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984
985

Loopholes... (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by Vinylwubtime

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[–]McPiggy 66 points67 points ago

I came to the conclusion long ago that stumbling upon a genie would necessarily result in a team of lawyers representing me and the genie each, and would be more hardcore contract negotiation than wish enjoyment.

[–]stevensky 21 points22 points ago

But after that phase, you get infinite enjoyment.

[–]LongWayToTheTop 16 points17 points ago

Nah. He dies before negotiations are finished and his wishes are tied up in probate for the next decade.

[–]stevensky 4 points5 points ago

But maybe he could use one wish to have the case solved in 20 seconds ?

[–]classy_bear 5 points6 points ago

Yes, but either the extremely douchey genie would have it solved in his favor unless you spent weeks deliberating on that wish.

[–]stevensky 9 points10 points ago

Fuck Genies, I am calling the devil.

[–]122boy 0 points1 point ago

He can still fuck you over too dont forget

[–]pwwilly 0 points1 point ago

and waste a wish that could have been more Sour Punch Straws? You sir have never had Sour Punch Straws...

[–]simly 1 point2 points ago

He wishes for immortality

[–]McPiggy 6 points7 points ago

The problem is, wishing properly would require very specific and detailed wording. For instance, you wish for 1 million dollars and the genie plays the old "take the cash from the local bank" trick on you. Jail. Or you wish for immortality. Great, now the world is destroyed from some cataclysmic event and you are alive for eternity in space while the universe experiences heat death. All your wishes would need to be checked by the best lawyers, so your genie doesn't screw you.

[–]122boy 0 points1 point ago

We need a nice long descussion about this topic. Where im not sure but we certainly need one

[–]HatesWhitePeople -1 points0 points ago

This is a repost

[–]ghanji 157 points158 points ago

You could also have done this: http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=2740#comic

[–]ThePasswordsGullible 30 points31 points ago

For those who don't know, hover over the red dot below the image.

Pretty much explains everything.

[–]Hiroic 16 points17 points ago

I've read every single SMBC and never noticed the red dot. Bugger.

[–]PrimeIntellect 20 points21 points ago

Then you've read nothing!

[–]Kygren 10 points11 points ago

I said good day sir!

[–]samuel_berg 0 points1 point ago

you've read nothing Jon Snow!

[–]sleeplessone 2 points3 points ago

Enjoy your weekend hovering over red dots.

[–]spreelanka 6 points7 points ago

shit, there's was another panel? in every smbc i've ever read?

[–]ThePasswordsGullible 5 points6 points ago

If it makes you feel any better, I've done the exact same thing now with xkcd, SMBC, and (NSFW)Oglaf (fucking epilogues, and two sets of alt-text for every single comic?). So I got wise, right? Started checking all new comics for alt-text, hidden pages, extra panels, whatever.

Then Girls with Slingshots comes along. I check the first comic. No alt-text or anything, I seem to be okay. 1000 comics later, I accidently hover over the comic. Boom. Alt-text. Turns out, she silently added it a few hundred comics in. So I get to go through again from the beginning, checking every single comic until I found out where she added it, then reading every one again from there...

[–]eviloverlord88 2 points3 points ago

Two... sets... of alt text for Oglaf? o_O

[–]ThePasswordsGullible 1 point2 points ago

Oh god. I'm so sorry. I've ruined your blissful ignorance.

It uses both alt and title text. Title is what's supposed to show up when you hover over an image; that's probably what you've been seeing. Some browsers (erroneously) display the alt text, though. Alt text is supposed to be what shows up if the image doesn't load.

Frankly, I'm not sure how you're supposed to get both texts. I've just been using developer tools and the likes to check it, you could also block images temporarily or view the page source. I think there are plugins/extensions for Chrome/Firefox which make it easy to view the alt text.

[–]flying-sheep 2 points3 points ago

You can use stylish to add a custom style and add something like:

#theimageid:after {
    content: attr(title) " / " attr(alt);
}

[–]SNAAAAAAAAAKE 2 points3 points ago

I read Oglaf for a long time before I realized there was a "NEXT PAGE" button. I had been clicking on the next story button for fucking forever.

[–]dont_press_ctrl-W 0 points1 point ago

Thanks for the info about Oglaf :O

I don't think there's an easy way to check both texts short of checking the source code, where they're stored next to each others.

It probably wouldn't be too hard to make a browser extension like the one for xkcd to display both below the comic.

[–]sleeplessone 0 points1 point ago

Wait, where is the second alt text in Oglaf?

[–]ThePasswordsGullible 0 points1 point ago

Just wrote this to someone else:

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/10o23i/loopholes/c6f8coi

[–]sleeplessone 0 points1 point ago

Oh god......

There goes my weekend.

[–]the_dayman 0 points1 point ago

Also Amazing Super Powers has an invisible question mark to the right of each comic.

[–]cwilliamson2 1 point2 points ago

That was amazing.

[–]RICH_LITTLE 291 points292 points ago

Another solution, for future reference: http://www.explosm.net/db/files/Comics/Rob/genie-lamp.png

[–]Bluedemonfox 52 points53 points ago

You can also become a gene genie yourself or become something godlike, therefore you can have anything and make anything you want how you want.

[–]The_Subtle_Knife 225 points226 points ago

It didn't work out for Jafar.

[–]Matt3_1415 64 points65 points ago

I wish i was a FREE genie

[–]Zebezd 20 points21 points ago

...Which robbed Genie himself of much of his power (though his powers are still awesome, they are not as awesome as when he was bound by the lamp). If I remember correctly.

[–]Matt3_1415 23 points24 points ago

I wish that I am the most powerful thing in the universe and that i am unbound and that all other things in the universe remain at the same power.

[–]Kazurik 12 points13 points ago

Do you watch the X-Files? If not you might want to check this out: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0751145/

[–]Zandrel 7 points8 points ago

I wish I was omnipotent. DONE

[–]Zebezd 5 points6 points ago

Well, try not to have an "and" in there, genies can snag you on those saying it means it's multiple wishes, can't have that (unless of course those are all your 3 wishes.)

[–]douglasmacarthur 1 point2 points ago

I wish that I am the most powerful thing in the universe and that i am unbound and that all other things in the universe remain at the same power.

I wish that my loopholes were not interfered with by metaphysical, cosmological, and semantic paradoxes.

[–]Matt3_1415 0 points1 point ago

What part of it says he was weakened?

[–]Zebezd 3 points4 points ago

I think he states something to that effect when he returns to Aladdin in the second movie, after he frees him in the first.

Went to wiki, here's the important part:

In the direct-to-video sequel The Return of Jafar (1994), the Genie returns to Agrabah [...] He tells Aladdin and Jasmine that he is no longer as powerful as he once was because free genies are not as strong as genies bound by lamps. Instead of having phenomenal cosmic powers with an itty bitty living space, he now has "semi-phenomenal, nearly cosmic powers" and is as free as a bird.

[–]Dark1000 1 point2 points ago

It's in the movie. Or maybe the sequel.

[–]ChaosCon 40 points41 points ago

PHENOMENAL COSMIC POWER!

itty bitty living space

[–]HalpBogs 5 points6 points ago

Anyone else read that out loud?

[–]Bluedemonfox 6 points7 points ago

Well that is his fault for asking the wrong way, genies can troll so many people over what they wish for just because they are never specific enough.

[–]victordavion 3 points4 points ago

I think there was a Twilight Zone episode about this. Excellent. I think Twilight Zone was the original XKCD.

[–]classy_stegasaurus 0 points1 point ago

What if I was always super specific?

[–]Ranlier 2 points3 points ago

Jafar fucked up by making it his third wish. Had it been his second, he could still have been freed with the third.

[–]Mtownsprts 6 points7 points ago

Gene, aren't we all genes?

[–]firepacket 5 points6 points ago

I am... Kazaam.

[–]Bluedemonfox 0 points1 point ago

Genie* :P

[–]dragonite_life -2 points-1 points ago

No... I'm wearing my jeans.

[–]Heretical_Fool 3 points4 points ago

"I wish I was omnipotent, omniscient, and omnipresent."

[–]Natanael_L 4 points5 points ago

... and you end up being that in a parallell empty universe.

[–]PeterHell 11 points12 points ago

make your own universe with black jack and hookers

[–]Irongrip 0 points1 point ago

Fuck it, I'll just make a big bang and sleep for 5 billion years, then go find me a planet to toy with.

[–]Natanael_L 0 points1 point ago

Then my next wish is for a unruly creature with equal power to you in your universe, showing up just after you went to sleep.

[–]pottyaboutpotter1 1 point2 points ago

You haven't seen the ending to Aladdin have you?

[–]Bluedemonfox 0 points1 point ago

I did which is why I would take precautions to prevent such a thing.

[–]Vanisaris 0 points1 point ago

PHENOMENAL COSMIC POWERS!...Itty bitty living space.

[–]ncstatecamp 0 points1 point ago

What about "I wish all my wishes came true?"

[–]BurntTheToast 1 point2 points ago

Wish for more genies.

[–]define_irony 0 points1 point ago

With itty-bitty living space

[–]qweoin 11 points12 points ago

also, xkcd

[–]apullin 2 points3 points ago

let's just keep reposting both of these comics every few weeks

[–]Bloaf 1 point2 points ago

Basically: I wish for a wish granting thing (it doesn't have to be a genie) that can grant an arbitrary number of wishes.

[–]harrys11 1 point2 points ago

Rob's drawing is the best.

[–]MEWOVER9000 -3 points-2 points ago

REPOST

[–]Basbhat -2 points-1 points ago

I'm both a little proud and ashamed that I can predict these 9 times out of ten.

I just opened to make sure it was more genies

[–]lalabubble 23 points24 points ago

But they just used their wish to wish that they could so they don't have another wish to wish for more wishes...

[–]daiz- 29 points30 points ago

Well for starters most genies traditionally grant 3 wishes.

Secondly, wishing you could wish for more wishes on your last wish is kind of paradoxical. The wish isn't fully granted unless you have the ability to wish for more wishes. If you have no wishes left, you still technically aren't capable of being able to wish for more wishes.

[–]mammothman42 10 points11 points ago

Wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish.

Wish has become Semantically Saturated for me now.

[–]haha0123 2 points3 points ago

Yes, indeed if you wish to make a wish.

you may swish for fish with my Ish wish dish

[–]Sapphic 0 points1 point ago

Now it just sounds like that noise you make when you're calling a cat

[–]Glebun 0 points1 point ago

TIL, thanks

[–]Anaklusmos 0 points1 point ago

More than half of the sources are written by some dude named Jakobovits, L.A.

[–]downvotes_are_great 3 points4 points ago

Stop hurting my head!

[–]Glassle 1 point2 points ago

but the genie could grant him his wish for wishing for more wishes, as long as those wishes wouldn't be fulfilled. He can always wish, they doesn't have to come true.

[–]vnkid 12 points13 points ago

There's no mention of it being the only wish/last wish.

[–]Steve_the_Scout 0 points1 point ago

3 wishes

Wish 1: That they could wish to be able to ask for more wishes.

Wish 2: More wishes.

And then you can have infinite wishes.

[–]The_Magnificent 50 points51 points ago

Why don't these genies just say that you can't wish for anything that results in getting more wishes?

[–]srsizzy 28 points29 points ago

"I wish that for all time moving backwards and forwards, everything I command followed by the words 'so shall it be done' shall become manifest in reality."

[–]Inamanlyfashion 21 points22 points ago

--immediately.

[–]The_Magnificent 0 points1 point ago

This would result in the ability for you to get more wishes. "And I command a genie to appear as to grand me 3 wishes, so shall it be done."

While with your newfound power, you wouldn't ever need any wishes, you do have this option because of that newfound power. So, that invalidates your wish.

[–]Smarag 2 points3 points ago

No it's the ability to fulfill my own wishes / do genie like magic. It doesn't "give" me more wishes from genies.

[–]srsizzy 1 point2 points ago

No, you just wouldn't be able to make "wishes" or "wish-granting mechanisms," you could easily add a clause that accounts for that.

[–]The_Magnificent 0 points1 point ago

Indeed. Once you add such a clause the wish would be perfect.

[–]gamask 73 points74 points ago

Because fuck you, that's why.

[–]The_Magnificent 4 points5 points ago

Well... can't argue with that.

[–]lydocia 5 points6 points ago

Because karma.

[–]martellus 5 points6 points ago

"I wish there were no rules to wishes"

Perhaps unspecific enough?

[–]ImPhone 27 points28 points ago

"Thus I no longer need to grant them." -Genie

[–]f03nix 4 points5 points ago

I wish there were no restrictions to wishes ?

[–]ragrath 1 point2 points ago

So he doesn't need to do them as you say. If you wish to become stronger, he can turn you into a block of muscle, or anything that is stronger than you etc.

[–]stevensky 2 points3 points ago

heh, fuck...

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]BoldElDavo 2 points3 points ago

Not really meta. That wish simply isn't allowed, so the rules never get changed for that wish to be allowed.

Also, that's not even what meta means...

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]BoldElDavo 0 points1 point ago

You can't wish for anything that results in getting more wishes.

You can't wish for the ability to wish for anything resulting in more wishes, because that breaks the genie's rules so it isn't granted.

[–]1ryan231 6 points7 points ago

What is this type of comic called?

[–]biztek 4 points5 points ago

http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/overconfident-alcoholic

[–]Thefriendlyfaceplant 6 points7 points ago

webcomic

[–]Harold_Grundelson 13 points14 points ago

Arabian niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiights,

Like Arabian daaaaaaaaaaaaaays

[–]Aeon_fuzz 5 points6 points ago

A fool off his guard, will fall and fall hard

Out there on the duuuuunes

[–]SammyD1st 4 points5 points ago

"...where they cut off your ear, if they don't like your face!"

[–]ANBU_Spectre 2 points3 points ago

...where they cut off your ear, if they don't like your face!

"Where it's flat and immense, and the heat is intense!" Think of the children!

[–]Didub 3 points4 points ago

Relevant XKCD

[–]apullin 4 points5 points ago

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/z798d/i_wish_i_could/

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/10ob29/loopholes/ (already reposted)

http://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/zbpmb/genie_wishes/

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/zdrme/genie_dilemmas/

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/zzgn0/i_wish_i_could/

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/zat7x/out_smarting_a_genie/

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/z6tln/you_cannot_wish_for_more_wishes/

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/zbtsu/i_wish_i_could/

Great thing we've got going here, reddit. Just awesome.

Also, people should learn about what an axiom and a tautology are.

[–]Dev1ousPengu1n 13 points14 points ago

Another repost

[–]Dick_chopper -3 points-2 points ago

And stolen from 4chan.

[–]hippyman933 6 points7 points ago

Repost.

[–]stevensky 8 points9 points ago

I wish there would be no repost.

[–]surfkw 3 points4 points ago

I wish you would just down vote

[–]jdarty21 -1 points0 points ago

I wish people would stop uploading reposts

[–]bluexadema 22 points23 points ago

I have been on reddit for 2 years and I have not seen it before. So relax man. Not everyone is subscribed to the same reddits or has the same amount of airtime.

However if this was something that was posted in a different subreddit in the last day or two then I would share in your disgust.

Thanks for your time.

[–]anymooseposter 11 points12 points ago

And I wish people would stop bitching about them.

[–]ChaosCon 1 point2 points ago

The great repost irony: people bitch about seeing decent content they've seen before by providing absolutely useless content again and again and again and again.

[–]chubbsmagee 0 points1 point ago

nowthatswhaticalledgy.jpg

[–]Antagonistic_Comment 0 points1 point ago

If people actually checked if their image was posted or not, reddit could be a gallery/list of interesting content. Imagine if you were looking for a specific webpage, but the wikipedia entry for that subject came up first. Now imagine if it wasn't listed just once at the top, but CONSTANTLY. Wikipedia page, other site, wikipedia page, wikipedia page, other site, other site, etc. Do you understand how much harder it makes finding things?

[–]eqgmrdbz 0 points1 point ago

Another way would be to make 2 wishes, then make your third wish to find the lamp again, that way the lamp will always be yours since you are the only one that can find it, unlimited wishes.

[–]UZUMATI-JAMESON -1 points0 points ago

Dos Equis.

[–]wookiesandwich -1 points0 points ago

*may

[–]sharksfan93 0 points1 point ago

I take it he had more then one wish? Because if he wasted his "one" wish on the ability to "wish for new wishes" he wouldn't have another wish to get multiple wishes

[–]JamEskimo 0 points1 point ago

This whole situation depends on, how many wishes he was given. If he only ha one wish or used two and only had one left. Then the genie would only have to say alright you now have the ability to wish for more wishes, but you used up your only or last wish in order to do so.

[–]calmlunatic 0 points1 point ago

but then he wouldn't be able to wish for more wishes would he?

[–]genzahg 0 points1 point ago

This is why we can't have genies. Assholes.

[–]joemundel -1 points0 points ago

Am I the only one that is pissed off that I have seen this before and still don't get it ?

[–]Callumjones229 0 points1 point ago

Its been bugging me a while where can i find more of these i dont know the name for them?

[–]zarexruhh -1 points0 points ago

Except then you would have used up your one wish.

[–]HarshTruth22 0 points1 point ago

Same comic every couple of weeks. FML

[–]Hamoham 0 points1 point ago

I posted this a month ago, OC ftw...

[–]friedsushi87 -1 points0 points ago

The problem with this, is if the rule is:

"You cannot wish for more wishes"

and you wish that this were not the case, then you've just used one wish to abolish the "You cannot wish for more wishes", and depending on how many wishes you had left, you could now technically wish for more wishes, but have no more wishes left to wish for the additional wishes.

:-/

[–]nonax 1 point2 points ago

wishing that you could wish to have more wishes only means that you can wish for more wishes, not that you can actually have more wishes, no?

[–]acespace 0 points1 point ago

I did this to my psychiatrist. She wasn't amused.

[–]thetravelers 0 points1 point ago

I lost it when I saw the gun, because he's a genie

[–]WanderinMan420 0 points1 point ago

You could wish for 2 things and on the last wish wish to go back in time right before you found the lamp with everything you have already wished for.. Find the lamp again, rinse and repeat.

[–]stevaughan 0 points1 point ago

Just saw this like two weeks ago.

[–]3ntidin3 0 points1 point ago

*cannot

[–]Tonytarium 0 points1 point ago

I wish i was omnipotent. Done.

[–]Mrmooncraft 0 points1 point ago

This was funny the first time i saw it

[–]suspiciously_calm 0 points1 point ago

Only works for 2 free wishes and up.

By wishing he could wish for more wishes, he used up his first wish, so he needs a second one to actually cast the wish to get more wishes.

[–]pupusamaniac 0 points1 point ago

But he didn't finish the sentence...

[–]adamsworstnightmare 0 points1 point ago

What was the original of this meme?

[–]Sergeantman94 0 points1 point ago

I would use the loophole of more genies.

[–]gm9k 0 points1 point ago

Is there a certain name for this character? I looove these comics

[–]Redrince65 0 points1 point ago

I dont get it, is this a repost or did the OP delete the original post? I'm sure I saw this post a few weeks ago...

[–]geoff11 0 points1 point ago

repost.

[–]ABentSp00n 0 points1 point ago

When I was younger, my solution was always more lamps.

[–]Eldrvarya 1 point2 points ago

Wait a minute... It's a-!

[–]zombi3mak3r 0 points1 point ago

yeah and repost

[–]PBandK96 0 points1 point ago

REPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOST!!!!!!!!

[–]redtuna 0 points1 point ago

Get stumped, become Salad Fingers.

[–]Cridon -1 points0 points ago

re-re-re-REPOSTE

[–]TheRedditSurvivalist 0 points1 point ago

Fucking repost..

[–]hastyspartan92 3 points4 points ago

In case anyone was wondering this is a repost

[–]bigggluke -1 points0 points ago

this was literally on here a few days ago

[–]Zakmondo 0 points1 point ago

Fucking repost!!!

[–]Ehrler -2 points-1 points ago

Reposts...

[–]SuperBananners 1 point2 points ago

REPOST! DONT FALL FOR IT!!

[–]Afaflix 0 points1 point ago

I wish I didn't

[–]Nickdd98 -3 points-2 points ago

This would work if you had 3 wishes, but with one, you wish that you can wish for more wishes, but then you're out of wishes, so....

[–]latros -3 points-2 points ago

I don't understand this joke. Am I dumb?

[–]chubbsmagee 6 points7 points ago

yup.

[–]graphickellie -3 points-2 points ago

I don't either :/

[–]graphickellie -2 points-1 points ago

Seriously? You down-vote me because I don't understand the joke?

Some redditors are such assholes!

Go ahead, down-vote this, too.

[–]Blissrat -2 points-1 points ago

This doesn't work. He now can wish for more wishes, however, he doesn't have any wishes left.

[–]online222222 0 points1 point ago

or, the genie has more than 1 wish

[–]R3PTILIA -3 points-2 points ago

i wish there wouldnt be more reposts

[–]Rastamasta4321 -2 points-1 points ago

Repost

[–]Mr-Geeb -5 points-4 points ago

AM I THE ONLY ONE HERE WHO KNOWS THIS IS A REPOST

[–]Official2m055 -2 points-1 points ago

Dat Username

[–]Kulhu 1 point2 points ago

He is MEGA HIPSTER!

[–]overused-meme-alert -1 points0 points ago

Dat Username

woop-woop-weeeeooo

.

[–]tian17 -2 points-1 points ago

what's the name of this meme? i can never find it

[–]biztek 0 points1 point ago

http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/overconfident-alcoholic

[–]count_funkula -1 points0 points ago

Reposts...

[–]project_asshole -3 points-2 points ago

Reposts...

[–]WingedKurivolt -2 points-1 points ago

what is this meme called?

[–]Ecthudan 0 points1 point ago

If you're looking for memes, you can always go to Know Your Meme. It's called "Overconfident Alcoholic (Depression Guy) or Nuthin's Funnier" by the way.

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