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Our place of devotion to the one true god, Nicolas Cage. His light guides us away from the temptation of John Travolta, and saves us from our bees.

His known prophets are Stephen King, who controls the mind, and M. Night Shyamalan, whose endings are always unforeseen. Follow their instructions, and you may achieve Mitt Romney, a state of eternal salvation and peace.

He is sworn enemies of Xenu and his minion Obama, and fights against the aliens with the help of the FSM, commander of pirates.

Praise Cage! May your Mountain Dew be sweet!

The words, teachings, and histories of the Cage are found in the Hat. Each chapter of this wondrous script is known as a Cat.

We do not wish to impose any earthly restrictions on His followers, but we would ask that reposts be kept to a minimum, and avoided if possible. Original content showing the glory of our Lord is greatly welcomed.

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all 70 comments

[–]vaJOHNna 141 points142 points ago

Our lord is a millionaire but still rides coach to interact with his people

[–]Scylla5[S] 65 points66 points ago

What a great guy

[–]ricklegend 46 points47 points ago

Our lord was really in coach? How did the flight staff not recognize his greatness and bump him up? infidels! At least it looks like they gave him all of the little liquor bottles in the beverage cart to ease his travels.

[–]wshs 10 points11 points ago

The bins shown are marked 1 & 2. Unless it's Southwest or Jetblue, that's first class. That means he chose to bless the lady not only with his presence, but first class. She's a chosen one!

[–]ricklegend 1 point2 points ago

I have the distinct feeling op is not in the picture. He is a false prophet.

[–]wshs 0 points1 point ago

It's definitely not op.

[–]Roxxer 14 points15 points ago

His modesty is an example that we should all follow.

[–]akr8683 5 points6 points ago

my guess is that he got kicked out of first class

[–]durgem 0 points1 point ago

he is not a millionaire anymore. he got nailed in a ponzie scheme. johnny depp loaned him money because he was broke. not sure on the particulars. google it, im working god damn it.

[–]PureClass 0 points1 point ago

Our lord needs to buy both houses and castles, like in europe, to sastisfy his home addiction, nothing wrong with that. The more properties he buys, the more movies he ends up making.

[–]OcifferWiggles 0 points1 point ago

Doesn't he owe a shit-tonne of money via taxes? That was my first thought when I noticed he was in coach.

[–]Old_Scratch1 25 points26 points ago

How glorious of him, to appear unkempt and to ride coach just to make us closer to him.

[–]Roxxer 11 points12 points ago

He must stay unkempt in front of his people or else the mortals would be unable to control their lust for him.

[–]Old_Scratch1 9 points10 points ago

It's a good thing he was on the plane this time, remember in Knowing (based off true events) where they saw him and decided that seeing him was the high point of their lives, so they crashed?

[–]Homer69 5 points6 points ago

He has always been in debt I honestly don't think he has much money. I could be wrong

[–]Old_Scratch1 12 points13 points ago

No. He chooses to be in debt. He decided He was on a high enough pedestal so He started cooking the books to put Himself in the red.

[–]daybreaker 0 points1 point ago

It's like that song says, "What if God was one of us, just a slob like like one of us, just a stranger on the bus, trying to make his way home"

I like to think she was singing about our Lord Nic

[–]beaglemaster 25 points26 points ago

i just realized something! Assuming that this picture really was taken about 5 days ago our Lord has amazing beard growing powers

[–]Scylla5[S] 17 points18 points ago

Holy shit! Maybe if I touch him, he will heal my naked chin.

[–]Abezilla116 29 points30 points ago

YOU MUST NOT TOUCH OUR LORD AND SAVIOR, FOR YOU ARE NOT WORTHY.

[–]Scylla5[S] 13 points14 points ago

AHHH FORGIVE ME. I have sinned.

[–]Abezilla116 9 points10 points ago

The only punishment adequate for this sort of sin is death. Death by stoning.

[–]miserlou 20 points21 points ago

*bees. Death by bees.

[–]daybreaker 8 points9 points ago

NOT THE BEES

[–]GhettoKid 2 points3 points ago

[11]

[–]Roxxer 6 points7 points ago

He is so pure that touching him will burn your hands.

[–]FartyNapkins 0 points1 point ago

Lord Nicolas of the family Cage, Nephew of Francis the Ford Coppola, has blessed himself with the gift of beard. All ye whom shall follow his teachings and ye that have faith in the almighty Nicolas shall also be blessed with the gift of beard and a place shall be made at his side in the Kingdom of Heaven.

[–]Deradius 24 points25 points ago

Hey, OP, if that's you in the photo....

Did he seem ok?

Recent photos of him are disturbing.

Did he seems like he was doing fine, and just annoyed at the photo?

Or did he smell like alcohol and seem kind of out of it?

What was his demeanor, generally speaking?

I have no idea what I'm going to do with the information either way, but I'm actually a little concerned about him.

[–]RachnusRageous 11 points12 points ago

What if god was one of us? Just a slob like one of us?

[–]knifeinabox 0 points1 point ago

WHAT IS THIS BLASPHEMY? HOW DARE YOU QUESTION HIM!

[–]RachnusRageous 3 points4 points ago

I SHALL PURGE MY SINS THROUGH THE ACT OF SELF IMMOLATION.

[–]NavesRegge 3 points4 points ago

You and me both. I've yet to see a picture of him with a fan in which he doesn't look like he has twenty hangovers.

[–]foxxygrandpa 0 points1 point ago

Ditto.

[–]hpclone25 66 points67 points ago

Dude he looks either pissed or like shit everytime someone takes a picture with him. Does this mean if he smiles in a picture with a with a fan that they are specific chosen apostles.

[–]curf 11 points12 points ago

They are the true believers. We should follow their examples

[–]moose_man 0 points1 point ago

The Prophets of Cage

[–]Engineerthegreat 1 point2 points ago

Now my life goal is to get a good pic with him. Thanks for that didn't have any other plans or anything...

[–]LlammaPandaCat 16 points17 points ago

People need to stop forcing the one true lord to take photos, it displeases him greatly.

[–]beefanator0 16 points17 points ago

Dat Beard

[–]Kash87 0 points1 point ago

As only a true savior would brandish

[–]slomas 20 points21 points ago

Nick Cage and Gene Hackman, who'd have thought it

[–]HoHoNOPE 32 points33 points ago

He is Lord.

[–]Scylla5[S] 19 points20 points ago

ALL GLORY TO HIM

[–]KabanaBoy 2 points3 points ago

Lord, is he

[–]ClearlySituational 43 points44 points ago

is it just me or does he just look shittier and shittier every time he's seen in the wild?

[–]Scylla5[S] 57 points58 points ago

I hope you're not disrespecting my Lord and Savior right now.

[–]ClearlySituational 24 points25 points ago

No,no.. of course not.

[–]Scylla5[S] 14 points15 points ago

Phew.

[–]Word_Inventor 0 points1 point ago

Jealous, obviously.

[–]BuddyBatman 5 points6 points ago

I could die happy knowing I sat next to the great Cage on a plane trip. Though it really does look like he's been recently method acting for Leaving Las Vegas.

[–]consumeradvocacy 5 points6 points ago

I think it's about time to declare that our savior has a drug addiction, therefore we all should too.

[–]Netegexi 4 points5 points ago

Using "Knowing" as Scripture (it's canon, right?), there is evidence that in the event of a plane crash, our Lord will respond swiftly, and that the exact time and place of such catastrophes are also known by Him.

[–]lilmissy91 6 points7 points ago

Our lord flying coach?

[–]MrRushing 4 points5 points ago

I swear, reddit is single handedly documenting this mans demise. All hail the One True God.

[–]tooArgentinian 2 points3 points ago

Our lord has long hair now? Who's the sleepy dude next to him?

[–]Krzys_CCE 0 points1 point ago

LEAVE NICK CAGE ALONE!!!

Lol

[–]The_Soul_King_Pirate 0 points1 point ago

Nice try Nick Cage.

[–]beaglemaster 1 point2 points ago

I don't about you people, but i dig the beard

[–]Lulzorr 1 point2 points ago

He honestly looks like "please leave me alone."

[–]IHv2RtrnSumVdeotapes 2 points3 points ago

i am officially concerned for him.

[–]ItsOnlyKetchup 1 point2 points ago

This was posted to 3 different subreddits? Christ...

[–]giambifan 0 points1 point ago

I was concerned after Stolen only made a handful of change.

[–]Word_Inventor 0 points1 point ago

That sultry come-hither look of his does it for me every time.

[–]iFartSunshine 1 point2 points ago

I think it's time to leave this guy alone.

[–]Jakesaltz 0 points1 point ago

He may be dying...

[–]FartyNapkins 0 points1 point ago

All hail Nicolas of the family Cage

[–]Cappinponcho 0 points1 point ago

The reason he looks so drunk, is because he's riding in coach.

[–]SpockAndRoll 0 points1 point ago

I find it ironic that the title says he's looking great as ever. He looks like shit.

[–]FuTRoN -3 points-2 points ago

he looks like shit to be honest