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top 200 commentsshow all 280

[–]Necromisfit 191 points192 points ago

Brb pmc.

[–]killer-fel[S] 73 points74 points ago

Ok, after LKAB

[–]Zoids 71 points72 points ago

Then, OMGB? Anyone?

[–]ScratchBomb 50 points51 points ago

I'm down. But NMH.

[–]SonofSin17 30 points31 points ago

just come to my house my PSMD

[–]yaoski 23 points24 points ago

After we have a SBBQ

[–]Always_smooth 16 points17 points ago

Sorry I can't make it guys DLOD.

[–]dreweatall 12 points13 points ago

MHIO so I'm DLOD

[–]adam_anarchist 14 points15 points ago

after that some PTSD

[–]MajorButtface 11 points12 points ago

Got me. I checked back at the pic to see which one this was.

[–]mcawkward 14 points15 points ago

Nah, IMDB

[–]Skaarah 21 points22 points ago

Im Making Dildo Bread?

[–]JurassicParkerr 3 points4 points ago

I murdered dumpster baby.

[–]SirTheBob 13 points14 points ago

MHIO!!

[–]blueche 12 points13 points ago

"There's nothing worse than a surprise lemon party"

--Liz Lemon on 30 Rock

[–]pime 10 points11 points ago

It wouldn't be a Lemon party without old Dick.

[–]mb9023 4 points5 points ago

I feel like this should stand for "Oh my God, Becky.."

[–]blahzan 1 point2 points ago

OMGB, LAHB!

[–]Metatron_1 13 points14 points ago

Anyone up for some SBBQ!

[–]HisHighNes 6 points7 points ago

I'll bring the sauce

[–]johnly13 7 points8 points ago

I prefer Butter's Creamy Goo.

[–]Zoids 1 point2 points ago

What about Clue Goo?

[–]wiithepiiple 2 points3 points ago

I don't know what "Brb" stands for. Could you elaborate?

[–]aliciamestre 7 points8 points ago

my best theory is "Brothers Raping Bitches". Don't teens always travel in packs?

[–]Dujen 1 point2 points ago

How would one go about pmc? Your response must not be in the form of a picture.

[–]Skaarah 6 points7 points ago

Lots of anal fisting.

[–]Thomsenite 450 points451 points ago

From The Onion...

[–]SanchoDeLaRuse 185 points186 points ago

Why do you have to ruin our fun with facts?

[–]mackinoncougars 128 points129 points ago

Because he's a dad. PSMD

[–]SanchoDeLaRuse 44 points45 points ago

Oh well, let's DLOD, then LKAB.

[–]luvs_T0_spooge 13 points14 points ago

I'm down I NMH anyways. Just gotta finish up my SBBQ. Should be done in 20 min or so

[–]waleedwale1 11 points12 points ago

I gotta pmc then go to a sbbq

[–]jzerocoolj 6 points7 points ago

You could probably kill two birds with one stone and just do the former while attending the latter.

[–]BeachNWhale 1 point2 points ago

MHIO ;)

[–]crappytheseal 16 points17 points ago

ocupado

[–]LeSpatula 6 points7 points ago

I think this was pretty oblivious. Even living in a country where you can't buy The Onion, my first thought was: "From The Onion!"

[–]SanchoDeLaRuse 2 points3 points ago

I'm subscribed to /r/nottheonion , so I don't even know anymore...

The world has turned into one giant Poe's law on me.

[–]Valadar917 10 points11 points ago

I was partially worried that this was serious. Thanks.

I mean, some people could be dumb enough to take this seriously. Maybe your children are killing bums by the dozens. It's a likely scenario because the media said so.

[–]frozentrually 2 points3 points ago

Although this is from The Onion, there are some websites that have ridiculous acronyms that they think teenagers use. Not this ridiculous but kind of close. For example... www.teenchatdecoder.com/parental-lookup/teenchat-a.html

[–]CorraTerria 2 points3 points ago

Did they seriously use AWOL as text lingo?

[–]AOEUD 4 points5 points ago

Aw, dang.

[–]laid-to-waste 4 points5 points ago

am i the only person that was relieved when they read this?

[–]pozole_supreme 2 points3 points ago

* Dick

[–]ToFoolThemIn 0 points1 point ago

Heh and I was just about to ask what a sex BBQ was...

[–]LightingEnvirons 17 points18 points ago

Up next, a redditor misses the point.

[–]deja-vu-comment 81 points82 points ago

I kinda want to know what a sex barbecue is. Do you have sex with the food or do you have sex while making the food?

.

[–]xRobbStarkx 112 points113 points ago

If you have to ask you probably can't afford it

[–]Sharp398 14 points15 points ago

I got four dollars...

[–]samman445 19 points20 points ago

You can watch for a little bit, but you can only have one hot dog.

[–]nightmare434 9 points10 points ago

"hot dog"

[–]samman445 8 points9 points ago

"bratwurst" if you're lucky

[–]SadisticCornflakes 3 points4 points ago

"blood sausage" ಠ_ಠ

[–]ridethepig360 2 points3 points ago

Hope everyone is clean... we wouldn't want any "black pudding."

[–]JeffieSnugglebottom 0 points1 point ago

If you're there, it'll probably be red.

[–]Nashoo 3 points4 points ago

Not condemning you but it seems like nobody notices you just reposted some guys comment ?

[–]Haplo90 7 points8 points ago

It's a bot. It automatically reposts the top comment from the original post. If you click on the period underneath it's sentence it takes you to the original post.

[–]JesusChristophe 3 points4 points ago

Gangbang followed by cannibalism... Delicious Sweet Baby Ray's Cannibalism.

[–]Phuck_Nugget 2 points3 points ago

Jesus, Christophe!

[–]Fahull 2 points3 points ago

just think barbecue sauce and pork chops.

[–]AOEUD 5 points6 points ago

I think it's just a barbecue (the event) crossed with an orgy.

[–]you_rock_rock -1 points0 points ago

Apparently you've never heard of steak and BJ day. The most glorious of holidays.

[–]strogginoff 1 point2 points ago

Start with "Hot Chick Stoner BBQ"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d57oFFVetWc

[–]PhylisInTheHood 0 points1 point ago

if you have to ask, you'll never know

                               -Angelica

[–]yerm620 31 points32 points ago

I'm 20 now, but when I was in high school my mom used to watch 60 minutes and come ask me ridiculous ass questions based off of what she saw. I swear the media makes this shit up to freak parents out.

[–]Alex7302 20 points21 points ago

If it gets ratings they'll shoot cats with crossbows! too soon?

[–]FuckAllTheHaters 2 points3 points ago

No cause that wasn't the first cat to get shot with a cross bow.

[–]bbctol 6 points7 points ago

They call it... souping.

[–]right_in_two 2 points3 points ago

Oh man, I am cheesing my balls off right now.

[–]therascalking13 7 points8 points ago

They call it cheesing because it's FON to DUE.

[–]LiteweightPhenomenal 1 point2 points ago

They just did their bi-yearly alcohol scare piece where they talk about people doing shit that literally nobody does unless they're some moron who heard about it from 20/20.

ABC news piece talking about the 20/20 piece - (nevermind the fact that the kid in the article who bought alcohol on eBay isn't old enough to have a credit card)

1 week later........

[–]PunkyBruiser 3 points4 points ago

You were probably using Lunix to hack! I read those articles I know the signs

[–]kalleguld 0 points1 point ago

Those things were all true, we were just keeping you out of the loop so you wouldn't tell

[–]phi1sebben 0 points1 point ago

When I was in high school, our school was on the news for alleged "sex parties," where the students were getting together and exchanging sex for drugs. No one could ever figure it out because the school was so small there's no way this was a "thing" without anyone actually knowing about it...

Paranoid parents can make something out of nothing. This wouldn't surprise me if it were true.

[–]alomjahajmola 39 points40 points ago

Anyone seeking more info might also check here:

title comnts points age /r/
Wtf really. Parents these days are really gullible. 15coms 23pts 1dy WTF
Who Uses These? 8coms 7pts 1mo WTF
It was only a matter of time... 15hrs funny
"Let's kill a bum." 15coms 31pts 2mos funny
What all of the kids are saying these days.. 401coms 1196pts 3mos funny

source: karmadecay

[–]sgtpepper_spray 12 points13 points ago

15 hours ago in this same sub? OP is a scumbag

[–]SHEET_ON_MY_BED 6 points7 points ago

So I was DLOD at a SBBQ the other day, and I realized that I NMH so I said to my friends "LKAB and take his!". We passed by an OMGB on the way there, and at first this dude was all like "MHIO" but after they started he was all "Ouch, you're PMC!"....my PSMD.

[–]gormap18 8 points9 points ago

Sorry to inform you, but this is definitely a repost.

[–]gormap18 5 points6 points ago

Here's the post that got the most upvotes (according to karmadecay).

[–]hahavaffan 13 points14 points ago

MHIO sounds like something a person from Hawaii would greet friends with.

[–]PoisonSnow 7 points8 points ago

Hello my friends! My hole is open.

[–]nelson900 3 points4 points ago

I lost it at prolapsing my colon. Because. I mean. C'mon.

[–]KrystianaBanana 7 points8 points ago

sex barbecue.....intriguing...

[–]BornInReddit 6 points7 points ago

Boss? What? It's a repost. It sure is Johnny. What do we d- we downvote, We downvote son.

[–]lars2020 4 points5 points ago

this is great, i was so sick of typing out "Let's Kill A Bum"

[–]strychnine 2 points3 points ago

Us?

Wait, are teenagers really the primary demographic of reddit now?

What the fuck happened?

[–]AlmoschFamous 0 points1 point ago

*dick

That is the best part.

[–]Hjallgrimm 2 points3 points ago

Drew Toothpaste

[–]themauwinator 1 point2 points ago

What are you, 12?

[–]el_bhm 1 point2 points ago

BOTDD - beating off to a dead dog

EDDBRB - Eating doody dad brb

BBBBBBB - bitch bitch bitch big bitch bitch big

FLKAQPREE - Fakhir looping kettle around Queency pushed realtive entry earm

Forward me a google to my internet IGASAP with more!

[–]brassninja 2 points3 points ago

Sex barbecue sounds awesome.

[–]MMolter 1 point2 points ago

Me thinks the writer of this is a troll. Still, brilliant though.

[–]antmansbigxmas 4 points5 points ago

It's from The Onion.

[–]CpnKangaroo 1 point2 points ago

They forgot the overused, LFOTCOHPAWSUAFOH

"Let's fuck on the corpses of homeless people after we shoot up a fuckload of heroin"

[–]TAC0001 3 points4 points ago

Don't forget about IKAHWDID... I killed a hooker what do I do?

[–]Panda_Undies -1 points0 points ago

I certainly hope that these people are not "getting ON to me" any time soon.

[–]Bigbadd3 -1 points0 points ago

I remember seeing something like this in an airplane magazine.

[–]nelson_flaggela -1 points0 points ago

I prefer "ROFL": Ripping open female labia

[–]antmansbigxmas -1 points0 points ago

SBBQ, LKAB, and MHIO are my favorite ones.

[–]Soukai -1 points0 points ago

IRHIDGBWMP, IAOP

[–]stepsxahead -1 points0 points ago

If i had a nickel for every time was in a SBBQ...

[–]starguy13 5 points6 points ago

you would be broke...

[–]Splinter1010 -1 points0 points ago

Do any of those mean anything?

[–]LimitedKnight -1 points0 points ago

NMH, BRB

[–]starguy13 -1 points0 points ago

sbbq= sweet barbecue sbbq= sweaty bouncing ball quarter sbbq= sexy big butts quality lkab= lord knows about babies mhio= mondays have it open omgb= oh my god barack psmd= Primary Scleroderma Myocardial Disease lkab= Luossavaara-Kiirunavaara Aktiebolag pmc= Pokémon Mystery Club nmh= Nodding My Head

[–]retroclarinet -1 points0 points ago

LKAB during a SBBQ? Let's make it happen.

[–]loveandbaseketball -1 points0 points ago

Well now I just want some sexy barbecue

[–]what_is_rife -1 points0 points ago

MHIO, LKAB.

[–]lalorcd -1 points0 points ago

Oh god, dont let fox get ahold of this

[–]specialkink -1 points0 points ago

You keep using that lingo. I do not think it means what you think it means.

[–]CantDeside -1 points0 points ago

Isn't it just "They're onto us!"?

[–]Greflin 0 points1 point ago

Sex BBQ is something that Douglass Reynholm would suggest for a company outing.

[–]sleepfighter7 0 points1 point ago

I don't care how many times i seen it, this still cracks me up

[–]mygreendot 0 points1 point ago

commenting so i can come back to this later

[–]Ty2zoom -1 points0 points ago

Artical written by 4chan That explains it

[–]Catvoca 0 points1 point ago

This post NMH

[–]ManateeKing 0 points1 point ago

What's the problem, I use every one of those at least once a day... hold up, just PMC real quick

[–]dhssoccer13 0 points1 point ago

I haven't had a sex BBQ in years

[–]beekeeperbeard 0 points1 point ago

I find my old man gangbangs and bum killings go together pretty well.

[–]Frat_Panda 0 points1 point ago

What perchance is a sex barbecue and why haven't I been invited to one!

[–]slevadon 0 points1 point ago

I wonder how many times this can be re-shopped

[–]h2sbacteria 0 points1 point ago

BRBGB

[–]AustinTreeLover 0 points1 point ago

I don't know about you guys, but I'm down with a sex BBQ.

[–]DarwinismObvious 0 points1 point ago

Theres a star next to D*, and at the bottom they put in little letters *Dick

[–]Simple_avacado 0 points1 point ago

Not going to give things away, but lets just say im having a SBBQ at my place tonight.

[–]whollaspark 0 points1 point ago

I've only used three of them. :/

[–]Clowens 0 points1 point ago

i had a SBBQ last week, Sweet baby Rays everywhere.

[–]black27696 0 points1 point ago

[–]gooruman -1 points0 points ago

[–]angrystarfish 0 points1 point ago

OMGB SBBQ

[–]Keyserchief 0 points1 point ago

[–]Laugh_At_Everything 0 points1 point ago

Damnit! Now I have to find another way to let my friends know that my hole is open....

[–]dckunited 0 points1 point ago

one of the few things on this sub that actually made me audibly laugh

[–]panaz 0 points1 point ago

Prolapsing my colon got me to literally lol

[–]Epix115 0 points1 point ago

I lost it at LKAB

[–]bgb111 0 points1 point ago

Good lord...

[–]blasianite 0 points1 point ago

This is a repost from a whole ago

[–]Who_flung_poo69 1 point2 points ago

They forgot TIAR. This Is A Repost.

[–]darkarchonlord 0 points1 point ago

Us, teens, sigh.

[–]Dr_Medic345 0 points1 point ago

...What?

[–]dreweatall 0 points1 point ago

Why the fuck did no one tell me I could shorten "Sex Bbq"?

[–]HawkFood 0 points1 point ago

"u up 4 a OMGB aftr the SBBQ?"

"sure MHIO"

[–]N-Adenhart34 0 points1 point ago

I've never even heard of those.

[–]urukhai434 0 points1 point ago

sorry mom, not today. I'm prolapsing my colon

[–]Verbose_Slayer 0 points1 point ago

LKAB I NMH!

[–]keith_weaver 0 points1 point ago

MMmmmmm, sex bar-b-que.

[–]qmanoulton 0 points1 point ago

R r r repost

[–]LeSpatula 0 points1 point ago

MFWMHIO 8-|

[–]juliantheguy 0 points1 point ago

omg wtf.

[–]poonjam 0 points1 point ago

*Dick lol

[–]NueDumaz 1 point2 points ago

Are you kidding?
I say that stuff every day.
I had no idea there were all these neat abbreviations this whole time.......

[–]Viperbunny 1 point2 points ago

I worry that one day my daughter will know way more about the technology of her day (especially if she takes after her dad). I couldn't help laughing so hard at this. Yes, kids do stupid shit, but this has to be one of the most ridiculous things I have seen. I truly hope by the time she is a teenagers I will not be so out of touch I could believe such a thing (even though I am sure this is a gag, I know these kind of parents).

[–]BBSLICK 0 points1 point ago

Saw yesterday...

[–]willpump4gas 0 points1 point ago

DLOD! LOL MHIO!

[–]animaniac1126 0 points1 point ago

damn it i use those slangs everyday now i need new ones like fhp- fucking homeless people

[–]Lying_Cake 0 points1 point ago

I feel like a teenager told them this to throw them off.

[–]Pets1989 0 points1 point ago

Repost ahoy ! PS : go fuck yourself

[–]stfumikep 0 points1 point ago

this is an adorable little repost you have here.

[–]gravitary 0 points1 point ago

"old man gangbang" - said no one ever

[–]iRSoap 0 points1 point ago

FYI MHIO

[–]latortillablanca 0 points1 point ago

"Prolapsing my colon" is my #1 excuse for getting out of shopping trips...

[–]Sadmushroom 0 points1 point ago

I'd love som SBBQ, sounds great!

[–]stargazer13 0 points1 point ago

SBBQ 2nte!

[–]ragemo 0 points1 point ago

BRB NMH 4 DLOD @ OMGBSBBQ

[–]Lenourous 0 points1 point ago

hahahah, this shieeet, is so fucking funny... all i can say

[–]Whatthefuckamisaying 0 points1 point ago

TIAR

[–]jewishest 0 points1 point ago

PMC?! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[–]orbital667 0 points1 point ago

My entire life, 32 years and I've never been to a sex bbq. =\

[–]katacarbix 0 points1 point ago

This is almost as bad as ChristWire

[–]DreamoftheEndless 0 points1 point ago

LKAB

[–]iamthetribute 1 point2 points ago

At a sex barbecue do you have sex with the food or sex while making the food?

[–]Ga-Stoned_Again 0 points1 point ago

I NMH so LKAB before the SBBQ cause we'll be DLOD

[–]TrolledByDestiny 0 points1 point ago

LOL need more heroin

[–]Jinqs 0 points1 point ago

The title of this post is so aggravating...

[–]poleethman 0 points1 point ago

jeomk

[–]zackafshar 0 points1 point ago

OP is a fag.

[–]missallsunday88 0 points1 point ago

I know this is a repost but have an upvote anyway because its still funny.

[–]Al_Rashid 0 points1 point ago

*dick

[–]fancynickolas 0 points1 point ago

Haha lets kill a bum

[–]lcg3000 0 points1 point ago

Insert useless getting into title. Reap sweet karma.

[–]Rugl 0 points1 point ago

OMGB at the Lemonparty

[–]M7600 1 point2 points ago

My hole is always open.

[–]technotoad 0 points1 point ago

awesome

[–]snakeysnake0 0 points1 point ago

I wonder if these are also popular hashtags?

[–]SystematicDemon 0 points1 point ago

Dat shit b fo' rizzle? Dayum day b on2 us lyk reel tingz!

[–]Vacster 0 points1 point ago

Yeah... Adults totally understand teenagers <_<

[–]Wellfuthen 0 points1 point ago

I remember seeing this one a long time ago. Its still hilarious. I just dont know if the person that wrote it was serious or what. #LKAB

[–]sadsafariman 0 points1 point ago

This makes me wonder if people actually use these "text codes"

[–]danieloo1 0 points1 point ago

damn they caught me

[–]JoshTay 0 points1 point ago

Sent this to a friend with a teenage daughter. His response:

What?! And all this time I thought she was telling me: Doing Lord's Ordained Duties Southern BBQ OMG Bunnies! Parents Should Make Decisions Near My Heart Pledging More Charity Little Kittens Are Bashful More Homework Is OK!  

[–]Montezuma_Forgives 1 point2 points ago

PMC lol

[–]BabyCak3z 0 points1 point ago

What... Tha... Fuck....

[–]explicitturtles 0 points1 point ago

My parents caught me texting OMGB. i cant visit my grandpa anymore

[–]cyates00 0 points1 point ago

Honestly, who types in sex barbecue?

[–]ikinone 0 points1 point ago

"getting on to us" sounds literal, and wrong

Better to say: "catching on to us", as "they're on to us is derived from: "catch on".

[–]ihateafg 0 points1 point ago

Dear God, either Im really getting old and this is accurate, or media scare tactic propaganda is getting more and more outlandish.

[–]BaadKitteh 0 points1 point ago

If I am ever in a PTA meeting and someone brings some shit like this up I am going to crack up laughing, fall out of my crappy folding chair, and get banned from the PTA. =/

[–]hamandjam 0 points1 point ago

JAFR -Just another fucking repost

[–]drwhofan1985 0 points1 point ago

Yet another made up list of "txt lingo".