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1232
1233

Mila Kunis named Esquire’s sexiest woman alive (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by El_Rey_de_Reyes

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[–]i_attend_goat_orgies 98 points99 points ago

GOD DAMN IT MEG

[–]Im-M-A-Reyes 43 points44 points ago

I prefer calling her "Jackie"

[–]Quizzical_Optimist 7 points8 points ago

Read this like uncle on Jackie Chan Adventures.

[–]SuspiciouslyFast 4 points5 points ago

I miss that show so much.

[–]TrueMilli 318 points319 points ago

Yeah, she's hot. But "sexiest woman alive?" that's ridiculous.

[–]skankedout 167 points168 points ago

The whole idea of a sexiest woman living is ridiculous. It's way too subjective, anyway.

[–]Robert_Cannelin 27 points28 points ago

Skankedout likes the dead ones!

[–]Sprocketlord 4 points5 points ago

Audrey Hepburn, hells yeah!

[–]hillary0813 2 points3 points ago

Yeah I feel like the title "sexiest woman alive" also implies that there is a "sexiest woman dead"... Or perhaps zombie/undead. Whatever you want the opposite of alive to be

load more comments (2 replies)

    [–]goo321 2 points3 points ago

    I have a scientific system if you're interested.

    [–]Picklwarrior 5 points6 points ago

    I made a calculator program - the H.D.O.F.R.S.

    High-Definition Objective Female Rating System

    According to it, yes Mila Kunis is the sexiest woman alive.

    And yes I made a calculator program to objectify women.

    [–]T0PHER911 1 point2 points ago

    We won't judge.

    [–]Gauntlet 1 point2 points ago

    Yes we will. But not unfavourably.

    [–]we_love_dassie 0 points1 point ago

    Not only subjective but completely disregards the thousands of beautiful and only mildly decomposed corpses.

    [–]Thumperings 0 points1 point ago

    It has always meant "sexiest famous person alive" that we can make money from.

    [–]ibechainsawin 3 points4 points ago

    I feel like no one took her voice into account when making that decision.

    [–]supernormal 0 points1 point ago

    hahaha

    [–]SpelingTroll 4 points5 points ago

    "alive". 0/10 would not bang.

    [–]MagicTarPitRide 4 points5 points ago

    It means her publicist is doing a good job. That is all it means.

    [–]TJ_McWeaksauce 6 points7 points ago

    My first inclination was to agree with you. But then I paused to review some known facts:

    • She's known to play video games.
    • She's got a background in comedic acting, which means she likely has a good sense of humor.
    • She's been known to have poor taste in men. She dated Macaulay Culkin for a while, right?

    I am not no longer so sure she doesn't deserve the title of "Esquire's Sexiest Woman Alive," which is a dubious title at best.

    [–]SmartAssX 3 points4 points ago

    Scarlett johansson wins easy compared to her

    [–]NichaelBluth 1 point2 points ago

    Especially since they bestowed Rihanna with the same title last year, so, I guess Rihanna is dead now?

    [–]OlePuddinHead -2 points-1 points ago

    Couldnt have said it any better. Actually the girl who is on Modern Family is younger and hotter. She looks like her younger sister.

    [–]lavaeolus 1 point2 points ago

    /r/SarahHyland :-)

    [–]OlePuddinHead 2 points3 points ago

    dayum. popular girl.

    [–]i_have_boobies -1 points0 points ago

    Younger? What does that have to do with anything? She's nowhere close to "old", so to be pointing out that someone else is younger, and using it as a staple in an argument about who is hotter, I am under the impression that you are either a teenager or a pedophile.

    [–]TrueMilli 1 point2 points ago

    To me it reads like he meant "younger" in a descriptive, not a comparative way. How else is he gonna say they look similar, but one looks younger?

    This is her by the way.

    [–]i_have_boobies 0 points1 point ago

    Then I misinterpreted the context.

    [–]OlePuddinHead 0 points1 point ago

    Oh Uncle Paul

    [–]Picklwarrior 0 points1 point ago

    Dem eyes

    That's what does it for me at least

    load more comments (14 replies)

      [–]thisaccountisgay 66 points67 points ago

      As a gay man, she's number one on my list for girls I would go straight for. Great actor with a great sense of humour and I could play video games with her.

      [–]xeliasx 44 points45 points ago

      this guy knows what the fuck is up

      [–]aboothemonkey 9 points10 points ago

      dat username...

      [–]lethrowface 2 points3 points ago

      So, you're saying it's a choice?

      edit: I'm not saying I think it's a choice, just wondering about your wording there...

      I must admit there are a few rare guys that I might possibly go gay for, just temporarily, just to see what it's like. But my allegiance to the female body remains true.

      [–]glaciator 5 points6 points ago

      No, but if he had one, it'd be her.

      [–]namefaceguy 2 points3 points ago

      This is the way I figure it. Beyond all PC labels and stereotypes everyone has a brain. Everyone with a brain has a choice. Everyone has dna and hormone leveles that predispose them to different behavior types but in the end everyone has free will and can and will do whatever they want. People are curious. I hate the stigma that just because they want something or try something once in their life that is what they are from now on. People aren't born with labels, stop trying to impose them on people.

      [–]T0PHER911 -1 points0 points ago

      YEAH! What he said...

      [–]videogameexpert 1 point2 points ago

      It's more like a sliding scale.

      [–]brynsul -2 points-1 points ago

      can you name a role in which she showed any real range or acting talent? I personally gave up on her as an actress after watching Book of Eli.

      [–]rotarded 2 points3 points ago

      who cares

      [–]brynsul 0 points1 point ago

      people who enjoy good acting

      [–]BimmerQK 0 points1 point ago

      Black swan maybe?

      [–]brynsul 0 points1 point ago

      i did not see kunis' performance to be special, i did find portman to be quite different from her normal roles though.

      load more comments (1 reply)

        [–]opposable-thumbs 50 points51 points ago

        http://i.imgur.com/xam5q.jpg

        [–]Microchaton 9 points10 points ago

        Oh, okay.

        load more comments (1 reply)

          [–]larpas 83 points84 points ago

          Above average girl - clothes + photoshop = sexiest woman alive?

          [–]showmethenicethings 32 points33 points ago

          Above average girl + lighting + wardrobe + make-up + location + photographer + photoshop = sexiest woman alive

          FTFY

          [–]Picklwarrior 14 points15 points ago

          Photoshop = sexiest woman alive

          FTFTFY

          [–]Zephrous 6 points7 points ago

          with Photoshop, even MEN can be sexy ladies!

          [–]T0PHER911 2 points3 points ago

          My turn!

          [–]seeashbashrun 1 point2 points ago

          My sister is an actress and when she sees her ads in magazines she does not recognize herself. She knows it's her, because of the ad and her hair and whatnot, but it doesn't feel like herself. Totally creepy.

          load more comments (1 reply)

            [–]Mrs_Mojo_Rising 40 points41 points ago

            Her farts probably smell like a field of lavender.

            [–]langleypeterson 15 points16 points ago

            girls don't fart, stupid

            [–]usernametakenmyass 18 points19 points ago

            wrong

            [–]DarkTwistedFantasy 2 points3 points ago

            I'm actually dying

            ugh

            [–]TsterT 4 points5 points ago

            Technically she is dying. Very, very slowly.

            [–]Zephrous 3 points4 points ago

            every day we die a little more

            [–]fruit_basket 2 points3 points ago

            I'm dead inside anyway.

            [–]El_Rey_de_Reyes[S] 6 points7 points ago

            Mmmmm...lavender.

            [–]ilikefarts -1 points0 points ago

            id suck her farts through a garden hose.

            [–]phaeton_didnt_quit 7 points8 points ago

            i've met her cousin. she's hotter.

            get that around your heads - her cousin is hotter.

            [–]guillermomclean 5 points6 points ago

            I want proof!

            [–]phaeton_didnt_quit -1 points0 points ago

            we hung out a few times during university. years ago.

            oh god it's been that long ... T.T

            [–]T0PHER911 1 point2 points ago

            I'm sure she just said that so she could get you in the sack... oh wait. She isn't a guy.

            [–]Jtownsend 33 points34 points ago

            Does anyone else just not care about this sort of thing?

            [–]i_have_boobies 5 points6 points ago

            Then you clicked on it because...?

            [–]DrunkenAss 2 points3 points ago

            Going down the blue links, and hey, Mila Kunis is pretty hot. I don't mind seeing pictures of hot chicks, but why the fuck am I in the comments? I don't know and now I'm leaving.

            [–]OnyxOak -5 points-4 points ago

            Totally agreed. Save this shit for /r/Celebs or /r/MilaKunis, jesus christ.

            [–]PyroKaos 13 points14 points ago

            On behalf of the entirety of reddit, I apologize. In the future, we will tailor all content on r/pics to pictures that ONLY appeal to you.

            [–]OnyxOak -2 points-1 points ago

            There are subreddits for posts like this.

            [–]T0PHER911 -1 points0 points ago

            "We have technology!"

            Patrick Star

            load more comments (1 reply)

              [–]UkrainianBadger 1 point2 points ago

              Yeeeahhh. She's one of us.

              [–]Battleflame 1 point2 points ago

              She's a Ukrainian Badger?

              [–]T0PHER911 0 points1 point ago

              Don't you feel bad for those who aren't?

              [–]unr3a1r00t 12 points13 points ago

              After reviewing all the evidence, I would have to concur with Esquire's conclusion.

              http://i.imgur.com/A5QDu.jpg http://i.imgur.com/nYsMq.jpg http://i.imgur.com/U8M0Y.jpg http://i.imgur.com/CJomS.jpg http://i.imgur.com/CPFNY.jpg

              She is very sexy, and while beauty is subjective, I still agree with Esquire.

              [–]Picklwarrior 4 points5 points ago

              Am I the only one that thinks it looks like her eyes are looking different directions in #4?

              [–]Vsx 4 points5 points ago

              Photoshop does amazing things.

              [–]kilo4fun -1 points0 points ago

              Either she has the derp, or you do. Recommend immediate rectification before permanent derpitude sets in.

              [–]T0PHER911 0 points1 point ago

              It's because all sexy women are chameleons.

              load more comments (2 replies)

                [–]timaaaaaaay 14 points15 points ago

                I am all for this. I do not find her all that attractive, nor provocative in any sort of sensual or sexual way. Would I turn down the chance for a tumble in the hay with her? Absolutely not, however, if she is to be the benchmark that all other women compare themselves to, I will have a much better chance at women who should be WAAAAAAY out of my league but now are considered, not as sexy or provocative. Go Esquire!

                [–]gloomdoom -2 points-1 points ago

                I'm sure that Mila lays away at night wondering how she's going to get a chance to score with a guy named 'timaaaaaaay' who spends all day long in front of a computer and wallowing in social networking.

                Can we cease with the incessant, 'I would bang her if she...blah, blah, blah.'

                That's cool and all but she wouldn't bang you so the comment is completely moot.

                [–]timaaaaaaay 1 point2 points ago

                ITP: Someone who did not read mine.

                [–]DoubleCMahoney -1 points0 points ago

                Don't just read the first part and reply dude

                [–]MachineWash 7 points8 points ago

                She's played World of Warcraft, she can speak russian, and she is gorgeous. What else do you people want?

                [–]scofmb 13 points14 points ago

                We want her in our bed?

                [–]iMacHunt 10 points11 points ago

                The people saying "yes" and "no" in this thread are all wrong, attractiveness is completely subjective. So you're all right, but only if you're speaking for yourself.

                [–]GreyOrangeGrey 4 points5 points ago

                Beauty is nowhere near "completely subjective."

                [–]yes_faceless 0 points1 point ago

                Beauty IS actually an objective thing and can be defined by phi, the golden ratio.

                He's right, people mean "attractive". Technically a dude could find a cripple hippo attractive but that does not make it beautiful. Attractive is completely up to the person.

                Beauty is not in the eye of the beholder.

                [–]mitotajc 0 points1 point ago

                More of a psi man myself, but phi's cool.

                [–]iMacHunt 0 points1 point ago

                Agreed, but we're talking about a thread entitled "... sexiest woman alive" which is entirely subjective. But yes, there are winners and losers when it comes to attractiveness, but arguing over who s the "sexiest" is an entirely different angle.

                [–]GreyOrangeGrey 1 point2 points ago

                Absolutely. Picking the sexiest out of a group of similarly attractive people just isn't possible, but their beauty is determined by the ideal proportions and ratios they possess -- and only slightly subjective by individual preferences.

                [–]GuitarWizard90 2 points3 points ago

                I've met girls that are just as pretty, and prettier, who aren't celebs. The title of "sexiest woman alive" is ridiculous, in my opinion.

                [–]jesq 2 points3 points ago

                I'd Mila her Kunis.

                [–]BossBlastoise 2 points3 points ago

                Kate Upton, Scarlett Johansen, Megan Fox (no prego) and others. But her?

                [–]FireKnightV 11 points12 points ago

                In other news, the sky is blue. More at 11.

                [–]ceezirr 0 points1 point ago

                Thanks for the update, Ollie Williams.

                [–]monkeysnow 1 point2 points ago

                http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ktAKHww9wPo

                [–]Wooknows 0 points1 point ago

                here it's quite rainy, so this explains that

                [–]Communistist 12 points13 points ago

                i always thought Donna was hotter

                [–]Maluz91 3 points4 points ago

                Not gonna lie, i really don't find her that attractive.

                [–]theghoul -1 points0 points ago

                As do I. She's good looking, smart and funny but.. Sexiest woman alive?

                There's girls at a my local college whom would fare better (U of Michigan).

                [–]Vixolus 4 points5 points ago

                "WHERE TO EAT NOW:" on the right.

                ಠ_ಠ

                [–]ANAL_QUEEN 1 point2 points ago

                She's pretty, smart, and funny. More like the perfect woman. I would be jealous, but she's too darn likable.

                [–]fruitcommander 3 points4 points ago

                Shut up Meg.

                [–]Luthos 3 points4 points ago

                She's hot, but she's no Scarlett Johansson.

                [–]Taubin 3 points4 points ago

                Why is this in pics? It's a magazine cover, with a title about a magazine. Nothing to do with photography or great photos.

                [–]lalondtm 0 points1 point ago

                I disagree. Hot, but sexiest woman alive? Nope

                [–]roo-ster -4 points-3 points ago

                Not even close.

                [–]FormerEbayAddict 0 points1 point ago

                I'm going to require more photographic evidence to confirm this claim.

                [–][deleted] ago

                [deleted]

                [–]ARod527 3 points4 points ago

                She has none. I am an ass man and she is still sexiest woman alive in my book. That says a lot.

                [–]DRosado20 -1 points0 points ago

                OP is a Don Omar fan right? I think I found my soulmate...

                [–]jzstyles -1 points0 points ago

                I don't know how I feel about this because she looks a lot like one of my cousins...

                [–]JimTheFishxd4 -1 points0 points ago

                I didn't vote for her.

                [–]countdamoney 1 point2 points ago

                It's notworthy that the other two big stories feature Philip Seymour Hoffman and Chris Christe, both of whom are incredibly un-sexy.

                [–]Satiracuz -1 points0 points ago

                But what really turns me on from Milla is when she speaks

                [–]kareemabduljabbq -1 points0 points ago

                21 things you should never say while eating. get me to a news stand, I have to buy this.

                [–]Joe3po -1 points0 points ago

                yep.

                [–]ayraerae 0 points1 point ago

                Now I can tell my kids I've met the sexiest woman alive... during 2012.

                [–]Joshivity 0 points1 point ago

                How goes the spam?

                [–]superfudge 0 points1 point ago

                I see that Mila Kunis' publicist won the checkbook race this year.

                [–]ChubakasBush 0 points1 point ago

                yep. its not how you look, its how "hot" you are on the trend. and she's pretty trendy right now.

                [–]chris241978 -1 points0 points ago

                I totally agree with this statement by esquire

                [–]Defcon458 0 points1 point ago

                Esquire is dead wrong!

                [–]fastballaway 1 point2 points ago

                Esquire must have a huge scout team that scours the earth looking for the hottest woman.

                Or they just walk around Hollywood.

                [–]MONDARIZ 0 points1 point ago

                Meh, what's with the junkie makeup?

                [–]Fyreffect 1 point2 points ago

                ... Nope. It's a completely subjective thing anyways.

                [–]spellchekcer 0 points1 point ago

                The reason why she's sexiest woman alive for me is not her physical attractiveness...it's her fucking sense of humor. God damn, I wanna fuck that personality!

                [–]JJRains 1 point2 points ago

                "False. Actually Scarlett Johansson is."- Dwight Schrute.

                [–]P357 1 point2 points ago

                much agreed!

                [–]DannyLovesDerby 0 points1 point ago

                yeah well, they have obviously never seen the girls on r/gonewild

                [–]CoyoteStark -1 points0 points ago

                DAE sex with Mila Kunis?!?

                [–]BurningMelon 0 points1 point ago

                "Where to eat now:"

                Perfect article placement.

                [–]SlapChopNinja 0 points1 point ago

                Should be titled "Esquires top chick you wouldnt kick out of bed."

                [–]Naynae -1 points0 points ago

                NO

                [–]krustyluv -1 points0 points ago

                great bod, but face looka like a man

                [–]fjphoenix -1 points0 points ago

                Would not bang. Where is the ass? How am i supposed to spread them cheeks now?

                [–]snatchamouse 0 points1 point ago

                yup

                [–]ckolev 0 points1 point ago

                Her belly looks very badly PS'ed. Its like those jeans are just painted on her body.

                [–]xfiles9302 0 points1 point ago

                Before After

                [–]SuperKingBender 0 points1 point ago

                She Def not hot.... Who the fuck does these things? And how do they do their research?

                [–]greencloud 0 points1 point ago

                Really? Sexiest? Because of a good agent ? ? ?

                [–]ThaFreakyOne 0 points1 point ago

                Sounds about right...

                [–]Frostacular 0 points1 point ago

                Yes

                [–]epic_awesome 0 points1 point ago

                Meh.

                [–]Penglishman 0 points1 point ago

                as opposed to all the hot dead girls...seriously, necrophiliacs have feelings too.

                [–]aleczapka 0 points1 point ago

                Kim Beckinsale disagrees

                [–]asimovfan1 1 point2 points ago

                I want to own my own magazine so I can make up headlines declaring hugely speculative and subjective 'facts'.

                "ASIMOVFAN1 SEXIEST MUTHAPHUQA ALIVE"

                [–]Daell 1 point2 points ago

                sorry Mila, but Charlize Theron is still alive! (i hope so)

                [–]BimmerQK 0 points1 point ago

                No matter your opinion of Ashton Kutcher, you have to admit he is one lucky SOB

                [–]BigMax55 1 point2 points ago

                Someone alert r/gentlemanboners

                [–]ChubakasBush 1 point2 points ago

                I went to school with that chick and I still don't think she's the sexiest woman alive. That's just ridiculous. Olivia Wild is the sexiest woman alive.

                [–]Hylek 0 points1 point ago

                Scarlet Johansen?

                [–]NotKaz -2 points-1 points ago

                That's a funny way to spell Kate Upton

                [–]GldRush98 3 points4 points ago

                Reddit proves... no matter how drop dead gorgeous you are... even being named sexiest woman alive... there are still people out there to hate on you and bring you down.

                What a bunch of a sad bitter shit heads.

                [–]sENT_from_space -1 points0 points ago

                Agreed

                [–]guyguy23 0 points1 point ago

                I agree.

                [–]thekindred 1 point2 points ago

                I really hate how they have these competitions. For me this woman is millions of miles from the sexiest woman alive.

                [–]BongMaster395 -2 points-1 points ago

                completely agree

                [–]dasamps -2 points-1 points ago

                Most overrated woman alive is more like it.

                [–]uberjugend -1 points0 points ago

                Ashton ruined it

                [–]bro_latona 1 point2 points ago

                Then who is the sexiest woman dead?

                [–]RoiMan -3 points-2 points ago

                Meh.

                [–]PhotoshopMogul -3 points-2 points ago

                I agree. Oh god I agree so hard.

                [–]nfineon -2 points-1 points ago

                She is Short and and sporting A cups = sexiest woman alive? She still looks like a teenager, sorry that barely qualifies as a woman and I'm sure they choose her to boost ratings as that would be a controversial choice. Above average yes, but sexiest no..

                [–]i_have_boobies 0 points1 point ago

                That is quite a round about way to call yourself a pig headed piece of shit.

                I'm not saying this because I'm a huge Mila Kunis fan, I'm saying this because I'm sure there are lots of beautiful WOMEN sporting a cups and a fit body that would take a blow to their already weakened self-esteem if they read that idiotic statement. Thinking that any small breasted short woman "barely qualifies as a woman" should have been kept to yourself. You are surely not the embodiment of the perfect man or woman either.

                [–]Proportional_Switch -3 points-2 points ago

                No way, Charlize Theron in my books

                [–]broconsulate -2 points-1 points ago

                She's hot no doubt but she kindof has a bitch face. I think there are much hotter girls. I don't know why she's getting so much attention.

                [–]Brett25 -2 points-1 points ago

                I'm going to have to strongly disagree.

                [–]OlympianDave -1 points0 points ago

                Sure, she is very very hot but nowhere even near the "hottest"

                [–]SirDerpingtonThe3rd -2 points-1 points ago

                Shut up, Meg.

                Also...just no. I like her, but this is a load of shit.

                [–]OODintheROOM -2 points-1 points ago

                Damnit Meg...

                [–]OnyxOak 0 points1 point ago

                THIS IS NOT /r/Celebs or /r/MilaKunis JESUS CHRIST 3 MILA KUNIS POSTS WITHIN 2 DAYS IN /r/pics

                [–]waltonsimons -4 points-3 points ago

                I had no idea Christina Hendricks had died.

                load more comments (39 replies)

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