I'd rather not, thanks

dntcareaboutkarma · 2012-10-15T16:00:45+00:00

It's nice to see those "reward programs" finally paying off.

Siddlypi · 2012-10-15T16:19:01+00:00

"Unexpected item in the bagging area"

flytaggart1 · 2012-10-15T15:07:59+00:00

Honestly, at this point in my dry spell, I'll put my penis anywhere.

peterallen900 · 2012-10-15T17:10:01+00:00

As a Tesco employee, I must know how this was done. Please don't say shopped, please don't say shopped.

kristafer825 · 2012-10-15T15:40:12+00:00

Okay machine, but only because you asked nicely.

Mcbodied · 2012-10-15T15:02:02+00:00

Machines... They're learning to have feelings...

zaisanskunk · 2012-10-15T16:22:44+00:00

FEED ME A STRAY CAT

tellmebouttherabbits · 2012-10-15T16:35:42+00:00

You'd get charged for a Slim Jim.

lwest340 · 2012-10-15T16:30:34+00:00

I don't know why you wouldn't. I got 25% off my last purchase by using my penis points.

Awesome_BaconTaco · 2012-10-15T16:36:36+00:00

You are turning down a great time, my friend. Here's some words of wisdom: when random objects offer you to penetrate them, never deny. You never know what could happen, so it is best just to stick your slong into things and hope for the best.

Doctor_Woo · 2012-10-15T18:13:48+00:00

UNEXPECTED ITEM IN BAGGING AREA

rlyx6x · 2012-10-15T17:12:49+00:00

I'd rather not upvote, thanks:

title	comnts	points	age	/r/
A new way of paying at Tesco!	3^coms	18^pts	3^mos	funny
Well Tesco, if you insist...	119^coms	1491^pts	2^mos	WTF
I'm not sure what to do here...	4^coms	15^pts	6^mos	funny
If you insist...	96^coms	1290^pts	7^mos	WTF

source: karmadecay

DIP_MY_BALLS_IN_IT · 2012-10-15T16:22:32+00:00

The one next to it probably says "Please insert cat"

NoveltyAccount5928 · 2012-10-15T16:16:43+00:00

Dat self-checkout ...

kazez2 · 2012-10-15T15:56:47+00:00

Just the tip?

Lettuce_Get_Weird · 2012-10-15T16:07:04+00:00

Unless there was a warning to stop me, a was gonna follow my instincts and do it anyway.

cvas · 2012-10-15T16:35:28+00:00

shooped.

heardlb · 2012-10-15T16:09:45+00:00

You have to pay to play

2012-10-15T16:43:54+00:00

[deleted]

Bigman61 · 2012-10-15T16:48:02+00:00

Well.... if you say so.

bbdesigncof · 2012-10-15T17:04:18+00:00

Damn automatic checker autocorrect...

mrdoink20 · 2012-10-15T17:06:26+00:00

Well that caught me by surprise.

lookatmeme · 2012-10-15T17:07:43+00:00

"Please place your item in the bragging area."

kungfu_kickass · 2012-10-15T17:09:48+00:00

Sorry I am apparently retarded, but joking aside... why is this machine asking you to insert a penis? Pennies? Photoshop?

jamesd2011 · 2012-10-15T17:10:51+00:00

that's probably the most forward self-service machine I've ever seen. clearly this is a sex bot trapped in a grocery store

kernelhappy · 2012-10-15T17:23:57+00:00

Talk about encouraging a consumerist society.

"Honey, I'll run to the store and buy you tampons, no problem..."

sunny_lifton · 2012-10-15T17:24:52+00:00

way ahead of ya machine

AsskickMcGee · 2012-10-15T17:30:38+00:00

First bank tellers, then cashiers, and now they've finally made a automated replacement for Your Mom.

Bashoda · 2012-10-15T17:36:51+00:00

If that's wrong I don't want to be right

lil_buddha · 2012-10-15T17:39:54+00:00

Ok, so we've gone a few steps too far since my credit card was declined. What? No, I do not want to follow you into the back alley...

ms-whatever · 2012-10-15T17:51:31+00:00

I should give this line a try with my boyfriend next time.

neverendingdrums · 2012-10-15T17:53:52+00:00

Every little helps.

sadger · 2012-10-15T17:59:34+00:00

Looks an awful lot like this picture only edited in some kind of sneaky way. http://i.imgur.com/yFWdx.jpg

destroyosaurusrex · 2012-10-15T18:01:41+00:00

Gimme 20 bucks pussy.. I'll do it.

thatguy147 · 2012-10-15T18:01:47+00:00

Repost, downvote

mysanityisrelative · 2012-10-15T18:01:52+00:00

Where would it go?

extralong · 2012-10-15T18:05:10+00:00

fuckin tesco! literally.

TriMageRyan · 2012-10-15T18:07:54+00:00

My mother had the same sign.....thus how I was born.

AFewSecondsAgoDouche · 2012-10-15T18:10:54+00:00

In before /r/ShitRedditSays throws a fit due to it not being inclusive of women.

holyfear · 2012-10-15T18:12:04+00:00

The day I can pay for my groceries with my penis will be a glorious day.

laptopcouch · 2012-10-15T18:14:10+00:00

its not really a request

Phoenixking777 · 2012-10-15T18:22:06+00:00

Rapist machine!! D:

ugly_babies · 2012-10-15T18:24:45+00:00

Do it and see what happens.

Jaznx · 2012-10-15T18:36:02+00:00

Doesn't matter, had sex.

Notloc24 · 2012-10-15T18:53:59+00:00

"excuse me, could I speak to your manager? One of your machines is coming on to me..."

Arganovaa · 2012-10-15T19:02:30+00:00

I think it's a cylon.

ill_tonkso · 2012-10-15T19:04:39+00:00

The photoshopping is strong here.

arise_chicken · 2012-10-15T19:12:48+00:00

Because I had a row. In the shop. With a chip and pin machine.

uSeeWhatiDidThere · 2012-10-15T19:19:51+00:00

Insert penis
cash comes out

Leigho7 · 2012-10-15T19:27:53+00:00

I'm back from studying abroad in Scotland, and now I really miss tesco.

Fuuuuuuuun · 2012-10-15T19:34:07+00:00

Oh tesco's!

laquerhead · 2012-10-15T20:06:36+00:00

If I didn't think the machine would be to clingy I might consider it because of how nicely it asked.

firebirdx · 2012-10-15T20:26:58+00:00

Imagine being able to pay for stuff just by putting your penis in it. Want new shoes? Put your penis in them. A new book? Put your penis in it.

Wouldn't work for me, being a girl and all though.

faintpremonition · 2012-10-15T20:30:24+00:00

Instructions weren't clear, got... never mind.

barium111 · 2012-10-15T20:33:32+00:00

Then step aside noob.

Quilxe · 2012-10-15T20:47:24+00:00

Can't trust does machines.

letsgofree · 2012-10-15T20:53:13+00:00

Every little helps

Swirlyman · 2012-10-15T21:02:38+00:00

I laughed really hard at this, I am so immature.

cyryn · 2012-10-15T21:06:02+00:00

I wish girls said this to me.

XMBomb · 2012-10-15T21:06:27+00:00

family guy.

vodkacokebloke · 2012-10-15T21:40:04+00:00

are these the new six inches or less tills?

vodkacokebloke · 2012-10-15T21:41:05+00:00

'Please insert your PIN'

Scan, Fap, Pay.

ClockworkINTP · 2012-10-15T21:45:27+00:00

Well they call it a floppy drive for a reason

MyNameIsHax · 2012-10-15T21:56:46+00:00

bad shoop is bad

insert_funny · 2012-10-15T22:29:49+00:00

Would you rather it say "Feed Me A Stray Cat"?

SaintJimmy789 · 2012-10-15T22:30:17+00:00

Don't be a bitch, this looks legit.

Westlund · 2012-10-15T23:11:47+00:00

Bad Luck Brian would get "Denied" even by this

MC-Master-Bedroom · 2012-10-15T23:35:18+00:00

If I had a nickel for every time a machine asked me that ...

popepeterjames · 2012-10-15T23:56:48+00:00

But it said please!

thegoldenpotato · 2012-10-16T00:00:35+00:00

"Feed me a stray cat"

commandakeen · 2012-10-16T00:28:11+00:00

But always with protection, some computers may have viruses...

dacookeymonsta · 2012-10-16T00:42:50+00:00

Well, who am I to argue with an ATM?

Absurd_Leaf · 2012-10-16T00:49:49+00:00

The stupid thing is, if you actually tried to do what it told you, you'd probably get in a whole bunch of trouble. Ridiculous.

1261849 · 2012-10-16T00:58:12+00:00

even the robot cashiers are desperate

JTyler82 · 2012-10-16T00:58:24+00:00

Please buzz for assistance

SatanicEarmuff · 2012-10-16T01:03:28+00:00

If I had a nickel for every time I've been in a situation like that,..I'd have 3 cents

bitchplzzzz · 2012-10-16T01:55:01+00:00

Fine if you insist

asnof · 2012-10-16T02:21:12+00:00

With the way I fuck it had better pay for my groceries and give me a refund.......also it wouldnt fit

lumptoast · 2012-10-16T03:01:31+00:00

Speak for yourself.

wurtis16 · 2012-10-16T03:10:40+00:00

Oh! Well.. I guess that's okay.

Trololoo · 2012-10-16T03:29:43+00:00

That's what she said.

twoworldsin1 · 2012-10-16T04:05:44+00:00

Insert penis, money comes out...pimpin' ain't easy.

SixCentStripper · 2012-10-16T04:26:10+00:00

Well, it did say "please".

LeCrushinator · 2012-10-16T04:47:36+00:00

Femputer demands snoo-snoo!

notsurewhatiam · 2012-10-16T05:08:16+00:00

This is literally "/r/im14andthisisfunny"

EddieDIV · 2012-10-16T05:08:45+00:00

"Alright, but you're paying for this dinner."

McBurger · 2012-10-15T18:08:29+00:00

Anyone seeking more info might also check here:

title	comnts	points	age	/r/
A new way of paying at Tesco!	3^coms	18^pts	3^mos	funny
Well Tesco, if you insist...	119^coms	1491^pts	2^mos	WTF
I'm not sure what to do here...	4^coms	15^pts	6^mos	funny
If you insist...	96^coms	1290^pts	7^mos	WTF

source: karmadecay

GlennBass80 · 2012-10-15T16:00:12+00:00

New age Glory hole!

GagLV · 2012-10-15T18:34:58+00:00

Not sure from where it is, but knowing Americans, you could just do that and then sue the company for millions to get some free money.

bdepz · 2012-10-15T15:35:20+00:00

Like in your hand is any better?

rainmanj9 · 2012-10-15T16:48:58+00:00

Well if you're a prostitute that'd be a good way to pay for your groceries.

rubber_dinghy_rapids · 2012-10-15T17:00:04+00:00

Where would you put it? You could get your foreskin caught in the notes in slot. Ouch.

c_tsmith · 2012-10-15T17:04:14+00:00

just busted out laughing at work.

NorthStarTX · 2012-10-15T17:24:12+00:00

Feed me a live cat.

m1w1 · 2012-10-15T16:29:19+00:00

obvious reply

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