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Submit your Halloween pumpkin pics to /r/horror's carving competition!

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top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]AdvocateForLucifer 1278 points1279 points ago

That's one for the high school yearbook.

This picture is going to get your brother laid.

[–]UsernameNotFound404 544 points545 points ago

He'll be able to play this out far beyond college. A pic like this drops panties on the spot.

[–]jwitham2002 541 points542 points ago

That kid has the hair of a golden GOD

[–]BeezowPooPoo_ZGopGop 227 points228 points ago

He is GOD.

[–]AdvocateForLucifer 283 points284 points ago

Checkmate, Atheists.

[–]UsernameNotFound404 113 points114 points ago

God of Thunderpussy!

[–]Randamba 56 points57 points ago

And he probably wears Thunderpants!

[–]NomadofExile[!] 41 points42 points ago

And travels to the land down Thunder.

[–]Portlander 18 points19 points ago

Thunder... Thunder... Thunder... Thundercats... HOOO!

[–]captcha_trampstamp 10 points11 points ago

They're a bit more like Thunderoos at this point in time.

[–]C_W_S 15 points16 points ago

Your username......

[–]AdvocateForLucifer 23 points24 points ago

Like I said. Game. Set. Match. Try again in some other dimension.

[–]steffanlv 2 points3 points ago

There's only one God and i'm pretty sure that ain't him

  • Capt. America

[–]8GB 236 points237 points ago

His wang will gain school-wide recognition as the legendary "Thor's Hammer".

[–]mrquixotic 191 points192 points ago

"MJOLNIR, ARISE!"

[–]furmat60 101 points102 points ago

I'm going to yell this every time I'm about to have an erection.

[–]mrquixotic 70 points71 points ago

We will hold you to that.

[–]Adsykong 55 points56 points ago

Just hope he holds it to us.

[–]red_280 6 points7 points ago

I will hold it for him.

[–]burntsoup 11 points12 points ago

No you need to train yourself so that when you yell it your dick gets hard.

[–]vivestalin 30 points31 points ago

If my boyfriend did that, I would not hate it.

[–]SirZer0th 4 points5 points ago

What exactly? Have an erection or yelling "Mjolnir, arise!", or maybe both?

[–]vivestalin 6 points7 points ago

Both.

[–]Dharmasabitch 69 points70 points ago

as a community can we stop for a second and ask ourselves why are we naming a child's dick

[–]8GB 47 points48 points ago

Well in this hypothetical situation, we're naming a teenager's dick.

[–]AdhesiveTapeCarry 3 points4 points ago

[–]Regneva 55 points56 points ago

Anders' father already has that title, sir.

[–]chillwithmywaffle 47 points48 points ago

Because ALL dads have huge dad dicks.

[–]DaTScientisT 47 points48 points ago

Only back in the 80s man. Dad dicks dude, scary.

[–]DaTScientisT 48 points49 points ago

Only back in the 80s man. Dad dicks dude, scary.

[–]nealio1000 27 points28 points ago

I upvoted you both times just because I like Workaholics.

[–]Trents_V 65 points66 points ago

[–]VigilantOrphan 30 points31 points ago

Reddit: sees a picture of a young boy, proceeds to talk about his penis and future sex life. Do we have problems?

[–]JZobel 13 points14 points ago

[–]ThusSpokeDrew 32 points33 points ago

this is one for the yearbook.

[–]AdvocateForLucifer 11 points12 points ago

Needs a cat somewhere.

[–]ThusSpokeDrew 53 points54 points ago

[–]thatonefatass 9 points10 points ago

puuuuuuuuuurfect

[–]trolldaddyismyname 3 points4 points ago

Hahahahahaha.

I love the internets.

[–]NotVerySmarts 36 points37 points ago

The tiny little horses prancing in the background totally make the picture.

[–]AngelixArch 9 points10 points ago

sigh Why the fuck is it all about sex all of a sudden? It's just an adorable little kid with what appears to be damn long hair... Why in the fucking world would 'getting laid' matter?

[–]verisimilarity 6 points7 points ago

I love how pictures of little boys are always met with "ladies, contain your orgasms" or "he's getting laid" comments, but pictures of little girls could never be.

[–]babysealsareyummy 22 points23 points ago

Years from now: Come and get it ladies

[–]tbrennem 16 points17 points ago

Thank you for that sex, I'll have another.

[–]azyzzbrah 8 points9 points ago

I don't think you understand how getting laid works.

[–]AdvocateForLucifer 11 points12 points ago

Well, when the birds and bees really like each other... ah, fuck. Go ask your mother.

[–]dronethrone 307 points308 points ago

JESUS CHRIST IS THAT HIS REAL HAIR?!?

[–]angrycalculator 652 points653 points ago

[–]PerilPhoSho 209 points210 points ago

That gif fits too well.

[–]Dukksoup 72 points73 points ago

as if it was planned.

[–]reposedhysteria 61 points62 points ago

Everything in the universe is coming together.

[–]Beiki 35 points36 points ago

good....good

[–]hunkacheese 12 points13 points ago

r/KarmaConspiracy

[–]humphrey244[S] 48 points49 points ago

Haha that's awesome!

[–]g0_west 21 points22 points ago

This is the first time I've questioned just what the hell it is that Finn is wearing.

[–]No_Refunds 17 points18 points ago

This is most likely a conspiracy.

Adventure time is set in a post-apocalyptic era where magic returns. During the apocalypse, those unicorn things (Same thing as Princess Rainicorn) started hunting down humans. Some humans decided to wear costumes to disguise themselves as animals. In Finn's case, he wore a hat to disguise himself.

[–]ChiefNugs 28 points29 points ago

The gif doesn't do it justice.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvYe1-Wg_MI

[–]ItsSkitters 78 points79 points ago

That is actually pretty amazing hair. I'm sorta jealous. It'll probably darken and get a bit more wavy/curly with age though. I was blonde with straight hair as a kid but am dark brown and pretty wavy now.

[–]Aaronneyer 19 points20 points ago

That's like my hair when I was younger, except I was not able to pull it off even a fraction as well as this kid.

[–]godmoderage 9 points10 points ago

My hair stayed straight. I'm growing it out.

[–]Forever_Awkward 9 points10 points ago

Do your part to help control hairball population. Stray your hairs, people.

[–]divinetheory 6 points7 points ago

I had blonde, almost white hair when I was his age as well, and mine also turned dark brown and extremely curly. It's crazy how your hair color changes with age.

[–]applepenguin 4 points5 points ago

Same with me and I hate it :/

[–]CaseyFnRyback89 3 points4 points ago

Mine was the same color, but in loose curls. As I aged it turned darker and darker till it hit the dirty blonde that it is now. It also went from loose curls to locks. If I wouldn't wash my hair, it would dreadlock naturally fairly easy.

[–]iceeater 3 points4 points ago

That's awesome. My SO was the same way! Yours must be super beautiful like hers.

[–]usernameblank 31 points32 points ago

[–]sassymcfresh 2 points3 points ago

his hair is GLORIOUS!

[–]humphrey244[S] 636 points637 points ago

So this is my little brother and Yes that's his real hair. My parents just can't bring themselves to cut it after 2 1/2 years. But he does make a good mini-demi-god

[–]worker_parasite 266 points267 points ago

It looks darling on him. So, so cute. I don't think I've ever seen a little boy with long hair like that.

[–]jwitham2002 453 points454 points ago

If he cuts the hair, it will turn brown, lose its power, and die.

[–]Swoove 146 points147 points ago

Flower, gleam and glow...

[–]dreamvortex 76 points77 points ago

Let your power shine

[–]JasmineSassypants 63 points64 points ago

make the clock reverse

[–]dreamvortex 66 points67 points ago

Bring back what once was mine

[–]JasmineSassypants 52 points53 points ago

heal what has been hurt

[–]ThunderTijo 151 points152 points ago

So call me maybe.

[–]padthaichi 16 points17 points ago

[–]fistea 9 points10 points ago

outstanding.

[–]iwannaplaywithfire 20 points21 points ago

Change the fate's design

[–]princesspootie 15 points16 points ago

Save what has been lost

[–]ass_herpes 3 points4 points ago

LET YOUR SOUL GLOW!

[–]MrShittyFatTits 30 points31 points ago

As a man whose fiance watches Tangled on a regular basis, I can confirm this.

[–]Unintentional_Boner 18 points19 points ago

as a man who is alone and watches disney movies on a regular basis, I can also confirm this.

[–]toast_toast_toasty 7 points8 points ago

His brother is Gilgamesh

[–]-sorel- 139 points140 points ago

So, so cute? I think you mean A-thor-able.

Edit: Ah, someone else independently arrived at the same pun earlier. My bad, laura_lee_meh. Also thanks to Legend_of_Mana for pointing that out.

[–]BrosophicalBro 28 points29 points ago

Hammer those puns out bro

[–]GlassHouseResident 65 points66 points ago

There's a typo in your title, Loki. It says "as" but I'm fairly certain it should have been "is".

[–]Jahonay 37 points38 points ago

As a guy who used to have really long hair, I think they should let him keep it if he likes it. If people think it's weird then tell them to go fuck themselves. If the kid likes it, why cut it?

[–]VanWinkel 12 points13 points ago

I had long hair like this as a kid. Many people assumed I was a girl.. It was a confusing time.

[–]avboden 63 points64 points ago

Please please please please make him good at football. Those luscious locks deserve to burst forth from the back of a helmet. It'll give him amazing power on the field.

[–]hoopstick 62 points63 points ago

[–]blackmajic13 14 points15 points ago

Was waiting for the Clay Mathews reference.

[–]victore992 29 points30 points ago

Clay Matthews is the Thor of football, without a doubt. His hair is so wonderful.

Edit: Just look at it in all of it's glory.

[–]andbruno 36 points37 points ago

HAIR IS THIRSTY. DRINK, LOCKS, DRINK.

[–]NomadofExile[!] 11 points12 points ago

This drink...I like it....ANOTHER!

[–]kidmerkury 15 points16 points ago

"Sunshine"

[–]log1k 27 points28 points ago

His hair is glorious!

[–]beleedat 16 points17 points ago

Thanks for sharing Loki!

[–]DaTScientisT 16 points17 points ago

Never. Cut. It. Only trim.

[–]LittleCeciliaMarie 7 points8 points ago

Are you/your brother of Nordic heritage?

[–]danchan22 11 points12 points ago

That's only 2 1/2 years?? My 3 year old hasn't had a hair cut yet and it's barely to his shoulders.

[–]ben_the_destroyer 59 points60 points ago

dude.... that kid has got some rockin locks!

[–]DEFCON_TWO 237 points238 points ago

"With my hammer, I will be unsto......oh look an ice-cream truck!"

[–]yodamaster103 89 points90 points ago

"this ice-cream sandwich, I like it. I'LL HAVE ANOTHER!"

[–]linkkb 58 points59 points ago

[–]barker235 6 points7 points ago

its weird how relevant this is...

[–]cor315 4 points5 points ago

There's a lot of that happening in these comments.

[–]beabea51423 15 points16 points ago

I require substanance

[–]BatMark 92 points93 points ago

*Sustenance. Also, Thor would DEMAND sustenance!

[–]cellosaremetal 339 points340 points ago

As a Scandinavian woman in my child-rearing prime,

I'LL TAKE TEN OF THESE!

[–]theoldicetongue 163 points164 points ago

they sell them at ikea... assembly required.

[–]PhanOfAndrew 44 points45 points ago

I can be the handy man to help you with that.

[–]FuCKiNTowel 7 points8 points ago

Try not to put anything on backwards or else you're fucked.

[–]LakeStClair 13 points14 points ago

I can help you with that, Agna.

[–]babysealsareyummy 5 points6 points ago

[–]Kensin 43 points44 points ago

Dost thy mother know thou wearest her drapes?

[–]winnar72 102 points103 points ago

r/aww worthy, but they mostly like cats and dogs. Desire to pinch the god of thunder's cheeks is growing.

[–]blazingboom 20 points21 points ago

I think this can beat out all those kittens and puppies.

[–]Dukksoup 13 points14 points ago

with the hammer?

[–]RainbowGoddamnDash 52 points53 points ago

If you give him a guitar and a black shirt, he can so be Skwisgarr

[–]babysealsareyummy 29 points30 points ago

This costumes is dildos

[–]wallaberry 17 points18 points ago

That is some badass little guy hair

[–]laura_lee_meh 283 points284 points ago

That's aTHORable!

[–]Nj_all_day 307 points308 points ago

[–]n3ro 120 points121 points ago

[–]workroom 45 points46 points ago

[–]robotusson 20 points21 points ago

[–]Disconcerted 40 points41 points ago

[–]HIPPOPOTANUS 47 points48 points ago

WHAT.THE.FUCK

[–]paczki_kid 61 points62 points ago

shhh just let it happen

[–]DeathToPennies 40 points41 points ago

Dude. As somebody with face-in-collarbone syndrome, I'm offended.

[–]Dukksoup 13 points14 points ago

as someone who has lost a penny, I'm offended by your username.

[–]DeathToPennies 14 points15 points ago

I hope that fucker died cold, alone, and unspent.

[–]squib28 65 points66 points ago

I bet he uses TH'OReal to wash his golden locks

[–]cris178 73 points74 points ago

Holyshit! I can finally use this http://i.imgur.com/QRIqN.gif

[–]aguyonline 24 points25 points ago

OP's so Loki to have a brother that cute.

[–]chubby_cat 56 points57 points ago

What a beautiful child.

[–]8GB 114 points115 points ago

[–]ishatbrx 27 points28 points ago

I saw somebody back there, but I thought it was just our boss's kid or something because he'd been back there for about ten minutes just messing around, but then he jumped out and I saw that he wasn't a kid, but was actually a full-grown man.

[–]CornyCotton 10 points11 points ago

I spooked ya!

[–]AWildSketchAppeared 380 points381 points ago

[–]RapedYourFriend 303 points304 points ago

[–]trivial_sublime 60 points61 points ago

I never thought I'd be able to say this with confidence, but this is the most fucked up exchange I've seen on Reddit.

[–]here_for_the_lols 27 points28 points ago

Get a room you two...
Actually maybe not.

[–]WarYoshi 63 points64 points ago

I need an adult?

[–]V33G33 36 points37 points ago

I am an adult.

[–]Alxariam 18 points19 points ago

I got that reference!

[–]Nightfalls 11 points12 points ago

I AM AN ADULT!

[–]duksa 3 points4 points ago

Nail! NAIL! NNNNNAAAAAAAAAIIIIIILLLLLL!!!

[–]paczki_kid 7 points8 points ago

Inside you?

[–]FuCKiNTowel 10 points11 points ago

ooh piece of candy

[–]deadair101_84 14 points15 points ago

rock star hair!!

[–]Duramax159 14 points15 points ago

Little dude has some glorious hair. He is gonna grow up to be a real lady killer, I'd say.

[–]Tito_Lebowitz 8 points9 points ago

Holy shit when your brother's 14 he's going to be slaying women like 4 at a time.

[–]wazzumz 17 points18 points ago

Walks into a pet store... "I need a horse!!!"

[–]amydancer 16 points17 points ago

that might be the most beautiful child i have ever seen

[–]puhrissa 20 points21 points ago

I see he has already taken out the other 98 duck-sized horses...

[–]girlnexzdoor 5 points6 points ago

Ctrl+F.... horses.... better than expected!

[–]filthgrinder 7 points8 points ago

That kid is HUGE! Just look how small the horses are!!?!??!!

[–]Yellowbird00 68 points69 points ago

My nephew as batman http://i.imgur.com/mxgJO.jpg

[–]howmanychickens 39 points40 points ago

That kid is buff

[–]lll111lll 5 points6 points ago

Good Guy Loki. Letting his brother get all the attention on Reddit.

[–]dirice87 10 points11 points ago

Is that his real hair? I know girls who would murder someone they love for hair like that

[–]Hiddlestoned 9 points10 points ago

So soo sooo cute!!!

[–]B_randy 5 points6 points ago

Awe, he's so cute! >.<

[–]xiaorobear 5 points6 points ago

Please tell me that's his natural hair.

[–]Last_Gigolo 2 points3 points ago

I fear the results of this young fella hitting facebook and the agenda whores changing his gender.

[–]Lauren9394 3 points4 points ago

What a handsome Thor he makes!

[–]Nisha1941 4 points5 points ago

My god.. Adorable isn't enough.. THERE ARE NO WORDS!

[–]Major_Armstrong 4 points5 points ago

This picture, I like it. Another!

[–]SPOCK_THOUGHT_FIRST 13 points14 points ago

Wait, your little brother is Chris Hemsworth??

[–]Roboticide 13 points14 points ago

BS, everyone knows Chris Hemsworth is like 9' tall.

[–]Raps_Like_Drake 9 points10 points ago

Little bruh with a hammer, mini Thor

Don't take the bull, Minotaur

Loki done slipped up, when he been there

Lil Thor on his way, mini avenger

[–]miss_milly_pink 6 points7 points ago

I like your midget horses

[–]Domthecreator14 6 points7 points ago

Does he even lift??

[–]tyzorflybyAGAIN 3 points4 points ago

You better trick r treat with him as Loki.

[–]bam2_89 3 points4 points ago

He looks like a young Viserys Targaryen.

[–]knoxblox 3 points4 points ago

That hair. Jesus. He'll be drowning in bitches.

[–]bake414 2 points3 points ago

hippie

[–]humansaregood 2 points3 points ago

Awesome costume! He's gonna get a lot of candy for sure!

[–]OBrienDustin 2 points3 points ago

This kid...bad ass!

[–]houstonyellow 2 points3 points ago

That is the most adorable superhero ever.

[–]CASUALRACIST_FUCK 2 points3 points ago

He's beautiful.

[–]rororourboat 2 points3 points ago

Omg he's such an adorable baby Thor!

[–]bogaa11 2 points3 points ago

He's so cute!

[–]deathmint 2 points3 points ago

"Could you fwost giants stop attacking? Pweeese?!"

"....okay...."

[–]twitch1982 0 points1 point ago

That's athorable.

[–]SuperMse 2 points3 points ago

Awwvengers, assemble!

[–]GLuGGycOw 0 points1 point ago

OMFG!! legit the cutest thing!!

[–]Yoloswaggerhound 0 points1 point ago

Come sit on uncle Jerry's lap

[–]ledanser 2 points3 points ago

best fucking reddit post, ever.

[–]ledzep4life 0 points1 point ago

I envy his hair.