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all 120 comments

[–]homebrewtj 64 points65 points ago

I was a catcher in high school and college, and I always hated when the ump was on my ass like that. Never understood it.

[–]agadams08 31 points32 points ago

I can only assume that being closer to the catcher lowers the risk of being hit by a pass ball or foul tip, especially one between the catcher's legs. It's still pretty unsettling.

[–]JudahBotwin 51 points52 points ago

foul tip

But just the tip.

[–]sweetambrosia 3 points4 points ago

Or ouch ouch you're on my hair

[–]mtg4l 1 point2 points ago

It's really the only way to get your face RIGHT over his shoulder and accurately call the pitches. I don't know why the ump's hand is on Posey's chest though...

[–]88leo 0 points1 point ago

Hi is stimulating the catcher so that his mitt will be secreting when he receives the pitch.

[–]yrogerg123 24 points25 points ago

Catcher in more ways than one, ehh? EHH?

[–]natstrap 8 points9 points ago

The closer the ump is to the catcher and the closer he is to level with the strike zone, the better his angle is to get a strike call correct... Right?

[–]88leo 0 points1 point ago

So he is just taking, err giving, one for the team?

[–]to-to-to-todayjunior 7 points8 points ago

I would imagine it would make playing the position harder too, if the pitch was a little wild or in the dirt. Would definitely suck crouching like that with a grown man on you too.

[–]Tovora 13 points14 points ago

Also, the erection.

[–]88leo 0 points1 point ago

No, he said harder.

[–]cdskip 4 points5 points ago

Ditto.

Put your hand or hands on me, fine, no problem, that's actually kinda helpful. But if start resting your weight on me like one fat old fuck used to, I'm gonna get mad, and if you get as close as this guy, you'd better have the goddamn courtesy to at least give me a reacharound.

[–]homebrewtj 2 points3 points ago

Ha Exactly. I said something like that to a guy once and he just chuckled and kept on keeping on.

[–]EDSire10 2 points3 points ago

Me too, I hated when they would hover over me; it made blocking and quick throws to 2nd a pain in the ass, because I would constantly bump into the ump.

[–]DrQuailMan 1 point2 points ago

You'd bump into the ump with your rump?

[–]EDSire10 0 points1 point ago

well played

[–]sturg1dj 1 point2 points ago

i was going to post something like this. It was always weird when you got one of those umps that got right in there.

[–]gefiltefishblues 118 points119 points ago

just letting him know the count is 2-0.

[–]peterquest 62 points63 points ago

two balls and a near strike.

[–]Taylorvongrela 21 points22 points ago

via his anus?

[–]Ikimasen 20 points21 points ago

Morse code

[–]NashedPotatos 34 points35 points ago

More ass code.

[–]docterpeanutbutter 37 points38 points ago

That's what we call getting cosey with posey

[–]---sniff--- 0 points1 point ago

I always thought that was referencing this Posey

[–]mgonzo46 39 points40 points ago

All he's doing is making sure that the catcher isn't planning on killing the Queen!

[–]colonelhomer415 19 points20 points ago

It's Enrico Palazzo!!!

[–]Zeake 67 points68 points ago

ump whispering "Just the tip"

[–]coming_up_milhouse 55 points56 points ago

If the catcher didn't want it, he wouldn't have bent over in that sexy uniform.

[–]brokenarrow 8 points9 points ago

"Just to see how it feels."

[–]zaxerone -4 points-3 points ago

[–]rmosk 24 points25 points ago

He is the only giant who scored tonight

[–]Millerwhite 6 points7 points ago

Arias, bro

[–]thebiggestbear 98 points99 points ago

Looks like the Braves arn't the only ones getting f***ed in the playoffs.

[–]putsomebacononit 121 points122 points ago

This is reddit, you can say fuck.

[–]Helpfulandattractive -5 points-4 points ago

Romney for president!

[–]beniro 3 points4 points ago

Hey, shut the fuck up! :)

[–]DeckersDelight[S] 26 points27 points ago

As a Braves fan, this had me laughing hard.

[–]builtby 13 points14 points ago

So hard.

[–]mild_resolve 9 points10 points ago

Braves got "fucked" by 4 unearned runs and 12 LOB. The late infield fly call didn't help them, but you shouldn't forget that they also benefited with a 2-run homer resulting from a late timeout call in the second.

[–]zaphod_85 0 points1 point ago

Yeah, the umps were awful for everybody in that game. One of the worst-officiated games I have ever seen.

[–]snoharm 6 points7 points ago

Someone didn't watch football the last few months.

[–]zaphod_85 0 points1 point ago

Correction: One of the worst-officiated baseball games I have ever seen.

[–]GreetingsADM 0 points1 point ago

Stereotypical St. Louisan.

[–]tbeach17 12 points13 points ago

If I had a chance to do that to Buster, I'd do it too. No homo. Maybe just slightly. Guys, it's Buster Posey.

[–]DanIpp 5 points6 points ago

I'd mount Buster Posey too, the guy's phenomenal

[–]ChickenBaconPoutine 3 points4 points ago

This hump

[–]NYCRounder 10 points11 points ago

If we have the technology available to call balls and strikes with 100% accuracy, why do we leave up to the umps still and subject catchers to this?

[–]Disco_Drew 17 points18 points ago

As a Seahawks fan, I approve of the human officials. Unless it's the Superbowl. Fuck those guys.

[–]Disco_Drew 0 points1 point ago

I would feel less guilty if that wasn't The Onion.

[–]noelsusman 1 point2 points ago

Not everybody likes it or realizes it, but understanding the differences between umpires and their strike zones is part of the game. Also the strike zone in the official MLB rules is not the strike zone used by 99% of umpires, and it has been like that since forever.

[–]s_s 2 points3 points ago

In baseball: Instant feedback/decision making.

Umpires can signal things instantly (e.g. calling a runner out) that affects other aspects of a play (do I continue to try to tag this runner or throw to another base to try and get the other runner?).

[–]adremeaux 8 points9 points ago

No one said you have to get rid of them for everything else. Just don't let them call balls and strikes anymore.

[–]s_s 0 points1 point ago

In that case you's still have an ump humping the catcher, then.

And something I always ask at that suggestion: who determines if a batter's check-swing offered at a pitch? The computer?

[–]mionendy 0 points1 point ago

combine both. umpire is back there but has an ipad thingy that shows him exactly where the ball crossed the plate along with the exact strike zone for each batter. based on the image and what he witnessed, he can quickly call a ball or strike with near 100% accuracy. he would only have to use it for close pitches too (obv strikes and balls don't even need to be checked).

[–]baitingforyears -1 points0 points ago

fucking stupid.

[–]adremeaux 0 points1 point ago

That one is extremely easy for a computer. Did the tip of the bat pass perpendicular? Probably easier than calling strikes.

[–]socoamaretto 1 point2 points ago

Yeah, it's called a camera on both sides of the box, I don't know how this hasn't been implemented already.

[–]Ahmon -1 points0 points ago

As the comments imply, this is unusual for an umpire to do. And no, we don't have the technology to call balls and strikes with 100% accuracy. The computer display you see on TV isn't perfectly accurate. Could we switch to an automated system that didn't guarantee near-perfect accuracy? No, that's not in human nature. We'd rather have a poorer, human system.

[–]socoamaretto 0 points1 point ago

Why can't they use the system tennis uses?

[–]sturg1dj 0 points1 point ago

you mean human, but give batters a couple of challenges?

[–]socoamaretto 0 points1 point ago

No, use Hawkeye, or whatever it's called for every pitch.

[–]sturg1dj 0 points1 point ago

i wonder how that would work. You can't do it overhead because you need to know if balls are low or high, you can't do it straight on because the pitcher is in the way. All other angles used in games are at an angle which I would imagine would make it more difficult to get calls 100% accurate(either angled down from centerfield like for Twins home games or left center/right center). I am not doubting that it is possible, just wondering about specifics. It has already been stated in this thread that the ones used during broadcasts (like foxtrax or whatever it is called) are not 100% accurate.

[–]socoamaretto 0 points1 point ago

Yeah, I'm sure there are some dificulties, but it seemed pretty advanced, I think they use 10-15 cameras to pinpoint the balls location. It's probably different because it's not hitting a surface though.

[–]EnderSavesTheDay 5 points6 points ago

Well I'm a heterosexual male, but damn it's Buster Posey, do you blame him?

[–]BeastAP23 0 points1 point ago

Looked at this for a bout 10 seconds trying to justify why he would be right there before i started cracking up.

[–]OlmecsTempleGuard 2 points3 points ago

Well, yeah. He's the catcher.

[–]colts300 2 points3 points ago

Matt Cain was supposed to be pitching tonight...

[–]Donttouchmethurr 2 points3 points ago

Looks like there's another player in the ol' pitcher and catcher game.

[–]yrogerg123 -1 points0 points ago

And people say baseball isn't sexy.

[–]jumpman024 1 point2 points ago

That's a different way to hump, er... ump a game

[–]Arc_ 0 points1 point ago

Man, he is close - looks like he's spotting him on squats.

[–]Duzzy_Funlop 0 points1 point ago

If you ask me, he's not close enough.

[–]k1ngmad 0 points1 point ago

stick it in there real nice

[–]colonelhomer415 1 point2 points ago

Gives "right down the middle" a whole new meaning

[–]bcrout 0 points1 point ago

Looks like he's in the right spot to me

[–]About64Narwhals 1 point2 points ago

Well, they are in San Francisco.

[–]jboogie216 1 point2 points ago

They don't call them the "catcher" for nothing.

[–]jerebearrr 0 points1 point ago

Putting the ump in hump. I like it.

[–]thehighercritic 0 points1 point ago

"Buster Posey" is my new euphemism.

[–]thomasknowland 0 points1 point ago

For the love of the game

[–]OakendaleAbbey 0 points1 point ago

Was nobody else reminded of this?

[–]rightinthepujols 0 points1 point ago

As a catcher, I fucking hate umps that touch you, but come on blue wait till after the game.

[–]Icantevenhavemyname 0 points1 point ago

He's pretending that it's Parker Posey.

[–]agent3613 0 points1 point ago

I wish I was the ump, and buster was Amy G.

[–]Kiantalai 0 points1 point ago

check out playmatchup.com a site where athletes can rank each other and make groups with teammates/friends

[–]Willie_The_Pimp 0 points1 point ago

Frank Drebin...

[–]Kairick 1 point2 points ago

too*

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]why_so_Sirius 0 points1 point ago

Why would Joe Paterno have been proud?

[–]muttmonster 2 points3 points ago

Because Joe Paterno pretended he didn't notice what Jerry Sandusky (convicted child rapist) was doing in his organization. So mgrifone is following in Paterno's footsteps and thus he would be proud.

Also, I'm not sure if this is an actual question or a hypothetical one.

[–]Jonny_Watts 1 point2 points ago

Did you miss the joke about pretending to have not seen it?

[–]BubbaRay88 -1 points0 points ago

I didn't know Penn State had a baseball team!!