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top 200 commentsshow all 399

[–]bohknows 136 points137 points ago

Camouflage practice? Sounds like something Buster Bluth would win a prize for.

[–]tophermeyer 90 points91 points ago

Army had a half day today, Mother.

[–]wakewolfie 47 points48 points ago

You can always recognize a Milford man.

[–]DemonicFlames 4 points5 points ago

One word: Waldo.

[–]sundowntg 1 point2 points ago

It's much easier to get a gorilla in than sand racing.

[–]virati 1 point2 points ago

Still no Hero Squad...

[–]drumellow 1 point2 points ago

I will be neither seen nor heard

[–]TheDroopy 36 points37 points ago

ITT: everyone who has ever been in the military

Plus me, wondering if "camouflage practice" is a real thing

[–]Hawkeye1226 19 points20 points ago

only if you are a sniper

[–]Ridderjoris 13 points14 points ago

I'm in recon and we do that too, it is however not as simple as camo practice. It's more like camouflage is a large part of every exercise, mainly because we are supposed to be unseen.

[–]Ridderjoris 7 points8 points ago

Well, no. But in the real world it works like that. 6 People in enemy territory won't last long, and the chances of us going on recce to find intell on weapon systems far more powerful than ours is quite large (you don't use a tank to find out where they hid a machinegun, etc). The only advantage we have when embarked is the speed and agility of our recce vehicles. Besides our greatly increased capability to see and hide ourselves of course. Fenneks only provide cover against small arms fire.

[–]Strykar 1 point2 points ago

So how do you hide that vehicle? You just leave it far away from the enemy and walk, or is there something else?

[–]Ridderjoris 1 point2 points ago

It's only 1.8 meters high and only has a noticable infrared signature on the back. If you know your terrain you can get almost anywhere. In the cases we can't, it's left behind. We do the most of our exercises on foot (or they will just tell us it's "broken" and the mission is "vital", in many cases.)

[–]postsinsensitively 0 points1 point ago

hahaha, "BJ Smegma"

Genius

[–]hemingwayszombycorps 0 points1 point ago

Get walked on?

[–]Ridderjoris 0 points1 point ago

Part of the job.

[–]Fezaliini 0 points1 point ago

In Finland everyone has to attend those.

[–]postsinsensitively 0 points1 point ago

Yes for:

a) Snipers/reconnaissance

b) New recruits / training recruits

c) people in selection for sniping roles, or special forces in some instances depending on role

[–]TheDroopy 0 points1 point ago

I guess I was just wondering how much practice goes into camouflage.

[–]betterpc 88 points89 points ago

Proper size high quality pic http://i.imgur.com/t2M2w.jpg

[–]LooksLikeANewAccount 4 points5 points ago

Thank you, sir!

[–]rumnscurvy 63 points64 points ago

Lord Vetinari, ruler of Ankh-Morpork, the greatest city in the fictional world of the Discworld book series, was trained as an Assassin in his youth. He passed all his exams with flying colours, except one. Stealth. The instructor claim he never showed up, but anyone who has obtained the rare copies of Vetinari's own monograph on cutting edge concealment techniques, on the use of dark greens and browns, would know better than to believe that.

[–]TheKillerToast 7 points8 points ago

God I love Terry Pratchett.

[–]Arousingly_Awkward 0 points1 point ago

Alas, I have but one upvote to give. Carry on, and keep up the good fight.

[–]aequitas3 0 points1 point ago

FABRICATI DIEM, PVNC!

[–]Chickenlikengood 153 points154 points ago

Ah, the good old days when we rolled our sleeves. Now we all look like asses with our sleeves down like the army :(

[–]NYcop21 58 points59 points ago

our old DI used to make us roll up our sleeves while we did push ups, our hands weren't allowed to leave the ground. it was funny to watch, not so fun to participate. Semper Fi brother.

[–]Ace_Marine 49 points50 points ago

How is that even possible

[–]brodie21 113 points114 points ago

Copious amounts of "Goddammit Smith! Roll those sleeves up!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?! HANDS ON THE GROUND! DON'T FUCKING ASK HOW! DO IT!!!"

[–]Whats4dinner 16 points17 points ago

Insults. You forgot the insults. Nobody in the world has such a vivid and expressive repertoire of pugilistic verbalisms as a DI under a full head of steam.

[–]TheKillerToast 9 points10 points ago

It is literally unbelievable it's like a Masters level class of shittalkology and folksy insults are part of the DI course.

[–]ButtFuckSlutsGoNuts 14 points15 points ago

"Push goddammit or I WILL include a section in my dissertation about the things I will do to your sisters on family day!"

[–]Whats4dinner 7 points8 points ago

That's the truth and there is no finer practitioner alive today other than R. Lee Ermey. Genius has many faces.

[–]b0w3n 18 points19 points ago

I would not make it into the military.

I would've devised some method inside my uniform so I could reach down with my mouth and pull my contraption up, raising my sleeves. Just to be a smart ass. I would spend copious amounts of whatever free time I had devising the system.

[–]Team_Khalifa 50 points51 points ago

...There's almost no free time. With the little free time you do have I bet that's not what you'd do.

[–]sndzag1 51 points52 points ago

Wank. You mean he'd wank.

[–]Effthebitch 69 points70 points ago

Dude. Wanking just doesn't happen in basic. You're tired all the time. You're sore. Your body is worn out. You're surrounded by dudes, the stench is often unbearable, and the best looking thing you've seen since you got there is a 350 pound black woman named Loquisha who works at the mini PX. Your peter simply retreats into your body for 2 months, cursing you for your life choices.

[–]digitalscale 27 points28 points ago

Never underestimate me my friend. Never.

[–]Effthebitch 23 points24 points ago

In all fairness, I did try once. Middle of the night, and as tired as I was, I couldn't sleep. Even dead silent in the bathroom stall, I couldn't even get it up. Which is weird, because truthfully, I could fap nearly anywhere. Just not there.

[–]JackieCam 11 points12 points ago

I masturbated in basic once. Exactly once.

But I'm a chick so it seems easier to me for whatever reason.

I've asked lots of my guy friends though, don't know anyone else who did.

[–]oorahyutkill 3 points4 points ago

Bull shit, I used to beat off in other platoon's 'rain rooms.'

I had gear guard a lot because I could memorize all of the general orders n shit, so that's waht I'd do. Mark my god damned territory.

Fuck anyone who wasn't 3rd battalion.

[–]DCoxRox69 5 points6 points ago

Insane India!

[–]ButtFuckSlutsGoNuts 4 points5 points ago

First day, all the wannabe Romeos were waxing poetic about how hard it was for them to be away from women. I said "fuck that, I'm gonna miss jacking off more" and they all looked at me like I was crazy.

You know what though? I was right.

[–]Effthebitch 3 points4 points ago

A guy named ButtFuckSlutsGoNuts just had a talk with me about jacking off. I don't know what to say.

[–]oshaCaller 0 points1 point ago

I rubbed several out. I spent 6 months in basic, fucking injuries.

It was probably 4 months until I decided I had too. I had the wettest of all fucking dreams. Not fucking cool at all. Didn't want that to happen again. My physical therapist was hot, popping a boner with running shorts or sweat pants on was lame.

I was in the 2nd platoon to be isued the marpat pattern uniforms. There were still people in the medical platoon with the old style blotchy camo when I left. I was glad I missed out on the boot shining.

[–]Effthebitch 0 points1 point ago

You know, I actually feel bad for those of you who missed the boot shining. It sucked at first, but once I learned how to do it well, it actually became something I enjoyed. It was a nice change of pace to be doing that rather than something that involved kicking our asses even more.

[–]Team_Khalifa 0 points1 point ago

I know a guy who wanked it on the first day. He was crazy

[–]Effthebitch 1 point2 points ago

I was 17 when I went to basic. Not gonna lie, I was too terrified to even consider it.

[–]Ridderjoris 1 point2 points ago

Only if the nightmares kept him awake.

[–]Admiral_Spanky 2 points3 points ago

"The following things will be completed by lights tomorrow. Don't get out of your bunks! We require you to get your eight hours. Let the pixie army complete it overnight." wink. (exit Staff Sergeant)

[–]odysseus88 13 points14 points ago

This is from OCS, were you get 3 to 4 hours of sleep a night. Also, all the smart asses got the boot by week 7.

[–]BenCelotil 1 point2 points ago

Piece of string tied to each cuff, running up the sleeve, over the back, and around to under the collar.

Start pushups, duck head down, pull string.

Saved you a couple of minutes.

[–]DCoxRox69 1 point2 points ago

BITE THEM! CHEW CHEW CHEW PUSH PUSH CHEW PUSH ROLL YOUR GOD DAMN SLEEVES UP!

[–]NYcop21 0 points1 point ago

USE YOUR TEETH MARINE, OOHRAH

[–]we_love_dassie 0 points1 point ago

Maybe it was to force to do one handed ones? I dono, I wouldn't make a very good drill instructor, I can't raise my voice and get taken seriously at the same time.

[–]patmcdoughnut 19 points20 points ago

Where does the general keep his armies?

[–]sndzag1 13 points14 points ago

I have never heard this, so I googled it. I am clearly still in the 2nd grade. It was hilarious.

[–]keikii 3 points4 points ago

In his barracks? TELL ME THE ANSWER!

[–]colloquy 9 points10 points ago

In his sleevies.

[–]oky13o 4 points5 points ago

Not sure, but the drill sergeant kept them in his panties.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Trapshooter148 29 points30 points ago

Good thing we have mature people like PLACENTA_IS_YUMMY to keep us all on track guys.

[–]HORSE_COCK_JUGGLER 10 points11 points ago

PLACENTA_IS_YUMMY is a credit to all of us "all caps with underscores" usernames.

[–]WhatTheFedex 2 points3 points ago

It's like some elite club of Reddit...

[–]YOU_TOOK_MY_USERNAME 7 points8 points ago

IM HERE

[–]YES_THIS_IS_DOG 2 points3 points ago

I AM HERE TOO

[–]BRUTALLY_OBVIOUS 1 point2 points ago

WHATS GOING ON

[–]patmcdoughnut 15 points16 points ago

UP HIS SLEEVIES

[–]thebugguy 3 points4 points ago

Indeed. What's next, Velcro?

[–]SlickTricks 12 points13 points ago

Velcro, what a rip off.

[–]thebugguy 0 points1 point ago

Buh dum cha

[–]nomofica 3 points4 points ago

Bah dum tss

FTFY

[–]Dilios 2 points3 points ago

I don't know about you but we folded our sleeves devil pup.

[–]TheKillerToast 1 point2 points ago

We did too until last year =(

[–]FAStalin 2 points3 points ago

We always had them down in 29.

[–]exzyle2k 1 point2 points ago

Why not just plant another tree and make it 30 Palms? I never understood that.

[–]tuba_man 0 points1 point ago

Yup. I was in the band there. It was always amusing watching boots lose their shit whenever we'd do a Change of Command or Retirement on a sleeves-up base.

[–]EvilGrimace 0 points1 point ago

I honestly was not aware there were sleeve up/down bases - I recall visiting 29 Palms and people had sleeves up at the time, considering it was a season based thing. Then again, this was around 13 years ago.

[–]240mikex 3 points4 points ago

Corps has changed, I got out in 2009 before the ending of rolling sleeves and the start of the CFT...

[–]MD_Lurker 23 points24 points ago

Whoa we got a salt dog here.

[–]240mikex 7 points8 points ago

here we go... whos got the bigger dick round 1

[–]MD_Lurker 1 point2 points ago

Lol, meet @ the smoke pit for tape measure!

Seriously though, isn't it pretty crazy how the Corps is changing? Been out for a few years now and it seems like it would be a different Corps if I went back in today. Like you said, no rolled sleeves, a new PT uniform, CFT? Iraq is pretty much over and Afghanistan is winding down. I wonder sometimes what a peacetime USMC would be like... probably more games?

But I guess that's how all "old Corps" Marines feel, even if only a few years out; that's if we rate that title now.

[–]odysseus88 4 points5 points ago

Yeah RIP silkies. My junk doesn't spin around at PT nearly as much now.

[–]Ridderjoris 1 point2 points ago

In the Dutch army we had these PT shorts that were just horrible (discontinued last year)

I later saw a picture of my step-dad (retired ltkol) from 1972 wearing the same shorts. Epiphany.

[–]240mikex 1 point2 points ago

its a vicious cycle, i wouldnt want to know what peacetime USMC would be like, i could barely stand garrison life

[–]BaconBombThief 2 points3 points ago

Nowadays, at least if you're a POG whose battalion just got back from our last Afghan deployment EVER, things are plummeting in a downward garrison spiral. Duty has to wear C's now, random unannounced field days happen on top of the weekly ones, everyone has to wear C's on the last Friday of every month. 1st sgt's are going through barracks more, and last week mine was unsatisfied and decided to make the NCOs field day the building, which led to all types of bullshit for the troops. And walking off of a sidewalk and on the grass in front of battalion hq is now spparently equivalent to digging up chesty's grave and giving him a titty twister. We'll be goose stepping to work every day in our A's in no time. There's never been a brighter light at the end of a tunnel than the EAS at the end of today's knife-hand gauntlet

[–]EvilGrimace 0 points1 point ago

I was a bit confused by all of this, as someone who got out in 2002. At this time, I think I saw someone wearing the digital cammies once or twice.

[–]beanmosheen 1 point2 points ago

We rolled our sleeves too. We where just as pissed off.

[–]ShakeableHippo 0 points1 point ago

The army ( at least the Canadian army) only rolls down their sleeves when they are out in the field. Source: I was a cadet.

[–]Chickenlikengood 0 points1 point ago

That's what it used to be but now it's sleeves down all the time.

[–]nickdngr 0 points1 point ago

Artificial intelligence?

[–]boydrh 0 points1 point ago

yeah, because we looked real cool wearing what amounted to a jacket year round and just rolled up our jacket sleeves during the summer.

[–]Death_Please_Hurry 1 point2 points ago

I hear they are coming back up next summer... I have hope.

[–]Enjoi2021 1 point2 points ago

Would you rather trade your sleeves for the Navy Working Uniform...I didn't think so.

[–]Chickenlikengood 0 points1 point ago

Hell no!

[–]240mikex 38 points39 points ago

Why are the DI's wearing soft covers? WHERE ARE MY KILL HATS

[–]metalicd5 9 points10 points ago

Probably about to step off for a march, they didn't wear campaign covers for those.

[–]FAStalin 0 points1 point ago

Mine did. I think.

[–]Fenix_VI 7 points8 points ago

This was taken at OCS in Quantico. SI's don't wear the campaign covers there.

[–]c3llist9 22 points23 points ago

My cousin went to OCS in Quantico!

...I have no other contribution to this conversation.

[–]TigerWylde 8 points9 points ago

that'll do donkey, that'll do.

[–]FAStalin 0 points1 point ago

Every Marine officer goes to OCS at Quantico nowadays.

[–]norton617 0 points1 point ago

Nowadays meaning since the sixties.

[–]FAStalin 4 points5 points ago

I didn't want some pedantic Redditor crawling up my ass about some quasi-OCS they had in bumfuck Montana during Korea, so I added that qualifier.

[–]pridetwo 0 points1 point ago

True story, I was set on going to OCS my freshman year of college. It sounded like a great opportunity and direction for my career (I'm sure it still is to potential candidates), but almost all the way through the app process I realized military life just wasn't for me. I'm sure the recruiter I was working with was none too pleased when I told him I'd decided to pursue other opportunities as I was a good match on paper for the program, but I know people in the military and it just takes a different type of mentality to succeed there than I have.

[–]240mikex 0 points1 point ago

that would make sense, idk I came from the island

[–]Fenix_VI 0 points1 point ago

No worries, when I went there I was expecting that they would have worn the campaign covers. The most i got to see of those was when one of our SI's brought his out of the hut to show us.

[–]Cephelopodia 1 point2 points ago

Only time I saw one up in Quantico was in the Museum of the Marine Corps. I think it is actually Dan Daly's.

[–]COXIMUS 1 point2 points ago

everywhere you go, people want to know where you come from

[–]muskoka83 -1 points0 points ago

Happy recent Cake Day! :)

[–]240mikex 1 point2 points ago

thanks!

[–]hank7323 1 point2 points ago

Gunny Angell, I wasn't in his Co, but I heard him chew out kids like god damn bubblegum.

[–]odysseus88 4 points5 points ago

He's a sergeant instructor at OCS. It's all soft covers, no campaign covers.

[–]BizarroFrisbee3000 2 points3 points ago

This looks like OCS. Sergeant Instructors wear 8-points (soft covers) all the time there.

[–]ImaginaryPoliceForce 1 point2 points ago

This could be at OCS. They're referred as Sergeant Instructors instead of normal DI's. They wore the 8-point covers instead of the campaign covers.

[–]igobywill 1 point2 points ago

This has to be OCS MY Drill Instructors wore Campaign Covers the whole time. Only saw a soft cover during the Crucible and back to Campaign covers right after.

[–]hairydiablo132 0 points1 point ago

He could also be a DI in training perhaps? We had a few come "practice" on us. They all wore soft covers as they had not earned the Campaign Cover yet.

[–]Cephelopodia 0 points1 point ago

I don't think so in this case...I'd recognize that squadbay anywhere. I used to use those lowered portions of the ceiling to stretch my legs out. Looks like Quantico to me.

[–]avocategory 15 points16 points ago

Three times in a row, I misread the title as "Oprah."

I was rather confused.

[–]Joshjelly[S] 5 points6 points ago

It was rather close. The drill instructor gave Smith a compliment. It could be confused as the drill instructor buying Smith a car.

[–]avocategory 16 points17 points ago

you drop and give me fifty, you drop and give me fifty, EVERBODY DROP AND GIVE ME FIFTYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!

[–]AlexSud 24 points25 points ago

Didnt see this repost today!

[–]Team_Khalifa 7 points8 points ago

Thank you sir!

[–]lovable_oaf 30 points31 points ago

Ah yes the good old days. Sleeve rolling, screaming, no one crying because they got sand in their vagina. I miss em

[–]Denies_Errything 33 points34 points ago

no one crying because they got sand in their vagina

To be fair, that's because they use duct tape now.

[–]TigerWylde 9 points10 points ago

would suck getting duct tape in your vagina..

[–]Denies_Errything 15 points16 points ago

Only when you go to peel it off, but sand is foreverforeverforeverforeverforever .

[–]Theshli 1 point2 points ago

You wonder why they refer to it as a "clam"

[–]Denies_Errything 0 points1 point ago

a clam is just a specific shape, theres also beavers, homers, snatchs... they don't all look like clams.

[–]Deagle_Shitter 7 points8 points ago

Excuse me because I'm not in the army, but what's it like now?

[–]i_forget_my_userids 13 points14 points ago

From his comment, I'd assume everyone is crying because they got sand in their vaginae.

[–]neomatrix248 3 points4 points ago

You don't miss them, you're just mad that other people don't have to go through the same shit you did.

[–]dalgeek 8 points9 points ago

Reminds me of this scene:

Sergeant Major: Soldier, how did you get so close to me?

Chavez: Sniper approached the instructor by being a sneaky bastard, Sergeant Major!

[–]rohei 1 point2 points ago

I wonder if soldiers are allowed to swear like that when talking to a senior officer.

[–]DefinitelyRelephant 11 points12 points ago

Veteran here, if you use profanity or forget to utilize the proper levels of deference when speaking to a senior officer (field grade), you can count on your entire chain of command being shit on, and the shit just snowballs as it goes down the chain.. by the time it gets to you, you might as well just kill yourself.

[–]Ridderjoris 3 points4 points ago

If you're not a slacking moron they will secretly enjoy a little filth. With a littly smirk you will be told to do whatever the rest is doing, only it will sound like punishment. It is however not punishment.

If you are a slacking moron you will be told so, and then be told to do twice what the rest is doing. It will sound like punishment, which it actually is.

[–]GoddamnDiplomat 2 points3 points ago

Senior enlisted. And occasionally.

[–]Ow_you_shot_me 0 points1 point ago

I did that once....

I remember that day in my nightmares..... vividly.

[–]goodapollo777 7 points8 points ago

"Recruit, take your hands out of your pockets!" "Sir, this recruit's hands are not in his pockets!" "Recruit, I said TAKE YOUR HANDS OUT OF YOUR POCKETS!" "Sir, these are SHEATHS FOR THIS RECRUIT'S KNIFE HANDS!"

[–]DanielLikesPie 3 points4 points ago

I don't get it. :(

[–]Septuo 3 points4 points ago

Camouflage training(basically how to hide), not seen during it, must be very good.

[–]janders4 7 points8 points ago

That gunny was my heavy hat at OCS in 2009. He got booted from the USMC last year when it was discovered that he and his gunny wife were involved in extracurricular activities.... http://militarytimes.com/blogs/battle-rattle/2012/05/21/behind-the-cover-the-gunnies-were-swingers/

[–]stringbean315 -1 points0 points ago

His wife is busted.

[–]pridetwo 0 points1 point ago

thus, swinging.

[–]aggrazel 1 point2 points ago

[–]mozza5 2 points3 points ago

Emo Phillips joke.

[–]TacoPaiPai 1 point2 points ago

Where is this from?

[–]zerg_rush_lol 0 points1 point ago

Well it did make me chuckle slightly. Ah, dry humor.

[–]breckfreeskier6699 2 points3 points ago

how is this still getting upvotes?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

He didn't see him the last time this was posted either. You think he'd have remembered

[–]Draziil 4 points5 points ago

I'd never make it in the army. I have a real problem with authority telling me to do something impossible or telling me two different things that contradict eachother and then get mad at me when I try to do either one, or get pissed when I ask genuine questions then they tell me to sit down shut up and make me feel like an idiot. I get discipline, I took shodokan for four years, but some of the stuff you see COs do to their troops seems downright abusive.

[–]Reaper91394 3 points4 points ago

Its all on purpose to break you down, to learn to deal with the stress and confusion, then build you up as a solider/marine... etc etc

[–]kochier 0 points1 point ago

Yeah, I don't see why they don't answer questions. You think they would want you to have a better understanding of the task at hand, but they always seem more keen on abusing their power. I wouldn't be able to take it, I've been taught "if you don't know ask", you should always know the why as well as the how.

[–]EvilGrimace 1 point2 points ago

I've seen guys in bootcamp crap themselves out of fear of asking to use the restroom.

[–]Cephelopodia 0 points1 point ago

They do answer questions at the school depicted here.

[–]boydrh 1 point2 points ago

there is a time and place for everything, you don't want people who are so accustomed to asking "but, why...?" every time you tell them to do something because when it really matters, peoples' lives are on the line. conversely, if you have a good supervisor they will tell you what to do in a way that you don't have to ask why (e.g. "take that fucking hill" vs. "we need to shut down that machine gun nest so 1st platoon can get through to the LZ")

[–]TheKillerToast 2 points3 points ago

I have always had problems with authority too but when I joined the Marines I knew from the second I went down to MEPS I wouldn't have a problem because I had a lot of respect for the Gunnys and SSgts there and especially when I was at boot, my SDI was insane.

This is us picking up our DIs http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1nZ_A_jWjpg

The gigantic white guy SSgt Webb got switched to another platoon in the first week for Spartan Kicking a recruit through the rack and than ITing him for being in his rack, was one of the funniest things I've ever seen.

[–]boydrh 3 points4 points ago

as a former Marine, I just got a Chesty Puller sized boner.

[–]TheKillerToast 0 points1 point ago

Rahh

[–]tinster9 0 points1 point ago

Damn. How did you get a vid of that? I wish I had that from meeting my SDI. All in their go fasters.

[–]Fyrus 1 point2 points ago

Same here. I've been reading all the comments from military people in this thread and past threads... makes me nervous just to read the comments.

[–]Cephelopodia 0 points1 point ago

This photo is from Marine Corps Officer Candidate School. I can't speak for other training pipelines, but at the school pictured, they do let you ask questions, as long as you do so in the proper protocol, and yes, they do want you to understand what's going on so you can think on your feet. They also want you to think clearly under pressure, hence the harsh treatment to see if you can do so. They do not want unthinking machines.

[–]ExteriorAmoeba 1 point2 points ago

...camoflauge practice?

[–]PhatDude2456 2 points3 points ago

What is this sorcery?! Reddit posting something from ifunny? I thought it was supposed to be the other way around.

[–]TheAjaxkiller 2 points3 points ago

It is, reddit posted it, then ishit posted it, then reddit posted it again Edit: Spelling

[–]Critram 2 points3 points ago

This post is old. It's just a repost.

[–]Yaced123 0 points1 point ago

Sooooo disappointed that I had to scroll this far in the comments to read what I was looking for- that this guy just reposted. I was convinced that maybe for a split second that ifunny had original content posted to reddit just for a split second though.

[–]Colinizhere8 -2 points-1 points ago

Ifunny reposted this from Reddit and you reposted this from ifunny, you sir are pathetic.

[–]MeaninglessDebateMan -1 points0 points ago

Took me way too long to get the joke.

I need to sleep more.

[–]remhawk99 -1 points0 points ago

At which point the Gunny would say "Don't thank me, I get thanked on insert pay day here!" Just pray to sweet Jesus that today is not that day.

[–]gaedikus 1 point2 points ago

when i was aboard the MCRD i was sure of a few things:

  1. you never thank your drill instructor. ever.
  2. you were "bitch", "faggot", "retard", "motherfucker", "slut", "piece of shit", "hey you", "recruit", or "recruit something", where "something" was your last name if you were LUCKY.
  3. camo practice doesnt exist, now get on the drill instructors goddamn quarterdeck.

[–]dml03045 0 points1 point ago

From now on you will speak only when spoken to, and the first and last words out of your filthy sewers will be "Sir". Do you maggots understand that?

[–]LtSpeirs 0 points1 point ago

[–]KillerKittenMittens 1 point2 points ago

Except for the whole saying "sir" part...

[–]derpyven 1 point2 points ago

"THANK YOU? THANK YOU? Bitch if I wanted to be thanked I'd have asked for it."

[–]diemaco_kid 1 point2 points ago

i dont think the conversation would go quite like that, generally if you call a sergeant "sir" things tend to take a turn for the worse rather quickly.

[–]pibroch 0 points1 point ago

Seriously disappointed that I did not see the source of this joke here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ab6LWXeNDA 4:15

[–]AliasUndercover 0 points1 point ago

...damnit.

[–]I_refuse 0 points1 point ago

Goodness, the DI's snarl.

[–]FemaCampDirector 0 points1 point ago

He didn't see the IED later either.

[–]norton617 0 points1 point ago

Ahh, pick up day at OCS. Good times..

[–]tgould55 0 points1 point ago

This is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while.

[–]micahshell 0 points1 point ago

Smith the best part of you fell down the crack of your mamma's ass and ended up as a grass stain on the bed sheets!

[–]GambleGambleGamble 0 points1 point ago

Sir to an Enlisted? Smith never made that mistake again.

[–]the_friendly_one 0 points1 point ago

"Camouflage practice?" Dis nigga serious?

[–]uscgmike 0 points1 point ago

When I was in basic saying "Thank you" would be punished much worse than not being seen.

[–]AndyBrixton 0 points1 point ago

hes that good with the camouflage practice nobody could see him.

[–]Radico87 0 points1 point ago

One of the many reasons I'd be no good as an enlisted grunt is because I don't take people who yell at others seriously. It's not intimidating and all they get is a hoarse throat. And what if they have something important to articulate later on but can't? Silly, silly.

[–]MyGooseisLoose 0 points1 point ago

You seriously underestimate the ferocity with which they verbally tear into you. It's truly unlike anything you will ever experience, see, or hear about in your life.

[–]Unusableid 0 points1 point ago

Fuck your ifunny repost

[–]cameronmcc 0 points1 point ago

Emo Phillips

[–]SquishyCrayon 0 points1 point ago

Repost :/

[–]Batmaners 0 points1 point ago

Here's something I was told, don't know how accurate it is, but it sounded good when he told it.

It's not "hoo-rah", it's HOOAH (this I know to be true), spelled HUA.

H : Heard
U : Understood
A : Acknowledged

The superior will shout orders, and to ensure the troops understood, he will shout "HUA?" to which a morale boosting "HUA" is the only possible answer.

It's a lot better than some of the superiors I've had that mae everyone answer "seen" as a form of knowledge acknowledgement.

[–]fedeftw 0 points1 point ago

this gif i posted like once a week, lol

[–]iAnonymousGuy 1 point2 points ago

wipe that disgusting grin off your face, private pyle!

[–]Hanzaru 1 point2 points ago

Fuck you and fuck those damn reposts.

[–]j8905121 0 points1 point ago

STAHP!!!