This DOES present a conundrum, I will allow. 'Tis indubitably scurrilous and uncouth to submerge one's person in the lake, if for no other reason than that the wretched undertaker must later prepare a sodden and reeking body for funereal services. A gentleman's dignity suffers much when he behaves in a manner which needlessly causes suffering to the classes unfortunate enough to require professional employment in order to finance their subsistence. Nevertheless, I cannot argue that it it impossible to visit this great shame upon your honor following your departure from the earthly realm.

I must, then, appeal to your belief in a world beyond this one. You have referred to the "next world." Is it earnestly your belief that this next world will be absent any theory of moral behavior? If so, I shudder to think at the company you shall enjoy there! Louts and ruffians, allowed to commit unchecked mischief? Heaven forfend! If, upon the hand opposite, you do believe that a certain ethical standard must be met in order to enter into the ideal next world, then I suggest that you await the Creator's judgment upon when your breath should cease to issue from your lungs. Taking this decision upon yourself would surely serve to offend and reduce the likelihood that the Creator may nominate you to his heavenly club.