The giant poster of insults

freeze74 · 2012-10-09T15:14:27+00:00

Do you get one of these, free, with an Xbox live gold membership?

Beast2x · 2012-10-09T16:39:25+00:00

I'm in Hufflepuff? Them is fighting words.

donthugmeimscared · 2012-10-09T16:08:23+00:00

You're not very nice and I don't like you.

OtisTheZombie · 2012-10-09T14:03:44+00:00

I have to admit, I'll be using, "You're the AT&T of people," later today

DELTATKG · 2012-10-09T18:08:28+00:00

I took the time to type up all of them.

You look like your face was on fire and someone tried to put it out with a fork.
Fart smeller.
I can't tell if I'm talking to your face or your asshole.
dickweed
BUTTPIRATE
Douchenozzle
Bitch dick.
Jackass
Shut your cockholster
I think you'd be in hufflepuff
Dumbshit
Fudgepacker
Suck a bag of dicks
Before I met you I was pro-life
Wanker
Shitbag
mouthbreather
I hope something you love catches on fire
Pissant
If you die, I'm not going to your funeral
you look like a before picture.
turtle dick
If you were any less intelligent I would have to water you twice a week.
Your mother has two cunts and you're one of them.
Dumbass.
You're not very nice and I don't like you.
Shithead.
Son of a bitch
How appropriate, you fight like a cow.
Twat
Calling you stupid is an insult to stupid people.
Your mother fucks for bricks so she can build your sister a whore house
Fuckface
horsefucker
everyone who ever loved you was wrong.
ho bag
You are a sad, lonely little man, and you have my pity.
Why don't you go outside and play hide-and-go-fuck-yourself?
Clitsquiggle
Puff
Dickhead
Douche canoe
asshat
you're about as useful as anne frank's drum kit.
you have the most depressing smile
cocksucker
dipshit
pussy
your muff is cabbage
you sir, are unremarkable and unmemorable in every respect
Cum dumpter
Niggerfaggot
Ball licker
thundercunt
gaywad
You're not prettye enough to be this much of a bitch.
Skank
with a face like yours, I'd be very careful who and what I make fun of.
bastard
I hope you step on a lego
I would slap you, but I don't want to get slut on my hand.
Prick
The sound of your piss hitting the urinal is feminine
I had sex with your wife
turd sandwich
Jive turkey
Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.
I hope your asshole grows tastebuds.
Bitch, you dumb
you are the opposite of batman.
If your vagina had a password, it would be "password"
I'd call you a cunt, but you lack the warmth and the depth.
Fucktard
You're the AT&T of people
I worship the ground that awaits your grave.
History will judge me harshly for not having killed you.

Cellis_ · 2012-10-09T17:21:59+00:00

Favorite omitted insult: does you ass get jealous of how much shit comes out of your mouth?

deja-vu-comment · 2012-10-09T14:50:11+00:00

I can't be the only one who is going to make a concerted effort to get clitsquiggle into insult-circulation.

.

Brahndun · 2012-10-09T16:27:57+00:00

Shut your cockholster

Musth · 2012-10-09T17:56:28+00:00

Wasn't going to upvote until I saw "How appropriate, you fight like a cow." Ahhhhhhh, nostalgia.

For those unaware, it's from the timeless 90's game The Secret of Monkey Island

rushadee · 2012-10-09T16:47:07+00:00

The typography in this is lacking...

EyMAPNess · 2012-10-09T19:28:03+00:00

1) Glad to see that whoever made this watches Community. 2) Jive Turkey isn't an insult. 3) You forgot "cock-smuggler" - wherever you smuggle cock, it isn't good.

caffeineTX · 2012-10-09T19:41:08+00:00

"I hope you step on a Lego."

I wouldn't wish such a cruel punishment to my worst enemies.

poopsymk3 · 2012-10-09T16:24:49+00:00

The one that hurts the most is "I hope you step on a lego."

B01K17 · 2012-10-09T16:25:12+00:00

Where can I buy this?

ThatOneJawa · 2012-10-09T16:40:22+00:00

Two favourite insults aren't on here. Shit Rooster and Ass Taxi.

ColRockAmp · 2012-10-09T18:02:33+00:00

I don't see "Triple Hitler".

drunctioning_funk · 2012-10-09T18:06:20+00:00

"How appropriate, you fight like a cow" Monkey island?

MrIslander · 2012-10-09T16:29:06+00:00

This are all great, but I can't help but think I'll be getting a few odd looks when I break out "fucking homepage."

KShults · 2012-10-09T16:12:13+00:00

For added effect, combine the brusque yet pragmatic short insults with the long and eloquently expressed and in-depth insult, Example ; I can't tell if I'm talking to your face or your asshole, dickweed.

hiphophippopotamus · 2012-10-09T16:49:49+00:00

I've seen bigger.

gigglezandshitz · 2012-10-09T16:30:51+00:00

I think you'd be in hufflepuff hahahaha

moneymoneymoneymonay · 2012-10-09T17:07:41+00:00

It's You are a sad, STRANGE little man, and you have my pity. Not "lonely."

BreadstickNinja · 2012-10-09T17:16:10+00:00

Upvotes for the Monkey Island reference!

xB1akey · 2012-10-09T17:45:57+00:00

I hope your ass grows tastebuds OMG I laughed for 1 minute straight

flannell · 2012-10-09T17:21:44+00:00

Most of them are crap. Except this one..

"You're about as useful as anne frank's drum kit"

tomparker · 2012-10-09T17:15:03+00:00

Mathematics Field Guide Series: Table of the First 100 Numbers

FatMansPants · 2012-10-09T18:03:57+00:00

"Your mother fucks for bricks to build your sister a whorehouse." - Classic

lolliven · 2012-10-09T18:08:06+00:00

the hufflepuff comment hurt the worst

niccamarie · 2012-10-09T18:20:04+00:00

half of this is just vulgarity. i was hoping for more wit.

massafakka · 2012-10-09T18:21:03+00:00

I fart in your general direction!

potstuck · 2012-10-09T18:21:24+00:00

I hope your asshole grows taste buds

tiwuno · 2012-10-09T18:25:14+00:00

I see thundercunt, but no cock-juggling. This makes me sad.

maestro2005 · 2012-10-09T18:29:22+00:00

I hope you step on a lego

YOU TAKE THAT BACK

willowpje · 2012-10-09T18:29:43+00:00

I am rubber, you are glue.

iostat · 2012-10-09T18:30:09+00:00

"Mouthbreather" is an insult now?

ThatGuyAlxe · 2012-10-09T18:31:44+00:00

I'm going to keep this for....future use.

tardisrider613 · 2012-10-09T18:41:51+00:00

My favorite one isn't on there. It's "I hope you live a very, very long time."

MrFugums · 2012-10-09T18:49:35+00:00

"I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed man."

This is dripping with gentlemanly rage.

Eeku · 2012-10-09T18:59:04+00:00

"I think you'd be in hufflepuff" is pretty stealworthy.

Phoequinox · 2012-10-09T18:59:25+00:00

"I'd call you a cunt, but you lack the warmth and depth."

Ultimate breakup insult.

ArJooDeJew · 2012-10-09T19:00:49+00:00

Must I be the one to point out that this poster is lacking the king of insults?

"The Jerk Store called. They're running out of you."

Missmayo · 2012-10-09T19:02:56+00:00

"The sound of your piss hitting the urinal sounds feminine" is one of my favorite lines from The Other Guys..

Jonas223XC · 2012-10-09T19:20:28+00:00

"mouth breather" is a very underused insult. Shit's hilarious every time I hear it

AmateurChemistry · 2012-10-09T17:00:50+00:00

You're the AT&T of people was the first to stick out to me

fb95dd7063 · 2012-10-09T16:47:47+00:00

Absolute garbage typography.

ThisIsAntwon · 2012-10-09T16:59:17+00:00

Douche canoe.

EricT59 · 2012-10-09T16:43:30+00:00

Now someone needs to do this using Shakespeare Insults

Sylphetamine · 2012-10-09T17:26:47+00:00

No assbutt?

nategreen · 2012-10-09T17:46:41+00:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BlcqSsQfK68&feature=youtube_gdata_player

PeeGeeWuigi · 2012-10-09T17:52:43+00:00

I hope you step on a lego

TX_ambrosia · 2012-10-09T17:55:12+00:00

"your mom should have swallowed" is my favorite insult. If they're an only child, "Your mom should have swallowed you like she did your brothers and sisers"

the_orly_owl · 2012-10-09T17:55:36+00:00

Is there a larger version available?

Zantirs · 2012-10-09T17:56:15+00:00

My new phone wallpaper

jsnyderows · 2012-10-09T17:57:23+00:00

Hello new iPhone wallpaper

anuncommontruth · 2012-10-09T17:58:16+00:00

So now that this is posted, can we stop the continual Ask Reddit posts for the best fucking insult we know? There's like 6 a week at this point.

fmr1218 · 2012-10-09T17:59:27+00:00

Jive Turkey..

bumatlarge · 2012-10-09T18:01:58+00:00

Go step on a lego?! How could you wish that on anyone!

rytoof · 2012-10-09T18:04:15+00:00

"How appropriate, you fight like a cow!" Oh, really?

burf · 2012-10-09T18:07:09+00:00

I like "the sound of your piss hitting the urinal is feminine." It sounds very European to me; French, maybe.

Rayvina · 2012-10-09T18:09:45+00:00

The first one I saw was, " I hope you step on a Lego ",

BlazinGoliath · 2012-10-09T18:11:52+00:00

The only thing it's missing is "I hate you and all the bands you like."

chipsharp0 · 2012-10-09T18:18:07+00:00

Clitsquiggle...that one made me giggle.

Ederek_Cole · 2012-10-09T18:18:49+00:00

"I worship the ground that awaits your grave" is surprisingly classy.

Bigetto · 2012-10-09T18:18:52+00:00

I prefer to call it The Wall of Insults

Quazmoz · 2012-10-09T18:19:57+00:00

Go play in traffic

Chloeasha · 2012-10-09T18:23:31+00:00

I can't decide which one is my favorite!

RockFerrit · 2012-10-09T18:23:49+00:00

"I think you would atchieve higher in Hufflepuff" "Well fuck you too!"

IHaveHerpes · 2012-10-09T18:31:55+00:00

Your word... Is also niggerfaggot

npech001 · 2012-10-09T18:32:21+00:00

"I worship the ground that awaits your grave" is cold as ice.

johanlives · 2012-10-09T18:33:19+00:00

The internet has won again.

LukeTheSheep · 2012-10-09T18:35:02+00:00

And your word is. NIGGERFAGGOT.

krazykid586 · 2012-10-09T18:35:08+00:00

I don't like "niggerfaggot". I prefer "pineapple"

Vetalurg · 2012-10-09T18:35:32+00:00

Anyone else learned something new today?

tover · 2012-10-09T18:35:36+00:00

propofol · 2012-10-09T18:35:38+00:00

Can anyone find a website where this can be purchased?

pacman42 · 2012-10-09T18:39:38+00:00

I read like 3 of them and had to close the window because I'm about to laugh really loud at work.

Fuck, I have to close the comments now too.

Redire · 2012-10-09T18:39:55+00:00

Now we just need a complete list of retorts and then we are ready to defeat the Sword Master of of Melee Island^tm

Afiki · 2012-10-09T18:45:08+00:00

But Hufflepuffs are excellent finders...

MisSigsFan · 2012-10-09T18:46:31+00:00

But...what about chucklefuck?

IJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ · 2012-10-09T18:46:41+00:00

Thank you for not marking this NSWF. If you work somewhere that you would get in trouble for reading bad words....you're gonna have a bad fucking time.

The_Schield · 2012-10-09T18:47:29+00:00

fuckinghomepage.com makes me a better person every fucking day.

CouldBeATomato · 2012-10-09T18:51:16+00:00

A few of my favorite, from Monty Python - The Holy Grail.

Zanos · 2012-10-09T18:52:52+00:00

Shitlord?

Tebeku · 2012-10-09T18:59:46+00:00

I want this as a shirt.

jollyjake · 2012-10-09T19:00:35+00:00

As a person trapped in AT&T U-verse internet hell, you can guess what my favorite is...

me131211 · 2012-10-09T19:01:17+00:00

Whoever made this deserves an award. It is now my smart phone's wallpaper.

Schlorbian · 2012-10-09T19:05:46+00:00

They forgot "YOU NO BUSINESS BORN INSECURE RAT SOUP EATING MOTHER FUCKER."

cpf11 · 2012-10-09T19:06:19+00:00

where can i purchase this poster?

Qurayami · 2012-10-09T19:07:44+00:00

"I hope you step on a lego" That's some hardcore shit

qpple · 2012-10-09T19:07:53+00:00

I don't suppose anyone would have a larger version of this or know a place where to purchase one?

mantistoboggan222 · 2012-10-09T19:08:25+00:00

You are the AT&T of people. That one stings, especially if you actually use AT&T. Its like it works on two levels...

tblackwood · 2012-10-09T19:08:56+00:00

Relevant.

Eddh123 · 2012-10-09T19:09:02+00:00

CANT WE ALL JUST BE NICE ? :(

anotherbaldguy · 2012-10-09T19:12:48+00:00

vagina password > *

UnderwaterHandstand · 2012-10-09T19:14:19+00:00

This seems like something one would buy at Spencer's.

neverendingdrums · 2012-10-09T19:15:23+00:00

"How appropriate, you fight like a cow."

-Cue Monkey Island nostalgia-

tehxen · 2012-10-09T19:18:25+00:00

hey there are monkey island insults in there

sulusulu · 2012-10-09T19:18:56+00:00

<3 Monkey Island quote!!!! (How appropriate, you look like a cow!) but I would have preferred them to use Wally's "ya drink bilge water and yer mother dresses ya funny"

ninjakitty · 2012-10-09T19:19:24+00:00

The list is incomplete without "The Jerk store called. They are running out of you..."

InstantHandSanitizer · 2012-10-09T19:20:02+00:00

As someone who, until very recently, had a severely deviated septum, I always wondered when/where 'mouthbreather' became an insult. I always found it odd since the reason I had to breath through my mouth was simply because the inside of my nose grew into a weird shape.

Them: "You fucking mouthbreather!"

Me: "Yes, that's me. I have a deviated septum. If we had a flashlight I could show you."

Yea...

geaw · 2012-10-09T19:22:43+00:00

I am enough of those things that I almost have bingo.

luiz_elendil · 2012-10-09T19:24:58+00:00

What about "fuckass" and "go suck a fuck"?

CHR1STHAMMER · 2012-10-09T19:29:11+00:00

You're the AT&T of people... literally just fell out of my chair.

You_Dont_Party · 2012-10-09T19:29:23+00:00

Heh, I actually used the 'You're not pretty enough to be this much of a bitch' one once in a bar, and she did not take it well. However, the girls around her certainly liked it.

znera143 · 2012-10-09T19:31:11+00:00

where can i buy this?

RawPalmsMcGee · 2012-10-09T19:33:26+00:00

YOU FIGHT LIKE A DAIRY FARMER

snatch_rash_monkey · 2012-10-09T19:34:33+00:00

I am going to use every single one of these.

Squirrito · 2012-10-09T19:34:47+00:00

Gaywad! Awesome

RonaldFuckingPaul · 2012-10-09T19:34:55+00:00

they spelled "douchnozzle" wrong

scottBIGG · 2012-10-09T19:36:16+00:00

Hufflepuff...

gookies5 · 2012-10-09T19:38:53+00:00

Was awesome till I saw a Jersey Shore insult...

OwlsDiving · 2012-10-09T19:40:54+00:00

I went along laughing until I got to "You sir, are unremarkable and unmemorable in every respect." That was when I realized shit was real.

jarcoreta · 2012-10-09T19:41:34+00:00

How I can get this printed and sent to me with minnimum effort on my part?

PretendsToKnowThings · 2012-10-09T19:43:41+00:00

NOOOOO WHO TYPED UP ALL MY ORIGINAL INSULTS? THEY WERE MINE, I INVENTED THEM ALL. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE CLEVER IN FUNNY IN A SOCIAL SITUATION?

^dammit

deathbytray · 2012-10-09T19:46:53+00:00

You're not very nice and I don't like you.

You wound me. Deeply.

Linkzor24 · 2012-10-09T19:47:20+00:00

Douche nozzle. Never forget douche nozzle.

bntice · 2012-10-09T19:49:15+00:00

Am I the only one who thought the Hufflepuff comment was bay far the biggest burn?

Wetmelon · 2012-10-09T19:49:31+00:00

I have to say, "you're the AT&T of people" is probably the best.

ihateuall · 2012-10-09T19:50:08+00:00

Douche Canoe.

trampus1 · 2012-10-09T19:54:08+00:00

"Douche canoe"

I don't get this one. I also don't really like douche very much, a douche is a good thing.

LZero · 2012-10-09T19:55:58+00:00

The biggest insult here is the title font.

SomeRandomRedditer · 2012-10-09T19:56:29+00:00

Douche Canoe? I hope to hear this in general conversation soon.

fetchlycosfetch · 2012-10-09T19:58:44+00:00

Did not see "asshole"?

skippiesellers · 2012-10-09T19:58:46+00:00

In my head I hear all of these in Vince Vaughn's voice

Lividlavidaloca · 2012-10-09T19:59:09+00:00

"I hope you outlive your children" was strangely missing from this list.

Ninjatree · 2012-10-09T20:03:05+00:00

You are the AT&T of people? So fresh

njpasta · 2012-10-09T20:04:46+00:00

New life goal: Use one of these everyday for the rest of my life.

3dg3dg · 2012-10-09T20:06:11+00:00

I'd hate to meet the person that can find ways to use all of these quotes.

penlide · 2012-10-09T20:08:48+00:00

I must add thundercunt to my list. I'm not sure what context to use it in, though..

UndBeebs · 2012-10-09T20:10:48+00:00

"I hope you step on a Lego." That one was cold...

jeffreythomasc · 2012-10-09T20:12:27+00:00

never heard "clitsquiggle" before

vonkey · 2012-10-09T20:13:00+00:00

I like to imagine hufflepuff was the party section. Like the frat house oh HogWarts

lynny130 · 2012-10-09T20:17:51+00:00

My favorite is a tie between thundercunt and clitsquiggle

TheZeroEight · 2012-10-09T20:17:53+00:00

Man, I feel like I just listened to Platypus.

Dunskap · 2012-10-09T20:19:07+00:00

I'm going to take your mother out for a nice seafood dinner and never call her again

ch00d · 2012-10-09T20:22:21+00:00

I am now going to say "clitsquiggle" at least once a day.

RadiusOfTheFun · 2012-10-09T20:22:58+00:00

Why you little clit-squiggle. I love this.

kuatsimoto · 2012-10-09T20:25:08+00:00

Nice Monty reference there.

5n1p3rhaa · 2012-10-09T20:26:45+00:00

I hope you step on a lego, is my favorite!

mangarooboo · 2012-10-09T20:30:26+00:00

"Your mother fucks for bricks so she can build your sister a whore house" gave me heartburn. I'm not really sure why. I laughed and it suddenly felt like my esophagus was imploding.

That's what heartburn is, right guys...?

leinadogaitnas · 2012-10-09T20:31:48+00:00

Can I get this in desktop wallpaper form?

Ingey · 2012-10-09T20:33:55+00:00

"I hope you step on a lego", sheesh that's a bit uncalled for...

Tomus · 2012-10-09T20:34:25+00:00

Dick sniff is my favourite at the moment.

thatonerapist · 2012-10-09T20:38:29+00:00

"You're about as useful as Anne Franks drumset" So wrong...but so good..

jessmanyeah · 2012-10-09T20:43:03+00:00

I, hope you step on a lego.

uhmerikin · 2012-10-09T20:43:21+00:00

My wife called me a donkey once.

Took me a while to figure out she had called me an ass.

ipown11 · 2012-10-09T20:47:57+00:00

mhm mhm yep read it all. The only truly insulting ones involve no cursing, actually.

Arch_0 · 2012-10-09T20:47:58+00:00

I live in the UK. I posted this on my facebook wall. Expect to hear about me going to prison!

May2121 · 2012-10-09T20:49:24+00:00

You mouth breather!

aaaangiemarie · 2012-10-09T20:51:41+00:00

Must resist the urge to post to Facebook and tag everyone with the insult that fits them best

HereForTheBuffet · 2012-10-09T20:52:39+00:00

It ain't cool being no jive turkey so close to thanksgiving.

Phlexonance · 2012-10-09T20:56:20+00:00

How appropriate, you fight like a cow.

thanksfine · 2012-10-09T20:57:54+00:00

did a 14 year old make this?

Piano_Guy_Tries · 2012-10-09T20:58:31+00:00

I appreciate the Monty Python reference.

narwhalbakon · 2012-10-09T20:59:32+00:00

typical match of cod

klozn · 2012-10-09T21:07:32+00:00

"Your mother was a hamster and your father smells like elderberries" -> upvote!

Mr-Balisong · 2012-10-09T21:07:50+00:00

How to make tf2 sniper domination lines: Take that, you (insult goes here)

ike4077 · 2012-10-09T21:10:17+00:00

Are you fucking kidding me ,I posted this like two weeks ago and it gets down voted to fuck...

Chase_75 · 2012-10-09T21:12:11+00:00

Ages 12-16?

kolm · 2012-10-09T21:14:16+00:00

"How appropriate, you fight like a cow."

There are still people alive remembering this besides me?

startrekdentist · 2012-10-09T21:21:29+00:00

Giant poster of reposts FTFY

formerlylurkinlurker · 2012-10-09T21:31:12+00:00

I like "your mother fucks for bricks to build your sister a whore house." Win for me because I have two sisters, and one of them is a huge whore.

arghnard · 2012-10-09T21:34:02+00:00

I think I just shed a tear while reading these.

so...hurt..i am...

katanalauncher · 2012-10-09T21:41:20+00:00

Suck a Bag of Dicks

RainbowOcean · 2012-10-09T21:41:51+00:00

You are the opposite of Batman. Best on on there.

Arknell · 2012-10-09T21:45:25+00:00

If people had item-numbers, yours would be 1101-1816.

imapiratedammit · 2012-10-09T21:46:11+00:00

the internet could learn from this. theres so much more than "fag"

stonespiral · 2012-10-09T21:51:10+00:00

Upvote for Community reference.

kidred2001 · 2012-10-09T21:52:28+00:00

Clitsquiggle is my new favorite word

21785345 · 2012-10-09T21:56:03+00:00

'Clitsquiggle'... Really?

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