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all 91 comments

[–]MAN_UP_LOSERSURREY 45 points46 points ago

Relevant and OC, from my personal collection

Jessica Ennis

Gok Wan

[–]sp8derNorthumberland (Has a dumb flag.) 19 points20 points ago

Jesus christ Gok looks terrifying.

SOULS

[–]appers66Leicester 5 points6 points ago

The secret to Ennis' success: she was part snake all along

[–]BullNiroAustralia 2 points3 points ago

[–]singingtheblues 110 points111 points ago

It's not Heston Blumenthal, its Masterchef's Greg Wallace

[–]Pessle 148 points149 points ago

He's got the buttery biscuit base.

[–]Dr_SandvichI'm lucky enough to only live near Crawley 50 points51 points ago

[–]jake314159England 41 points42 points ago

I got the context but still watched the whole thing again.

[–]zmansman17 5 points6 points ago

To be honest, I think the whole thing stacked Just fine.

[–]ProblematicCatch 1 point2 points ago

On the reddit is where I spend most of my days.

[–]bingblondie 2 points3 points ago

Holy cockballs that was good.

[–]Cormorrant 1 point2 points ago

I listened to this ten times non stop. Thanks for making my entire day Britain.

[–]IrraxLancaster 11 points12 points ago

it says more Heston magic to the side

[–]areyoufuckingthickLancashire 3 points4 points ago

True story: this guy had an affair with my old science teacher, he then got divorced and then got engaged and married to my science teacher and then about a year later 'they' (by which I mean he) unofficially separated. This happened within a a year or two. They met on twitter, after they tweeted to each other about celery (if I can remember the school rumour-mill correctly).

Apparently he's a perverted bastard and is into BDSM (I think it was revealed in the papers).

[–]JeremyKylesLovechildDNA tested 0 points1 point ago

I heard he's got quite the porn collection too

[–]areyoufuckingthickLancashire 0 points1 point ago

From what I heard/seen, this is true!

[–]ProvingWrong 1 point2 points ago

1st December 2011?

[–]yoitsreid 1 point2 points ago

This looks like a penis

[–]legumeelondon w2 0 points1 point ago

ahh, this guy

[–]hhmmmm 0 points1 point ago

FLAVOUR!!!!

[–]SkuldYorkshire[M] 45 points46 points ago

This post is currently hovering around #3 on /r/all's hot list.

We're going to be having some visitors when the Americans wake up ;)

[–]SwiftfootedLondon (but from Northumberland) 47 points48 points ago

I wonder if we can convince them that the Waitrose Weekend is the most reputable newspaper in the UK...

[–]sp8derNorthumberland (Has a dumb flag.) 31 points32 points ago

To be honest, it probably is.

[–]sternslovchildEuropean Union 4 points5 points ago

Aye, it didn't get attacked in the Thick of It this week.

[–]pryomancerHampshire 35 points36 points ago

Let's make a bunch of posts talking about crumpets, the Queen and tea.

[–]RedditMcRedditor -5 points-4 points ago

I wondered why the level of intelligence had took a massive nose dive in this thread. I guess that explains it.

[–]legumeelondon w2 9 points10 points ago

waitrose have done something similarish before

[–]xereetoFuck yeah Scotland -5 points-4 points ago

They're talking about 9gaggers and F7U12'ers.

"Love 'le' you cunt..."

[–]ImNotJesus 55 points56 points ago

Heston Blumenthal, now as big a cock as Gordon.

[–]GrumpyHippy 5 points6 points ago

I always thought he was a bit of a knob!

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]therico 0 points1 point ago

Shameful.

[–]GrumpyHippy -1 points0 points ago

Ooh, this explains why I had a redorange for nothing earlier, what'd they say?

[–]therico 0 points1 point ago

It was an Amazon referral link to his cookbook.

[–]chippehYorkshire 21 points22 points ago

This was from last year, I think. Funny nonetheless.

[–]legumeelondon w2 2 points3 points ago

from 1st december 2011 issue

[–]corney91 1 point2 points ago

Yeah, I remember a similar story involving the Waitrose paper and thought maybe they make a habit of subtly dirty images. But, alas, it seems to be a one-off.

[–]mrandocalrissian 0 points1 point ago

It is from last year, taken by and posted first by @fatherwoland on Twitter, IIRC.

[–]SkuldYorkshire 18 points19 points ago

[–]xyroclast 5 points6 points ago

This video is the only place I know Heston Blumenthal from, before this post...

[–]RoadBikeDalek 0 points1 point ago

Well if I AM retarded - you're a dick hole fuknut. With a sobbing eternal sense of cuntosity.

So that’s what you get when you take YouTube and multiply it with British.

[–]CLint_FLicker 1 point2 points ago

Johnny Malkovich!

[–]slickspsSwansea 6 points7 points ago

That's the article where he divulges the secret ingredient of his latest soup.

[–]pylori 13 points14 points ago

Pure liquid nitrogen.

[–]philomathieIsle of Skye 10 points11 points ago

Hundreds dead.

[–]Captain_BirdseyeDerbyshire 4 points5 points ago

Man soup....

[–]SasakuraEuropean Union 10 points11 points ago

Thus confirming my bias that Waitrose is full of old cocks.

[–]Sinkchain 26 points27 points ago

Ex Waitrose employee here.

They had a massive uproar about this, we were told not to talk about it and there were threats of disciplinary being thrown about.

[–]eliasqfuntybuntPortsmouth, Hampshire 29 points30 points ago

Another Ex-Waitrose employee here: this sounds like complete bollocks. At the branch I worked in any attempt to stop people commenting on the fact that they had a perspex stand with a big cock in it would be futile beyond all belief.

And beyond that, it's not a disciplinary offence, unless the Partner Handbook now includes "making fun of funny things" as a disciplinary event.

[–]walgmanLondon 8 points9 points ago

To be fair it probably depends in the sense of humour of the individual managers. Also people get sacked and disciplined illegally all the time. Years ago I got sacked on the stop for being late once! I took them to tribunal and proved I had lost 10 months salary. Great it was.

[–]Sinkchain 2 points3 points ago

Of course it was futile, there was bound to be gossip about the massive cock stand. That being said our manager was stupidly anal, I cannot begin to describe how "to the book" he was. Side story: I once brought a red pen into work and was lectured on how I could "get to sack" for using a green pen, as only the top of the top were permitted to use green ink to sign documents. Of course I would not be sacked for this, but he was a complete anal maniac.

[–]soigneesEx-Hampshirian living in Sweden 1 point2 points ago

you worked at the one on Marmion road? I think everyone in Portsmouth knows someone who has worked/works there. (I worked in the one in Petersfield as a checkout girl.)

[–]eliasqfuntybuntPortsmouth, Hampshire 0 points1 point ago

Nope, I worked at the one back where I used to live before I moved to Portsmouth. Don't know anyone at the Marmion Road one!

[–]soigneesEx-Hampshirian living in Sweden 0 points1 point ago

nuuuu my theory has been proved wrong! Oh well.

[–]eliasqfuntybuntPortsmouth, Hampshire 0 points1 point ago

I did see someone who worked in there on OKCupid once. That could have resulted in awkwardness.

[–]Black_ApalachiMerseyside 0 points1 point ago

Holy shit I didn't even see a cock until I read your post.

[–]eliasqfuntybuntPortsmouth, Hampshire 3 points4 points ago

Not sure if that's a reference to the OP, or a veiled insult towards me.

[–]Black_ApalachiMerseyside 0 points1 point ago

Ha, I didn't see that one coming either! Was indeed referring to OP's pic. :)

[–]rdm_boxKernow 10 points11 points ago

Proof: [PROOF]

[–]sporkasaurus 0 points1 point ago

whoever it is, he's clearly running his brain on windows XP.

[–]Grokta 2 points3 points ago

Trivia: In Denmark "pick" sounds like "pik" which translates into dick

[–]tmbyfc -4 points-3 points ago

What a massive dick.

[–]FkYouFlipFlops -3 points-2 points ago

yeah, what a dick head.

[–]yellish -2 points-1 points ago

It looks like a chess piece!

[–]bingblondie 0 points1 point ago

...I was going to bash the first person who made a lewd comment, but I suppose it does look like a Bishop.

[–]atypicalreddituser 1 point2 points ago

That guy is a dick.