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My girlfriend went to a baby shower and brought back some chocolate. I can't eat it. (imgur.com)

submitted ago by not_a_drip

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[–]odel555q 585 points586 points ago

Life begins at confection!

[–]pdmavid 85 points86 points ago

I can't eat it

Abort! Abort!

[–]DownvoteAttractor 11 points12 points ago

Being an atheist, I would have no problem in eating this.

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    [–]RapeTentacles 21 points22 points ago

    So remember to practice safe eating and use condiments!

    [–]itspitpat 42 points43 points ago

    I wish I could use that in any other situation, that is hilarious.

    [–]RelevantOldTestament 28 points29 points ago

    Use it for the slogan of a combination abortion clinic and bakery.

    [–]zenmunster 41 points42 points ago

    The slogan of this bakery/abortion clinic can be:

    We've got a bun in the oven for you....

    And if you've got one, we can take care of that too.

    [–]RelevantOldTestament 5 points6 points ago

    That could make a catchy jingle.

    [–]frotc914 4 points5 points ago

    combination abortion clinic and bakery

    I think I just found my next business endeavor. Nothing softens the blow of a baby-scramble like a nice cupcake.

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      [–]Srekcalp 3 points4 points ago

      Just store that pun in your head until you go to a baby shower with those chocolates, you will be the instant shit

      [–]EquinsuOcha 5 points6 points ago

      Fucking.

      Awesome.

      [–]JaxinCo 2 points3 points ago

      Ace Ventura is fucking awesome

      [–]Tuxedo717 -1 points0 points ago

      damn, i should have known that someone would beat me to the punch on this comment! :(

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        [–]Rectal_Fire 815 points816 points ago

        Do it like Kronos

        [–]Prescription_pants 251 points252 points ago

        Mythology upvote

        [–]johnny40 103 points104 points ago

        It's name is baby Zeus. He'd better eat it before it's too late.

        [–]KoreanDogEater 123 points124 points ago

        Before his girlfriend replaces it with a fucking rock.

        [–]subzero9101 93 points94 points ago

        Not just a regular rock but a fucking rock

        [–]cunninglinguist81 41 points42 points ago

        I was in Turkey last year and their Arkeoloji Müzesi (Museum of Archaeology) had a tablet with a story about a prehistoric god having sex with a rock. (In order to birth a god with the strength of stone to assassinate the other gods, no joke.)

        [–]JustBrowsing4Chan 26 points27 points ago

        Speaking of weird myths, apparently the Acropolis was born because Hephaestus wanted to get with Athena really bad. Athena didn't want him, and he just couldn't hold his feelings back. He eventually ejaculated from the sight of her and his semen landed on her leg. Athena was grossed out and wiped the semen off her leg with a cloth. She then tossed the cloth onto the ground and the Acropolis was born.

        [–]RelevantOldTestament 28 points29 points ago

        I guess you could call the Acropolis a "friendzone".

        [–]cunninglinguist81 8 points9 points ago

        Wow. This gives those videos I've seen of perverted Japanese dudes a whole new meaning.

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              [–]_Scarecrow_[!] 31 points32 points ago

              Your usernames match up so well.

              [–]ohmaniforgotmyacc 3 points4 points ago

              Its shit like this that makes me love Reddit.

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                [–]Tommix11 7 points8 points ago

                http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saturn_Devouring_His_Son

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                  [–]bcb77 206 points207 points ago

                  That is pretty creepy looking. That must have been an expensive shower, that baby chocolate must have been hand made.

                  [–]Unqualified_Opinion 59 points60 points ago

                  I don't think hands were involved.

                  [–]I_FIST_KITTENS 335 points336 points ago

                  Probably just a vacuum and a coat hanger.

                  [–]JayTee90 99 points100 points ago

                  ب_ب

                  [–]marioy1 26 points27 points ago

                  arabic ftw

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                    [–]Mystery_Hours 60 points61 points ago

                    I can't decide what's worse, the comment or the username.

                    [–]jolliettee 28 points29 points ago

                    I never normally look at the usernames... until someone mentions a username. Thank you for bringing I_FIST_KITTENS to my attention.

                    [–]Fawful 31 points32 points ago

                    Upvoted, bout to go sit in the corner of the shower scrubbing the dirty away

                    [–]johnsmcjohn 16 points17 points ago

                    Quitter.

                    [–]Goldcut 15 points16 points ago

                    Technically, whoever had the abortion is the quitter.

                    [–]StraY_WolF 5 points6 points ago

                    RAGE QUIT.

                    [–]TheSmartestMan 50 points51 points ago

                    ಠ_ಠ

                    [–]ohmaniforgotmyacc 21 points22 points ago

                    My friend was born with a scar above his eyebrow, upon graduating high school, his mom had to tell him that she tried to abort him with a clothes hangar. That is all. This is a true story by the way -___-

                    [–]RhapsodyinBloom 16 points17 points ago

                    Bright side: Can claim to be Harry Potter.

                    [–]playerIII 29 points30 points ago

                    You're an accident, Harry.

                    [–]Neebat 22 points23 points ago

                    Except for the whole "protected by a mother's love" thing.

                    [–]somecrazybroad 3 points4 points ago

                    You're aware because of biology and stuff that is impossible right? As the amniotic sac would have been broken?

                    [–]motherslove82 0 points1 point ago

                    Why on earth would she ever tell him that?

                    I don't think I could eat baby-shaped chocolate either.

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                          [–]greatchickenman 19 points20 points ago

                          99% sure it's just molded. You can order suckers with insects inside them; I'm sure you can order baby-molded chocolates.

                          [–]thraxicle 15 points16 points ago

                          That leaves the 1% for those of us that want to believe that child labor was involved crafting it.

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                            [–]TraceeLeCanadian 10 points11 points ago

                            It's disgusting. The kind of thing you buy just to one-up your friends about what you can afford and they can't.

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                              [–]memorycollector 72 points73 points ago

                              That's marzipan

                              [–]crazy_dance 55 points56 points ago

                              Seriously, OP this is marzipan, NOT chocolate. Do not eat! DO NOT EAT!

                              [–]ixion238 65 points66 points ago

                              I don't care what shape it's in, if it's made out of marzipan, I'm eating it.

                              [–]laladestrukt 10 points11 points ago

                              For a long time I didn't know what marzipan was. When I found out I also realized it's delicious use in bear claws. I'm not sure I'd want to eat it straight, but I don't get the hate it so often receives. Marzipan is definitely ok stuff in my book.

                              [–]kaninchen17 16 points17 points ago

                              Came to this thread to say it's defintely Marzipan! This may be growing up in Germany, but I love it. That and bubbly mineral water (Sprudel)...a lot of people don't like that either.

                              [–]IBiteYou 18 points19 points ago

                              Oh a baby marzipan with a chaser of Sprudel is heaven.

                              [–]razorbeamz 3 points4 points ago

                              It's an acquired taste, both of them.

                              [–]Emaleeen1 2 points3 points ago

                              All the marzipan I've ever eaten looked like this. Put I imagine peanut marzipan (mazapan in Spanish) is a bit more difficult to shape than the German stuff.

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                                  [–]firstaccounttemp 3 points4 points ago

                                  I bloody love marzipan. Especially with a bit of dark chocolate.

                                  [–]benji1304 2 points3 points ago

                                  Marzipan is delicious stuff...why would you not eat it?! Especially with a cup of coffee, the almond flavour is sublime.

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                                      [–]mexicanfoodtogo 52 points53 points ago

                                      Holy shit! When I was in middle school I had to create a jingle for my music theory class. We were allowed to create a jingle for anything we wanted; one group made a jingle for a broom and pan, another group made one for jellybeans. We definitely weren't limited. My best friend (who didn't do shit with the project other than agree with the name) and I decided to make a jingle for, wait for it, Chocolate Candy BabiesTM ! We could have performed it in class for extra credit but we didn't want any one to like us less than they already did. Besides, we already had A's in the class. Our teacher left a note saying something along the lines of "Chocolate Candy BabiesTM ? That's one of the most demented things I've ever heard of. Good job!" I never thought I'd see the day where this story would be relevant. Too bad its buried. Ah well.

                                      TL;DR

                                      ♫ Chocolate taste,

                                      with a face.

                                      A treat so wild!

                                      You'll have to smile!

                                      You're lost without this bundle of joy.

                                      You can even choose a girl or a boy.

                                      A rich deluctable delight

                                      that will rock your taste buds day and night.

                                      Chocolate caaaaandy babies! ♫

                                      [–]renboZOM 4 points5 points ago

                                      I wish I had 2 up votes to give you.

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                                        [–]stefmor90 422 points423 points ago

                                        You're gonna need an atheist.

                                        [–]Ghotil 135 points136 points ago

                                        Im here! I just had my dinner of roasted baby.

                                        [–]Ameisen 45 points46 points ago

                                        Rotisserie Baby is better.

                                        [–]johnsmcjohn 81 points82 points ago

                                        Nonsense! Everyone knows baby back baby is best.

                                        [–]ohmaniforgotmyacc 18 points19 points ago

                                        Insert Chili's commercial here.

                                        [–]touchy610 21 points22 points ago

                                        The words don't even need to be changed.

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                                                [–]SuperBeast4721 34 points35 points ago

                                                Hey bro. Sorry but I'm stuffed. They had a buffet tonight.

                                                [–]ShittehKitteh 10 points11 points ago

                                                Yep. OP needs to suck it up and eat that baby if they want to retain their membership. If they aren't carrying an A card then, well, leave them be. But that chocolate baby can only sit somewhere for so long before it gets to you.

                                                [–]Haywood_Jafukmi 18 points19 points ago

                                                Technically, as a Jew I could help you out. At the very least I could try to blood the sucker...

                                                [–]PollysLithium 1 point2 points ago

                                                Or a man, it is only chocolate.

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                                                  [–]Middleclasswarrior 335 points336 points ago

                                                  Then give it back to your girlfriend, I'm sure she has no problem eating your babies...

                                                  [–]CatMadeOfFur 107 points108 points ago

                                                  http://i.imgur.com/y4tGG.gif

                                                  [–]Nakotadinzeo 16 points17 points ago

                                                  The doctor seems to like white cheese cheeseits

                                                  [–]MuffinsandTeacups 26 points27 points ago

                                                  That's gum.

                                                  [–]Nakotadinzeo 2 points3 points ago

                                                  He is eating them one at a time (I'm aware I'm just jokeing)

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                                                      [–]Edgar4llanPwn 2 points3 points ago

                                                      Jelly baby?

                                                      [–]Lehrmann 26 points27 points ago

                                                      http://i.imgur.com/YYLZa.gif

                                                      [–]Shappie 6 points7 points ago

                                                      Wha...I...

                                                      WHY?

                                                      [–]StrongCoffeh 5 points6 points ago

                                                      OH MY GOD PUT THAT AWAY

                                                      [–]fistea 5 points6 points ago

                                                      dude

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                                                        [–]Timbo2702 4 points5 points ago

                                                        http://www.instantostrich.com/

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                                                          [–]DubStepSvdMyLife 63 points64 points ago

                                                          Don't bite you'll hurt it. Just suck till it melts

                                                          [–]Dirty_Fuckin_Redneck 91 points92 points ago

                                                          That's what I keep telling her.

                                                          [–]nobuhdy 4 points5 points ago

                                                          I, personally, would rather have my head bit off in one fluid motion than to endure the slow, painful death by melting in some asshole's mouth..

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                                                            [–]ThisNameTookaWhile 60 points61 points ago

                                                            I want to serve these to Trick-or-Treaters.

                                                            [–]johnkrukbjqueen 121 points122 points ago

                                                            Just cover it in ketchup and pretend its a fetus. That way its not like eating a real human.

                                                            [–]NashedPotatos 31 points32 points ago

                                                            Chocolate and ketchup? C'mon man, at least use cherry sauce or something.

                                                            [–]duckglass 42 points43 points ago

                                                            or put it in your uterus and then when you get it sucked out, itll be okay.

                                                            http://i.imgur.com/0yWHf.gif

                                                            [–]johnkrukbjqueen 4 points5 points ago

                                                            I like the cut of your jib...

                                                            [–]ohmaniforgotmyacc 4 points5 points ago

                                                            Risky click.

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                                                                [–]sacula 18 points19 points ago

                                                                I would go to an abortion clinic and as im walking out the door past the protesters I would pull it out of my pocket and take a bite.

                                                                [–]daniibabanii 18 points19 points ago

                                                                Just put it in the microwave for a few seconds, let it melt some so it loses it color and shape, and eat it! You just can't turn down chocolate.

                                                                [–]tomdarch 16 points17 points ago

                                                                Microwaves are actually a great tool for working with chocolate (even for tempering chocolate). But to melt one piece like that means you need to do a series of tiny bursts. Seriously - maybe 3 to 5 seconds, then let it sit for a minute, and check it, another few seconds, let it sit, check it. It's very, very easy to go from solid, to warm, to splattering and burnt.

                                                                [–]hoebeng 10 points11 points ago

                                                                But you'll have to check it when it's a melting baby looking thing. You should take pictures of the melting stages, OP.

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                                                                  [–]Sir_Narwhal 66 points67 points ago

                                                                  Oh my, a true WHAT THE MOTHERFUCKING HOLY FUCK!?!?!

                                                                  [–]tomdarch 72 points73 points ago

                                                                  Seriously. Who the fuck thought that was a good idea? Someone had to think it was a good idea to make that mold!?!? Someone had to think it was a good idea to buy that mold?!?! Someone had to think it was a good idea to offer those chocolates to the people throwing the shower!?!?! The people throwing the shower had to think it was a good idea to pay for those creepy fucking chocolates?!?!

                                                                  What the actual Fuck?

                                                                  [–]panthera213 23 points24 points ago

                                                                  seriously, there is so much creepy edible-baby shit for baby showers it's ridiculous. This site pretty much categorizes a ton of it.

                                                                  [–]not_a_drip[S] 14 points15 points ago

                                                                  I'm in quite a pickle. I'm fat, but I'm also against eating babies..., but I'm also Atheist... FUCK

                                                                  [–]iEATu23 2 points3 points ago

                                                                  We have transforming pickles now? Wow. This fandangled technology is amazing these days.

                                                                  [–]kore464 2 points3 points ago

                                                                  No, no, no. There's no transformation going on. He's atheist who happens to be fat, who happens to be stuck in a pickle. He can't get out of the pickle and therefore can't eat the baby. I think the mystery has been solved, gang!

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                                                                      [–]nereid4114 11 points12 points ago

                                                                      Dude, weird shit goes down at baby showers...

                                                                      [–]BasketOfCats 15 points16 points ago

                                                                      Like the one game where you eat mashed up candy bars out of diapers and try to guess the flavor.

                                                                      Yes, that is a thing.

                                                                      [–]AliceSin 6 points7 points ago

                                                                      That's a nope. I'll just leave my gift at this nice table by the door, you ladies have fun.

                                                                      [–]ohmaniforgotmyacc 2 points3 points ago

                                                                      Da fuq

                                                                      [–]dubstepdinosaur 3 points4 points ago

                                                                      You don't eat them, you smell them.

                                                                      [–]BossMojoman 18 points19 points ago

                                                                      I'm an Atheist, I'll eat it.

                                                                      [–]SprunkMaster 6 points7 points ago

                                                                      Who makes this kind of stuff?

                                                                      More importantly, I want to eat children where to I buy these?

                                                                      [–]MactheDog 6 points7 points ago

                                                                      First thought "I'd bite it's fucking head off."

                                                                      Second thought "what the hell is wrong with me."

                                                                      [–]3kajjak3 6 points7 points ago

                                                                      "Eat this!" What a Modest Proposal...

                                                                      [–]jeblis 6 points7 points ago

                                                                      Well if you don't want it, I guess you'll just have to throw it in a dumpster.

                                                                      [–]inkyj28 10 points11 points ago

                                                                      Just think of it as a gummy bear... head first.

                                                                      [–]Viperbunny 16 points17 points ago

                                                                      My baby shower is this weekend...I would be horrified if my mother in law handed out chocolate like that. I would also be forced to make a joke that it would sustain my atheist's husband's life force...his aunt is very religious, and his mom hates that he is atheist. I am not atheist, but I have no issues with my husband's beliefs. We have many jokes, such as how many babies it takes to sustain his life force, keeping him away from churches so he doesn't burst into flames, or anything else based on ridiculous things his family says. She dislikes me enough, and I know I wouldn't be able to pass up such an opportunity to make such a joke.

                                                                      [–]icky_fingers 5 points6 points ago

                                                                      Seriously.. I don't understand why anyone would want treats like that at their baby shower. What is the point of it? Make baby rattle or pacifier chocolates... just not actual baby chocolates.

                                                                      [–]PhoenixSpell167 2 points3 points ago

                                                                      Congratulations on the bun in your oven!

                                                                      [–]RizzoFromDigg 3 points4 points ago

                                                                      We'll be happy to take it over on r/atheism.

                                                                      [–]broken_radio 2 points3 points ago

                                                                      I only eat these when I'm high on bath salts.

                                                                      [–]ResidentWeeaboo 2 points3 points ago

                                                                      I need to bring a bunch of these to the anti-abortion protesters and start scarfing these things down in front of them.

                                                                      [–]not2oldyet 3 points4 points ago

                                                                      Send it over to r/atheism - they're all baby eaters!!! :-)

                                                                      [–]badaba 8 points9 points ago

                                                                      I would....but then I am an atheist.

                                                                      [–]Sarah_Connor 6 points7 points ago

                                                                      OMG! I LOVE BABIES!.... I just can't eat a whole one...

                                                                      [–]easyantic 5 points6 points ago

                                                                      So, why all the atheists eats babies jokes?

                                                                      [–]armik 6 points7 points ago

                                                                      You didn't get the memo? We have no morals or ethics. We rape, pillage, and steal...then have baby for dessert.

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                                                                        [–]beaglemaster 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        WHY!?!?!

                                                                        [–]justskidding 2 points3 points ago

                                                                        I take it nobody here has seen the freakish baby shower confections on cakewrecks, huh?

                                                                        [–]beanso 2 points3 points ago

                                                                        Dip it in some hard, translucent coating of some sort and then lube it up and stick it up your anus. While you and your girlfriend are just sitting around doing nothing, fake some labor contractions and then shit that fucker out, peel off the coating and EAT THE FUCK OUT OF IT.

                                                                        [–]blacklotus21 2 points3 points ago

                                                                        Sweet jesus. I'm atheists and all, but there is no way I can eat it.

                                                                        [–]brandionacloud 2 points3 points ago

                                                                        send it to China, it'll get eaten there.

                                                                        http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2140702/South-Korea-customs-officials-thousands-pills-filled-powdered-human-baby-flesh.html

                                                                        [–]G8kpr 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        If you can't eat it, then feed it to the Dingo's.

                                                                        [–]SethIsInSchool 2 points3 points ago

                                                                        You are quite obviously not an atheist.

                                                                        [–]No_more_yoga 2 points3 points ago

                                                                        Women do some fucked up stuff at baby showers. My mum was telling me about one she went to where various chocolates were melted and poured in nappies(diapers) and everyone had to eat it with a spoon and figure out which chocolate was which. It looked so close to baby shit she almost vomited...

                                                                        TL;DR women ate chocolate baby shit ಠ_ಠ

                                                                        [–]lavagreen 2 points3 points ago

                                                                        Should put in a pan and slowly melt it.

                                                                        [–]MagicallyDelicioso 3 points4 points ago

                                                                        I'd eat it! Chocolate's chocolate.

                                                                        [–]anxiouswreck 3 points4 points ago

                                                                        More info on these if anyone is interested

                                                                        [–]FallenSnow 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        If the chinese can eat babies, then so can you!

                                                                        [–]star_witness 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        It'll be easier to eat if you take a big knife and cut it into smaller pieces.

                                                                        [–]My_cat_is_cute 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        I was expecting a vague jelly baby shaped chocolate baby.

                                                                        [–]IHAS80085 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Delicious.

                                                                        [–]mynipplesaresore 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Food for the soul.

                                                                        [–]oishiinigiri 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Fuck. That. Shit. That is creepy as fuck. Fuck. The fuck?

                                                                        [–]vernscustoms 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        I wonder if it is baby flavored.

                                                                        [–]playpianoking 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        WTF?!?

                                                                        [–]n0exit 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        If it wasn't hairy, it would look like an aborted fetus.

                                                                        I wouldn't eat it either.

                                                                        [–]kontankarite 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Atheist here. I'll eat it.

                                                                        [–]grimbotronic 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Ribs. Dripping with sauce! Meat falling off the bone.

                                                                        [–]WhaIDontEven 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Was the shower being hosted by the Bishop of Bath and Wells, perchance?

                                                                        [–]HanzKrebs 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        eat just the head and then show the rest to your GF :3

                                                                        [–]Hokie200proof 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Definitely the right subreddit

                                                                        [–]aDildoAteMyBaby 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Could you at least convince your girlfriend to depict my user name?

                                                                        [–]VirtualMonk 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Brotha Lynch Hung baby shower theme. Thats gangster.

                                                                        [–]ruler93 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        /r/atheism wouldn't hesitate

                                                                        [–]Rule_32 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Seriously ladies...wtf...

                                                                        [–]koy5 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Of course you can't. It is fucking creepy.

                                                                        [–]dilleo 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Reminds me of the realistic-baby cake...

                                                                        [–]badab1ng 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Brotha Lynch Hung?

                                                                        [–]occam182 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        What an abortion of an idea.

                                                                        [–]I_RAPE_RATS 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        I would just lick it until its gone, with the tip of my tongue, starting from the back end of it. mmmmmm.

                                                                        [–]CAPTAINxTRIPS 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        I'm an atheist. This is what all my food looks like.

                                                                        [–]macncheez_ 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Creepy

                                                                        [–]xniinja 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        That was quite the modest proposal to get that chocolate.

                                                                        [–]kendrahwithanh 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Oh yes, that is very good babies.

                                                                        [–]juliearnt 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Baby, the other white chocolate.

                                                                        [–]whatthesebitcheswant 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Once you've seen birth, a baby shaped chocolate doesn't seem so bad.

                                                                        [–]spritle6054 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Nom Nom Nom Nom, Babies!

                                                                        [–]danceswithwool 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Just throw it in the microwave and melt it.

                                                                        EDIT: ಠ_ಠ

                                                                        [–]BigDaddy_Delta 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        an atheist can

                                                                        [–]IamA_Werewolf_AMA 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        GET THOSE ATHEISTS IN HERE WE GOT A BABBY NEEDS EATIN'!

                                                                        [–]pc14 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        I know how you feel, uncooked babies taste terrible

                                                                        [–]totalbitch69 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        that...is a very realistic chocolate

                                                                        [–]KaNineteen 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Not finding this here made me feel old. I mean, HE ATE A BABY!

                                                                        [–]amp9122 -1 points0 points ago

                                                                        you dont have to eat it. just kick it.

                                                                        [–]amp9122 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        you dont have to eat it. just kick it.

                                                                        [–]robbiefreeze 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Are fucking kiddin me??

                                                                        [–]Simplemindedgenius97 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        I'd be afraid of eating that thing and my whole life become horror movie gold after that. Obviously you wouldn't benefit considering the baby ripped out your insides., why do I speak?....

                                                                        [–]Aaronmcom 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Did you not eat it because you aren't allowed? Or because you're a pussy?

                                                                        [–]andrew_strange 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        .........the fuck?

                                                                        [–]dooley1 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        That is vile.

                                                                        [–]lncohen 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Is it bad that my first thought was to SMASH IT?!?!

                                                                        [–]PollysLithium 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Looks delicious.

                                                                        [–]hwood 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Get in my belly!

                                                                        [–]Hungrydog 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Just do what we do in Mississippi, just throw it away. It will not be missed and you can quite easily get another one later. It's not like those are hard to come by.

                                                                        [–]coatrack68 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        :(

                                                                        [–]Mike_Crotch 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Eat half of it and take a picture. Post the picture to r/gore. ??? Profit.

                                                                        [–]Esoteric787 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Cover it in cherry sauce and leave it on top of the toilet

                                                                        [–]guyinhat 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Oh boy here come the baby eating jokes..

                                                                        [–]Warvanov 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        This belongs on r/atheism.

                                                                        [–]words-as-a-medium 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Now, post to r/atheism with the caption: "My girlfriend went to a baby shower and brought back a tasty snack." Then, watch the karma train pull into the station.

                                                                        [–]giraffe_taxi 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Easy, just use the animal crackers method (head, limbs, body) rather than the Easter bunny method (ears, face, body.)

                                                                        [–]TophToast 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Be a man, suck it down like Christopher Reeves.

                                                                        [–]super_AWESOMENESS 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        I could go for some baby right about now.

                                                                        [–]Iokuas 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Good god, that's horrific.

                                                                        [–]squier101 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Everybody knows you <i>have</i> to eat the head first

                                                                        [–]nilum 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        I know we have an r/mildlyinteresting, but perhaps we need an r/mildlydisturbing.

                                                                        [–]Toasted_Polar_Bear 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        How many licks...

                                                                        [–]MrsNickCage 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        All you need to do is talk to Jonathan Swift: http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Modest_Proposal

                                                                        [–]CiD7707 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        "But you can eat the baby!"

                                                                        [–]j3rmz 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        You can't eat a baby? You're obviously not atheist.

                                                                        [–]lolpancakeslol -1 points0 points ago

                                                                        /r/shittyfoodporn material right here.

                                                                        [–]Post_op_FTM 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        who the fuck thinks serving these kinds of things is ok?

                                                                        [–]Netegexi 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        Another female... what a shame. Send it to the Wonka factory.

                                                                        [–]CowsWithGuns304 1 point2 points ago

                                                                        OM NOM NOM... BABIES!

                                                                        [–]jeblis 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        How are you going to tell if it tastes like the real thing if you don't eat it?

                                                                        load more comments (275 replies)

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