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top 200 commentsshow all 311

[–]notashleyjudd 168 points169 points ago

I guarantee 1 out of 5 people burn themselves with hot coffee or dump their weed on the floor.

edit: grammar

[–]dgd765 43 points44 points ago

i'm betting on burn themselves.

First toke, all is well. There is still weed and hot coffee. Second toke, kinda baked and sleepy. Forget theres hot coffee and burn crotch.

[–]KsigCowboy 22 points23 points ago

For wake and bake go Sativa!

[–]geosensation 24 points25 points ago

Implying everyone has a wide variety of choices when buying...

[–]DaClems 11 points12 points ago

I believe my deale- clears throat business partner with whom I have come to associate, calls his product "heyyou wantany?" I believe it is a type of kind of something or another. Never once has anyone told me the make and model of their sell. It is usually in bad taste and might make one of us look like an illiterate ass.

[–]TH3_FORC3 6 points7 points ago

Holy shit we must have the same business contact, that's what my stuff is called too!

[–]TurboSexaphonic 2 points3 points ago

I never get any good shit, mine is usually referred to as " good shit " or " broken F string ".

[–]KsigCowboy 2 points3 points ago

I guess I have been spoiled. Even in Texas a lot of dealers are getting their stuff from medical facilities now. I have been getting to pick strands for so long that I just assumed it was this way in most places.

[–]Peaceblaster86 1 point2 points ago

Sounds like an election slogan

[–]elastic-craptastic 4 points5 points ago

Is there a way to spot satia visually when buying? Like most, it is not legal in my state, and i can't got to a dispensary. The only reason I would ever smoke is to relax my neck muscles. I am not a fan of the head high anymore. So I'd rather go indica, but it's hit or miss when I buy and I hate having to find out the hard way.

[–]Ralt 13 points14 points ago

No, the only way to differentiate between cannabis sativa and cannabis indica is to see the plant while it is still growing, sativa has long spindly leaves, while indica has short fat leaves.

http://www.seedsplaza.com/images/sativa-vs-indica-leaves.jpg

Despite what people will say about colours, hairs, thickness of bud, smell, this is the only sure-fire way to tell. As someone who grew marijuana and also sold other peoples marijuana I was honest and up front, if I didn't grow it, I didn't know it. Dealers will usually try to tell you what you want to hear, but there's no way to determine if random guys pot is indica or sativa.

[–]elastic-craptastic 4 points5 points ago

That's what I figured.

[–]Ralt 1 point2 points ago

Yeah, sorry, it sucks balls. Hopefully one day medical cannabis will be a national norm.

[–]omgnodoubt 1 point2 points ago

If you have a good eye you can figure it out, some of my best friends were dealers and they taught me how to tell, look for leaves on the nug if they're long and skinny it's a sativa if they're short and fat it's an indica. Also the buds tend to be longer and skinnier if its a sativa.

[–]OckhamsRaiser -1 points0 points ago

A general rule of thumb is fruity vs earthy. If it smells like citrus, it's likely a sativa or sativa dominant, if it smells like mushrooms, dirt, or skunks, its likely a indica. Not always accurate, but often is.

[–]TurboSexaphonic 0 points1 point ago

To geek the bowl or spill the coffee; that is the question.

[–]sauceycompton 171 points172 points ago

where did you get this, did god hand this to you?

[–]crkhobbit 136 points137 points ago

I don't even smoke weed, and even I'm impressed and intrigued.

[–]Fishstixxx16 19 points20 points ago

I would eat so many pancakes after this...

[–]Rosetti 14 points15 points ago

It would indeed be bliss.

[–]DEFINITELY_A_DICK 0 points1 point ago

upvote for rhyming couplet.

[–]Devinator117 82 points83 points ago

It's not his, this is an old post from r/trees. He just reposted it

[–]hawksterdh 2 points3 points ago

Exactly. I feel cool now that I can call out OLD posts. That's at least 6-8 months old.

[–]fatalraindrop 46 points47 points ago

[–]OneCello 6 points7 points ago

Thank you.

[–]berryGentLEman 13 points14 points ago

Dank you

[–]Mindle 0 points1 point ago

i don't like those new ones. both way too expensive anyways.

[–]Fishstixxx16 1 point2 points ago

Reddit is now going to buy them out of their whole supply.

[–]mysticalbitch 0 points1 point ago

Thanks.

[–]superlumenal 33 points34 points ago

I can barely wake up in the morning as it is... that would put me right back to sleep.

[–]1nspect_Her_Gadget 24 points25 points ago

not if it's a sativa

[–]superlumenal 10 points11 points ago

I'm not enough of a connoisseur to know these things I guess

[–]1nspect_Her_Gadget 29 points30 points ago

Sativa is a mental kind of high, more "hallucinogenic", though it doesn't actually give you hallucinations, its the kind of high that gets your mind going fast and makes you think about shit in a really deep and yet hilarious way. an Indica on the other hand, give you the kind of high that makes your whole body feel heavy and tired and makes you somewhat lazy lol i take sativa for my ADHD before classees, and i take indica before to go to bed because of my insomina. Hope that helps :)

[–]illmoney 1 point2 points ago

Guy with ADHD here. Just now started taking medication and noticed that sativas always made me more hyper, at times even waking me up instead of putting me to sleep at night. I'll stick to indicas at night now

[–]1nspect_Her_Gadget 0 points1 point ago

dont take so much. have only a little bit before class or before when you're gonna need to be focused, and it works great.

[–]illmoney 0 points1 point ago

My dosage is prettly low 20mg extended release. I tend to just take 5-10 on normal days and the whole when I need it for school n shit

[–]1nspect_Her_Gadget 0 points1 point ago

oh is it adderall? 20mg ex. release is what i have too but i dont take it anymore lol i thought you were talking about weed like the rest of us

[–]illmoney 0 points1 point ago

Vyvanse now. Much better than adderall....no crash.

haha bud wise I'm fairly chill go through a couple of grams a week only. Tend to smoke at night after all my work n shit

[–]kkkilla 1 point2 points ago

i never thought i'd see someone explain this to someone OUTSIDE of /r/trees. it gets so repetitive there but i guess it's okay out here.

[–]1nspect_Her_Gadget 1 point2 points ago

Lol I used to be an extremely active r/trees supporter until my parents caught me smoking and I'm on supreme lockdown until I move out :(

[–]kkkilla 8 points9 points ago

r/trees is a community being taken over by immature teenagers that have nothing better to do than smoke weed. it used to be an intelligent community with intelligent, insightful conversations. now it's just all about how high you get and how much you can smoke and how much munchies you can eat. i miss r/trees from like a year ago.

[–]potato413 2 points3 points ago

[–]kkkilla 1 point2 points ago

yes, this is where i spend most my time lurking. Even though a lot of the people in their are a lot older than i am, but it's better. thanks.

[–]cardboardphone 2 points3 points ago

May I be so bold as to suggest that you probably just grew out of it? I have frequently browsed the subreddit since its inception and can say the posts really haven't changed much at all.

[–]kkkilla 0 points1 point ago

This is most likely the case. However I'm still convinced that the subreddit has been over saturated by adolescence. which I don't really recall before.

[–]1nspect_Her_Gadget 0 points1 point ago

We should start a new one.

[–]kkkilla 1 point2 points ago

/r/danks

do it.

[–]1nspect_Her_Gadget 0 points1 point ago

I was thinking r/THC lol

[–]1nspect_Her_Gadget 1 point2 points ago

I was thinking r/THC or r/bettermeds

[–]I3aisden 0 points1 point ago

Only if it was decaf

[–]ITellAtheistsCSB 114 points115 points ago

r/trees is leaking again... Redditor so high he posts in the wrong subreddit!

[–]OneCello 59 points60 points ago

Thats just like, your opinion man.

[–]BP8270 2 points3 points ago

Quick! Give me a lump of hash so I can plug the hole.

[–]jaker1013 12 points13 points ago

Goddamned lefthanders

[–]teaearlgreyhot 5 points6 points ago

What the hell did we do?!

[–]Pequin 0 points1 point ago

You started faggin up the place, it's o.k. ... she's my girlfriend too

[–]kingsleigh 0 points1 point ago

Oi.

[–]3rd_degree_burn 1 point2 points ago

We ought to have ourselves a good ol' fashioned lynch mob for all those fucking lefties.

THEY REPRESENT MORAL DECAY

[–]SpaghettiLeftovers 0 points1 point ago

You know, I thought the same thing too, but what hand do you light your lighter with and what hand do you hold your pipe with?

[–]Devon302 75 points76 points ago

hahaha? try /r/trees this isn't funny

edit: I don't want to come off as a dick, I really do think its an interesting post, its just not in the right place is all.

[–]depotman 22 points23 points ago

edit: I don't want to come off as a dick

Well, too bad, because OP is crying like a little girl right now.

I hope you're happy.

[–]Dem0n5 3 points4 points ago

Well, too bad, because OP is crying like a little girl right now.

I hope you're happy.

I don't know about Devon302, but I am.

[–]Devon302 -4 points-3 points ago

[–]publius4 -4 points-3 points ago

I think it's pretty funny.

Just because posts are cannabis-related doesn't mean they automatically should be restricted to /r/trees.

[–]Devon302 4 points5 points ago

what's funny about it? What about this picture of a coffee cup is hilarious to you? Just curious, not starting anything

[–]publius4 2 points3 points ago

I don't know, humor is hard to explain. I just thought it was a funny concept. We don't have to agree on it; humor is subjective.

[–]Devon302 2 points3 points ago

I agree. You think its funny, I don't. And life goes on

[–]mofish1 4 points5 points ago

I DON'T THINK IT'S FUNNY EITHER.

[–]TK_420 1 point2 points ago

X post from r/trees

[–]Icepick244 1 point2 points ago

Am i the only one who think this would end up quite gross? All that resin and ash being that close to where you drink?

[–]leaffur 8 points9 points ago

[–]bbbbush 2 points3 points ago

Fun tidbit; Caffeine can increase the effects of marijuana!

Also, i've heard bananas can too.

[–]too_many_legs 2 points3 points ago

Mangoes

[–]airwolf420 1 point2 points ago

also dark chocolate

[–]shittysongwriter 0 points1 point ago

thank you!

[–]smegroll 3 points4 points ago

I prefer 8 hours of uninterrupted rest, a balanced breakfast and a good, long jerk.

[–]ShoddyRapInBlue 0 points1 point ago

plausible deniability against paraphernalia laws?

[–]sniperkid1 1 point2 points ago

Who puts basil in coffee?

[–]HustlerThug 0 points1 point ago

r/trees is that way ---->

[–]nicko378 1 point2 points ago

This is siiiiick

[–]deec0rd 2 points3 points ago

Bowlgers. The best part of waking up, a fresh bowl packed in your cup. If I posted this ten hours earlier it would have been gold

[–]Burgee3236 3 points4 points ago

r/trees is leaking again

[–]coolrific 3 points4 points ago

fucking reposts...

[–]SrsSteel 3 points4 points ago

Didn't realize this was r/trees.

[–]lawlshane 7 points8 points ago

dae le ent??

[–]OoogaOoogaYoink 1 point2 points ago

That coffee is going to taste like FUCKING SHIT!!

[–]havocforming 9 points10 points ago

Pretty sure it's not a bong mug. Just a pipe mug. Like the bottom of the handle connects to the bowl. Just like with a glass pipe. But this pipe allows you to carry your coffee at the same time

[–]OoogaOoogaYoink 4 points5 points ago

If you google, "Bong coffee" this comes up. I know because I googled that two weeks ago after I saw Cabin in The Woods. I was looking for the stainless steel collapsible bong from the movie. I saw this picture in the results and it made me chuckle. So I just sorta assumed it was a bong. But that makes more sense, obviously. That'd be kinda hard to hit without making a mess.

[–]havocforming 1 point2 points ago

Yeah somehow I see sticking your face in the top of that mug would be both messy an rather scalding.

[–]springloadedgiraffe 0 points1 point ago

Drew Goddard did an AMA not too long ago and mentioned something about getting those collapsible coffee mug bongs made for retail because they have had enough marijuana-enthusiasts email about where to get one.

[–]OoogaOoogaYoink 0 points1 point ago

I hear the one they made for the movie cost $5,000 to make. Hopefully when they do a kickstarter and start making them they won't cost quite that much.

[–]vkirky 5 points6 points ago

whoah whoah whoah, that is clearly not coffee. It's tea, come on now.

[–]NghtRppr 34 points35 points ago

yo sum niggaz dont dig fluid mechanics. da bowl iz lower dan da level uh da liquid. coffee wuld b squirting out da bowl if it wuz uh water bong. yall is mad stupid!

[–]Rocket92 22 points23 points ago

basically he's saying that the coffee isn't used to filter the smoke, otherwise the coffee would straight spill out da bowl, ya dig?

[–]Doogragoo 8 points9 points ago

Yes Sir. I dig.

[–]MrDeckard 1 point2 points ago

It's okay, I speak Jive.

[–]Pravus_Obzen 4 points5 points ago

this. More or less...

[–]neoprint 1 point2 points ago

Why?

[–]Workhorse9 1 point2 points ago

Being a drug addict?

[–]NOGS42 -2 points-1 points ago

You really know nothing do you?

[–]papsfritas -1 points0 points ago

To the caffeine, maybe.

[–]CloseToMe 0 points1 point ago

Now everytime I get high I'm going to think about this and be sad because I don't have it.

[–]my_cat_is_a_jerk 0 points1 point ago

[–]joystickgenie[!] 2 points3 points ago

Ooohh... it's funny because he likes to smoke pot... hilarious...

[–]totallygeeky 3 points4 points ago

Sooo..... Where's the funny part?

[–]thesummerwind -1 points0 points ago

Wrong subreddit. Try r/trees

[–]Inv_Man 0 points1 point ago

Go back to tumblr.

[–]delbin 0 points1 point ago

I wonder why it's left-handed.

[–]Amaginer 1 point2 points ago

Seems like it would be really hard to operate and kinda awkward. Why not just by a pipe and drink you coffee?

To me it is like combining a fork and a mug. Sure, I use both with my mouth, but it won't make things easier to combine the two.

[–]Gonads_N_Strife_ 0 points1 point ago

it's called the poor man's speed ball.

[–]coltpoa -1 points0 points ago

OMG.

[–]Dirty0ldMan 1 point2 points ago

So much cream and sugar that it eventually gives someone diabetes?

[–]Suzohunter1 0 points1 point ago

Ahh it was already posted!

[–]rtfm_or_stfu 0 points1 point ago

All I see is equal parts coffee and cream.

[–]dickingaround420 1 point2 points ago

yeahh..where do i get one of these?

[–]McJew-Fro 1 point2 points ago

Cool repost!

[–]MarsColonist 0 points1 point ago

Wake n' bake with the ol' hippie speedball!

[–]monkeytorture 0 points1 point ago

For those who need to be wide awake while watching cartoons

[–]Phillyzombie 1 point2 points ago

I'm so sick of seeing this picture

[–]kikenazz 0 points1 point ago

How does coffee not spill out where the weed is?

[–]cruzedward81 0 points1 point ago

"Ah ha! I see what you did there."

[–]crabalab2002 0 points1 point ago

Unless you're left handed the bowl is on the wrong side of this cup.

[–]payphonepromise 0 points1 point ago

Aw man, why didn't I own this when life was carefree and I still partook in illicit activities?

[–]thelastormsbee 1 point2 points ago

When are we going to get the coffee mug bong from Cabin in the Woods? That's what I want to know

[–]lazylandtied -1 points0 points ago

Is that a tea bong?

[–]Rosetti 0 points1 point ago

Everytime I see this, I always think about how that mug is left handed, so I could never use it.

Also, I don't use mugs.

[–]TeRRoR503 0 points1 point ago

A good fap in yhe morning helps too.

[–]sillylivi 1 point2 points ago

Awesome but I feel like they would really cancel each other out.

[–]lexi_darling1370 0 points1 point ago

i need this NOW

[–]icanhaspoop 0 points1 point ago

Yes! Because I want to wake up immediately and then fall right back to sleep!

[–]atyndie 0 points1 point ago

Too many bowls of that green...No Lucky Charms!

[–]jpzivot 0 points1 point ago

Fffffuggin brilliant!

[–]deemeetree 1 point2 points ago

r/trees is leaking

[–]Rockerchick15 0 points1 point ago

Trying to think up a good Amsterdam coffee shop joke.....I got nothin'. Anybody else?

[–]shmallison 0 points1 point ago

except black and strong

[–]bslamon 1 point2 points ago

I cannot upvote this enough.

[–]wheezerboy 1 point2 points ago

This is one of the top posts in /r/trees. Reposting at it's finest

[–]purplepicklepicker 0 points1 point ago

a moldy coffee cup?

[–]gammarayzzz 0 points1 point ago

A marijuana related post outside of /r/trees that isn't downvoted to oblivion? I never thought I'd see the day.

[–]Chronetheus 0 points1 point ago

BEST CUP EVER

[–]armoredporpoise 0 points1 point ago

Cabin in the woods?

[–]knottylazygrunt 0 points1 point ago

Total deja vu. Saw this on R'trees & was like "whoa, trippy man" & now im like "man trippy, whoa"

[–]taint-misbehavin 0 points1 point ago

it took me a really long time to figure out why this mug was so special.

[–]visceralhate 0 points1 point ago

That looks like it wants to make me poop.

[–]Suasage 0 points1 point ago

It was titled "wake and bake."

[–]DoodleBob88 0 points1 point ago

You just won all of Reddit. Take it, it's yours.

[–]whatsweirdis 1 point2 points ago

My favorite time of the day to smoke:) where can we find this at? Google: coffee mug pipe?

[–]alexak93 0 points1 point ago

I need to have this.. I will be able to accomplish so much more in the morning!

[–]Meanfacemick 0 points1 point ago

HOLY SHIT THAT IS AWESOME!

[–]felloutthevault 0 points1 point ago

I see what you smoked there.

[–]NOGS42 0 points1 point ago

upvoted it for the trees and to get it to 666

[–]stonedreader 0 points1 point ago

i need it

[–]Dalisca 0 points1 point ago

That is the best coffee cup I have ever seen.

[–]Rushhourx 0 points1 point ago

u start a morning without Nutella? are u nuts?

[–]eduu17 0 points1 point ago

I am 666 guy yeah hhahaha

[–]GrandfatherFucker 0 points1 point ago

If you're criminal scum, yeah.

[–]WhosAsking 0 points1 point ago

Really? Pot smokers are scum?

[–]GrandfatherFucker 0 points1 point ago

Yes. Next question?

[–]WhosAsking 0 points1 point ago

Why do you think that?

[–]GrandfatherFucker 0 points1 point ago

Because they're criminals.

[–]ulleryg 0 points1 point ago

The best part of waking up is skunk in your cup...

[–]myeverymovment 0 points1 point ago

mmmm....coffee pot. or as I call it, suburban speedballing

[–]remjob61 0 points1 point ago

When the shit did /r/funny become r/trees. Fuck you.

[–]TashPoint0 -1 points0 points ago

When i open my coffee shop "Wake and Bake" these will the mugs i will serve my coffee in.

[–]HolePunch66 -4 points-3 points ago

Wake and Bake.

[–]OneCello 2 points3 points ago

no shit.

[–]PrimeIntellect -1 points0 points ago

this is known as a Seattle Speedball, quite popular in the northwest

[–]Tera_Lizard -1 points0 points ago

I need one of those cups!!!

[–]fruitofzaloom 1 point2 points ago

... coffee pot?

[–]afihavok -2 points-1 points ago

holy mother of awesome

[–]cmmoyer 1 point2 points ago

Would you like some coffee with that creamer?

[–]trampus1 1 point2 points ago

I think it's tea.

[–]dachef -2 points-1 points ago

It's nice to smoke weed in the mourning to get over the pain of working a dead end job and having no direction in life.

[–]ZboogiemanZ 2 points3 points ago

Please learn to spell BEFORE you decide to post a Half-assed insult.

[–]dachef 1 point2 points ago

Sorry I was high when I wrote this.

[–]NRevs95 -5 points-4 points ago

Why are these not in every house in america?

[–]jnethery 1 point2 points ago

Because, believe it or not, the majority of Americans don't use illegal drugs.

[–]ginnj 1 point2 points ago

Is there a carb?

[–]AmeriSauce -2 points-1 points ago

Coffee would spill on the weed :( but I want to believe this thing is practical and awesome.

[–]CptOblivion 0 points1 point ago

That's a really clever but simultaneously pretty depressing device. It's basically saying "I can't function unless I'm full to the brim with stimulants and depressants."

[–]ScreechinSquaw -2 points-1 points ago

Every morning? I wouldn't hire you.

[–]BobSaget12345 -2 points-1 points ago

Where can i find this ?

Edit: Oh i get downvoted for asking a simple question, Fuck you reddit..

[–]bassclef66 -5 points-4 points ago

WANT

[–]seechao -3 points-2 points ago

I keep throwing money at the screen but nothing is happening! I need it so badly...

[–]Cooldude638 -3 points-2 points ago

Marijuana is illegal, asshole.

[–]entarefurdurp -5 points-4 points ago

[–]ghastlyactions -1 points0 points ago

That would be awesome if it wasn't left handed.

[–]Reddit_minion97 -1 points0 points ago

Something you got against lefteys? punk?

[–]Chumpponis -3 points-2 points ago

Shut up and take my money!!!!

[–]tripstuff -1 points0 points ago

TAKE MY MONEY.