                                                                                  I love how he pulls up a picture of goatse. The guy in goatse is straight and married.

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                                                                                    [–]luvs_T0_spooge 27 points28 points ago

                                                                                    AN DEY SMEAR DE POOPOO!!!!

                                                                                    [–]ANatale 131 points132 points ago

                                                                                    He's referring to this.

                                                                                    [–]usually_sarcasm 43 points44 points ago

                                                                                    That video is blocked in my country. I'm kinda relieved.

                                                                                    [–]ANatale 142 points143 points ago

                                                                                    There's nothing graphic about it. Its just some happy sounding african guy on a panel explaining how all gay people do is lick each other's anuses and eat each other's shit. It's quite horrible of them.

                                                                                    [–]Evilllamas 32 points33 points ago

                                                                                    the video it'self is pretty hillarious though. "They lick it like a ice cream.... "

                                                                                    [–]yaredw 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                    As a bum-driller, I still find this video quite hilarious.

                                                                                    [–]Buckfutters 43 points44 points ago

                                                                                    It's quite hilarious of them.

                                                                                    FTFY

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                                                                                      [–]samort7 20 points21 points ago

                                                                                      Is this real? I can't believe this is real.

                                                                                      [–]wumumo 26 points27 points ago

                                                                                      Yes, it's shocking and sad but it's true: homosexuals eat da poo poo out of da anus!

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                                                                                        [–]hitlerwasright 30 points31 points ago

                                                                                        What a hypocrite... attacking homosexuality while using a Mac

                                                                                        [–]CatAstrophy11 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                        Or how about when he talks about some of the acts in vulgar terms and THEN tells the children to leave.

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                                                                                          [–]SiliconGuy 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                          After watching this, I'm definitely voting for Mitt.

                                                                                          [–]MisterYouAreSoDumb 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                          We want to ask Barack Obama, is this what he want's to bring to Africa as a human right...to eat the poo poo?!?

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                                                                                            [–]tphantom1 12 points13 points ago

                                                                                            One-a de tings dey do is called ANAL LEEEEEEKING!

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                                                                                              [–]freshy86[S] 74 points75 points ago

                                                                                              For those interested, this is the tabloid that printed the story it's an absolute gold mine if you're willing to sift through it all.

                                                                                              [–]nicholasCageSucks 24 points25 points ago

                                                                                              Ah Red Pepper, staying classy. Sleaziest tabloid in probably all of Africa.

                                                                                              [–]BurnyBurn 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                              Die Son begs to differ

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                                                                                                [–]vyllex 128 points129 points ago

                                                                                                I'm a gay man and coincidentally "Bum Driller" was my nickname in high school.

                                                                                                [–]yamahaaaaa 46 points47 points ago

                                                                                                But were you notorious?

                                                                                                [–]vyllex 49 points50 points ago

                                                                                                To some degree.

                                                                                                [–]duckglass 25 points26 points ago

                                                                                                i wonder why...

                                                                                                [–]vyllex 58 points59 points ago

                                                                                                It initially started off as a derogatory term towards me, actually. However, I was one of the more popular guys in high school, simply for being gay, and I started actively calling myself that. People no longer used it as derogatory and it just became a nickname. A nickname some people still use for me actually. I'm entirely fine with it as well.

                                                                                                [–]ls1z28chris 50 points51 points ago

                                                                                                So is this color fine, or do you prefer something else?

                                                                                                [–]vyllex 30 points31 points ago

                                                                                                It's your tag, I won't be able to see it otherwise. Any color you want is fine.

                                                                                                [–]onowahoo 38 points39 points ago

                                                                                                Brown

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                                                                                                  [–]drakfyre 21 points22 points ago

                                                                                                  Let me give you some advice Bum Driller. Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.

                                                                                                  [–]vyllex 25 points26 points ago

                                                                                                  That's... kinda what I've already done.

                                                                                                  [–]drakfyre 19 points20 points ago

                                                                                                  Shhhh, let me quote Game of Thrones for the precious, precious karma. ;)

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                                                                                                    [–]xtiaaneubaten 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                    I dare say its something to do with the fact hes gay and children are cruel

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                                                                                                      [–]DrDizaster 53 points54 points ago

                                                                                                      "after he shattered one Mutaba's ass."

                                                                                                      [–]Diplomjodler 136 points137 points ago

                                                                                                      What kind of warped mind does it take to make an anti-gay tirade sound like gay porn?

                                                                                                      [–]ne99ne 94 points95 points ago

                                                                                                      My thought exactly, somewhere, there is an Ugandan journalist with... desires.

                                                                                                      [–]uberbob79 19 points20 points ago

                                                                                                      Anaconda sized at that.

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                                                                                                        [–]Tor_Coolguy 15 points16 points ago

                                                                                                        I strongly suspect the writer was just having fun with it, and probably doesn't give a fuck.

                                                                                                        [–]interkin3tic 16 points17 points ago

                                                                                                        I just assume that the people who are most anti-gay are closeted homosexuals, so it doesn't surprise me that there's going to be Freudian slips.

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                                                                                                          [–]Nallenbot 59 points60 points ago

                                                                                                          Shaftmate? Bumdriller? Comedy gold.

                                                                                                          [–]ad892 40 points41 points ago

                                                                                                          Now that's motherfucking journalism

                                                                                                          [–]jmb1406 27 points28 points ago

                                                                                                          ass shattering is no laughing matter

                                                                                                          [–]OutstandingWarrant 24 points25 points ago

                                                                                                          He'll probably need the Iron Butt

                                                                                                          [–]sevl 10 points11 points ago

                                                                                                          So, how did the writer of this article get cosy enough with the "bum-driller" to take this photograph?

                                                                                                          [–]BrittonB 10 points11 points ago

                                                                                                          Here's the Red Pepper Tabloid website that the article is from, if anyone is interested in seeing what other sort of content they publish.

                                                                                                          [–]yamahaaaaa 15 points16 points ago

                                                                                                          Men leading with HIV

                                                                                                          Men have been rated number 1 in transmitting and leading with the ‘incurable’ syndrome AIDS a new survey carried out by AIDS commission reveals.

                                                                                                          Hell yeah, number 1! Take that, women!

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                                                                                                            [–]PubeSchool 21 points22 points ago

                                                                                                            Classic Ugandan Eat Da Poo Poo

                                                                                                            [–]HymenAnnihilator 18 points19 points ago

                                                                                                            Uganda: keeping shit real since forever

                                                                                                            [–]REDDIT_JUDGE_REFEREE 12 points13 points ago

                                                                                                            So, this is what Kony's been up to.

                                                                                                            [–]JCAPS766 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                            oh jesus, that's terrible!

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                                                                                                              [–]Number60000 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                                              That's probably from the Red Pepper, a newspaper in Uganda, they LOVE stories like that. I've seen headlines about 'Man looses Whopper!' meaning his penis, and articles about a woman's 'Kandahar' her vagina. Makes for some entertaining reading when stuck in traffic while in Kampala.

                                                                                                              [–]freshy86[S] 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                              It is indeed the Red Pepper. There are actually much funnier/stranger articles on the site. It's just very difficult to find them all.

                                                                                                              [–]maltwyrm 22 points23 points ago

                                                                                                              "They eat the poo-poo!"

                                                                                                              [–]ViolentPancakes 26 points27 points ago

                                                                                                              I cannot believe this article because there was not mention of eating da poopoos. Therefore this man was probably not a real homosexual. Real homosexuals eat da poo poo.

                                                                                                              [–]CleanBill 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                              They also lick de a-nas , and put fist in da rectum.

                                                                                                              [–]twixtwix 14 points15 points ago

                                                                                                              'downloading his sperms'? Surely that should be uploading his sperms.

                                                                                                              [–]Lebagel 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                              You simply could not make this up if you tried.

                                                                                                              [–]Yooklid 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                              Am I the only person who wants him to cover the US election?

                                                                                                              [–]trampus1 12 points13 points ago

                                                                                                              Can we start calling them bumdrillers and shaftmates here, too? Can we?! Fuck it, I'll start it up on my own.

                                                                                                              Edit: /r/bumdrillers

                                                                                                              [–]Dr_Thomas_Roll 20 points21 points ago

                                                                                                              The sordid story of anti-gay sentiment in Uganda starts with an American fundamentalist preacher. True story.

                                                                                                              [–]FarFromXanadu 24 points25 points ago

                                                                                                              Funny story: Ugandan politicians consider that offensive and claim they were anti-gay before. They've claimed that allegation is the West trying to take credit for their 'good work'.

                                                                                                              [–]Platypussy 22 points23 points ago

                                                                                                              So they're like the hipsters of homophobia?

                                                                                                              [–]Eyclonus 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                              They had gay bashings long before we started feeling uncomfortable around gays. I can imagine a South Park parody episode which features cave drawings of the first homophobic mob.

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                                                                                                                  [–]Self_Manifesto 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                                  Article in Ugandan tabloids about homosexuals rapists

                                                                                                                  FTFY

                                                                                                                  [–]incarcicon 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                                  hide yo' kids, hide yo' wife, and hide yo' husbands cuz they rapin everybody out here in Uganda.

                                                                                                                  [–]Furiouss06 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                  They left out the part where he eats da poo-poo.

                                                                                                                  [–]seaners111 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                  I don't know if I should be disgusted or impressed that he "shattered" another man's ass....

                                                                                                                  [–]hbrooster 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                  If I were this guy I would be so proud of this article.

                                                                                                                  [–]Terminatorinhell 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                  Bumdriller? Thats fucking hilarous

                                                                                                                  [–]adrynochrome 1 point2 points ago

                                                                                                                  Based on what I've heard about the anti-gay propaganda in Uganda. I highly doubt this guy was raped. He was probably all for it until he got caught and then to avoid going to jail for being gay he said he was raped. It's really terrible over there. The way that they talk about gays is almost amusing because they're so ignorant.

                                                                                                                  [–]AccipiterQ 13 points14 points ago

                                                                                                                  I, for one, welcome our bum drilling overlords

                                                                                                                  [–]hellointernet81 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                  WHY HAS NOBODY ASKED THE ONLY QUESTION THAT MATTERS: WHY IS CHRIS TUCKER GETTING FUCKED IN THE ASS BY SOME UGANDAN TWENTYSOMETHING

                                                                                                                  [–]Reggieperrin 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                                                  Come on we all disagree with the sentiment of the article and people should not be judged by whom they happen to fall in love with BUT, That's a funny as fuck article, I want that guy to come and report stuff for our tabloids he deserves some kind of award.

                                                                                                                  [–]CHAAAZZZZ 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                                                  looks like the OP made the front page again.

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