all 86 comments

[–]funkphiler 64 points65 points ago

Yeah that is kinda weird... She likes the guy so she shoves his toothbrush up'er ass???

[–]borkborkbork99 92 points93 points ago

Hey- I just met you and this is crazy... I fucked your toothbrush, And my butthole's BLAZING

[–]BestPseudonym 3 points4 points ago

Get rid of "and" and it'll actually fit the original. And put a semi-colon after toothbrush

[–]borkborkbork99 2 points3 points ago

Thanks!

[–]DefaultAsAwesome 20 points21 points ago

No, she stole his toothbrush and used it as an anal dildo.

Edit: My bad, I read that wrong. I thought you said "She likes the guy because he shoves his toothbrush up'er ass???".

[–]Mecha_Bear 12 points13 points ago

That's exactly what they said

[–]DefaultAsAwesome 19 points20 points ago

He wrote "so she shoves", I read "because he shoves".

[–]dpaddragoon 53 points54 points ago

down by the sea shore

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

tooth brush whore?

[–]NoSleepForMeEVER 0 points1 point ago

Couldn't agree more

[–]funkphiler 0 points1 point ago

I did say that. However you said she used it as a dildo and went to the hospital because her anus was burned... Thought it was a buttdildo.

[–]mrzisme 0 points1 point ago

Stories like this are funnier when they're true. There's no way this one's true though, although it's being passed off as it is.

[–]mackinoncougars 7 points8 points ago

Well, I think we've all been there before.

[–]camibarrera 10 points11 points ago

If she liked you, why did she put it up her ass?

[–]mackinoncougars 10 points11 points ago

I try to tell my girlfriend, if she likes me, why not.

[–]DefaultAsAwesome 4 points5 points ago

Well, I found this on my Facebook feed, so don't ask me.

[–]Pmmenon 0 points1 point ago

You know the difference between Fact and Fiction? Fiction has to make sense. O_o

[–]Discular 0 points1 point ago

If you like it then you should have put your ring on it.

[–]avoiding_politics 0 points1 point ago

NO. You're the ring on it.

[–]AllTattedUpJay 1 point2 points ago

Pretending it was his cock, perhaps?

[–]SisterPhister 0 points1 point ago

To get off, maybe?

[–]blackbird2379 7 points8 points ago

I've eaten Ghost Chili sauce. Worst pain imaginable from only a single drop. The spicy lasts for about 30 minutes and only gets hotter for the first 10. I had the smallest bit of residue on my finger and didn't realize it when I went to the bathroom and got a little on my dick. Holy fuck it was awful. I feel so bad for that girl.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

I've done that before, y'know, with my dick...

Biggest boner ever.

[–]OgGorrilaKing -1 points0 points ago

So misterfanwank is Insanity Wolf's internet alias.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

I've been masturbating to progressively more and more disturbing porn for years and I'm continually fighting boredom. This was the next logical step. The last logical step was porn of woundsex.

[–]Something-Unique 4 points5 points ago

....... What??

[–]vinsite 3 points4 points ago

Wait, just wait one second. 12 years old and choices anal penetration over vaginal. I am so glad i do not have daughters.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

keeps hymen intact

[–]ijustwantanfingname 1 point2 points ago

That is the absolute first thing that came to my mind as well.

[–]bluebonnetcafe 14 points15 points ago

This should seriously be in WTF, because... WTF?

[–]mackinoncougars 26 points27 points ago

One thing I've learned about r/WTF is that no one thinks what you post belongs in r/WTF.

[–]raevpet 1 point2 points ago

Unless they do, then they'll all comment on how that post is better than the usual stuff.

[–]HomeButton 3 points4 points ago

Ass to mouth?

[–]DefaultAsAwesome 3 points4 points ago

Sorry that the next part is cut out, I couldn't find the rest of it.

[–]dick_rickles 4 points5 points ago

So you're saying you stole this?

[–]gavinflud 1 point2 points ago

He has clearly stated this isn't his own personal story by referring to the boyfriend in this as "he" instead of "me."

[–]dick_rickles 1 point2 points ago

I understand it's not his story, but he said he found it on his feed. So that means he could have gotten the rest of the story.

[–]gavinflud 0 points1 point ago

Sorry, I thought you thought it was his story. My mistake.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]dick_rickles 2 points3 points ago

Then how can you not find the rest of it?

Edit: That was the OP that deleted his comment. He said he found it on his news feed.

Edit 2: I think I made OP quit his own post. I don't know how I feel about this.

[–]DefaultAsAwesome -1 points0 points ago

Because it was only one picture, and Google wouldn't help?

[–]dick_rickles 0 points1 point ago

So...you stole it

[–]AScholarlyGentleman 0 points1 point ago

There was a trend at my school for a while where the guys would eat ghost chili peppers and carry them around in their pockets for some reason. My friend accidentally rubbed his eye after eating one and had to go to the nurse for nearly an hour.

[–]PhilxBefore 0 points1 point ago

wat

[–]AScholarlyGentleman 0 points1 point ago

Yeah. High schoolers are strange people.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Tugut 1 point2 points ago

Note to self: Always wash toothbrush after using it as a dildo

[–]PhilxBefore 0 points1 point ago

And before.

[–]thingsineedtoknow -1 points0 points ago

COLB-

No, I just can't anymore. Why do people think sticking various brush's up the pooper is acceptable?!?

[–]StarfighterProx 0 points1 point ago

Why do people think using an apostrophe on a non-possessive plural word is acceptable? The world is a mysterious place.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Why would anybody want to put this on facebook...

[–]girldinosaurs 0 points1 point ago

He thought someone was messing with his toothbrush so he put something spicy on it? Sounds legit.

[–][deleted] -4 points-3 points ago

fake.

[–]Cintoclops 0 points1 point ago

So much nope.

[–]ElGatoTheManCat -1 points0 points ago

Too bad you can't get burns from peppers, only inflamation

[–]Tastygroove 3 points4 points ago

They make great eye drops. Try some.

You may decide to amend your thesaurus thereafter.

[–]monopolymonocle 1 point2 points ago

The sensation of "burning" does not mean that you get a burn. He is correct that you cannot get burns, thermal or chemical, from peppers. You should amend the next edition of your self-published dictionary accordingly.

On a side note, I know it's tricky that similar sounding words can have very different meanings, or even more than one meaning requiring you to use context clues, but don't let this discourage you.

[–]gbs5009 0 points1 point ago

Sufficiently spicy stuff can raise blisters. Close enough to a burn in my book.